Next Level University

The Top 3 Lessons From 2024 (1934)

• Kevin Palmieri and Alan Lazaros

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What if your frustrations were guiding you to something better? In this New Year’s episode, Kevin Palmieri and Alan Lazaros share their top three lessons from 2024, revealing how hard work, authenticity, and resilience shaped their most successful year yet. Through personal stories and practical advice, they explore why frustration can lead to meaningful growth, how aligning with your values prevents burnout, and why working hard is the first step to working smart. Don’t miss this motivating conversation packed with insights to help you start 2025 strong.

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Kevin: https://www.instagram.com/neverquitkid/
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Alan@nextleveluniverse.com

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Kevin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kevin-palmieri-5b7736160/
Alan: https://www.linkedin.com/in/alanlazarosllc/

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Show notes:
(2:49) Lessons from overcoming shingles
(7:01) Working smart Vs. Working hard
(16:15) Frustration as a signal for growth
(26:30) Health and fitness turnarounds
(29:04) Meet like-minded people and jumpstart your journey to achieving your dreams

Send a text to Kevin and Alan!

🎙️ Hosted by Kevin Palmieri and Alan Lazaros

Next Level University is a top-ranked daily podcast for dream chasers and self-improvement lovers. With over 2,100 episodes, we help you level up in life, love, health, and wealth one day at a time. Subscribe for real, honest, no-fluff growth every single day.

Kevin Palmieri

maybe you didn't have the best successful or the most successful year financially that you ever had. Maybe you didn't meet the person that you wanted to meet. Maybe you're not in the best shape you've ever been, but if you really did work on you and so much of it is invisible and I bet you a bunch of it hasn't even bubbled to the surface yet you probably had a way more successful year than you realize.

Alan Lazaros

Frustration leads to fascination, leads to transformation. That's what I say, and it. Frustration leads to fascination, leads to transformation. That's what I say, and it sounds kind of fortune cookie. Frustration leads to fascination, leads to courage to actually express it, which then you can have a conversation about how to actually solve it. You're never gonna solve a problem you're not frustrated enough to solve.

Kevin Palmieri

Welcome to Next Level University. I'm your host, kevin.

Alan Lazaros

Palmieri, and I'm your co-host, alan.

Kevin Palmieri

Lazarus At NLU. We believe in a heart-driven but no BS approach to holistic self-improvement for dream chasers.

Alan Lazaros

Our goal with every episode is to help you level up your life love health and wealth.

Kevin Palmieri

We bring you a new episode every single day on topics like confidence, self-belief, self-worth, self-awareness, relationships, boundaries, consistency, habits and defining your own unique version of success Self-improvement in your pocket every day, from anywhere, completely free.

Kevin Palmieri

Welcome to Next Level University, next Level Nation. Welcome back to another episode of Next Level University, where we help you level up your life, your love, your health and your wealth. Today, for episode number 1,934, you'll be proud of us because we're actually doing something on the day. We're supposed to be doing it the top three lessons from 2024. So if you are listening to this on the day it goes live, that would be Wednesday, january 1st 2025. And we figured we usually try to do episodes like this but then we forget. So I think last year our New Year content started on like the 3rd or 4th of January. This year we're doing better.

Kevin Palmieri

Happy New Year's. Happy New Year's, happy New Year, new Year's Day yeah, but you've got to pick one. It's a new year, it's not New Year's, but it's New Year's Day. Right, a little English lesson, you know amongst friends, all right, so we didn't, really we didn't make a list. We said we were just going to kind of discuss it, because that's really where this podcast started. It started from a place of just having deep conversations about stuff, and sometimes we come with lists and other times we don't, and I feel like I don't know. Sometimes the best conversations come from just freestyling it. So do you have one on the top of your, on the top of my? Absolutely not, I do no, you.

Alan Lazaros

I do?

Lessons from overcoming shingles

Kevin Palmieri

I do have one. Okay, you should start, then I will start, do you remember? I believe it was last January when I had shingles.

Alan Lazaros

Oh yeah, you remember that.

Kevin Palmieri

Yeah, that lesson for me was I am capable of handling a lot more pressure than I thought I was. I think the reason I got shingles is because of how stressed out I was. I don't think it was anything else. We had brought on a new client recently. I was doing a ton of the work myself. It was just mayhem, and it was. I slept in the guest room for the entire time pretty much because I couldn't sleep. I was just so itchy and it was brutal, but I still tried to do the stuff that I had to do. There were still we didn't miss episodes. It was interesting, to say the least.

Alan Lazaros

I remember shout out to Amy on the team. She said Shingles is not a joke, it sucked. He's in trouble Zero to ten. How bad was Shingles? Because here's one thing, I'll just bring people behind the scenes Kevin endures a lot of pain. So I think sometimes I feel I remember Amy saying like that's and I know, amy, I know you're listening right now I remember her saying like he's, I think he's underestimating how bad Shingles is going to be. And I had this moment and I said I think Amy might be underestimating your level of grit Because you were working hard throughout the entire thing. Yeah, and I remember thinking to myself I can't tell if I'm underestimating how bad Shingles is or if she's underestimating how great you are. And I think it's probably both.

Kevin Palmieri

It was, honestly, for me it was more itchy than anything. It wasn't like super painful, it was more this weird like internal itch that, no matter what you did, didn't go away and it would just. My biggest thing was I couldn't sleep. I would lay down at 10 o'clock and I would not go to bed until two or three in the morning. Almost every day it was terrible. Yeah, it was absolutely terrible. The pain I don't remember the pain being too bad, but it was more just, it's like an itch you can't scratch because it's not.

Alan Lazaros

It's like internal weird it's weird, but yeah that that. What was your lesson from that?

Kevin Palmieri

I'm, I can handle way more pressure than I I thought I could. Today. It's weird because, again, business has grown a lot and we have way more clients than we've ever had across the business and this week has been just crickets and WhatsApp all week because everybody's celebrating and it reminds me of how heavy some of the weeks have been, just in terms of how many messages there are and how I used to wake up and the first thing I would do is I would check my WhatsApp and I would batch my emails, and now I don't do that until after my mobility and my learning, and that's a huge. That's been a game changer for me for sure. I remember being in the gym and getting a message from a client and having to leave the gym to go fix the problem and it was fricking terrible and the amount of pressure that was around.

Alan Lazaros

That was just huge, but that was the white whale, but that was the white whale client.

Kevin Palmieri

That was the white whale client yes, I'll provide some context.

Working smart Vs. Working hard

Alan Lazaros

So for those of you who know Moby Dick, the famous novel, I used to Kev's like dude, can you imagine? And whenever something starts with, can you imagine? You always got to be careful, and my first lesson with that would be what when you go off of the fundamentals to try to chase a shiny object, it it almost always doesn't work out. We learned a lot. Sometimes you have to go off the path to learn what the path actually is. So I'm not. There was actually a lot of good that came from that, but we overdid it for sure. When did it hit the point where you were like I'm fucking this up?

Kevin Palmieri

I don't know if it ever really did, because for me it was whatever. I'll say yes and then I'll figure it out and it is what it is. So in the beginning it was that I mean, I was doing a lot of stuff. There was a lot of stuff. Every morning I would get up at 5, and I would do I don't know five to five to seven businesses social medias a day, five days a week, and then on Saturday I would try to get ahead and prep content for next week.

Kevin Palmieri

But I was spending five hours every day doing somebody else's social media. Five days a week I was probably spending 25 or 30 hours a week doing their social media on top of seven episodes and being on other podcasts and serving the other clients we have. But again, I'm not suggesting anybody does this, but in the beginning you kind of have to eat. You just kind of eat dirt and figure it out and eventually, hopefully, eventually, you realize, okay, I'm putting too much time into this, let me go do something else, okay, the first lesson for me is working smart, not hard, is not practical, because usually you don't work smart until after you work really hard.

Alan Lazaros

The reason why that white whale thing, that potential client of 16 businesses, is what you were going for and you were going to do the social media for 16 businesses that was the plan yep, that was the plan, and kev's like imagine, and I'm with you, yeah, that would be, that would be awesome.

Alan Lazaros

You eating dirt, doing all of that. Hard work, gritty work, wake up, do it. That created systems and structures that allowed us to actually become more effective and more efficient. And now we have a company called Next Level Social Media within our company, a department within our company that is now running on some of the stuff that you built through that time.

Kevin Palmieri

That sucked. I like I really genuinely hated my life for those months. It was terrible. I mean it was terrible Again. You don't really notice in the time, but when I look back, like my life is so much better now in terms of just quality of life day to day, it was. I mean that's why I got the shingles. That's one of the reasons for sure, cause I was under so much pressure.

Alan Lazaros

If it wasn't for that client, you don't think you would have.

Kevin Palmieri

No, I don't think so, I can't imagine.

Kevin Palmieri

I was just so I was just so stressed out. This was another lesson for me. I was excited when that client left. I was excited when that client left. I was genuinely. I mean, we lost thousands of dollars a month. When that client left, I told the team like I'm actually happy because the amount of stress and pressure that this is bringing is not worth the money. It's just not. I'm so focused, I have to be so focused on this and I'm losing sleep over. It's just not sustainable. It's not yeah, it's just not sustainable. It's not, yeah, it's just not sustainable.

Kevin Palmieri

And if you said to me, kev, you'll get to a point this year where you lose one of the biggest clients you've ever had and you'll be excited about it, I would say there's no way. That would never happen, no way. So again, whether you're watching or listening, maybe you're not an entrepreneur or a business owner, maybe that piece doesn't apply directly to you, but if you are sacrificing one of your core values or your core beliefs for a core aspiration and something's in conflict, that is a very fast way to end up miserable and then just not know why, why it's like well, I have everything I wanted. Why am I miserable? Because you don't have everything you wanted. You have a bunch of the things that you wanted at the detriment of something that you value deeply, and that's I made that mistake in my twenties. That's why I ended up as low as I did, because I traded in so much for money, and I think that's a pattern I have. Right, we? We know that about me. I'm trying to grow the business, I'm trying to make more money for us, and sometimes I'll come with some wild ideas.

Kevin Palmieri

But I think a lesson maybe that you don't recognize as much yet is telling the truth. You and I had a conversation today about traveling and you, you gave me some truth and I think I don't know I think you've told a lot more. And I think I don't know I think you've told a lot more. Does everybody appreciate it? I don't know. I think the right people appreciate it, but I feel like the truth is the fastest way to change, because if you're not aware, we can never be on the same page if you're not writing your actual truth on the page and vice versa.

Kevin Palmieri

So that's a lesson I've noticed in you that maybe you didn't notice, for we can never be on the same page if you're not writing your actual truth on the page, and vice versa. So that's a lesson I've noticed in you that maybe you didn't notice for yourself In 2024?

Alan Lazaros

Mm-hmm, I would say that's something that I've improved a lot and I'm far more courageous in my truth. This is another one too. So the first one one is work smart, not hard is paradoxical, because in order to work smart, you have to work hard first. That's number one. Number two would be I just had it.

Kevin Palmieri

It'll come back. It always does.

Alan Lazaros

Oh, frustration. I am convinced, emil and I, in our relationship, we we were on a walk one time in 2024, one time way back, you know, it was in 2024, and I was talking about frustration and I was talking about how, how important it is to express, and this goes along with the truth. When you're talking about how important it is to express and this goes along with the truth one, you were talking about how important it is to express what you're frustrated with, and the reason why is because if you don't, you won't necessarily have the necessity to improve it. So I expressed to you earlier something I was frustrated with when you travel. I expressed to you earlier something I was frustrated with when you travel that innovation or improvement this is a self-improvement podcast is predicated on me expressing a frustration. It doesn't mean attack Kev and you're the worst. It means here's something I've noticed and it's a little bit frustrating. And I told on that walk back to that with Emilia. She said what are the twos and threes? Because I always express the tens.

Alan Lazaros

Eventually, I do because they're so frustrating that I have to get it the fuck out, like I have to tell you, and the truth is is when you have these goals and you have a math brain. You can calculate when you're Jeffed, like I can calculate when we're screwed. You can calculate when you're jeffed, like I can calculate when we're screwed. And I know if you keep doing x, y and z, we're never going to get to w. I just picked letters there but and my brain goes tell him the fucking truth, like tell him, because what is frustration? Frustration is an obstacle in the way of you achieving a goal. If you're. You talked about squatting earlier in the year and your knees kept behind your knees or your legs hurt.

Kevin Palmieri

Right, that was really frustrating. It was the worst.

Alan Lazaros

Well, you wanted to achieve XYZ goal in the gym and you couldn't do squatting, so therefore you were frustrated. So to me, emilia, on that walk, she said well, what are the twos and threes? Cause I always express the tens? And that was really fascinating because I thought to myself, wow, there's a lot of these twos and threes that I would, I would never mention. You always say it's a hill I'm not willing to die on.

Alan Lazaros

Well, here's the thing, man, those 1% improvements, like what are the twos and threes that annoy you? Like, obviously me being late, we get it Level 10. Okay, what are the nines and the eights and the sevens and the twos and threes? Now, you can't. You can't spend your entire life just telling everyone in your life every little frustration, like you got to have grace.

Alan Lazaros

However, business partners, intimate partners, people you work with, that you consistently work with, there has to be some level of you know what. Honestly, I think this, this and this makes this really hard for me. I'm a little bit frustrated, and when you say a little bit frustrated, I feel like it works really well. All, all improvements, all innovations, all, yeah, improvements, self or otherwise, or external processes is hey, I think this is annoying me.

Frustration as a signal for growth

Alan Lazaros

I feel frustrated that we're up against this and there's something off, there's something wrong. So I can calculate okay, kev is doing this thing and we're trying to get to this goal, and if he keeps acting that way, we're never going to get to the goal. I'm frustrated. Okay, I need to tell him that, otherwise he can't possibly change, and I think that that's. That takes tremendous courage. It's, it's. Frustration leads to fascination, leads to transformation. That's what I say, and it sounds kind of fortune cookie. Frustration leads to fascination, leads to courage to actually express it, which then you can have a conversation of how to actually solve it. You're never going to solve a problem you're not frustrated enough to solve.

Kevin Palmieri

It makes sense, and I think the expressing your truth part is really hard. That's the thing we can't. I mean, I don't know. I think it's nice to think that people can read our minds and the people that really get us it's like, well, they know more but nobody really knows what you're thinking all the time there's no way, of course, because we don't.

Kevin Palmieri

I don't know what I'm thinking all the time. How can I expect anybody else to know what I'm thinking all the time? I have to figure out what I'm thinking first, so that's always.

Alan Lazaros

That's always an interesting one I think frustration might actually just have this breakthrough. Frustration might be your emotions trying to tell you that you or someone else is inflicting on a goal or a core value well, something's misaligned yeah something's misaligned that's exactly what frustration is.

Kevin Palmieri

Yeah, something's misaligned, something's off, but you can get frustrated about being in traffic.

Alan Lazaros

Yeah, but there's nothing you can do about that, so that's yeah Well there is, maybe there is, though, yeah, yeah, you can leave earlier or prepare.

Kevin Palmieri

Yeah.

Alan Lazaros

There always is something you can do.

Kevin Palmieri

Yeah.

Alan Lazaros

And I think people have this aversion to complaining because it's well, I don't make excuses, I don't like to complain. You're kind of a complainer. No, no, I'm not complaining to complain, I don't like to just complain about Kev. That's not the goal.

Kevin Palmieri

The goal is how do we improve? You've made quite a living complaining about Kev.

Alan Lazaros

No, illustrious.

Kevin Palmieri

Illustrious career so far. Well, the complaining luckily leads to a lot of transformation. Well, again, that's the thing. I know I screw up things all the time. That's a piece of it. And the other thing, too, is, as long as you feel like what somebody is frustrated with is helping you get to your goals too, that's the thing. If Alan comes to me and says I'm frustrated with this and it's like, dude, I don't care, that's where things get wonky, it's like, well, I don't, it doesn't affect me. Well, it does.

Alan Lazaros

If it, if it's my goals, it affects me well, that would be another lesson that you've brought to. We're giving each other the lessons, but you said it's me and the client versus their goal. It's not me versus the client. That was powerful. I've been talking a lot about triangulation. That's kind of what it is when I'm coaching someone. I'll just use Kev as an example, because we're here. The thing I told him earlier it wasn't Kev, I'm attacking you. Here's the problem that I'm seeing. Here's the pattern that I'm seeing. That is not going to allow us to succeed If we continue that. And my fear is I I think I said it this way I said my fear is, when you travel, this is going to happen again, and I wasn't like attacking you. It was just expressing a fear, a concern, which is just a fear, like a lesser fear. And it wasn't me versus Kev, it was me and Kevin versus the problem.

Kevin Palmieri

I think that's a I know I gave.

Alan Lazaros

I said that and you gave me credit for that, but I think it's a really no. No, no, no, it's okay, but I think it's a really good. That was all me. It's a really good perspective.

Kevin Palmieri

It's a really good perspective to have. It's not the. Where this came from is I was talking to the team about communicating with clients and I said, very sorry, take it easy over there, please. Yeah, that's my bad. Very rarely is it us against the client. It's us and the client against their problem. It's a team. That's what makes it a team or against their goal or against their expectation or whatever it is.

Alan Lazaros

Can you give an example with the goal thing Because that's what I'm doing, too now with clients which is listen, you don't have to change anything. I'm not here to tell you what you can and can't do. However, if you don't change this, I don't see you achieving this. So, if you want to achieve this, we got to do something here.

Kevin Palmieri

It's usually like quick turnaround stuff when somebody would say, hey, I have an episode I recorded. It's a special one, can we drop it in three days? My fear is, if we do do that, we're going to have to shortcut a lot of stuff and we're not going to have your social media content ready on time and all the stuff that we've been smooth with up to this point we're probably not going to be. Is that something you still want to do? I'm just literally telling you it's not going to be as smooth as it usually is. Some people say yes, like yeah, whatever, it's a special episode, don't worry about it.

Alan Lazaros

Well, you said earlier, it might not be up to the standard you're used to.

Kevin Palmieri

Yeah, or the standard that we've delivered on in the past. Well, the past, well, what would old kev do? I old kev is new kev still does oftentimes what old kev will do, says yes and then tries to figure it out, but only if I would you share it that way?

Alan Lazaros

I feel like old kev would have just tried to do it and then kind of taken an l I try to say it might not be to the standard you want.

Kevin Palmieri

Sometimes I'll say, well, it's all good, I'll just do it myself, like if I know the team is busy and I don't want to put it on the team because I know they have other stuff going on. Sometimes I'll just say, yeah, I have time, I'll do it tomorrow. So I'll make sure it gets done, because I don't want to put that on the team, but it depends. Last week somebody said hey, I know this is a ridiculous turnaround, and just say no if you can't do it, but this video is very timely. Is there any way we can get it out in two days? And every piece of me wanted to say, yep, I'll figure it out and I was like no, we can't, there's no way.

Kevin Palmieri

I'd rather just push it. I'd rather just push it. And they said, honestly, let me think about it, based on the information, and then they went in a completely different direction. I was like, well, we didn't have to do that anyway, so it ended up working out nicely. But I think that's like a self-worth thing.

Alan Lazaros

Yeah, but I think the other side of that too. Sorry to interrupt you the other side of that, too, is if you're a business owner, people always say well, you work for yourself, I want to work for myself. I was on a coaching session recently where she said I just want to work for myself. And I said listen, business owners don't work for themselves, they work for their clients and for their customers, like we're all of service. I'm the ceo of the company I. I have many leather people. I work for I have many leather bound books?

Alan Lazaros

I actually don't. Uh, unfortunately, it makes me sad. Apparently I want a big, huge library one day, emily, and I have books scattered all around the house, and it made me sad recently. I want a library. That didn't make me sad, but I'm excited anyways. Uh, I'm the CEO, but I have, I work, I serve like I'm here to serve. I'm not you know. I serve all my clients. They don't serve me. Business is different than I thought for sure, yeah.

Kevin Palmieri

And again, I don't want to go down that because, again, if you're not a business owner, it doesn't, it's not necessarily valuable, but it's definitely different than I expected for sure. Maybe, expected for sure, maybe one day anyone out there who does want to work for themselves.

Alan Lazaros

Yeah, get used to saying, get used to working for other people, yeah, yeah, get really used to. Well, I want to make my own schedule. It's well, I kind of do you know, but you still have to generate revenue through customers and clients, yeah, so I think that's just a little side tangent.

Kevin Palmieri

Another one for me was A lot can turn around very quickly. It's this weird thing, where and not just in money what?

Alan Lazaros

Nothing what? There's a small part of me again. Well, I helped with that. Of course, you know what I mean. Yeah it's like when I went into business with Emilia. It's wow, this thing really runs itself. Huh. It's great.

Kevin Palmieri

Well, I don't mean it just. I don't even mean in money necessarily.

Alan Lazaros

I just had that moment of because you're right, we did pivot and turn things around very quickly, but I also know what that took too right.

Kevin Palmieri

Yeah, well, I'm thinking. So we were talking about the gym and squatting Again at this point last year I wasn't even exercising consistently and now I'm back to very consistent in the gym and I feel good. I'm squatting.

Alan Lazaros

I just started doing legs. I was like ah, I just asked kevin what, what happened, what?

Kevin Palmieri

I did mobility. Show me a squat video.

Alan Lazaros

Yeah, you're like yeah, I just started doing mobility. It just kind of went away, it just did I started doing mobility. Sorry, the, the nutrition piece. You're also eating a lot, dude.

Kevin Palmieri

I'm telling you I was eating a lot, the body feels like no, I was eating. I was eating a lot the whole time for me I had lower back.

Alan Lazaros

We had some issues, didn't we? In 2024 I had pulled out my back and I had never had a back issue in my whole life. But you and I do a lot of sitting right too much, too much sitting and I talked to emilia about it. I said my back's been awesome again, stay humble, but it's been awesome. I was in the crushing it yesterday and I was thinking to myself you know what it is I'm eating.

Alan Lazaros

I'm eating so much food again I can't stand when I'm in a constant deficit. That's when my back throws out because I'm training every freaking day and I'm not eating enough. Deficits are not good for the body. I think they're not. They're not right?

Kevin Palmieri

No, they're not.

Alan Lazaros

I mean, I feel so much healthier right now.

Kevin Palmieri

I think they're good for certain things because if you're burning fat, you're most likely. I think when you're burning fat're most likely. I think when you're burning fat, what you eat doesn't matter as much yeah, for sure right, because you're not sustaining everything that you're taking in.

Health and fitness turnarounds

Alan Lazaros

I'll give a tiny example real quick. So I remember I was eating a dozen eggs back in my fitness competition days fitness modeling, fitness coaching and someone was like that's so bad for you, that's so much cholesterol. And I said I'm in a deficit. None of none of this cholesterol is storing. This is all going to use, not to mention cholesterol, and tests are very connected. Like it's, I was burning 4500 calories a day. Back then. All I did was work out. And again, that's just a tiny example of when you are in a deficit. Again, we're going off tangent here. But the cholesterol doesn't store. When you're in a deficit, it uses that as fuel. So when you're in a deficit, people think like, oh, you got to be careful about the wrong types of cholesterol and stuff. Not really it's not storing, it's not like there's extra cholesterol in your blood, it's using all of that as fuel, right? So again, 50 trillion cells in your body.

Alan Lazaros

They all need a lot of nutrients when you're in a deficit for too long and they all go without, not only does your brain not work as well, but your whole body doesn't heal as well. Yeah, like surplus is great, but you can overdo that, obviously if you're overweight or that kind of thing.

Kevin Palmieri

So well, you can overdo both. You're in a bodybuilding show. You're overdoing the deficit for sure if you're cutting for sure. So the point that I was making with that is it seemed impossible for me to go to the gym and do legs. I didn't think that was going to happen. And then I started doing mobility and taking it a little bit more seriously. It's not like I wasn't doing it, I was doing it. It's not.

Kevin Palmieri

I'm not saying that the reason this happened was because I wasn't doing mobility, because I was, and then I kind of changed the way I sleep. I usually I used to sleep with like one of my legs kind of curled up, and I don't do that anymore. I think that's a piece of it. So I just tried to figure out like what am I? What has become normal and how do I try to change that normal? But it was like that in business Again, it's really easy to feel like the things that you're doing aren't working and then all of a sudden everything feels like it is working. It's not nothing changed. You probably did the same thing. It just you turn the corner. It's not necessarily anything you did. You just maybe did it for long enough or you did it the right way, the right time it's weird.

Kevin Palmieri

When you look back on a year, it's easy to see mistakes and it's easy to see wins that you don't see in the process of making them because it just seems like, well, today's Wednesday and yesterday was Tuesday, but when you look back you kind of have a 30,000 foot view of how the year went and I think I have the best 30,000 foot view I've ever had, just because it the year went by so fast and it went by so slow. At the same time it felt like it was dragging but also felt like I can't believe it's the end of the year already, which is wild, and there's so many lessons, but I also probably forgot so many things. It's weird. It's a weird thing, but I think holistically this is probably the most successful year I've ever had. I would say For sure. Holistically, that feels good.

Kevin Palmieri

Next level nation. What is happening? If you've thought to yourself, I want to try coaching, but you don't really know where to start, group coaching would be a wonderful place for you. That's really why we created it in the first place. We start a new round every 90 days. So if you're hearing this, go to the website nextleveluniversecom and we have the landing page where you can actually hold your spot right now. Even if there's a group going on right now, you can still lock your spot for the next one. The biggest thing that we've seen is, as we get closer and closer to the date, unfortunately, some people end up missing. The group fills up and they can't do it, and then they end up regretting that. So please head over to the website. The link will be in the show notes and we would love to see you there 2004, uh, 2004,.

Alan Lazaros

2024 was holistically the most challenging year by choice I've ever had. Goal-oriented challenge. I've had harder years that were outside my control, but this was the hardest career by choice trying to achieve your goals year. There was something that I really wanted to say earlier that I think was super important.

Kevin Palmieri

We also need your third lesson. I believe you're only two lessons in.

Alan Lazaros

I think that's going to bring it. What were you talking about before this?

Kevin Palmieri

So many things Legs, things turning around. 30,000 foot view wins, losses, reflection.

Alan Lazaros

Oh, got it. The best metaphor I've ever heard for things turning around and you mentioning how it takes a while sometimes for them to. You might be doing the same thing over and all of a sudden it starts to turn the turn the other way. I guess, for lack of a better phrasing, it's like the titanic it takes a while to turn that thing, apparently based on the film. How dare you? What did you say?

Kevin Palmieri

I said how dare you? Why, too soon. I'm kidding okay 110 years ago, 112 years ago. It's been a long time.

Alan Lazaros

No, no it's either way, I was playful with the film, but okay. So the best metaphor is an ice cube on the counter and it's 28 degrees and then 29, and then 30, and then 31, and then 32. And the ice cube doesn't start to melt until 33. This is in Atomic Habits by James Clear. It's a really good metaphor, for when you start doing something, the room is heating, but there's nothing happening to the ice cube yet. And it's not the turn from 32 to 33 that made the difference, it's the. It's all of the accumulated potential that then unlocked it. And then, all of a sudden, something started happening.

Alan Lazaros

What would be my third lesson, 2024. So the first one was smarter versus harder and how you need to work hard in order to work smart. The second one was frustration is actually a good thing if you handle it well, and expressing frustration is the first step to improvement. What are you frustrated with about yourself? Ah, I keep skipping the gym. Okay, well, why? Let's get curious. And then the third one okay, the third one would be everyone has a core wound, but it's different. Everyone's afraid, but they're afraid of different things, and everyone is unintentionally triggering everyone else. That's become very interesting on book club. It's become sort of a think tank. So shout out to anyone in book club it it's become sort of a think tank. So shout out to anyone in book club.

Alan Lazaros

I think we had like 13 people last time and we've been talking about fears. Everyone's afraid of something, but not everyone's afraid of the same thing. So some people struggle with looking less than to others, looking like a failure being perceived as a failure Other people struggle with. So I had to. I'll give an example. So on the last episode I talked about how amazed I was and how I was celebrating Emilia for having a six-figure business and I was celebrating her and I had to go downstairs after that and I had to say, sweetheart, I'm sorry, I got caught up in the moment and I wanted to celebrate you and I'm so proud of you and I didn't realize that you might not have wanted me to share that. And she listened to the episode and we're good, like she said no, it's okay, I appreciate it and but she is more fearful of shining than she is of looking bad. She unconsciously doesn't want to share all of how awesome she is.

Alan Lazaros

She did a speech this year and she I helped her with the bio and the bio is basically just you're amazing, you're amazing, you're amazing, you're amazing. It's like unreal, it's on, it's unreal. I mean she, her achievements at 30 is it's unreal. Never seen anything like it. And she's.

Alan Lazaros

She said that was the most insecure I've been all year. It's just listening to her client, john, who she would give a virtual speech in front of 75 people I think it was actually 150. I think it was supposed to be 75, but it was more than that and it was. The bio was an introduction and he was supposed to read the little one that she catered to make it kind of impressive but not too impressive. And he read the big one and it was all of her accolades and she said that was the most uncomfortable I think I've ever been and I've been working with her on this and I understand too, because even on the last episode I had a really hard time sharing my straight a's and president bush and all that it's.

Alan Lazaros

It's really scary for some people to stand out and it's really scary for other people to feel less than and we. There's some people who are afraid of success, some people are afraid of failure and they trigger each other. Because if you're insecure about being less than and I'm insecure about being more than you might puff up to pretend you're better than you are, and I might dim down to pretend I'm worse than I am, and then that might manufacture an inauthentic relationship and then eventually the truth's going to come out and it's just going to hurt everybody. So everybody's hurting each other, unintentionally. It's really. That's become very clear, especially in the relationship talks, coaching I mean the yin and yang of that is almost always the case and they're just hurting each other without meaning to because they have different core wounds and different deep fears.

Kevin Palmieri

Yeah, isn't it? It's. So it sounds like such an obvious thing for a podcast that has almost 2,000 episodes on self-improvement that what you're afraid of today is most likely the thing that you've been afraid of your entire life, or the thing that has affected you the most your entire life. And then it's almost like well, it affected me in the past, so if I avoid it and keep avoiding it, it'll never affect me again, but actually it'll affect you forever if you keep avoiding it. Yeah, it seems so obvious when you put it that way, but when you're in it it's. It's like one of those things that seems impossible. It's like, well, this is my deepest fear.

Alan Lazaros

Can you give a practical example?

Kevin Palmieri

Yeah, going. Let's say you're, I'll use myself. Let's say I go up to a group of girls when I'm young and I say, hey, I think you're beautiful, I'd love to get your number. And then one of them says, oh, I would never date someone like you, you're short, so that is just going to be my cycle for the rest of my life. Well, nobody would ever want to date me because I'm short. And then I, well, I'm never going to find someone. And then, if I do ever find someone, I'll find a way to sabotage it because I don't think I'm good enough, because I'm shorter than that person. And that becomes your thing, that becomes your self-fulfilling prophecy.

Kevin Palmieri

Unfortunately, if you are somebody out there who every time you shined growing up, you were good at sports, you were good in school, you knew words other people didn't know and every time you would unintentionally flex flex probably isn't the best word, but you would unintentionally shine you got pulled down. Now you think shining is bad and not shining is good. So maybe you're afraid of success. If you got left behind, if you weren't smart, if you didn't feel smart enough, if you didn't feel good enough, if you didn't feel enough, you probably won't put yourself out there because you don't feel like you're capable of succeeding there. So you'll play small, even though you need to play a little bit bigger in order to get self-belief and self-worth. It's that. It's just that the thing that harmed you the most is now the thing that you avoid, but you got the negative side of the thing that harmed you. There's a positive side too. You just need to be willing to look at the negative side in order to actually get the positive side, and there's no positive to, without negative in anything.

Alan Lazaros

That's so obvious. Now, yeah, like I remember one time emilia said something on the conscious couples podcast and I had the moment I was like, oh, you're too attractive to say that. You can't say that you're too hot, and I obviously I think so she's gorgeous. But like no one can be okay with you saying that in a way and I don't know if I'm explaining this well, but I realize that I unintentionally do that all the time and I and I but I grew up not attractive and like not sought after, so I didn't know. It's such an interesting thing and and it's like when someone is okay, like chris hemsworth, let's just use him.

Alan Lazaros

Dude's a stud, the ultimate stud okay he can't, he's not allowed to go anywhere near how studly he is. He can't talk about it, he's just not allowed. You know what I mean? Because it's just like how could you're too arrogant? It's like, well, you know it. And what if he worked really hard for that? Obviously he did to some extent right, he's jacked. But you just what if he grew up without any studliness whatsoever? And what if what he is now is like blowing his own mind? And what if he doesn't know that he's not allowed to?

Kevin Palmieri

you know what I mean. It's so weird, yeah, isn't it weird, how you're not allowed to say something about yourself that other people will say about you privately, isn't that weird?

Alan Lazaros

Yes.

Kevin Palmieri

Like you're not allowed to, that is a very strange thing, I know. But Like you're not allowed to, that is a very strange thing, I know.

Alan Lazaros

But I think it's just that people think it's arrogant.

Kevin Palmieri

I think that's all it is. It's just yeah. You know, I don't, I don't know. I feel like, when you say stuff like that, like I can see it, I can imagine how it would make. Can you give me an example? What did Emilia say? Do you remember what she said?

Alan Lazaros

I don't remember. It was just one of those moments. It was one of the first times I ever felt that way, where I was like, oh, I know what Kev's talking about.

Kevin Palmieri

She's not allowed to say that yeah, I don't know if I have a good example, but yeah, it's just stuff like that, I don't. It's like when you, when you, when you talk negatively about something that would seem so positive to somebody who would trade places with it Because they don't know the downside. Give me an example. If you ever complain about being tall Like dude, fuck you. But not really. But I could see how somebody would say oh yeah, it must be so hard. Yeah, it must be so hard to be tall.

Alan Lazaros

I used to say this way back. I used to say the loneliest girl in the bar is the most attractive one.

Kevin Palmieri

I never would have believed that until you and I interviewed and became friends and we had some acquaintances that were very attractive humans Like, statistically, you know, cheerleaders for professional sporting teams and all that and most of them were wildly insecure. And again, I'm not making that wrong. I think it's this. I was going to do a post about this. I was thinking about this last night. Some of the things that I have been called an expert in the most are the things that I have the most self-doubt in. Like, if you really think about that, the things that people assume I'm like the most confident in are probably the things that I have the most doubt in, because I know they think I'm way more confident than I probably am and I think that is like a thing that plagues almost everyone yeah if you're known to be like beautiful, like, oh yeah, everybody knows that person is beautiful.

Kevin Palmieri

I got to imagine that's gonna fuck with you in some way and I, yeah, coached people that are famous Again, even saying this stuff, it's like famous professional sports cheerleaders.

Alan Lazaros

I didn't coach her, but close. I've been on local access television a couple times the literally you know, one of my clients pretty famous model. My point of all that is it's so different than you'd think. It's so different than you'd think. What is the lesson in that?

Kevin Palmieri

everything is though exactly everything is everything is so much different than you think.

Alan Lazaros

This, this client I'm referring to, who's a pretty famous model for lack of better phrasing, I don't know how else to phrase it and she has a really, really hard time with friends that are girls and I didn't. I I was like, of course, and she's like well, what do you mean? And it's I said well, it's going to be very hard for you to be around people that you don't trigger because they're very insecure about their looks. She's like well, I'm insecure about my looks. I said, I know, but they don't know that. And, by the way, you're not acting that way, right?

The ice cube metaphor for progress

Alan Lazaros

One thing that's very clear, and this will be my last lesson I think I'm giving a bonus lesson here. Bonus everyone's insecure, everyone. It's the same as the third lesson yeah, everyone's insecure. They're just insecure about different things. Yeah, and the thing that you think they're not insecure about you could be totally wrong. You might be totally wrong. They might actually be the most insecure about that thing, which might be why they're, uh, flexing or flaunting, or whatever. The point is is everyone's insecure, everyone. It's just to what degree and about what?

Kevin Palmieri

Yeah, one of the best ways to camouflage insecurity is to pretend you're confident about it. It's like one of the best ways, because who's going to call you out on it? It's like the opposite of imposter syndrome. Is you just like fake it kind of, but you're always waiting for the other shoe to drop.

Alan Lazaros

And isn't that how you end up getting imposter syndrome? Because you feel like you're?

Kevin Palmieri

not actually it. You try to convince yourself that you don't. That's a big lesson. For me, one of the biggest lessons is everything is different than it seems. I just feel like I don't know. Maybe people don't tell you what's different, I don't know, but I feel like so many things are different. Everything I experience today is way different than I thought it was going to be. Some things way better, other things not as ideal, and then some things just different, not better, worse, positive, negative. It's just different than I expected. But I think that's important Because, again, nothing that happened this year fixed me Other than doing the work that I didn't want to do.

Kevin Palmieri

We made more money, cool, awesome, great, cool. It's great for the bank account, good for the business. It's not going to fix me. Big clients, cool, big opportunities Awesome, great. Didn't fix anything, if anything. I think it highlights the stuff that you haven't looked at yet. So that would be like the big lesson and the big takeaway, for didn't fix anything, if anything. I think it highlights the stuff that you haven't looked at yet.

Kevin Palmieri

So that would be like the big lesson and the big takeaway for me is maybe you didn't have the best successful or the most successful year financially that you ever had. Maybe you didn't meet the person that you wanted to meet. Maybe you're not in the best shape you've ever been, but if you really did work on you and so much of it is invisible and I Maybe you're not in the best shape you've ever been, but if you really did work on you and so much of it is invisible and I bet you a bunch of it hasn't even bubbled to the surface yet you probably had a way more successful year than you realize. Just like maybe you made the most money you've ever made. Maybe you found someone you think is your dream partner. Maybe you're in the best shape of your life, but you didn't work on yourself at all. I find it very hard to believe you would accomplish all those if you didn't work on yourself. But you can.

Alan Lazaros

But it's not sustainable. Yeah and or and or. It's not who you really are, it's not true self. I said this to a client earlier and I forget the context of the conversation, but it was talking about the episode we did yesterday where I was talking about corporate and all that stuff and I said I could have been externally successful for sure without working on my core wound, my core insecurities, all that stuff, but I would have had to like I couldn't have done it and be fulfilled. If you want to be successful externally and fulfilled internally, you have to work on your actual insecurities, because that's the only way you can be truly who you are.

Alan Lazaros

We were talking in book club about sincerity and authenticity and two of the members of book club have been in book club for a long time, probably years at this point, and I said I was. I was um, um, true or false. I was a little less authentic back then. I was more, less engineer, less engineer. I was hiding it unconsciously. And they said, oh for sure. And I said why didn't you dislike me? Because they can't stand inauthentic people. And they said sincerity so sincere, like your desire and intentions to help, it just shines through any inauthenticness, if that's a word and I said oh interesting, I I would identify as sincere as hell for sure that doesn't mean that I'm fully authentic.

Alan Lazaros

Fully authentic means I'm fully in all of who I am, and I think that that scares the hell out of me. But I would say my sincere interest to help people grow, I mean, holy shit for sure that's 10 out of 10. And so the point of this for anyone out there watching or listening is, until you work on your insecurities, you're not going to be able to be fully authentic, even if you are sincerely trying. And I feel like I'm more authentic than I've ever been and I also feel like that's been really wonderful in many ways and also really hard in others, because I feel very misunderstood by many people, unfortunately well, and this is hard too.

Kevin Palmieri

It's hard to do an episode every day when you're growing and the person I am today is not the person I was a year ago. That's just the truth, for better or for worse. I believe it's for better because that's that's the work that I'm doing and directing it towards, but it doesn't mean everybody will think it's better. That's the hard part. That's really challenging. I think it depends on the person. Again, I was writing a song the other day and I one of the the second verses I started with I wonder what the old me would think of the new me. I really do. I really wonder what old kevin would think of new kevin. I don't know. I was wildly insecure. I felt not good enough, not smart enough. I don't know. I don't know if he would like me. I genuinely don't know. I like to think he would, but you gotta figure he would know.

Alan Lazaros

I mean a lot of people like you. You're not an unlikable guy. Why would you not like you?

Kevin Palmieri

I don't know. I don't know I'm not saying I wouldn't, I don't know. I think it's a very interesting exercise. I think it's a very interesting exercise because, if so, why? If not, why? And then maybe we'll save that for a different episode.

Alan Lazaros

I'll be a, we could do a full episode, that would be fire all right, old you like new you?

Kevin Palmieri

what would old you look?

Kevin Palmieri

up to new you yeah, what would old you? What would old you think of new you? That's fire. And then, what is what is new you think of old you? We'll do it. We'll do that. We'll do that for an episode, all right.

Kevin Palmieri

Next level nation we are excited to announce and we've been doing stuff behind the scenes and the ball is already rolling. We tend to try to move very quickly. April 5th 2025, we are having next level live 2025, appropriately named. This is going to be the first year where we do a totally virtual event, so we're not selling in-person tickets. We are going to rent out a room and it's going to be myself, alan and Amy, and we are going to live stream the entire thing, like we did last year, except there's going to be no in-person audience. So do I know what we're talking about yet? No, do I know the exact time frame? It's going to be the fifth. I believe it's going to be from 10 am until 4 or 4.30 pm. There will be a replay, so we are going to record the entire thing.

Kevin Palmieri

For anybody who can't make it for the live one, or say you come to the live one and you have to skedaddle out, we'll make sure that everybody who signs up can get a replay of it Super excited. It's going to be weird because it's totally virtual. We're flying Amy in, so that's going to be wonderful. But yeah, there's nothing you can do yet. You can't purchase tickets or anything. We'll have the website up and running in the next week or two. We'll have the website up and running in the next week or two, depending on how long it takes, but I just wanted to throw it out there. That way we have awareness. But it's a totally virtual event anywhere in the world, no matter where you are. It's going to be through Zoom.

Preview of Next Level Live 2025

Alan Lazaros

So, yeah, I'm excited, very excited for this Level up your life, love, health and wealth, and it's going to be, like he said, a full day, and it's going to for those of you who went last year, it will be that, but significantly improved, as we obviously have grown a ton since then. It's going to be everything kevin and I have learned the very best of what we've learned, condensed into a tangible, implementable, digestible, full day of transformation, and I think it'll be a condensation of everything we've learned over the last eight years into the very best of it, and there's no way you don't leave that day floating, going holy crap. I'm gonna create a bigger, better, brighter future, and I really do believe and I know the people who went to next level live. Last year, both in person and virtually felt that way, and it's going to be super affordable as well. So we'll let you all know that when the website's ready.

Kevin Palmieri

Yes, it's going to be 47 biscuits. 47 United States of America biscuits is the price, $47 is what we're going with. I am hungry as well. I'm going to have turkey kielbasa and rice tonight, nice.

Alan Lazaros

I actually don't know your. I'm hungry as well.

Kevin Palmieri

I'm going to have turkey kielbasa and rice tonight.

Alan Lazaros

Nice, I actually don't know the diet starts tonight. You mean he's doing the stuff today Before we go. Group coaching is launching January 7th, tuesday, january 7th. So the website is up. Click the link in the show notes. If you're a podcaster, this is going to be level up yourself, level up your podcast, level up your business. It's going to be all the self-improvement stuff. It's going to be how to create a brand, how to create a community, how to create a podcast, how to start, grow, scale, monetize your podcast and then build a real brand and a real business underneath that, where you generate actual revenue.

Alan Lazaros

Everything soup to nuts yes, I said that, kev, soup to nuts from the beginning to the end of how to level up yourself, your podcast and your business and grow a community online of like-minded people. Passion, purpose, profit, you name it, and it's going to be wildly affordable. So it's $138 per month, three-month program, 12 sessions. It comes to less than with the promo code, less than $25 per session, which is a bargain, as Kevin would say, at half the price, A bargain at twice the price.

Kevin Palmieri

Yes, it's definitely a bargain at half the price, but it's a bargain at twice the price.

Alan Lazaros

also, it's a bargain at twice the price. The promo code is NLULISTENER. All one word, capital or not, it will bring it to 97 biscuits 96 biscuits and 60 mini biscuits.

Kevin Palmieri

$96.60 is what it'll be Times three, three months. $96.60 is what it'll be Times three, Three months. But again, you know, I was talking to Amy today and we were talking about group coaching and I don't know any other place where you're going to get $25, you're going to get a call for $25 with the amount of value that we're going to pour in. So, yeah, there's no way. So if you're interested, we'll have the link in the show notes for that. We appreciate it.

Outro

Kevin Palmieri

If you're not subscribed, you want to subscribe? Please do. It helps us help more people and maybe it'll be a gentle kick in the butt next time you wake up and you don't want to do your 20 minutes of self-improvement but you get a little notification that says NLU just dropped another episode. So because it helps us grow, and when we grow we can help other people grow. So we appreciate you for helping us grow. As always, we love you, Excuse me. We appreciate you, Grateful for each and every one of you. And at NLU we don't have fans, we have family. We will talk to you all tomorrow.

Alan Lazaros

Stay focused.

Kevin Palmieri

Next Level Nation. Thanks for joining us for another episode of Next Level University. We love connecting with the Next Level family.

Alan Lazaros

We mean it when we say family. If you ever need anything, please reach out to us directly. Everything you need to get a hold of us is in the show notes.

Kevin Palmieri

Thank you again and we will talk to you tomorrow.

Head Shot

Alan Lazaros

Host
Head Shot

Kevin Palmieri

Host