Next Level University

WHY Do You Like The Content You Like? (1960)

• Kevin Palmieri and Alan Lazaros

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In this episode, Kevin and Alan discuss the pressure to appear perfect, the realities of building a podcast, and why they choose honesty over shortcuts. They also open up about their struggles, what makes their approach different, and how curated content can affect how we see ourselves. If you’ve ever felt like the world values perfection more than progress, this conversation will give you a new perspective.

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NLU is not just a podcast; it’s a gateway to a wealth of resources designed to help you achieve your goals and dreams. From our Next Level Dreamliner to our Group Coaching, we offer a variety of tools and communities to support your personal development journey.

For more information, please check out our website at the link below. 👇

Website 💻  http://www.nextleveluniverse.com

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We love connecting with you guys! Reach out on Instagram, Facebook, or via email. We’re here to support you in your personal and professional development journey.

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Alan: https://www.linkedin.com/in/alanlazarosllc/

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Show notes:
(5:51) Why do we resonate with certain content
(8:29) Owning struggles while striving
(15:08) Building a podcast from scratch
(20:53) The truth about curated content
(24:44) Honesty as a tool for connection
(27:01) Next Level Dreamliner: the planner, agenda, journal, and habit tracker to rule them all. Get a copy: https://a.co/d/9fPpxEt
(33:45) Success, integrity, and authenticity
(42:19) The dangers of shortcuts in life
(49:08) Outro

Send a text to Kevin and Alan!

🎙️ Hosted by Kevin Palmieri and Alan Lazaros

Next Level University is a top-ranked daily podcast for dream chasers and self-improvement lovers. With over 2,100 episodes, we help you level up in life, love, health, and wealth one day at a time. Subscribe for real, honest, no-fluff growth every single day.

Kevin Palmieri

Succeeding is so hard. Becoming the version of you that you want to be and doing something that you love and making it profitable, and building a team, and all that Staying power and staying consistent All that is so freaking hard. I can understand the allure of wanting to take a shortcut, for sure.

Alan Lazaros

So I'm talking to him about it one on one. You already know this. That's why I can say it. You are barely scratching what you know you can do. He's like fuck, I know, but I would never say that to someone who's already put it all on the court. I mean, I knew he was being lazy and he knows it too. That's why I can say it. So there's also context of the room as well, and I just think social media and podcasting it's very hard to get the truth in these mediums.

Kevin Palmieri

Welcome to Next Level University. I'm your host.

Alan Lazaros

Kevin Palmieri, and I'm your co-host, alan Lazarus.

Kevin Palmieri

At NLU, we believe in a heart-driven but no BS approach to holistic self-improvement for dream chasers.

Alan Lazaros

Our goal with every episode is to help you level up your life, love health and wealth.

Kevin Palmieri

We bring you a new episode every single day on topics like confidence, self-belief, self-worth, self-awareness, relationships, boundaries, consistency, habits and defining your own unique version of success Self-improvement in your pocket, every day, from anywhere, completely free.

Kevin Palmieri

Welcome to Next Level University, next Level Nation. Welcome back to another episode of Next Level University, where we help you level up your life, your love, your health and your wealth. Today, for episode number 1960, 1960, the year I was born. Why and I wasn't really, but I like to say stuff like that why do you like the content that you like? I feel like people would consider that a dad joke. Alan and I are together when we're together. We're never together anymore, but we'd go to get coffee together, maybe a couple of donies back in the day, and the person would say 1956. And I'd say, ah, the year I was born. And I would say it, no matter what, it doesn't matter if it was 12, 18. Ah, the year I was born. And nobody, ever. No response, ever from anybody. Never got anything, not even a chuckle.

Alan Lazaros

Yeah, it's not a good joke.

Kevin Palmieri

I think that's a dad joke 101. Okay, so Alan and I were talking before this and I don't really know how to preface it. I can imagine somebody who tunes into this podcast for the first time and hears Alan recording late on a Friday night having a giggle fest and Alan saying I look like shit and me saying dude, you do look like shit. Yeah, do you really do? Thinking of a variety of different things, and since the very beginning of this, our goal was always to document our journey, talk about our experiences and share them with the community. That was always our goal. That's been our goal since the very beginning. We wanted it to be a fly you're a fly on the wall of a philosophical conversation between friends.

Alan Lazaros

Essentially, Whoa, whoa, whoa. Change the way you think, change the way you act, change the way you live. The Hyperconscious Podcast to help raise people's awareness of themselves, others and the world through being a fly on the wall. Deep conversations about personal growth and personal development.

Kevin Palmieri

Yeah, but that's a mouthful, so much to say what.

Alan Lazaros

I said was smooth.

Kevin Palmieri

I have a cat hair in my mouth.

Alan Lazaros

I think Real quick oh for fuck's sake, because we've been leaning into some of these funny tangents. Yeah, you said, dad joke. And I thought about a time in my life where there was a woman who said that. I said what do you think of my haircut? You don't like my haircut. She said it looks a little. It's a little dilfy, dilfy. It's a little dilfy. You know what dilf means.

Kevin Palmieri

If it has. If it's, yeah, it's probably milf, but with a D, yeah.

Alan Lazaros

Dilfy. I was like what does that mean? She's like just a little Dilfie. Who was this person? A little side tangent. Don't tell me An ex.

Kevin Palmieri

An ex.

Alan Lazaros

Mm-hmm, what's the?

Kevin Palmieri

difference between Dilfie and just saying you look attractive in it. They're just saying you look old. I think she was making fun of me. Definitely was yeah, but why?

Alan Lazaros

That's what I'm saying. It's quite a backhanded compliment. Definitely I got a lot of those. Yeah, you did, and I remember thinking so do you like it or you don't like it?

Kevin Palmieri

That's. I mean, you know, that's what you think spitting game is. You think that's like the way right there, it's like, oh, let me, I'm going to give this person like kind of a compliment. That's like the way right there it's like, oh, let me, I'm going to, I'm going to give this person like kind of a compliment, but they're not going to know if it's a compliment or not, and they're going to be thinking about me for the rest of the day. That's what happened. You're still talking about it. I'm still talking.

Alan Lazaros

The person. The person left the work. No, I'm on to her.

Kevin Palmieri

I know what she was doing. Now, what if the reason you like the content you like, the reason you like the content that you like, is because it seems like those people have it all figured out and it seems like they don't deal with any of the stuff that you deal with? And what if, hypothetically right, we're going to play the theoretic game? What if, hypothetically, they actually don't understand you because they don't seem to struggle with any of the things that you struggle with? Would you so if you were to say I resonate with this content for blank reason, would it be I resonate with this content because it seems like they have it all figured out and they can help me figure it out. I resonate with this content because they're vulnerable and relatable and I feel like they connect to what I'm going through. I think if we had buckets for why we resonated with certain content, we'd be way more successful. That's my thesis.

Alan Lazaros

I want to give everyone the origin of why this happened. Mine wasn't good enough, huh, no, no, that's not what it is, I'm adding to it. And yours was wildly inadequate. It was all over the place. Honestly, it was. I can open my window.

Kevin Palmieri

Because it's about 200 degrees in here.

Alan Lazaros

Alright, sounds good. And you're in a sweatshirt and you're in like a jacket. Well, I it's.

Kevin Palmieri

I've already been outside today. I know you probably haven't. What time did you get up today? You recorded an episode before this, you probably.

Alan Lazaros

You know it, I was up at 9, son. It's 2 degrees this morning in new hampshire. Yeah, it's not so, it's not nice, but the office is really spring's coming man. I'm telling you, it's on its way okay, don't look, hey, don't look at my butt that's if you're on.

Kevin Palmieri

If you're on youtube, don't look at my butt, look away that's a good way.

Alan Lazaros

That's a good way to get everybody to look at your butt. It's a strong hook. Okay, this is something that in the past, I would have been too scared to share. There's a book called the Biology of Belief and a man by the name of Bruce Lipton, who I respect his work, the Biology of Belief. I do recommend you read it. It's, I think, very valuable and it talks about how much your beliefs shape your health.

Alan Lazaros

The Biology of Belief. That's what you'd think. As a matter of fact, way, way, way back in the day, we read this in book club. We did. Your wife Taryn was there.

Alan Lazaros

Now, this is how my brain actually works and I hope that I don't get villainized for this, but if I do, it is what it is. I got to be honest. I hear an interview with Bruce talking about the biology of belief and there's this part of me in my mind that is listening to this man talk about biology and how you literally, with your beliefs, can change your physiology and biology and be healthier and you can live longer and all this stuff. And there's this part of me that is looking at him and again scared to share this. He doesn't look well, he's not in shape. And there's this little part of me that is wondering if you're such an expert at this topic of believing in yourself, and believing so much, in fact, that it changes your biology, why aren't you more well and vibrant? And with you and me, we're not well and vibrant and we know why. We're grinding and we own it and we just say, yeah, like last night.

Alan Lazaros

It was a long day at 10 back to. I didn't actually yesterday, that was the day before, but it's been a long week and I had a speech the day before, blah, blah, but we were recording late. Was this last night or the night before?

Owning struggles while striving

Kevin Palmieri

I honestly don't remember this was last night. It just meshes together.

Alan Lazaros

Yeah, and I said openly on the podcast. I said I look like shit and I meant it. Now I'm not trying to be self-deprecating. What I'm saying is I need to take better care of myself. And lately I've been perusing the self-improvement space Some of the bigger podcasters. Now imagine being a podcaster, building a self-improvement podcast, and then you listen to the people at the top of this industry and you watch their podcast and you sit there and go.

Alan Lazaros

Kevin and I are so different and I'm sitting there going is that good, is that bad? We don't really know how to be any different than we are. It's not like we want to do it their way. And I came to this realization that these people, whether and again, just think of Mel Robbins, joe Rogan, tony Robbins, jordan Peterson, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah blah, ed Milet, whatever. Big names, big names, big names. Why are we so different?

Alan Lazaros

And I've been thinking about this and contemplating this and Kevin and I have a really hard time talking from a place of already having arrived. Yeah, we'll talk at times about where we are now. Yeah, we'll talk at times about what we used to suck at. Yeah, well, but here's the thing that I don't see a lot of you and I talk about where we currently suck a lot. We talk about where we are currently inadequate. We and we talk not from a place of having arrived, and I don't know if it's because we're younger or if we're onto something that these people aren't. My only goal is to help the person on the other end of this. Seriously, this is everything I'm saying right now is to try to help the person on the other end improve themselves and improve their lives, and to me, it doesn't help you unless I say, hey, I'm also sucking really bad at x, y and z still like not before, and now I've overcome it. I'm talking like and here's where I'm actually different Statistically I just think that there's a, there's a lot of whether it's Bruce or whoever there's a lot of talking about their thing and teaching their thing, and I respect the impact they're having.

Alan Lazaros

I think they're doing a lot of good in the world. I'm not taking anything from that. What I am saying, though, is that you and I are doing it very differently. It's almost like you're on the journey with us, you're on the train with us. We haven't arrived yet, and we never will, and we never will. We're always striving and never arriving, and I think social status comes from having quote unquote arrived, but in the real world we're only 36 and 35 we haven't arrived. This is a infinite game, and we're trying to get better each day too, and I think that's what makes us different, and I just want to plant our flag there because I can't I can't ever not talk to you, kev, on this podcast about where I want to improve.

Kevin Palmieri

That was it Done.

Alan Lazaros

I think so.

Kevin Palmieri

That was hard. Sometimes you'll have that and then you'll keep going. So I wanted to make sure I didn't want to say any of that, because I don't like talking about us. So I'm glad Alan did, but yeah, I don't like. I don't know, maybe I'm weird with that.

Alan Lazaros

Do you ever get the feeling when you do watch other content?

Kevin Palmieri

I don't watch any other podcasts by design. Why? Because most of them, most of them, infuriate me. I think you and I did a. Again, I don't Whether you're watching or listening, I don't want you to think this is me pumping our tires, because it's not. There's layers under it. Alan and I stopped having guests at the time where we could have had some of the biggest guests ever for us the opportunity to have very, very, very, very big guests on.

Kevin Palmieri

Now, if you look at the way the guest circuit is happening on podcasts and everybody, just when they have the new book, they go on this podcast. They go on this podcast. They talk about the same shit, essentially, and they promote their book. And again, I think podcasts for big podcasts have become late night television. That's what you do. You go on late night television. You talk about your movie oh, how's the family? Blah, blah, blah. When's the movie coming out? What was the best part? Tell us some sauce on it. Some tell us some some sauce on it.

Kevin Palmieri

And I just think now. I think what has happened is somebody makes a name for themselves, even if them making a name for themselves is not based on facts or truth. Then the way to grow your podcast is to get big guests, so you go have this person on, even if they don't know anything and none of what they talk about is scientifically proven or vetted. I shared something in my story yesterday about somebody was sharing how vegetables are terrible for you and they're what's killing you. That is not true. It's not true.

Alan Lazaros

But this person will go—. Can you share the story about the woman who said I made $300,000 a year?

Kevin Palmieri

but I never used social media.

Alan Lazaros

Can you go into that?

Kevin Palmieri

Yeah, Anonymously of course, somebody I follow and she seems like she does really well in the world. She has positive content. It's not on the high end of what seems like scamism, but she put a post up the other day that said I make $300,000 a year. I work one hour a day. I don't use social media at all and I'm doing a master class to teach you how to do it. It was posted on social media and it was a paid ad. So you're quite literally using this on social media and I think she has like 3,500 posts. So she's essentially posted every day for the last 10 years. Wait, let me get the numbers on that.

Kevin Palmieri

Well, 3,650 would be every day.

Alan Lazaros

Yeah, that's every day for the last 10 years.

Kevin Palmieri

I think it was either 2,500 or 3,500. She has posted every day for the last handful of years at least.

Alan Lazaros

Yeah, at least five, if not ten, right, at least. And she's saying she created a $3,000 business. That's how you build the audience.

Kevin Palmieri

Now this is what we were kind of talking about in yesterday's episode. What I do today for the podcast is different than what I did for the podcast eight years ago. We have an amazing team and we have a business and we make revenue. We record the episode, we throw it in Google Drive and the team does all the amazing stuff that they do. In the beginning I did all the audio editing. I did all the video editing.

Alan Lazaros

I made the clips, I did the branding. It was actually me personally, I did it.

Kevin Palmieri

Yeah, Alan did all of it.

Alan Lazaros

No, I didn't do any of it man In the beginning. Kev used to say the talent has arrived. Yeah, alan would just show up, but I did all that in the beginning.

Kevin Palmieri

So imagine if I ran an ad on here here's how to do almost no work and get really good podcast results. It's like, well, no, it doesn't really work that way.

Alan Lazaros

Without doing a lick of audio or video editing. Well, you can if you pay someone. Yeah, yeah.

Kevin Palmieri

Right, but most people can't afford to pay someone in the beginning, so that kind of I just. The hard thing for me is I think this person is unintentionally being misleading, because how do you teach somebody how to do something that you have been doing for the last decade and you're going to teach them in a free master class?

Alan Lazaros

They don't have your audience, so it's not going to work the same and you're teaching them how you did it in a way that doesn't include how you actually did it Right. That's the alarming part. Yeah, you're teaching them how you did it in a way that doesn't include how you actually did it, right.

Kevin Palmieri

That's the alarming part. Yeah, you're setting them up for, and that's it's. It's the whole thought of I can eat. Okay, I've been a bodybuilder for 15 years. I could eat pizza every single day and look. Essentially however I wanted, if I was disciplined enough terrible advice to give to somebody who was just starting out in fitness. The worst advice maybe ever of all. Time that same thing. It's very similar.

Alan Lazaros

I was on a podcast earlier with emilia doing conscious couples podcast, and the episode was very simple concept, which is how to improve your relationship, and the way to improve your relationship is to improve yourself. And Candid, live on the conscious couples couch. I'm sitting there and I'm like Emilia Sweetheart, what, what's one thing that you think would improve our relationship, if you that you need to improve? It's like what do you need to improve, right? Not me? Uh, and of course, I answered it right after I'm being joke.

Alan Lazaros

I'm joking, but I was being playful and she went into this whole thing of all the stuff she needs to improve and I I had this moment of why don't other podcasters do that? Like, why aren't they showing up saying I'm really sucking here, here and here they're always. I'm telling you, they go from this place of where I used to be, where I am now and how I got there. That's what it is what I used to be, where I am now and how I got there and I get why. It's the hero's journey. It's almost like they're unconsciously avoiding status hits. Last night you and I were laughing at me, at how silly and stupid and how bad I was at speaking, and after that episode, I had this moment of why doesn't anyone else do that?

Kevin Palmieri

Well it might make for a terrible listening experience.

Kevin Palmieri

I mean, that could be a piece of I don't know I think it's more honest I, I think I bet you our listeners probably enjoy when we are honest about that stuff, like not everyone's 100 all the time, but yet I think most people are acting like they are well, I think most, I think most things now are almost treated like a movie, where it's one take, not one take, it's a million takes to get one and you only use the best cuts. I think almost everything is that way.

Kevin Palmieri

If you think about it, that's nothing like real life, I know, but I feel like going back to why we're talking about what we're talking about today. If you resonate with content that is completely the opposite of your real life, I think it's worth exploring, because if that's the only reason you resonate with it, it doesn't mean it's going to be helpful. It doesn't mean, like some of the, some of the people who are in the best shape, give the worst fitness advice.

Alan Lazaros

I saw a video yesterday that was really hard for me. It was someone we know from our past in in their you know, $80,000 Range Rover or whatever it is, and and putting on makeup while talking, and I actually really adore this person as a person in real life. It's just a very interesting thing to study. Because what do I want to say here? I don't want to come off as negative, but I want to be honest. It's so hard to like oh, are you guys negative? Listen, this person is curating every word. Every fucking word is curated. Every shot, every take, every, every single fucking thing is curated.

Alan Lazaros

I've been in this person's home and, trust me, the backdrop that she records in looks pristine and gorgeous, and behind the scenes it's an absolute shit show. I need to be the guy who owns like. You're not the only one with a messy bathroom, people Anyone out there watching or listening. You're not the only one with shit in your basement. My basement is full of stuff. We still need to clean it out. My garage has junk. We have a donation pile that's getting huge. It might as well be a goddamn mountain we can climb Right. I just it's really important for people to understand. Everything online is so goddamn curated, we're losing sight of real life and the truth is, happiness and fulfillment is in real fucking life, and I get why that is. But it's very important for us to lean into the truth of, and going back to the Conscious Couples podcast episode, emilia asked me I don't even think she asked me. I jumped right into it. After she said all the things she wishes she could do better in our relationship, I went into a list of them. I have a list of things that I need to be doing better, but we're the ones who are supposed to be experts. But the reason we're experts is because we're working on it.

Alan Lazaros

I'm I'm not the best. I'm the best partner for Emilia and I know that, but I have to work at that. Every goddamn day I've been Jeff and lately I've been missing my shifts with the fur babies. I've been killing it in business, crushing it in fitness. My sleep has been off and I've not been as present. I haven't been doing the kitchen as well.

Alan Lazaros

I got to. I have a lot of chores and stuff that I need to. I need to make sure I'm supporting. She's been supporting me most of the time lately. I know that, and I just I'm sitting there on the podcast going, are Kevin and I I'm always up against this thing of like are we too honest for our own good? And I don't know if I care. I think we have to be that because I don't think I can ever I don't think I can ever talk about where I'm. I don't think I can ever not talk about where we're currently sucking. I don't want to get to a place like what are we struggling with now? Right, we're the only podcasters in history to say that we're climbing out of debt. You know that.

Kevin Palmieri

No, there's no way. We are.

Alan Lazaros

Dude, obviously that's an accessory. Yeah, I think it's rare, you never hear these people talk about their debts, though, not until after they're out of them.

Kevin Palmieri

Well, because I think I can imagine, imagine a world where, again, I don't think it. How?

Alan Lazaros

rare do you think it is? Out of 100 podcasters, how many of them do you think talk about how their number one priority in 2025 is to climb out of debt?

Alan Lazaros

I don't know out of how many 100 okay, I think that's high, but and, by the way, one in ten just so, everyone knows, all businesses have debt. That's the. How many businesses out of 100 do you think have debt? A 99, yeah, exactly so, and again, maybe it's not 99. But the point is is, what do you think makes? I know you don't like pumping our tires, but our listeners if you're out there watching or listening, you know something's different here, and I think this is it.

Kevin Palmieri

Well, that's hard for me because I don't know. I just think you and I show up and we do our best to stay us and we want to make sure we add value and we want to be philosophical and we want to have fun. We want this to be fulfilling and anytime it's not, we revisit why it's not, so then things change. I think that maybe going back to the episode that you did for the conscious couples podcast because I think you and I are more focused on the work than we are the front of the scenes that yeah, we do an episode every day and I I feel like we are strong podcasters and we learn a lot and all that, and we don't just show episode every day. And I feel like we are strong podcasters and we learn a lot and all that. We don't just show up here and take it lightly and say whatever happens, happens. We don't do that. But for every hour of podcasting, there's eight hours of work behind the scenes and I think that's different. I don't think most people, I think some people stumble upon it. This is why Because it's you and I's job to get better, it's not necessarily other people's jobs to get better. I don't think it's the same. I don't think it's the same.

Kevin Palmieri

And I can imagine when somebody gets to a place where they're talking to an audience that's way bigger than they ever thought they would get and they haven't worked on the insecurities they can't reveal that stuff. I can imagine, I can understand that. I can empathize with that. I can empathize with that. Imagine if you and I just we got caught up in the we have to look good at all times and we can never take any credibility hits and then eventually we get to the place where we cross a million listens and we have a large audience and then it's like dude, I'm like struggling with stuff, but I know I can't, nobody can know, because we've gone too far. I've already built up this facade. Yeah, that's scary.

Honesty as a tool for connection

Alan Lazaros

I would feel so trapped by that, of course, because yesterday I would feel so trapped by that.

Kevin Palmieri

Of course, because yesterday.

Alan Lazaros

Last night it felt so freeing to laugh.

Kevin Palmieri

You weren't laughing at me.

Alan Lazaros

You were laughing with me and I know that energetically, trust me. I've been laughed at a lot.

Kevin Palmieri

So I know the difference.

Alan Lazaros

Well, we were having fun, we were having fun but afterwards, when I got off, I thought to myself is that bad? Do people think we're less put together because of that, when in reality it's everyone's?

Kevin Palmieri

Well, and I think you and I just don't care that much. I know, honestly, I'm trying to figure out why. Because in real life I actually think I'm more put together in real life than I would ever think if I listened to this podcast. Of course, that's the fun of it. On the podcast it's almost like this is what I said to Alan. I said the podcast is kind of like a behind the scenes where you really get to know what's going on. I'm like sick again. I've been sick three times this year. It's like the fourth week. I don't know what the fuck's going on. It's the worst. I don't understand it. It's very humbling. It sucks. I'm trying to do that more on social media and I'm trying to just I don't know.

Kevin Palmieri

It makes sense to me Real quick, real quick, real quick, just as an example, imagine, if you okay, imagine this, I would bet this has happened. I would bet a large amount of money. This has happened. Imagine there's a podcast that is predominantly about relationships Not 100% about relationships, but predominantly they talk about it a lot. Let's say there's two partners. I would bet money that there have been businesses, podcasts, youtube channels, coaching, membership, certifications, whatever that have been separated and just kept the gig going because that's how they made a living.

Alan Lazaros

I would never do that. I would never do that.

Kevin Palmieri

I'm certain it's happened because it's come out that people have done it.

Alan Lazaros

Why am I different in that I'm actually asking from a place of curiosity, like Emilia, and I would never do that. Our relationship is better behind the scenes than it is on the show.

Kevin Palmieri

By a significant margin.

Alan Lazaros

It makes sense, and I think you and I are better behind the scenes than on the show, and I think that's not true for other podcasters and I don't understand why. I'm trying to actually understand, even in real time. I'm striving, not arriving, yeah.

Kevin Palmieri

I don't know.

Alan Lazaros

I don't know what the answer is. Hello, hello, hello. Nlu listener. Thank you, as always, for listening to Next Level University. Real quick. I just want to jump in and let you know about the Next Level Dreamliner. This is a journal that I use every single day. Achieve your dreams 90 days at a time. It breaks down your dreams into goals, milestones and daily habits. We hope you enjoy it. The link will be in the show notes. I think you and I value authenticity. I think some people talk about it like yeah, the link will be in the show notes.

Kevin Palmieri

We didn't teach money.

Alan Lazaros

We talked about being broke. I remember you talking about your car and all that kind of stuff.

Kevin Palmieri

Yeah, but in fairness, I didn't talk about that at the time.

Alan Lazaros

I didn't talk about it Not long after.

Kevin Palmieri

Well, I don't know. It's hard to talk about stuff. I mean, again the old don't talk about open wounds, talk about scars.

Alan Lazaros

Yeah.

Kevin Palmieri

It depends, obviously, it depends on the open wound, but I wasn't ready to talk about it in 2019. I wasn't ready to talk about how I couldn't get.

Alan Lazaros

If it's a level 10 wound, you don't want to talk about it while you're bleeding.

Kevin Palmieri

Yeah.

Alan Lazaros

But you don't have to wait until you're a billionaire to talk about how you were broke once I think there's such a I've always craved content like this, where people were more. I guess it comes down to just being more honest, I think, where Emilia and I on the podcast, I knew she would have no problem Answering where I think she could improve or where she thinks she could improve in our relationship. And then I had this moment of If someone's listening and hearing all the things she needs to do better or thinks she needs to do better, is that a credit build or a credit hit? Because it's a credit build for me.

Kevin Palmieri

I think it's a, I think it's a credit build. There's a lot of relationship podcasts that do do that. I think relationships are a place, a space that you see that pretty often.

Alan Lazaros

I don't listen to relationship podcasts.

Kevin Palmieri

There's definitely because I've seen clips on social media where they're like really talking about their I mean, they're like doing it live, talking about their problems live. So I think in relationship land that's way more common than maybe other, and maybe it's because there's two people I don't know, but I think there's a lot of big shows that do that. So I would say it's probably a cred build, because I don't think people I think now more than ever people are really starting to resonate more with authenticity than perfection, and we know it's not real.

Alan Lazaros

We know it's not One more tiny example. I know this is me exploring. When I was at the speech, the training, I said I was telling our story and I said where we started and opened with a story birth, father, stepfather, all this stuff. And I showed one slide of you and I now almost 2000 episodes, top 100 show, self-improvement, all this slide, 1 million plus listens, 1 million plus dollars, blah, blah, blah. All this the stuff. And one of the students later on in the training said well, it didn't just start there. Like, when did you cross a million? I said I need to make this as clear as possible. The million is aggregated over the total. We didn't make a million in one year and I had this moment I would anyone else say that? Would anyone else go out of their way to say wait, wait, wait? I need you to know I'm not. We didn't do that this year. Some people, what percentage.

Kevin Palmieri

I don't think it would be the majority.

Alan Lazaros

Right, I don't see a ton of that. I almost. It's almost like I had one mentor in the past who I don't consider a mentor at all anymore, but like I had one mentor in the past who I don't consider a mentor at all anymore, but like I did at the time, who said always err on the high side of perception. I don't think we do that as much as other people. I don't think I do that as much as other people.

Kevin Palmieri

I don't know, I don't know. I don't know Because I think you and I realize that nothing that we do in the public like no matter how good you feel on a podcast, it doesn't mean you're going to feel any better in real life. And I think you and I have experienced that. I took pictures today at the gym and I thought I found like the supreme lighting yesterday and I just couldn't find it today and I was like, oh, that's that? Like yeah, I could probably find a filter to make it look better, but I don't want to do that. That's not what I actually look like. It doesn't serve me to do that. Even the lighting's a little like I look way better in that lighting than I do in regular lighting. But I also don't know what's closer to reality. Like the lighting in the locker room just sucks and I look way better than that. But like the lighting in the locker room just sucks and I look way better than that.

Alan Lazaros

But the the lighting in the ballet room or whatever the hell I'm using. I don't know like. Is that adding something on the side? Well, you need to be the person. Your purpose was to be the person you needed and what if the person you needed wasn't wasn't anyone talking from having arrived, but rather is talking about someone still striving? What if that's the person we needed? What if we are unconsciously the male role models we would have needed, and that's why we?

Success, integrity, and authenticity

Alan Lazaros

well, that's the goal, that's the I don't know, even when I'm 50, 67, I I never intend on. There'd be moments in the training where I would stop the training and I'd say, listen, I got to give it to you real, like boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. And then I'd get back into the training and it's. I had this moment of no one. Why isn't Emilia said this? Like I've never seen a speaker do that? Why, like there's something wrong with that? I shouldn't have to stop the training and then say, hey, listen, let me tell you what it really took and then go back into like teaching again. It's you and I are like those meshed, I think. I think we're those meshed and I think most people are just one or the other and, again, not everybody. Again, kev often is trying to empathize with both sides, which I think is also why we're different, because you and I are so different. But well, yeah, yeah, I would stop the training and shift into this sort of. This is what no one will tell you, but I'm certain that this is true. Let me just give it to you real. And they really appreciated that they.

Alan Lazaros

The feedback I got after was and this was I've never had someone talk to me like that. One of my clients shout out to you. Matt, I know you're listening. He said I've never had anyone talk to me like that, and he said that to his wife. What he meant is no one's ever brought it that real, no one's ever been that honest, and for him he's.

Alan Lazaros

I mean, he's just this amazing semi-genius, really successful, more successful than all of his peers, probably ostracized because of it type of guy where I just was honest, like brother, compared to your potential, like you know you, and here's the thing, you know this. So I'm talking to him about it one on one. I said you already know this. That's why I can say it. You are barely scratching what you know you can do. He's like fuck, I know, but I would never say that to someone who's already put it all on the court. I mean, I knew he was being lazy and he knows it too. That's why I can say say it. So there's also context of the room as well, and I just think social media and podcasting it's very hard to get the truth in these mediums I think, yeah, it's, it is.

Kevin Palmieri

It's very challenging because there is no one answer. There's no one. If there's two people listening, one answer doesn't work there's one person listening.

Alan Lazaros

You can do one answer, but I know you're afraid to pump our tires, but I really want to hear what you think about Like what do you think makes you different as a podcaster.

Kevin Palmieri

I'd rather be honest than successful. I'd rather be more honest and less successful.

Alan Lazaros

And you think other people aren't willing to do that.

Kevin Palmieri

Yeah, yeah, I think Fuck, succeeding is so hard. Becoming the version of you that you want to be and doing something that you love and making it profitable, and building a team, and all that staying power and staying consistent all that is so freaking hard. I can understand the allure of wanting to take a shortcut for sure. I just think that I always think about the fact that there's some things that you can't put back in the bag. When you take them out of the bag, there's certain things Like I can't, I can't edit a photo, because if I edit a photo once, that means I always did that Like I can't do that.

Kevin Palmieri

I don't want to do that. I always did that Like I can't do that. I don't want to do that. I don't that. If I pay for followers, like that's not it. That's not the fucking way for me. I don't here's the thing, because I care more about what I feel of my success than anybody else does that I don't understand how somebody can go buy followers and not feel like shit about themselves. I know, I know Same.

Alan Lazaros

Like this isn't real. I felt so bad. There was a story. I came to Kevin almost crying, saying I was so ashamed. There was someone who reached out to me on Instagram and I fell for it. I was naive, and they said you'll get more reach. I thought it was paid advertising, yeah, and it was just. It was fake, it was all fake. And I came to Kevin I said, dude, I I'm so ashamed, I didn't mean to. I was the last couple of months I've been paying and I thought it was real reach. And I've realized now it's fake, it's all fake and I couldn't live with it. I could have kept going. No one else knew it was fake. I knew, I knew it was fake. I can't, dude, I can't.

Alan Lazaros

You know how many opportunities I had to do steroids when I was a fitness model and all that. Of course, I can't do it because I'll know, no one else will know. Half these athletes are on steroids. I know some of them, but I think they sell out a little. I some of them, but they, I think they sell out a little. I know that they do. That's the truth. I think they do and maybe we all sell out a little bit, but I'm trying really fucking hard not to I I maybe to our detriment and I think that that that's maybe the growth journey. That's something behind the scenes that everyone can. Really you want to know what I really struggle with, that I really struggle with erring on the high side of perception when in reality, I would rather share the reality. Reality is more helpful to everyone. Reality is so much more helpful.

Alan Lazaros

There's a photo that I was reluctant to post because I didn't want the cred hit and I now I have to post it. I it's been eating at me ever since I didn't post it. I wanted to post it cause it was awesome. It was me and the kids and it's less kids in the audience, and I didn't want to post it cause I know it's a cred hit, but I don't care, I have to post it. It's been three days and I can't. It's eating at me every day.

Kevin Palmieri

I think that's so much about the audience. There's a. We'll get out of here because I know we got to go. There's a singer. I don't know how to pronounce her name Kamiya Kabeo, I think, is how you pronounce her name. She was in the Fifth Harmony. It was a band, and there was a picture from one of her recent concerts where it was a small crowd and she's like a big artist. So I don't know what the deal was. I don't know if tickets were too expensive or whatever. Maybe she's fallen off, I don't know. Embarrassing or something.

Kevin Palmieri

And somebody else, another musician, re-shared it and said I just gained so much respect for Kamiya Cabello because there's a lot of artists that would say, oh, I'm sick or I don't feel well, or something came up and canceled the show. I can understand why somebody would see that and say, oh, wow, she fell off. I can understand that. I can see it from that perspective. Somebody who is jealous of her or envious of her said, ha, oh, yeah, you're gonna get what's coming to you. Like, I can see it. I can understand that, but I also do now have more. Here's the truth. This is the truth, for me at least, and then we'll get out of here. Tara and I one time went to Dueling Pianos, went on a date night, went to to a dueling piano show, interesting, interesting show and we were sitting higher up and you can go down and you can donate money and request a song. Every time we go to a place, taryn requests Honky Tonk, badonkadonk. That's her song.

Alan Lazaros

She requests it every time we go somewhere. I didn't know you were going there when they will play that. Yeah, I don't know you were going there when they will play that.

Kevin Palmieri

Yeah, I don't even know if I know that song. You're not missing much. There were these girls and ladies like, dancing in the front, just having the time of their lives, and there was a little piece of me that was villainizing them. Like sit down, sit down, nobody wants to Come on, sit down, nobody wants to see you dance. Like, come on, sit down, control yourselves. And then I had a moment where I was like kev, why don't you shut the fuck up?

Kevin Palmieri

The only reason you're villainizing them or judging them is because you don't have the balls to do it. I don't have the balls to go up there. I would love to have that level of confidence or alcohol poisoning, whichever one that they had. I think that's dude. I wish, I wish and maybe I do know, I don't know I wish I had the confidence to try to sell out a stadium and then have 200 people show up and then me still go out on stage and just fucking give it everything I got. I know you do that that's like a you thing, you wouldn't even. But yeah, yeah, 200 people showed up, that'd be, awesome, I'm not.

Kevin Palmieri

I don't know if I'm there yet Internally, like I can pretend it doesn't bother me, there was only 13 or 14 kids at that training and they wanted 60.

Alan Lazaros

They told me 60 plus and they were very embarrassed and I said, it's all good, I gave it more baby. You and I also have tried to fill rooms. I know, yeah, oh, you thought 60 were coming. I feel, ya, oh yeah.

Kevin Palmieri

I feel ya.

Alan Lazaros

All good, I gave those 14 everything I had, 100%.

Kevin Palmieri

Well, I think that there's something to be said with if you would villainize Kamiya Kabeo. I think Kabeo Kabeo. I don't know how to pronounce her. My apologies for pronouncing it wrong.

Alan Lazaros

I would never villainize that in a million years.

Kevin Palmieri

But is that actually a credit hit?

Alan Lazaros

Yeah, it's a massive credit. It is. Is it 14 kids a credit?

Kevin Palmieri

No, not for me. It wasn't your job to put people in those seats.

Alan Lazaros

Do you think for other people it is? I think, yeah, it is.

Kevin Palmieri

For some? Yeah, for some.

The dangers of shortcuts in life

Alan Lazaros

That's what it is. I would rather be honest and take the credit hit than be dishonest and be seen higher. I don't want to earn respect through falsity same same very last thing in.

Alan Lazaros

In my childhood, there were a few people who who earned respect through lies. Falsity wasn't real. Later on I found out and it was wildly disappointing. I don't want to be a part of that. I don't want to be a part of that. I don't want to pretend I'm always on point speaking. How useless is that to someone out there who wants to be a speaker? Imagine I was on a podcast yesterday. He said oh, don't worry, we'll edit out every um. You know all that stuff and that was a credit hit for me. You don't need to edit all that out. Why don't we just be real? Why can't we just be honest? Do you understand it though? Yeah, I get why it creates a better experience. Quote, unquote all that stuff, but there's a part of me that just said why don't you just get better at speaking?

Kevin Palmieri

It's not that easy, because in the interim you suck. It's just not. I understand it's belief, it's self-belief, it's a belief thing, because I have the same thing. When I go on podcasts and they're like, yeah, if you make a mistake or anything, we'll edit it out, it's like number one, I don't want you to. I don't want you to. I don't think I'm gonna make a mistake in terms of like a noticeable one. I'll make an internal mistake for sure, like what the fuck is that word I wanna say?

Kevin Palmieri

and I'll like, just tell a story for a little bit longer. It's like, ah, yes, that's what I wanna say, but I don't want. No, I don't, that doesn't help me, I wanna do it.

Alan Lazaros

I wanna do it. I think we lean into it, man. I think we lean into being more, I guess, authentic? I don't even. Isn't it ironic how we're super authentic but we don't even like that word? So interesting it's? You know why? Because the word is thrown around. You know how many people I've heard say how just be authentic? That are wildly inauthentic.

Kevin Palmieri

Yeah, I mean, there's something to that. There's something to that, I'm telling you. I think the concert example is the best one. If you would see someone who was supposed to have a sold-out show and only 15 people showed up and you feel good about that, I'm not, whatever you do you, but ask yourself do you feel good about that? Because you don't have the confidence to go? Do that? Because that was my experience at Dueling Pianos and I don't think I'll look at it the same again. It's like oh good for her. Those people that went probably had a hell of a time and they're super grateful that she performed even though the audience wasn't full. There's something. There's something to that and I think that's. I think there's something to that as an example of I feel confident in real life. So I don't have to be perfect on the podcast.

Alan Lazaros

Yeah, I think there's something to that too, I feel good when I get off of here.

Kevin Palmieri

I feel good. I feel good. I'm not. It's not like. This is the. And again, please take this gently because it is. I'm living my dream. I'm a privileged human. It's not like this is the. And again, please take this gently because it is. I'm living my dream. I'm a privileged human. It's not like. This is where I get to flex. It's like alright, fuck it.

Kevin Palmieri

Like, look at me, I look like shit all the time. I don't dress up, ever To a detriment. Like I need to. I need a fucking haircut, but I don't want it to be the highlight. Like it is what it is. I didn't have time to do everything. I showered quick. People are coming over today to visit Taryn. I helped her clean up a little bit. This isn't the highlight of my day in terms of my public image. It is the highlight of my day in terms of adding value. And what's the word I'm looking for? Fulfillment, fulfillment For those of you out there watching or listening, bringing it back. I know we get to jump. We do have to jump. We've been had to jump, I know.

Alan Lazaros

I know If you are more confident inside of yourself. Genuinely, that, I think, is true freedom, because if Kevin and I had advertisers and this show was brought to you by, sponsored by, I wonder if we could be as authentic as we are. I wonder if you could share everything you share and I could share everything I share, and that's the reason why we are choosing to be. We prioritize our character and who we are and who we aspire to be, and helping you, serving you, over looking good. Looking good is important, but it's secondary to the main focus and I think some other people have it in the opposite order and I think that's probably the best way I can describe it at this stage.

Kevin Palmieri

Are we off air? Okay, I sent you the steroids. They're on their way. Are we off air?

Alan Lazaros

Very much kidding, Very much kidding, very much kidding, this show is brought to you by HGH.

Kevin Palmieri

Testosterone Replacement Therapy. When I was in high school, there was a baseball forum and it was the word on the street was Kevin Palmieri is on steroids. It was going around all the towns Like, first of all, my family was broke as shit, so I don't know where he thought I was getting money for steroids. Second of all, as much as the tattoos might not show it, I dislike needles strongly. It's like the worst thing in the world. So, yeah, no steroids for the kids. But TRT is the new thing. People are like well, no, oh, no, no, I'm natural, I just take TRT. It's like, well, no, no, that's not natural actually.

Alan Lazaros

When you're injecting testosterone. Yeah, it's like you heard about the lizards on the last episode. Oh, yeah, you heard about the lizards on the last episode. It's like, well, no very high of the healthy range.

Kevin Palmieri

The range is pretty big.

Alan Lazaros

So, honestly, you're kind of taking stand, you're up on superhero range, yeah, what are we doing here?

Kevin Palmieri

Alright, cool. Next, salvation, if you resonate with this type of content. And again, I'm weird, I don't like pumping our tires. I think we do a great job and Ellen and I really want to add value. That's like the main two things for me.

Kevin Palmieri

And I can't promise we are going to be as authentic and honest as possible, because I don't. I don't really want to do it any other way. I wouldn't have started up. I wouldn't have done this if I I won't say that because I did think I had to be somebody else for a long period of time and I really worked through it. But yeah, we want to be authentic, we want to be real, we want never miss an opportunity to get to the next level. There isn't really a point of subscribing honestly, because we do an episode every day, but it helps us. That's what I'll say. It probably will help us more than it will help you, because you know there's going to be an episode every day, but if you want to help us, we'd appreciate that. Next Level the free, private Facebook group. You'll never hear that on a show.

Alan Lazaros

With amazing people. No, no.

Kevin Palmieri

Shout out there's a lot of YouTubers that say look it helps, like, just like, subscribe, comment it helps more than you think. That Hell yeah.

Alan Lazaros

Yeah.

Outro

Kevin Palmieri

All the stuff. Nextleveluniversecom has all the stuff. We have a lot of stuff going on, many free things, some cheap things, stuff, but we have a lot of free stuff. We pride ourselves in that. So check out the website. As always, we love you, we appreciate you, grateful for each and every one of you at nlu we don't have fans, we have family. We will talk to you all tomorrow stay next level, next level nation thanks for joining us for another episode of next level university. We love connecting with the next level family.

Alan Lazaros

We mean it when we say family. If you ever need anything, please reach out to us directly. Everything you need to get a hold of us is in the show notes.

Kevin Palmieri

Thank you again and we will talk to you tomorrow.

Head Shot

Alan Lazaros

Host
Head Shot

Kevin Palmieri

Host