Next Level University

Don’t Be Entitled BUT Don’t Be A Martyr… (1963)

Kevin Palmieri and Alan Lazaros

Use Left/Right to seek, Home/End to jump to start or end. Hold shift to jump forward or backward.

0:00 | 33:47

In today’s episode, Kevin and Alan break down the dangers of both entitlement and martyrdom and share the simple formula for success: Grow, Give, Get. Hear real stories of business owners who failed by pricing themselves out of the market and why adding value first is the key to long-term success. Whether you’re an entrepreneur, coach, or someone looking to improve in life, this episode will help you find the right balance.

_____________________

NLU is not just a podcast; it’s a gateway to a wealth of resources designed to help you achieve your goals and dreams. From our Next Level Dreamliner to our Group Coaching, we offer a variety of tools and communities to support your personal development journey.

For more information, please check out our website at the link below. 👇

Website 💻  http://www.nextleveluniverse.com

_______________________

Any of these communities or resources are FREE to join and consume
Next Level Nation - https://www.facebook.com/groups/459320958216700
Next Level 5 To Thrive (free course) - ​​https://bit.ly/3xffver
Next Level U Book Club - https://bit.ly/3BQBYDr
Next Level Monthly Meet-up:  https://www.nextleveluniverse.com/monthly-meetups/

_______________________

We love connecting with you guys! Reach out on Instagram, Facebook, or via email. We’re here to support you in your personal and professional development journey.

Instagram 📷
Kevin: https://www.instagram.com/neverquitkid/
Alan: https://www.instagram.com/alazaros88/

Facebook ✍
Alan: https://www.facebook.com/alan.lazaros
Kevin: https://www.facebook.com/kevin.palmieri.90/

Email 💬
Kevin@nextleveluniverse.com
Alan@nextleveluniverse.com

LinkedIn ✍
Kevin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kevin-palmieri-5b7736160/
Alan: https://www.linkedin.com/in/alanlazarosllc/

_______________________

Show notes:
(2:27) The two extremes: Entitlement Vs. Martyrdom
(3:53) What entitlement means
(12:22) A bad business lesson: “Just add a zero.”
(16:07) Coaching mistake that led to failure
(18:48) Next Level Dreamliner: the planner, agenda, journal, and habit tracker to rule them all. Get a copy: https://a.co/d/9fPpxEt
(22:14) The truth about 10X income strategies
(30:16) Why balance is the key to success
(33:04) Outro

Send a text to Kevin and Alan!

🎙️ Hosted by Kevin Palmieri and Alan Lazaros

Next Level University is a top-ranked daily podcast for dream chasers and self-improvement lovers. With over 2,100 episodes, we help you level up in life, love, health, and wealth one day at a time. Subscribe for real, honest, no-fluff growth every single day.

Kevin Palmieri

You're new to this, I'm telling you do not charge $970, because you're going to go out of business. Nobody knows you, you don't have any credibility, you don't have any results, you don't have any momentum, you don't have a brand, you don't have any perception. It's not going to work. Alan ended up coaching that person. Later they took their advice and they ended up going out of business and they ended up going out of business.

Alan Lazaros

The correct formula, the optimal formula, the healthy, constructive formula is I become better, I contribute by becoming better in my passions for some, adding value, and then I receive value in return after I grow and give. So it's grow, give, get. That's the formula Grow, give, get, grow, give, get.

Kevin Palmieri

Grow, give. Get Welcome to Next Level University. I'm your host, Kevin Palmieri.

Alan Lazaros

And I'm your co-host, Alan Lazarus.

Kevin Palmieri

At NLU, we believe in a heart-driven but no BS approach to holistic self-improvement for dream chasers.

Alan Lazaros

Our goal with every episode is to help you level up your life, love, health and wealth.

Kevin Palmieri

We bring you a new episode every single day on topics like confidence, self-belief, self-worth, self-awareness, relationships, boundaries, consistency, habits and defining your own unique version of success.

Alan Lazaros

Self-improvement in your pocket, every day, from anywhere, completely free.

Kevin Palmieri

Welcome to Next Level University, next Level Nation. Welcome back to another episode of Next Level University, where we help you level up your life, your love, your health and your wealth. Today, for episode number 1963, your love, your health and your wealth. Today, for episode number 1,963, don't be entitled, but don't be a martyr At this stage.

The two extremes: Entitlement Vs. Martyrdom

Kevin Palmieri

I've had the privilege of working with many, many, many, many people and I have found that there's usually two types of people In the beginning. There are the people that think I am going to charge $1,000 an hour and I am only going to work with five people and blah, blah, blah, blah. I shouldn't have to, I shouldn't have to promote my stuff. People should just come to me, they should flock to me, like the same at the Capistrano. That's one subset. And then the other subset of people are just martyrs who just give, give, give, give, give, give, give, give, give and never, ever ask for anything.

Kevin Palmieri

Now I don't think I would say I would rather be a martyr in the beginning than entitled, honestly, because I think you get further, genuinely, I think you actually make meaningful progress externally. I guess there's an argument for both. But yeah, that was my thought for today's episode. I think it's really easy to If you're somebody who feels like Going back to an episode we had previously where we talked about how purpose just isn't enough Finding your purpose and the mission and your message and that's amazing and it's super important and it's probably a requirement for fulfillment and it's awesome, but it doesn't necessarily mean you're going to succeed, because there has to be some strategy connected, just like you can't just be strategic and do it just for the money, because that's most likely not going to be fulfilling either.

Kevin Palmieri

I think this is another one of those equations where there are some people out there that are entitled. You think, just because you started coaching people should give you money. Okay, there are other people out there that, even though you've worked really hard on yourself and you've worked really hard on adding value and providing content and providing transformation, you never ask for what you're worth. I don't think either of those are a healthy place to live. So how do we figure out where we are and then how to get closer to the center, the drive to five, if you will.

Alan Lazaros

Entitlement is believing that you are worthy of something without becoming worthy of it, without earning it. So one of them is the martyr is I'm going to earn it, earn it, earn it and never receive.

Kevin Palmieri

Should we define martyr? I'm not saying you don't know what it means, whether you're out there watching or listening. Martyr is somebody who dies for something that they believe in. I think that's probably the easiest. I'll look up the actual definition. I learned about it in history class when I was a young man A young lad, please hold here Martyr. A martyr is someone who is persecuted or killed for their beliefs or cause A little heavier than I am. Someone who sacrifices their life or something valuable for a principle. A person who suffers a significant consequence in protest of a cause. So yeah, you could say like I believe that self-improvement should be something that's way more widespread. I'm never going to charge anybody for anything and I'm just going to run myself into the freaking ground.

Kevin Palmieri

Martyr emilia excuse, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me I got it today.

Alan Lazaros

Baby, just made me think of something, but it's irrelevant to everyone. Okay, emilia is upgrading her tech, so she is going to be getting a MacBook Pro. And have you ever seen the Mac Minis? I don't think so. Picture you remember way back in the day when people had and some people still do so Big desktop computers, the big like towers.

Kevin Palmieri

I had a Gateway Nice when they first came out. You would man.

Alan Lazaros

Sorry, my mother purchased it.

Kevin Palmieri

I had nothing to do with it.

Alan Lazaros

Yeah, it's so funny. The way you are with cars is the way I am with computers.

Kevin Palmieri

Typewriter it's like hey, I had a fucking typewriter. I know man, I know.

Alan Lazaros

So Did you know that the double space at the end of a period was because of typewriters?

Kevin Palmieri

I did not.

Alan Lazaros

So people that are from previous generations, like Gen X and older, they do double space after the dot. I think you might do that. Do you do double space after the period? No, no, okay not intentionally. I would judge you harshly if you did. I'm an idiot.

Alan Lazaros

So maybe I do, but it's not because of the typewriter, I can tell you that much I heard from a this is totally irrelevant, but also I'll bring it back emilia's sister has a friend who is a kindergarten teacher and apparently they're not learning how to write, they're only learning how to type. Now, ooh, dangerous game. Yeah see, fascinating, fascinating.

Kevin Palmieri

All that time. Cursive came in pretty.

Alan Lazaros

How many times have you written in cursive Zero?

Kevin Palmieri

Other than when I signed my name. I don't even remember like the Z, it's like just I'll just fucking squiggle, looks good. Do you remember? Last thing, before we stop wasting people's time, do you remember learning cursive with shaving cream on the desks? Do you remember that I, maybe you remember that it was like my favorite time ever.

Alan Lazaros

It's reckless. Okay, entitlement versus martyrdom. Emilia's getting a new macbook laptop and she's gonna get because she has a standing desk. She's two different sort of space stations, for lack of better phrasing two different desks with big monitors and blah, blah, blah, blah. Her office is very well set up. So you've got the MacBook Mini, which is this big it's five by five. It's a little bigger than that, but five by five it's tiny. What used to fit in your gateway, the big, is now this tiny little thing. It's unbelievable. What's just happened with tech? It's really cool, but anyways.

Alan Lazaros

So my point of this is she called up apple and it wasn't apple, it was some call center and this guy ran her through the numbers and then she said hey, I want to check in with ral. Ral is her label for my math brain. Okay, so she calls me ral. Ral stands for rationality. When she wants to make a rational decision, she comes to me with numbers. So she brings Raoul into her office. Hey, I'm Raoul. What's happening? We're so weird and it's not until I'm telling these stories that I realize how weird these things are. Yeah, you guys are weird as shit.

Kevin Palmieri

In the best way. In the best way, not a bad way.

Alan Lazaros

So her remarkable up on the big screen and she pulls up the website on the other screen. Two big tvs on the walls and on the remarkable it has what the guy said and the price points. On the other tv it has the mac pricing and the website and I'm like this isn't making any sense. Whoever that is is wrong, completely wrong. She's like I effing knew it.

Alan Lazaros

So to try to break this down to provide context the MacBook mini is about 800 bucks for the best one, 900 for the best one. The MacBook pro, for the best one, is like 2,600 bucks, something like that. And the monthly payment on the MacBook pro was, according to call center, was $159 a month and the MacBook Mini was $370. I'm like what are we buying a car here? What are we? This is wrong. This is absolutely wrong. My point of this whole thing is entitlement would be and again, I want everyone to equate this to your own life, and I know this is a business metaphor those land, really well, kev, and I know this is a business metaphor, those land really well, kev, bidness, bidness.

Alan Lazaros

Imagine if Apple just decided well, I think, instead of 800 bucks for the MacBook Mini, I want to charge eight grand. All of the customers that are excited for the MacBook Mini would immediately go yeah, fuck that, I'm going to go buy Microsoft, I'm going to go buy a Lenovo or Zenbook or whatever. I think that that's the extreme that you were talking about before, and she's going to end up getting it for the right price and all that stuff. So ignore the rest of that other story. But the point is that we had a mentor who had this concept called add a zero. So if you charge $470 for your product or service, charge $4,700. And I think that it's the dumbest business advice ever. That's entitlement. The MacBook Mini didn't get any better and you're just going to add a zero because you think it's worth more than that, because you think that the problem in life and I really want this to land One of the reasons why a lot of people don't succeed externally is because of entitlement.

Alan Lazaros

They say, well, I should earn more. But what you don't understand is the business can't just charge more because they feel like it, because if they do, people are going to go to Microsoft instead of Apple or Dell or whatever neweggcom. The point that I'm making, though, is entitled means you deserve, deserve, deserve, never work to earn it. Martyrdom is you earn it, earn it, earn it, never receive anything. Neither one of those is conducive. So here's the new formula Grow, contribute, receive, in that order.

Alan Lazaros

So I make the Mac, and this is just a metaphor. I make the Mac book, I'm Apple. I make the Mac book mini more better, more powerful, looks better, designed, better. Okay, I grow, that's grow. I contribute, I sell it to people and in return, I get money. I sell it to people and in return, I get money. Not $8,000, but $800. That, I think, is a formula for success. It's I grow. Alan Lazarus, kevin Palmieri, we grow, we become better podcasters, we contribute and add value on this podcast, and if we do that enough, we will receive profit as a byproduct. I think that that's the drive to five here. Whereas an entitled person says I'm going to start a podcast, how come I don't have a million listens and a martyr starts a podcast, does 2,000 episodes and basically does it for free, without making a dollar?

Kevin Palmieri

It's a very interesting thing, because I think I would always much rather start off as a martyr. I was having a conversation with somebody recently and I said, yeah, we just got a $10,000 client. They just paid us $10,000. And if I stopped there, you'd be like oh yeah, cool, you guys, do anything for less than $10,000. I be like oh yeah, cool, you guys, you don't do anything for less than $10,000. Like no, no, no, I mean, that's the only reason we ever had that opportunity is because we've been doing this for the last six years at a very reasonable price, and the only reason it's $10,000 is because they wanted like 500 of the same thing. It's not because I decided like ten thousand seems good, I don't get out of bed for any less than than a jibo baby.

Alan Lazaros

So can you tell the story with the add a zero? And then one more story with the client we'll call him steve where you raised the price and lost the opportunity completely.

Kevin Palmieri

Now.

Alan Lazaros

I want to preface this real quick. Anyone watching or listening your career, your job, your career, your calling your business. I don't care if you're in corporate or 9 to 5 or part-time or freelancer. This applies to you. This applies to everyone. Just because you're not a business owner doesn't mean this doesn't apply. It's the same principle. Entitlement will get you killed in business. If Apple was entitled, they'd say well, we're the best, so we're going to charge $8,000. Well, good luck selling Mac minis for $8,000. Because when I saw that price point that was wrong by the call center, I said do not do that under any circumstances. You might as well buy another car instead of that. It turns out the price was wrong because that person was inaccurate. The price is wrong, bob.

Kevin Palmieri

So we were at this well, alan kind of already alluded to it, but we were at this mastermind and they said hey, we're going to teach you how to essentially 10x your income right away. I'm in Money's good, I've been waiting to 10x my income.

Alan Lazaros

What do you think when you hear that now?

Kevin Palmieri

Now it's like it's just fucking dumb. What did you think back then? I thought there was going to be a strategy. Just like I'm open to hearing, I don't expect it to be one line or just five words strung together.

Alan Lazaros

Now it's like, oh, you're going to 10x it, 100x it.

Kevin Palmieri

It's like, oh, you're gonna 10X it, 100x it. It's like, no, that's dumb, stupid, stupid, dumb. Some people can, yes, but it's again, it's the exception to the rule, not the rule I this is, this is this is my new thing. Most of the sexiest advice out there on the planet is going to work for the smallest amount of people. There are some people that can raise their prices at a zero. There are some people, but not most people.

Alan Lazaros

We can't. There's a therapist you and I'll keep it anonymous. There's a therapist. You and Taryn wanted to go see a couples counselor, not because anything was wrong, but because you wanted to improve your relationship. I respect that and you found out the price and you like.

Kevin Palmieri

there's no way it was like no way. I think it was like six, five hundred bucks an hour.

Alan Lazaros

You cannot do like not everybody can do that now that person has clients at that rate. But it's a different, it's a different demographic, right? So, right now, if she just added a zero forty seven hundred dollars an hour, there's no way you guys could do that?

Coaching mistake that led to failure

Alan Lazaros

Who exactly are you coaching or therapizing, right? So just keep in mind that this Kevin and I have a window into the lives of many individuals and there's a big difference in the real world and the social world. In the social world, it sounds really cool to add a zero or to 10x your income. But in the social world, in the social world, it sounds really cool to add a zero or to 10x your income, but in the real world there's a lot more to it than that and it doesn't mean you can't do it. But usually to 10x your income, it's going to take at least three to five years, if not 10.

Kevin Palmieri

Well, think about it this way If you're out there right now and you're, let's say, you're a life coach and you charge $10 per call, yeah, at some point you'll be able to add a zero to that.

Alan Lazaros

Right.

Kevin Palmieri

At some point, you'll be able to add a zero to that, because you're under, you're in the martyrdom category. I mean, it's going to be really hard to make enough meaningful money charging that to grow the business, but if you're somebody who charges $150 an hour and you just you know what I want to charge $1,500 an hour, that's entitled why. Why, though, do you feel like you've gotten 10 times more valuable? Do you feel like you can add 10 times the value? Do you feel like you're capable of, like you can add 10 times the value? Do you feel like you're capable of helping this person solve their problems in 90% less time? So it used to take 10 calls. Now it only takes one call. If none of those are the answer, maybe it's coming from a place of entitlement. I think that's the conversation. So yeah, they literally said we're going to teach you how to 10X your income today. All you have to do is add a zero. It's like I thought it was a joke, like you guys are good, you got me, now let's talk.

Alan Lazaros

No, no, that was-. You actually thought they were joking.

Kevin Palmieri

At the beginning I mean, yeah, what a dumb thing to say.

Alan Lazaros

Yeah, that's luck who's going to pay $20,000?

Kevin Palmieri

But here's the thing. Here's the thing Almost everybody in that room was financially free Getting to that mastermind. I mean, that was like an expensive mastermind, honestly. A lot of them probably are going to get away with it because the clients they work with can afford it, but they won't be able to sustain it. But certainly, yeah, there was a young lady there who was very new to coaching had never, never coached before.

Alan Lazaros

Had no clients person, huge fan. I coached awesome person. Yeah, wonderful, awesome person.

Kevin Palmieri

I her and I went outside after, because after the the sessions you can go outside. Hang for a little bit.

Alan Lazaros

Take notes whatever now keep in mind when kevin's pulling her aside? I want to. I want notes, whatever now keep in mind when kevin's pulling her aside. I want to. I want to make sure we share this. When kevin's pulling her aside, we had already had a multi-six-figure business, our own business, multi-six figures at this point. So you're not talking from a place of not knowing how to build a business, right. You're pulling her aside having done this from scratch. You were where she was four years before that.

Kevin Palmieri

And I had worked with a lot of people that were in her position.

Next Level Dreamliner: the planner, agenda, journal, and habit tracker to rule them all. Get a copy:

Alan Lazaros

Yeah, hello, hello, hello, nlu listener. Thank you, as always, for listening to Next Level University. Real quick. I just want to jump in and let you know about the Next Level Dreamliner. This is a journal that I use every single day. Achieve your dreams 90 days at a time. It breaks down your dreams into goals, milestones and daily habits. We hope you enjoy it. The link will be in the show notes.

Kevin Palmieri

Again, she wasn't. That advice wasn't for her. So her and I went outside and I said look, I I understand what you're feeling right now. You feel like you just got handed the keys to the castle and maybe right now you're charging. You're going to charge your clients 97 bucks per call. You're new to this. I'm telling you do not charge 970, because you're going to go out of business. Nobody knows you, you don't have any credibility, you don't have any results, you don't have any momentum, you don't have a brand, you don't have any perception. It's not going to work. Alan ended up coaching that person. Later they took their advice and they ended up going out of business. I tried my best. It's hard, it's, that's but.

Alan Lazaros

And, by the way, the person who gave that advice also went out of business and again, I like this person.

Kevin Palmieri

This person was helpful to us and they're a positive person and they're a positive influence in the world. Huge, fan, huge.

Alan Lazaros

I just think that advice is terrible for the vast majority of humans they got a three hundred thousand dollar client and I you were there for this, you were witnessing me ask them about it they're like, oh yeah, we're just gonna do that from now on. Then I said, well, what do you mean? They said, well, they signed up for three thousand dollars. We ended up getting them results, and now they just, they just decided to do three thousand, and so now we're gonna stop doing the three thousand dollar. Wait, wait, but isn't that a unique? That's like a unicorn client. You're not gonna.

Kevin Palmieri

Well, the other thing was they lived in the same neighborhood and they would go on. They went on walks like every day for like two years or something they were. You can't replicate that yeah, it's.

Alan Lazaros

It's you like babysit this person's children? Yeah it's very specific. Yeah, don't build your business on the anomaly, build your that's like apple. So yeah, apple has clients that pay for computers. Imagine a school buys all apple computers. Our school had the very first max. Remember way back the middle school. That was probably a good you know 80 grand or something client for them. But that doesn't mean they charge emilia for the macbook mini. They tried. No, they didn't try.

Alan Lazaros

They didn't try, but that's I just again. Let's bring this back to the personal development side, which is whatever your job is, whatever your career is, whatever your calling is, if you have a business, a career or a or a job, when I made minimum wage, I worked for a golf course. I was a cart kid and a bus boy and I used to clean clubs on the 18th green. The guys would come up and I'd try to clean their clubs. They'd give me a tip. I found ways to add value, to make more money. But I didn't go to the owners and say hey, instead of, instead of the money, you're paying me the eight bucks an hour, you're paying me 725 I think it was at the time minimum wage. Uh, instead of that, I was thinking 70 bucks, thoughts I'm 15, 16 years old, they would be like Get fucked.

Kevin Palmieri

Yeah, we'll find someone else.

Alan Lazaros

Yeah, we'll find someone else, because there's a Lot of people that need that job. I was in high school. I got this. I went to this seminar. And they told me yeah, they told me to add a zero. Let me ask you a question.

Kevin Palmieri

I think the fear under the fear, under being a martyr, is usually I'm not valuable. Most likely that's at least what I've seen is like I don't want people to think I'm doing this for the wrong reasons. I don't feel like I'm worth it, yet I don't have enough proof. Whatever is, what do you think the fear under the entitled side is?

Alan Lazaros

The same. It's a different response to the same insecurity. The insecurity is I don't want people to see me or view me as less valuable Because deep down I know that I'm, I think and again, I know that sounds presumptuous, but entitlement is a response?

Kevin Palmieri

a trauma response to insecurity. Well, we're not claiming that this is scientific by any stretch of the imagination, so I I think it might sound. Well, let me ask you.

Alan Lazaros

Why do you, kevin and I have a really hard time with entitlement? We do, we're, we're, I. I say this on other podcasts. Whenever I go on other podcasts they say where can people find you? I say we have a podcast podcast called Next Level University. You can go to nextleveluniversecom, spelled just like it sounds. We've got a book club, we've got monthly meetups, we've got a Dreamliner, a journal, all kinds of free stuff. We've got paid stuff. We've got a lot going on.

Alan Lazaros

If you are humble and grateful and you have a sincere interest to earn your way to success externally and fulfillment internally, you're going to love me, you're going to love Kev, you're going to love NLU. We're the ultimate try-hards. If you, on any level, are entitled and ungrateful and lack humility and you want huge rewards for minimal effort, do not reach out under any circumstances. You're going to waste your time and ours because we're never going to be able to help you play that game. Because we're not playing that game, we're not. Don't get me wrong, kevin and I, we are earning our way, we're, we're. I think we're finally running a formula where we're earning it growing. We're working on ourselves to grow as an individual, but as businesses as a business, and then we're giving with that business, adding value, adding value, adding value, and then we are receiving as well, receiving profitable. We are a profitable company. That is the formula.

Alan Lazaros

So, again, martyrdom is give, give, give, never get. Entitlement is get, get, get, never give, or give very little, but get, get, get. The correct formula, the optimal formula, the healthy, constructive formula is I become better, I contribute by becoming better in my passions for some, adding value, and then I receive value in return after I grow and give. So it's grow, give, get. That's the formula Grow, give, get, grow, give, get, grow, give, get. And when you get, when you receive, you can increase your quality of life, which then allows you to grow even more and contribute even more and then get even more. Apple started 47 years ago and at the beginning they couldn't charge that much because they had shitty products.

Kevin Palmieri

You were gonna say something and you didn't say it.

Alan Lazaros

What.

Kevin Palmieri

I don't know. I don't know what you're going to say. You're going to say something.

Alan Lazaros

How do you know?

Kevin Palmieri

I think you said I was going to. I think you said I'm going to say something. I think I could have been out to lunch. The cough medicine has taken me.

Alan Lazaros

There's a book called the Go-Getter Bob Berg. I honestly don't know. Is that true? It's Bob Berg, yeah. And then there's a book called the Go-Getter Go-Giver Sorry, that's Bob Berg, go-giver. So there's the Go-Getter, that's the entitled, then there's the Go-Giver, that's the martyr, and then there's the Grow-Giver. There's the go giver, that's the martyr, and then there's the grow giver. I grow, and then I give, and then I receive, and then I grow more. This is a really cool metaphor. I'll go quickly with it, but if if I use Kevin example, kev's bodybuilding right now, I heard on a podcast recently God, this is so hard for me. Oh well, you know. I found out that when I'm on stage, I burn 14,000 calories in a day.

Kevin Palmieri

On stage.

Alan Lazaros

Yeah, I remember thinking to myself there's no way you would wither away to nothing.

Alan Lazaros

That means you have to eat 15,000 calories a day just to sustain your current body On stage doing what? Speaking? Oh yeah.

Alan Lazaros

So my point is that if you I'll use Kev as an example Kev goes to the gym and he lifts weights, then Kev has to eat a lot. When he eats more than he burns, he builds muscle. I think that a martyr is someone who is always giving more than they're getting, rather than someone it's almost like entitled is eat, eat, eat, never burn, burn, burn. And then a martyr is burn, burn, burn to the ground. And I think that that's with the human body If you are always giving more than more energy out than you are receiving in, you're going to die.

Alan Lazaros

The book Viktor Frankl wrote, called the man's search for meaning, talked about how people were dying of starvation because they were working them to literally the bones and the body ate its own muscle, and they, a lot of them, died because they only had a bread ration and mart like a teaspoon of margarine per day or honey or whatever. And that's basically giving, giving, giving, being forced to work, in this case in the concentration camps and they just die because they are only ever giving, they're never receiving, and I think that that's what a lot of people do, unfortunately, in business, and that's how they go out of business, and then other people are not doing any work and just sitting there, entitled, expecting to get people to work for them, and I think that that's.

Kevin Palmieri

I think it's worth exploring because it crosses over to so many different things. When Tara and I go out to dinner, we usually and again, I don't know if this helps or not, that would definitely change the way I do this, but we usually stack up our plates. We stack them up, make them easy for the waiter or waitress or the bus person who's going to clean it up after.

Kevin Palmieri

I don't think they should cut my food in front of me and I don't think they should do all that. I feel like that's a little bit entitled. But I also can understand that you can take that too far if I'm like, ah, let me take it to the back, ah, I'm going to clean my own, I'll clean my own dishes, let me take care of that. Honestly, let me cook my own food too. Like, take the day off. That's probably not sustainable either.

Kevin Palmieri

I think figuring out what end you're on, why you're on that end, the discomfort with working towards the middle, that is step one and honestly, I think it's going to serve you. I think that's going to serve you Because if you're entitled in a relationship, you're screwed. If you're a martyr in a relationship, you're equally screwed on a different front. And I think that carries over to everything. We all know somebody who they are just insufferable Because nothing is ever good enough for them and they always send it back proverbially, not really, but it's always like, well, this isn't right, this isn't right, this isn't right. But we also know somebody who you could literally serve them a baseball covered in chocolate and they'd be like, yeah, no, I could, I'll find a way to get it down. I appreciate it.

Why balance is the key to success

Kevin Palmieri

Thank you so much because they don't feel valuable and they don't feel worthy of anything more. I don't think either of those are the place to live. We have to figure out what five is for each and every one of us in our own unique way, and that is the goal in today's episode.

Alan Lazaros

And for any new listeners. Five means the center point. The center point Zero is you have no value and you're a martyr and you're give, give, give, never receive. 10 is you're entitled, you think things, you think you deserve things by default and people should cut your meat for you, in front of you, and and they should be flat uh what is it fanning you with? Leaves to make sure that you're nice and cool yeah, well, who was the guy's name in titanic?

Kevin Palmieri

cal cal. Cal is entitled. Yeah, he's the worst. Cal is entitled. Let'd say Jack is pretty close to five, I agree yeah. Even though he's treated like where's Rose.

Alan Lazaros

Rose is under, rose is under Martyr. See, there you go.

Kevin Palmieri

Titanic is life.

Alan Lazaros

She's literally getting married in that film to protect her family, because her mom is afraid of the debts that her dad left.

Kevin Palmieri

Yes, and yeah, let me ask you a question. You know they made a Titanic too, not them, but someone did. Seriously, yeah, yeah, it's terrible, yeah, I bet.

Alan Lazaros

That's a tough act to follow. It is a tough act to follow.

Kevin Palmieri

Also, how could you? I mean, there was one Titanic. They made a movie on it that. What happened? Obviously not, you know it's story-ized, but yeah, okay, All right. Next Level Nation, if you are trying to stay more consistent in fitness. Alan and I are very bad at many things. We are also very good at some things, and one of those things is staying consistent, especially when it comes to fitness. We have a free, totally free WhatsApp group. It's called the Next Level Fitness Accountability Group. We are in there pretty much every day. There's people sharing their wins, there's people sharing their streaks all that happy jazz Reach out to me or Alan, but me is probably better because Alan is busier than I. My links for Instagram and Facebook are in the show notes, so you can just shoot me a DM. Hey, Kev, I want to be in the group. I'll make sure you get in there. We'll have that link below.

Alan Lazaros

Here's my promise if you are out there and you're struggling to be consistent, you're struggling to stay accountable, you're struggling to do the hard things that you know you need to be doing to achieve your goals I'm leaning into goal achievement. So it's, we'll have clarity. You'll have absolute clarity on 10 decade dreams, one statement toward your dreams, sort of your true north. Then we'll have your top three goals for the quarter. Then we'll have your top three priorities for the quarter. We'll have your top three metrics underneath those priorities and then we'll have habits that you do daily and track daily in order to achieve your goals. If you're sick and tired of not achieving your goals, it's almost february and most people's new year's resolutions at this point, statistically, are gone. If you don't want that anymore, reach out to me so you can DM me on Facebook. Dm Kev on Facebook for the Fitness Accountability Group. Dm me on Facebook if you want to coach with someone who is going to help you achieve your goals.

Outro

Kevin Palmieri

Boom. I think we're like 7.7% done with a year already. How crazy is that? Yeah, it's wild, wild, all right, as as always, we love you, we appreciate you, grateful for each and every one of you, and at nlu we do not have fans, we have family. We will talk to you all tomorrow stay next level, next level nation thanks for joining us for another episode of next level university. We love connecting with the next level family we mean it when we say family.

Alan Lazaros

If you ever need anything, please reach out to us directly. Everything you need to get a hold of us is in the show notes.

Kevin Palmieri

Thank you again and we will talk to you tomorrow.