Next Level University

How Bad Do You ACTUALLY Want It? - Freestyle Friday (2013)

• Kevin Palmieri and Alan Lazaros

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Do your daily actions prove how badly you want your goals? In this honest and energizing conversation, Kevin and Alan ask the tough questions we often avoid. From skipping workouts to chasing comfort, they unpack what it takes to succeed and how to tell if you’re genuinely committed or saying the right things. They discuss staying disciplined when no one’s watching, how relationships impact your grind, and knowing what fuels your self-worth.

Learn more about:
Next Level Live 2025: Saturday, April 5th, 2024 (10:00 am to 4:00 pm EST)  - https://www.nextleveluniverse.com/next-level-live/

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NLU is not just a podcast; it’s a gateway to a wealth of resources designed to help you achieve your goals and dreams. From our Next Level Dreamliner to our Group Coaching, we offer a variety of tools and communities to support your personal development journey.

For more information, please check out our website at the link below. 👇

Website 💻  http://www.nextleveluniverse.com

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We love connecting with you guys! Reach out on Instagram, Facebook, or via email. We’re here to support you in your personal and professional development journey.

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Kevin: https://www.instagram.com/neverquitkid/
Alan: https://www.instagram.com/alazaros88/

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Alan@nextleveluniverse.com

LinkedIn ✍
Kevin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kevin-palmieri-5b7736160/
Alan: https://www.linkedin.com/in/alanlazarosllc/

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Show notes:
(3:50) Choosing purpose over comfort
(5:14) Feeding the good wolf
(7:35) What do you tie your self-esteem to?
(9:31) How personal relationships affect performance
(12:35) Motivation: Past Vs. Future focus
(14:32) Feeling valued in the correct rooms
(16:12) Join Next Level Live: A virtual, immersive event for those committed to growth, meaningful relationships, and a life they love. https://www.nextleveluniverse.com/next-level-live/
(18:54) Thought Vs. Action Vs. Identity
(22:18) Losing the show: A wake-up call
(26:27) You don’t have to like it—do it
(30:28) Listening to your highest self
(32:45) Outro

Send a text to Kevin and Alan!

Kevin Palmieri:

We all say that we want it, but if you imagine that there was a camera crew following you around, would they know how bad you actually want the thing that you say you want through your actions, or would they be completely confused as to why you were doing nothing about it?

Alan Lazaros:

I've said this many times who you are and what you are when no one's watching is more important than what you post on social media. I post on social media too, I'm not making that wrong, but who you are and what you are when no one's watching is the real you.

Kevin Palmieri:

Welcome to Next Level University. I'm your host, kevin Palmieri, and.

Alan Lazaros:

I'm your co-host, Alan Lazarus.

Kevin Palmieri:

At NLU we believe in a heart-driven but no BS approach to holistic self-improvement for dream chasers.

Alan Lazaros:

Our goal with every episode is to help you level up your life love health and wealth.

Kevin Palmieri:

We bring you a new episode every single day, on topics like confidence, self-belief, self-worth, self-awareness, relationships, boundaries, consistency, habits and defining your own unique version of success.

Alan Lazaros:

Self-improvement in your pocket, every day, from anywhere, completely free.

Kevin Palmieri:

Welcome to Next Level University, next Level Nation. Today, for episode number 2013,'s freestyle friday, I saw a clip online. Somebody shared it and it was one of those gut punch. Oh my goodness, this is maybe the most valuable piece of content I've ever seen.

Alan Lazaros:

Whoa, it was really good from my instagram page is pretty good like yeah I was just.

Kevin Palmieri:

Everything on alan's page just got me. This is amazing. This is the encyclopedia of self improvement. How have I not seen this before? Did you know? I was gonna say that I did not, but it was very well done nice, thank you, very well done.

Alan Lazaros:

I didn't have to say just joking on I was.

Kevin Palmieri:

I was waiting for that. It was something along the lines of if there was somebody following you around all day and they had no idea what your goals were, would it align with how much you say you actually want it? And it was really. I mean, I've met a lot of people that say they want it, but their actions don't. Their actions don't suggest that they actually do and their actions don't suggest that they actually do and their actions don't suggest that they're ever going to get it, and it just I don't know. It was one of those.

Kevin Palmieri:

You and I have been having a lot of talks internal, external, social world, real world. We've been having a lot of those talks, especially probably the last six months, and I just think if we had that perspective more who knows we would probably do more, we would probably be more productive or we would be more courageous or whatever it is. If you had an audience of people watching you all the time, you would live your life completely differently. Now, would it be healthy? I'm not saying it would be, but I think that's a cool perspective.

Alan Lazaros:

So I actually don't think I would live my life any differently, but in the past, for sure, for sure. I was telling Kev yesterday, spring day, we're in New England, it was the first really warm sunny day yesterday and I went out into the world. I went to speak at WPI and I get out of the speech. It's noon, the campus, they're playing bags on the quad. I mean this is my old stomping grounds. This is my old stomping grounds. This is I'm getting the college vibes. We're hanging out Skipping class.

Alan Lazaros:

And I had two versions of me. One was you know, it'd be really nice to go into the dining common, get a nice coffee, maybe eat some lunch, maybe I'll stop at Panera on the way home. And then I look at my calendar and there's this metaphor of the good wolf and the bad wolf, and they're always fighting and which one wins is the one that you feed. Now again, disclaimer. This is going to sound really hardcore, but this is kind of how my highest self talks to me. Alan, don't you fucking dare? You know what you're supposed to do. Get your ass home, get in your office and finish your calendar strong. Finish your day strong.

Alan Lazaros:

If you didn't have a call, would you have done it? No, of course not. I would have gone home to my office and done what I know I'm supposed to do Now and again my highest self plus human self. That was the whole thing. And, by the way, that's another little side tangent I've been talking a lot about with that with my clients. Your highest self knows what you're supposed to do. Your human self wants to eat pizza and ice cream. I'm not saying the human self is wrong. You've got to indulge the human self every now and then. You are human but you can't let it win all the time. You've got to be real, real careful with that. If your goals are aligned with your calling your highest self, your best self, best version of you. Then you got to follow through.

Alan Lazaros:

I had a bunch of stuff on my calendar coaching, training, podcasting and I knew the right answer. I knew I'm on campus, everyone else is hanging out. I knew I had to get my ass in that car, drive home and work. And the truth is and I need to say this explicitly that is why we are more successful. That is the sole reason. Actually, that is the main reason, like. If I were to point to one thing. It's that it's my actions are oriented very strategically around my most important goals, and if that wasn't the case, we would not have gotten to where we are. And I do love my life and we have the dream, we live the dream and it's great. We're living, living our dreams, living out our dreams, and moments like that blow, and that's okay. They're supposed to blow. You can't have something for nothing. Something for nothing is dumb, it's not real, and anyone who's trying to convince you it is is wrong.

Kevin Palmieri:

I promise, I think it would have been cool to get lunch for me.

Alan Lazaros:

For me. What do you think of that? I think if your schedule allows it, but you have to understand that if you get lunch, you're leaving something else on the table. That's all I'm not saying. Getting lunch is a bad thing. I was on a coaching session with a client who was at a coffee shop during the coaching session. But don't get it twisted. You are either building towards your goals and dreams or you're not.

Kevin Palmieri:

Period. There is no in between. No, I can't agree with that. You could be at a coffee shop and work.

Alan Lazaros:

That's what I'm saying. Oh, that's building towards your goals and dreams.

Kevin Palmieri:

Okay, I thought you were saying that.

Alan Lazaros:

Yeah, I meant like in this playful metaphor on the quad, I on the quad. I meant I'm going to fuck off now.

Kevin Palmieri:

Like that that old college vibes came out.

Alan Lazaros:

It was I used to party during the day, I mean what do? You think of St Paddy's Day, was that past week, and I could tell some of the kids were drunk still, still dealing with it.

Kevin Palmieri:

What would you say, I told you? I said, hey, when I get a nice car I'll be different. I don't know how to explain it. I don't know how to explain it. I'm going to be different. What do you think about that now? Versus what you did before, is it any different?

Alan Lazaros:

I think it makes a lot of sense now yeah, I've been doing this with clients regularly is figure out the top three things that you tie your self-esteem to. One of my clients anonymously is physical appearance, number one. Number two is I got to close my eyes for this. My memory works better when I close my eyes, all right. First one is physical appearance. Second one is wait for it, wait for it. Oh my God, I'm going to forget, I know, know.

Kevin Palmieri:

the third one.

Alan Lazaros:

The third one is being seen as capable. Oh, the second one is relationship status. Okay, first one is physical appearance. Second one is relationship status. Third one is being seen as capable. She wants to be seen as very competent. So we figured out the top leverage points under each of those and made sure that those are happening, because, really, when you do learn how to feel good about yourself from an authentic place, you have more gas in the tank to like, grind your face off.

Alan Lazaros:

Essentially, yeah, when Emilia and I aren't, well, this is my best example. If Emilia and I weren't 10 out of 10, we're 10 out of 10 right now. I was just in her office, just great. I feel like a million bucks. My relationship is great. I'm 10 out of 10 in love. Dude, I can check, I can tackle the world right now. That's great. Now I gotta say humble because I'm gonna get smacked in the head with a brick here, but the truth is is when her and I aren't strong and I'm, you know, in shame of something, or or we have like a non 10 out of 10 in love moment, challenging moment. I have really hard time. I have a really hard time getting up and grinding. Yeah, I understand, I do, yeah, and that's I think that our central nervous system is tied to whatever makes us feel safe and so, for example, if you and Taryn weren't good right now, you'd have a really hard time doing a good job on this episode.

Kevin Palmieri:

Less than you.

Alan Lazaros:

For sure, for sure, and that's why it's important to understand your own unique things, that your self-esteem is tied to. Kevin has a harder time performing when we have less money. It doesn't affect me as much as it affects you, but if Emilia and I aren't 10 out of 10, let's say we're nine out of 10, which is still great. It affects me more than it affects you.

Alan Lazaros:

And so I've done this with several clients. I actually did it with three of my clients. Figure out the top three things that you tie your self-esteem to and, by the way, you're not going to like the answers. The answers are embarrassing. If I was a strong man, it doesn't matter what she thinks, you know it's. Even if I, you know I'll be fine on my own. That's what macho bullshit is. What that is the truth is no way. I was a shell of myself before, emilia in comparison to now, and you need to understand what your needs are and you need to learn how to meet them constructively Now. Yesterday, if I had fucked off all afternoon, that would be a destructive way to meet my needs.

Kevin Palmieri:

Yeah, it's hard because I think for me it would have been constructive not to fuck off, but nostalgia, reflection, seeing how far I've come. I think that puts gas in the tank for me and again, everybody's different right, you need to know that, yeah. But again, it depends on what's scheduled.

Alan Lazaros:

If I had nothing scheduled, would I have taken 20 minutes to go see the campus and reminisce, maybe.

Kevin Palmieri:

But that's not going to do it for me, it probably would for you and it's also not. That's the thing. If it's not supposed to do it for you, then you're not supposed to do it. That's the other piece. I think certain things for me. I never thought I was going to be here. I never thought I'd be successful. So not getting to the point where I'm just sailing on that and staying on that and saying, yeah, you know what this is good. I'm content that can't happen.

Alan Lazaros:

That can't happen, but I think moments of time. Does that not happen for you? You and I are so different, but we have such similar core values. I like the future, I go into the future and I love to be up against my future self.

Kevin Palmieri:

No.

Alan Lazaros:

You love to go into the past and see how far you've come. For me, that doesn't motivate me.

Kevin Palmieri:

I don't know what If anything.

Alan Lazaros:

I go into the past and it's like I don't know if anything.

Kevin Palmieri:

I go into the past and it's like I don't know what the future is going to be like. I don't know what my potential is. I'm beyond what I thought I was capable of, so I don't know. No, I need to look back. Going to the future doesn't? Motivate you I'd say, now more than ever, you and I have some very specific goals that we've set this year that are have lit a fire under my butt, but, honestly, there's a goal under that, under that, under that.

Alan Lazaros:

So, no, not nearly as much as you yeah, it's a good conversation for all the listeners. Viewers, what motivates you more? Seeing how far you've come or seeing how fucking far behind you are?

Kevin Palmieri:

well, if you have high self-belief, it's gonna be the second one, yeah, most, likely, yeah, well I don't want to lose that. I'm afraid I need both.

Alan Lazaros:

I think we all need both, yeah yeah, because if you want all cylinders, we have the five m's of motivation. We're going to teach it at next level live, picture a car with five cylinders. Apparently there are cars with five cylinders.

Kevin Palmieri:

I don't volvos, I believe, audis, the audi rs3 very nice car, very fast, five cylinders, turbo, yep. Hey, I was talking to someone today so exciting for me and and she was like I don't know if I'm supposed to tell you this or not. I don't, I don't think you'd mind. Alan told me something and immediately I was like I don't know if I'm supposed to tell you this or not, I don't think you'd mind. Alan told me something and immediately I was like oh boy, word on the street is at some point You're going to have a car YouTube channel. And I was like, oh, my goodness, it's happening. I just said that, like two weeks ago, it's already happening.

Alan Lazaros:

Hell yeah, I am so at some point. But it's going to be a car channel. I meant like 15 years.

Kevin Palmieri:

It's got to be sooner than I can't do. I can't do 10, we'll do 10. Meet you, maybe, meet somewhere in the middle. It's going to be a self, it's going to be a car channel, but it's going to be infused with self-improvement. That's always going to be, yeah, that's always going to be the gist of it.

Alan Lazaros:

So just throw just throw that out there. There's a lot of people who value cars. I understand now. I didn't get it in the past. There's a lot of people who value cars. You obviously are passionate about cars and you're passionate about self-improvement. So when you combine them, you can help expose more people to self-improvement, which is the purpose of NLU.

Kevin Palmieri:

That's the goal you.

Alan Lazaros:

That's the goal, I get it, I do, I get it. And there's a lesson in there, I think for everybody too is I've always wondered to myself why I'm so valued in certain places and then so hated in others. And it makes a lot more sense now. In a group of engineers yesterday, I felt very valued and more understood. I could use asymptote. That was so cool. It's like awesome that I can use that stuff. It's a drug.

Kevin Palmieri:

Use a drug in front of everybody.

Alan Lazaros:

You know what an asymptote is. Use a drug. Yeah, I did a little asymptote right before.

Kevin Palmieri:

You got any left over, send it on over. Give it a go.

Alan Lazaros:

So I walk up the stairs of the innovation building and it's like heaven. There's tech, there's 3d printers, there's people everywhere, there's whiteboards on every wall, people are brainstorming and Practically yelling at each other. They both have markers, they're they're doing equations on the walls and shit. I'm like this is fucking awesome. This is where I live, right here. This is awesome. This is area day. This is academic, but anyway. So in certain settings you're really valued and then in other settings you're really not. So if I don't drink, back when I used to drink, whenever I would go to a party where people were really valued drinking, I was very valued and then when I stopped drinking, I would be significantly less valued. It was just I was just a pain in the ass. It was like okay, so I'm wasted, you're not. I want to have a deep conversation. They don't you ever play that really dumb game where there's a log in the center of the game and there's an axe, a hatchet, and you have to like it's a drinking game with a hatchet. No.

Kevin Palmieri:

Next Level Nation. We are very, very excited to announce that we are doing our first purely virtual Next Level Live. On April 5th 2025, from 10 am to 4 pm Eastern Standard Time, alan and myself will be live streaming from Worcester, massachusetts.

Alan Lazaros:

Next Level, live 2025. Be there, it's only $47 for a full day of personal development, self-improvement, holistic health, wealth, life and love.

Kevin Palmieri:

We have a global audience. Obviously, if you live somewhere else in the world, it's hard to come across the country or across the world for a one-day event, so we wanted to make sure it was accessible to everyone.

Alan Lazaros:

You're not going to get to the next level of your life by default. You're going to get there by design. Join us, design that next level. Quick story Freestyle Friday. So this is my sober days.

Alan Lazaros:

Fitness model, competitor, fitness coach and I used to run amok. I used to party and I stopped partying and so all my friends used to party, still partied, and I would go to the parties. How many times can I say party in one sentence? I went to this one party. This was a rager, I'm talking. This was the house that one of my friends got that. They, they ran amok at this house.

Alan Lazaros:

It was way in the woods, probably 40 minutes south of me, 50 minutes, and it was like a bonfire. Just I'm talking ragers every other weekend. It was wild. I don't know how the landlords allowed any of this, but anyways. So in the garage, I get there and everybody's drunk and I got there late because I was going to the gym or whatever, and I'm not making this wrong because in the past I would have been right there. But I get there and they're throwing a hatchet around in a circle at a, at a log, and it's a drinking game and you have to try to hit the a certain spot in order to win the game or whatever. I remember thinking this is fucking ridiculous. Like you guys, this is really dangerous, right, and I was like I think I should go.

Kevin Palmieri:

I should probably go you know, this is not headed in a good direction.

Alan Lazaros:

And again, like I said, I've been there in the past. I would have been, I would have been playing, for sure. So I'm not trying to judge, but you're very valued in the direction of other people's values. So if you're in a room of people that love football and you're a rock star football player, you'll be really valued. If you're in a room of people who love personal development and you're really well developed, you'll be more valued, and I think that that's really important for everyone to understand and that's kind of a side tangent to what we're talking about I feel like this is like the ultimate freestyle friday.

Kevin Palmieri:

We're kind of all over the place.

Kevin Palmieri:

I like it nice I like it it's kevin's style sometimes I have stuff that I think would make for a good segment, but not I don't have enough stuff to talk about for a full episode. The imagine somebody who is following you around would they believe in your goals as much as you believe in your goals, like that's a really good perspective, but it's hard to do a 30 minute episode on that. But I think it's a good concept. It's. It's so easy to say that you want it. I used to say this not all the time, and maybe I've never said it publicly, who knows. Some people think about it, some people talk about it, some people act about it and some people are it and there's layers. I mean, I've talked to a lot of people who think about starting a business and business might not even be right for them. I'm just saying as an example.

Kevin Palmieri:

I've talked to a lot of people who talk about it.

Kevin Palmieri:

Oh yeah, no, I could do that. I'm gonna do that. This is how I would do it. It's like awesome. Some people act about it and they pretend that there's something they're not. And then some people become it. Some people are it, and I think when you are it and you're becoming it, that's when, if somebody was around you, they would be like holy shit, you're not messing around, like this is real, you're really in this, you're not just talking it. Yeah, I don't know, this is what I want to dedicate my life to that. And if you're not, then maybe that's a sign. Maybe it's a sign it's time to pivot. Maybe it's a sign that you got to get your shit together. Maybe it's a sign that you don't love this as much as you thought. Those are all potential opportunities to go in a different direction. I talk about this because it sounds really cool, but when I was training to fight mixed martial arts, I didn't want it bad enough.

Kevin Palmieri:

I just didn't, I didn't want it bad enough. I never would have been successful with the effort that I was putting. Do you know you didn't because I wanted to skip. I would skip sessions and I think it to me it was cooler to talk about it than it was to do it. I enjoy doing it, but I enjoy talking about it that's more than doing it.

Alan Lazaros:

That's a thing right there for sure. If you enjoy talking about it more than doing it, that's definitely an indicator.

Kevin Palmieri:

Something.

Alan Lazaros:

Remember we, kevin and I, behind the scenes, we have certain hashtags. We've said for eight years Hashtag whatever it takes.

Kevin Palmieri:

You and.

Alan Lazaros:

I have been sending to each other for eight years, and what we mean by that is I would lose an arm for this for sure.

Kevin Palmieri:

In a heartbeat.

Alan Lazaros:

For sure, and I know that that sounds cocky and or dumb, but there have been times where, at our own detriment, we put the podcast above ourselves and if we didn't, we wouldn't have gotten here, and I just I don't know if you know. Okay, so this I think it will will land. I did three fitness shows and Kevin knew I would lose several of them. I have a trophy behind me. I won one of them and I I won my class and my overall. So I won the whole thing and that was a dream come true. I was really grateful. But I did three shows. The first one, I lost, got fifth. Second one, I got first and won the overall. And then third one I got fourth and lost pretty handedly.

Alan Lazaros:

And before the show, kevin said you're gonna fucking lose, and he wasn't being unkind, he was trying to help me understand that I was gonna lose this. That's sometimes how I feel when people's actions are not aligned with what I, what I'm aware it will take to succeed, and it's really hard to explain it Seriously. You tried to tell me, but I believed I would win. I genuinely thought that I was lean enough to win, and then I got all the feedback and I was like, okay, I got fucking stomped. And then the time when I did win before it, you were like, yeah, you're going to crush everybody, and I did.

Alan Lazaros:

And I did win before it you were like, yeah, you're going to crush everybody, and I did. And I didn't even believe you. I was very humble. I was like I don't know man, I lost last time. So I got to.

Alan Lazaros:

I mean, we'll see right, and I did, I stomped everybody and now in hindsight it wasn't really that close of that whole thing is, when I meet someone or, for example, again back to the speech yesterday I can get a sense that they will or will not succeed. Now, anything can change. So if they have a new mentor or a new coach or a life altering experience, like anything can change. You knew that I'd lose the show based on your statistical calculation, even if it was unconscious that I wasn't lean enough to win. When you have high awareness and you meet people, you can tell whether or not they're going to succeed or not based on and this is a good question too that, I think, is really powerful, similar to yours if someone had a camera on you, something along the lines of what is it? Again, someone had a camera on you. Do your actions align with your goals?

Kevin Palmieri:

Yeah, it's something like that. Would they believe in what you say you want? That If there was somebody following you around 24-7, would they believe in what you say you really, really, really want Right?

Alan Lazaros:

Based on your actions.

Kevin Palmieri:

And again, that's not my. This is not my. Yes based on your actions. This is not my thing. Somebody shared this. I don't know who the author of this is, but it was not me.

Alan Lazaros:

I did not create this and so one of the things that's been challenging is similar to the challenge you had with me is how are you supposed to? Kevin would have had to convince me that I was inaccurate, convince me that I was going to lose and then teach me how to win all within a matter of a couple weeks. And when I was with these kids yesterday, I was trying to think to myself, like, what do they need to hear so that they can understand that they're going to lose the show? And I don't mean to be mean, but they're going to lose a bunch of shows. The question is, how many and for how long before they smarten up? And if I was 20, what would I have been open to? Or if Kevin was 20, what would he have been open to? And how could I show them that your dreams are possible? But not unless you change X, y, z and so this hashtag, whatever it takes thing I had mentors, but I didn't want mentors. I had, I did work, but I didn't want to work.

Alan Lazaros:

And I think that there's this willingness piece to goals that I don't think people understand. So I get a new client. I just got one new. It'll be interesting. He's brand new, we'll see we're going to set up his goals, metrics, habits, skills and identity Goals, priorities, metrics, habits and skills. And then I'm going to find out if he aligns with it and most likely he won't, because that's what people do and then he's going to, we're going to go to the drawing board and say, okay, well, here's your system, you didn't do it, why not?

Alan Lazaros:

And then there's internal blocks and I think that when it comes to goals, it's a mathematical equation. It doesn't matter what you think or feel. You have to do it. Like what's a good example of this? It doesn't matter if we want a podcast or not. If we want to succeed at the highest level, we have to podcast. It's better if we want to. It's better if we set ourselves up in a position where we actually enjoy it.

Alan Lazaros:

But ultimately, it doesn't matter whether or not kevin and I want to record today. We have to record today if we want the goal. If we don't want the goal, we don't have to fucking do anything. And I think that that's a very fundamentally misunderstood thing. I always ask myself willingness. There are certain things that we could do to be more successful that I'm not willing to do. I've had to draw that line in the sand and I know we are less successful because I'm not willing to sell out or XYZ or network with this person or whatever. What is your willingness level? How willing are you to do the things that are hard and necessary to achieve your goals? Because I think that it is arrogant like me before that show I lost to say I'm going to win but then simultaneously not do everything necessary to actually win.

Kevin Palmieri:

Well, you did what you thought was necessary.

Alan Lazaros:

I was wrong.

Kevin Palmieri:

That's what makes it hard. Sometimes you don't know. Well, why didn't?

Alan Lazaros:

I listen to you.

Kevin Palmieri:

Because you're an idiot.

Alan Lazaros:

No, seriously though.

Kevin Palmieri:

Maybe I didn't do a good enough job of convincing you. Maybe you were hard-headed, I don't know.

Alan Lazaros:

I think it was a combination of I was arrogant and delusional and I think that you were not effective in your communication.

Kevin Palmieri:

I think Matt told you too. I remember we were yeah that was brutal. A night or two before, I don't remember. It was the week of the show you were posing at the gym and Matt before I don't remember. It was the week of the show. You were posing at the gym and Matt and I were standing next to each other and we're like, oh no, like, brother, you're in trouble. Yeah, we're leaner than you right now and we're just dieting for fun like we're this is gonna be bad.

Alan Lazaros:

We're. This is bunny meets the blade here. Yeah, Matt was behind. He was. He was very kind to me in that because he was my uh, when you, when you're backstage, you always have someone with you. And the show that I won he was my guy and we crushed together. That was that was fun experience with matt. He was like dude, you just fucking stomped everyone. It was awesome, and he had done that the year before when I lost, so he knows what the feeling. And then the the last one. He was just trying to be kind because he knew I was fucked.

Kevin Palmieri:

Matt is the type of person he gives it to you. It depends. If you need it, he'll give it to you, real?

Alan Lazaros:

But I don't know. He knows there's nothing you can do two days out.

Kevin Palmieri:

Yeah, I know You're in trouble.

Alan Lazaros:

Yeah, you're in trouble, you're in trouble.

Kevin Palmieri:

It's like you can only burn something so bad you can't really fix it. You burn of your pizza, you light it on fire. There's really not much you can do to fix that You're going to throw it out, let's just start over, Start over. So yeah, I would say next level lesson for this episode. I don't really know, because we went all over the place Next time. Sometimes what I do and again this is it's a fine line, right, it's a fine line. But I'll imagine Alan's watching me.

Kevin Palmieri:

I'll imagine taryn is in the office watching me when I don't want to do something and it's like, just just do it man, just do it I. I say I want it, I want it. I gotta prove to myself that I want it. So next time you have that little voice that says, yeah, I'm gonna go play bags on the quad and shotgun 15 beers not that alan's gonna do that, but maybe that's what I would have thought.

Alan Lazaros:

I would have shotgunned a few in college back in the day but I also didn't have any fitness results in college.

Kevin Palmieri:

That's fair to this extent. That would be the lesson for me is next time you have that voice, what's the overriding voice? What's the what is the highest self? What is the overriding voice? What is that voice that is just pulling for you and your goals and your fulfillment? Let's work on that a little bit more, because we all have to. Alan had to flex that in order to go home and do his calls. I drove by Dunkin' Donuts today and I could taste it. I was like, oh my goodness.

Kevin Palmieri:

Yeah, yeah yeah, there's coffee at home and, honestly, it's better. The coffee at home is better, the experience just isn't, so that's mine.

Alan Lazaros:

My next level lesson is your highest self. The best version of you is always trying to talk to you. You just got to listen to the whispers. You know what you should do. How often can you do what you should do instead of just what you? What feels good in the moment?

Alan Lazaros:

That is the base problem of goals is that and I used to say this in my fitness coaching days I gave a speech about fitness at one of the events seven years ago coaching days I gave a speech about fitness at one of the events seven years ago and I said you can have a six pack or drink a six pack, never both, and obviously some people there's exceptions, I get it right. You and I had a six pack and when we were drinking. But ultimately you get to hang out and drink beers or you get to be ripped and shredded and in great shape. You don't get to be both types of guys or both types of girls. You just don't you. You can't be both. You got to choose one and we all have that choice every single day. And it is.

Alan Lazaros:

It's tough, like it's really hard to achieve goals. I'm convinced of that. Anyone who says otherwise is lying to you. It's goals are hard to achieve, especially now with all these distractions and all that kind of stuff. If you have high goals, good for you, because if it was easy, everybody would achieve all their dreams, everyone would live on the beach, everyone would have a six pack Like. That's not the case, and the reason why is because it's brutal. And the reason why is because in those moments of weakness of I want to play bags in the quad, you have to say you know what?

Kevin Palmieri:

get your fucking ass in that office and do what you're meant to do, because that's what a responsible adult does for your family and for your team and for your community. I used to, if I was going to go drink, I'd have like a salad or something.

Alan Lazaros:

That was my secret, I just and then yeah, and then they would hit you quicker too, but that wasn't what I was doing as well.

Kevin Palmieri:

I'm a lightweight, but that wasn't what I was doing as well. I'm a. I'm a lightweight, so that wasn't why I was doing it, but it was more like okay, 130 calories per beer. Six would be six, uh, 780 calories. Okay, that's not bad. No wonder why you got hammered man. It's like when you don't eat a lot. I was doing it because I wanted to stay in shape. I see you.

Alan Lazaros:

I see you, and that's why you were in better shape.

Kevin Palmieri:

That's the base reason of why you were in better shape, but it also, I mean there's. You know, that's not how most people want to enjoy their beverages you were shredded. Well, I'm working my way back All right as always. We love you, we appreciate you, grateful for each and every one of tomorrow. Stay. Next level, next levelers. Thanks for joining us for another episode of Next Level.

Alan Lazaros:

University. We love connecting with the Next Level family. We mean it when we say family. If you ever need anything, please reach out to us directly. Everything you need to get a hold of us is in the show notes.

Kevin Palmieri:

Thank you again and we will talk to you tomorrow.

People on this episode

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Alan Lazaros

Host
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Kevin Palmieri

Host