Next Level University

The Truth About What You Need To Change In Order To Be More Successful (2059)

• Kevin Palmieri and Alan Lazaros

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In today’s episode of Next Level University, hosts Kevin Palmieri and Alan Lazaros explore the hard truth that real success requires real change. From fixed mindsets and fear of failure to emotional resilience and evolving self-worth, they unpack what truly holds people back and how to shift out of it. With personal stories, practical examples, and a few good laughs, this episode shows that growth is messy, but always worth it.

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NLU is not just a podcast; it’s a gateway to a wealth of resources designed to help you achieve your goals and dreams. From our Next Level Dreamliner to our Group Coaching, we offer a variety of tools and communities to support your personal development journey.

For more information, please check out our website at the link below. 👇

Website 💻  http://www.nextleveluniverse.com

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We love connecting with you guys! Reach out on Instagram, Facebook, or via email. We’re here to support you in your personal and professional development journey.

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Kevin: https://www.instagram.com/neverquitkid/
Alan: https://www.instagram.com/alazaros88/

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Alan@nextleveluniverse.com

LinkedIn ✍
Kevin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kevin-palmieri-5b7736160/
Alan: https://www.linkedin.com/in/alanlazarosllc/

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Show notes:
(4:27) From foreman to future builder
(6:40) Redefining retirement and purpose
(8:29) How mindset shapes success
(13:49) Kevin’s mall experiment for growth
(16:04) Next Level Dreamliner: The planner, agenda, journal, and habit tracker to rule them all. Get a copy: https://a.co/d/9fPpxEt
(21:29) How to start failing safely
(23:20) Identity wounds and self-worth
(25:11) Bombing on stage and recovering
(28:30) Overcoming unrealistic expectations
(30:35) Outro

Send a text to Kevin and Alan!

Kevin Palmieri:

One of the hardest parts of getting to this place of quote-unquote success is understanding, for me at least, that I had to change so much of myself, and I think a lot of us have a negative relationship with changing ourselves. We think, well, I like the way I am, or I should be able to get to the level of success I want without having to change, and honestly, that's just not realistic for any of us.

Alan Lazaros:

Real, sustainable success that is holistic is predicated on how much you grow as a person physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually and you cannot grow unless you are willing to change.

Kevin Palmieri:

Welcome to Next Level University. I'm your host, Kevin Palmieri, and I'm your co-host, Alan Lazarus. At NLU, we believe in a heart-driven but no BS approach to holistic self-improvement for dream chasers.

Alan Lazaros:

Our goal with every episode Alan Lazarus, self-belief, self-worth, self-awareness, relationships boundaries, consistency, habits and defining your own unique version of success. Self-improvement in your pocket, every day, from anywhere, completely free.

Kevin Palmieri:

Welcome to Next Level University, next level nation. Today for episode number 2059 the truth about what you need to change in order to be more successful. You said you wanted to interview me on this topic. We realized that in the past we did a lot more. You're on your fly on the wall of a conversation and then occasionally we get into like long monologues and we're just figuring out yeah, how do we, how would we have a conversation if we didn't know anybody was going to hear it? And that's kind of the goal for today At least.

Alan Lazaros:

I like that. I think that's where this started. I agree, I would like to go back that way.

Kevin Palmieri:

I said that's the goal.

Alan Lazaros:

That I would like to go back that way. I said to you earlier that's the goal. That's the goal Bring everyone behind the scenes. I said to Kevin earlier let's interview each other this week on something for two of the episodes Thoughts, question mark, topic of each other's choosing Question mark. He said love it. Well, first he actually said hold on. What did he actually say? He said L-O-V-E-I space T. And then he said love it correction. So here we are, now we're doing it.

Kevin Palmieri:

It's challenging when you're zipping through messages like oh, misspelled there.

Alan Lazaros:

Stephen Covey wrote a book called the Seven Habits of Highly Effective People and in that book he said everything's created twice once in the mind and once in reality. This was in my head. I texted Kev, what's up, kev? And now it's happening. And now I'm wasting everyone's time, okay, so Kevin and I talked off air and I said do you think you would have been successful had you not changed? Because you were a foreman for a weatherization company and you made six figures in your mid twenties and you achieved a far greater level of success than you had thought when you were at the gas station wondering if you were going to be a townie and all that stuff. I'll let you tell it, but kevin was someone who did not believe and he said this many times. So this is me saying what he said that he didn't think he'd be successful, he didn't think he was one of those people, he didn't think he'd have a mansion, he didn't think he'd be one of those different people. I still don't have a mansion, just if I are.

Alan Lazaros:

yeah so make sure everybody knows that, but you do believe now that those things are possible, at least possible for you right in the future. Okay, so at one point you didn't right. I remember we had a client and we were at their place and they do have a mansion and 48 acres and it's and there's an elevator in it. And kev said dude, there's a fucking elevator in this house. And I was like what does that even mean, brother? You're like well, how many people and this is what got it to land for me you said how many people are gonna go into a house that has an elevator in it? And I had never really thought about it. I guess, I guess, but that was never something in my dreams. That was definitely something that you wanted, eventually, or thought you used to watch Cribs.

Kevin Palmieri:

I thought it would be cool. Way back at TV Cribs. Yeah, I thought it would be cool for sure, right?

Alan Lazaros:

Okay, so eight years ago, you were my first guest on my podcast. I was your first guest and then we started to go off to the races together and we changed fucking everything. I mean, we just worked and went back to the drawing board and worked and went back to the drawing board and worked and went back to the drawing board. And this is working and this isn't working. And this is working and this isn't working. And what do we do and who do we need and who do we mentor and who do we get mentored by and what do we do? And it's been an iterative process for eight years now of what do we need to change, including a coaching call we did before this. What did you think was going to? What did you think your life was going to be versus what it is now?

Kevin Palmieri:

That's always a hard question, because I didn't really have any idea what it would be. Really have any idea what it would be. There was no when I got, so I went from making like 15 an hour doing house renovations to getting that job that eventually put me above six figures. I was convinced that that that was what I was going to do forever. That was, that was what I was convinced of, and I wonder, if I didn't start podcasting, if I ever would have thought of leaving that job. I don't know, I may never have thought of leaving that job.

Kevin Palmieri:

I knew there was an expiration date in terms of years Like you can only crawl around in attics for so long, but I took care of myself. I mean, I'm 36.

Alan Lazaros:

Was there a pension at that company, or 401k or any of that? God, no, no. Did you ever think about investing for your retirement or anything?

Kevin Palmieri:

Yes, so when I was a truck driver, slash forklift operator, you bought some. Apple right? Well, I did, but they had like 401k match and all that, and so I was aware of it. I just don't know how long I would have waited.

Alan Lazaros:

I think Emilie and I talked about this yesterday too. I think the idea of retirement is sort of invented in the industrial age and all that, and a lot of people. If you research this there's a lot of research on this A lot of people die earlier when they retire because they have less purpose.

Kevin Palmieri:

One of the channels we produce is a channel it's called Retirement Transformed and it's all. It's literally all about how they retired and the first year, a couple of years, they like drank bottles of wine for dinner and all this stuff and they ended up wildly miserable. And they talk about how retirement is a rediscovery phase, as opposed to like you just do nothing. Like you rediscover or discover for the first time parts of yourself that you just never had the time or space or awareness to do. So yeah, that's.

Alan Lazaros:

I think there's like a lot of science out there that talks about that yeah, for sure, when you lack purpose and you got to do something, right so you can only sit margaritas on the beach for so long before you want to build something. Okay, so for so. For you, one of the main questions, this topic, the point of this interview, is what did you need to change in hindsight, like what is very clear to you now? So, as someone who has built a business that is extremely successful, all things considered, in this industry, top 1% of 1% of 1% co-built I'll say co-built.

Alan Lazaros:

I did it all myself, damn it, I did it myself asshole, that's a movie quote but as someone who has co-built a very successful business, as someone who never thought that was in their future, what is so obvious in hindsight? Because we produce and or work with so I crunch these numbers every single day we're over 100 podcasters and business owners that we coach, produce, mentor, I mean, just work with consistently Month over month. We work with them all consistently. So you kind of have a good idea now at this point what's going to win, what's not, what's going to win, what's not, what works, what doesn't. So what is obvious in hindsight? That you just had to change if you wanted to be successful.

Kevin Palmieri:

One, the easiest one for me to get to is always I had a super, super fixed mindset. I mean, I was convinced I was the way I was and I was going to be that way forever and there was nothing I could do to change that. That was a massive one.

Alan Lazaros:

When did?

Kevin Palmieri:

that pivot After I read Mindsets by Carol Dweck. At least it started.

Alan Lazaros:

When did it start to?

Kevin Palmieri:

pivot, then Then when did you read?

Alan Lazaros:

that I don't even remember. So, when you were playing MLB Grand Slam or whatever it is, I don't know, and you were listening to Rich Dad, poor Dad, you don't think it was shifting then? Not really.

Kevin Palmieri:

No, not really, because if it was, you probably wouldn't have been listening to a book in the background. Look, I was multitasking. Some people would have the audacity to call that habit stacking. But I do it and I'm the asshole. You know what I mean.

Alan Lazaros:

But I do it the way I want to do it.

Kevin Palmieri:

Yeah, and and I'm the bad guy were you absorbing the book less than I thought? For sure, but I? That was me. Look, if somebody came to me and said I want to get into audiobooks, I don't know how to do it, I wouldn't. I mean, I would what? I advise that? No, but I would say like, yeah, if that works for you, start the train. You can't do that forever, right, you're not gonna be able to. You not going to learn that much if every audio book you listen to is like the second thing you're doing while playing video games. But if that's how you started it and it got you into it, I'm an example that you can do that. And then eventually, you get rid of the crutches, you get rid of the training wheels. That would be one. Yeah, that would be one.

Alan Lazaros:

Second one I'm not done with that. One Real quick, Okay. Fixed mindset how? How does someone overcome a fixed mindset rather than some book Like how did you actually take that book and put it into practice?

Kevin Palmieri:

Man, I don't. I literally I took it personally how every example she used about a fixed mindset like hit me Like. I took that personally. It was like, oh my goodness, I could see myself in the classroom being the kid who doesn't ask questions how did you not see that as an attack, like when you read the book?

Alan Lazaros:

how did you not say fuck this book and throw it out the window because there was?

Kevin Palmieri:

no ego in it. It was coming from a what seemed like a very heart-driven research place. Not, it wasn't a dude screaming at me, it was a, a woman reading a book about how she studied all this. It was like, yeah, no, that's fair. Who recommended that book?

Alan Lazaros:

probably you, I'd have to guess. I don't know, I don't. I don't think so because that was never one of my main ones. I didn't understand. There's four mindsets that I use in my coaching there's fixed my, there's super fixed, fixed growth and super growth. And I coaching there's super fixed, fixed growth and super growth. And I found out there's actually restrictions to super growth. Super growth is basically you think you can do pretty much anything with everybody Fucking dumb. You can't. And you try to do everything because you think you can do anything and you realize through massive pain and failure, Aim too high, you get humble pie.

Alan Lazaros:

Aim too low, you don't grow. The super fixed mindset aims too low and doesn't grow. And the super growth mindset aims too high and eventually matures and realizes they're screwed if they don't make some changes. So both of us made changes Back to the fixed mindset thing. I don't think I recommended that book because that's not a book I recommend to this day.

Alan Lazaros:

Dude, I recommend books all the time, but I don't, and I honestly I think I probably should. I think that's a good place to start. I do. I think it's a great book, but it's not one of my go-tos.

Kevin Palmieri:

Maybe, maybe it was when, remember, I was, there was an app I used. I don't remember the name of it, but it would literally summarize a book for you and you can read an entire book. And again, you weren't reading it, but it was summarizing in like 15 minutes. I forget what it was called.

Alan Lazaros:

I could find it at some point. I think that's probably.

Kevin Palmieri:

It was probably 2018 so it was one of the recommended ones on the app, I think I. I think I searched mindset because I was looking for mindset books. I think that one came up. That's when I I don't think you recommended the four tendencies. No, I don't even know where that came from. Was it my Wonderful Wife? I think so I'll ask her. I don't remember. I don't remember.

Alan Lazaros:

One of our old listeners, Tom and Emily Maybe I think there was a bunch of books that that whole crew was circling through.

Kevin Palmieri:

I don't remember where it came from, I just remember resonating with it. I remember resonating with the fact of like I was, that I was kind of the person that was being used in the negative example, and then I think one of the best things I ever did. Again, you got to strike while the iron's hot and if you feel really high, in a high emotional state, you got to take action. I went through a really challenging breakup, as we've talked before, which led me to like my initial rock bottom, and it just got to the point where I was like okay, I need to get out of this funk. I don't this. This whole pity party I'm throwing for myself. It's gotten old. I'm the only buddy, the only person here that's partying like let me, let me figure this out how long did you stay in?

Kevin Palmieri:

the pity party. Honestly, not that. Probably a month, yeah, like not a crazy amount of time. But I remember I said, all right, I'm gonna get dressed up, I'm gonna go get a haircut, I'm gonna feel good about, I'm gonna go hit the gym, I'm gonna feel good about myself and I'm gonna go to the mall. I'm just gonna start going to start conversations with strangers, like that's what I'm going to do and we're going to see what happens.

Kevin Palmieri:

And I remember it was like I left with like an emotional high, like that was really not that bad. Everybody was super nice and I think I don't know if anybody's judging me. I think they're judging themselves and the fact that I'm so outgoing in this moment, that helped. I'm so outgoing in this moment, that helped me understand how to do it. That was. That was a really big piece of it. And the thing like the podcast at that point was just a fun passion project. So I had to have at least a little bit of a growth mindset to understand that I'm going to put this out there and see what happens and I think I can get better at it and I think I can improve and I think I can learn. I mean, I just learned how to do the podcasting thing, so I think I can get better at it and I think I can improve and I think I can learn. I mean, I just learned how to do the podcasting thing, so I think it all aligned at a really nice time where the podcast was something that pushed me into growth and it was something that would be. That would be that.

Kevin Palmieri:

I think the other thing that maybe the most important thing which is very attached to that is I have had to rebuild. I have had to break up with divorce, remarry, go to therapy with, go to counseling with my relationship with failure Like that has been maybe the biggest thing ever is just I hated failure. Failure was bad. Failure makes you a failure. Failure means you're a loser. It doesn't. It means you're not smart enough. You'll never be successful.

Kevin Palmieri:

That was one of the biggest things that I had to redesign and refocus on and rebuild my relationship with, because for most of my life, failure meant end of the road, not beginning of a brighter new road, and I've worked with a lot of people who have that oh, I can't fail, I'm gonna look bad. It's like no, you, if we do not fix this, you are in a lot, a lot, a lot of trouble. Trust me. I know I trust me. I know I don't want to fail either. I still don't like it, but now I appreciate it. It still sucks and it hurts, but now I know the benefits of it. I don't wake up and say, all right, let's go fail today, but when it happens which it's going to I think I just have a better relationship with it at this point.

Alan Lazaros:

Hello, hello, hello. Nlu listener. Thank you, as always, for listening to Next Level University. Real quick, I just want to jump in and let you know about the Next Level Dreamliner. This is a journal that I use every single day. Achieve your dreams 90 days at a time. It breaks down your dreams into goals, milestones and daily habits. We hope you enjoy it. The link will be in the show notes. Two things came up. One you, emilia's family is, her dad's an entrepreneur and he has something called KIP. Keep it positive, k-i-p, keep it positive. And I think that that's where you got to start if you're in negative town, but then eventually you can't just be positive all the time. You also got to play defense as well as offense. That's why it's so confusing, because if anyone out there watching or listening here is well, maybe I should get dressed up, get a haircut and go to the mall, like it depends where you are.

Alan Lazaros:

I mean if you and I did that today, that would be a mistake for our company because you're doing more. I had a. Let me share this briefly. I had a client reach out to me. He said this yesterday you know who you are, brother. He said Bot domain for blank Blank. Blank Got my email for blank. Got my Zoom account for blank. Calendly is set up. Workout app done Check, check, check, check, check, check, check. Sent me an audio 47 seconds. He said, brother, that took me months back in the day when I started my first business. I just did it in three hours and I said this. I said yeah, man, that's the power of personal development. It's insane what you become capable of as your work on your self-compounds.

Kevin Palmieri:

Be nice if I can fucking read. Oh my god, I always get nervous when I'm. When I'm. When it's my turn to read something on the podcast, it's like all right, I gotta slow down here, I'm gonna mess this up.

Alan Lazaros:

Well, you know, one of the 26 impact points of effective communication is pacing, thanks to kev. Yeah, man, that's the power of personal development. It's insane what you become capable of. You'd think I didn't write this. I actually write right with this, and I can't even talk of as your work on yourself compounds whoa. I accomplish more in one week now than I used to in six months. Wild, and I don't know if my point of this is like eight years ago you went to the mall and that was progress. That would not be progress today. That'd be a terrible idea today. So so how do you?

Kevin Palmieri:

explain. Yeah, but here's the thing it would still be progress if we elevated it. If we elevated it so it was outside of the comfort zone, it still could be progress.

Alan Lazaros:

What like have an NLU booth in the middle of the mall or something?

Kevin Palmieri:

If I went up to some like if the thing we decided to do is all right, we're going to do a new content strategy. Kev, I want you to go to the mall and I want you to walk up to somebody and say hey, when did you stop chasing your?

Alan Lazaros:

dreams that that would be uncomfortable. Whoa Right that that would be uncomfortable.

Kevin Palmieri:

Whoa, right, and I'm recording. Somebody doesn't have to ask if we can. It wouldn't be you, because that that would be a whole thing, right, then there's two of us, that's a whole thing. But yeah, that I mean that whole process of hey. I would love to ask you a question. It's a little bit deep and it's going to be used on social media. I probably wouldn't start there, right, because that wouldn't work, most likely. But but that level of discomfort or outside of comfort zone, I think it can be constructive.

Alan Lazaros:

Okay, so that's the fixed mindset. Where do you think you are now? Super fixed, fixed growth or super growth?

Kevin Palmieri:

I still, embarrassingly, have moments where things go wrong. I feel like a failure and I start to question my capabilities Way less than ever. But something happened last week I don't remember what it was my when, my state, when my state goes down, I start to question my abilities. So it's still not fully locked in that, no matter what, there is a level of malability, malleability, whatever the proper like, you can adjust and you can mold yourself and you can work on yourself, even if it's a little bit, a little bit, a little bit. So it's the best it's ever been, but it's probably at like a I don't know seven out of 10.

Alan Lazaros:

That's how I always felt in relationships.

Alan Lazaros:

Just constantly what the like, why I don't get it right, but I never. I don't have that as much. I don't have that with the capabilities thing, but I definitely do when it comes to relationships. It's why does this? I don't understand what just happened. Why are you upset with me? I don't. It makes no sense, okay, uh, and again, I think everyone out there has either one of those two or both. I think a lot of people have both. Okay. Next piece was you had mentioned what your relationship with failure. So how did you change that?

Kevin Palmieri:

Unfortunately, this is always the unfortunate part. I just had failures, small ones, small ones, is always the unfortunate part. I just had failures, small ones, small ones. If you're afraid of failure, maybe the best place to start is by starting at a place of failing where you're not afraid that. That's the best, the best advice I can give do something stupid. That's, it's silly. To you like, well, I don't really care if it goes wrong. Okay, cool, let go again.

Kevin Palmieri:

I don't know if I have a really good example of this because it's very personal, it depends. But go get rejected in a way that does not hurt your self-esteem. The thing that helped me was try like almost trying to get rejected in ways expecting to get rejected. So it's not a surprise that I don't. I don't know if I have any really good, tangible takeaways.

Kevin Palmieri:

There's a there was a ted talk by I think it was this guy who 100 rejections, yeah, tried to get rejected 100 times and I remember he went into like a donut shop and said, hey, can you make like a donut in? Like the, the olympic rings, expecting to get rejected, and a lot of the times he expected to get rejected he didn't and what he learned about himself was. He was avoiding all sorts of opportunities based on the fact that he thought he was going to get rejected. And then when he did get rejected, he didn't. It didn't hurt him nearly as bad as he thought, and I just think it's. And I failed gently and then that allowed me and built the foundation for me to get rejected less gently and fail less nicely.

Alan Lazaros:

When we were kids, all of us developed these narratives and I've been learning a lot about this. There's a record playing you and I gave a speech in Pittsburgh where I tried to explain this. Some of us have the record playing of you got this, you can do it, you got this, you can do it. And those people need to stay very humble. That would be me. I basically think, yeah, I can do this, I got it. Yeah, I can do this.

Alan Lazaros:

So often my expectation is that it will go well and then it doesn't. But here's the thing when it doesn't go well, I don't say, oh, I'm not good enough. I go to the drawing board. What did I do wrong? Like what? Not me, it's not tied to me. What was the input that was ineffective? Yeah, and if you have a core wound similar to kev's anyone out there watching or listening it it basically validates your deepest fear and, for me, the unlovable core wound whenever something would go wrong with a friend or a family member and it didn't make any fucking sense it would have. It would be like, okay, I am not lovable or a good person, or a good friend or a good, and it would rock me. And I've witnessed you. You're like no, it's all whatever. Like that wasn't gonna work anyway.

Kevin Palmieri:

Well, it's not my, it's not my thing, right, yeah, exactly it's not I've seen you bomb speeches and you're just like, yeah, whatever man, like dude, no, like dude, no, I need to go lay down. I feel physically like I need to. I feel physically ill. We bombed a speech in well, it was a training more than a speech but I remember thinking like I don't know if I'm ever going to be able to do that again. Like that, I don't know if I'm ever going to be right.

Alan Lazaros:

What was I?

Kevin Palmieri:

like you didn't care at like excited. You're like fuck, yeah, seriously, yeah, we went and we got dominoes and we talked about it and you were just laughing. I remember we, we did it, we left. It was like it was like, uh, we had just won the super bowl in the well, the super bowl's play, we had just won the championship game in the, and we were the away team in the home team's arena and we were just walking down the tunnel and people might have might as well have been thrown throwing beer at us like it was bad, and we were the away team in the home team's arena and we were just walking down the tunnel.

Alan Lazaros:

And people might as well have been throwing beer at us.

Kevin Palmieri:

It was bad, it was not good yeah, the walk of shame, the walk of shame. I remember when we got into the car and sat down, you and I just looked at each other and started laughing hysterically, just laughing hysterically.

Alan Lazaros:

Yeah, that one. You let me be the front runner on.

Kevin Palmieri:

It was just that you just slunked into the corner, man. I remember I said look, man, you're going to have to take this. Yeah, this is on you, self-preservation. You were no different. You were no different than you were before.

Alan Lazaros:

This is. I know we got to jump soon. I got an interview in five minutes. But I want to ask you this what can you say to people? Because here's the deal.

Alan Lazaros:

I, I had no idea that that was the way I was. Dude, I bombed my first I. I remember my first engineering course was fucking brutal. I mean I'm talking bad like signal analysis, like figuring out how your phone decodes signals from satellites, like it was fucking terrible. Okay, and these are the super geniuses of the world that just ruin every fucking bell curve.

Alan Lazaros:

And I partied the whole night before and I would just bomb these tests and I would be like, fuck, I have to find friends to help me. And I one of my roommates his name sean. He was top in the entire country in electronics, so we just had him teach us everything. Right, he was really good at that and it was oh, thank goodness, because if you don't get the right people around you, you are screwed. I mean, you're just screwed and that's facts. Like you got to get the right people around you if you want a certain outcome. And but I but I never was like, oh, I'm not smart enough. Never once did I question whether or not I could do it. I just questioned my approach. It didn't mean I'm not smart enough, it just meant my approach sucked Like, of course, you partied last night. That was dumb. Don't do that again, especially for this fucking class. I mean God, but for you it's's. You question your own abilities, you question your identity, it's, it's an identity thing.

Alan Lazaros:

I had no idea before kev that people are the way that I feel when a friendship goes bust is the way you feel after bombing a speech. You just feel terrible about yourself, you're confused and you're hurt and you you need to take a nap or whatever. Like lick your wounds, go go in a bubble and eat some food and watch a movie. That's what I do. What is it like to work with someone who isn't affected by failure?

Kevin Palmieri:

it's terrible, because that means we're guaranteed to get way more failure than I want. Slash maybe might be constructive. I don't. It's hard because I've never I mean, I've worked with you longer than I've worked with anybody, right? So yeah, it's. It's almost like there are certain icebergs that I can see that we're gonna hit. I knew we were gonna bomb that fucking training. I knew you didn't prep for. I knew we were gonna bomb that fucking training. I knew you didn't prep for. I knew we were gonna bomb that training. That's why I let you step out and stuff.

Alan Lazaros:

That's some good stuff. That's why I points of effective communication.

Kevin Palmieri:

That's why I let you step out and, like it's, kind of get hit by the train, because it's like you can handle it more than I can.

Alan Lazaros:

Yeah, to to make this more relevant to the listener. How many people out there are like me in this, giving advice in the personal development?

Kevin Palmieri:

space. I think most people in the self-improvement, personal development space, business space have super high self-belief.

Alan Lazaros:

They don't understand so how do you help people who are on your end? Yes, to filter through that shit.

Kevin Palmieri:

The fundamental Gary Vee had this video. I and again, I hated gary v for a long time. Then I loved him for a long time. All things considered, I think he does give pretty good advice, although it's often very simple. This guy was like yeah, I'm trying to get people to to give me money for my business. He's like how many people did you message, bro? And he's like dude, so many people. He's like, bro, how many people did you fucking message?

Alan Lazaros:

dude, so many I could, I couldn't how many he's like, bro?

Kevin Palmieri:

how many people did you fucking message Dude? So many I couldn't. How many he's like 10. He's like dude 10?, 10?. You need to message 1,000. That's what I would say. I wouldn't. I'd say 10's a really good start, my man, but that ain't going to do it. Let me give you the percentage Right.

Alan Lazaros:

You message 1, a thousand people, you might get ten people to get back to you.

Kevin Palmieri:

You message ten, this is totally normal. Yeah, yeah, no, it's totally normal.

Alan Lazaros:

You've been lied to. You just need to send some more messages. But I'd start very, very small. You've been lied to. I do think that's true. I think we've all been super lied to I do. I think so because from the outside in, everything's different from the inside out. It's so obvious, right? I mean, well, it's a great actress who's been doing it for 28 years before Divergent, and some people do actually pop off in three years. Yeah, rarely, rarely, that's the rarity. But no one comes out and says hey, by the way, I got lucky.

Kevin Palmieri:

Well, that's a piece of it. We highlight anomalies. Nobody wants to hear about the person. It took them 50 years to get success. Nobody wants to hear that. They want to hear about somebody who posted two videos and went viral and now I don't understand that at all. I want to hear about the 40 years of failure. A hundred percent, I know, but most people don't think they can fail for 40 years and then get successful. So it's like, of course, yeah, a hundred percent, of course, of course.

Alan Lazaros:

All right, well, this was fire.

Kevin Palmieri:

Yeah, I have a bunch more, so maybe we We'll see. I have one that I didn't mention that needs to be mentioned for sure.

Alan Lazaros:

Let's do it, we'll see.

Kevin Palmieri:

It's our show, let's do it. It is our show. Next Level Nation. If you are looking for a group of like-minded people, we will have the link in the show notes. As always. We love you, we appreciate you, grateful for each and every one of you, and at NLU we don't have fans. Next Level Nation and we will talk to you tomorrow.

People on this episode

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Alan Lazaros

Host
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Kevin Palmieri

Host