Next Level University

The 3 Times You’re Most Likely To Quit (2073)

• Kevin Palmieri and Alan Lazaros

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Dreams don’t follow straight lines. In today’s episode, Kevin and Alan unpack the five moments when people are most likely to give up. Through personal stories and practical insight, they’ll help you understand these quitting points and how to push past them. If you’ve ever felt like walking away from something important, this episode will remind you that the path forward isn’t about perfection, it’s about persistence.

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NLU is not just a podcast; it’s a gateway to a wealth of resources designed to help you achieve your goals and dreams. From our Next Level Dreamliner to our Group Coaching, we offer a variety of tools and communities to support your personal development journey.

For more information, please check out our website at the link below. 👇

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Show notes:
(2:48) The three most common quit points
(4:22) When doubt makes you question everything
(5:25) Handling criticism and embarrassment
(8:26) Letting go while holding the vision
(10:29) Embracing growth and role evolution
(11:27) Next Level Dreamliner: The planner, agenda, journal, and habit tracker to rule them all. Get a copy: https://a.co/d/9fPpxEt
(14:43) Battling perfectionism and self-criticism
(18:55) When success doesn’t feel like enough
(20:01) Adapt without quitting your dream
(21:40) Outro

Send a text to Kevin and Alan!

Kevin Palmieri:

I was making dinner the other night and I had a moment where I was thinking to myself right now I'm overwhelmed and there's a lot going on and there's mayhem, but like if there was ever a time for me to want to quit this, it would not be right now. And then I was thinking to myself okay, well, if I had to pinpoint the three times, that would most likely be the times when I quit. What would they be? And we're going to talk about that today.

Alan Lazaros:

When I quit, what would they be and we're going to talk about that today, If Kevin and I were to have quit on this journey, given up, not believed it would be worth it or not believed it was possible, if we had let self-doubt stop us, if we had lost momentum or taken years off, most of you would not know us today.

Kevin Palmieri:

Welcome to Next Level University. I'm your host, kevin Palmieri, and I'm your co-host, alan Lazarus. At NLU, we believe in a heart-driven but no BS approach to holistic self-improvement for dream chasers.

Alan Lazaros:

Our goal with every episode is to help you level up your life, love health and wealth.

Kevin Palmieri:

We bring you a new episode every single day on topics like confidence, self-belief, self-worth, self-awareness, relationships, boundaries, consistency, habits and defining your own unique version of success.

Alan Lazaros:

Self-improvement in your pocket, every day, from anywhere, completely free.

Kevin Palmieri:

Welcome to Next Level University, next Level Nation today for episode number 2073, I don't. That's a really weird number, is that right? 2073? The three times you're most likely to quit. As I mentioned, I was cooking dinner the other night and I was overwhelmed. But I was thinking I'd rather be overwhelmed with the things I'm overwhelmed with today than overwhelmed with what I was overwhelmed with five years ago. And were there times I wanted to quit? Not really. What were you cooking? I'll give you one guess.

Alan Lazaros:

What I was cooking Chicken and rice.

Kevin Palmieri:

It was ground turkey.

Alan Lazaros:

And rice.

Kevin Palmieri:

I don't consider cooking rice because you just throw it in there and click a button. I actually physically cooked the turkey, so that's what I was cooking. You do a little ground turkey. Throw some taco seasoning in there. Off to the races. That's all you need Nice. That's it. A little ground turkey.

Alan Lazaros:

I respect it.

Kevin Palmieri:

Yeah, keep it simple. And then a giant bag of brussels sprouts. It's pretty much what I eat every day. Nice, see it. I flexed for youtube. I'm I'm not pooping if you're listening. So I was thinking, okay, what if I had to? And I'm curious to what yours are these, these are mine and this is my the three times where I think most people want to quit One before they start.

Kevin Palmieri:

So before you even start something, you convince yourself that you're not capable of doing it. You say you know what, I don't really actually care about this. And then you make up excuses and you justify it. I didn't really care about it anyway. I feel like it's a lot of work and we just make excuses. So that's part one. Part I feel like it's a lot of work and we just we just make excuses. So that's part one.

Kevin Palmieri:

Part two is when the novelty of it wears off. So Alan mentioned and I said, yeah, brother, I know he's like, yeah, man, I started business growth, uh, business growth university. And he's like I'm only two episodes in and it's already kind of worn off. It's like, yeah, it's, it's not as exciting as it was in the very beginning and I said, dude, I'm 152 or whatever episodes into podcast growth university. I have moments where it's like what the hell am I going to talk about today? And we've done 150. I've done an episode every week for the last three years Almost. What am I going to? What am I going to talk about?

Kevin Palmieri:

The novelty something then you find something and you're always grateful after yeah that's, that's key.

Kevin Palmieri:

That's key the novelty do it. If you do it, the novelty is worn off. The novelty is has worn off. And that's another time when people quit because it's like, oh yeah, no, I thought this, this, the sexiness was going to last forever and it was always going to be the sexy thing to do. No, no. And I think this one is not necessarily a sign that you should actually quit. It's a sign that you got to go back to the drawing board and really get clarity when you start to doubt whether or not it'll be worth it, when you start to doubt whether or not you actually care enough about the results.

Kevin Palmieri:

Great example when I my I did one bodybuilding show and I was planning on doing another one and I was, I don't know, maybe a month out from my show and I was fucking miserable, miserable. And I had that conversation of, like I don't know if I actually want to do this, I don't think it's actually worth it. And once I said that, like, do I think it's worth it to continue suffering for the next four weeks? I decided no. And once I said that, like, do I think it's worth it to continue suffering for the next four weeks? I decided no. And then I did not do the show. I texted my coach and I said I'm done, I'm not doing it.

Kevin Palmieri:

The second it doesn't become worth it. I think we have to revisit, at least revisit, and go back to the drawing board and figure okay, why is it not worth it? Is it? Has circumstances changed? Has our awareness changed? Were our expectations different in the beginning? So that, from my perspective, those are probably the three spots where people quit the most Before you start, because you just count yourself out when the novelty wears off which it is going to do, unfortunately and then when doubt of whether or not it's actually worth it creeps in.

Alan Lazaros:

There's a quote that says it's attributed to Winston Churchill I don't know if it actually was him or not, and again, but the quote's really powerful which is, success is going from failure to failure without losing enthusiasm. And the reason why I think that's a good quote is because one of the things that you didn't mention in your three is there's two others that my mind came up with while you were talking. One of them is when you get shit on by loved ones. When you get made fun of for your business or your podcast or your fitness journey or what you're posting, whatever it is, whatever endeavor, whatever you have. When you get made fun of. That is tough, it's a tough moment and that's usually from embarrassment. Whenever you get embarrassed my first fitness show I thought I'd win and I came in fifth. I felt so embarrassed. And that is when it's like fuck, oh, my goodness, what if I do that again? And the other one that came up. One is when you're embarrassed. The other one is when you meet failure, external results, failure. So when you realize that you're everything you thought would work isn't going to work. That would be the second one. And when you realize that this is Mount Everest, this is not going to work the way that I thought it would. What's a good example of this? Okay, so this will be a weird example.

Alan Lazaros:

I thought about this earlier. Everything in life is so damn hard because of duality. People say, well, you got to believe in yourself and you got to never let go of your dream. And then other people say, well, you got to know when to quit. Both are true.

Alan Lazaros:

So I was getting ready for the day earlier and I have these new shirts that I really love and I put on this one that I fucking hate. I hate it Every time I put it on. We all have those shirts or those articles of clothing where, when you put it on, you're like I fucking hate this shirt. This shirt sucks. And I sat there and I had a moment with myself. I said, well, I just bought it. I was $27. Ellen, you're going to hate the shirt forever, aren't you? Yeah, just fucking donate it. Move on. Don't wear a shirt you hate for the rest of your life. Just fucking move on.

Alan Lazaros:

And I had this moment. I brought it out to the garage into our donation pile. Our housekeepers shout out to them they take our donations. I'm very grateful and well-paid housekeepers, our donations. I'm very grateful and well-paid housekeepers, by the way. I want to make that clear. Also, I had this moment coming back from the garage after putting my shirt that I had just bought. This is a fairly new shirt. Okay, this was wasteful, it was dumb, I shouldn't have bought it, but I also didn't know I was going to hate it.

Alan Lazaros:

I came in from the garage and I sat there and I said that is such an interesting concept. You have to hold on so fucking tightly to the future vision that you have but be so wildly adaptive along the way. Nlu Next Level University. It started out as the hyper-conscious podcast Change the way you think, change the way you act, change the way you live. It started out as conversations change lives, be a fly on the wall to learn how to reach your potential.

Alan Lazaros:

It started out as a completely different brand. It started out with you and I fishing every Father's Day, but we never let go of the vision. The vision stayed. The mountain we were climbing stayed, even though it was blurry. But along the way, the rebranding, the restructuring, the team, the people, the listener, the ideal listener next level university podcast growth university, business growth university that's one of the hardest parts and I think why a lot of people quit. Why a lot of people quit? You have to hold on so tightly to the ultimate dream and never, ever, ever, ever, ever let go of it. But along the way, along the journey, you have to be willing to donate a shirt you fucking hate.

Kevin Palmieri:

And there's going to be a lot of those not real shirts, but, in this case, a real shirt and there's going to be a lot of those. There's a lot of things that we used to do. I'm not on meetups anymore. That's weird. That's an evolution. There's a reason I'm not on meetups anymore. It's not because I don't want to be. It's because there are other things that require time. Somebody asked me shout out to Charlie the other day. Charlie's a member of the community and someone we work with on the website design front. She said what's it like for you not to have anything to do with the nlu website? And she's I'm just curious like was it hard for you to let go? And I was like it was weird for me to let go because I built the first website, the first website we had. It was terrible, it wasn't good. It's not like I'm saying kev's the best at zero to one, zero to one.

Alan Lazaros:

I'll get you there. Then I'll go start something else. Can't scale a fucking thing. No, no, I'll start it and then.

Kevin Palmieri:

I then I go, I just let it, I just let a ghost ride into the wall, but I said it was, it's really weird, but it's really cool. It's really weird because it's relatively new, but it's really cool because I, I don't, I don't want to have my hands in everything anyway. So that's an evolution that needs to happen and that's an evolution that I need to get comfortable with anyway. That's by necessity. So to your point, like that's within the thought process of we have to make sure we're focused, hyper-focused, on the stuff that matters the most, and you're the coach and you're the trainer, anyway, you should be doing those and I'm out talking to podcasters and so, yeah, just to speak to that point, I think that's, that's super important. And yes, I think yes, when you get kicked in the face and you have failure, of course that's a common, that's a common one for sure. What was the other one you said?

Alan Lazaros:

oh embarrassed embarrassed when you get made fun of. Hello, hello, hello. Nlu listener, thank you always for listening to Next Level University. Real quick, I just want to jump in and let you know about the Next Level Dreamliner. This is a journal that I use every single day. Achieve your dreams 90 days at a time. It breaks down your dreams into goals, milestones and daily habits. We hope you enjoy it. The link will be in the show notes. People have a really hard time being made fun of Understandable. Yeah, I've been made fun of so much. I didn't realize this, but you've been posting a lot of nostalgic stuff lately. A lot of the stuff I was made fun of for way back was actually working really well.

Kevin Palmieri:

Like what Fitness content, fitness stuff, content stuff yeah, fitness content I.

Alan Lazaros:

I remember being ripped a new one and made fun of repeatedly and, in hindsight, looking at some of those videos with the podcast audio in the background while I'm lifting whoa imagine if those good shit people just weren't in your life and you never would have questioned you just never would have questioned it I know that's so wild.

Alan Lazaros:

The hardest part of life, my opinion, is figuring out what data to take in and what to ignore. People say, oh well, you got to listen to the people, you got to listen to feedback. Customer's always right Bullshit, it depends who your customer is. But you got to take in the data. You just can't. You have to sift through what is and isn't. I know that's a different episode. So we have five times when people quit. We have before you start, because you don't think it'll work out or you're scared. Second one is when the novelty wears off and fyi everyone. I am still enthused about business growth, university, so much in fact, I'm going to plug it at the end of this episode. However, it there was a moment of okay, I'm going to plug it at the end of this episode. However, there was a moment of okay, I'm going to do this forever now.

Kevin Palmieri:

Well, yeah, I should have let you probably speak about it. That's on me.

Alan Lazaros:

No, no stress, no stress, but I do, I think it's cool that we Alan hates it.

Kevin Palmieri:

You have to start a podcast and now he fucking hates it.

Alan Lazaros:

I definitely don't, but it's definitely turning into another part of the grind. But it's definitely turning into another part of the grind and I need to bring the enthusiasm. But I think that's attitude and you have to work on that. But I'm grateful to do it and sometimes it's okay. This is a thing now and I have to figure out how to incorporate this into every single week from now on. And then I got to put the links on the website to make the PDFs downloadable. I mean, there's a lot of shit that goes with it and I'm not making that wrong, but okay.

Alan Lazaros:

So number one is before you start, you're scared. That's when you're most likely to quit. If you get through that, when the novelty wears out, you might quit again when you realize it's a huge mountain. The other one is the one I said, which is you're going to get made fun of. Someone's going to make fun of you, even if it's indirect. They're going to talk behind your back, for sure, for sure.

Alan Lazaros:

The fourth one that you said is what and what was your third? When you doubt, it'll be worth it. When you start doubting, it'll be worth it. And then the other one is when you just get kicked in the teeth with failure when you realize everything you're doing is not going to work, not the way you thought. Right, I just came up with another one and this is kind of a side tangent. I'll go quick with it.

Alan Lazaros:

When you review your own work it is so challenging we don't talk about this that often, but when you review your own Podcast Growth University episodes I just reviewed Business Growth University episode two earlier I know intellectually that it's really really good. I've been doing this a long time. If I were to compare it to someone else who just started a podcast, it's very good and I know that's really really good. I've been doing this a long time. If I were to compare it to someone else who just started a podcast, it's very good and I know that's very, very valuable content and I notice every little thing that I want to improve. I said so, and okay, way too many times because I'm so used to talking to you.

Kevin Palmieri:

Yeah, same, same. I know the feels, brethren. I know the feels. In the very beginning, I had a moment where I was like I don't know if I could do this, I don't know if I'm going to be able to do this. How'd you get through that? How'd you not quit? I told you I would do an episode every week forever. So I was like I'm going to have to figure it out. That's the public accountability Pretty much. Yeah, it's huge. That's why it's so big. I would love.

Alan Lazaros:

I pictured in my head Kevin doing Podcast Growth University for the very first time. Imagine doing what 1,500 episodes with me and you.

Kevin Palmieri:

It was like 1,000. It was like 1,000. Because this was three years ago I started. Believe it or not, I'm 150 episodes in 52 times.

Alan Lazaros:

Right, almost three years okay, so you've done a thousand with guests and or you also did other shows plus with me. Yeah, so thousand plus episodes where you're talking to other people on the microphone and then it's just you. Yeah, I would love to have been a fly on the wall for that moment. When you got that, that moment of ah, hmm, do I suck?

Kevin Palmieri:

am I the fucking?

Alan Lazaros:

worst that inner dialogue of? Am I going to be able to do this? Is this going to be terrible? Is alan going to review this and think it's awful? Is everyone going to think I suck and again I don um? What was that like for you and how did you?

Kevin Palmieri:

get through it. That is still my thought. I was like I think, do people hate me, or do people do people like me? Do people hate me? I don't know. I feel like sometimes I get really good feedback, other times I don't get any feedback. So I don't. How do you know? I just went back to. Well, it took me 150 episodes interviewing to feel like I was remotely good at podcasting. So let's just see how long it takes. This time it was only like five or ten episodes. So in the beginning it was just like let's see what happens. I mean, you're going to do this, so you're going to have to figure it out. It was that. And I think the other thing too. I don't know if this will land for anybody else. It's not. It's not the main, main, main thing. So I don't obsess over it.

Alan Lazaros:

That much Does your brain say. I can't do this Like what's your go-to when you're, when you're struggling with self-doubt or you're thinking about quitting. What does your brain do?

Kevin Palmieri:

Yeah, it says that you can't. I can't do this, you can't do this, no way that.

Alan Lazaros:

Yeah, that's terrible.

Kevin Palmieri:

It's the worst that sounds terrible, but I think you can.

Kevin Palmieri:

Again. It's like you know, I know that wasn't great. Thank you, brain, I appreciate that. Yeah, it wasn't great, but great, thank you, brain, I appreciate that. Like, yeah, it wasn't great, but like I feel like you're missing out on a lot of proof here, like, don't forget about the 1500 other episodes, like the. The comeuppance should be quicker, sir. The comeuppance, the comeuppance, the comeuppance, whatever it is, it should be term, it should be quicker. I have more reps. Like I just got to figure out the new flow do you think that would go away eventually?

Kevin Palmieri:

I sure as shit hope. So, yeah, I don't think it's gonna damn, that's a surprise you eventually, you know, another time, another time you might want to quit when you get everything you think you thought you wanted and realize it doesn't fucking matter at all. It doesn't change anything externally, it does. But if you're like, yeah, when I get x amount of dollars per month, I'm gonna feel good about myself, no, nope, no, you're not, no, you're not, but I have x amount in the bank account?

Kevin Palmieri:

yeah, no no, I can tell you that we had a goal amount when we hit and it was like when we hit that amount in the bank, everything's gonna be fine. And, honestly, it does change me a lot, because when I have certainty I feel really good. Life is overall better, but but I still have the same, if not more, amount of problems than I did before. So but that is a pretty I mean, it's a privilege to be able to fall back on that. I understand, I know I'm making light of that, but I think that's another time when you think there's some, there's something so beautiful about accomplishing something that you dreamed of, and then there is such a hangover after of like, oh, okay, so that's, that's what that feels like. And now I have to do this forever. Yeah, now it's, it's like okay so there will there will never be a scratch the ticket.

Kevin Palmieri:

Win a million dollar moment. No, it's not gonna. It's not gonna work that way, because then you, you have to deliver on that million dollar moment in order to receive the million dollars in this analogy. All right, what's your next little lesson? I gotta call in one minute. Whoa, yeah, it goes by fast.

Alan Lazaros:

Sorry about that my next level lesson is number one don't quit and adapt along the way. Don't quit on your vision. Don't quit on your dreams. Don't quit and adapt along the way. Don't quit on your vision. Don't quit on your dreams. Don't quit on your goals. Attach to the outcome of the goal, the vision, the dream. However, be adaptive along the way and be willing to evolve and grow.

Kevin Palmieri:

Mine would be if you do get to a place where you feel like quitting, you're not alone I think that is way more common than anybody admits and hopefully, eventually you get to a place where you remember what it was like to think that but not have it anymore, like there's no part of me that's imagining quitting on this, like that doesn't really matter how bad it gets I don't think it could be as bad as it was so that for me it's like that's good, I like that. I like that. All right, cool. If one of the things you want to journal about is why not to quit, that's my bad.

Kevin Palmieri:

My pen just jumped right out of there. That means I've been using it, though. We have the next level dreamliner. It is on Amazon. It literally takes five minutes. I dreamlined today for the first time in a hot minute, and when I got to the end I was like I can't believe I've been putting that off because I feel I've felt overwhelmed when it comes to time. I'm not kidding, it took me three minutes. I'm not bullshitting you. So it's something that you can start sustainably and you can maintain, even slash, especially when you are overwhelmed.

Alan Lazaros:

For the podcasters out there Podcast Growth University every single week. How to grow your podcast. For the business owners out there Business Growth University Every single week from now on. How to Grow your Business. Reach your potential Next Level University. Reach your podcast potential Podcast Growth University. Reach your business potential Business Growth University Boom.

Kevin Palmieri:

All right, as always. We love you, we appreciate you, grateful for each and every one of you and at NLU, we don't have fans, we have family. We will talk to you all tomorrow.

Alan Lazaros:

Keep it Next Level, next Level Nation.

Kevin Palmieri:

Thanks for joining us for another episode of Next Level University. We love connecting with the Next Level family.

Alan Lazaros:

We mean it when we say family. If you ever need anything, please reach out to us directly. Everything you need to get a hold of us is in the show notes.

Kevin Palmieri:

Thank you again and we will talk to you tomorrow.

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Alan Lazaros

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Kevin Palmieri

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