Next Level University

What If You’re Not Committed Enough To Your Goals (2079)

• Kevin Palmieri and Alan Lazaros

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Commitment is choosing to go all in. In today’s episode, Kevin and Alan get radically honest about what real commitment looks like. From stories of hotel room sacrifices to tracking every second of a client’s exam even while feeling sick, they share how commitment shaped their results and why most people fall short. If you’ve ever wondered why others seem to get ahead faster, this conversation might hold the answer.

Link mentioned:
Big goals don’t happen by accident. Next Level Dreamliner helps you plan, track, and follow through. Grab your copy 👉  https://a.co/d/9fPpxEt

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Free 30-minute Business Breakthrough Session with Alan -
https://calendly.com/alanlazaros/30-minute-free-breakthrough-session?month=2025-04
Free 30-Minute Podcast Breakthrough Session with Kevin -
https://calendly.com/kevinpalmieri/free-30-minute-podcast-breakthrough-session-with-kevin

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NLU is not just a podcast; it’s a gateway to a wealth of resources designed to help you achieve your goals and dreams. From our Next Level Dreamliner to our Group Coaching, we offer a variety of tools and communities to support your personal development journey.

For more information, please check out our website at the link below. 👇

Website 💻  http://www.nextleveluniverse.com

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We love connecting with you guys! Reach out on Instagram, Facebook, or via email. We’re here to support you in your personal and professional development journey.

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Kevin: https://www.instagram.com/neverquitkid/
Alan: https://www.instagram.com/alazaros88/

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Alan@nextleveluniverse.com

LinkedIn ✍
Kevin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kevin-palmieri-5b7736160/
Alan: https://www.linkedin.com/in/alanlazarosllc/

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Show notes:
(2:18) The $300 hotel room story
(4:07) What true commitment actually costs
(5:48) Your goals don’t care how you feel
(9:48) Why do some people get better results
(12:39) Next Level Dreamliner: The planner, agenda, journal, and habit tracker to rule them all. Get a copy: https://a.co/d/9fPpxEt
(14:47) The real reason you didn’t win
(16:48) Balancing commitment in life
(18:11) Believe first, then commit
(20:03) When commitment turns destructive
(22:18) Outro

Send a text to Kevin and Alan!

Kevin Palmieri:

One of the hardest things to say to somebody is look, you're just not committed enough. I know you don't want to hear it. I know maybe you feel like you are, but based on the goals that you have set and based on the actions that you are practicing, it is abundantly clear that you are not committed enough, and I would rather you know that now than continue to waste your time. So let's level up that commitment.

Alan Lazaros:

I was squatting in the gym the other day and I tweaked my knee and Emilia, my gym partner, my intimate partner, my love of my life, said are you okay? I said no, I tweaked my knee and she said I'm so sorry to hear that. I said it's on me. I am not that committed to my mobility.

Kevin Palmieri:

Welcome to Next Level University. I'm your host, kevin Palmieri, and I'm your co-host, alan Lazarus. At NLU, we believe in a heart-driven but no BS approach to holistic self-improvement for dream chasers.

Alan Lazaros:

Our goal with every episode is to help you level up your life love health and wealth.

Kevin Palmieri:

We bring you a new episode every single day, on topics like confidence, self-belief, self-worth, self-awareness, relationships, boundaries, consistency, habits and defining your own unique version of success.

Alan Lazaros:

Self-improvement in your pocket, every day, from anywhere, completely free.

Kevin Palmieri:

Welcome to Next Level University, next Level Nation today for episode number 2000 and 79. What if you're not committed enough for your goals? The reason I wanted to do this episode is because I did an episode on Podcast Growth University about this and I just feel like we haven't touched on this in a long time and if we do, like a throwback, one of our highest listened to episodes of all time was about commitment. Believe it or not, it was about commitment. So I was thinking recently because I was looking back I've been looking back a lot on the past and our journey and all that stuff. I was thinking why did we get so far ahead so quickly compared to the other podcasters that we knew? And it now it's abundantly clear we were just way more committed than most of the people around us.

Kevin Palmieri:

I used the story we did an interview in boston. One of our mentors was coming to boston and we booked like a $300 hotel room before they even told us whether or not they'd be able to do it and we didn't have $300 to book this hotel room. So we, alan and I, were like, should we just book it in case? And like, yeah, all right, cool, throw in our credit card so we book a really nice hotel room in Boston. Our mentor ends up being able to do it. We just take one of. So it was a two bedroom hotel room, a two bed hotel room. We take one of the beds, stack it on top of the other one. We destroyed this room respectfully. We didn't break anything but we. It was in shambles.

Alan Lazaros:

We did break one of our lights.

Kevin Palmieri:

We did break one of our lights, but it wasn't the hotel, so they they were okay with that and we went above and beyond to make sure that this interview could happen. And now, in retrospect, I don't think a lot of people were doing that. I don't think a lot of people were traveling an hour and a half or traveling six hours to New Jersey, spending 12 hours out of the day in the car, to do an interview with someone, like we did with with Eric Legrand, and we went down there with with Bella Picard. It makes sense now, looking back. Now, here's the truth.

Kevin Palmieri:

Yes, it's you against you to a degree. It's always going to be you against you and it's going to start with you against you, but you're competing with people who might be more committed. If you were podcasting in 2018 and you were trying to win, you were competing with us. You were competing with us. If you're a podcaster now, you're still competing with you, but you're competing with us and we're super, super committed. It's really hard to beat someone that's committed and it's really hard to win yourself if you're just not committed enough. Unfortunately or I guess, maybe not even unfortunately that's just the way it works.

Alan Lazaros:

What I've always found is the most difficult part about commitment is, I think, step one, level one. Level one is I'm going to set this goal. Level two is I'm going to commit to it. Level three is what are the implications of that commitment? So for me, the commitment piece was always there. It's the relationships that always suffered when you're committed at level 10, I'll never forget when Kev shared this on a podcast. He said if you ever want to question how committed Alan is, one time I got into my office and I smelled something. It kind of smelled like shit and I had back-to-backs coaching sessions three hours straight. You and I were recording after that and you and I are in the pre-screen room for lack of better phrasing in StreamYard and I'm like dude, something smells like shit. Man, it smelled like shit all morning and I turn and I look that's a shit right underneath my desk.

Alan Lazaros:

So my little Pomeranian Chihuahua, tucker Bush, tucker Wolf, took a shit in my office. He was probably mad at me because I had been working so much and not giving him bellies. And kevin, you, you said this story of you. If you ever question alan's commitment. He did three full business coaching sessions with a shit directly under his desk and didn't even notice. I didn't notice but I just was like whatever, what are we gonna do? I do think that that story is funny, but I also think it's indicative of commitment.

Alan Lazaros:

I know I'm hardcore with this. I'm going to go hardcore for a second. Fair warning I don't give a fuck if it's raining, I don't care if it's snowing, I don't care if you feel bad, I don't care about any of that. Your goals don't care. Your goals don't care. I didn't want to go to the gym today. I'm 1,180 days in a row of exercise and there's at least a third of those that I didn't want to do. And I joke about mobility and all that stuff. I'm still. I've been doing mobility every day for however long. Emilia holds the line on that more than I do. I would have canned it for sure. But the exercise piece I don't. It doesn't care. The gym doesn't care, your goals don't care. 2074 episodes. 2076, I think, is this one. It's 2079. 2079. But the truth of the matter is speaking only about goals, not about relationships. When it comes to goals, they don't care. They don't care about your feelings. They don't care.

Alan Lazaros:

The other day I was seeing spots and I was not feeling well and I had gone to the bathroom several times that day. I ate pad thai the night before. It wasn't great. I was like, do I have food poisoning? Like am I going to be okay? And I very rarely feel this terrible. I thought I was going to throw up in the middle of a coaching session. I'm not kidding, I genuinely was like I might fucking puke and one of my clients shout out to you, you know who you are. He doesn't know this part, but he will now I.

Alan Lazaros:

So he's doing a certification. It's a really intense test and I have my phone up and I'm tracking the laps, which is how much time for each question. We're putting it in chat GPT to see his average. If he's above, he has three hours to do this test and I'm timing him and I'm writing Okay, check, check, check, wrong Right, boom, boom, boom. So in 21 minutes. He got, I think, 25 questions. He got an 80.3%. Okay, big on that. It's all good.

Alan Lazaros:

It's just hardcore training and I'm sitting there six minutes left because I'm putting the pressure on. I'm trying to put the pressure on because the time gets to them, so I'm trying to. If you make practice harder than the game, you're going to win the fucking game right. So I'm putting the pressure on six minutes and six seconds. I'm sitting there going. I think I'm going to throw up. I don't think I can make it six seconds. Six minutes and six seconds. I actually had that thought. I don't normally have that thought Usually. It's okay, suck it up, you're going to be fine this time. I was like am I going to make it the full six minutes? And Andrew, if you're out there watching brother, you didn't know this, but I was about to throw up on our coaching session.

Alan Lazaros:

The point I'm making is it doesn't matter. It doesn't matter and I'm not trying to be toxic with this, I'm trying to be honest. That is why we're more successful. That is one of the main reasons, and I love going to the gym with Emilia because she never Fs around, she never lets it get to her. Some days are good, some days are bad, doesn't matter. You put in the reps. Some days you hit PRs. She hit three PRs today. Today was a good day. She got a 90 sleep score. She hit three PRs. She's strong as a fucking ox. I'm so proud of her. But some days she's just struggling through and same with me and at the end of the day, if you can't check the box on the bad days, you're not going to hit your goals, and that's mathematically true.

Kevin Palmieri:

Well, we all know someone out there that has results that we don't and is also willing to put up with a process that we're not. Then I I think we just have to be honest about that from a talent's point, not from a toxic place like what if that just is the reason? What if that? Do you know why? I'm in better shape now than I was last year? Because I'm more committed. That's it and that's it. Same capability, same exact capability, but I'm just more committed. Where, evidently, there's a Memorial Day party this Sunday, I think we're going to, and I'm already thinking of like, all right, like what? How am I going to do this? Like what am I? Am I going to bring food? Am I just going to suffer the whole time? Like, will I allow myself to have a drink? I'm already, I'm committed to making sure that it doesn't go off the rails, and that's just.

Kevin Palmieri:

Don't. Don't villainize commitment. Don't villainize commitment, just like. If you know someone out there who has a really magnificent relationship. I always say this when people ask about commitment. One of the things I always say is what's the difference between a relationship and a deeply meaningful, successful, committed one? The people that are in the committed relationship, go above and beyond. They don't want just a regular, they want a really good relationship and they're committed to looking in the mirror and getting feedback and owning it and growing and having difficult conversations. They're just more invested, that's all. Commitment is A deeper investment in an outcome that you desire. That's all, that's all. Commitment is a deeper investment in an outcome that you desire. That's all, that's all.

Kevin Palmieri:

And if you've ever half asked something and gotten to the end of it and said, ah shit, I could have done more, I could have done better than all that was was just a little bit of a lack of commitment and I don't know, it's abundantly clear now to me. Now, do I think we were reckless at times? Yes, I'll speak for myself first. I know I was for sure you were too, but I'll speak for myself. But some goals, maybe that's what it takes. Maybe it takes staying up later than you you know you should to study for a test. Maybe it takes, you know, something that might not be the the best thing for you in the short run. I don't know, that's up to you whether you're out there or not, but it's. It is becoming abundantly clear to me. I can see it when I see people comment on stuff or the words that they use Like look, if you're not willing to spend $15 to buy a zoom subscription to do your podcast interview, you're not going to beat us.

Kevin Palmieri:

It's not. That's. That's not enough commitment, no skin in the game. If you have Apple TV and Hulu and cable and YouTube TV and blob, peacock and Paramount and all those and you won't invest $15 into your dreams, you're just not that committed. Now it's another platform. Who knows it's? They're all. There's a million of them. There's a million of them Now.

Kevin Palmieri:

I said this on podcast growth. You too, if you're down to your last 15 bucks and you're choosing between that and eating, don't buy zoo. I'm not saying that, but that. But it's just. It's just that the the principle of it. If I've had times in the past one thousand percent where I would spend, I would spend fifteen dollars on fast food. I wouldn't spend fifteen dollars on a book. That's a problem for me. That's a problem. So I'm not talking down to anybody, I'm not. I'm not talking shit. I am as guilty of this as anybody else. But I have noticed the more that pivots into the positive direction, conveniently enough, the better results we get. And again, I don't think that's actually by coincidence, hello hello, hello, nlu listener.

Alan Lazaros:

Thank you as always for listening to Next Level University Real quick. I just want to jump in and Thank you, as always, for listening to Next Level University Real quick. I just want to jump in and let you know about the Next Level Dreamliner. This is a journal that I use every single day. Achieve your dreams 90 days at a time. It breaks down your dreams into goals, milestones and daily habits. We hope you enjoy it. The link will be in the show notes. When you have level 10 commitment, you can create level 10 results, but it's the commitment first, always. It's the commitment first.

Alan Lazaros:

I saw a photo of a fitness show I did in 2016. Eight years ago, spring of 2016. Spring of 2017. Spring of 2017. It was the first one I did and there's a person there who won his class Matt, your boy Matt, our boy Matt and he won his class and his overall and I'll never forget because him and I went to the same show. I was doing men's physique, he was doing bodybuilding and he was heavyweight and men's physique is based on height, but I got fifth place and he won first place in his class and then won the overall. And there's a picture of us both and we're both definitely looking good.

Alan Lazaros:

Uh, but him better than me, and I remember when we went tanning together and I'll never forget this, because matt is a huge man, he's six foot one, but a very built, very large man and I hadn't seen him at all during his prep, so I'm used to him being you call it bear mode, mode like a full bear and when I first saw him I was like Matt, is that you? He was so lean and I remember thinking that's commitment. I didn't lose that much weight, Holy shit, but he won the whole fucking show.

Kevin Palmieri:

He was leaner than I was. He didn't miss once. He told me that, yeah, I was with him a lot. He didn't miss ever was. He didn't miss once. He told me that, yeah, I was with him a lot he didn't miss ever, never, he never.

Alan Lazaros:

I remember thinking to myself I cheated on my meals all the time, but that's why I got fifth, yeah and then next year. I didn't cheat at all, at all crushed it, I just stopped. I it was. I won my overall. I won my class and I won my overall. And I was miserable. It was fucking bad. It was not good, but I was committed. I was like I'm not losing this thing again.

Kevin Palmieri:

And this is such a good analogy for it. I know it's such a good analogy.

Alan Lazaros:

You and I both know this person. He's from our school. I think he was the grade above us. Name's Dave. Yeah, he's ripped out of his mind, right now Good for him and I see his workouts and I see his face. You can tell in the face how lean someone is. He's so lean in his face. You can see his bones and I am sitting there going. I am, I'm Mr Fat face right now, honestly, and I'm like I'm not, I'm not ready.

Kevin Palmieri:

I messaged him, nice, I literally messaged him. I was like dude, good for you, man, yeah, super lean for you.

Alan Lazaros:

I know what that takes To see the bones in your face like that. He's really lean, dude. I think he's probably like sub 10. He's doing a show. He's doing a show. Oh, okay, that's why. Yeah, yeah, he's really lean. When you that lean, it's, it's suffering. It's really sub 10. Body fat is just suffering. It's really terrible.

Alan Lazaros:

Right now I'm probably at like 24 or something, and I feel great, I feel strong, living the dream yeah, I'm living the dream, but I also I'm not going to win any fitness competitions and I certainly wouldn't feel good on the beach. So, at the end of the day, commitment is the answer when it comes to goals. Now the question becomes how do you commit at level 10 to your goals without destroying your relationships?

Kevin Palmieri:

That's, I think, the harder part. I do too, I agree, but I don't. It's not just about goals. You're, you gotta be committed to everything that commitment, commitment towards your goals yeah, but part of your goals is to have a great relationship, and part of your goals is maybe to exercise X amount of times per week, and that's it. It's you got to be committed to everything that.

Kevin Palmieri:

That's what makes it super hard, is it would? It's, it wouldn't be that hard to work 12 hours a day every day. If I wasn't married. It wouldn't be that hard. Just sit in the office Like it would suck, it would be boring, right. But I, if I didn't care about my relationship, this would be way easier in that way. Or if I didn't care about business, my relationship would be way easier. Just hang out with my wife all the time and snuggle with the cats and go out to eat and travel Okay, cool, easy.

Kevin Palmieri:

Or if I didn't care about my fitness, that's what makes it so hard is you've got to be committed to all three, and that's what makes it so hard. So, again, I know we get pretty hardcore when we talk about commitment and we're bodybuilders, so we're, we're super committed. What can you do to level yours up? That's it. What can you do to level up your commitment a little bit? Maybe that means I don't know canceling a subscription that you don't use because you're going to put that money into something else Awesome, that's a great place to start. That's a great place to start. It doesn't have to be like Alan and I talked about where it's, like I used to track every grain of rice.

Alan Lazaros:

How do you commit at level 10 without level 10 belief? Because I would say one of the reasons when you opened this episode and you said we were so committed, looking back in comparison to the statistical norm, of course, yeah, makes sense I believed in this more than anything. I believed it. I still do.

Kevin Palmieri:

Your level. You can't be, you probably won't be committed to somebody else's level 10, but you can be committed to your level 10. You can commit to the degree you believe. So if you don't believe at level 10, then it's a sliding scale. Commit to the degree you believe. So if you don't believe at level 10, then it's a sliding scale. Commit to the degree you believe. Because, again, it is kind of reckless. You can throw some paper wings on and commit to jumping off the side of a building. You're not going to fly, so that ain't it. I don't want you to do that. But what could we do to dial up the commitment?

Alan Lazaros:

How did you commit so much without believing?

Kevin Palmieri:

I'm telling you, my answer is always the same I always believed it would be worth it. I never questioned whether or not it would be worth it. That that I. I loved what we did and I knew if we could figure out a way to be successful, I would enjoy it. That that was. It was always that, and I I'm somebody who, like when I'm all in on something, I'm really all in on something, but I think that comes from the fitness thing. Like I didn't think I would win, I didn't think I would do very well at my bodybuilding show and I did better than I thought. That that's the answer. I don't know if I have a good answer for that, unfortunately.

Kevin Palmieri:

Were you committed at level 10? I was committed to a detriment. Yeah, yeah, yeah for sure. I'm telling you, I would literally weigh out my rice and if it was two grams heavy, I would take it out. Like I when I say I didn't miss at all. I didn't miss at all. I didn't miss a single workout, a single meal. I did not miss anything. Single posing session.

Alan Lazaros:

I didn't miss anything.

Kevin Palmieri:

I think it was also highly detrimental to my physical, mental, emotional, spiritual well-being.

Alan Lazaros:

But I did an episode on my YouTube channel way back. This doesn't exist anymore. I hope I still have it, but it's unlisted. I don't use my personal YouTube anymore but I know I got to jump. I did an episode about the dark side of fitness shows.

Kevin Palmieri:

Oh yeah.

Alan Lazaros:

And I explained I was by the lake. Do you remember that one? I do remember that one, yeah, and I did an episode about how I won the show. I won the overall, I have the trophies, I have the memory I became and everything felt easy after that. That's one thing I will give fitness shows. After the fitness show is over, everything feels fucking easy in comparison, because you suffer so much that it's like, oh yeah, I'm going to be fine. Now I can eat. Of course, everything's gonna be fine. So I think there's something to that. But the dark side of the fitness show I shared, all the struggles and all the fears I remember I was afraid of stuff.

Alan Lazaros:

I was, it was just weird. Caustrophobia came back, it was a whole thing. I was, it was just weird. Claustrophobia came back, it was a whole thing. And, at the end of the day, commit at the highest level you can possibly, commit to put it all on the court every day and make sure it stays constructive. Don't don it. You can tell when you start taking blocks out of the Jenga tower that you'll never get back. You can tell and there was relationships in the past that I committed to at level 10 that I eventually it was. This is this is terrible for my self-respect. This is this is not good for me and I think, as long as you stay in a constructive place and you, it's it's building you, even if you have a bad day or two, and don't try to commit at level 10 to everything. Pick health, wealth and love.

Kevin Palmieri:

Those are the three, all right. Next Level Nation if you are committed to your growth in journaling, we have the Next Level Dreamliner. It's on Amazon. Alan has been using it every day. I have been messing up royally, but it's not because I don't have enough time, it's because I haven't been as committed to journaling as I need to be, and that is me just being honest. It's on Amazon. We'll have the link in the show notes. It's awesome.

Alan Lazaros:

It's the best Achieve your dreams 90 days at a time. The next level dreamliner, gratitudes, most important tasks, most important win, most important improvement you can write your next level lesson every day and we have a great question every single day for you what drains your energy, what fills your cup? What recharges you? That's just one example.

Kevin Palmieri:

Three questions right there, three for the price of one. Believe that, imagine that every day. Imagine that every day, 90 days at a time, as always. We love you, we appreciate you, grateful for each and every one of you, and at NLU, we do not have fans, we have family. We will talk to you all tomorrow.

Alan Lazaros:

Keep it Next Level, next Level Nation.

Kevin Palmieri:

Thanks for joining us for another episode of Next Level University. We love connecting with the Next Level family.

Alan Lazaros:

We mean it when we say family. If you ever need anything, please reach out to us directly. Everything you need to get a hold of us is in the show notes.

Kevin Palmieri:

Thank you again and we will talk to you tomorrow.

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Alan Lazaros

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Kevin Palmieri

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