Why Is Humble Pie So Important For You? (2186)

The sweetest wins are born from bitter lessons. In this episode, Kevin and Alan reveal why “humble pie” is the key to lasting success. From fitness setbacks to business trials and speaking missteps, they show how challenges rebuild confidence, sharpen skills, and keep you grounded when victories stack up. Learn why comfort stalls growth, how competition fuels resilience, and why failure isn’t the end, it’s a reset. Don’t just chase success, learn how humility can keep you there.

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Show notes:
(2:32) Competition brings real humility
(4:13) Ego, feedback, and balance
(7:26) Lessons from wins and losses
(13:15) Failure builds lasting confidence
(17:23) Outro

🎙️ Hosted by Kevin Palmieri and Alan Lazaros

Next Level University is a top-ranked daily podcast for dream chasers and self-improvement lovers. With over 2,100 episodes, we help you level up in life, love, health, and wealth one day at a time. Subscribe for real, honest, no-fluff growth every single day.

Chapters

• 2:32 Competition brings real humility
• 4:13 Ego, feedback, and balance
• 7:26 Lessons from wins and losses
• 13:15 Failure builds lasting confidence
• 17:23 Outro

Transcript

Kevin Palmieri

(0:00) If you feel like you're winning all the time, and you get used to winning, and you think life is easy, and then you take a bump on the head, which you most likely will, and you're not able to digest that, then that is going to be proof positive why getting humble pie is so important along the way. (0:15) You're going to get it eventually. (0:17) You need it along the way.

Alan Lazaros

(0:18) You either get proactive feedback that you seek as you go, or you get too much feedback all at once, which can be very traumatic.

Kevin Palmieri

(0:29) Welcome to Next Level University. (0:31) I'm your host, Kevin Palmieri, and I'm your co-host, Alan Lazarus. (0:36) At NLU, we believe in a heart-driven, but no BS approach to holistic self-improvement for dream chasers.

Alan Lazaros

(0:43) Our goal with every episode is to help you level up your life, love, health, and wealth.

Kevin Palmieri

(0:49) We bring you a new episode every single day on topics like confidence, self-belief, self-worth, self-awareness, relationships, boundaries, consistency, habits, and defining your own unique version of success.

Alan Lazaros

(1:05) Self-improvement, in your pocket, every day, from anywhere, completely free. (1:12) Welcome to Next Level University.

Kevin Palmieri

(1:17) Next Level Nation today for episode number 2,186. (1:21) Why is humble pie so important for you? (1:26) You wanted to do this episode.

Alan Lazaros

(1:28) What do you got for us? (1:29) You and I were talking behind the scenes about competition, and yes, we live in a very collaborative space most of the time. (1:39) Our company is a success company that helps people grow, and we want to see other people win.(1:47) And back when I was younger, I always was in sort of competitive environments. (1:54) Competitive gaming, snowboarding, basketball, academics. (2:00) And I feel like for a little while there, I lost my warrior.(2:06) I lost the part of me that is so authentic that wants to up the ante and be better, and the tenacity and intensity of reaching the next level. (2:21) And I think that for a while we were so collaborative. (2:23) We were so warm and inclusive and loving.(2:25) And I think that's great, but I feel like I lost some of my competitive fucking nature. (2:32) And humble pie comes when you compete.

Kevin Palmieri

(2:38) It comes when you're playing for something. (2:40) It comes when there's a result. (2:42) There's also a measurement.(2:45) There's a conclusion. (2:47) That's the hard thing about this, is are we better than we used to be at podcasting? (2:50) Yes.(2:50) Are we better than we used to be at speaking? (2:52) Yes, some days. (2:53) And that just goes on forever.(2:58) There's no end. (3:00) This is an infinite game. (3:01) I think competition in the finite realm is really the only way to find it.(3:05) And I think I've been searching for that. (3:08) One of the reasons I went back to jujitsu last year, the year before, is because I said, I don't have any freaking competition anymore. (3:14) There's no tests of the ego where I went golfing on Sunday.(3:21) Sunday morning, I played with a kid. (3:22) Gavin, if you're listening, shout out to you, my friend. (3:24) And I'm better than Gavin is somehow.(3:29) I guess I'm naturally good at things. (3:31) So I'm pretty good at golf. (3:32) And there was a little piece of me that was like, fuck yeah, I'm going to win this for sure.(3:37) Yeah, of course. (3:38) I'm going to play with Matt in the future. (3:39) Matt's better than me.(3:40) I'm probably going to lose that. (3:41) But there is a little piece of me that is excited to get the opportunity to flex my ego a little bit. (3:48) We talk so often about eliminating your ego or getting rid of the negative parts of your ego.(3:53) There are positive parts too. (3:54) And I think, I think conscious, constructive competition is a really good piece. (4:01) I don't, I don't have to win.(4:05) It's not going to wreck my day if I lose. (4:07) It's not going to make me villainize the person if they beat me. (4:10) It's just, I want a little bit more skin in the game.(4:13) I want a little bit more skin in the game. (4:15) And I think that's, now humble pie is so important because it keeps you grounded. (4:21) It keeps you, we, Alan and I did a speech one time at a school and we've talked about it many times.(4:27) And we were walking around through the cafeteria and the kids had just seen us speak. (4:32) And one of them was like, what do you, what do you leg press, man? (4:37) And he was, he was, he's a high school senior.(4:39) He's flexing on us. (4:40) He's trying to be a dingo. (4:41) He's trying to get a rise out of us.(4:43) And I knew that's what he was doing. (4:45) And I said, leg press? (4:49) Leg press?(4:50) You asked me what I leg press? (4:52) Cause I think he said, I leg press 600 pounds. (4:54) Like, I love that for you.(4:56) Cool. (4:57) Anybody, honestly, like most people can leg press 600 pounds. (5:00) That's not that impressive.(5:01) I want to know what you squat, brother. (5:03) Let's talk about that. (5:04) Nice.(5:05) That was a little bit of, I'm going to give this kid a little humble pie. (5:08) Yeah. (5:08) Because he's trying to give me, he's right now, he has an ego.(5:14) Over for sure. (5:15) Yeah. (5:15) I can't let him walk all over me because that's going to hurt me.(5:19) Put some respect. (5:20) We can go to the gym right now, son. (5:23) Put down your, put down your milk and let's go.(5:25) Let's go do some squats. (5:27) I'm ready. (5:28) And let's get it.(5:29) But the reason that's so important is because one day that behavior is going to get that person in trouble in some way, shape, or form. (5:38) Yeah. (5:38) They'll get humbled.(5:39) They'll get humbled. (5:40) They'll get humbled. (5:41) Yeah.(5:41) One of my favorite examples of this, there's a giant bee outside my window. (5:44) It's, and I don't mean this as like constructive, this is very bad, but there was a, you ever heard of the brawl? (5:50) Oh my God.(5:51) You remember Ron Artest was a, was a basketball player. (5:55) Yeah. (5:55) They were playing somewhere and somebody like threw something at him.(5:59) Yeah. (5:59) Which, why would you ever? (6:00) I mean, he's a giant human, one of the best athletes on the planet.(6:03) And he went into the crowd and essentially fought this person. (6:07) Again, illegal, gotten a lot of trouble. (6:09) It was an absolute, there's a little piece of me that's like, that's what you fucking get.

Alan Lazaros

(6:13) Yeah.

Kevin Palmieri

(6:14) A hundred percent. (6:14) What do you, can you imagine throwing a drink at someone? (6:17) How disrespectful?(6:19) Yeah. (6:19) Like, what did you? (6:20) And he went up into the stands and beat his ass.(6:22) He fought him. (6:23) He fought him. (6:24) He didn't know, he didn't even go up in the stands.(6:26) The guy like came down to the court for some reason, which is.

Alan Lazaros

(6:29) Is that why he changed his name to World Peace or whatever? (6:32) It's probably. (6:32) Metta World Peace.(6:33) That's probably a piece of it. (6:34) That's probably a piece of it. (6:35) Cause he probably regretted that.(6:36) Again, not your finest moment, but you're going to throw a drink at me. (6:39) It's, this is the thing. (6:41) This is exactly what we're trying to talk about.(6:43) This is, you have to have both for sure. (6:49) The competitive nature. (6:50) We talked about the recklessness on yesterday's episode.(6:52) You have to be a little competitive. (6:55) Of course you got to be collaborative. (6:57) Of course, of course you got to be warm and loving and collaborative, but you also better be competitive too.(7:04) I, I told Kev, I miss direct competition. (7:10) There is no way to tell whether or not I'm a stronger speaker than you. (7:14) There is no way to tell whether or not my speech to the 300 plus kids two weeks ago, when everyone gave me great feedback.(7:22) Okay. (7:22) Awesome. (7:22) But there's no speak off.(7:24) There's no podcast off. (7:25) Yes. (7:26) We're very successful in podcasting.(7:27) I think finances is a way to measure success in business. (7:31) So I feel like that is the only competitive thing that I have, but I also want to make revenue in an aligned way. (7:39) A lot of these people that compete in business are very shady and it's almost like you're playing someone else's game.(7:48) So, and that's apples to oranges. (7:51) Let me give a tangible example instead of all these fucking metaphors, but in a competition I'll use fitness. (8:02) So I used to do fitness competitions and I got humble pie twice and I stomped everyone one of the times.(8:07) And that was great. (8:09) It was good for me. (8:10) It was good for me.(8:11) I felt more necessity. (8:13) I felt more drive. (8:15) I felt more focus.(8:17) I was more focused. (8:18) I got into flow more. (8:19) There was something that was skin in the game.(8:21) There was something on the fucking line. (8:24) And again, at the end of the day, I know that we've had a lot on the line over the last eight years in business. (8:29) I do.(8:29) I just want to put more on the line. (8:32) I'm excited to put more on the line.

Kevin Palmieri

(8:33) That's a good question. (8:34) We always talk about the drive to five. (8:35) Somebody who might be lower in self-belief, lower in self-worth is low.(8:39) High is somebody who's delusionally high self-belief, delusionally high self-worth. (8:43) What is the benefit of humble pie for both ends? (8:47) It makes sense for you.(8:49) You need humble pie because it'll, if anything, it reinvigorates you and it lights a fire under you.

Alan Lazaros

(8:54) It helps me see more accurately. (8:57) It helps you see more accurately. (8:58) It's very easy to think you're in shape when you're around a lot of out of shape people.(9:02) Genuinely, I'm not trying to be unkind, but I live in a small town. (9:06) It's, I'm in the best shape out of everyone I see by far too. (9:10) And I, please don't fucking villainize me for this.(9:13) The truth is the truth. (9:14) I walk, I live in a neighborhood with a lot of older people. (9:19) It's wonderful here.(9:21) It's peaceful. (9:21) We love it. (9:22) It's a gorgeous condo complex.(9:24) I'm very grateful, but I never turn my head and go, what the fuck are you eating, sir? (9:29) It's never that way. (9:30) I'm in the best shape in every room.(9:32) I'm in, and I don't like it. (9:34) I want, I want to be around people who are as focused as me or more. (9:39) I want to be around people more focused than me, more intense than me, more goal-driven than me, more successful than me, more, more.(9:46) I want to be around people who motivate and inspire and educate me. (9:50) And the truth is it's harder and harder and harder to do that as you succeed more and more and more in life. (9:56) And this is the truth.(9:57) When you reach a certain income level, when you reach a certain level in podcasting, when you reach a certain level in speaking, when you reach a certain level in life, when you reach a certain level in fitness, it's harder and harder and harder to find people that ignite that primal drive in you. (10:12) And that's why, when I came to you and I cried, Kevin got, in my opinion, really out of shape (10:16) it during covid facts and actually yes fair he just let it go you just didn't go to the (10:23) gym for like four months and i cried with kevin behind the scenes and i said brother (10:26) you were the fucking god they still delivered food too they just delivered the food left (10:30) it right outside and i i part of the reason i was crying is because i don't want to be (10:37) alone on this climb i want to i want to partner who's gonna we drive each other and motivate (10:43) each other and inspire each other and i i love that you're back after it and you have (10:48) your warrior ignited again yeah you're in great shape again and you used to motivate (10:53) the hell out of me back in the day and i was losing that and it was like fuck am i going (10:57) to be the only one who cares about fitness in the future like what's going on kev and (11:01) you've called me out for certain things too but i think humble pie is good if you're over (11:05) like that high school kid he needs a little humble pie i think the drive to five if you're (11:09) out there and you're struggling and you feel terrible about yourself you gotta stack the (11:12) small wins i'm with you if you feel like you're winning seek humble pie today i tried (11:19) to do 90s on uh dumbbell rows unilateral bent over rows and i was already gassed and i was (11:27) like let's do it and i got eight and i probably could have got 12 but my form wasn't great (11:33) and i was gonna do 80s i was like let's do the 90s and that's what we talked about yesterday (11:37) the reckless plus conscientiousness i'm not gonna injure myself it's not like i'm jumping (11:41) to 120s and there was a tiny part of me that's like i could tweak my back for sure this is (11:46) a little risky but i loved it and i also work out with emelia and she's 5 foot 3 170 pounds (11:54) and she's strong as fuck but she's not as strong as me and i used to work out with you (11:59) and matt and you guys were always stronger than me i think anything cardiovascular i (12:04) would wipe the walls with you guys to be honest nobody cares that's the problem it doesn't (12:07) matter yeah yeah at the gym but at the gym at least yeah at the gym no one cares but (12:12) i like that and i need that and i've also been watching a lot of the crossfit games (12:16) which is super motivating but yeah it depends where you are on the drive to five if you (12:19) have a lot of self-belief you got to be very careful of being complacent whether you have

Kevin Palmieri

(12:23) a lot of self-belief or you're lower on the drive to five if you're a podcaster who is (12:26) trying to get to the next level our next round of the next level podcast accelerator starts (12:31) october 7th my goodness it's coming up quick 12 calls with a discount code it ends up being (12:37) like 24 per call and again i cannot imagine you get a better bang for your buck anywhere (12:43) else discount code is nlu listener at checkout and it'll take 30 off get around next level

Alan Lazaros

(12:50) podcasters with us you want to be ignited motivated inspired educated that's what this (12:55) program is designed for it's designed to ignite the best in you why is it so important for

Kevin Palmieri

(13:00) somebody on the low it makes sense on the high end if you're super confident you you (13:05) answer that question because you were on the lower end i think it proves to you that (13:10) when your biggest fear which is made up comes true it's not that big of a deal best best (13:15) example of humble pie i ever got i in my second speech i ever gave i had a flash card with (13:21) five things on it i thought i'd be able to do 45 minutes on that i did like 15 minutes (13:24) and i fucking panicked and the kids i invited kids up they wanted to talk we'll have a push (13:29) up contest i was i lost it and that imprinted a new standard for me it's like well that's (13:37) not you're not as good as you think kev you're not as good as you think but also it's not (13:47) as bad as you thought it was going to be that and i'd say we did a lot of reps back in the (13:50) day a lot of reps we did a lot that would be the spoke all over that would be the one (13:54) liner yeah we spoke all over uh massachusetts not not really i mean we spoke everywhere (13:59) but yeah we went yeah we went other but we but all over i mean we were a lot of it was (14:03) massachusetts at fairness yeah a lot of it was new england new england yes spoke in (14:09) milwaukee we spoke in florida we've well i spoke in toronto back then i feel like back (14:13) then it was okay all right the first speech second speech third speech yeah yeah i think (14:18) there's gotta go local third speech was florida that is why humble pie is so important to you (14:22) especially and even if you don't believe in yourself because one it yes you realize you're (14:28) not as good as you thought you were and you realize that that badness does not hurt as (14:32) bad as you thought it would and there's something to that and it allows you to get up and do (14:35) it again next time if you convince yourself failure is the end of the road if you convince (14:40) yourself rejection is the end of the road you won't do the thing and get failure or (14:44) rejection and you'll never actually see how livable it is last things please okay we gotta

Alan Lazaros

(14:53) jump this is kevin and i spoke in pittsburgh and we did three hours the first hour was (15:02) a speech the last two were sort of training in more intimate rooms breakout rooms i thought (15:10) we did a okay job pretty strong but not the best and that's usually what i think after (15:15) episodes and after speeches i went the next day to the networking event and they had awards (15:22) and speakers come up we killed it so kevin and i when we finished we thought uh that (15:29) was a rough start all right let's let's pick it up here compared to the other people every (15:34) other word was a filler word like um the not the uh you know filler words dude when i went (15:41) to the dinner the next day no one paid attention to anyone we captured the room unbelievably (15:45) well here's my point kevin and i left that on saturday thinking we did an okay job when (15:52) i went back on sunday and saw other speakers i was like dude we were world class it all (15:59) that's the competition you don't know how to benchmark yourself you don't even know where (16:03) you fall didn't you say if you bench 225 you're in the top one percent of one percent so point (16:08) you're stronger than 99.9 of people i would never know that if if you didn't look that (16:14) up because i did 225 for two 235 how much was it 225 i did 225 for two i couldn't get (16:21) three i felt like a failure but if i think oh wait 99.9 of people can't do this whoa (16:27) so competition and measurement helps you see yourself accurately and i think that's what

Kevin Palmieri

(16:33) i hope lands and so and here's the other thing yes 99.9 of people can't do that and that (16:39) means you can also keep pushing the bar not you but the the collective you that's not (16:44) something to rest on necessarily it's it's great it feels good let's celebrate it and (16:48) then let's get out there and get back after it because let's do something that 99.99 percent (16:54) of people can't do next level that's the next level okay if you want to get to the next (16:57) level your podcast next level podcast accelerator starting whatever i said october 7th and book (17:03) club every single saturday 12 30 eastern totally free right now they are reading thinking in (17:08) bets by annie duke i am also reading it great book you're gonna learn a lot about yourself (17:13) you're gonna learn a lot about taking logical action and how at the end of the day every (17:18) single thing we do or don't do is a bad fire you dig it all right yeah yes sir as always (17:24) we love you we appreciate you grateful for each and every one of you and if you are (17:27) as committed as you say you are to getting to the next level make sure you tune in tomorrow (17:31) because we will be here every single day to help you get there keep reaching for your (17:35) full potential next level nation thanks for joining us for another episode of next level (17:42) university we love connecting with the next level family we mean it when we say family

Alan Lazaros

(17:48) if you ever need anything please reach out to us directly everything you need to get a (17:52) hold of us is in the show notes thank you again and we will talk to you tomorrow