What Comes First Goals Or Necessity? (2221)

When does a dream cross into delusion, and why does it matter? In this fiery episode, Kevin and Alan go head-to-head on what really drives success. They unpack obsession, pain, and purpose to reveal why ‘wanting more’ will never be enough. If you’ve ever questioned your drive, this one will reignite your ambition and redefine how you chase growth. Stop waiting for clarity, press play, and build it.

Episode Reference:
The Conscious Couples Podcast,
“The Top 10 Reasons You & Your Partner Need Goals Part 1 (187)” - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JLQ5HI_Qxcs

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NLU is not just a podcast; it’s a gateway to a wealth of resources designed to help you achieve your goals and dreams. From our Next Level Dreamliner to our Group Coaching, we offer a variety of tools and communities to support your personal development journey.

For more information, check out our website and socials using the links below. 👇

Website 💻  http://www.nextleveluniverse.com

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Alan: https://www.instagram.com/alazaros88/

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Show notes:
(2:35) Why do dreams create necessity
(6:01) The mindset of the 0.005%
(8:10) From “nice to have” to “I’ll make it happen”
(13:38) The locker combination of growth
(18:08) Awareness, goals, and belief cycle
(31:08) The real definition of humility
(37:23) Why survival isn’t the goal anymore
(45:03) Outgrowing your old dreams
(47:54) The GPS to your next level
(49:01) Outro

🎙️ Hosted by Kevin Palmieri and Alan Lazaros

Next Level University is a top-ranked daily podcast for dream chasers and self-improvement lovers. With over 2,100 episodes, we help you level up in life, love, health, and wealth one day at a time. Subscribe for real, honest, no-fluff growth every single day.

Chapters

• 2:35 Why do dreams create necessity
• 6:01 The mindset of the 0.005%
• 8:10 From “nice to have” to “I’ll make it happen”
• 13:38 The locker combination of growth
• 18:08 Awareness, goals, and belief cycle
• 31:08 The real definition of humility
• 37:23 Why survival isn’t the goal anymore
• 45:03 Outgrowing your old dreams
• 47:54 The GPS to your next level
• 49:01 Outro

Transcript

Kevin Palmieri

(0:00) Simplest thought for this episode is when you get to the point where you can add value in health, wealth, slash love in every room you're in, you are on your way to getting to the next level. (0:12) I'm not saying you have to be number one in every room, but if you can find a way to add value on those specific things, I'm willing to bet you're going to be more next level than most people.

Alan Lazaros

(0:20) You can't really design a future in advance without understanding the fundamentals, at least at a elementary level of each of these categories.

Kevin Palmieri

(0:29) Welcome to Next Level University. (0:33) I'm your host, Kevin Palmieri. (0:34) And I'm your co-host, Alan Lazarus.(0:37) At NLU, we believe in a heart-driven but no BS approach to holistic self-improvement for dream chasers.

Alan Lazaros

(0:44) Our goal with every episode is to help you level up your life, love, health, and wealth.

Kevin Palmieri

(0:50) We bring you a new episode every single day on topics like confidence, self-belief, self-worth, self-awareness, relationships, boundaries, consistency, habits, and defining your own unique version of success.

Alan Lazaros

(1:06) Self-improvement in your pocket, every day, from anywhere, completely free. (1:13) Welcome to Next Level University.

Kevin Palmieri

(1:19) Next Level Nation today for episode number 2,221. (1:22) We're doing a part two to what we talked about yesterday, health, wealth, and love are just the beginning. (1:26) And here is, this is my thought.(1:29) Because I think, okay, I feel like I know fitness and I know, I know that at a fairly high level, quote unquote. (1:37) But would I if I wasn't a personal trainer? (1:39) Would I if I wasn't somebody who is obsessed with fitness?(1:42) I don't know. (1:43) I don't know. (1:44) I like that you use obsessed.(1:45) I am obsessed. (1:46) You used to not use obsessed. (1:48) Well, because I was trying to figure out who the hell I was.

Alan Lazaros

(1:50) You used to be afraid of the word obsessed. (1:53) No. (1:54) You weren't behind the scenes, but you didn't want people to associate.(1:57) You thought there was a negative connotation with obsessed. (1:59) I'm obsessed with fitness, for sure.

Kevin Palmieri

(2:01) Of course. (2:02) Fuck yeah. (2:03) But I wonder.(2:05) Hey, good for you. (2:07) Thank you. (2:08) If somebody out there right now, because a lot of this is a byproduct of the fact that I wanted to be in really good shape.(2:14) I've always wanted to be wealthy, always. (2:17) And I fucking sucked at relationships. (2:19) So I had to learn how to get good at relationships.(2:23) Somebody out there right now. (2:26) How, what creates the necessity to do this other than the fact that eventually, eventually, you know, things will get better than they are today. (2:35) Eventually, maybe.(2:37) But they will get worse for a long period of time. (2:39) Somebody asked me yesterday, shout out to BC. (2:41) I was, I was on a podcast.(2:43) BC babbles. (2:44) What's up man? (2:44) BBC babbles.(2:45) He said, what makes NLU and, and the brand different? (2:49) And I said, well, you're not going to feel better. (2:52) You're just not going to feel better after you listen to us, but you will have the opportunity to get better.(2:56) That is a fucking guarantee. (2:58) So if somebody out there right now, doesn't have the necessity to go learn about finance, how do we provide necessity?

Alan Lazaros

(3:08) This is why I think dreams can save your life. (3:11) Because dreams are the necessity to get out of mud. (3:15) When you feel lost and stuck and hopeless, but you got to hang, you got to cling onto something.

Kevin Palmieri

(3:21) You got to grab home until after necessity for most people.

Alan Lazaros

(3:26) No, no. (3:29) What do you mean? (3:31) You got to have them first.(3:33) Okay. (3:34) All right. (3:35) Thank you so much for tuning in.(3:36) Have a great rest of your day. (3:38) Hold on. (3:38) Hold on.(3:39) I was prepping for an interview later. (3:41) I'm doing it. (3:41) You remember Lauren Johnson?(3:42) Of course. (3:43) I already saw it on your calendar. (3:44) I'm excited.(3:45) It's yeah. (3:45) She's awesome. (3:46) So I crunched some numbers for the interview because got to.(3:52) So she, again, she's been a mental performance coach for 12 years. (3:59) And of all the people at that event, I believe she was the least full of shit. (4:04) She was the most on point.(4:06) She was at one point, basically, they said I couldn't partner up with Kev for the exercises we were doing. (4:12) And I was like, Oh no, I'm going to have to leave. (4:15) I'm not partnering with any of these people.(4:16) And I was like, if I don't get Lauren, I'm dipping. (4:19) I'm out. (4:20) Okay.(4:20) I'm going to run a trail or something. (4:22) So I got Lauren. (4:23) It was great.(4:24) And so I'm interviewing her years later. (4:26) And we've been waiting on this for like a year, but not a year, probably earlier this year, probably six months worked with the Yankees. (4:33) Now I don't really care about that status wise.(4:37) Here's why I care about it. (4:39) 500,000 people. (4:41) This is just the U S statistics.(4:42) So for the global people, I'm just baseball's a big U S sport. (4:45) Okay. (4:46) 500,000 baseball players in high school.(4:49) Kevin was one of said baseball players way back then 60,000 play in college. (4:56) Kevin was not because he sliced his hand open and didn't go to college. (4:59) Got to go to college and play in college.(5:01) Yeah. (5:01) You got to go to college of the 60,000 that play in college. (5:04) Only 6,000 play D one of the 6,000 that play D one only 1.2 thousand play in the MLB of the 1.2 thousand in the MLB about 160 between the minor and major league roster of Yankees, including the minor league players. (5:30) There's 40 in the major team on the roster and only 26 at any one time are active. (5:37) Okay. (5:38) So I went through this on chat GPT and I went deep on it.(5:42) Only one out of every 20,000 players gets to play on a major league baseball team. (5:47) And the Yankees are essentially the best quote unquote, MLB team in the world. (5:53) I don't know if that's true right now.(5:54) Not right now. (5:56) Okay. (5:56) But overall, would you say they're a very well-respected successful franchise?(6:01) I would say yes. (6:02) Okay. (6:03) So that's 0.005%. So what I'm excited to ask her about, and I'm bringing this back to this episode is mindset, self-belief, self-worth. (6:14) What's the difference of the 0.005% only one in 20,000 baseball players ever make it to a major league team to actually playing and starting, not even starting, but active. (6:27) I don't know baseball enough to intelligently talk about this, but the point is, I don't give a shit about baseball. (6:33) I care about that.(6:35) The mindset you have to have to be the best in the world at something. (6:39) So when you said you don't get necessity till after I don't, I think that if you don't have necessity before you basically will stay stuck.

Kevin Palmieri

(6:53) I mean, I get necessity from pain. (6:59) But you already had the dream. (7:02) My dream was to be wealthy.(7:04) There you go. (7:05) Yeah, but if that was the only dream, I wouldn't have done this. (7:09) I would have probably taken my clothes off for a living or something.(7:12) I would have made a lot more money in the short run than that. (7:16) Maybe. (7:17) My hips, these hips do lie.(7:19) Let me tell you, they don't move very well.

Alan Lazaros

(7:21) Thunder down under. (7:23) No, but necessity comes before or after. (7:27) And again, this is not a part two of the other episode.(7:30) The other episode was about the subcategories.

Kevin Palmieri

(7:32) Well, I told you. (7:33) Yeah, but this is what happens. (7:35) It's a fluid conversation.(7:38) I think it depends. (7:38) It depends on the person.

Alan Lazaros

(7:40) My theory is you need to have a dream in advance in order for the pain to be constructive. (7:47) If you don't have a dream, like no dream, no goal. (7:50) Seriously.(7:51) Why would you ever get that good at anything?

Kevin Palmieri

(7:55) But I'm, I'm already assuming that somebody has the goal because we've said this before. (8:00) Everybody wants to be healthier, wealthier, and more in love. (8:03) Yeah.(8:04) I would think everyone would say they do. (8:06) Yes. (8:06) They'd say, yes, I do.(8:07) So what's, how do we get that to be? (8:10) How did, how do you go from a, it would be nice to, I will do what it takes within my power to make it happen.

Alan Lazaros

(8:18) Do you think you can stumble upon a goal like that? (8:22) Being a starter on the Yankees? (8:25) No.(8:25) Okay. (8:26) Agreed. (8:26) Agreed.(8:27) So we're on the same page about that.

Kevin Palmieri

(8:28) For sure. (8:29) But that's also a one that that's also whatever the numbers are, right? (8:33) Two hundred thousand.

Alan Lazaros

(8:35) Yeah.

Kevin Palmieri

(8:35) So like that's a, that's a goal that is a little bit different than, but it's the same principle.

Alan Lazaros

(8:43) It's the same principle, but that's best in the world shit. (8:46) It's the same principle. (8:48) I, let me actually say more than just that over and over again.(8:51) So the principle is you want to be better than you are now. (8:58) You want a goal that requires you to be better than you are now. (9:01) Boom.(9:02) That's the start. (9:03) Okay. (9:04) All right.(9:04) So you had a goal before your suicidal ideation. (9:07) You had a goal to be better. (9:08) You wanted to be better than you were then.(9:10) You, you, your girlfriend left you. (9:13) You want it to be wealthy and successful. (9:17) Yeah.(9:18) You wanted to have a beautiful partner. (9:20) You wanted to drive a dream car. (9:22) You had dreams.(9:23) You just didn't call them that maybe.

Kevin Palmieri

(9:26) But I, the thing is I kind of accomplished all of them. (9:29) I did my, I, my, at one point my girlfriend was a model. (9:32) I had my dream car and I was making six figures and I was in the best shape out of anybody I knew.(9:36) I had, I accomplished all the things quote unquote that I wanted to. (9:40) That's why you got depressed. (9:42) Well, so that's what I'm saying.(9:43) You were done. (9:44) And that, that necessity created new goals. (9:47) So for me at least that's, I think that's the way it worked for me.

Alan Lazaros

(9:50) You went from no goals to suddenly a goal creator.

Kevin Palmieri

(9:54) I know, but I was an idiot. (9:57) We talk about this all the time. (9:58) Like I just thought I was going to be wealthy eventually.(10:00) Just thought like puzzle pieces are going to connect and it's all, it's all going to happen. (10:05) It didn't all happen. (10:06) Unfortunately.

Alan Lazaros

(10:07) Okay. (10:08) Let me ask you this.

Kevin Palmieri

(10:09) Yeah.

Alan Lazaros

(10:09) You wanted to be wealthy. (10:12) Yes. (10:12) Why didn't you study finance?(10:14) Fuck that. (10:16) No, seriously. (10:17) Seriously.(10:18) Think about this.

Kevin Palmieri

(10:19) Very honestly. (10:20) Very honestly.

Alan Lazaros

(10:20) All the people.

Kevin Palmieri

(10:21) You wanted to be wealthy and you never wanted to study finance. (10:23) All the people I looked up to who were wealthy did not study finance. (10:27) That's why.(10:28) At least to my knowledge. (10:30) That's why. (10:31) Who did you look up to?(10:33) I looked up to athletes. (10:35) I looked up to rappers. (10:36) I looked up to fighters.(10:37) I looked up to. (10:38) Right.

Alan Lazaros

(10:38) Yeah. (10:39) They got good at their thing.

Kevin Palmieri

(10:40) They got good at their thing.

Alan Lazaros

(10:41) And now you know they had a financial advisor.

Kevin Palmieri

(10:43) Now I know that. (10:44) Or they didn't and that's why they lost all their money. (10:47) Yeah.

Alan Lazaros

(10:47) Which is what we talked about in the last episode with Mike Tyson. (10:50) He had tigers. (10:51) He had tigers.(10:52) All right. (10:52) So for those of you out there who want to learn from Kevin's poor choices. (10:56) Yes.(10:56) You can't. (11:00) What's a better way to phrase this? (11:02) If you do want to be wealthy.(11:05) You should study wealth. (11:08) I would say that's fair. (11:11) But it's like imagine wanting to be in the MLB and like I don't really want to study the game.(11:17) I'm not really into baseball. (11:18) You can't. (11:19) But I know.(11:20) I know.

Kevin Palmieri

(11:20) But that's such a specific thing. (11:23) It's the same goddamn concept. (11:25) It's not.(11:25) Concepts and principles aren't. (11:28) Yes. (11:29) And if you don't think about it that way it doesn't matter.(11:32) You literally said if you can't. (11:35) I don't remember what you said at the start but it was something along the lines of you. (11:38) If you can't.(11:40) If you're not aware of how to create the thing then everything that goes into the creation of the thing becomes kind of off limits for you.

Alan Lazaros

(11:47) Except for you go exploring how to create the thing. (11:51) When you set a goal you're supposed to go. (11:53) It primes your mind for it.(11:56) The world becomes your library.

Kevin Palmieri

(11:57) But it's a goal you believe in.

Alan Lazaros

(12:01) It has to be a goal. (12:02) That's why the reason you've tolerated me this long is because you unconsciously knew you needed me for your goals. (12:08) I consciously knew.(12:09) Okay. (12:09) I've been saying that since the beginning.

Kevin Palmieri

(12:11) I consciously knew. (12:12) But that's my point. (12:13) How?(12:15) You're smarter than I am. (12:16) Yeah. (12:17) And you know more things than I do.

Alan Lazaros

(12:20) That benefit you could have learned from anybody. (12:21) Why me? (12:23) You unconsciously or consciously knew that this was the path.(12:27) That's what I'm saying. (12:28) When you set a goal the person's places things and ideas become on your radar. (12:33) And then you were humble enough to actually tolerate.(12:36) I agree. (12:37) The cons that that are necessary for the pros. (12:39) And that's a whole nother conversation we should.

Kevin Palmieri

(12:41) But I but I think the issue I have with your perspective is that oh his wi-fi is fucking brutal. (12:49) Is it really? (12:49) It's insufferable his wi-fi right now.(12:52) If you're still watching this Alan is completely frozen on my end. (12:56) I can't see him. (12:57) In post-production it will probably get fixed.(12:59) You might not even hear any of this in post-production. (13:02) I'm just holding space at this point because I don't know where he's gone. (13:07) I'm still here.(13:08) Can you hear me? (13:09) He's just frozen. (13:11) Oh he's back.(13:11) There he is. (13:12) I held space the whole time.

Alan Lazaros

(13:14) I was talking to the people. (13:15) Oh okay cool.

Kevin Palmieri

(13:16) You couldn't hear me. (13:16) The problem is. (13:18) With my perspective.(13:20) With your perspective of course. (13:21) Mine's flawless obviously as always. (13:26) You have to start almost by saying okay I right now am not in as good a shape as I want to be.(13:34) I am going to lose five pounds in the next 15 weeks. (13:36) Then you learn something. (13:38) You have.(13:38) You learn enough to make that happen. (13:40) That builds a level of belief where then you say you know what okay I'm going to fit in the clothes that I wore at this point in my life. (13:48) Fuck yeah.(13:48) Okay how do I do that? (13:49) And it just continues. (13:51) It continues.(13:51) It continues. (13:52) It continues. (13:53) You got to start with one small goal.(13:55) The goal can't be to to be the person who can walk into any room and add value when it comes to health wealth or love. (14:01) That can't be the goal. (14:02) Yeah no it's too that's too.(14:04) Too broad. (14:04) Yeah it's too vague. (14:06) So I think we have to start with a very small specific under health wealth and love.(14:11) I think that's good. (14:12) I think that's my thesis.

Alan Lazaros

(14:14) You do realize. (14:15) So in theory you losing 10 pounds in 10 weeks which I would consider to be a fairly small goal on the grand scheme of dreams. (14:24) On the grand scheme of dreams that is a short-term goal.(14:27) 10 weeks is short-term goal. (14:32) That is a short-term goal.

Kevin Palmieri

(14:33) Short-term goal yes. (14:35) 10 weeks is not that long. (14:37) But short-term does not equate to small goal necessarily.

Alan Lazaros

(14:44) Okay I mean losing 10 pounds is hard for a lot of people. (14:46) I understand that.

Kevin Palmieri

(14:47) Yeah.

Alan Lazaros

(14:48) And it is doable for anyone within reason. (14:52) I would concur. (14:53) Okay awesome we're on the same page.(14:55) In theory setting a larger goal would force you to become more and learn more and grow more. (15:07) I think the disconnect is if you don't believe in it it won't. (15:13) So basically what you're saying is so if you when you're a kid and you say I want to be an astronaut.(15:19) If you actually believe in it and actually meant it you would have to grow and learn. (15:25) And there's a great film based on a true story. (15:29) I'm not going to think of it right now off the top my head.(15:31) But this dude applied like 14 times 14 years in a row or some shit. (15:36) A true story. (15:37) And he finally got into NASA and he was an astronaut.(15:39) Unbelievable. (15:42) Great movie. (15:43) I'll think of it another time.(15:44) But when you do set a big dream your dream forces you out of the shit. (15:53) Like if you grow up in poverty and you have a big dream to be at NASA and be an astronaut the dream will force you to say think do feel and believe things that you wouldn't do otherwise. (16:12) Assuming you actually believe it.(16:14) That's the disconnect because I would be stuck in bad relationships. (16:21) I would be stuck in toxic friendships. (16:23) I would be stuck in so many ways if it wasn't for my dreams.(16:26) My dreams got me through the hard times because they got me out of a terrible potential terrible life. (16:32) But you're an anomaly with that. (16:34) But it's the same concept.(16:36) I'm not an anomaly with that. (16:37) You are. (16:38) There's other people that their dreams got them out of terrible circumstances.(16:41) Look at the fucking examples you're using.

Kevin Palmieri

(16:45) The best in the fucking world at things. (16:52) You know what I mean? (16:53) But that's the same concept.(16:56) The concept I agree with but the concept in context and specificity and other words that I can throw out just random words.

Alan Lazaros

(17:07) Let's say in theory you believed in yourself. (17:09) Yes. (17:10) When you were a kid you could have been in the MLB if you really wanted to.(17:13) I believed I could but that's a big fucking leap.

Kevin Palmieri

(17:19) I feel like so many things like you know um one of my one of the weirdest nightmares I have is I forget my locker combination in high school. (17:28) I walk up to it and it's like no idea. (17:31) Couldn't couldn't couldn't know.(17:32) I've no like what does that tell you about my high school career? (17:35) I think what we're talking about is. (17:39) So you'll get the locker combo until after you set the dream.(17:43) Listen here. (17:43) Listen here.

Alan Lazaros

(17:44) I'm just saying.

Kevin Palmieri

(17:44) I'm about to tell you about the locker combination. (17:46) Talk to me. (17:47) One the first digit self-belief.(17:50) Okay. (17:51) First digit self-belief. (17:53) Nice.(17:53) Second digit self-awareness. (17:55) Understand. (17:57) Third digit is long-term focus.(18:02) So I believe I can do it. (18:05) You're missing a digit which is setting a goal.

Alan Lazaros

(18:08) None of those come until after you have a goal. (18:10) Okay so the fourth digit. (18:11) No the first digit is set a goal.(18:14) I know but you don't build self-belief for no reason. (18:17) But the goal has to be based on. (18:19) By definition you cannot build self-belief without a goal even if it's unconscious.(18:23) Even if it's to eat cereal tomorrow morning. (18:25) That's a goal. (18:26) I would love that.(18:27) Facts though. (18:28) Real talk. (18:28) That's a goal.

Kevin Palmieri

(18:29) Yes yes yes yes but I think the truth is somewhere between us. (18:37) It's not the way you did it. (18:38) It's most likely not the way I did it.

Alan Lazaros

(18:41) Because I was a little kid and I saw Star Wars episode 2 and I wanted to marry Natalie Portman. (18:46) I did that. (18:47) I'm not.(18:48) I didn't marry Natalie Portman.

Kevin Palmieri

(18:49) I'm going to say.

Alan Lazaros

(18:50) You look very similar and she's even more gorgeous in every regard. (18:53) My point is is I always had a dream. (18:55) I always had a vision.(18:57) But you always had the belief.

Kevin Palmieri

(18:59) But that's because I always had the goal. (19:01) No it's the goal Bill's belief. (19:03) You have something different.(19:07) You I always joke about Alan. (19:09) I literally say behind the scenes like dude that's a fucking movie. (19:12) Like that part is a movie scene.(19:14) The fact that you brought up a mistake in a textbook and the entire fucking class laughed at you and you were right. (19:21) I would have switched schools. (19:23) I would have moonwalked right out of the room and I would have been like fuck this.(19:28) I'm leaving.

Alan Lazaros

(19:29) I did switch schools. (19:30) I went to WPI.

Kevin Palmieri

(19:31) Well yeah later.

Alan Lazaros

(19:33) No but like that it's just. (19:35) But the principle's the same. (19:37) I know and I appreciate it.(19:39) I do. (19:39) Like yes of course. (19:40) I know but but you could say the the principle.(19:44) Yeah but you can take principles to the extreme.

Kevin Palmieri

(19:48) In theory anyone can what? (19:52) I want to hear that. (19:54) All right.(20:00) This is good. (20:00) I like this. (20:01) We usually get a lot of love on episodes like this.(20:03) People are usually like that was fire. (20:05) Did you learn anything? (20:06) I don't know.(20:07) I don't know if you're going to learn anything.

Alan Lazaros

(20:09) But if you were going to get anything that is on you. (20:11) No I'm kidding. (20:12) But seriously this is good stuff because these debates that are healthy discords are exactly where all the answers are.(20:23) This is I do realize that I'm on the extreme end of the bell curve when it comes to believing in myself. (20:32) But I there's nothing that maybe you wouldn't have gotten straight A's without trying like me. (20:40) But you definitely could have done better than you fucking did.(20:42) I agree. (20:43) Okay so. (20:44) I agree.(20:44) By definition anyone can do better. (20:47) The reason they're not doing better is not some innate quality that I have and that Eminem has and that other people. (20:52) It's it's we have some innate quality that maybe gives us an advantage to build self-belief quicker.(21:00) Like one of my clients that I've been working with for a long time she said Alan you don't understand what it's like to not be able to connect all that. (21:07) Like you your mind just connects all of that. (21:11) And we came up with something that happened when she was younger and it was like that is obviously why you're who you are today.(21:17) And she's like I said why didn't you tell me that before? (21:20) She said I genuinely just didn't think of it. (21:22) I didn't think it was relevant.(21:23) It's like that's the reason you're doing what you're doing right now. (21:27) How could you not but that's the me projecting of like how could you not connect that. (21:32) But that's because my brain's good at connecting things.(21:34) But it's it's chicken or egg because it's not like I okay everyone who is in the you know 0.005 percent the one in 20,000 of whatever industry okay. (21:47) They have something that is they're gifted in. (21:50) That I agree with okay.(21:51) But the principle of building self-belief applies to every human being. (21:57) Maybe that innate quality helped us build it faster for sure. (22:02) Like the math thing.(22:03) I am gifted in that. (22:04) I always have been. (22:05) I'm coming up with financial stuff.(22:06) I might end up a CFP at some point. (22:08) Like certified financial planner. (22:11) The point is is like we all have strengths and weaknesses.(22:17) This is this is the nature versus nurture conversation. (22:21) Everyone has a certain nature. (22:23) Everyone has a certain genetic code that they're born with.(22:25) Everyone has certain strengths and weaknesses that they're born with. (22:30) They did a study where Michael Phelps could never have been a long distance runner. (22:33) And a long distance runner could never have been Michael Phelps.(22:35) Like at the very top of the game there are certain qualities that give you a huge advantage. (22:40) It's called a in evolution it's called a competitive advantage. (22:44) Every company needs to have a competitive advantage.(22:47) Ours is ridiculous work ethic okay. (22:50) And systems and strategies. (22:53) When it comes to building self-belief and having goals though.(23:00) The innate ability the strengths that you have play a factor in that. (23:06) But it doesn't change the fact that anyone can build belief by starting small and building it. (23:16) But that I don't think you can build belief without a goal.(23:19) Even if the goal is unconscious. (23:21) It needs to be the state proof self-assigned. (23:23) Okay so we're on the same page about that.(23:26) What I'm trying to articulate is that in theory you could. (23:31) Kevin Palmieri you could. (23:33) Even though you don't believe it's possible yet.(23:34) You could say I'm gonna be an astronaut. (23:36) And then you could spend the rest of your existence working to become an astronaut. (23:40) And then you'd end up smarter.(23:42) And you'd end up wealthier. (23:44) And you'd end up healthier depending. (23:47) You would.(23:48) You would. (23:48) Because that is required of the goal. (23:50) That is my point.(23:51) Like you could be an astronaut. (23:53) I know that sounds nuts. (23:54) But you could.(23:55) I'm not joking. (23:56) I could make you an astronaut. (23:57) I know that sounds crazy.(23:58) Just everyone relax for a second. (24:00) It's not impossible. (24:03) You'd have to cancel everything else you're doing.(24:06) And reorient your entire existence around it. (24:08) And you and I'd have to start a fucking space company. (24:10) But that actually is possible.(24:13) Someone has done it. (24:15) So I think we limit ourselves. (24:19) It's so funny because statistically speaking you're more accurate.(24:23) But I'm more accurate in what's possible. (24:26) I agree. (24:26) Just because nobody does it doesn't mean it can't be done.(24:30) It's like you're looking at evidence from the past. (24:33) If that's the case then the phone would never be invented. (24:35) Like if we look for 300 years ago.(24:37) I wish we could like sit someone down from 100 years ago and be like yo check this out. (24:43) They'd be like what the fuck? (24:45) Are you kidding me?(24:46) And then I'd say hey it was always possible. (24:48) And then they'd think I was delusional. (24:50) When in reality it's like no I'm not delusional.(24:52) You're just ignorant. (24:54) You're ignorant to what's possible. (24:56) It's not your fault.(24:57) Everyone is. (24:57) I am too. (24:58) Science fiction always eventually becomes science fact.(25:01) We're gonna have flying cars of course. (25:04) Right? (25:04) It's all part of the thing.(25:05) It's all happening. (25:06) There's already robots in homes. (25:08) There's a mall with all robots.(25:09) Like just because it isn't usually the case doesn't mean it's not in theory doable. (25:16) Right? (25:16) And that's I think that's the argument you and I are always having is you're talking about practice.(25:21) I'm talking about theory. (25:22) Most of the time.

Kevin Palmieri

(25:24) I'm talking about the ability to set a life-changing, life-altering goal and then actually do what is required to get closer to it. (25:39) Require such a high level of self-belief that is is statistically so improbable.

Alan Lazaros

(25:46) But where do you think self-belief comes from? (25:49) It's not like I just started with the self-belief. (25:51) I think you started with more self-belief than most people.(25:54) How do you know? (25:55) Why? (25:56) I was a little blobby baby.(25:58) I couldn't even hold my own fucking head up. (25:59) Well that's same.

Kevin Palmieri

(26:01) That's what babies are. (26:02) That's what a baby is. (26:02) I was just a little blob.(26:04) Because you were thinking about making a video game company when you were like how old? (26:13) Super young.

Alan Lazaros

(26:14) Yeah 12 maybe something like that. (26:16) What was I doing when I was 12? (26:19) I'm not okay.(26:20) Okay. (26:21) So I accelerated quicker on self-belief. (26:24) Fair.

Kevin Palmieri

(26:25) Yeah.

Alan Lazaros

(26:25) Fair. (26:26) But that doesn't mean that you can't get there at 32 or whatever.

Kevin Palmieri

(26:30) Right?

Alan Lazaros

(26:30) So it's the principle stays. (26:32) Agreed.

Kevin Palmieri

(26:33) But I'm just I feel like it's good news for everybody.

Alan Lazaros

(26:37) I agree. (26:37) I agree. (26:38) I agree 100 percent.(26:39) And what are you trying to say for the listeners? (26:43) Because you're right dude. (26:48) You're more optimal when it comes to what people will do.(26:51) I'm more truthful and accurate with what is possible. (26:54) I'm certain. (26:55) That is like our career together.(26:56) 100 percent.

Kevin Palmieri

(26:57) Yeah. (26:57) What's possible is always based on what somebody's willing to do.

Alan Lazaros

(27:02) That's fucking dumb. (27:05) But it's based on. (27:06) No.(27:07) Because if they believed it was possible they would do more. (27:11) Yes but there's so many. (27:13) See the chicken or egg?(27:14) That's what we're doing. (27:15) We're doing the paradox of it's the confidence conundrum again. (27:19) I know but you gotta take yourself out.(27:21) You take yourself out of the equation. (27:24) You take yourself out of the equation. (27:25) And I also have to take away Tom Brady and Kobe Bryant and all these other.(27:29) No no leave them. (27:30) Leave them. (27:31) But you're not in the equation helping this person.(27:35) Right?

Kevin Palmieri

(27:36) Do they have any mentors? (27:38) Do they have the opportunity to have any coaches? (27:39) Whatever they're capable of getting on their own accord.(27:42) 100 percent. (27:44) The reason I'm so heavy on this is because I wouldn't be where I am and I just say that and nobody else will ever say that. (27:54) They're just like well I would have found a way.(27:56) I fucking wouldn't have. (27:57) I'm telling you with certainty. (27:59) I wouldn't have.(28:00) How many things did you have to drag me to that I didn't want to go to?

Alan Lazaros

(28:03) A lot.

Kevin Palmieri

(28:04) All of them.

Alan Lazaros

(28:05) And you could have found a mentor or a coach but you would not have had someone who poured as much. (28:13) Yeah the fucking odds of that are so low. (28:16) Very low.(28:16) Yeah yeah for sure. (28:17) And you can't really plan for that. (28:19) But what you can do is seek out mentors and coaches.(28:23) Well I think everybody should. (28:24) The principle remains. (28:25) Okay you think everyone should but they won't unless they have a goal.(28:30) And they won't have a goal unless they have belief. (28:32) And if they don't have a goal they won't build belief. (28:35) It's a total conundrum.

Kevin Palmieri

(28:36) I agree.

Alan Lazaros

(28:36) This is one of my favorite conversations ever because this is like the cheat code. (28:41) If we can unlock this.

Kevin Palmieri

(28:43) Okay when Alan and I partnered up I was like yeah I want to be Joe Rogan. (28:48) Yeah yeah. (28:48) I was like okay.(28:49) Alan immediately thought I thought I could be Joe Rogan. (28:52) No no no. (28:53) I said I want to be.(28:54) Not I believe I can be. (28:56) Those are two very very. (28:57) Now again.

Alan Lazaros

(28:57) Yeah I was very naive.

Kevin Palmieri

(28:59) Please do not. (28:59) That is not my goal anymore. (29:01) That's not.(29:01) I don't aspire to be that. (29:03) Yeah. (29:03) But.(29:03) Which by the way you wouldn't have become this amazing man who doesn't want to be Joe Rogan unless you had that goal originally.

Alan Lazaros

(29:09) And I certainly wouldn't have helped you become your own unique flavor of that if you didn't tell me. (29:14) This is why I think it's so unique for me. (29:15) That wasn't the goal.

Kevin Palmieri

(29:18) That wasn't my goal. (29:19) That was a dream. (29:21) It was a fucking delusion.(29:23) I think it was a delusion to a degree.

Alan Lazaros

(29:26) Okay. (29:27) I think that's what we're. (29:28) Now we're getting somewhere.

Kevin Palmieri

(29:29) Yeah I don't want. (29:30) If the goal is delusional.

Alan Lazaros

(29:31) Okay what's the difference between a dream and a delusion? (29:32) This is a good conversation. (29:34) A dream is something.(29:36) Jesus. (29:37) That's possible. (29:39) Well who determines that?

Kevin Palmieri

(29:42) I don't know.

Alan Lazaros

(29:43) Yeah. (29:46) That's the question. (29:47) Everything determines it.(29:48) And by the way and this comes back to the conversation we've had in the past of is delusion good? (29:52) If it gets you off your ass I think maybe. (29:55) It made me start a podcast.

Kevin Palmieri

(29:57) I started a podcast out of pure fucking delusion. (30:00) You know like.

Alan Lazaros

(30:01) I had no right.

Kevin Palmieri

(30:02) No wonder why you advocate for it. (30:03) I had no right to be talking into a microphone and having anybody listen to me. (30:07) I had no right.(30:08) I didn't know what the fuck I was doing and I think I also had a little bit of a philosophical perspective. (30:12) You need to show both sides because you did have more results than most. (30:16) I know but I had no idea.(30:17) I had less self-awareness than most I think. (30:20) I don't know if that's even true man. (30:22) Maybe not.(30:23) Maybe not. (30:23) It's a juggling act. (30:24) It's all a juggling act.(30:25) My one takeaway if you've taken anything or nothing away from this episode. (30:29) If you've taken something, strong work. (30:30) If you've taken nothing you can take this hopefully.(30:33) This is why going back. (30:37) We did an episode on humility recently. (30:39) This is why humility is so important because humility is what allows you to set the right goal.(30:45) The. (30:45) Please one second. (30:46) One second.(30:46) One second. (30:47) One second. (30:48) The humility of saying you know I know I can do that and all the people around me are going to fucking judge me because I always go above and beyond and I always do that thing that nobody else can do.(31:01) That's humility. (31:02) You actually saying this is going to suck and people are going to villainize me and I'm going to get my feelings hurt and everybody's going to judge me. (31:07) That's humility.(31:08) And the other side of humility is saying honestly I've never been to the gym in my fucking life. (31:16) So I want to go to the gym five times over the next month. (31:21) I'm going to start there.(31:22) Love that. (31:22) Fucking love that for you. (31:24) Nobody else will.(31:26) Nobody else will love it for you. (31:28) That's it. (31:29) You have to set a massive world-tensing goal.(31:32) No you don't. (31:33) Nope. (31:34) Oh you're going to go from not exercising to being the most in shape person ever of all time.(31:39) I don't think so. (31:40) I don't think that's a good goal. (31:42) I think you should just go and just start.

Alan Lazaros

(31:45) Unless you actually set that goal. (31:48) But you think it's possible for someone to say like I want like the astronaut thing. (31:54) I'm going to be an astronaut and then go do it.(31:57) Like if I dedicated the next 30 years to that I feel like I could do it. (32:00) I know I could. (32:00) Yeah.(32:01) But I wouldn't do. (32:02) There's a lot of ifs in there. (32:04) I would cancel everything else I'm doing and orient my entire existence around that new goal.(32:09) Let me throw something your way. (32:10) I think that's the piece that I'm missing.

Kevin Palmieri

(32:12) Yeah. (32:13) Principle. (32:14) The principle.(32:15) You know how to accomplish something that is very statistically rare. (32:21) Yeah. (32:23) Across things.

Alan Lazaros

(32:25) So you already have the awareness. (32:26) The only reason I know how is because I set a goal way back in the day. (32:30) Which was.(32:31) But I think that was based on belief. (32:34) And or awareness. (32:36) Okay.(32:37) This might be it. (32:37) This might be it. (32:38) If you have the awareness of how to do something to a certain threshold.(32:48) You can set a goal.

Kevin Palmieri

(32:50) It's a decision.

Alan Lazaros

(32:51) A real goal. (32:51) It's a decision.

Kevin Palmieri

(32:52) It's not a goal.

Alan Lazaros

(32:54) It's a decision.

Kevin Palmieri

(32:54) It's a decision.

Alan Lazaros

(32:55) And that's different. (32:56) And then you have to. (32:58) I think that that's probably what it is.(33:01) That would make a lot of sense. (33:02) Because if I do have a gift in intelligence, which I do believe is true. (33:07) And I can connect dots.(33:08) Other people can't. (33:09) I probably just had the formulas. (33:10) To me.(33:12) I know this is going to sound a little nuts. (33:14) But like. (33:15) I don't think finance is that challenging.(33:17) It's not that hard to build wealth. (33:19) Like it's actually very easy. (33:21) Very simple.(33:22) Very simple formula. (33:23) It's a very simple formula. (33:25) I can give it to you.(33:26) I did an episode on it. (33:27) Almost no one's going to do it. (33:29) But it would work for almost anyone.(33:31) I mean. (33:32) You could literally. (33:33) I wish I could do like a game show.(33:35) Like put. (33:35) I would work at Walmart. (33:37) For the next 30 years.(33:38) And I could be a millionaire. (33:39) I'm certain. (33:40) I'm mathematically certain of it.(33:42) But no one's going to let me do that. (33:44) And or I'm not going to dedicate 30 years to prove a point. (33:47) I'd prefer if you didn't.(33:48) Yeah. (33:49) I'm not going to do that. (33:50) But I could do that.(33:52) Earn more. (33:52) Spend less. (33:53) Invest the difference intelligently.(33:55) Like that is the formula. (33:56) And I know there's a lot of sub formulas. (33:57) And sub skills.(33:58) And meta skills. (33:59) And all that stuff underneath that. (34:00) But my point of this whole thing is.(34:02) Maybe we are all born little ignorant blobs. (34:07) And then maybe some of us have gifts others don't. (34:12) Which obviously is the case.(34:13) For sure. (34:14) And then when we set a goal based on our awareness. (34:17) Because here's the thing.(34:18) I didn't just set a goal to start a video game company. (34:21) I studied the entire industry of video games when I was a kid. (34:24) I had my own website selling items on the internet when I was a kid.(34:29) Like the whole NFT selling digital items. (34:32) I was doing that when I was fucking 13. (34:34) My uncle was like.(34:35) What the fuck is this? (34:36) You know. (34:37) It's like.(34:37) I just sell these items in this game. (34:40) Now they sell items in games all the time. (34:42) Diablo 2.(34:43) I was selling items. (34:43) There was no online marketplace for. (34:45) I mean there was eventually.(34:47) Because other people like me built websites. (34:48) And it's. (34:53) You set goals based on your awareness.(34:55) But here's the thing. (34:56) This is the conundrum. (34:57) You don't get awareness until after you set a goal.(34:59) It's weird. (35:00) But you're not just going to be aware. (35:02) No one's just like.

Kevin Palmieri

(35:03) 100%.

Alan Lazaros

(35:03) I just know stuff. (35:05) So you almost have to have a goal that requires you to become more aware. (35:11) And then when you become more aware.(35:12) You set a higher goal. (35:13) Because now you know how to do. (35:14) One of the things that you're realizing now.(35:17) And we'll go after this. (35:18) Is now you have a lot of awareness. (35:21) So it's very hard for you to just slouch.(35:23) Like you used to be the best in the world at chilling. (35:26) Still really good. (35:27) But you.(35:27) Dude. (35:28) You were the most chill. (35:29) The reason why is.(35:31) There was not a lot of. (35:32) It's like. (35:32) You would use the metaphor of a video game.(35:34) It's like. (35:35) There's worlds out there. (35:36) But they're blurry.(35:36) So you don't know what you're. (35:38) There's no opportunity cost. (35:39) When you don't know much.(35:41) You're already winning this little game. (35:45) There's no opportunity cost to chilling. (35:48) Well it's a decision.(35:49) And now it's harder for you to just sit around. (35:51) Imagine if you took an entire weekend and just did nothing. (35:54) That your higher self would eat at you.(35:57) Because you're leaving so much on the table. (36:00) But that's because your awareness is high enough to know what you're leaving on the table. (36:03) When you're a little kid.(36:03) You don't really know what you're leaving on the table. (36:06) I do this next level wealth builder with people. (36:08) Where we go through people's entire careers.(36:09) And unpack how much they made. (36:11) How much they invested. (36:12) Where they put it.(36:12) What they did with it. (36:13) One client. (36:15) $714,000 she made in a decade.(36:17) And she's like. (36:18) I have none of that money. (36:20) It's like.(36:20) Well what the fuck did you do with it? (36:22) And I'm not trying to be unkind. (36:24) But obviously you should have.(36:27) She's like. (36:27) I don't know. (36:28) I guess I just spent it on bullshit.(36:30) Well. (36:31) Let's stop doing that. (36:33) What's the difference between a wealthy person and a non-wealthy person?(36:36) The wealthy person didn't just spend on stuff that depreciates. (36:42) But if you don't know anything about appreciating and depreciating assets. (36:46) If you don't know anything about how to earn capital.(36:49) And how to invest it. (36:50) You basically are just going to. (36:52) She's like.(36:52) I don't really know. (36:52) I guess I never really thought about it. (36:54) Well.(36:55) Then that's your fault. (36:56) No one else is going to say. (36:57) Hey.(36:58) You shouldn't buy that pair of shoes. (37:01) They're going to be like. (37:02) Oh.(37:02) Nice shoes. (37:03) Terrible. (37:04) Terrible idea.(37:05) I have one pair of shoes. (37:06) Trust me. (37:07) I should have another pair.(37:08) These smell. (37:09) The point I'm making though is. (37:12) You need to set a goal to get awareness.(37:14) But you don't set a goal until you have awareness. (37:16) So it's this weird conundrum that I think a and I really hope that. (37:23) Why would you learn without a goal?(37:25) You kind of wouldn't. (37:26) Human beings are goal-oriented creatures. (37:28) You're not going to learn how to hunt if you don't need to hunt.(37:30) But if you're alone in the woods. (37:31) And you need to hunt to survive. (37:33) You're going to learn how to hunt.(37:35) You know. (37:36) It's not like our indigenous ancestors were like. (37:37) You know.(37:38) I think I'm going to learn tracks. (37:39) I'm going to learn the wolf tracks. (37:41) And I'm going to learn the hoof prints.(37:43) They did that out of survival. (37:45) They had a goal. (37:46) The goal was survival.(37:48) And so. (37:48) It's almost like everyone out there is only learning what they need to survive. (37:52) But what you need to survive now is so minimal.

Kevin Palmieri

(37:55) Yeah.

Alan Lazaros

(37:56) And I would rather everyone thrive.

Kevin Palmieri

(37:59) It's cool. (37:59) This is a cool conversation. (38:01) It's a cool conversation.(38:02) I think you and I just come from different ends. (38:04) It's for me. (38:05) It's I set a goal that forced me to learn a new level of awareness.(38:09) And that new level of awareness built a new level of confidence. (38:11) And that confidence allowed me to set a bigger goal. (38:13) And then rinse and repeat.(38:14) So it's a long process. (38:16) I think that's the hard thing is. (38:18) I think some people are like.(38:20) I am going to be a professional baseball player. (38:23) When they're young and they do it. (38:25) I said that.(38:26) I just didn't have. (38:27) I didn't have the right combination.

Alan Lazaros

(38:29) When you were saying that. (38:30) Yeah. (38:31) What's the difference in you saying that.(38:34) I really did intend on being.

Kevin Palmieri

(38:36) That's the difference.

Alan Lazaros

(38:37) Okay. (38:37) I did not. (38:39) So why.(38:40) I really don't understand.

Kevin Palmieri

(38:41) Because I thought that's what I was. (38:43) Yeah. (38:43) I thought that's what I played baseball.(38:45) I was pretty good. (38:46) That was the path to the highest level of success that I thought I could achieve. (38:50) That's what I'm going to say.

Alan Lazaros

(38:51) I'll do. (38:52) How do you know. (38:53) Okay.(38:53) Now that you do intend on things. (38:55) What was the difference. (38:56) Because this is what breaks my brain is like.(39:01) I don't. (39:01) I've never said I'm going to do something and then not intended it. (39:04) I've changed my mind.(39:05) Don't get me wrong. (39:06) I've changed my mind.

Kevin Palmieri

(39:07) But I never like setting without the intention at the time to actually do it. (39:11) Because you had the awareness of understanding what it would actually take. (39:13) I wasn't willing to trade everything in.(39:15) I wasn't willing to trade everything. (39:17) At this point I've traded pretty much everything. (39:19) So you didn't know what you'd have to trade in to be in the MLB.(39:21) I didn't know what I would have to do. (39:24) I didn't know.

Alan Lazaros

(39:24) You basically have to dedicate your entire life to it. (39:27) I didn't study. (39:28) That might not happen.

Kevin Palmieri

(39:28) I didn't study other baseball players that. (39:32) And I'm telling you that statistically speaking that is what most people are doing. (39:37) That makes a lot of sense.(39:38) If you're out there and you're not thinking that way. (39:41) I'm not saying. (39:42) I'm just telling you most people.(39:44) I tend to understand the way people think just because I am somebody who. (39:49) Yeah. (39:50) I spent a lot of time existing.(39:54) And that's why like when I'm on podcasts people are. (39:57) I don't know. (39:58) It's weird.(39:59) It's like they think I'm way better than I think I am. (40:02) And who's right? (40:05) Me.

Alan Lazaros

(40:08) I love it. (40:09) I don't know. (40:10) Last piece.

Kevin Palmieri

(40:11) Everybody's right and everybody's wrong at the same time.

Alan Lazaros

(40:13) Well that's exactly it. (40:14) No one's fully accurate. (40:15) Right.(40:16) But we're closer and closer and closer. (40:17) And one thing I will say and I'll give this to you because I'm glad you hung in this. (40:22) We have group 20 and I'm excited to see you all tonight.(40:26) And if you're listening it's happening. (40:28) Everybody. (40:29) One thing that is very clear to me is that this whole goal setting, goal achievement thing.(40:38) I have never operated without it. (40:41) Ever. (40:42) Like that is one thing Emilia and I did an episode.(40:44) The top 10 reasons why you need to have goals in a relationship. (40:47) And her and I on the episode were like we couldn't even. (40:51) It was like what would it even be like not to.(40:54) It was so clear in that episode. (40:56) I'll put the link in the show notes. (40:59) The top 10 reasons you need goals.(41:01) We literally in the middle of the episode I had this humbling moment of I've never not had goals. (41:08) I've never not been working toward a goal. (41:11) This conversation is literally predicated on a goal.(41:16) Everything I do and don't do. (41:18) Everything Kev is predicated on a goal. (41:21) What do you do if you don't have you know it's like that.(41:26) So I'm the anomaly in that. (41:28) I understand that. (41:29) However the amazing benefits that come from having a goal are available to everyone.(41:36) Just because I'm wired in that way doesn't mean you can't wire in that way. (41:40) And you are living breathing proof of that. (41:42) Which I adore because as someone who very clearly was winging it you have now achieved so many goals and dreams that so many people aspire to or want.(41:54) Maybe they don't have the goal but they want. (41:56) And when you get your dream car that's going to be way cooler than when I get mine. (41:59) Because I always was going to get mine in a way.(42:04) Like I was I don't I don't even have a dream car. (42:06) It's not a car is a byproduct of something that I'm going for. (42:10) Whereas with you it's going to be way different and you're going to be able to teach this in a way that I can't.(42:13) I was naturally wired goal orientation. (42:16) Goal orientation is the way I'm wired. (42:19) It's who I am.(42:19) And I think that that's maybe not normal but that doesn't mean it can't become your normal. (42:24) I think that's what I hope people take away. (42:27) That can become your normal.(42:28) It may not be natural but you can totally evolve and grow into that.

Kevin Palmieri

(42:35) Yeah.

Alan Lazaros

(42:37) And it is better.

Kevin Palmieri

(42:38) I think so for sure. (42:40) Even though it's harder. (42:41) I think it just takes time.(42:43) It just probably takes more time than people think. (42:45) Again it's so easy to look. (42:47) I'll use myself as an example.(42:49) It's so easy to look at me now but this is eight years. (42:52) Eight fucking that's a long ass time. (42:54) Go get a go to college and get a master's degree and then go do something else after that.(42:59) And then that. (43:01) However how long does a master's degree take? (43:03) Four years?(43:04) Six years? (43:05) I don't fucking know. (43:05) Depends.(43:06) So yeah I mean usually five or six.

Alan Lazaros

(43:08) So think about eight years is just a long. (43:11) Well you need a bachelor's first so that I'm including that right. (43:14) But technically I mean it depends what frame you look from.(43:17) If you want to start in preschool then it takes fucking 18 years right. (43:20) So it all depends.

Kevin Palmieri

(43:22) But that that's always a thing that I think is so easy. (43:24) You think eight years is a long time?

Alan Lazaros

(43:26) Yeah. (43:27) Fuck yeah. (43:30) Again in the grand scheme of a lifetime like the average life expectancy it's only one tenth of your life.(43:35) That's not that long. (43:36) If and that's the average. (43:38) And so it really is all relative to your level of thinking right.(43:41) So to me eight years is not that long. (43:44) Like when you set a goal to be Joe Rogan how long did you think it would take? (43:47) I didn't set a goal son remember.

Kevin Palmieri

(43:49) Oh okay. (43:49) It wasn't a goal.

Alan Lazaros

(43:50) When you wanted to be Joe Rogan what did you? (43:51) I don't know. (43:52) Fuck two, three, four years.(43:54) However long. (43:55) Hey all right. (43:56) However long it took.(43:57) You didn't mention that. (43:58) I would have said brother. (43:59) It took him 40.(44:00) You're gonna do it in four?

Kevin Palmieri

(44:01) Because it wasn't it wasn't a goal. (44:03) It was I it was the closest representation of what I wanted my reality to look like. (44:10) That.(44:10) There's a difference between saying I plan on attending this and if my life looked this way it would be really awesome. (44:15) Those are two very different things.

Alan Lazaros

(44:18) One of them is useful. (44:19) Yes. (44:20) The other one is just I mean what are we doing right.(44:23) Got me started though. (44:24) I understand. (44:25) Every birthday make a wish.(44:26) It's like what are we doing? (44:27) Yeah yeah. (44:27) You set a goal.(44:28) That's what I'm gonna do with my kids. (44:29) Don't make a wish. (44:30) Set a goal.

Kevin Palmieri

(44:32) I dig it. (44:33) I dig it. (44:33) I dig it.(44:34) All right. (44:35) What is the lesson for you if you're out there? (44:39) One it is a long game.(44:41) This whole thing is a it is a long long long game. (44:45) Very long. (44:48) And like as your belief increases your goals change in weird ways.(44:54) A lot of what I used to want I don't want anymore. (44:57) A lot of the selfish goals I used to have it's not for that anymore. (45:01) So things have changed and evolved.(45:03) And that's the whole other thing is this is what I hope for everybody. (45:06) This is what I hope for everybody. (45:07) I hope that you get to a place where you feel really comfortable and really confident and not comfortable really confident in setting meaningful goals and intentions.(45:17) And then the next layer of that for you that I hope for you is when you get close you realize you don't even want them anymore. (45:22) That I think is fucking awesome. (45:25) I think that's one of the best pieces of growth ever of all time.(45:28) So that's my next level lesson.

Alan Lazaros

(45:30) My wrap up is set a goal that you really believe in now that will force you to learn about yourself others in the world which will get you to see a bigger vision and then you can set a bigger goal. (45:46) And then that'll put you on the path to understanding yourself others in the world more and then you'll set a bigger goal. (45:53) And that's rinse and repeat forever.(45:54) And then eventually to your point some of the things on my first board I crossed right off that list. (46:00) Nope. (46:02) Because you become even more than you thought in some cases.(46:07) And then by the consciousness that you have to understand and create of yourself others in the world in order to achieve that goal sometimes you realize I don't even actually want that. (46:17) The version of you that you have to become to achieve the goal might not even want that goal. (46:22) And some people see that as depressing because when you get the goal you'll realize ah this it's not about that it never was.(46:29) Being on the Yankees is not that's not what it is. (46:32) The life that is a byproduct of being on the Yankees is amazing. (46:37) And the meaning of who you became from nothing.(46:43) Like I wouldn't work with you if you came from privilege. (46:45) I would not. (46:46) That ain't it for me.(46:48) If you came from privilege I would not work with you and we would not get along either. (46:53) Because you'd be like oh how come oh where are my boat shoes? (46:56) Like I can't even with any of that.(46:59) That ain't me son. (47:00) Like if you're not willing to grind for it it's not real. (47:03) Like some people.(47:04) You have to have a boat for boat shoes so you're safe here. (47:08) I'm just so grateful that you came from nothing. (47:10) You have no idea.(47:11) I think about that all the time.

Kevin Palmieri

(47:13) I guess same. (47:15) But I wasn't grateful for most of the time. (47:17) I'll tell you that much.(47:18) Crossed. (47:19) It crossed the chasm but for most of the time. (47:21) All right.(47:21) Next Level Nation. (47:22) I can't imagine no matter how much you grow no matter how much you evolve no matter how much you accomplish the goal that being around super positive super next level people is ever going to change. (47:34) I can't imagine that ever going out of style.(47:36) If that's something you're interested in we have a Facebook group. (47:39) Alan does monthly master classes. (47:41) There's we have a book club.(47:43) It is literally designed for somebody who wants to get to the next level and everybody is giving you permission to do that. (47:49) So yeah that is what our entire company and this whole community excuse me is built on.

Alan Lazaros

(47:54) We have shifted this company a lot and we've evolved over the years and what we stand for hasn't really changed. (48:01) We stand for people who want to be better people character first and people who want to achieve their goals and dreams and assuming your goals and dreams are from a character-driven place they're going to be good for the world. (48:14) So if you need help achieving your goals it's the science of achievement is a science and I've been studying it my entire life even when I didn't know I was and I want to help you and I'm helping a lot of people and we create a literal system of success that increases the probability over time that you achieve the goal.(48:32) Even if by the time you get there you don't want that goal anymore you're still going to be way farther ahead than you would have been. (48:38) So imagine if you had an exact GPS that got you exactly to the destination you want within a magnificent journey along the way albeit shitty at times. (48:48) That is exactly what we do we have a gold GPS called a system of success peak performance tracking and that's what you get with my coaching.(48:56) So once a month is much more affordable than you think. (48:59) Reach out.

Kevin Palmieri

(49:00) As always we love you we appreciate you grateful for each and every one of you and if you are as committed as you say you are to getting to the next level make sure you tune in tomorrow because you know we will be here to help you get there. (49:11) Keep reaching for your full potential.

Alan Lazaros

(49:13) Next elimination.

Kevin Palmieri

(49:14) Thanks for joining us for another episode of Next Level University. (49:18) We love connecting with the Next Level family.

Alan Lazaros

(49:21) We mean it when we say family. (49:23) If you ever need anything please reach out to us directly. (49:26) Everything you need to get a hold of us is in the show notes.(49:30) Thank you again and we will talk to you tomorrow.