Anyone Can Get A Little Bit Better (2236)

What if the only thing standing between where you are and where you could be is leadership? In today’s bold and honest episode, Kevin and Alan break down the real difference between what’s possible and what’s probable, explaining why most people never bridge that gap. They challenge the myth that everyone’s “doing their best” while revealing how effort, principle, and accountability shape real success. This isn’t feel-good talk; it’s a wake-up call to rise higher and lead yourself first. Stop guessing what you’re capable of. Press play and find out.

Episode Reference:
Business Growth University - High Performers vs. Wannabes: The Mindset That Separates the Top 1% with Lauren Johnson (EP18) -  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UBUmR2RkpO8

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Show notes:
(2:52) Principles that apply to everyone
(5:01) Are people really doing their best?
(8:21) Holding each other to higher standards
(10:13) The cost of pressure and growth
(15:13) Seeing wasted potential everywhere
(20:14) The simple truth about success
(22:56) Possibility Vs. Probability
(24:19) Leadership as the missing link
(26:26) Outro

🎙️ Hosted by Kevin Palmieri and Alan Lazaros

Next Level University is a top-ranked daily podcast for dream chasers and self-improvement lovers. With over 2,100 episodes, we help you level up in life, love, health, and wealth one day at a time. Subscribe for real, honest, no-fluff growth every single day.

Chapters

• 2:52 Principles that apply to everyone
• 5:01 Are people really doing their best?
• 8:21 Holding each other to higher standards
• 10:13 The cost of pressure and growth
• 15:13 Seeing wasted potential everywhere
• 20:14 The simple truth about success
• 22:56 Possibility Vs. Probability
• 24:19 Leadership as the missing link
• 26:26 Outro

Transcript

Speaker 1

(0:00) I was reflecting last night about yesterday's episode and my thought process is just because I think I should be doing something does not mean I think everybody else should be doing what I'm doing for me. (0:14) I also have been reflecting and my thinking is always based on principles and while I don't believe the principle applies the exact same to everyone I do believe the principle does apply to everyone. (0:27) Welcome to Next Level University I'm your host Kevin Palmieri and I'm your co-host Alan Lazarus.(0:35) At NLU we believe in a heart-driven but no BS approach to holistic self-improvement for dream chasers. (0:41) Our goal with every episode is to help you level up your life, love, health, and wealth. (0:48) We bring you a new episode every single day on topics like confidence, self-belief, self-worth, self-awareness, relationships, boundaries, consistency, habits, and defining your own unique version of success.(1:04) Self-improvement in your pocket every day from anywhere completely free. (1:10) Welcome to Next Level University. (1:16) Next Level Nation today for episode number 2236 (1:19) we are doing a part two on the three beliefs about life because I feel like (1:25) while that wasn't the most pick a topic and go deep on these are the three lessons these are the (1:32) five lessons whatever I think that type of conversation I mean I love those because that's (1:37) why this got started in the first place and when we have conversations like that I reflect on it (1:43) and I think okay if I could go back and say something in a different way or if I could go (1:48) deeper on something what would I come up with and that's what jumped off the page I (1:55) I think you and I are different in the fact that I don't think the way I live life is the way (2:00) everybody should live life that's my that is my thesis I don't yeah I don't I don't think that (2:08) I don't know why maybe because I know how hard it's been for me to live my life this way and I (2:13) don't expect other people to do it the same reason like we did I remember we had a conversation (2:21) about money and on the episode I said look I don't believe everybody is supposed to be a millionaire (2:27) I don't think because there are some people out there that just aren't ready to handle the (2:32) pressure of whatever it takes to get there so their day-to-day life would be miserable (2:37) do you believe everyone should progress that way that direction I think it would be (2:44) I think it would be beneficial yeah but I think we're getting to the (2:52) because I don't believe everyone should be the exact same but the principle applies to everybody (2:59) everyone would benefit from the attitude of the more I invest into life the more I get out of life (3:04) everyone how do you know you can't say it's a principle it is a principle yeah but that can't (3:11) be the answer okay this is what's the difference between a principle and a law the exact same (3:21) well a lot of principle is something that always applies there's no there's no disconcerting (3:26) evidence okay so gravity is a law 9.8 meters per second squared no matter where you are on planet (3:32) earth that applies and there's no exceptions to that rule and uh this principle of you will get (3:40) more out of life if you invest more into it is it is a law how do you know you had to know that was (3:48) going well newton's third law is every action has an equal and opposite reaction so if I contribute (3:53) more more will come back to me no it's just not in the form of tangible things okay so for example I (4:02) when I dedicated my life to the greatest good I could conceptualize and believe in that is the (4:07) reason I met Amelia so when I was 26 I got in a car accident and I faced mortality and I (4:13) re-evaluated my life and I realized I wasn't reaching my full potential and I decided to (4:19) dedicate my life to the greatest good that I could shoot for yes and from that moment until (4:24) I met Amelia like the the 25 year old version of Alan never could have been with Amelia Smith (4:29) for sure so she came into my life as a byproduct of something way deeper and something way bigger (4:35) and that's one of the things that I think is hard for me is everything that I am everything that you (4:44) are everything we've built is is actually a byproduct of something no one else can see (4:50) it's a byproduct of something deeper inside of us that we try to articulate but (4:54) fucking suck at and something way bigger that no one else can see (5:01) question do you believe I think we had this disagreement at one point I had this disagreement (5:06) do you believe everybody is doing the best they can no same same yeah no fucking chance I don't (5:13) believe everybody's doing the best they can I don't even believe I am well if you did believe (5:21) I believe I'm putting in more effort than others though for sure if you did believe you were doing (5:25) all you could with all you had would you believe other people were too or no no I'm in agreement (5:31) with that no one's maxing out no no but not even not even I don't remember where it was but I saw (5:37) something along the lines of like everybody's doing the best they can I know they're not I (5:41) understand I understand circumstantially what what is trying to be said with that but I don't agree (5:47) with that at all I don't that's why I'm so disappointed in us all the time because we're (5:50) not maxed out we're so much better than this and I also understand why you talking to somebody who (5:57) has lower self-belief that they would never resonate with that so it is it is both sides (6:01) of the equation but it's not depending on where you are you can't just jump from one side to (6:07) the other you know yeah I know you can't jump from you gotta climb the ladder it's next level (6:12) next level next level the temperature's got to warm up because if you if you go from the you (6:18) jump in a in a pile of snow and then you jump in the hot tub it is too hot it seems too hot it's (6:24) not actually it's the same temperature on both ends but it seems too hot so that's my this is (6:29) why you expect more of a five-year-old than a two-year-old you expect more of a nine-year-old (6:34) than a five-year-old you expect more of a 15-year-old than a nine-year-old like at what (6:40) point do you get your shit together like not you but the metaphorical you when I was 26 it was Alan (6:48) Alan you are you're barely scratching the surface of your true potential this is not okay (6:53) remember I was at Cognex I had a colleague I brought him from college he was one of my best (6:57) in college shout out to you John and we were really close in college and by no means were (7:05) we maxed out in college I mean we we had a hell of a social life and it was me Greg and John we (7:13) were like really really close we were sort of a trio and we were super different but also super (7:18) similar and I remember I brought them both to Cognex and and I got a big referral bonus for (7:24) that which was awesome but at one point and we started an inside sales engineering team together (7:30) so me and a colleague named Charlie brought Greg and John on and we were the first four of an inside (7:35) sales engineering team for this global company called Cognex they sell machine vision equipment (7:40) and we were the inside we were like the guys the inside sales engineering team talked to the entire (7:45) global outside sales engineering team and and we were we were the new hot thing in the company or (7:51) whatever and I say that in quotes but it was I mean we were we were a brand new initiative and we (7:57) were killing it fucking killing it right because when you go into corporate I used to think going (8:03) from college to corporate was going to be hard college was way harder than corporate you go into (8:08) corporate after after WPI and it's like oh this you guys don't even try like this is going to be (8:14) fucking easy right this is crazy um but anyways so John came to me one time he's like he's like (8:21) come on man you're better than that because I did something that he didn't agree with (8:27) and I remember thinking like yeah you're right you're absolutely right you're absolutely right (8:32) I am better than that I love that shit step up baby what the fuck are we doing here you're better (8:39) than that you like we have to hold each other accountable to some standard you can't just like (8:49) imagine a teacher's like yeah don't do your homework who cares like that's not the teacher (8:55) that's a great some of my favorite teachers no that's called easy street and easy street gets (9:01) you to nowhere fast but it's I think it's too big of a leap well I think I talk intensely so (9:10) it probably seems like too big of a yes but what I'm really saying is like you know (9:15) you should be treated with more responsibility in college than high school and you should be (9:19) treated with more responsibility in high school than middle school right what is the right level (9:24) of responsibility the level that forces you to grow exactly but not the level that forces you to (9:32) crash and burn necessarily agreed but that would be good for people not every no I firmly disagree (9:39) that's where we got to talk because the human body and brain is super adaptable (9:45) as you can climb out of some dark ass places sure yeah and you can also put yourself in some dark (9:49) ass as somebody who has been lying on the floor having panic attacks thinking he was gonna die (9:53) because I was under so much pressure that was too much if you didn't do that you wouldn't (9:56) have gotten here I also wouldn't have anxiety probably that's not true you'd probably have (10:02) even more anxiety because your life would be a mess I don't know I don't know about that (10:08) I don't know I think that's where you and I disagree because those anxiety attacks it was (10:13) too much in too short a time I agree yeah yeah and that's also called trauma too much too short (10:21) of a time is it's traumatic but even now you you got stronger from that you just but got better (10:28) but there are there are detriments too I think what like what like and again that shit was (10:37) and it was traumatic but it made me better it made me stronger it made me look into PTSD (10:42) I still struggle like dude if you put the blankets over my head I get (10:45) fucking anxious to this day I still deal with shit like that that well we would put you on (10:53) a exposure therapy plan where we would slowly expose but I know I know do you have those (10:58) weighted blankets by the way have you ever used some blanket somewhere the fucking best (11:03) introduced me to weighted blankets (11:04) I love it it's it's like it's hard to get out of bed at six o'clock in the morning without (11:12) waifu while waking your wife up with a 15 pound blanket it's not it's a recipe for disaster (11:19) but okay and and here's the truth it's both (11:23) you're right too much too soon too intense and too little and too little that's it's called (11:31) but I think the principle is you have to find the appropriate amount (11:34) agree for a person where this and here's the difference in a belief we both agree we should (11:38) find the appropriate amount you think people are in the appropriate amount I think no chance like (11:43) no no I don't think they are it's just way less than you think it is okay and how do you know (11:50) how do you know that I'm not saying it because I know this is great because you don't you don't (11:58) know what it's like to be a regular person you don't know you have no fucking clue (12:05) with love obviously you have no fucking clue when's the last time you woke up in the morning (12:13) and you were like I don't think I can do this that actually actually not today is gonna be a (12:20) heavy day fuck that when's the last time you woke up and sat on the end of the bed and said I don't (12:26) think I'm capable of fucking doing this okay okay okay it was a cold summer the reason my (12:44) smile is happening is because first of all fuck you you know I'm kidding I'm joking we're being (12:51) playful um it's a duality I woke up in a hotel room after getting in at 4 a.m. on that road trip (13:04) and I had a call with a multi-millionaire within fucking 20 minutes and I was like not hung over (13:11) because I didn't drink I meant like I felt like I got hit by a goddamn truck metaphorically I (13:16) playfully I was like there's no way there's no way I can I can do it I can't do it well (13:25) so I asked to move the fucking call and we did we moved it and we're and then we crushed it it's all (13:32) good so it's hard because I feel like on one end yeah you're okay on one end yeah I don't I don't (13:39) struggle a ton with anxiety but at one point I was claustrophobic and I couldn't get back in a (13:44) fucking car after my car accident and you know I think there's it's a duality on one end yeah (13:51) I definitely have him different and I think that's fair which I've had to admit in my 30s (14:00) and you kind of take away a lot of the fucking work I've done to become this guy like I was not (14:05) always this guy you know so it's this weird thing where it's like yeah I do feel like I was always (14:12) different that's fair okay than the statistical norm normal average ordinary that shit was never (14:17) for me in any way and I do feel like my effort and the things I'm doing behind the scenes (14:24) are so much more than other people know and that is what allows me to be who I am it's the (14:30) compound effect of 0.1 percent improvements over the last 36 years that I think have allowed me to (14:37) be in a position where I can you know so fair fair but I'm not trying to take any of that (14:43) I'm not trying to take any of that I don't want to take any it's like for me I don't I when I (14:47) see somebody squat it's never like why aren't they better at squatting ever ever I'm just good (14:54) at it but they could be better at squatting sure I don't mind isn't they should be mine is they (14:59) could be for sure and if they knew that they would be and and in this metaphor there's no one that I (15:06) meet that I don't think to myself like you're really not maxed out is there anyone you know (15:13) who's maxed out no no okay that I think that's that's it where they would but benefit from it's (15:21) like um we have amy lenny I showed it to you on the team she studies hormones there's no woman (15:27) she meets where she doesn't have that moment of oh you could optimize your hormones so much better (15:32) that's just it when you know so much and as pretentious as that comes off it's very hard for (15:39) you not to see people's potential I just see so much potential and I see so much wasted potential (15:46) and and that's just it's very hard for me I just went through someone's career yesterday and and (15:53) we broke down from when she was 0 to 10 10 to 20 20 to 30 30 to 40 40 to 50 50 60 60 70 and we went (15:59) through each decade of the themes and exactly what she's gonna do write your book here boom okay this (16:04) family okay this is and she afterwards was like holy shit this is like this is unbelievable and (16:11) there was this small part of me that was like and I I locked it up I told her about it after (16:15) and I know you're listening but there was a small part of me that was like had you not thought of (16:22) this like this is this was always possible for you you know and by the way I've been coaching you for (16:27) seven years we could have done this six years ago she's like Ellen when would I have learned this (16:33) and it's like honestly if you had thought about your career at all this would have kind of unfolded (16:41) better now I do I blame society do I blame her do I blame me for being a shitty coach do I blame you (16:48) for not teaching her because you're a friend of this person like who who is responsible and at the (16:54) end of the day it's like nothing I shared was was breakthrough revolutionary stuff it was like okay (16:58) you write your first for you for you it wasn't that's the difference if everybody knew what you (17:06) knew you'd be out of a fucking job you know same same I have shared revolutionary stuff (17:13) with podcasters that to me is just normal basic shit that they could learn if they actually (17:18) studied I don't know if they know what to study I started a book today and I was like 15 minutes (17:26) in and I was like I don't think I could fucking I don't think this is good I don't think this is a (17:29) good book I don't even remember the name of it I was in my car and I hit it it was like 111 (17:36) fallacies or something oh yeah yeah second I started it it's like this book is read by AI (17:40) I was like you lazy fuck oh dude turn it can't have it yeah can't have it can't have it last (17:45) what time do you have to be off right now two minutes 12 seconds two minutes I do appreciate (17:50) these discords I think same and I dude I and I I'm not trying to lessen the value of the coaching I (17:55) just it's it's hard for me to understand I don't Alan I don't think you understand this gonna make (18:00) you so uncomfortable prepare yourself I don't think you understand how fucking great you are (18:04) I just don't think you get it I just don't think I watched is that part of why I'm great though (18:11) because if I walked around every day thinking I was so great like but I'll go on an interview (18:15) and they're like I did one recently and they were they were like oh you're a fucking next level (18:20) and they're like what's what's Alan like and I was like he's a fucking robot like you think (18:24) I'm next level it's not close it's not even close I watched the clip you posted of you and (18:33) Lauren Johnson the interview and I was fucking jealous I had a moment of jealousy I was like (18:38) god it's so it fucking so natural to you like you're so comfortable in that red as hell I felt (18:45) yeah but it was fucking it was so good it was so good thank you I just don't think (18:51) did you see how red I was in my neck not really I was challenging her because I was like I don't (18:57) want to be a dick but like come on Lauren you know even that I was like fuck good for you like (19:01) good for you for having the courage to do it I one you don't want the praise because I don't you're (19:08) so used to not getting it because people don't give it to you that's part one part two yeah you (19:12) don't really give yourself the praise because you don't you know there's more to give well it's I (19:16) think if I woke up every morning think I was thinking I was awesome I I think it's I know (19:22) like the reason I'm smart is because I don't wake up like I'm so smart you know the people think (19:27) they're smart you usually aren't that but they the most people wake up on the other side sitting (19:31) on the end of the bed saying well fuck what am I gonna do today whatever well they act like they (19:35) don't I know and especially around me and I understand why that is too and I appreciate (19:38) it but and I know we got to jump here in a second but I appreciate it I I really do thank (19:42) you and I think I'm working on that which is yeah I mean some of the stuff we do is is has never been (19:52) done some of the stuff we teach in group coaching that last night was good that was good stuff for (19:56) sure but again it's all values contextual right if you don't want to improve your life it's useless (20:00) it's just going to be it's just going to pay me yes yeah yes um and I think that's something I'm (20:05) learning too is people who are out there watching or listening right now like if you want to be (20:09) successful I'm telling you right now I know exactly how to do it I'm not joking like I know (20:14) exactly how to get you to success I just told I messaged someone earlier and I said I said watch (20:21) these two episodes uh to start definitely study those two episodes and send me a synopsis of you (20:27) and blank snowball it's her husband and I said I'll teach you and you and blank how to become (20:32) wealthy and your children I said it's easy once you understand it and execute consistently just (20:37) like your blank I I can't give away who it is but you know who it is if you're listening but (20:44) it's not that difficult when you have a system and I don't want to lessen it because like when I say (20:51) like I know people that are wildly mediocre that are multi-millionaires and I'm not when I say (20:59) mediocre I don't mean they're great at a couple things and they're consistent at investing (21:06) and that's that's it like that's it like I I actually I really wish that we could create a (21:13) school and maybe one day we'll do this but like nobody knows how to become wealthy it's it's (21:20) it's actually a very simple formula that you execute against over time and there's 58 million (21:25) millionaires I mean it's doable it's just it's just doable the difference between people who (21:34) are doing it and people who could do it is a massive gap for sure and and like I talked about (21:41) one of my clients uh her brother has is mentally challenged he is wonderful that's not anything (21:49) negative about him he has lower potential than she does but that doesn't mean he can't get better (21:56) and if he really wanted to he could learn how to build wealth too and and do you know I I there (22:03) was a guy at Panera who was mentally challenged who was great at his job and I talked about that (22:08) on the podcast years ago I I was so pumped I was like that's awesome like this dude is maximizing (22:13) his potential more than my friends and and to me it's it's all about that I just don't all I see (22:20) is what's possible for people and I think that you're right part of that is me seeing something (22:25) they're not seeing yeah and it's my job to get them to see it which is what I've done with you (22:30) which is why I'm trying to get you to do it for other people because you're going to get people (22:33) to see it more than I can because they're going to assume that I'm fucking I know I don't get them (22:38) or or I'm arrogant or insert whatever so to me it's more important for you to get it than for (22:45) me to get it because you can speak to people who who don't naturally maybe see 10 20 30 years out (22:51) I think it's hard because you see what's possible I see what's probable (22:56) now a blanket statement like I do I always know but I'm I've been pretty good at predicting like (23:01) but what's probable changes based on leadership I know what this wasn't as for you but it was (23:07) possible for you but there was a chasm where I believed enough in what you were saying to say (23:12) yeah I'm in that there's like a chasm that we have but that's because of my leadership you're (23:16) taking away the how much that took for me to get you on board but in the beginning you were jacked (23:22) and you had a hot girlfriend and I was like and you just literally no dude I'm telling you and (23:27) you left your corporate job making almost two hundred thousand dollars a year I knew you knew (23:31) something I just didn't know what it was and I looked up to you for sure all of that oh I'm still (23:37) not jacked and have a hot girlfriend yes yes but now I know you so it's it's not as and you and (23:42) I have been through the fucking mud together so it's not it's different now right it's different (23:46) yes yes Amelia's very beautiful and you're jacked yes but you know it's like what are you trying to (23:51) say no no I know you know you know I do know what you mean yeah you gotta have the results that (23:55) people want for them to listen to you and I I really I you know what's ironic is I don't really (24:00) care about the results people want I know you know it's like in an investment account you don't (24:04) get to see that so you know yeah and we'll talk more about that but for the takeaway for this (24:10) episode what's what's possible and what's probable are very different very different and the gap is (24:19) leadership that is the truth the gap is leadership the gap is mentors and teachers and educators and (24:26) leadership like dude Amelia has improved me so much like so much I am I was one tenth of the man (24:36) that I am now from meeting her and that's the truth that like mathematically that's accurate and (24:44) she she could have done a better job leading me I think but she's getting better and better and (24:48) better leadership so to me it's leading leaders and if you're a listener you listen you can be a (24:54) better parent you can be a better wife you can be a better husband you can be a better person (24:57) and you need to be in order for the world to be a better place like I can't I'll never not fight (25:03) for that like that to me that's like I'm just asking people to to give a little more effort (25:11) and give a little more attention and a little more conscientiousness and and even with Lauren (25:15) I was challenging her on the episode like Lauren no like she has like 10 clients she could have 30 (25:21) easily now I get it I get it she's got two kids she wants to you know do her thing but she's not (25:27) maxed out and and I called her out for that behind the scenes like Lauren you're kind of coast mode (25:33) like what are we doing here you know you can you can jack this up a bit right and you can tell she (25:38) wants to if you listen to the interview we'll put it in the show notes production team please put (25:42) the interview in the show notes it you can tell Lauren isn't maxed out she's got a ton of potential (25:47) just sitting there waiting to be ignited by a leader who challenges her and and who cares enough (25:52) to actually challenge her even though he's read the whole damn time god I would we could do this (25:57) episode all day also that was fudge's butt for anybody who saw that that was a little fudge (26:01) that was a little fudge it's it's uh it's time to eat so he he's yeah I'll be right with you sir (26:05) all right anything quickly before we wrap up I know you're gonna be late for your next appreciate (26:09) it thank you for the kind words always always all right uh book club every single Saturday 12 30 (26:13) eastern time the next monthly master class is next Thursday so if you're listening to this it's (26:20) Thursday next Thursday the first Thursday of the month is the master class is that correct yeah (26:24) boom we'll have the link in the show notes for that as always we love you we appreciate you (26:28) grateful for each and every one of you and if you are as committed as you say you are to getting to (26:31) the next level make sure you tune in tomorrow because we will be here every single day to (26:34) help you get there keep reaching for your full potential or else next elimination I'm joking (26:40) thanks for joining us for another episode of next level university we love connecting with (26:45) the next level family we mean it when we say family if you ever need anything please reach (26:51) out to us directly everything you need to get a hold of us is in the show notes thank you again (26:56) and we will talk to you tomorrow