Next Level University

Should You Really Bite Off More Than You Can Chew…? (2305)

• Kevin Palmieri and Alan Lazaros

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Hosts Kevin Palmieri and Alan Lazaros challenge one of the most repeated ideas in personal development and expose why it quietly derails long-term success. One philosophy prioritizes pressure, risk, and rapid growth. The other protects consistency, identity, and sustainability. Both have merit. Both carry costs. Drawing from years of coaching patterns and thousands of conversations, this episode forces an honest look at how people actually grow, burn out, or compound results over time.

This conversation is not about motivation or hype. It is about self-belief, risk tolerance, performance psychology, and knowing how much weight you can carry without breaking trust with yourself. Listen carefully. Then decide what kind of pressure you are willing to earn, and what kind of future you are willing to protect.

Learn more about:
Your first 30-minute “Business Breakthrough Session” call with Alan is FREE. This call is designed to help you identify bottlenecks and build a clear plan for your next level. - https://calendly.com/alanlazaros/30-minute-breakthrough-session

Join our private Facebook community, “Next Level Nation,” to grow alongside people who are committed to improvement. - https://www.facebook.com/groups/459320958216700

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NLU is not just a podcast; it’s a gateway to a wealth of resources designed to help you achieve your goals and dreams. From our Next Level Dreamliner to our Group Coaching, we offer a variety of tools and communities to support your personal development journey.

For more information, check out our website and socials using the links below. 👇

Website: http://www.nextleveluniverse.com

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Kevin: https://www.instagram.com/neverquitkid/
Alan: https://www.instagram.com/alazaros88/

Facebook:
Alan: https://www.facebook.com/alan.lazaros
Kevin: https://www.facebook.com/kevin.palmieri.90/

Email:
Kevin@nextleveluniverse.com
Alan@nextleveluniverse.com

LinkedIn:
Kevin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kevin-palmieri-5b7736160/
Alan: https://www.linkedin.com/in/alanlazarosllc/

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Show notes:
(2:03) When pushing past limits builds strength and when it backfires
(6:02) Risk tolerance, self-belief, and long-term performance
(10:58) Survival bias and why success stories distort reality
(16:41) Matching risk to your ability to absorb failure
(22:21) Consistency Vs. Extremes and who actually wins long term
(31:22) Outro

Send a text to Kevin and Alan!

🎙️ Hosted by Kevin Palmieri and Alan Lazaros

Next Level University is a top-ranked daily podcast for dream chasers and self-improvement lovers. With over 2,100 episodes, we help you level up in life, love, health, and wealth one day at a time. Subscribe for real, honest, no-fluff growth every single day.

Kevin Palmieri

(0:01) Today's topic is something that Alan and I are completely opposite on.e on. (0:06) We do not agree with each other, I would say, at all. (0:09) And we're going to get to that, hopefully.ully.(0:10) Hopefully it'll be a civil discussion here.here.

Alan Lazaros

(0:12) The interesting thing, though, is Kev actually does it my way, but doesn't recommend that for everyone.yone.

Kevin Palmieri

(0:20) Welcome to Next Level University. (0:23) I'm your host, Kevin Palmieri.ieri. (0:24) And I'm your co-host, Alan Lazarus.arus.(0:27) At NLU, we believe in a heart-driven, but no-BS approach to holistic self-improvement for dreamchasers.

Alan Lazaros

(0:34) Our goal with every episode is to help you level up your life, love, health, and wealth.

Kevin Palmieri

(0:41) We bring you a new episode every single day on topics like confidence, self-belief, self-worth, self-awareness, relationships, boundaries, consistency, habits, and defining your own unique version of success.

Alan Lazaros

(0:56) Self-improvement, in your pocket, every day, from anywhere, completely free. (1:03) Welcome to Next Level University.

Kevin Palmieri

(1:09) Next Level Nations today for episode number 2,305. (1:13) Bite off more than you can chew is dumb as shit. (1:17) That's not the actual full episode title, but it'll be something along the lines of that.s of that.(1:23) So, Alan and I were having a conversation before this. (1:30) And Alan has always been of the mind of take on more than you can handle, and then just figure out how to do it along the way.

Alan Lazaros

(1:40) Yeah.

Kevin Palmieri

(1:40) And then eventually, you'll be good enough to be able to do it.o it. (1:44) 100 percent. (1:46) 100 percent.

Alan Lazaros

(1:51) That's accurate.rate. (1:52) Yes. (1:53) Would you add anything to that?(1:55) Innovate your way out of the situation. (1:57) You put yourself... (1:58) So, what you do is you believe in yourself, and you believe in growth.(2:03) So, you set a goal that's very challenging, and then you work toward that, and you end up in over your head, and you have the, oh shit moment.ment. (2:14) When that moment comes, you brainstorm new ideas to try to innovate your way out of the situation. (2:19) I always say the dark holes we find ourselves in, the tools, skills, mindset that we need to climb out also build skyscrapers.(2:31) And what I mean by that is we can all think of a time in our life where something bad happened, and we were in over our head, and we were screwed, and we found a way to swim, even though we thought we might drown. (2:44) And I think that's when you really get to know yourself.self.

Kevin Palmieri

(2:49) I would rather cook something, find out it's undercooked, and then put it back in the oven, as opposed to burning it, throwing it away, and starting over again.gain.

Alan Lazaros

(3:00) In that metaphor, you sound more optimal. (3:06) Oh. (3:06) So, you chose a metaphor that...(3:08) Oh, that's it?s it? (3:09) It's not the principle?iple? (3:10) I'm out here just burning pizza.izza.

Kevin Palmieri

(3:12) But... (3:13) Wait, wait, wait. (3:13) How come you get to when I argue something, you say, no, it's the principle.iple.(3:19) But now, I just chose a really good example.

Alan Lazaros

(3:23) Because your metaphor is excellent.

Kevin Palmieri

(3:25) Yeah.

Alan Lazaros

(3:25) However, it makes mine look worse. (3:28) Oh, because I'm the one burning pizzas.zzas. (3:30) Yeah, yeah.(3:30) What do you do with the burnt pizza? (3:32) You still feed people with them, and then you get better and better and better at not burning the pizza.

Kevin Palmieri

(3:38) Well, you're out here scraping off the crust.rust. (3:41) I just opened the oven. (3:42) Not done yet.(3:43) Give it another 10. (3:46) Okay, I'm gonna say this quote.uote. (3:49) Excuse my throat.(3:53) What? (3:55) First of all, who says, okay, I'm gonna say this quote first of all, and you made a rhyme.hyme. (4:02) You said, excuse my throat after.(4:04) Yeah, I didn't plan on the rhyme.hyme. (4:05) I know, I know.

Alan Lazaros

(4:06) But I laughed inside as well when I did. (4:08) Okay, only those who are willing to risk going too far will ever know how far one can go.

Kevin Palmieri

(4:17) What do you think? (4:18) I think it's great, and nobody talks about the trauma that comes with that.that. (4:23) Okay.(4:23) So what I said to you behind the scenes was, because Alan said, well, I mean, you've kind of always like just pushed it too far. far. (4:30) For the most part. (4:30) With most, with a lot of things, yeah.(4:32) With a lot of things. (4:32) And I said, yes, and I never give that advice to other people because I think I'm probably just willing to give up more.more. (4:42) I'm okay with, I told you, I hit my squat goal of 405 this weekend.kend.(4:48) You said 415. (4:49) I'm not done yet. yet. (4:51) Oh, sorry.(4:51) Okay, and I was like, I got another, I got another 10 in me. (4:55) I got another 10. (4:56) I don't suggest you do this.this.(4:58) I think this is dumb as shit. (4:58) I don't think this is a great idea at all. all. (5:00) I said to Taryn, I said, I need you to come over here and sit on the bench and just watch me.(5:04) And she's like, what do you, what do you mean?mean? (5:06) I said, I won't get it if you're not here, but if you're sitting down, there's no fucking chance.s no fucking chance. (5:10) I don't get this up.s up.(5:11) Whatever it, I don't care if I die trying, like at least I'll get it if you're sitting there. sitting there. (5:15) That's probably not optimal to do the heaviest weight you've squatted in like 10 years as you're like ninth set and with it, with a set of one, probably not great.ably not great.

Alan Lazaros

(5:28) Yeah, no, I would say that's reckless.less.

Kevin Palmieri

(5:29) That is reckless. (5:30) That's right.ight. (5:31) Got it, feel great.(5:33) But I'm not saying other people, I'm not saying other people should do that, right?at, right?

Alan Lazaros

(5:37) I think one rep maxes are dangerous. (5:40) I do, I do. (5:41) Same.(5:42) And same, even though you did it. (5:46) And if you took away that recklessness, we wouldn't have gotten here.here. (5:57) I'm not saying to be unintelligent.gent.(6:01) That's not what I'm saying.;m saying. (6:02) What I am saying is you gotta be a little bit, okay, if it's a bell curve and on the far right is a 10 and the far left is a zero and five is optimal, drive to five, five is intelligent and driven, humble and confident, right?ight? (6:23) You get it.(6:24) In this scale, I think you gotta be a little over when it comes to risk, I do. (6:31) They've done studies where optimists who take risks are actually less accurate with short-term outcomes, but they learn so much more because they try. try. (6:42) They have so much self-belief.

Kevin Palmieri

(6:44) I know. (6:44) So that's the thing that gets, but here's, this is the other thing too.thing too. (6:51) I understand how reckless something is now based on how long I've been doing it.g it.(6:56) So like, okay, what is it more reckless for? (7:00) Is it more reckless for somebody who's never squatted to just do their one rep max or me who has been squatting for 20 years, who has the safety pin set at the exact height?ight? (7:11) I know how to bail if I can't get it.t it.(7:13) Like, could I blow something out? (7:15) Yeah, of course. (7:16) But I know, I can feel, I can kind of tell, but I'm sure a lot of people say that.that.

Alan Lazaros

(7:22) Well, here's the thing.hing. (7:23) How many times did you have to risk going too far to see how far one can go? (7:28) In this metaphor, you got to 415.(7:30) I've never.ever. (7:31) That's really big. big. (7:32) I've never failed at a squat.quat.(7:34) Okay. (7:35) So by definition, I've never gone too far. far. (7:37) But you always took the risk.

Kevin Palmieri

(7:39) But I've never gone too far. far.

Alan Lazaros

(7:41) But you've gone right there.here. (7:42) I've gone close, real close.lose. (7:44) And I think that, and again, this is just.(7:47) Have you ever tweaked your knee or anything?

Kevin Palmieri

(7:49) I've had, I've been like sore the next day, but I've never, never had like.never had like.

Alan Lazaros

(7:53) It still clicks.

Kevin Palmieri

(7:54) It still clicks, but it's smoked a little weed.weed. (7:56) It was fine. (7:57) I, it's from a knocked up reference.ence.(8:00) No, I've never had like a, oh my goodness.ness. (8:03) I have to leave the gym because I've hurt myself.self.

Alan Lazaros

(8:05) When I said I tweaked my knee two, probably a week ago. (8:10) I tweaked my knee squatting as well and not 415. (8:15) But when I was doing it, it was all right.(8:20) All right. (8:21) Yeah. (8:21) That's the end. end.(8:22) That's the end of pushing it.g it. (8:24) I passed the line. (8:26) Not so much that I blew my knee out completely, but enough to where it was like, well, how do you know?(8:32) I think that you have to have sensory acuity to that, which is the rest of the workout. (8:39) I shifted to seeing what I could get away with. (8:43) Quote unquote, when you're injured in the gym, it's you are, that's the bottleneck.the bottleneck.(8:48) So I was trying to pick workouts that wouldn't tweak it more.more. (8:54) And in this success metaphor, I think that you have to be, you can't be under.nder. (8:58) You're over slightly.htly.(9:00) You're not an eight on the scale.cale.

Kevin Palmieri

(9:03) I think you can be under.

Alan Lazaros

(9:05) I do. (9:06) That is a fundamental belief I have. (9:08) Name me someone who's extremely successful, who's under.7;s under.

Kevin Palmieri

(9:16) I don't know.know. (9:16) We don't, I don't know their name, but I'm sure there's people out there that are. out there that are.

Alan Lazaros

(9:21) Brother, not when it comes to success. (9:24) I don't know.know. (9:25) There's a little bit of recklessness associated with success, dude.dude.(9:29) There is.

Kevin Palmieri

(9:30) Yeah. (9:30) But I think there's a difference between, well, that maybe the question is, how do you find the optimal amount of more than you can chew?chew? (9:40) Yeah.

Alan Lazaros

(9:41) The quote that you built this episode on offline, off air was bite off more than you can chew. (9:47) And at least you'll choke on greatness or something like that.that. (9:49) Yeah.(9:49) Something dumb.

Kevin Palmieri

(9:50) It's like, oh, well then you're dead.7;re dead. (9:52) So no, that's not, that's not at least it's like try to fly.ike try to fly. (9:58) And even if you fall to your death, at least you felt what it was like to be weightless for a minute.(10:03) That's not a real quote.uote. (10:04) It probably is probably out there somewhere. (10:06) That's dumb as shit because you still die. die.

Alan Lazaros

(10:09) But in this metaphor, Yeah. (10:11) You're not actually dying.ying. (10:13) No, that's fair.fair.(10:14) But you could. (10:15) You could. (10:17) And that's the thing.hing.(10:18) You have to take calculated risks though. (10:20) I believe that deeply. (10:21) You have to.(10:23) You have to send the message even though you think you'll get rejected.cted. (10:26) You have to. (10:27) You have to.(10:28) Dude, if you're under, you're always going to sell yourself short.elf short. (10:33) But you're not going to learn as much.much.

Kevin Palmieri

(10:35) You're not going to.g to. (10:35) Does it ever cross a. (10:36) Okay.(10:37) Let's say. say. (10:38) This is fail forward in a nutshell. (10:38) It is fail forward in a nutshell, but I think we can math this.(10:41) I'm with the math guy here.here. (10:43) Okay. (10:43) If you do something at 100% for six months versus something at 50% for 12 months.(10:51) What if you don't survive?vive? (10:54) You wouldn't survive at 100% for eight months and 10 months and 11 months.nths.

Alan Lazaros

(10:58) Yeah. (10:58) And there's something called the survival bias, which is why the people we see that are very successful, they survived.ived. (11:05) What about the people that did blow their knee out?

Kevin Palmieri

(11:07) I watched a really cool video on this where a plane came back and you probably know this. (11:16) I'm sure you probably learned this in math class at some point.oint. (11:18) A plane came back from war.(11:21) And they're every plane that came back essentially had the same bullet holes in it.n it. (11:26) In certain spots. (11:29) And the teacher said, okay, this plane needs more armor.(11:34) Where does it need the armor? (11:37) And everybody essentially was talking about, I believe how it needed where the holes were. (11:41) And they said, no, the plane flew here.(11:43) Doesn't need armor there.here. (11:44) That's where it got hit. hit. (11:45) It needs armor and all the other places that are actually more important than the places that got hit.(11:49) And it flew back totally fine.

Alan Lazaros

(11:50) That's a really good example of survival bias.bias.

Kevin Palmieri

(11:52) That's a really cool metaphor.phor. (11:53) Where did you hear that? (11:54) I watch YouTube videos about math sometimes.

Alan Lazaros

(11:57) Well, obviously the plane, those weren't kill hits.hits. (12:00) Those weren't kill shots, right?ight? (12:02) Which is the point.

Kevin Palmieri

(12:03) Yeah. (12:03) The point is everywhere it got hit, it was fine and it flew back. (12:08) So it's more of the places that didn't get hit that we probably need to make sure.make sure.(12:12) Or what about the planes that went down? (12:15) Not the ones that came back. (12:16) Where did they get hit?(12:17) We should probably look at that. (12:18) Not the ones pulling back into the garage. (12:20) I think that was actually the point.

Alan Lazaros

(12:24) I see. (12:25) I'm looking at my remarkable right now. now. (12:27) It's Alan, Kevin and the listener.ener.(12:30) And it's about biting off more than you can chew.chew. (12:32) And your position is that you should be under. (12:35) Mine is that you should be over.

Kevin Palmieri

(12:36) I think it, I think long-term it's more beneficial to start off under.nder. (12:43) That's my position.tion. (12:45) Yeah.(12:47) We're at an impasse.asse. (12:49) Okay.

Alan Lazaros

(12:52) You don't, by that rationale, you think someone can get up in the morning, go to the gym, not push it and then grow?grow? (13:05) I didn't say not push it.h it. (13:07) Because if you're trying to go for, okay, I was in the gym today.oday.(13:11) There's a metaphor, obviously.usly. (13:13) I was going for five lap pull downs, 200 pounds. (13:22) If I only get three, I realize, okay, next time I have to go a little lighter.(13:30) And if I get seven, good for me. (13:34) You're going to grow more, but here's, and this is my point. my point. (13:36) Let me use this.(13:38) I did weighted chin-ups. (13:39) The worst thing to do for your self-esteem. (13:44) Yeah.

Kevin Palmieri

(13:44) I was going to say, you can just stop that. (13:45) Stop the sentence right there. (13:47) The worst thing to do.

Alan Lazaros

(13:48) Worst thing to do.

Kevin Palmieri

(13:48) Stop it right there and you'd be good.good.

Alan Lazaros

(13:49) So I did hammer chin-ups with 25 pound belt, which is not that insane, but it's definitely, I'm 215 plus 25.5 plus 25. (13:58) So that's what I'm chaining up.aining up. (13:59) So hammer, hammers.(14:02) And I had Emilia record. (14:04) And I was like, yeah, I'm going to hammer seven of these.hese. (14:06) I got fucking three, three and probably barely four, four ugly.(14:10) And I was like, you know, that didn't make me feel very good.good. (14:16) And I had the moment. (14:17) You're not here to feel fucking good.good.(14:19) You're here to get better.tter. (14:21) Suck it up. (14:22) So I did it again.(14:23) The truth is you can either look good. (14:25) It didn't look good.good. (14:27) The last one, especially, it was not good, but I got stronger.(14:31) I would rather hit my self-esteem, not look good, didn't look impressive.sive.

Kevin Palmieri

(14:39) Yeah.

Alan Lazaros

(14:40) And actually leave the gym with humble pie and having gotten stronger. (14:44) And I do believe this all comes down to the fact that if you have high self-belief, I'm right.ight. (14:49) If you have low self-belief, you're right.ight.(14:50) I do believe that's probably true.true.

Kevin Palmieri

(14:52) Well, my question for you as a coach would be, isn't it your job to get somebody to come back for the next workout?kout? (14:58) Yes. (14:59) Whatever is going to get you back.(15:01) I think that is the answer to a degree. (15:04) You can't just check the box. box. (15:05) No, no, you can't.27;t.(15:06) I mean, no matter what you have to improve. (15:08) So if, if in Alan's case, let's say I'm 100% have done exercises where it's like, okay, I got nine when I thought I was going to get four like that probably. like that probably. (15:18) But then I'll up, I'll up the ante and say, okay, well now let me see what happens.t happens.(15:22) Do you go past?

Alan Lazaros

(15:24) Like how, how close do you go to failure? (15:28) Because that hammer weighted hammer chin-ups that was actual failure, not like metaphorical failure. (15:35) Not.(15:37) I think I might've been able to get two more.more. (15:39) I'm talking like that's the end.s the end. (15:40) There's no chance I can do this anymore.more.(15:42) I could barely get my chin over the bar.

Kevin Palmieri

(15:45) Yeah. (15:45) It depends. (15:46) It depends.(15:47) I mean, when I say like, I, I don't, I haven't been that close to failing a squat in a long, long, long time.long time. (15:55) I mean, it was like, yeah. (15:58) You can't see on, if you're listening, but I was like shaking.e shaking.(16:01) I got all the way down. (16:03) And then as I started to go up, I hit like the sticking point.

Alan Lazaros

(16:05) And I was like, oh, oh boy, this could be, this could be a version of Kevin that doesn't take risks like that.that. (16:11) Couldn't have gotten here.here. (16:12) That's my thesis.esis.(16:14) But that version.

Kevin Palmieri

(16:16) And again, here, so here's the thing.hing. (16:20) I quit my job to do this. (16:21) I've been pretty reckless for sure.sure.(16:23) Like, yeah, fuck it. (16:24) We'll find, we'll figure it out.re it out. (16:25) Throw it on a credit card.(16:25) We'll solve that problem later.ater. (16:27) But I wouldn't have been that reckless if it wasn't for you.t for you. (16:30) Which is the self-belief thing again.(16:32) Yeah.

Alan Lazaros

(16:33) Yeah. (16:33) If you have no self-belief, you, this is what I would say is swing, take risks in proportion to your self-belief.

Kevin Palmieri

(16:41) Yes. (16:42) Take a risk to the degree that you can handle the failure that comes with you not doing it.

Alan Lazaros

(16:47) But dude, like, I think you become the type of person who can handle it after the fact. (16:52) Horrible things have happened to me where I became the person who could handle it after. (16:56) Definitely not before.(16:57) But when it comes to success, I feel like it's different.rent. (17:01) Maybe. (17:01) I think we can adapt the mind, body, heart and soul.

Kevin Palmieri

(17:04) Only if you stay there. (17:05) You can get through. (17:07) How much of adaptation is based on the length of time within given arena?(17:12) Dude, how many fucking people bit off more? (17:15) I have, I know so many people. (17:17) We just, uh, shout out to the new cohort of next level, the next level.(17:23) It's called group coaching.hing.

Alan Lazaros

(17:25) I know.

Kevin Palmieri

(17:25) No, it's the next level podcast accelerator.ator. (17:28) I don't call it group coaching anymore, sir. sir. (17:30) Okay.(17:31) You know, be able to market it right. (17:34) Somebody we reached out to or we were going to reach out to took an indefinite pause from their podcast. (17:41) When I connected with them, they were like, oh yeah, I'm going to take over the world of this thing.hing.(17:45) Everybody needs to hear this. (17:46) They don't even do it anymore.more. (17:48) Yeah, they, they, they did.(17:49) They bit off more than they could chew and they choked on it. (17:51) And now that thing is, I wonder if they came out with a more humble, I'm going to, I'm going to do it. to do it. (17:59) Right.(17:59) I'm going to, I'm going to add value.add value. (18:00) I'm going to get to, I'm going to learn the ropes.the ropes. (18:02) I'm going to try to master my skills here.here.(18:03) There's something, it doesn't matter if you come out hot, if you don't do it for the next year, it doesn't matter.doesn't matter. (18:09) I would agree.

Alan Lazaros

(18:09) People come out too hot. (18:11) I do agree.

Kevin Palmieri

(18:11) Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Alan Lazaros

(18:12) In this healthy debate we're having, it's not like I'm saying to be a 10 or a zero.a 10 or a zero. (18:17) Right. (18:17) We're not arguing between a 10 and a zero.zero.(18:20) Those are two extremes that obviously is not optimal. (18:23) Correct. (18:23) Yeah, yeah.(18:23) But if you have to swing, are we talking six and four? (18:28) I would say so. (18:29) So you're telling me you coach a four, I coach a six and you're telling me long-term the four wins.four wins.

Kevin Palmieri

(18:35) I think the, I think the four sticks around long enough to become a six. (18:41) What if the six sticks around though? (18:46) That's the thing is, are they already a six? six?

Alan Lazaros

(18:49) No, no.

Kevin Palmieri

(18:50) In terms of their self-belief?

Alan Lazaros

(18:52) No, I meant in terms of their risk-taking. (18:56) I think higher risk tolerance is correlated with success, particularly in business. (19:03) So that makes sense.(19:04) But then again, obviously the people who didn't make it don't end up, you know, like people we hear about.ear about. (19:14) The Serena Williams, Michael Jordans, like they obviously made it, right? (19:17) So there is a survival bias in that.(19:20) But the stats still show the 10% that do make it tend to be people who took, had higher risk tolerance, if you study this. (19:28) High risk tolerance, you have a high risk tolerance. (19:30) For sure.(19:32) And that is a fucking superpower if you do it right.

Kevin Palmieri

(19:35) But, and I just think it's good.good. (19:36) I was just going to say, but what has come with it is just also, there are downsides to that. (19:41) I know that a hundred percent.

Alan Lazaros

(19:42) That's all. all. (19:43) I want you to think of someone, not say their name out loud. (19:46) I'm thinking of someone right now. now.(19:49) And I will, how do I articulate this to you without anyone else knowing what I'm talking about?bout? (19:55) This person could never win long-term at the level that you are going to win long-term success wise. (20:01) Okay.(20:02) And the reason why is she has a very low risk tolerance. (20:05) Okay. (20:05) She's a very warm, loving person.rson.(20:07) Do you know what I'm talking about?bout? (20:08) I have guesses. (20:09) All right.(20:10) That person can't win at the level you can win because they're too soft. too soft. (20:14) And I don't mean that in a toxic masculine way. way. (20:16) I mean that in a risk tolerance, resilience way.(20:19) They don't have the resilience to actually be super successful.sful. (20:24) And that's fine.fine. (20:24) She's going to be very happy and fine.fine.(20:26) She's fine.fine. (20:27) But when it comes to next level, like Serena Williams level success, not a fucking chance in hell. (20:35) So I think you're probably more optimal with the average person.rson.(20:41) And I think that when it comes to people who are super achievers, I think you have to have high risk tolerance. (20:47) Emilia's risk tolerance is really high, man. man. (20:50) And that's why, that's actually one of the reasons I believe she'll be successful. be successful.

Kevin Palmieri

(20:54) But the question is, has it always been? (20:57) What'd you say? say? (20:58) The question is, has it always been?(21:00) Yes. (21:02) So that's not...ot...

Alan Lazaros

(21:03) It actually used to be more. (21:05) She's gotten more intelligent with it.h it.

Kevin Palmieri

(21:06) I don't think that's a good example.d example. (21:11) Because you've just gotten the results of that being beneficial for however long.long. (21:15) So it's...;s...

Alan Lazaros

(21:16) Give me an example of someone with low risk tolerance that you think made a big impact.

Kevin Palmieri

(21:22) I don't know if I have a good...od... (21:25) I'm not saying it's not a...s not a... (21:27) They don't have a high risk tolerance.ance.(21:29) I'm saying it's not a massive, massive contrast from a 4 to a 10.4 to a 10. (21:37) That's all I'm saying.;m saying. (21:38) What do you mean by a 4 to a 10?(21:40) They have a level 4 bite-off ability. (21:45) I don't know.know.

Alan Lazaros

(21:46) What is your bite-off ability? (21:48) Risk tolerance, I guess.

Kevin Palmieri

(21:49) My next doctor's survey.rvey. (21:50) Hey, what is your bite-off ability? (21:51) About a 4.5 out of 10, I'd say. say. (21:54) I'm not saying they're a 1 and they got 10 results.0 results. (21:57) I'm saying they're a 4 and they shot for a 6.t for a 6. (22:01) Like if you're going to miss, I would rather miss low and then get to do it again with good vibes and good feelings.ings.(22:10) That. (22:12) No.

Alan Lazaros

(22:14) No.

Kevin Palmieri

(22:15) Very scientific.

Alan Lazaros

(22:17) And here's the thing.hing. (22:18) Let's say there's 100 people in a room and you and I coach them.oach them. (22:21) I'm going to have them bite off more than they can chew.chew.(22:24) Some of them are going to survive and be very successful and some of them are going to quit. (22:28) You'll get more people to 6.to 6. (22:30) I'll get fewer people to 10, but I'll get a few.get a few.

Kevin Palmieri

(22:34) What would the math be on that? (22:37) Like what would buy a cumulative score?

Alan Lazaros

(22:38) You'll probably get 80% of them to achieve some goals at like a level 6 goals.oals. (22:44) Next level you, they'll get to level 6 in the mountain of Everest in this metaphor.phor. (22:47) I'll get everybody to the top of the 20% or 10% or whatever it is.t is.(22:54) Eventually though, after a couple of panic attacks on base camp 3, right? (22:59) And again, at the end of the day, I think that what we're debating here is figure this out for you. you. (23:05) That's actually why we're doing this.oing this.(23:06) Yes. (23:06) Because I think if you're, if you don't have any risk tolerance, you're in serious trouble when it comes to success, because it all comes down to what you're optimizing for.7;re optimizing for. (23:15) If you're optimizing for self-esteem, my way is terrible.ible.(23:19) If you're optimizing for performance, my way might be the way, which is, listen, I'm not going to use that video, but it's like, I probably should.robably should. (23:28) I should post it and say, Hey, fail forward. (23:31) This didn't look pretty, but at least I tried, you know, that would be aligned.gned.

Kevin Palmieri

(23:36) I've been watching a lot of rock climbing content recently.ntly.

Alan Lazaros

(23:39) Okay.

Kevin Palmieri

(23:39) There's a gentleman you ever, you probably haven't because you, why would you, his name is Alex Honnold.x Honnold. (23:44) Mm-hmm. (23:45) He's the first person ever to free solo a mountain called El Capitan, 3,000 feet, no ropes, just him and his shoes and his chalk bag. bag.(23:56) Nice. (23:57) I am fascinated by this human being, just like for a long time, just lived in his van and would just drive to different mountains and climb different mountains. (24:06) Makes sense.(24:07) But he is very much on the end of like, I'll see what happens.pens. (24:12) And he very easily could have died. (24:14) Yeah.

Alan Lazaros

(24:15) And still might. (24:16) But it's also, however, it's worked out for him.t for him. (24:18) Yeah.(24:19) And he, he obviously has done something that's never been done before.fore. (24:21) So you have to have, it depends on the level you shoot. (24:24) I do think that's what we've come to.e come to.

Kevin Palmieri

(24:26) Yeah.

Alan Lazaros

(24:26) If you're shooting for level 10 success, never been done in human history, you're going to have to be like that guy, at least to some extent.me extent. (24:32) If you're looking for, you know, above average income, above average health, wealth, and love, you probably don't, maybe it's reckless to.;s reckless to.

Kevin Palmieri

(24:42) Well, that's always the answer, isn't it?#x27;t it? (24:44) If you're looking for. for. (24:45) Yep.(24:46) If you want to be like top 1% and everything, you're going to have to do stuff that 99% of other people don't.on't. (24:51) And then just run the numbers. (24:53) Yep.(24:54) If you want to be above like most people, you'll have to do more than most people.ople. (24:57) If you're like, ah, I'd like to be like in a room of a hundred, I'd like to be in the top, like 50.e top, like 50. (25:02) Okay.(25:02) Just do better than the other 50 people, 49 people. (25:06) We should do an episode about that at some point.

Alan Lazaros

(25:08) Which is I am so fascinated sincerely by what makes the difference. (25:14) What like when it comes to any endeavor, right? (25:19) How many people love tennis and how many Serena Williams are there?(25:21) It's just interesting.ting.

Kevin Palmieri

(25:23) Yeah.

Alan Lazaros

(25:24) Like so few people, it's almost like anyone can, but almost no one will.will. (25:28) And it's not anyone can obviously that's an over, but like out of every hundred random kids, how many Oprah Winfrey's are there?27;s are there? (25:37) How many Steve jobs are there?(25:38) How many Serena Williams are there? (25:40) The thing is more than I think we think, because if all of them were to be put random sample of a hundred kids, they're all 10.l 10. (25:49) If all of them were actually to be put in a simulator, quote unquote, and simulate what it takes to be successful, how many of them would stick with it long enough?(26:00) How many, like what, what would make the difference? (26:02) It would be resilience and grit and humility and work ethic and risk tolerance. (26:06) I love that idea of like, obviously you have to have genetic gifts.(26:12) You have to be gifted, especially in sports. (26:15) But after that, it's all these intangibles that we're talking about.ing about.

Kevin Palmieri

(26:20) That would have to be like, we'd have to put some time aside for that episode.sode. (26:24) I feel like that'd be a long ass episode.sode. (26:26) For sure.(26:26) It'd be a good one for sure.sure. (26:29) How much of it is like parenting like Serena and Venus? (26:33) Like what are the odds of that?(26:34) Well, they've been playing tennis.nnis. (26:34) Have you seen it? (26:35) King Richard with Will?(26:36) No.

Alan Lazaros

(26:37) The movie is phenomenal. (26:40) Yeah. (26:40) They did a really good job with the film.

Kevin Palmieri

(26:43) It was, it was, it was a really. (26:45) But when did they start playing? (26:46) Like Tiger Woods was playing golf at like three, I think, or something.

Alan Lazaros

(26:49) Yeah. (26:50) And Serena and Venus, they were very young. (26:55) I believe it.(26:56) Very young. (26:57) Yeah. (26:57) And they were like being every day.(27:03) Yeah.

Kevin Palmieri

(27:03) Well, that's the thing is like school to play tennis.nnis. (27:06) They were forced to push it too far. (27:10) Yeah.(27:10) They didn't choose to.e to.

Alan Lazaros

(27:12) There was a younger and less likely to succeed too. (27:16) That's what I found fascinating.ting. (27:18) And I think that I have this a little bit with my sister.(27:20) She was always better than me when she was three years older for like the first several years of our life. (27:24) And then eventually I passed her. (27:25) But I do think that helped me.(27:27) Cause she, I remember we would play games and she'd stomp at everything for like years.ears. (27:32) And then eventually it was like, oh, and I just started surpassing her. (27:36) So I think being the younger underdog actually helps, even though your self-esteem definitely not.

Kevin Palmieri

(27:41) Yeah. (27:42) Well, and then think of like, think of child actors and actresses, like they get pushed beyond what they're capable of all the time.time. (27:49) And then we wonder why it seems like they lose their minds, quote unquote, for lack of better phrasing.(27:56) It's like, I don't, I used to think that wouldn't have happened to me.happened to me. (27:59) It probably, it would have happened to me. (28:00) I would have been egging houses and peeing, peeing on people's things too, most likely.kely.(28:04) So it would have been what I think, like, didn't, wasn't Bieber like peeing on people's houses or something?s or something? (28:09) Egging cars. (28:10) Like, dude, honestly.(28:12) Yeah. (28:12) I, I can see it. (28:14) I can see it.(28:15) I'd like to think I would be better than that, but at 16, I wouldn't, I wouldn't be.uldn't be. (28:19) Yeah. (28:20) I'd be peeing everywhere.here.(28:22) All right. (28:23) I enjoy this. (28:24) I enjoy this episode.(28:25) This is a good episode. (28:26) I enjoy this very much. (28:27) Same.(28:28) All right. (28:28) Next elimination. (28:28) If you are looking for a coach to help you figure out what the proper amount to bite off is based on your level of self-belief, based on your goals, based on your values, all of that stuff, Alan still has slots available.(28:40) We will have his link in the bio.

Alan Lazaros

(28:44) If, here's the thing, everyone in your life right now probably loves you and, or likes you, enjoys you for who you are now. now. (28:53) I will be the one person in your life that cares more about your future than your current. (28:57) I'll be the person who cares about your next level more than your current level.evel.(29:00) I'll be the person who cares more about your goals and dreams than I do your feelings.ings. (29:04) And I will be respectful. (29:06) But at the end of the day, I don't know if we have that person in our life.life.(29:10) The person who's willing to say, you're better than this.than this. (29:14) And you know it. (29:15) Who's willing to push you to your true potential.tial.(29:19) Because honestly, if we're all honest with ourselves, myself included, and I mean this, I know that I am better than this.this. (29:25) I know I got more in the tank. (29:26) I know, even though I'm pushing myself, I could push myself more.more.(29:31) And when I get around people that are stronger, and smarter, and more capable, and more wealthy, and more healthy, and more in love, it pushes you. (29:39) It raises the bar. (29:40) It raises the standard.(29:42) It's really important.tant. (29:44) So if you have people around you that you're ahead of, and you need someone who's going to make you uncomfortable, not in a negative way, but in a way of pushing you to your true potential, that's what I can do. what I can do. (29:58) And I'm not going to push you past what you're capable of.apable of.(30:01) I'll make sure you're shooting for the right goals in the right amount for the long term.long term. (30:09) And yeah, of course we're going to fail forward.ward. (30:11) Of course you're going to have self-esteem hits.hits.(30:13) However, they're not going to be devastating traumas.umas. (30:17) We're going to make sure we shoot for 10 and hit 9, or shoot for 7 and hit 6.it 6. (30:22) So if you want a coach who's conscientious, he's going to be there with you, and who's also leading by example as well.xample as well.(30:27) I had one person, last piece. (30:28) I had one person I coached once. (30:30) He's like, dude, you don't have to be the best at leading by example.y example.(30:34) I mean, half the coaches out there don't play football or basketball or whatever.ever. (30:38) I said, the best ones play basketball. (30:41) Imagine a basketball coach with 12, like who's the one with 12 NBA championships?hips?(30:46) I'm not the guy. guy.

Kevin Palmieri

(30:48) Not Phil Knight, Phil Jackson.

Alan Lazaros

(30:51) He played basketball. (30:53) I think that the best coach is someone who's been in the arena.rena. (30:59) Now, maybe I'm not in the exact same industry, but I'm definitely leading by example.y example.(31:04) His name was Mark. (31:05) You know who I'm talking about.bout. (31:06) He's like, dude, you don't need to be the best at that.t at that.(31:09) It's like, yes, I do.I do. (31:11) Yes, I do. (31:11) I'm not going to ask my clients to do things I'm not doing.not doing.(31:15) At least when it comes to principles. (31:16) So I'll lead by example as well.well. (31:18) I think that's a big deal.deal.

Kevin Palmieri

(31:19) I would agree. (31:20) I would agree. (31:20) All right, cool.(31:22) As always, we love you. (31:23) We appreciate you. (31:23) Grateful for each and every one of you.(31:25) And if you are as committed as you say you are to getting to the next level, make sure you tune in tomorrow because we will be here every single day to help you get there. (31:32) Keep leveling up to your true potential.

Alan Lazaros

(31:34) Next Level Nation.

Kevin Palmieri

(31:36) Thanks for joining us for another episode of Next Level University. (31:40) We love connecting with the Next Level family.

Alan Lazaros

(31:42) We mean it when we say family. (31:45) If you ever need anything, please reach out to us directly. (31:48) Everything you need to get ahold of us is in the show notes.(31:51) Thank you again, and we will talk to you tomorrow.

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Alan Lazaros

Host
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Kevin Palmieri

Host