Talking About Your Priorities Is USELESS (2326)

In today’s episode of Next Level University, hosts Kevin Palmieri and Alan Lazaros dismantle a common lie in personal development. Priorities are not defined by what you say. They are defined by what you do when conditions are inconvenient. This episode focuses on execution, identity, and non-negotiable standards. It challenges the gap between intention and behavior and highlights why consistency under pressure is the real measure of growth.

No motivation. No hype. Just the discipline required to build self-respect and long-term results. Press play. Then decide if your actions match your standards.

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Show notes:
(2:04) Talking priorities Vs. Living them
(5:09) Identity is built through non-negotiables
(9:12) Minimum standards under pressure
(12:07) When something is truly a priority
(18:22) Doing hard things consistently
(27:09) The five S’s of sustainable success
(33:21) Why growth always includes discomfort
(39:51) The real cost of high-level success
(43:52) Outro

🎙️ Hosted by Kevin Palmieri and Alan Lazaros

Next Level University is a top-ranked daily podcast for dream chasers and self-improvement lovers. With over 2,100 episodes, we help you level up in life, love, health, and wealth one day at a time. Subscribe for real, honest, no-fluff growth every single day.

Chapters

• 2:04 Talking priorities Vs. Living them
• 5:09 Identity is built through non-negotiables
• 9:12 Minimum standards under pressure
• 12:07 When something is truly a priority
• 18:22 Doing hard things consistently
• 27:09 The five S’s of sustainable success
• 33:21 Why growth always includes discomfort
• 39:51 The real cost of high-level success
• 43:52 Outro

Transcript

Kevin Palmieri

(0:00) We got two feet of snow in New Hampshire. (0:03) I went to the gym today and there was a very important lesson waiting for me at the gym that we're going to talk about in today's episode. (0:10) Big leg day today for Emilia and I as well.(0:13) The same lesson happened for me before Kevin and I even talked about it. (0:17) Welcome to Next Level University. (0:20) I'm your host, Kevin Palmieri.(0:22) And I'm your co-host, Alan Lazarus. (0:25) At NLU, we believe in a heart-driven, but no BS approach to holistic self-improvement for dream chasers. (0:31) Our goal with every episode is to help you level up your life, love, health, and wealth.(0:38) We bring you a new episode every single day on topics like confidence, self-belief, self-worth, self-awareness, relationships, boundaries, consistency, habits, and defining your own unique version of success. (0:54) Self-improvement in your pocket, every day, from anywhere, completely free. (1:00) Welcome to Next Level University.(1:06) Next Level Nation today for episode number 2,327, talking about your priorities is useless. (1:14) Especially if you talk about your priorities and then you do not execute on them. (1:18) So it is, what's today?(1:21) Today is the 26th of January. (1:22) Well, when we're recording this, and I know a lot of us probably said we were going to be more consistent in the gym and we were going to turn things around or whatever it is. (1:30) We had a big snowstorm, especially in New Hampshire.(1:33) We got almost too few snow. (1:35) I went to the gym and everybody there, there was probably like five people there. (1:39) They were all super jacked and probably getting ready for a competition.(1:46) At least one of them, maybe two. (1:49) I mean, these dudes were like jacked, super lean, like just specimens of human beings. (1:56) Love it.(1:57) But of course they are committed regardless of circumstance. (2:04) Yeah, I know it's cold and I know shoveling snow is a pain in the ass and maybe you've got to drive a little bit more carefully on the roads and maybe it takes a little bit longer to get to the gym. (2:13) But going back to one episodes we did recently, some people talk about their priorities and other people act on them.(2:19) And I just think if this podcast is an example of anything and our stories and what we try to share, the goal is always to say, look, let's take a look in the mirror. (2:29) Are we actually showing up as much as we're talking? (2:34) And if not, what can we do to get there?(2:36) And myself and Alan are obviously included in that. (2:41) Brother, if I was ever going to break the streak of exercise. (2:47) Yesterday would have been it.(2:50) Yesterday. (2:51) So March 1st of 2022, brief story here. (2:57) I know a lot of you know this.(2:59) I said, I want to beat my best. (3:01) I want to go for four months. (3:02) My old best was three months in a row without missing.(3:05) Got to four months, kept going, got to a year, kept going. (3:08) Emilia said, let's do this for the rest of our life. (3:11) I said, are you sure?(3:12) Cause once I say this, I can't not do it. (3:14) She said, no, I'm sure let's do it. (3:16) And it's been 1426 days as of today.(3:21) Okay. (3:22) Yesterday I felt horrible stomach. (3:26) I thought I was going to throw up bathroom.(3:30) Wasn't a good day for me. (3:33) Headache. (3:34) Not great.(3:35) Now I, you know, and I said to myself, you still have to fucking exercise. (3:41) This is going to be terrible. (3:43) And to your point, there's a lot of snow.(3:45) So not only are you going to have to exercise, you got to put on your boots, jacket, the whole nine. (3:50) Brother, there's a movie called Sisu. (3:53) Have you ever seen it?(3:54) S-I-S-U. (3:55) No. (3:56) You would enjoy it a lot.(3:57) It's Sisu is a Finnish word. (4:00) It's a guy from Finland during World War II. (4:02) It's it's fiction.(4:03) It's not real. (4:04) Definitely not. (4:05) But Sisu is a word that basically means when all hope is lost, you mind over matter.(4:11) You get it done. (4:12) It's like a mindset thing. (4:13) And it's a pretty gory movie for anyone who watches it.(4:16) Just proceed with caution. (4:17) Definitely don't watch it with kids, but I do think you'll like it. (4:21) This dude is the most gritty human of any movie I've ever seen.(4:25) Any character in any film, fiction or nonfiction. (4:28) I love that. (4:29) Yeah, I think you will like it.(4:31) And I told Emilia, I said, I got to Sisu up here. (4:35) I got to get it together. (4:36) This is this is brutal.(4:39) Got my shit on. (4:40) We went out. (4:41) I was walking, doing okay.(4:44) By the end, I was jogging in the snow with my boots, genuinely jogging. (4:50) And we were playful. (4:52) We had fun.(4:52) Like it ended up being a good 60 minutes. (4:56) And I said, apparently, I just needed to get my blood flowing. (4:59) I just needed to get up and get after it.(5:01) Now, regardless, if I hobbled the whole time, I still would have done it. (5:05) Because I'm not going to break the streak because it's not about the streak. (5:09) It's not about those 60 minutes.(5:11) It's about the identity. (5:15) There's a great quote in a book called Atomic Habits by James Clear, where he says, every action you take is a vote for the type of person you wish to become. (5:23) The goal is not to read.(5:25) It's to become a reader. (5:27) The goal is not to run. (5:29) The goal is to become a runner.(5:30) The goal is not to lift weights. (5:31) The goal is to become a weightlifter. (5:34) To me, it's about the identity of being dialed in.(5:38) It's not no one else would care if I broke the streak. (5:40) But I would care. (5:42) Just like you and I, if we didn't record an episode tomorrow, no one else would care.(5:45) Everybody would forget. (5:46) We wouldn't forget. (5:47) It's about who you become.(5:48) And I think Sisu is a gritty word that helps me pull out the best in me. (5:54) The lesser self would have said, fuck it. (5:57) Can the streak.(5:58) Nobody will care. (5:59) It's not a big deal. (6:00) I'll care.(6:01) This is a promise I made to me. (6:03) And this is a promise I made to Emilia. (6:05) And I'm not going to let her down 1426 days in.(6:10) And so we got it together. (6:12) She got my boots out for me. (6:14) She helped.(6:14) And we got out there. (6:16) And I'm glad we did, man. (6:17) I feel like a million bucks today.(6:19) Now, I did realize yesterday when I felt horrible in the morning, I woke up feeling really terrible. (6:28) It's the worst I've felt in a long time. (6:30) I did realize that I must seem a little bit psycho to some people.(6:35) For sure. (6:36) Okay. (6:37) Thank you for that verification.(6:39) Because I remember in the past, I'll share this. (6:44) I think this was back in like 2011, 2012. (6:47) This is way back.(6:48) I watched, this is when The Rock started posting content on Instagram and YouTube. (6:54) And I watched his content. (6:56) I remember one night I told you this.(6:57) It was like late. (6:58) It was after a party. (6:58) I was really down.(6:59) I think some girl was bothering me, something. (7:03) And I was like, you know what? (7:04) I'm just going to watch this.(7:06) And I went to his Instagram. (7:07) And I remember I went down the rabbit hole of YouTube. (7:09) And I saw The Rock had this stretch of like a decade where the dude was dialed.(7:16) Now, I am not, I haven't met The Rock. (7:19) I don't know The Rock. (7:20) I'm not.(7:21) The reason I'm using him as a reference is because at one point he inspired the hell out of me and everyone knows who he is. (7:26) Okay. (7:27) That's it.(7:27) Nothing beyond that. (7:30) Like him, love him, hate him, don't care. (7:32) The dude is really hardworking.(7:35) And I won't take that from him. (7:36) That dude fucking works. (7:38) And I remember back then, I had this moment that night where I was like, I want to be like that.(7:46) I want to be so dialed in that it inspires other people. (7:51) Because I was inspired by that. (7:56) It was like, this dude gets after it every day.(7:59) This dude never misses. (8:01) This dude is on point. (8:03) And I think that last piece, I know I'm going off here.(8:07) I've coached people for 11 years. (8:09) I always ask, when were you the most fulfilled? (8:14) Never once has someone said, well, I was sloughing off and I was partying.(8:18) And I was really just letting myself down. (8:20) And I was mostly just effing off. (8:22) I didn't really care much.(8:23) I didn't have goals. (8:24) I was chilling. (8:24) I was watching Netflix.(8:26) No one once has ever said I was the most fulfilled when I was that way. (8:30) Everyone, when they say they were the most fulfilled, everyone I've ever talked to in coaching says I was dialed in. (8:38) I was on fire.(8:39) I was getting after it. (8:40) I was goals. (8:41) I was goal oriented.(8:43) I was studying every single day. (8:45) People in college. (8:47) Everyone is the most fulfilled when they are proud of who they are.(8:51) They're proud of themselves. (8:52) And you can't be proud of yourself and let yourself down all the time. (8:55) Last piece.(8:57) I don't give a fuck if it's snowing. (8:59) I don't give a fuck if I have a fever. (9:01) I don't care.(9:03) Circumstances outside of me are not going to dictate what I do and don't do. (9:07) Now, does that mean I'm going to run a marathon yesterday when I feel terrible? (9:10) No, but you've got to hit your minimums.(9:12) You've got to hit your minimums. (9:14) My minimum is 60 minutes of exercise every single day. (9:18) Sometimes it's hit training that's intense where I'm throwing up basically because it's so intense.(9:23) Other times it's walking, but I will not miss my minimums. (9:28) Yesterday it started out as a walk, more of a limp, and then eventually it was me running in the snow and laughing with Emilia and feeling much better. (9:36) I feel great today, so whatever it was, passed quick.(9:39) But at the end of the day, mind over matter. (9:44) Mind over matter. (9:46) I could have easily let my body win instead of my mind.(9:50) Mind over matter. (9:53) I said, Alan, come on. (9:55) Viktor Frankl in World War II, concentration camp.(9:57) You think he didn't want to get up and he was barefoot in the snow. (10:01) You got this. (10:02) Come on.(10:03) What are we doing here? (10:05) Pull your fucking self together. (10:06) That's how it works for me.(10:08) I don't know if other people are like that, but at the end of the day, it's important because you feel like a million bucks when you're dialed in. (10:16) Well, that's the thing. (10:19) Either way, you're going to feel like shit.(10:21) You might as well feel like shit and get your goals. (10:24) When I don't feel good, don't do this, I'm not saying to do this, but when I used to drink a lot and be hungover, I would always go to the gym and I always felt better. (10:35) Almost every time.(10:37) Now, getting there was horrid. (10:40) Horrible. (10:40) It was terrible.(10:42) But once I got moving, once the blood got flowing, once I drank enough water, I started to feel pretty good. (10:48) I haven't done that in a long time, but I think the hard part about this is when you set the goal, the priorities are kind of sexy in the beginning. (11:01) Making it a priority and saying, nah, I can't come, I have this, is kind of sexy in the beginning because you get significance to a degree.(11:10) Like, ah, good for you. (11:12) Good for you. (11:14) I went golfing with my brother-in-law, Tyron's brother, and I don't remember.(11:23) Oh no, no, it wasn't. (11:25) I think it was Christmas Eve. (11:26) He was like, dude, it blows.(11:28) I still got to go for a seven mile run today. (11:31) I was like, seven miles? (11:32) He's like, yeah, man, I'm going to do a half marathon or another marathon.

Alan Lazaros

(11:35) I was like, good for you, man.

Kevin Palmieri

(11:36) Fuck yeah. (11:36) Good for you. (11:38) That's also probably a giant pain in the ass for many of the people that care about you, but good for you.(11:43) Good for you for keeping it a priority. (11:45) I think it's easy in the beginning because we get a lot of good feelings and some people compliment us on it. (11:53) But that, I'm telling you, if I could leave any lesson for you, whether you're watching or listening, and again, this is all I really have experience in, specifically the podcast thing for as long as we've done it for, but it's always a priority.(12:07) It's never a question of whether or not we're going to do it, ever. (12:13) There's never a question. (12:15) That's been really nice.(12:16) It's the best. (12:17) You and I last week, you're traveling, and I was late to one of the recordings we were going to do by 20 minutes or 15 minutes or something like that. (12:26) I remember thinking, how interesting is it that I know Kevin's there?(12:31) I don't have to text him. (12:32) I'm always there. (12:33) You and I are very dialed in on our calendar.(12:36) If it's on the calendar, we're both there. (12:38) It's a priority. (12:40) It's a priority.(12:42) We had a conversation the other day where it was like, Alan said, hey man, I don't remember what it was. (12:48) I need you to take an L for us. (12:51) Whatever it was.(12:52) Then the next day we showed up to record and I said, I need you to take an L today. (12:57) I need to push something until tomorrow because it is a priority. (13:01) We got time.(13:02) We're in flow. (13:04) It's going to probably take a second for me to find it though. (13:08) It was something along the lines of, we're always going to have to sacrifice for the company.(13:12) I just don't want it always to be the same person. (13:14) Well, and you said, I think we should do what's best for the business. (13:18) Yeah.(13:19) Let's do what's best for the business. (13:21) Fortunately, oftentimes that's me taking a shovel. (13:23) I said, I'm back to backs all day.(13:26) Taking the BGU slot, I do believe is what's best for the company. (13:29) If you don't agree, I want you to argue it. (13:32) When we are both Jeffed, someone's always going to take the hit.(13:35) And I think the principle always needs to be whatever's best for the company and the mission. (13:39) We both take hits consistently, battles no one else will ever see. (13:44) I didn't expect to read this, but I think we need to at least have that mindset together because we're always both going to have to make sacrifices basically for the rest of our life.(13:54) What was my response? (13:56) Didn't I push back? (13:57) You said, haha, I would probably vote that I have been taking the bigger hits lately since I am up at 4am driving around the fucking state of Massachusetts.(14:08) And there's some other things in there. (14:11) And running the biggest podcast production company, this side of Mississippi. (14:18) Are we getting one done now or both in that slot?(14:21) Nevermind, saw the calendar event. (14:22) Haha, so you ended up taking that L? (14:27) There's a lot of L's to be taken.(14:29) Somebody has to. (14:31) I think that is the biggest difference. (14:34) Goal setting is a whole thing.(14:35) It's really hard to set goals. (14:36) It's really hard to, yes, reverse engineering, that's yes. (14:40) But even when you are given the plan for exactly what to do, you still have to make it a priority.(14:47) It doesn't matter if you know exactly how to do it. (14:49) You still have to say yes to that and no to everything else. (14:51) And I don't care what shit you watch on YouTube.(14:54) I don't care. (14:56) Sure, maybe now they say that they can frolic and everything's fine. (14:59) For 25 years, they focus on the priority.(15:02) They just did. (15:06) And I don't know. (15:08) There's no way around that.(15:09) Nope. (15:10) If you really, really, really want to be next level, you have to prioritize being next level. (15:16) That is it in a nutshell, in its simplest form.(15:18) And it's also very challenging because there are a billion polls on your attention. (15:25) You and I were talking about this off air, but some of your goals, people around you don't even want you to accomplish because you're already ahead of them. (15:35) The last thing they want you to be is more ahead of them.(15:37) So they're going to try to hold you back. (15:39) It's hard. (15:40) It's hard as shit.(15:41) That's my hypothesis in today's episode. (15:44) It's hard as shit. (15:46) Before we hit record today, well, there's one that we sort of did and then my camera was going nuts.(15:51) So we had to can it. (15:52) So there's a lot of things behind the scenes that don't get seen. (15:55) But my throat isn't great right now.(15:59) But there's always going to be a reason not to do it. (16:02) Oh, we don't have as much time today. (16:04) Oh, I don't want to work late today.(16:05) Oh, my throat isn't great. (16:07) Oh, I don't feel well. (16:08) Oh, I have a stomach ache.(16:09) Oh, I gotta go to the bathroom. (16:10) There's always reasons not to do it. (16:12) There's always, there's never going to be, if I had a nickel for every time I say to myself, Alan, if it was supposed to be easy, everybody would do it.(16:21) It's the hard that makes it great. (16:24) What meaning comes from, why is the most sought after part of a physique a six pack? (16:30) Because it's the hardest one to get and the hardest one to keep.(16:33) That's why everyone wants one. (16:35) And because you can show it off. (16:38) But you can show it off.(16:39) If everyone had a six pack, you couldn't show it off. (16:41) No, no, I know. (16:41) I know.(16:42) In my mind, I think there's harder things to do, like squatting a certain amount or dead lifting a certain, but nobody ever sees that. (16:48) So it doesn't matter.

Alan Lazaros

(16:49) That's all I hear.

Kevin Palmieri

(16:51) My camera's doing the thing again. (16:53) But it's not just that. (16:54) It's because the majority of people want a six pack.

Alan Lazaros

(16:59) It's very rare.

Kevin Palmieri

(17:00) It's very rare. (17:01) And why is it rare? (17:02) Let's just do this.(17:03) Why is 2300 episodes rare? (17:06) Because it's really fucking hard. (17:09) I think it's because even if we were to talk about the six pack thing, it's because it's directly against what's easy, what's easy and what's comfortable and what is normal.(17:21) It's like the complete opposite of what you think you should be doing, essentially. (17:26) When I was in the gym this morning, I had the same moment you had. (17:29) There was two people in there that were pretty diehard.(17:32) The gym was empty this morning. (17:33) Yeah. (17:34) And I know why.(17:35) I get it. (17:36) But I did have the moment in the workout where I was like, why is it so empty? (17:43) Is everyone just shoveling?(17:45) Or did they just pack it in? (17:47) Brother, I don't want circumstances to dictate my life. (17:57) And for the next level listeners, this is a success and personal development podcast.(18:01) This is a... (18:02) That all blended into one word. (18:03) This is a success and personal development podcast.(18:07) If we weren't talking about success, you can go do whatever you want. (18:10) Go do whatever you want. (18:12) If you want to be successful, healthy, wealthy, and in love, it's going to require you consistently do things you don't want to do.(18:22) Consistently.

Alan Lazaros

(18:23) Yes, yeah.

Kevin Palmieri

(18:24) Every day for the rest of your life. (18:28) I love this. (18:29) I don't know if this lands for you, but I heard a speaker on stage.(18:32) It was Darren Hardy. (18:33) And he said, what do successful people and unsuccessful people have in common? (18:39) And the audience answered.(18:40) And he said, they both hate to do what it takes to be successful. (18:45) The successful people just do it anyway. (18:48) You and I didn't want to go.(18:51) You did. (18:52) You were itching. (18:52) I did.(18:52) I did. (18:53) Yeah, you did. (18:53) But that's also because you wanted to be different.(18:56) You wanted to be... (18:57) That was part of your identity. (18:58) You used to always go when you were hungover or snowstorms.(19:01) And I was the same way. (19:02) But there's something to that. (19:04) I have to go.(19:07) Why? (19:07) Because I know most people won't. (19:11) Call it ego if you want to.(19:12) I don't care. (19:14) You have to separate yourself somehow. (19:20) Back to The Rock.(19:20) I'll say this briefly. (19:21) He has a speech that I watch. (19:23) I haven't watched in a while.(19:24) But he said, like, he would get made fun of. (19:26) It's like, how much shit you gonna do? (19:28) How many movies you gonna make?(19:29) And he would get made fun of. (19:32) And he's like, in what world do we not work every day? (19:36) What?(19:38) Now hard work is a fucking problem? (19:41) When did that become not... (19:42) When did hard work become not cool?(19:46) Brother. (19:48) I'm old school, man. (19:50) I'm telling you.(19:51) I don't like the 21st century that much. (19:54) Like, it's gotten mediocrities all around us. (19:58) It's crazy.(19:59) It's cool to not work now? (20:03) Good luck with that mentality. (20:05) Good luck with that attitude.(20:06) Yeah, you're in trouble for sure. (20:08) Every one of us can think of that person in high school. (20:10) Who was naturally gifted and had no work ethic.(20:14) There's someone I'm thinking of who was just rock star athlete. (20:17) Didn't have to try at all. (20:19) Never once lost shot put and didn't even have to try.(20:23) That attitude, that strategy cannot work long term. (20:26) It can't. (20:27) Because then you go to college.(20:28) It's like, oh shit. (20:30) Okay, well now everyone's talented. (20:32) But some of these people really work hard.(20:35) Then you get to the pros and it's like, okay. (20:36) Everyone here is talented and everyone works hard. (20:39) And now my paycheck depends on it.(20:43) You'll only go as far as your commitment. (20:45) You'll only go as far as you prioritize it. (20:47) Kevin and I, last piece.(20:52) I don't know if I told this story on the air before. (20:54) But I had a client recently who has a young team. (20:57) They're in their early 20s.(21:00) And he's 30. (21:01) No, he's 40. (21:01) Just turned 40.(21:02) Shout out to you, brother. (21:04) And they were in a meeting. (21:05) Did I share this before?(21:08) I don't know. (21:09) It's about responsibility. (21:11) Oh, yes.(21:12) Okay. (21:13) Not on here. (21:14) I think you and I talked about it or something.(21:15) Okay. (21:16) They were in a team meeting. (21:17) They do one every week.(21:18) Team huddle. (21:19) Let's get after the week. (21:21) Peak performing team.(21:23) And one of the younger, newer guys is like, yeah, I had this going on. (21:27) I had this going on. (21:28) I just had this going on.(21:29) I had too many responsibilities right now. (21:31) And my client, who's the leader of the team, stopped. (21:33) He said, hold up.(21:35) Let's just talk candidly here for a second. (21:37) You have the least responsibility in this whole room. (21:40) By far.(21:42) I've got a wife at home, two kids, multiple houses. (21:46) Like, you have the least responsibility. (21:48) You're 22.(21:51) I think we let people get away with a lot of fucking excuses. (21:55) We do. (21:56) I had to talk to a client earlier today.(21:58) Brother, do you want me to be hard on you? (22:00) Because no one else cares if you achieve your goals. (22:02) Nobody else cares.(22:03) They feel better about themselves when you don't achieve your goals. (22:07) He's like, you got to be hard on me. (22:09) I said, good.(22:10) What the fuck are we doing? (22:12) Get it together. (22:13) You are so much better than this.(22:16) And I feel like there's got to be some value to that. (22:19) I don't think we can just baby ourselves all the time. (22:21) Like, we got to graduate from kindergarten every now and then.(22:23) I don't mean to be mean. (22:25) I just want to be honest. (22:26) Like, I could have easily skipped yesterday.(22:29) But Emilia doesn't... (22:30) We don't play like that. (22:31) This morning, she's like, I think we should do pliability this morning and we'll go to the gym tonight.(22:35) I said, no. (22:37) Gotta go to the gym this morning. (22:38) There's something about snowstorms for me too.(22:40) I gotta go to the gym this morning. (22:41) I told her. (22:42) I said, I've been looking forward to this leg day since yesterday afternoon.(22:46) I've been thinking about it, dreaming about it, contemplating it. (22:49) I can't wait. (22:50) And I hit a PR today.(22:51) And I know, and I told her on the way home, I said, that PR would not have happened. (22:56) It's a volume PR, it's for five. (22:57) But that PR would not have happened if we didn't go in the morning.(23:00) If we went at night after a freaking full day, I wouldn't have gotten that. (23:04) And she was totally fine with it, by the way. (23:05) We weren't yelling at each other by any means.(23:07) This was a very candid, kind conversation. (23:10) Very respectful. (23:11) But she's like, okay, fair.(23:13) We don't let each other off the hook, dude. (23:15) We don't. (23:15) We have a fucking adult relationship and it's great.(23:19) And she was never gonna let me off the hook on that just because I don't feel good. (23:25) She was very sweet to me. (23:27) She was very kind.(23:28) She helped me out. (23:29) But we don't baby each other, you know? (23:33) And there's a fine line.(23:35) Like, you gotta figure that line out for you. (23:36) But at the end of the day, when it comes to success, nobody cares about your goals. (23:42) Nobody cares.(23:44) You have to be the last line of defense. (23:46) And hopefully you have some peak performance partners that have the courage to actually tell you to get your shit together. (23:51) I have so many bodybuilding stories.(23:54) Because when I was doing my bodybuilding prep, I was working with a job that required a ton of travel. (24:00) So I literally brought a hot plate to the hotel. (24:09) And I would cook my salmon in the hotel room on the hot plate.(24:13) That's what's up. (24:14) And I blew the fuse and it shut down the lights to half the hotel. (24:19) And it was a whole...(24:20) And it stunk. (24:21) I mean, I'm cooking salmon in a Red Roof Inn. (24:23) This is not ideal.(24:26) I remember we were driving back from New Jersey and I had to get a meal in. (24:30) And I literally didn't have a fork or a spoon. (24:33) I lost it.(24:34) I was eating my rice with a chicken tender. (24:36) Yeah, I love that story. (24:38) I just used that as...(24:39) Now again, am I telling you you have to get to that? (24:41) No, that's heavy. (24:44) But...(24:44) I love it. (24:45) I know, but you're also... (24:46) I don't think you and I could have got here without shit like that.(24:48) No, no, I know. (24:49) But you know me. (24:50) I'm not telling people they have to do what I do.(24:53) Yeah, agreed. (24:53) I'm not saying... (24:54) You have to do your version of that.(24:56) I think moving in a healthy direction with that. (25:00) We're getting ready to start the 10 pound in 10 week challenge. (25:03) Do you know how I know I'll do it?(25:05) Because I'll just make it more of a priority. (25:08) If that sounds arrogant, I don't mean it that way. (25:11) I've just done this many times and I know how much of a priority Alan was pushing me.(25:15) He's like, dude, I said, give me like February 15th. (25:19) Dude, I'm moving. (25:20) I'm going.(25:20) I'm traveling to see a client twice a week. (25:22) Like, I need some time. (25:24) He's like, February 2nd.(25:25) I said, dude, I can't do February. (25:27) No, no, I said February. (25:28) I said Monday.(25:29) Yeah, I said Monday.

Alan Lazaros

(25:30) I was like, dude, Monday.

Kevin Palmieri

(25:31) It's Monday we're recording this. (25:33) That's only seven days away. (25:34) He's like, all right, let's do the first.(25:37) And I was like, all right, we can do the first. (25:38) And then I thought it was Sunday. (25:40) That was the day before I actually wanted to do it.(25:43) You know, one of the reasons I was hesitant, not because I don't think I can do it, because I know I have moving and a lot of other moving pieces going on right now that are priorities. (25:55) So I know fitting that in is going to be a little bit of a challenge to get started here. (26:01) And I'll figure it out.(26:02) Right. (26:03) But that maybe that's an important conversation for another day is when you set goals, you also have to understand your priorities are immediately going to have to shift. (26:11) Always.(26:11) Immediately. (26:12) So we talked about yesterday. (26:14) Did we?(26:15) Not that topic, but that when we went through the three buckets of the different goals, we talked about the shifting priorities and what you do and don't do. (26:23) I don't. (26:24) Not yesterday, but it was earlier today.(26:25) Yeah, I literally don't even remember. (26:28) Remember we were talking about at the beginning, it's more like a sprint. (26:31) Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.(26:32) You work hard, then you work smart, then you have to sustain it. (26:36) Also, I think, I think I fucked up the episodes. (26:39) I think this is 2326, not 27.(26:44) Do you know what I said at the beginning? (26:45) No idea. (26:46) Pretty sure it's 2326.(26:48) Welcome. (26:49) Last thing. (26:50) Yeah.(26:52) So you and I have a digital asset of the five S's of success. (26:57) Success is at the center of the star. (26:59) I'm going to put the link in the show notes.(27:00) So success is at the center of a five-pointed star, and at the bottom left, it starts and it goes clockwise. (27:07) All right. (27:08) Sacrifice is first.(27:09) So once you set a goal, okay, then you have to do these five S's. (27:13) Number one is sacrifice. (27:14) So I'm going to use 10 pounds in 10 weeks, just as an example, because we're doing a fitness challenge.(27:19) By the way, I have another person that just signed up. (27:22) Shout out to anyone who's doing the 10 pound in 10 week challenge. (27:27) If you want to do it, you want in.(27:30) The start date is February 1st. (27:32) The end date is April 11th. (27:33) It's exactly 70 days.(27:36) So 10 pounds, 10 weeks, 70 divided by 10. (27:39) 70 divided by 7 is 10. (27:41) Okay.(27:42) So 10 pounds, 10 weeks. (27:44) So that's the goal. (27:45) Now think of this star.(27:46) The first thing you have to do is sacrifice. (27:48) Sacrifice what? (27:49) Maybe you have to wake up a little earlier or go to bed a little later.(27:53) Maybe you have to eat more rice. (27:55) We just got a rice cooker, a bigger one. (27:58) It's nice.(28:00) I think it was 17 bucks, but I think it's nice. (28:04) Why? (28:05) Because white rice is so filling and it's only 170 calories per cup dry.(28:12) Look, this is what always fucks me. (28:14) No, because I can't do it. (28:15) I don't know how to measure it.(28:16) I cooked, cooked. (28:18) No, that's my bad. (28:19) One fourth cup dry is one full cup cooked.(28:23) Yeah, 170 calories, one cup cooked. (28:25) I eat one cup dry. (28:28) Yeah, that's four cups cooked.(28:30) Yeah, I think it's like 600 and whatever, do the math. (28:33) But I eat that. (28:34) Whatever, it's 170 times 4.(28:36) 34, I can't do the math. (28:37) Yeah, 680. (28:38) One cup cooked is 170, which is good because you get full.(28:41) If you do rice and broccoli, you're so full. (28:43) I get full. (28:44) I have to do a whole cup.(28:46) That's what I do. (28:48) I know that. (28:49) So that gets me full.(28:50) You're getting full. (28:51) What are you, a bird? (28:53) You get full off a quarter cup of rice?(28:55) No, I'm not. (28:56) No, I was just saying the calories. (28:58) That's bird-like behavior.(29:02) Brother, I will go toe to toe with you in a rice eating contest anytime you want. (29:07) No, I was just saying 170 calories is one cup cooked of rice. (29:11) One fourth cup dry.(29:12) But you said you got full. (29:14) No, I'm saying rice fills you up fast. (29:16) Oh, okay.(29:16) I don't do one fourth cup. (29:20) I throw a full cup in there and then I put four cups of water. (29:24) I do.(29:24) I split it with Emilia. (29:25) I'm not eating just that. (29:27) This is me trying to fill my stomach because we're in a cut now because I like to eat.(29:32) I just, same. (29:33) I understand. (29:35) This is a cheat code for anybody.(29:37) You eat a whole bag of Brussels sprouts, you're going to be fine. (29:40) Your stomach's going to hurt so bad, you're not going to want to eat anything. (29:42) You're going to be so gassy, you can't imagine eating anything else.(29:45) That is the key. (29:48) Broccoli, asparagus. (29:50) Basically, side tangent here, if anyone who wants to be into fitness here and learn some fitness, high volume, low calorie foods.(29:58) Yes. (29:59) Right. (29:59) Whole foods.(30:02) That's, I mean, one ingredient foods. (30:05) Broccoli, cauliflower, asparagus. (30:07) You've had cauliflower rice?(30:08) Rice. (30:09) Yes, I have. (30:10) It's a good little hack.(30:11) It is. (30:12) It's all good. (30:12) And then you just get some sauces that are low-cal.(30:14) The dope is dope. (30:15) Okay. (30:16) What was I talking about before that?(30:18) Oh, the five S's. (30:20) Yeah. (30:20) So you set a goal, 10 pounds in 10 weeks challenge.(30:22) The first one is sacrifice. (30:23) So I don't really want to eat a bunch of rice, but I will. (30:25) That's a sacrifice for me.(30:27) Okay. (30:28) Suffer. (30:29) Struggle.(30:29) First, it's like, ah, this is tough. (30:31) I'm putting all this food down. (30:32) Eh, I don't know.(30:33) I don't know if I want rice tonight. (30:35) Broccoli, not a huge fan. (30:36) It's fine.(30:37) It's not that big a fan. (30:40) Then it's suffer. (30:41) Suffer is last, yesterday.(30:43) For me yesterday, that was, this is pretty rough. (30:48) I don't let myself off the hook much. (30:50) So it's hard for me to say like, this is really rough.(30:51) Alan, you didn't lose a leg. (30:53) Like you're fine. (30:54) Right.(30:54) But it was definitely like, wow. (30:56) Oh my goodness. (30:57) Am I being kind of a pansy?(30:59) I need to do better. (31:00) And yes, I'm proud of myself. (31:01) It is what it is.(31:02) Okay. (31:02) The fourth one, you know, you love it. (31:05) You know, you love it.(31:06) I love it for you. (31:08) I just know for most, I'm very much that way too. (31:10) Have you ever had that?(31:11) Of course. (31:11) Where you're like, I'm sitting there about to puke on the yoga mat. (31:15) And I'm like, Alan, you're fine.(31:19) Yes, of course. (31:20) And yes, I use the word pansy in my head. (31:22) I took the trash out last night in the snow.(31:25) And I was like, I'm gonna wear my sandals. (31:26) And Taryn's like, why are you going to wear your sandals? (31:28) I was like, cause I, I don't know.(31:29) I just want to. (31:30) Yeah. (31:30) What if you fall and crack your head?(31:31) I was like, well, if I don't come back in 10 minutes, you'll know where to find me. (31:34) It was cold. (31:36) Yeah.(31:36) It was chill. (31:37) Every now and then you got to test yourself. (31:39) You got to, you got to live.(31:40) You got to live a little bit. (31:41) I'm with you. (31:41) Feel what it's, feel what it's like outside the gate.(31:44) You know, feel what it's like. (31:45) You are more grateful for the warm home. (31:47) For sure.(31:47) I'm glad we're talking about this. (31:48) I feel like you don't, you, you and I don't share enough of that. (31:51) I think I probably do.(31:52) I think you do plenty.

Alan Lazaros

(31:54) You don't.

Kevin Palmieri

(31:55) Because dude, without that, there's no way. (31:57) I know, but I'm always trying. (31:58) Look, my, my thing is, I don't.(32:02) I think everybody could benefit from moving in that direction. (32:05) I'd never suggest anybody does what I do. (32:07) That's okay.(32:07) Is there anyone, you know, who wouldn't benefit from moving in that direction? (32:13) I don't think so. (32:13) No.(32:15) Boom. (32:15) A little snow on your toes. (32:17) Good for you.(32:18) Don't get frostbite. (32:19) Don't be stupid. (32:20) No, it's controlled.(32:21) Yeah.

Alan Lazaros

(32:22) It's, that's the thing.

Kevin Palmieri

(32:23) It's still in a control. (32:24) It's a controlled circumstance, but it's an unoptimal. (32:28) What's the, what's the right?(32:29) Not optimal.

Alan Lazaros

(32:31) Suboptimal.

Kevin Palmieri

(32:31) It's a controlled circumstance with a suboptimal, um, circumstance. (32:38) Nice. (32:39) Suffering by choice grows a part of your brain called the frontal lateral prefrontal cortex.(32:45) It's willpower muscle. (32:48) Your brain will be better at doing hard things when you purposely put it in pain. (32:53) I'm not saying to purposely get frostbite.(32:56) I am saying every now and then go out in your sandals. (32:58) I do the same thing. (32:59) Just so you can feel what it's like to appreciate your warm, heated, amazing home.(33:06) When there are some people that have to tretch through the snow and bare feet because of a, you know, if something happens, you know, you need to be able to handle it. (33:13) Okay. (33:14) Sacrifice, struggle, suffer, and then success.(33:19) Success. (33:20) I don't think you can succeed. (33:21) I know this is a bold statement.(33:23) I don't think you can succeed without at least a little bit of suffering. (33:27) I don't. (33:28) Same.(33:28) And no one talks about it. (33:30) You're not going to get this on YouTube. (33:32) As a matter of fact, I saw a YouTube video yesterday that said, why would you ever suffer?(33:37) Because that's necessary to achieve magnificent goals. (33:40) You're never going to talk to an Olympic athlete and be like, oh yeah, no, it was easy peasy. (33:45) Well, if so, you should have won more medals, my friend.(33:48) Damn straight.

Alan Lazaros

(33:49) You could have won more medals.

Kevin Palmieri

(33:50) Always a little bit. (33:51) And then the last one is sustain. (33:52) That's Kevin's least favorite.(33:55) It's not my least favorite. (33:56) I just think it's one of the hardest. (33:58) Which one's your least favorite?(34:01) I don't like any of them. (34:04) I'm not a fan. (34:05) I suffer, probably.(34:07) I think suffer might be my favorite, but that's like a little ego piece of, you know. (34:15) I think that's like a differentiator.

Alan Lazaros

(34:17) If you're willing to suffer.

Kevin Palmieri

(34:18) Which one's the one that you think people need the most? (34:21) Probably sacrifice, because I think once you get into it, I think a lot of us aren't willing to trade. (34:28) We're not willing to trade up.(34:34) The Patriots have been playing in some big games on Sunday. (34:38) So I got, by got, YouTube TV back. (34:41) I mean, I signed up for a 10-day free membership and then canceled it today.(34:44) So I don't have to pay for any of it. (34:45) Nice. (34:46) I was like, oh my God, I have missed this so much.(34:50) This is incredible. (34:51) This is, oh my goodness, this is like a different world. (34:54) Because we canceled it a year ago when we were focused on finances and saving as much money as humanly possible.(34:58) And while that's a very, very different world, it's a very different world. (35:00) First world sacrifice. (35:02) It's going back to it as a reminder of like, oh my goodness, we have like really tried to be very, very disciplined when it comes to a lot of things.(35:09) And it's, it's really, really paid off. (35:11) So that's an example for everybody. (35:13) A very simple example.(35:15) Credit card companies make you believe you don't have to sacrifice. (35:19) Oh yeah. (35:20) How does that work out?(35:21) How does that work out? (35:22) You end up suffering way more in the long run if you're not smart about it. (35:26) If you are smart about it, you can get cash back without any problems.(35:30) But I think that's a good metaphor. (35:32) There is no way to get to the next level without crawling through some mud. (35:36) And I'm grateful that we talk about that.(35:37) I think we're very honest about that. (35:38) I think that's what makes this show unique. (35:41) And if you want level 10 success, you're going to have to sacrifice at level 10, struggle at level 10, suffer at level 10, succeed at level 10, and then sustain at level 10.(35:52) If you want to succeed at level 3, you're only going to have to sacrifice at level 3 and struggle at level 3 and suffer at level 3. (35:58) So I do believe that's true. (36:00) And the differentiating factor for you might be those other ones.(36:05) For you, I know you felt maybe not smart enough in the past. (36:08) And so you had to suffer more and sacrifice more. (36:10) And that's what got you here.(36:12) And I think we would be doing everyone a disservice if we didn't talk about that. (36:18) I've been doing these 5 S's. (36:20) Yeah, we'll put the 5 S's in the show notes.(36:22) We have a digital asset, yeah, somewhere. (36:25) I've been watching a lot of YouTube. (36:28) I get weird.(36:29) I'm in weird, I like weird shit on YouTube. (36:32) Different IQ tests slash how well do you know English? (36:36) And I did a how well do you know English?(36:39) And oh my God, I was off to a burning start. (36:42) I literally, I got arrogant. (36:44) I got the first, there was 20.(36:47) 10 for 10. (36:48) I said to Taryn, I was like, I think I'm a fucking genius, honestly. (36:51) I think I got all the last 10 wrong.(36:53) I was like, oh, they really backloaded that. (36:55) Yeah, very humbling. (36:56) I don't know what that has to do with- They really backloaded that.(36:58) They backloaded that. (36:59) I was, I get arrogant. (37:00) I was like, I am incredibly intelligent.(37:04) There you go. (37:05) And then, no, then I was like, I'm not at all, actually. (37:09) So.(37:09) What's your main takeaway? (37:11) Don't do weird stuff on YouTube at night. (37:15) I meant for the episode.(37:16) Oh, don't do weird stuff. (37:19) No, I'm kidding. (37:22) Um, when you sign up for a goal, you are signing up for the priorities.(37:27) You're signing up to put that in front of other things that matter in a different way. (37:34) That, I had a conversation with somebody the other day, and he's like, are you going to have kids? (37:38) And I said, no kids.(37:40) He said, you just decided? (37:41) And I said, because what I believe my life is going to look like, well, would, it would not allow me to be the type of father I aspire to be. (37:47) Because the priorities of the business and the priorities of everything else are a lot.(37:52) Are, is that going to change? (37:53) Could I change? (37:54) Of course.(37:55) But I just don't think I would want my priorities to shift. (38:01) I don't know that right, wrong, or indifferent. (38:04) I don't know.(38:04) But didn't you guys say that you might adopt? (38:09) Maybe at some point, but I have to be in a certain financial position and that would have to be a conversation between you and I. (38:17) Like a lot of things would have to happen, right?(38:19) Like, Hey, um, I might need to cut out of work early every so, I don't know. (38:23) I don't, maybe we'll cross that bridge when we get there, but I don't know. (38:27) Nice.(38:28) Yeah. (38:28) I think that every goal comes with that. (38:32) Every goal.(38:33) Now that's a very, I mean, there's obviously that's a human life, right? (38:38) That's human life. (38:38) But yeah, we all have to shift our priorities to a degree in some way, shape or form.(38:44) What is your takeaway before we get out of here? (38:48) Be more careful with what you're listening to and learning and what you're, who you're learning from. (38:55) And I'll be very specific.(38:58) There are some extremely successful people, extremely successful, who sacrificed for a very long time. (39:11) And now they are successful. (39:14) And sometimes they make it seem like you don't have to.(39:17) And Kevin and I are guarding against that. (39:20) We're trying really hard. (39:22) Like, could you and I, do we have to work 60 hour weeks every week to be more successful?(39:28) No. (39:29) To be our goals. (39:31) Yes.(39:32) But we could be very quote unquote successful with 40 hours a week for the rest of our life. (39:38) If we wanted to, at this stage, I don't, but we couldn't start there.

Alan Lazaros

(39:45) No.

Kevin Palmieri

(39:46) And again, I'm going to say this because I want this to be the point that lands. (39:51) And Kevin's uncomfortable with me asking things like this, but it's important. (39:54) We've been in the podcast space for nine years.(39:58) As a podcast that has created a business, what percent do you think we are? (40:04) As a podcast business? (40:06) Correct.(40:07) Top. (40:11) 0, 0, 0, 1%. (40:15) Do you believe we could have done that working 20 hours a week?(40:20) No, I think that's dumb as shit. (40:22) Not a chance. (40:23) No.(40:24) So it becomes an if. (40:26) To your point, we in 10 years could work 20 hours a week. (40:30) Exactly.(40:31) And then tell people that's how we did it. (40:32) But yeah, no. (40:33) But that would be doing them a disservice because then they'll, they'll spin their wheels and never actually achieve the dream and the goal.(40:40) So I think Kevin and I are trying to be as candid as possible. (40:42) So if it ever seems like we're talking about us a lot, a lot of it's just examples we need to speak to that are candid and things that we've been through and talked about. (40:50) And yeah, there's, if you can't go to the gym when it's snowing, if you can't prioritize your podcast when things go wrong, if you can't find a way to do your masterclass from an RV with a generator when things go off the rails because the power went out, like you, if you can't adapt when things go wrong to get it done, you will not be successful at high levels.(41:13) You just won't. (41:15) I mean, how many, how many players have to play injured all the time? (41:19) How many fighters have to fight injured all the time?

Alan Lazaros

(41:22) Yeah.

Kevin Palmieri

(41:22) All of them.

Alan Lazaros

(41:22) All the time.

Kevin Palmieri

(41:23) Like, yeah, you can't, nothing's going to be perfect. (41:26) You have to find a way to adapt. (41:28) One of my favorite things after the, so the, you know, hockey, the Stanley cup, that's like the championship.(41:34) Yeah. (41:34) You know that my, one of my favorite things is after a team gets eliminated, they like release the injuries. (41:39) I think like five years ago, I think Patrice Bergeron was playing with like a punctured lung or something, something just, maybe it wasn't, he had broken ribs for sure.(41:50) But like, it comes out, it's like, yeah, partially torn ACL, MCL, PCL, broken rib, broken finger. (41:57) It's like, Jesus. (41:58) So, but again, hockey players, some of the toughest people on the planet.(42:03) NHL, Stanley cup. (42:04) I don't think they get enough credit. (42:07) I think, I honestly don't know if anyone at the highest level, professional sports.(42:13) I mean, well, I think basketball players are soft. (42:18) I don't know, man. (42:19) I think basketball players, I'll, I'm, I say that with my chest.(42:22) Compared to hockey players, probably, but. (42:23) I think compared, they flop, they're flopping all over the place. (42:26) Oh my goodness.(42:27) I haven't watched the NBA in a long time.

Alan Lazaros

(42:29) I see.

Kevin Palmieri

(42:29) But back in the day, it wasn't. (42:31) I mean, you ever see some of those old footage of Larry Bird getting.

Alan Lazaros

(42:34) Yeah.

Kevin Palmieri

(42:34) Back in the day.

Alan Lazaros

(42:35) Oh, brutal.

Kevin Palmieri

(42:36) Michael Jordan, triple team. (42:37) They might as well be punching him in the face. (42:39) What are you talking about?

Alan Lazaros

(42:39) Well, it ain't like that.

Kevin Palmieri

(42:40) It ain't like that anymore. (42:41) You get a strong breeze. (42:42) Somebody's going down, getting a foul.(42:45) None of that in hockey.

Alan Lazaros

(42:46) All right.

Kevin Palmieri

(42:46) They've ruined the sport. (42:47) I mean, it's, it's, yeah, it's not what it used to be. (42:49) If you are looking to really, really level up your fitness in your own unique way.(42:53) Again, you don't have to sign up for my goals. (42:55) You don't have to sign up for Alan's goals. (42:56) You can sign up for your own goals.(42:58) That is exactly what the Next Level Fitness Accountability Group is all about. (43:01) We're doing our 10 pound in 10 week challenge. (43:03) Reach out to Alan or myself on Instagram.(43:07) At a Lazarus, A-L-A-Z-R-O-S, A-L-A-Z-R-O-S. (43:13) For some reason I couldn't spell that. (43:14) 88 on Instagram or at Never Quit Kid.(43:17) And we will send you the link. (43:18) Just type in Alan Lazarus and Kevin Palmieri. (43:20) You could do that.(43:21) I think we're at the point now where that would work. (43:23) I don't know. (43:23) I haven't posted on social media in a hot minute.(43:25) So they might not even think I still exist. (43:27) You are semi-famous now.

Alan Lazaros

(43:28) Yeah.

Kevin Palmieri

(43:28) I don't know about that. (43:29) I don't know about all that, all that noise. (43:31) And then a book club every single Saturday.(43:33) What book are you doing? (43:35) Tiny Habits. (43:35) By B.J. Fogg. (43:36) By B.J. Fogg. (43:37) You've heard nothing but great positive things about the book. (43:40) So I can only imagine book club is also fire.(43:44) Small changes that change everything. (43:48) Nice. (43:49) It's a good tagline.(43:51) It is a great tagline. (43:51) As always, we love you. (43:52) We appreciate you.(43:53) Grateful for each and every one of you. (43:54) And if you are as committed, if it is a priority, as much as you say it is to get to the next level, make sure you tune in tomorrow because we will be here every single day to help you get to the next level. (44:05) Keep leveling up to reach your full potential.(44:08) Next Level Nation. (44:09) Thanks for joining us for another episode of Next Level University. (44:13) We love connecting with the Next Level family.(44:16) We mean it when we say family. (44:18) If you ever need anything, please reach out to us directly. (44:21) Everything you need to get a hold of us is in the show notes.(44:25) Thank you again and we will talk to you tomorrow.