Why Does Trying To Make It Easy Actually Make It Harder? (2473)

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In today’s episode of Next Level University, hosts Kevin Palmieri and Alan Lazaros examine why the easy road often makes life harder. Through fitness, coaching, and real performance experience, they explain why strong goals create stronger behavior, why accountability matters, and why sacrifice is part of building self-respect.

This episode is for anyone ready to stop chasing shortcuts and start becoming more consistent, disciplined, and dialed in. Listen now and take the next step toward the version of yourself your goals require.

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Show notes:
(3:24) The path of least resistance
(7:01) Why a strong reason changes behavior
(10:01) What it means to be fully dialed in
(12:02) How accountability makes the easy road harder
(14:53) Training willpower and behavior change
(19:24) Self-respect through difficult commitments
(24:07) Sacrifice, regret, and aligned goals
(29:53) Why every upside has a downside
(33:31) Set a goal big enough to stop taking the easy road
(36:24) Outro

🎙️ Hosted by Kevin Palmieri and Alan Lazaros

Next Level University is a top-ranked daily podcast for dream chasers and self-improvement lovers. With over 2,100 episodes, we help you level up in life, love, health, and wealth one day at a time. Subscribe for real, honest, no-fluff growth every single day.

Transcript

Kevin Palmieri

(0:00) One of my favorite sayings, albeit maybe a little hardcore, is if we spent as much time on growing and trying to actually find the answer to our questions as we spent on trying to find shortcuts, all of us would be way more successful. (0:14) Because all the time and energy and effort you're focusing on making life fucking easier, if you just figured out how to get better, you'd get better results. (0:22) But it's hard, it's harder.

Alan Lazaros

(0:26) If your goal is to make life easier, you will challenge yourself less, you will grow less, and then life will inevitably get harder. (0:38) Welcome to Next Level University.

Kevin Palmieri

(0:41) I'm your host, Kevin Palmieri. (0:42) And I'm your co-host, Alan Lazaros. (0:46) At NLU, we believe in a heart-driven, but no-BS approach to holistic self-improvement for dream chasers.

Alan Lazaros

(0:52) Our goal with every episode is to help you level up your life, love, health, and wealth.

Kevin Palmieri

(0:59) We bring you a new episode every single day on topics like confidence, self-belief, self-worth, self-awareness, relationships, boundaries, consistency, habits, and defining your own unique version of success.

Alan Lazaros

(1:14) Self-improvement, in your pocket, every day, from anywhere, completely free. (1:21) Welcome to Next Level University.

Kevin Palmieri

(1:27) Next Level Nation today for episode number 2473, why does trying to make it easy actually make it harder? (1:33) You and I had a conversation, this was many years ago, and you said, I have somebody in my life that I think is going to be a really good fit for this position that I'm offering. (1:45) And it was based on the fact that they are so lazy that they always try to take the easiest path and that's going to make them a good manager slash leader.(1:53) And I was like, brother, that's the dumbest shit I've heard in my entire life. (1:56) That might be the stupidest thing I've heard in my entire life. (1:59) Not my finest moment.(2:01) I understand. (2:02) I mean, we all justify, right? (2:03) Like, of course.(2:04) And did I understand this principle to the degree I understand it today? (2:07) No. (2:08) But it, it seemed, yeah, it seemed flawed.

Alan Lazaros

(2:14) Yeah it is. (2:15) He is very, very good at working smart, not hard. (2:19) Which I used to think would make him a good manager.(2:23) Yes.

Kevin Palmieri

(2:24) Do you, I have almost no context in no way to explain this, but I do believe you'll understand what I'm going to say. (2:32) I believe somebody in one of our group coaching cohorts sent us a picture of when you, when you try to take the easy route and it's like this cave situation. (2:47) Is there, can you verbalize it?(2:48) Because I don't remember it well enough to, to do it.

Alan Lazaros

(2:52) And I don't know what to search to find it. (2:54) I think you try to take the easy road and then it's just this under, you're like under this cliff that you can never get to the top of where you could have just like put in the effort to jump or climb or whatever.

Kevin Palmieri

(3:06) I was hoping for like maybe something, something a little bit more descriptive there, but I got nothing. (3:11) I did put you on the spot. (3:12) Dude, I do remember the...(3:14) I put you on the spot. (3:14) Digital asset.

Alan Lazaros

(3:16) But no, I'm not going to articulate that.

Kevin Palmieri

(3:19) All right, you do your thing and I'm going to, I'm going to see if I can find it.

Alan Lazaros

(3:22) Love it. (3:22) Love it. (3:23) All right.(3:24) So trying to take the easy road, I was listening to a productivity course this morning. (3:31) I like to keep my mind focused on important things and the speaker was talking about how our mind and body is wired to take the easy road. (3:49) And he said, from an evolutionary perspective, your brain and body and central nervous system have synced up where the way that you walk actually expends the least amount of calories possible.(4:06) Interesting. (4:07) Yeah. (4:07) I'll have to look that up in this episode over here because I don't know, I haven't researched this yet, but I do know that the path of least resistance is without a question human nature.(4:19) Absolutely. (4:20) The path of least resistance is human nature. (4:24) Now, if that's true, then all of us, in order to get better, have to override it, which is very difficult to do.(4:33) I hope that I can explain this better than I ever have. (4:36) When you're running or lifting or playing football or basketball or soccer, your subconscious mind is always saying, is this going to be worth it? (4:50) I remember doing a men's physique fitness competition prep where I had lost the show the year before I got fifth place and I was afraid to lose again.(5:06) And I remember the prep was awful. (5:10) I was posing and I was eating very low calories and I was low body fat, must be, I must have been 12%. (5:19) What do you think?(5:20) That show I won.

Kevin Palmieri

(5:22) Ah, less than that.

Alan Lazaros

(5:24) You think less than 12?

Kevin Palmieri

(5:25) Yeah, probably. (5:26) I don't know.

Kevin Palmieri

(5:27) Is 12 that lean? (5:30) I'm losing sight of it. (5:32) I don't know.(5:33) I don't even know what 12 is. (5:34) We're probably, what, 16 right now? (5:36) The thing, my app says 17.(5:38) I don't know if that, I don't know. (5:39) I don't know how accurate it is.

Alan Lazaros

(5:41) Yeah, probably 12.

Kevin Palmieri

(5:42) And you were, I'm not that lean right now.

Alan Lazaros

(5:46) You're definitely far leaner than I am. (5:48) Okay, well, that's what I think is 12. (5:52) You've never been very good at the body fat guesses.

Kevin Palmieri

(5:55) I've never, I've never cared. (5:57) For me, it's like, I don't understand why should I know? (6:00) And the other thing too is like most people, it's like, yeah, when I was bodybuilding, I was 2% body fat.(6:05) It's like, oh, you were fucking dead then? (6:06) Cool. (6:07) Good.(6:08) Welcome back. (6:09) That's quite a miracle. (6:10) Yeah.(6:11) So it just doesn't, it's never been a good measurement because nobody understands. (6:15) And if you come in and say like, I was 10% body fat, people can be like, don't you have to be like 0% to win a bodybuilding show? (6:21) It's like, yes.(6:23) Yep. (6:23) You do. (6:24) Yep.(6:24) 0% is optimal.

Alan Lazaros

(6:25) All right. (6:26) So anyways, 12% is pretty terrible. (6:30) And you're, you're very lean and it's, you're not happy person.(6:35) But anyways, so I remember thinking in my workouts, I was like, I'm working out way harder than I would without a show. (6:42) And I remember it pissed me off because it bothers me in my head. (6:46) It's like, why are you working out harder just because you have a show in two weeks?(6:50) Why can't you do that every day without a show? (6:52) And the truth of the matter is, is that it's just like the, uh, someone's trapped under a car and suddenly you can deadlift thousands of pounds.

Kevin Palmieri

(7:01) Yeah.

Alan Lazaros

(7:01) It's, it's the W-H-Y power. (7:05) Y power. (7:06) It's very important that we all have something we care about enough to not take the easy road.(7:14) Because if you take the easy road, good.

Kevin Palmieri

(7:17) I was watching Chris, Chris Bumstead won the Mr. Olympia six times, I believe. (7:22) Again? (7:24) What?(7:25) C-Bum. (7:25) C-Bum. (7:26) What do you mean again?(7:28) Oh, recently? (7:29) No, no. (7:30) Over, over the course of his career.

Alan Lazaros

(7:31) Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Kevin Palmieri

(7:32) Okay. (7:32) Yeah. (7:32) Over the course of his career.(7:33) I was just giving context. (7:34) Cause if I say Chris Bumstead, nobody's gonna know who that is. (7:36) Most likely.(7:37) Let's share the bodybuilding space and then you know exactly who that is. (7:40) Yeah. (7:40) Mr. Olympia is like the biggest bodybuilding show in the world. (7:42) Like if you win that, you're the best bodybuilder in the world. (7:44) He won it six times, I believe in a row. (7:47) Did a video.(7:48) Yeah. (7:49) In a row? (7:50) I didn't know that.(7:50) I think it was in a row. (7:51) He's something special. (7:53) That dude is something special.(7:55) He did a video on how he was, he, when he stopped competing, he stopped all of his habits. (8:01) He's still jacked obviously. (8:03) But he was like, I had to like have a conversation with myself about why was I so dialed in when I was competing for a show.(8:11) But the second the show was over, I still kept some of my habits. (8:14) I'm still, I still work out all the time and all that. (8:17) But he's like, everything like went away.(8:19) I lost the routine. (8:21) And it's very, it's a parallel is what we're talking about. (8:24) He is one of, according to this, one of the most in shape humans who has ever walked the planet.(8:33) Aesthetically speaking. (8:34) A hundred percent. (8:35) Aesthetically speaking.(8:36) Even him, who is one of the most dedicated humans in the world. (8:40) In the world. (8:41) Will do more when he has a specific goal.

Alan Lazaros

(8:43) A hundred percent. (8:44) So that, I think that's a good example. (8:45) One of my favorite examples from that productivity course is he says, Michael Jordan is lazy and he shows a big picture on the slide of Michael Jordan in his prime, Chicago Bulls, the last championship.(9:01) He's like, how can I call this guy lazy? (9:04) Championship one. (9:06) Fifth ring.(9:08) Fifth championship one. (9:11) Trophy in hand. (9:13) Says to his trainer, I'll see you at 5 a.m. tomorrow morning. (9:16) How can I call him lazy? (9:18) Because look at him now. (9:19) And he shows a picture of him now.(9:21) With a cigar in his mouth and a big gut. (9:24) The reality is, and I've tried to explain this. (9:27) You were listening to our show, 200 and something episodes, 206 or something.(9:32) Something like that. (9:34) I used to try to say this. (9:36) You will only be as dialed in as your goals require you to be.(9:40) No one is like, oh, I really want to be the most dialed in human being on earth. (9:49) I've kind of said that, but hold on. (9:53) The reason why is because you want something.(9:55) You're not looking. (9:56) Being dialed in is not the goal. (9:58) The goal is the byproduct of being dialed in.(10:01) And I say this to all my clients. (10:03) They said, why did you switch back to peak performance coaching? (10:05) I said, because ultimately your success is going to be a byproduct of you being more dialed in than you ever have.(10:12) So I say true, false, semi-true. (10:13) I, insert name here, am the most dialed in I've ever been holistically. (10:20) And if they say true, great.(10:23) Take care. (10:24) I'm joking. (10:25) No, it's great.(10:27) That means I'm doing my job. (10:30) If you can't say true to that, I'm not doing my job. (10:34) I, Kevin Palmieri, am the most holistically dialed in I've ever been.(10:39) True. (10:40) Okay. (10:41) That means I'm doing my job as a leader, I think.(10:45) That's my, again, my thing. (10:47) Everyone should have their own, obviously. (10:49) That's what peak performance coaching is to me.(10:50) My point though is being dialed in is not the goal. (10:54) No one comes to me and says, Alan, can you please make me the most dialed in? (10:57) No.(10:57) I mean, yes, I will. (10:58) But that's not, no one comes to me for that. (11:00) Hey, Alan, I'm hiring you as a coach because I really want you to help me dial in.(11:05) No, they say, hey, can you help me grow my business? (11:07) Hey, can I lose 20 pounds? (11:08) Hey, can I, I want to attract my dream partner.(11:12) Or, hey, my partner and I are struggling. (11:15) We might get divorced. (11:16) I don't want that.(11:17) Like, nobody comes and says, hey, I want to be more dialed in. (11:20) Nobody comes and says, hey, I want my life to be harder.

Kevin Palmieri

(11:22) Has anybody come to you and said, I want to be more dialed in?

Alan Lazaros

(11:26) Yeah, but only after knowing me for many years. (11:28) Okay. (11:29) Yeah, never out of the gate.(11:31) No, of course not. (11:32) But after many years they have, I do have one client who says they want to be the most dialed in. (11:36) But that's also because they've been around me long enough to know that that's actually, everything you want is on the other side of that.

Kevin Palmieri

(11:41) Yeah.

Alan Lazaros

(11:43) Now, if, I want to caveat that. (11:50) Everything you want is on the other side of being more dialed in. (11:53) Dialed in doesn't necessarily mean just finances or just fitness.(11:58) It could be your relationship too. (12:00) Right? (12:00) And so, it all depends on the goal.(12:02) But the easy road is much less attractive when you have a fitness show coming up and you're going to get laughed off stage. (12:11) The easy road is much less attractive when you have a bunch of peers who are crushing it. (12:17) The easy road is much less attractive when you're doing a 10 pound in 10 week challenge starting July 1st, if you want in, there's 19 people signed up.(12:24) And you're leading it. (12:26) Taking the easy road is not going to happen tonight when I have to run my 108th mile 108 days in a row because I have accountability with this community. (12:37) You have to put yourself in a situation where the easy road is harder.

Kevin Palmieri

(12:44) Why do you like making it hard? (12:47) There was a time, and again, this is funny, but I think it also speaks to the way you are wired. (12:52) There was, me, you, and somebody else were hanging out.(12:56) And you said something. (12:58) It was like, yeah, I've been up since 4 o'clock. (13:01) I've still got to fucking hit the gym later or something.(13:04) And after you left, the person who looked at me was like, he makes his life so much harder. (13:10) And then he tells us about how hard it is. (13:12) But he's the one who made it hard in the first place.(13:14) And the example I've used with you is like, you shoot yourself in the foot and then you talk about how bad it hurts while you're sewing it up. (13:21) But I know why you're doing it. (13:24) Did you always?(13:27) No. (13:28) Because back then it didn't make any sense, right? (13:32) Why did you decide to run a mile every day?(13:34) Forever? (13:36) What was the... (13:38) Because you never share the layer of layer of layer.(13:42) Because you didn't just wake up one day and say, okay, I'm going to do that. (13:44) There was obviously a ton of intentionality.

Alan Lazaros

(13:47) I thought about it for a long time. (13:48) Why? (13:49) I actually thought about it since Brandon started doing it.(13:52) So Brandon started doing this 1,400 days ago or something like that. (13:57) And he stopped running a mile every day after 1,000, 1,200 or something. (14:01) But now he still exercises every day.(14:03) He still has the streak. (14:04) He just isn't doing this miles for miles thing anymore. (14:07) But anyways, so what are the layers?(14:12) Okay. (14:13) It starts with I was jealous. (14:16) And it's like, why?(14:18) So I felt envy. (14:19) And I was like, I'm never envious. (14:21) What the fuck is this?(14:23) Why would I be envious? (14:25) And then it was, okay, that's really cool. (14:28) That's cool.(14:28) Okay, then let's go through it. (14:33) I can give you why I do it now. (14:35) I don't know if I know how to give you the layers of why I was jealous.(14:41) Or envious. (14:42) Whatever. (14:44) Okay.(14:46) I'm going to give you why I do it now. (14:47) Then I'll give you all the byproducts. (14:48) Hopefully that'll answer the question.(14:49) I love the question. (14:53) The reason I do it is the dorsolateral prefrontal cortex. (14:59) That's number one.(15:00) There's more than one reason. (15:05) The dorsolateral prefrontal cortex is known as the willpower muscle in your brain. (15:10) And they've done studies on brains that were donated to science.(15:15) Where Olympic athletes had a larger dorsolateral prefrontal cortex. (15:20) And what that means is that doing hard things that hurt by choice for a greater end state strengthens your brain. (15:30) The executive function of your brain is better.(15:34) And the thinking underneath that is, why does having a better brain matter? (15:42) What is the difference between Kevin and I? (15:44) If you really think about it.(15:47) Brain. (15:48) Right. (15:49) And I always say, you can chop off my arm, I'm still Alan.(15:52) You can't chop off my head. (15:54) I'm not Alan anymore. (15:56) Okay.(15:57) You can chop off my arm and I'm still Alan Lazarus. (16:00) Alright. (16:00) So the brain is the thing we can't see.(16:03) But it's the most important. (16:05) What separates Claude from Grok from Chat GPT, all these AIs? (16:12) Right.(16:13) We can see each other's bodies. (16:15) We can see each other's faces. (16:16) We can see who's better looking.(16:17) We can see who's taller. (16:18) We can see and all that, whatever. (16:19) But you can't see minds.(16:21) You can't see brains. (16:22) And I don't even want to say minds because mind is like kind of more esoteric. (16:26) Brain.(16:30) Your brain, I think, is the competitive advantage. (16:32) Your dorsolateral prefrontal cortex is the competitive advantage. (16:35) Why do I run a mile a day?(16:37) Because I know the number one competitive advantage in having a successful life that's deeply meaningful is not knowledge. (16:46) It's behavior change. (16:50) I might not be a lot of things, but no one on this planet will be better than me at behavior change.(16:58) No one. (17:00) Now, I'm actually not concerned about changing my own behavior. (17:03) I'm fairly good at that.(17:04) Changing other people's behavior is ridiculously difficult. (17:07) And I want to be the best in the world at that to the point where I actually went to your wife and I said, What are all the books that I need to study? (17:13) Because she's a behavioral analyst.(17:15) And I want to learn everything I can to help people change their behavior. (17:19) Because most of us are stuck in life because we are incapable of changing our own behavior. (17:25) And me doing a mile every single day is helping me grow the one part of my brain that guarantees I'm better than everyone else at changing my own behavior.(17:35) And I don't mean better than everyone else. (17:36) That makes it sound bad. (17:37) I don't care.(17:38) I want you all to be good at it. (17:39) I mean the best I can be at being a father, being a future husband, being a business partner, being a leader. (17:49) Leading by example is my number one core value.(17:51) And if I can change my behavior, I can always lead by example and never be full of shit. (17:58) So in your mind, making it harder actually makes it easier eventually. (18:01) Yes.(18:02) And it does. (18:03) I can run a mile a day very easily right now. (18:06) In the beginning it was harder.(18:08) Why?

Kevin Palmieri

(18:11) That's the thing is like usually I say, okay, sell it. (18:13) Like sell it.

Alan Lazaros

(18:15) Well, you sell it. (18:17) I don't know if I can. (18:18) I can sell it.(18:20) Your sex life will be better. (18:22) Your cardiovascular health will be better. (18:23) Your VO2 max will be better.(18:25) You'll feel like a million bucks. (18:26) You'll look better. (18:28) My skin looks better.(18:29) Everything looks better. (18:30) I'm just a healthier person. (18:32) You sleep better.(18:34) Your knees are not better. (18:35) I'm joking. (18:35) I'm working on it.(18:36) But like everything is pretty much better. (18:40) Like there's very little downside except for my knees have been hurting me a little bit.

Kevin Palmieri

(18:45) You're obviously going to invest time into it, but that's not a bad thing. (18:49) I'm excited to do the 10 pound and 10 week challenge. (18:52) And it's not because, I mean, I'm excited to get shredded.(18:55) I am. (18:56) I am not vain in that, but like I like being lean.

Alan Lazaros

(19:01) Yeah, it feels good. (19:02) I like being lean. (19:02) It's been nice.(19:04) I'm not super lean, but I'm lean enough now to where it being a hot day, me having my shirt off is nice. (19:10) Yeah, it's nice. (19:10) I don't have to be insecure.(19:12) Having a gut is the fucking worst. (19:15) I'm not a fan. (19:16) I hate it.

Kevin Palmieri

(19:16) I hate it so much. (19:17) I'm not a fan. (19:18) I'm not a fan.(19:19) And like, I want to be jacked and I want to be ripped. (19:22) Good for you. (19:22) Let me live my life.(19:24) But more than that, dude, last time we did the 10 pound and 10 week challenge, I had some of the worst workouts I've had in a long time, but they were like kind of awesome. (19:34) I was like, fuck, this is great. (19:35) I'm tired and I'm hungry and I'm weak as shit.(19:38) And there is nowhere I, I would rather be anywhere else than at the gym right now. (19:45) But there's something about. (19:47) Self-respect, baby.(19:48) Self-respect and like proving to yourself and that, that feeling you get after. (19:54) It's like, okay, I did that. (19:56) I'm excited for that.(19:57) I don't, I don't enjoy, like right now I'm eating whatever I want. (20:02) I don't enjoy that. (20:03) Nice.(20:03) I do in the moment. (20:05) Yeah, of course. (20:06) Yeah, I do in the moment for sure.(20:08) Yeah, same. (20:09) Nutella makes ice cream. (20:11) Do they seriously?(20:12) Oh my God, Alan. (20:14) I told Tara, I said, this is a fucking problem. (20:17) I said, this is, this is the best thing bar none, not close.(20:20) I've never had anything nearly as good as this. (20:22) This is the best thing I've had in my entire life. (20:24) Oh my God.(20:25) I will risk it all for this Nutella ice cream. (20:28) But I was like, I'm super excited for the 10 pound and 10 week challenge because now I have a reason not to. (20:32) Not that I don't.(20:34) Yeah. (20:34) This is the thing. (20:35) I know it's not good.(20:36) I know it's loaded with sugar. (20:38) I know it's not good. (20:39) The problem is it's not bad enough now.(20:42) Yep. (20:43) But when I have to weigh in tomorrow, it is, it's immediately bad enough. (20:48) And I think there's, there's something, there's something important about that.

Alan Lazaros

(20:51) Let's go into that and we'll get out of here shortly. (20:53) But for everyone out there watching or listening, what does NLU actually solve? (20:58) It helps you be consistent towards your goals.(21:01) For sure. (21:03) And why are you inconsistent? (21:06) Because you don't have a big enough reason to be consistent.(21:11) If, if someone is waiting for you in the gym tomorrow and they're going to be furious with you, someone you care deeply for, if you don't show up because you said you'd be there, you're gonna go. (21:28) For sure. (21:28) You're just gonna go.(21:30) If no one gives a shit and it's 7.30am and it's cold outside and you're not feeling it, you're just not gonna go. (21:42) People think that you set goals to get the goal. (21:44) And you and I have talked about that.(21:45) I know you want the goal. (21:47) One of the best things about setting a goal is now you have a big enough reason to be better. (21:55) Nobody gets better just to get better.(21:57) Like you can eventually get there. (21:59) You can. (21:59) You can get the consistent, persistent pursuit of your potential.(22:02) We had a mentor who said that. (22:03) I love it. (22:04) I want to reach my full potential.(22:06) Here's the truth. (22:07) I don't reach my full potential when I don't have a big enough reason to do it. (22:11) So you have to set goals that lead to dreams in alignment with your potential.(22:17) And reaching your full potential is something that is tremendously meaningful. (22:25) Nobody wants to look in the mirror and regret letting themselves go. (22:29) Nobody wants to let all values degrade over time if you don't pour into them.(22:38) Like NLU would die if we stopped pouring. (22:42) So we have to set goals. (22:43) Every client, 38 clients, we all have quarterly goals that lead to an annual goal.(22:48) And if you take those away, you take away the peak performance tracking, you take away the consistency. (22:54) That's why people like the challenge. (22:56) Because people, I think, do want a challenge.(22:58) Nobody wants to wake up and be fucking bored. (23:01) We want to be better. (23:04) I think we do.(23:05) We want to be better. (23:06) We want to be better. (23:06) We don't want to sacrifice everything we value every day.(23:11) I understand that. (23:12) Some people more than others. (23:13) We talked about Michael Phelps.(23:14) Did you end up watching any of that? (23:15) I sent you the... (23:16) I haven't.

Kevin Palmieri

(23:16) No, I haven't yet.

Alan Lazaros

(23:17) But thank you. (23:17) Of course, man. (23:18) I'm going to listen to that on my run.(23:22) And Michael Phelps is pretty hardcore in that, which I'm grateful for. (23:25) Because I think when he first sort of started speaking in the speaking circuit, I've watched most of his speeches, if not all of them. (23:32) And he was a little bit like, yeah, I was a kid with a dream.(23:36) And, you know, I just, you know, I was just a kid with a dream. (23:39) I'm not going to say I was the best. (23:40) It's like, dude, come on, man.(23:43) Yeah. (23:43) It's like when Tom Brady, he's like, I never once said I was the greatest of all time or wanted to be the greatest of all time. (23:48) It's like, seriously?(23:49) You seriously didn't decide in advance to be the best football player on earth? (23:54) Or at least best quarterback? (23:55) Like, of course you did, right?(23:56) Now, I get it. (23:58) You focused on your potential each day and getting a little better each day. (24:01) But there was some fucking goals and there was some dedication and some sacrifices that you made along the way.(24:07) And I think that we feel good about ourselves when we sacrifice to get to the next level. (24:13) But we don't feel good about ourselves when we sacrifice things that we regret. (24:16) So you got to be careful with that.(24:18) But at the end of the day, you're more likely to regret not achieving your goals and dreams. (24:25) I would rather you overswing and regret it than underswing. (24:29) For sure.(24:30) Oh, that's a fucking hard one.

Kevin Palmieri

(24:32) I don't know.

Kevin Palmieri

(24:33) I think it depends on the person.

Kevin Palmieri

(24:35) Depends on what you value. (24:37) Depends on what you value. (24:38) Because I think one of the things we get, like we're seeing so often is the people who regret it try to tell other people not to do it.(24:43) But it's like, well, you just value things differently. (24:46) You know, like if you value family time…

Alan Lazaros

(24:49) Have you ever hit a goal and regretted it?

Kevin Palmieri

(24:52) Yes.

Alan Lazaros

(24:53) Yeah. (24:54) It's just a bad goal. (24:55) Of all…(24:56) agreed. (24:56) Same. (24:57) Yeah, it was a bad goal.(24:58) Have you ever hit a goal that was aligned and regretted it? (25:01) Obviously not. (25:02) That's a dumb question.(25:04) Give me… (25:04) Okay, let's say you've set 100 goals in your life. (25:06) Clear, measurable targets.(25:07) 100 goals. (25:08) What percentage of those 100 out of 100 did you regret?

Kevin Palmieri

(25:13) Small, but very memorable. (25:17) A very small percentage. (25:19) But like, I regret my bodybuilding show.(25:22) I won. (25:23) I regret the way I did it. (25:25) So it's not necessarily…(25:25) I guess it's the naivete that came with setting the goal.

Alan Lazaros

(25:29) Yeah, so you regret being naive. (25:30) You don't regret the goal. (25:32) But…(25:33) How else are you going to get rid of naivete, by the way? (25:35) I don't fucking know. (25:37) Massive pain, unfortunately.(25:38) Well, dude, that adds a byproduct of goals.

Kevin Palmieri

(25:41) I regret… (25:42) I don't actually regret it. (25:43) I'm weird with regret.(25:44) We've talked about that. (25:45) I don't really regret it. (25:47) But if you said, would you have rather undershot?(25:51) Nah, I would have rather overshot. (25:52) Nice. (25:53) But also, look, I wanted to kill myself at one point.(25:56) So I'm not saying that's good for you. (25:59) Okay. (25:59) I overshot…(26:00) Like, Alan said he was 12%. (26:03) There's no way I was not single-digit. (26:05) You were single-digit, for sure.(26:06) This was bad. (26:08) Weren't you 144 or something? (26:11) I think I was 149.

Alan Lazaros

(26:13) 149, yeah.

Kevin Palmieri

(26:14) I had a full six-pack. (26:16) I don't really have… (26:17) I don't think I have a six-pack, the way my abs are actually built.(26:20) My abs are not very aesthetic, unfortunately. (26:22) I was not blessed with that. (26:24) Luckily, I have the 6'2 height that I have.(26:27) So, you know, I was given something instead. (26:29) When I started my bodybuilding prep, I already had a six-pack. (26:32) I was already ripped.(26:34) I shouldn't have done it the way I did it. (26:37) And my coach was like, if you want to win, you have to be… (26:39) Like, right now, they want lean.(26:40) You took it literally. (26:41) You took it literal. (26:43) I take everything literally.(26:44) Brother, we had a conversation right before. (26:45) You're like, you're that literal? (26:46) Yeah, just tell me what to do, and I'll do it.(26:48) Yeah, that's pretty much it. (26:48) What did he say to you, specifically? (26:50) If you want to win the show, you're going to suffer more than everyone else?(26:52) That, and they care about lean. (26:55) So come in leaner than everybody else, and you'll win. (26:57) It's like, alright, let's do it.(26:59) Let's do that. (26:59) Did you do that? (27:02) To a degree.(27:03) I mean, the problem was, I competed against some monsters, too. (27:06) So that was…

Alan Lazaros

(27:07) But were you leaner than everyone else?

Kevin Palmieri

(27:09) I think so. (27:11) But to a detriment. (27:12) I didn't hold my muscle mass.(27:13) Yeah, you lost a lot of muscle mass, yeah. (27:15) So much. (27:16) I was already too lean.(27:17) I shouldn't have… (27:18) Did he tell you? (27:21) No.(27:25) No. (27:27) Why not? (27:30) I don't know.

Alan Lazaros

(27:31) I think maybe he miscalculated, too. (27:33) My favorite part of bodybuilding, a little nostalgia here, my favorite part of winning that show was how good you look for the next three months. (27:41) Oh my God.(27:43) Because now you're eating, and in the gym you're just… (27:47) You're still lean, but you're not depleted. (27:50) The week after when you feel like a goddamn superhero.

Kevin Palmieri

(27:54) And you still have your tan on you. (27:56) I don't know. (27:57) I would do it again at some point if we weren't doing this.(28:00) I realize how detrimental it would be. (28:02) Like, I feel like I could handle it mental health-wise now. (28:04) I do.(28:05) I was in a bad place just in general at that point. (28:08) Yeah.

Alan Lazaros

(28:08) It would be hard for me to do it, though, knowing everyone's not natural.

Alan Lazaros

(28:13) That's fair, but… (28:15) At least before I thought some people might be.

Kevin Palmieri

(28:18) I mean, that was drug tested, right? (28:20) And you can get around that, but…

Alan Lazaros

(28:21) Yeah, of course you can. (28:23) You just can't, you know, within a month of the show, right?

Kevin Palmieri

(28:28) That's the point of this. (28:30) I saw… (28:30) Last thing, I won't get out of here.(28:31) I saw… (28:31) And again, this is a weird fucking parallel, but it was like, oh, you think squats are bad. (28:36) Well, when you fall and break your hip when you're 75, like, that's worse.(28:41) When you think working long hours is bad, when you can't pay your rent, right? (28:45) It is the… (28:47) I've never said this word on the podcast, juxtaposition.(28:50) I don't know why I'm even saying that. (28:51) I have no idea where that came from. (28:53) It is the juxtaposition of those two things.(28:56) First of all, first of all, the fuck does that mean, man? (28:59) It means when you're comparing… (29:01) Hold on.(29:02) The relationship between two things that you're comparing, essentially. (29:06) I think it's like the polarity of the things.

Alan Lazaros

(29:09) Let's get a real definition. (29:10) I'm on it, I'm on it. (29:11) Juxtaposition means placing two things side by side so that their differences or sometimes similarities become more noticeable.(29:19) Yeah, there you go. (29:20) Polarity. (29:20) The billionaire walked past the homeless man.(29:23) The contrast between wealth and poverty is a juxtaposition. (29:27) Yeah, oh, I think it's just contrast in motion. (29:32) Juxtaposition is the act of putting things next to each other to emphasize their contrast or comparison.(29:36) Okay. (29:37) So, work hard now or be broke later, essentially, is what the… (29:42) Pros and cons, we don't talk about enough.(29:46) You cannot… (29:47) Listen. (29:50) End of episode, right after this.(29:53) What does naïve mean? (29:55) Naïve means you think you can have the upside without the downside. (29:59) Boom.(30:01) Naïve equals someone who believes that they can have the upside without the downside. (30:08) It's the dumbest shit ever. (30:10) And it does not exist.(30:12) It doesn't exist. (30:14) Everything you want that's great, everything that you want that's great comes with the downside. (30:19) Everything.(30:20) And the moment you accept that, you can start actually achieving your dreams. (30:26) I talked to you about this yesterday. (30:30) I said, dude, my relationship with sacrifice is so positive.(30:35) Very high. (30:36) Thank you. (30:37) I just don't get at all why people are like, well, I want to lose 10 pounds in 10 weeks, but I also want to enjoy myself.(30:44) It's like those two don't even really go together. (30:47) Like, I'm not saying you have to hate every second. (30:51) Don't go to the extreme with this.(30:52) But you're not going to like… (30:54) It's not going to be like an awesome summer. (30:57) You're going to have to fucking suffer.(30:59) Well, you're going to sacrifice. (31:00) You have to sacrifice. (31:01) You have to.(31:03) I just will never fully understand that. (31:06) And I do think part of that is because maybe I understand the reverse engineer. (31:12) I know what it's going to take.(31:14) So I'm not like… (31:15) Can you imagine 10 pounds in 10 weeks and then 5 pounds in? (31:19) Like, wow.(31:20) I didn't realize that I was going to have to like eat less. (31:24) Well, if it's your first time. (31:26) Exactly.(31:27) And if it's your first time, you're naive. (31:29) And you're going to learn that through what? (31:31) Setting the goal.(31:32) So I actually think…

Kevin Palmieri

(31:32) I didn't want to do it. (31:33) Like, you and I went back and forth. (31:36) And I was like, dude, I don't want to do it.(31:37) You know why? (31:38) Because I know how fucking hard it's going to be at this point for me.

Kevin Palmieri

(31:40) Yeah.

Kevin Palmieri

(31:41) I've been dieting for four months or whatever.

Kevin Palmieri

(31:44) What did you have?

Kevin Palmieri

(31:46) I mean, I've taken my foot off the gas, but probably like 175. (31:49) So I'm going to be down at like 165 probably. (31:51) It's going to be bad.(31:51) It's going to be really shitty. (31:53) It's going to be terrible. (31:53) I'm excited.(31:55) I'm excited about…

Alan Lazaros

(31:56) I'm going to be 190, so I should be okay.

Kevin Palmieri

(31:58) Yeah, you're going to be totally fine. (31:59) Yeah, I'll be fine. (32:00) I didn't stop.(32:00) I'll still be up in the 17% body fat probably. (32:03) I didn't stop after the last one. (32:05) I didn't go as hard, but I didn't stop.(32:08) I kept… (32:09) I want to… (32:10) You need a muscle building phase after this for sure.(32:12) I'm done. (32:12) I'm done. (32:13) I'm done letting it go.(32:15) Like, I don't… (32:16) I like being lean. (32:19) I like being lean.(32:20) Love it. (32:21) And it gives me something to shoot for. (32:24) Like, muscle building phase is great, but like, what am I shooting for?(32:26) I want to squat for… (32:28) I'm going to do that, but it's not going to be… (32:31) Last thing before we go.(32:33) 1020 right now at night. (32:35) Guy at my gym, Seth, great dude. (32:38) Grinds.(32:38) Nicest dude in the world. (32:41) And he's getting to the edge. (32:43) He's getting to the end of a long diet phase.(32:46) And I said, isn't it fucked up how the bulk is harder than the diet? (32:49) For like, me and you. (32:51) Like, us, when we like being lean.(32:53) Is he shorter? (32:54) Yeah. (32:55) He's older too.(32:57) Mid 40s, coming up on 50. (32:59) Like, it's not like it used to be. (33:00) Yeah.(33:01) He said, what do you mean? (33:02) And I said, you have to be more dialed in on your bulk than you do your cut. (33:07) Because if you go too far, you're going to be extremely disheartened and you're going to feel like you did all this for nothing.(33:12) You have to be more disciplined in the bulk than you do the diet. (33:15) How fucked up is that?

Kevin Palmieri

(33:16) Yeah.

Kevin Palmieri

(33:17) And he's like, yeah man, it sucks, doesn't it?

Alan Lazaros

(33:18) Well, pros and cons, right? (33:20) It depends. (33:20) If you're tall and lanky, you want to bulk.(33:23) If you're short and stout, you want to be lean. (33:26) Short and stout, like a teapot. (33:28) You know it.(33:31) Everybody, I already said end of episode, so I have to say it again. (33:34) If you're out there watching or listening, set a goal big enough that you care enough about to where the downside becomes worth it and you stop taking the easy road. (33:44) There's easy roads everywhere.(33:46) Instagram, Facebook, LinkedIn, TikTok, Snapchat, Internet, all devices imaginable. (33:53) There's easy roads everywhere. (33:55) Make a goal big enough to not, when I was trying to quit drinking, I had a cheat code.(34:00) I'm going to fucking become a fitness model. (34:04) What's the worst thing for fitness? (34:06) One of the worst things for fitness is drinking alcohol.(34:08) So I replaced alcohol with a fitness goal. (34:11) And it was way easier not to drink when I cared 10 out of 10 about fitness. (34:15) If I care 10 out of 10 about my fitness goal, I'm not going to have the temptation to drink as much.(34:21) And yes, set a goal that's going to make taking the easy road much harder.

Kevin Palmieri

(34:26) All right, if one of the things you're focused on is fitness, we've been talking about it, obviously, Next Level Fitness Accountability Group, but every time we talk about it, a bunch of people reach out. (34:34) That's why we keep saying it, because I think this, to Alan's point, this is a group where you know people are going to be consistent and that will help you. (34:42) I will be in there every day.(34:43) I've been in there every day this year. (34:45) Alan has been in there every day this year. (34:47) This is something that we're in every day, and there's a bunch of people doing amazing stuff in there.(34:51) So if you're out there and you want to really dial it in this summer, July 1st, 10 pounds in 10 weeks, I think there's 20 people now. (35:00) Somebody else joined when we were on group coaching. (35:02) I don't know if you've seen it yet.(35:03) But all you do is you reach out to Alan and or myself, and or you can put it in the group at some point, but we'll start.

Alan Lazaros

(35:11) There's a start weight, there's a goal weight, and there's an end date. (35:15) And an end weight. (35:16) So there's three columns.(35:18) Four, your name, full name. (35:20) And then there's the start weight, July 1st. (35:22) And then there's your goal weight, which can be 10 pounds, 5 pounds.(35:26) You can gain or lose. (35:27) It's up to you. (35:28) We recommend 10, but if you want to do 5, that's fine.(35:32) And the end weight will be September 8th. (35:34) And weigh-ins are due midnight, September 8th. (35:39) And I have a list.(35:40) I have a little Excel spreadsheet. (35:42) And we have a fitness accountability group, and it's totally free.

Kevin Palmieri

(35:46) I'm going to be flying back. (35:47) I just realized this. (35:48) I'm flying back from Missouri on the 1st, I think.

Alan Lazaros

(35:53) Nice.

Kevin Palmieri

(35:53) So I'm going to probably get my weigh-in at like 11, maybe like right before midnight. (35:59) Perfect. (36:00) I could try to bring my scale.(36:02) Bring it? (36:02) See if I can fit it. (36:03) See if I can fit it.(36:04) I got to bring my camera equipment. (36:06) It's a whole freaking thing. (36:06) You got it?(36:07) All right, cool. (36:08) And if you're looking to set bigger goals, if you're looking to get extra accountability, reach out to Alan for coaching. (36:14) Again, having a coach is one of the best ways in the world to get extra accountability.(36:18) That's what the fitness group is, except it's free. (36:20) Alan's is paid, obviously, but a great opportunity for you if you're out there trying to get to the next level. (36:24) Okay.(36:25) As always, we love you. (36:26) We appreciate you. (36:26) Grateful for each and every one of you.(36:27) If you are as committed as you say you are to getting to the next level, make sure you tune in tomorrow because we will be here every single day to help you get there.

Alan Lazaros

(36:34) Keep leveling up to reach your full potential. (36:36) Next Level Nation.

Kevin Palmieri

(36:38) Thanks for joining us for another episode of Next Level University. (36:42) We love connecting with the Next Level family.

Alan Lazaros

(36:45) We mean it when we say family. (36:47) If you ever need anything, please reach out to us directly. (36:50) Everything you need to get a hold of us is in the show notes.(36:54) Thank you again, and we will talk to you tomorrow.