The Goal Is The Boss (2493)

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What if your goal has not changed your life because you have not let it?

In this episode, Kevin and Alan explain why meaningful goals must become a standard for your decisions, habits, and priorities. Drawing from nearly a decade of building Next Level University, their own fitness and business commitments, and patterns they see with coaching clients, they address the hidden tradeoffs behind lasting progress. They discuss why most success stories leave out the long timeline, discomfort, and discipline involved, and why naïveté can keep people focused on the outcome instead of the work. This episode is a direct reminder that real growth requires honest self-awareness, consistent action, and the willingness to let your goals lead.

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Show notes:
(2:30) Why your goal must lead your life
(8:15) The real cost of meaningful goals
(13:48) Naïveté and the hidden tradeoffs of success
(19:44) Why long-term consistency matters
(25:24) Cutting short-term choices for long-term results
(32:23) Building a life through daily discipline
(35:26) Aligning your habits with your goals
(37:01) Outro

🎙️ Hosted by Kevin Palmieri and Alan Lazaros

Next Level University is a top-ranked daily podcast for dream chasers and self-improvement lovers. With over 2,100 episodes, we help you level up in life, love, health, and wealth one day at a time. Subscribe for real, honest, no-fluff growth every single day.

Transcript

Kevin Palmieri

(0:00) Maybe the reason you do not have the goal accomplished yet is because you have not actually allowed it to influence your life the way it has to. (0:13) That is the point of the goal. (0:14) The goal literally is a red light and a green light.(0:17) Red light to do things that are not aligned, green light to do things that are, and if you do them correctly, you will get the goal. (0:23) If you don't, you're not going to get the goal.

Alan Lazaros

(0:26) The higher you set a goal, the clearer you set a goal, the more you focus on a goal. (0:33) It makes your present much more dialed in immediately. (0:37) Welcome to Next Level University.(0:40) I'm your host, Kevin Palmieri.

Kevin Palmieri

(0:42) And I'm your co-host, Alan Lazaros. (0:45) At NLU, we believe in a heart-driven but no BS approach to holistic self-improvement for dream chasers.

Alan Lazaros

(0:51) Our goal with every episode is to help you level up your life, love, health, and wealth.

Kevin Palmieri

(0:58) We bring you a new episode every single day on topics like confidence, self-belief, self-worth, self-awareness, relationships, boundaries, consistency, habits, and defining your own unique version of success.

Alan Lazaros

(1:14) Self-improvement in your pocket, every day, from anywhere, completely free. (1:20) Welcome to Next Level University.

Kevin Palmieri

(1:26) Next Level Nation today for episode number 2493, The Goal is the Boss. (1:34) You gave us a quote by Michael Burt. (1:38) What is his definition of long obedience in one direction?(1:43) I think that's one of the best representations of goal achievement I've ever heard. (1:48) Same. (1:49) It pains me to say that I didn't come up with it, but that is really accurate.(1:55) Because, okay, we talked about this before. (1:57) Obedience, what does obedience mean? (1:59) It means appropriate behavior.(2:07) Yeah. (2:08) Right? (2:08) When you send a dog to obedience training, you're saying like, this is appropriate behavior.(2:12) If you want to, I want to make sure you don't pee in the house, this is appropriate behavior. (2:14) This is, I don't want you to jump on people, whatever it is. (2:16) I don't have dogs, I have cats, ultimate cat dad right here.(2:19) Not Alan, me. (2:20) Don't let him tell you otherwise. (2:22) All right, why do you want to do this episode?(2:23) I'm wasting people's time here.

Alan Lazaros

(2:25) Well, I'm talking from the frame. (2:33) Here we go. (2:34) It's a great start.(2:35) I'm trying to talk from the frame of being the least full of shit humanly possible. (2:39) And that has changed the way that I talk, the way that I think a little bit. (2:43) And again, I don't think I was full of it before.(2:44) I just want to get better. (2:46) So I can't say anything that I don't believe is fully accurate. (2:50) That's my new direction I'm headed.(2:52) So letting you guys in. (2:53) All right. (2:53) So my point is, I'm it's bullshit.(3:00) However, while listening to said book, it's called time as a tool. (3:05) Don't read it. (3:06) It's garbage.(3:07) It's called time as a tool, which I agree with the title and the concept. (3:13) There's one really powerful concept that I've already gotten from it, which isn't new, but I liked the way that the author put it. (3:20) And he said that instead of I'm doing X to achieve a goal, I'm doing X for the goal.(3:28) And I think that that's the same as the obedience piece. (3:33) Nobody wants to be a servant. (3:34) Nobody wants to be obedient.(3:36) There's this sort of rebel culture in the world. (3:39) I don't know when this started, but it was kind of like screw the man quote unquote, I'm going to do me. (3:46) And that really started to happen a ton in the nineties, you know, Eminem rapping, like the whole thing, nothing against Eminem.(3:52) He's just happens to be one that I listened to when I was younger. (3:55) The point that I'm making though, is you may not want a boss. (3:59) As a matter of fact, in the 21st century with millennials, millennials are the largest generation to enter the workforce in all of human history by far.(4:09) Actually, there's so many of us.

Kevin Palmieri

(4:11) It's wild.

Alan Lazaros

(4:12) It's crazy. (4:13) And the point that I'm making with this, most of you are millennials listening because Kevin and I are millennials and the majority of the planet is millennials. (4:20) If you look at the different generations, you've got builders and boomers and gen X, then you have millennials and then you have gen Z.(4:26) And then you have, what's the youngest one?

Kevin Palmieri

(4:28) You act like I know any of these men.

Alan Lazaros

(4:30) Okay. (4:30) Fair. (4:31) Anyways.(4:31) My point of this is that nobody wants to use the word boss in the 21st century leader. (4:40) We like leader. (4:40) We don't like boss and manager millennials in particular.(4:44) Like, no, I'm going to do me. (4:46) I'm going to do me. (4:47) I don't have a boss.(4:48) I have, I have a leader. (4:49) I'm a leader. (4:50) I lead leaders.(4:51) Right. (4:51) So, but here's the thing. (4:54) Screw all that.(4:55) When it comes to your goals, let your goals be your boss. (4:57) Love it.

Kevin Palmieri

(5:00) That was a nice wrap up. (5:02) Not bad, right? (5:03) That was a nice wrap up.(5:04) We're doing the 10 pound and 10 week challenge again. (5:07) We, I am not immune to the goal and or the community and or the necessity making me way more consistent. (5:14) I'm I'm that's why we do it.(5:16) How did the 10 pound and 10 week challenge happen? (5:19) We were like, Hey, we need more accountability. (5:22) And if we need it, I'm sure there are other people I'm waiting on.(5:28) I'm waiting on my new phone. (5:29) So if I, if you see me looking out the window, that's why I'm waiting for the, you get a sign for this whole thing. (5:33) If we need accountability, then other people need accountability.(5:36) Obviously that's one of the reasons more people aren't in shape. (5:38) Okay. (5:39) Let us do that.(5:40) When you set the goal, and I think this is the problem when you, not you, when the collective you sets a goal, how do you know whether or not you actually want to do it? (5:53) Not you, Alan, not you specifically, but like you, the people. (5:56) Yeah.(5:56) But you're unique. (5:57) Like it's a unique case. (5:58) Yeah.(5:59) I'm being playful. (6:00) How do you know when you have a client that sets a goal, how do you know how committed they are to actually accomplishing the goal? (6:11) Great question.(6:12) Because if you don't know what it's going to take, you don't know whether or not you're willing for that to be your boss. (6:20) When you, when you get a new job, you usually have an interview with the boss. (6:23) There's a reason because you're gonna be working with that person or they're going to be overseeing you.(6:26) You're going to be communicating with them. (6:27) If you're setting a goal for the first time and you've never set that goal before, you have no idea what it's like for that thing to be the boss. (6:33) Have you ever worked for a shitty boss?(6:35) Everyone. (6:37) Almost everyone I've worked for has been shitty. (6:42) Really?(6:42) In some way. (6:43) Yeah. (6:43) Some way.(6:44) I've had some good bosses for sure. (6:45) Well, you were working at finer establishments than I. (6:48) That's for sure.

Alan Lazaros

(6:50) The old me wouldn't have said that, but yeah, definitely. (6:54) Anyways, what I will say though is, let's go back to that question, the core of this. (7:01) How do you know how committed you are when you set a goal?(7:04) I have no idea. (7:05) Let's start there. (7:07) Okay.(7:09) I can tell inside of me how serious I am. (7:12) Remember we did an episode three, four or five last week telling ourselves a story. (7:19) I made a joke about the garbage disposal.(7:21) It's working by the way.

Kevin Palmieri

(7:22) Yes.

Alan Lazaros

(7:23) And it was like, I'm not going to fucking do that. (7:25) I don't care. (7:27) I just know I don't care.(7:28) And I think that's the honesty with self-peace is- How long did it take you to get to that point?

Kevin Palmieri

(7:35) Five years ago, you would have said it. (7:37) It would have gone on a list and you would have kidded yourself maybe, right?

Alan Lazaros

(7:40) Yeah. (7:41) It would have gone on a list and the list never would have gotten done. (7:43) And yeah.(7:45) And then eventually when you're going through your MIT, you'd be like, fuck this.

Kevin Palmieri

(7:49) What do we do?

Alan Lazaros

(7:49) Eventually. (7:50) Yeah, exactly. (7:50) I would delete it from the list.(7:51) I'm just a lot more honest. (7:53) So now my list is smaller and I still can things from the list, but I don't have to can as many things. (7:58) If before it was like a hundred items, I would can 80 of them.(8:02) Now it's 10 items, I can eight of them. (8:05) And I'm constantly trying to do the most important thing based on my most important core values and goals. (8:12) And this, I'm glad we got here.(8:15) The goal dictates what's important. (8:17) I'm also reading another book that I do recommend called the 80-20 principle. (8:21) It's literally called the 80-20 principle by Richard Koch.(8:26) K-O-C-H. (8:28) Excellent. (8:30) Excellent book.(8:32) Way more excellent principle. (8:34) I don't read books for the book. (8:37) I principle is unbelievable.(8:39) And in the book they're talking about how you cannot eat 20 without a goal. (8:44) You can't, it's impossible. (8:46) Therefore you cannot determine what is or is not important without a goal.(8:52) And by the way, goals are just core values in the future. (8:55) All right, hold on. (8:57) I can prove that.(8:59) Hold on. (9:00) You value cars and you have a goal for a car. (9:03) I do.(9:03) Yes. (9:04) Yeah. (9:04) It's just a nicer car in the future.(9:06) Everyone can do that. (9:07) If you have goals, it's just a core value in the future. (9:13) Let's say you're setting a, I want a principle.

Kevin Palmieri

(9:19) Now again, it's a dangerous game. (9:21) I want a principle understanding. (9:22) If you, if you were creating a little disclaimer, right?(9:27) So like you, you go into the database and you click on, okay, I have a goal. (9:31) Cool. (9:31) And it, it comes down health, wealth, love.(9:35) First one, health. (9:37) What is the disclaimer under that one sentence wealth? (9:40) What is the disclaimer under that love?(9:42) What is the disclaimer under that? (9:44) That I think is the minimum that you need to start. (9:47) Nice.(9:48) So like under health, you are going to have to do something extremely uncomfortable in no matter what direction you want to go in every day, done wealth. (10:02) You're going to have to say no to so many things now because you want them eventually. (10:07) There you go.(10:08) And then love. (10:09) I think that one depends on a lot of different things. (10:11) Like, are you looking for, are you going out trying to find love?(10:14) Do you, are you trying to sustain love? (10:15) But like, what's the one under that?

Alan Lazaros

(10:17) It's the same. (10:19) All three of them are the same disclaimer. (10:21) You have to get better.(10:24) Okay. (10:24) So then the end, in order to get better, you have to do things that are challenging. (10:28) And in order to do things that are challenging, you have to endure pain.(10:31) So then there's a, then there's a disclaimer under that.

Kevin Palmieri

(10:34) Yeah. (10:34) And then there's a disclaimer under that. (10:35) The problem is you, if you don't, we talked about this a little bit in a previous episode, if you don't hang along enough in the journey, you don't get the next disclaimer.

Alan Lazaros

(10:47) All right. (10:47) Let me share this. (10:50) Emily and I went and looked at a property and it was, the property was unbelievable.(10:57) One of the nicest things I've ever seen is up in New Hampshire is a private quarry. (11:01) It was beyond magnificent. (11:03) I showed you the photo, right?(11:04) Yeah. (11:07) Disclaimer, 10,000 a month. (11:11) Right?(11:11) Like, awesome. (11:13) And oh, another disclaimer, your kids are going to definitely fall to their death and die for sure when you're not home. (11:18) That should be the first one I think.(11:19) Yeah. (11:20) Emily and I, we were on a walk not long ago and I was like, I'm so proud of us for not falling in love with that place. (11:26) One of our kids definitely would have died for sure.(11:28) This place was like genuinely dangerous. (11:31) I'm being playful with that obviously, but I literally am grateful we didn't get it because it was dangerous and the house was a shithole, I think. (11:39) There was other parts of it that were older than the house and it's like an old place.(11:43) Anyways, the point is, I don't think people look at the disclaimers because you can fall in love with the property. (11:51) I don't think people know the disclaimers all the time.

Kevin Palmieri

(11:54) Yeah. (11:55) I don't think people know it's literally convincing you it's not that bad. (12:02) Yeah.(12:02) So, if there's 99 options and one's like, it's going to cost you nothing. (12:08) The other one's like, you're going to make money doing it. (12:10) This one, the next one's like, it's going to feel so good.(12:12) You've never felt anything as good. (12:13) And then the final one you get to is like, hey, come on, come into this dark alley with me. (12:19) Come on, let me tell you something.(12:21) This is A, it's going to be fucking terrible. (12:24) You're going to want one of the 99.

Alan Lazaros

(12:28) Okay. (12:29) Again, this gets so depressing. (12:32) I think everything in life is like that.

Kevin Palmieri

(12:35) I think it is less, uh, less, what's the word I'm looking for?

Alan Lazaros

(12:40) This is the conversation about being naive. (12:44) Like, isn't, isn't it naive to believe? (12:47) I mean, okay.(12:49) It's a million dollar property. (12:51) Awesome. (12:51) Real estate agents.(12:52) Great. (12:52) This is all solar panels and the sun, the way it hits. (12:55) It's like, awesome.(12:57) Hey, sweet. (12:59) Right. (12:59) And, and I know what you're doing.(13:01) It's all fine. (13:02) They did fine. (13:03) They did a great job.(13:04) Um, all I'm thinking about is the things that are awful about this home. (13:12) I go into the basement and the foundation, it's like, all I see is a giant project. (13:21) I see a giant waste of my time.(13:23) Now the quarry was unreal, unreal. (13:27) Okay. (13:27) But that's awesome.(13:29) You don't need to like, you don't need to convince me that the quarry is beautiful. (13:34) It's like fresh fish. (13:35) Oh, it had its own private beach, giant rope swing.(13:38) Right. (13:39) That's obviously, I think if, if nothing else comes of this episode, I hope everyone looks at the disclaimers more than the shiny stuff. (13:48) I mean, I don't know if you know them.

Kevin Palmieri

(13:51) The only reason I can be here on this microphone telling people about disclaimers is because I hung out in this long enough to realize I didn't know most of them. (13:59) I didn't know most of the, most of what it was going to take.

Alan Lazaros

(14:04) I had no idea. (14:06) A 39 year old house is going to have so many problems that you just don't even know about. (14:12) That's the thing.(14:13) Everything does though.

Kevin Palmieri

(14:14) Like that's, I don't want to make this about, this isn't about money. (14:17) That's not the thing. (14:19) When I bought a new car, I was like, that's awesome.(14:23) And then you go to register the new car and it's like, this is $2,000. (14:27) It cost me $2,000 to register this thing. (14:29) But you would never, how would you ever know that?(14:32) You would never know that. (14:34) You would never, just like we moved to a bigger place, new place. (14:38) Awesome.(14:39) I did my due diligence, but like, you know, it, the electricity, it's like $300 a month, every month. (14:46) It's like, okay, that's pretty much what I expected. (14:48) But if I didn't research it and I was just like, well, yeah, it's a little bit bigger than the last place.(14:52) This is how much it was. (14:54) The disclaimers, I don't think you can really, a lot of them, you understand when you open the package.

Alan Lazaros

(15:02) Yeah. (15:02) I think the only way to learn that is, okay, one is experience, but you can't just learn everything from experience like that. (15:09) Right.(15:10) You know, this as well as I do. (15:12) I remember, you know, I was in my mid twenties, single in between relationships and, and, you know, a girl would be really attractive, but it would be like, uh, I kind of know what that is and I'm not interested, but you, you have to learn that the hard way typically, or you have to like not be naive or you see somebody else. (15:36) Yeah.(15:37) Yeah. (15:37) Yeah. (15:37) Okay.(15:38) What does that mean? (15:38) Well, she's, she parties. (15:40) Okay.(15:40) Well she smokes. (15:41) Okay. (15:41) She, um, she probably now you have to, uh, this is a bad metaphor.(15:47) I want to use this. (15:48) I don't want to use the metaphor. (15:49) What I do want to do is Emily and I have certain criteria.(15:56) This is a good metaphor. (15:58) We have a goal, a home that we can raise a family. (16:02) And then there's certain criteria around that goal needs to have a certain amount, amount of acreage needs to have, uh, a certain amount of square footage needs to be built with this century.(16:15) Okay. (16:16) I say that one adamantly. (16:18) Like I cannot, no, 2010 is the oldest I will go.(16:25) And there've been a few gems that are 2006 and I can't, I can't do it. (16:29) It's a hard line. (16:30) The point is, is that what's underneath this?(16:34) I know what comes with that. (16:37) I want to focus on running my business. (16:38) I don't want to focus on the fact that the floor blew out.(16:42) How do you know what will come with it? (16:43) That's the question. (16:44) If we can answer that, we can answer it all.(16:46) How do you know? (16:47) Um, how do I know? (16:52) I think I just analyze everything upside down and sideways brother.(16:56) Like genuinely like research. (16:58) Yeah. (16:59) Research.(17:00) I guess. (17:00) I think it's thinking like, cause I was super naive for sure. (17:05) But I wonder if I just say that I don't think I'm more naive than most people.

Kevin Palmieri

(17:08) What do you think you were most naive about people, human beings for sure. (17:13) And like what, what they would, what they were capable of.

Alan Lazaros

(17:16) Like I have an EA in the past that it turns out was extremely lazy. (17:19) I just didn't realize it. (17:21) And it's obvious now.(17:22) I mean, it's like, Oh, she didn't care about work at all. (17:25) If I told you that then would you believe me? (17:30) It would have been hard because around me she was hardworking.

Kevin Palmieri

(17:35) Yeah. (17:35) It's the whole thing.

Alan Lazaros

(17:36) But if you had said, Alan, she, all she cares about is the relationship with you. (17:39) She doesn't actually care about work. (17:41) I, you could have gotten me to believe it.(17:43) You could have, but you would have had to fight for it. (17:44) And you would have had to debate with me. (17:46) You've gotten me to believe certain things where it's like, okay, all right, fair.(17:49) But no, I'm not going to take your opinion. (17:52) I need to dig, but no, I would say, what were you the most naive about?

Kevin Palmieri

(17:56) Because this brother, this, this whole fucking thing.

Alan Lazaros

(18:00) Oh, I was naive about people. (18:03) You were naive about goals.

Kevin Palmieri

(18:05) I cannot imagine why somebody would choose to do this. (18:11) I cannot fathom why somebody would wake up one day and be like, I'm going to leave all the certainty and comfort of the old life. (18:18) And I will go out into the wilderness and hunt on my own and sleep amongst the stars.(18:25) I, I, yeah. (18:29) So like when I would hear stories about success, it was like, that's what I, okay, fuck it. (18:34) I want that.(18:35) I want, that's what I want. (18:36) I want that. (18:38) I want it to go the way that it went for that person.(18:40) But then all, then over time you just realize like at the longer you do this, you realize that's just a very small percentage, but maybe the best presentation, the value to presentation I've ever done is talking about Olivia Dean's journey. (18:55) Olivia Dean won best new artist in 2026. (19:00) She's been doing music since she was like 12.(19:02) She's, I think she's been doing music for over a decade. (19:06) Best new artist. (19:07) I don't know why.(19:09) I don't know what the, the specifics are. (19:13) It's probably more than a decade. (19:14) It is more than a day.(19:15) I just don't remember. (19:16) I think she started when she was like, she's probably been doing it for two. (19:18) I think she's 26.(19:19) I think she's been doing music since she was six. (19:21) Best new artist. (19:22) What does that even mean to what you have done?

Alan Lazaros

(19:24) What I think they mean like new as in, you know, them now new to new. (19:30) Yeah. (19:30) New to being known.

Kevin Palmieri

(19:31) That's dumb.

Alan Lazaros

(19:32) No, that's the dumbest thing ever.

Kevin Palmieri

(19:34) That's the dumbest thing ever of all time.

Alan Lazaros

(19:36) Yeah.

Kevin Palmieri

(19:37) I think that's a really good example because if you don't, maybe this, this is the best, this w this is what would have helped Kev. (19:44) Hey Kev. (19:46) Hey Kev.(19:47) Uh, you want to be successful? (19:48) I'd love to be successful. (19:49) Cool.(19:50) Understand that if you ever try to model someone's success, you have to understand the story behind it. (19:56) And honestly, most people don't tell the whole story. (19:57) So you don't know the whole story.(20:00) The Olivia Dean's great. (20:01) You want to be the best new artist in 2036. (20:04) Cool.(20:04) You should have started 10 years ago. (20:07) Unfortunately. (20:09) Now are there some people that make it right away?(20:12) Yeah. (20:12) I think there, there are certain people, but they're, they're, it's, but it's rare. (20:17) Yeah.(20:17) It's rare. (20:18) It's rare. (20:18) It's a bad strategy.

Alan Lazaros

(20:20) It's not a good one. (20:21) It's a bad strategy, but it's not, it's not, it's, it's a, it's like the difference between and what's a good metaphor. (20:30) It's like, I'm going to build a house brick by brick and I'm going to learn how to build a house.(20:34) And I'm going to, I'm going to take a decade to do it. (20:36) But a lot of these books are saying like, make your 30 year goals, a three-year goal, and then you'll just be smarter. (20:41) And it's like, not necessarily, you might be reckless.

Kevin Palmieri

(20:45) It took the Beatles six to seven years to achieve mainstream success. (20:51) But like, that doesn't seem like that's not that. (20:53) If you looked at when they all first picked up an instrument.(20:56) Well, I know, but even, but even this example, like seven years to me is not, that's rare. (21:05) Yeah. (21:06) That's super rare.(21:06) That's great. (21:07) Like that.

Alan Lazaros

(21:07) Yeah. (21:07) That's weak. (21:08) That's small.(21:08) Very small. (21:09) It's very small. (21:09) That's a very short amount of time.

Kevin Palmieri

(21:10) Like they crushed it.

Alan Lazaros

(21:12) Yeah. (21:13) That was like the best that's, that's why you're using it.

Kevin Palmieri

(21:15) That's exactly.

Alan Lazaros

(21:15) Yeah. (21:16) Yeah.

Kevin Palmieri

(21:16) I'm not saying like set, you know, they weathered it out for seven years. (21:21) No, no, that's the quickest ever. (21:22) That's pretty freaking quick.(21:24) So that's what I'm saying is like, I think the context matters too.

Alan Lazaros

(21:29) So you set a goal and then you allow the goal to be your boss or, or you are subservient to it, obedient to it. (21:37) But when you set the goal, you most likely don't know all the disclaimers you most like. (21:43) And I think if nothing else comes of this episode, I hope everyone looks at where they're naive because I don't think I realized this, but now that I'm 37, when I look back and I've been doing the Facebook memory of the day, so I look back every day now, all I see is you were naive.(22:04) That's it. (22:04) Like, Oh, you were naive. (22:06) Oh, you were super naive.(22:08) Oh, you were so naive. (22:09) That's like the on repeat for me.

Kevin Palmieri

(22:11) Yeah.

Alan Lazaros

(22:12) And what does naive mean? (22:13) It means you are like wishful thinking you let's define naive, but that's always what jumps off the page for me. (22:22) It's not that you weren't hardworking enough.(22:24) It's not that you weren't smart enough. (22:26) It's not that you weren't put in the effort. (22:28) It's not that you weren't focused.(22:29) It's you're just naive as fuck. (22:31) You're just super naive. (22:32) Like you can't win and be naive.(22:34) Naive means lacking experience, wisdom, or judgment causing someone to be overly trusting or to see situations too simply. (22:40) Like if you overly trust those real estate agents, you're going to buy the quarries and you're going to assume that your kids are perfect and they won't slip and fall to their death. (22:50) Like you're going to assume because they're like, Oh, well, it's really nice.(22:54) And this, and it's like, this is a shithole for sure. (22:56) Like, just call it what it is. (22:58) Like, it's okay.(22:59) The quarries that make it worth it, but like the home, let's not get it twisted. (23:02) This, this home sucks, you know, but they're, they're in sales. (23:06) So you just, I think that's the weird part about you and I, man, is we're like not selling it.(23:12) We're like the opposite. (23:14) We're like telling people how bad it is.

Kevin Palmieri

(23:15) Yeah. (23:16) But I understand it's probably hard to hear every day, but I do think it's the truth. (23:21) I think it's the truth.(23:23) Yesterday was, I worked more yesterday than I ever, not that I ever have on a Sunday, but like I worked a bunch. (23:30) It was awesome. (23:30) I went golfing in the morning.(23:31) I came home. (23:33) Tyrone was still sleeping. (23:34) Cause she couldn't sleep.(23:35) She didn't get a great night's sleep. (23:36) So I went out on the porch. (23:38) I had, I was working on the porch.(23:40) She came out, she sat, we were listening to music and I just worked. (23:43) It was awesome. (23:44) And everybody else is telling you like, brother, this is year 10.(23:52) We're coming up on year 10. (23:54) Yeah. (23:54) In March, it'll be 10.(23:55) This is where everybody's like, Oh shit. (23:57) Oh, it's starting. (23:58) It's running.(23:58) It starts to run itself. (23:59) Right. (24:00) You just make money while you sleep.(24:01) You don't have to do anything. (24:03) Everybody does everything. (24:04) No, nope, nope, no, no.(24:08) And I know very successful business owners, very successful. (24:12) You and I have a client that makes millions. (24:15) He's working harder than you.(24:17) I get messages from him seven o'clock on Saturday, 10, 15 on Friday night, all hours.

Alan Lazaros

(24:25) Is it all a giant lie dude? (24:27) It's like a giant lie. (24:28) It's like an infomercial dude.(24:30) Infomercials back in our day when we were kids, everyone made fun of them. (24:34) You ever be to the biggie, like the wonder mop. (24:37) They should get an Academy award for those performances.(24:40) Oh my God. (24:41) And then you bring it home and it's like, this doesn't do anything.

Kevin Palmieri

(24:43) Isn't that just human psychology? (24:45) If there is a problem, there will be somebody out there that's trying to monetize the solution that might actually not fix it. (24:51) I mean, I think that's the thing, right?

Alan Lazaros

(24:55) I don't know what year it was, but I think it was when I crossed 30. (24:59) When I crossed 30, I think I just had an honest, I sat myself down. (25:02) I've told you this before.(25:04) It's like, Alan, cut the shit, man. (25:06) You got to cut the shit and all of it's gone. (25:08) No more drinking, no more partying, no more bullshit, no more short-term games, no more fucking friendships that aren't going to go anywhere.(25:16) Like you are done. (25:17) You will build and only build. (25:19) You're not getting any younger brother.(25:22) You're not getting any younger. (25:24) These dreams are not going to achieve themselves, grow up. (25:27) And I had that honest conversation with myself.(25:29) It's like no more bullshit, Alan, no more. (25:33) You think you're going to look back on your life and regret reading great books and working hard toward meaningful goals and being fit and in shape? (25:41) No, you're going to regret the horseshit that you did not need to do.(25:45) Like I regret so much of the terrible choices that I made. (25:50) Persons, places, things, and ideas. (25:52) And now we're successful and I'm proud.(25:55) That's great. (25:55) Awesome. (25:56) But the real reason we're successful is we just, I stopped with all the nonsense, dude.(26:02) I mean, how much in the last seven years, since I turned 30, how much, how much nonsense have I done? (26:07) How many barbecues, how much.

Kevin Palmieri

(26:08) Yeah. (26:09) But in fairness to, even in the beginning, you were on the lower end of that. (26:12) So it's not like you had a drastic, and I'm not saying that to discredit you.(26:15) I'm saying that more. (26:16) Cause that's like the suggestion of how much more you dialed it. (26:19) It's not like you were going to barbecues every weekend before.

Alan Lazaros

(26:22) I mean, yeah, but it, and this is predicated on the goal, the size of the goal, because ultimately I had to have the honest conversation with myself back to the point of this episode. (26:32) If I had no goals, none of that would have had to happen. (26:35) You don't have to sit yourself down at 30 and say, Hey man, it's time for you to get it.(26:40) It's like I had a master's degree. (26:41) I was, it's not like I was a slouch, but it doesn't matter in the context of goal achievement. (26:48) I always say this, and you've seen this in group coaching slides.(26:51) I literally have a slide that comes up. (26:52) It says the science of achievement doesn't give a shit about your feelings. (26:56) And just for this hour, neither will I that's like my permission slide of like, Hey, this is going to be bad.(27:01) But I mean, I really mean it. (27:03) Like if you don't have any goals, you don't have to do anything. (27:06) You don't, you don't literally don't have to do anything.(27:08) You don't have to go to school. (27:09) You don't have to pick up a book. (27:11) If you have a goal though, that's high, that's going to be difficult.(27:16) You can't, you have to be subservient to it. (27:21) You don't have to, don't be subservient to your parents. (27:24) Don't be subservient to the president.(27:26) Don't be subservient to, to people. (27:29) I think that that's where things get wonky. (27:31) Like don't be subservient to your husband or to your wife.(27:34) I know that happens. (27:35) Be subservient to your own meaningful goals and the life that you've designed. (27:41) That's magnificent in advance.(27:42) I had a huge dream. (27:44) And so I had to have that conversation with myself at 30 of like, Alan, you're done with the bullshit and you have to be done based on the science of achievement of a goal. (27:53) You don't have to be done based on anyone else's like, and that's the thing that I hope we get across in this episode, not this episode, but this podcast is like, I don't want to point outward.(28:04) I do it a lot. (28:04) It's like, Hey, you're lazy, all this stuff. (28:06) It's like, I want to just lead by example.(28:09) I want to, I want to take ownership that I'm lazy. (28:12) I want to say, Alan, you're lazy, get better. (28:14) Like, I want to say, Alan, like you waste time, stop.(28:18) But I can't say that anymore because people think I actually am lazy when in reality, I mean like compared to my best self. (28:27) Yeah. (28:27) I think you got to do both.

Kevin Palmieri

(28:28) I think you got to do, you got to call out the bullshit that's bullshit and don't do the bullshit. (28:34) I think that's like the thing. (28:37) I'm so tapped in on the bullshit.(28:40) I've always, I think I was naive for sure, but like, I always could recognize like, I don't know. (28:45) I don't know about that.

Alan Lazaros

(28:47) That Ferrari, try to tell you, you have a fixed mindset.

Kevin Palmieri

(28:50) Yeah. (28:50) It's like that Ferrari. (28:51) I don't know.(28:51) It looks like a rental plate on that thing. (28:54) I don't know if that's actually, I don't know if that's actually yours. (28:57) Last thing, before we get out of here, there are many of you might know of the spectacle that was liver King.(29:02) You know, did you ever know liver King? (29:04) Uh, dude. (29:05) Yeah.(29:05) This is good because I had a client that asked if they were natural.

Alan Lazaros

(29:12) Yes.

Kevin Palmieri

(29:12) No, they weren't there. (29:14) No, not a chance. (29:16) And here's how you know, they got famous liver King.(29:20) He got famous. (29:21) Okay. (29:22) And he was like, I don't want any of this fame.(29:24) You know, I just want to promote the ancestral tenants. (29:27) You know, I just wanted what our ancestors used to do. (29:29) Finally, eventually there was legal ancestors used to run.(29:34) They used to eat liver. (29:35) I don't, I don't think they did. (29:36) I don't think they did it.(29:38) They only ate liver when you got supplements to sell, you got stories to make the emails came out about, Hey, this is the amount to the, to the milligrams of the amount of drugs they were doing. (29:51) That was part one. (29:52) Here's part two.(29:53) They were paying, I don't remember 10 to $20,000 a marketing agency to help them blow up their Instagram account. (29:59) That was all on purpose. (30:01) All of these people that say, well, no, it just kind of happened now for me, when I say it just kind of happened, Alan was reverse engineering it.(30:08) I'm not saying like, I didn't want this to happen. (30:10) Of course I just didn't know how to fucking do it. (30:11) So when I say I'm way further than I thought I would be, I mean that sincerely.(30:17) Yeah. (30:18) All I'm saying is there's a lot of people that are like, Oh yeah, no, I was just like, you know, I was just meditating in a cave. (30:24) And then the idea came to me and I just went out and then no, you pay people to help you figure out how to strategize, how to do this.(30:30) I have nothing against that.

Alan Lazaros

(30:32) Just don't fucking lie about it. (30:34) I'm proud of how honest we are, man. (30:36) Well, it's been, it's been hard because honesty, it sounds so simple, right?(30:44) Just don't lie. (30:45) It's like, no, it's deeper than that because you can't embellish ever. (30:50) You have to tell the whole truth.(30:51) Nothing but the truth. (30:51) That's not easy to articulate. (30:53) You know, it's, it's, but I am proud of that.(30:56) I am. (30:56) And one of the things that I do think is really hard to see is if it is social media and I mean this, this book, for example, the one that I don't recommend, I mean they opened up with stories of how they set a 10 X goal and had a hundred thousand subscribers within, you know, a year and a half. (31:20) And it's like, brother, right place, right time.(31:24) Um, and I don't know, I just, you and I have seen people in the past that have millions and millions and millions of subscribers on YouTube and they genuinely got lucky and they put in the work, they put in the work, but they got lucky or they bought a channel or they bought a channel. (31:43) But that's the other thing you can do.

Kevin Palmieri

(31:44) We know people on account that have bought accounts that have bought social media platforms or channels that had, you know, an Instagram that 150,000 people that's more common than you think.

Alan Lazaros

(31:57) It's insanely common. (31:59) Um, it's, it's the, it's probably the, the rule rather than the exception, unfortunately. (32:05) And I'm glad we're the exception.(32:06) So anyways, if you're out there listening, good, good on you because this is not fun. (32:12) This, I was listening to our own show yesterday. (32:14) I was like, wow, that, how, how hard would it be to hear that every day?(32:19) Good for you for listening because quite frankly, here's what I'm certain of. (32:23) What we're saying will work. (32:26) It'll work.(32:27) You will get a little better. (32:28) You will get a little smarter. (32:29) You will be in better shape.(32:31) This will work. (32:31) Your relationship will be better. (32:32) You will be healthier, wealthier, and more in love.(32:34) You will, but it's not going to happen overnight and it's not going to be a multimillionaire in three months and it's not going to be any of that crap. (32:42) It's not, but you will get healthier, wealthier, and more in love if X, Y, Z happens every single day. (32:49) And that's, I'm proud of, I'm proud of us and it still sucks.

Kevin Palmieri

(32:55) I agree with both of those things. (32:56) And you know what? (32:57) We get the byproducts of, of doing it, right?(32:59) We are doing it every day. (33:01) We're, to me, that's what leading by example means. (33:04) I hang on to a little bit of hope that the world swings back from the BS.

Alan Lazaros

(33:08) I think it will eventually. (33:10) I think it will eventually. (33:11) I think we got to get sick of the fantastical crap eventually, right?(33:15) The mental candy.

Kevin Palmieri

(33:17) I don't know, man. (33:18) I think it's going to get real. (33:19) It'll get much worse.(33:20) I think it's going to get much worse before it gets better. (33:23) But then again, I thought virtual reality was going to be much bigger than it is. (33:25) It doesn't seem like it's panning out the way that was expected.(33:28) So I don't know.

Alan Lazaros

(33:30) Yeah. (33:31) I hope we get back to like the deep human core values that, that are meaningful. (33:38) That's, I mean, that's ultimately what NLU is about.(33:40) So anyways, I don't want to, I'll get off the soapbox, but I'm grateful that we, even if, even if, even if it never is as popular, I'm still glad that we do that in our own life because that's, that's what actually works. (33:55) And, and you made this, you said this yesterday, I listened to the episode and you said at the end, you said something along the lines of regardless of how successful you think that I am, and maybe it's higher or lower than it really is, I know that I'm more fulfilled internally than you think. (34:11) For sure.(34:11) And that I was like, yeah, me too. (34:12) For sure. (34:13) As a matter of fact, so much in fact that like, I don't know, I don't even know if I want to talk about it.

Kevin Palmieri

(34:21) I had a moment, Taren and I got, we, we did a refeed yesterday and I was, I w there's a pizza shop right down the street. (34:27) Dude, when I walked out of the house, I was like, I fucking love my life. (34:30) I was this fucking awesome.(34:31) I get to walk to the pizza place. (34:34) It's fucking awesome. (34:35) It's awesome.(34:36) Yeah. (34:37) Right. (34:37) But, and it's hard, but that's okay.(34:39) That's okay. (34:40) That's okay. (34:40) It's hard in the right direction.(34:42) Trust me. (34:42) It's been hard in the wrong direction before too. (34:44) That was not as, that was not as fun.(34:46) All right. (34:46) If you're looking for truth, if you're looking for unfiltered ways to grow, if you're looking for a coach to help you do it every single day, somebody who practices what they talk about on a podcast, reach out to Alan. (34:56) He'll help you for that.(34:57) Next level fitness accountability group is cranking. (34:59) People are losing weight and or gaining weight at their goal speed for the most part, right? (35:04) Obviously it's going to be a little bit easier in the beginning than it is as we go.(35:07) But if you're somebody who's trying to be more consistent when it comes to fitness, reach out to Alan and or myself. (35:11) Also, Alan does fitness coaching. (35:13) We said, we were going to talk about that more.(35:15) Alan does fitness coaching, right? (35:17) And again, at the end of the day, if it's, think about it this way, if fitness, weight loss, weight gain is just math, Alan's a math guy. (35:23) He could probably help you do that pretty well.

Alan Lazaros

(35:26) If you want to add to that. (35:28) Yeah. (35:28) Peak performance coaching.(35:30) I do fitness. (35:31) I do finance. (35:32) I do business.(35:35) Peak performance is aligning with your goals and being as effective as humanly possible with your time. (35:43) I can help anyone with that. (35:45) I will help you dial in your time towards your goals.(35:47) I'm going to help you. (35:49) I would be called a success coach. (35:50) I just think that sounds stupid, but that's really what it is, is I will help you set a goal that is optimal and then help you dial in your habits and your KPIs toward it, and then help you stay accountable and consistent.(36:04) Every client, if you're listening, I know a lot of my clients listen. (36:07) I'll say this publicly. (36:08) If my clients can't say I am the most dialed in toward my goals I've ever been, then I am failing them as a coach.(36:15) I ask that to my clients constantly. (36:18) I'm going to do this later today with Matt. (36:21) Shout out to you, brother.(36:22) I'm going to say, hey, brother, true, false, semi-true, you are the most dialed in towards your goals you've ever been to date. (36:29) If he says semi-true, I'm going to figure out why and fix it. (36:32) If he says false, I'm going to hang up the phone.(36:34) I'm joking. (36:35) If he says true, I'm going to say, excellent. (36:37) Let's dial up.(36:38) Let's up the ante. (36:39) Usually, people say true. (36:41) Occasionally, I get a semi-true.(36:42) I've never gotten a false.

Kevin Palmieri

(36:43) Cool. (36:44) Well, we had one ... (36:44) Alan and I had a call last week.(36:45) I am super true, as true as one can be when it comes to being dialed in. (36:50) Let's go. (36:51) And that's one call.(36:53) Let's go. (36:53) That's one call.

Alan Lazaros

(36:54) Hey, not bad. (36:55) All right. (36:55) We're done now.

Kevin Palmieri

(36:56) Yeah, we're done.

Alan Lazaros

(36:57) That's it. (36:57) That's it. (36:58) You're good.(36:58) You're good now? (36:59) I'm grown. (36:59) I'm fully grown.(37:00) All right. (37:00) I'm fully grown.

Kevin Palmieri

(37:01) As always, we love you. (37:02) We appreciate you. (37:03) Grateful for each and every one of you.(37:04) If you are as committed as you say you are to getting to the next level, make sure you tune in tomorrow because we will be here every single day to help you get there. (37:10) Keep leveling up to reach your full potential. (37:12) Thanks for joining us for another episode of Next Level University.(37:16) We love connecting with the Next Level family.

Alan Lazaros

(37:19) We mean it when we say family. (37:21) If you ever need anything, please reach out to us directly. (37:24) Everything you need to get ahold of us is in the show notes.

Kevin Palmieri

(37:28) Thank you again, and we will talk to you tomorrow.