The Hardest Part About Getting Good At Something (2499)

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How much better could you become if you stopped needing to look good while you learn?

In today’s episode, Kevin and Alan break down why real mastery requires you to move beyond what feels safe. Most people want confidence before they take a risk, but skill is built through testing your limits, getting feedback, correcting mistakes, and accepting that you may fall short in public.

Drawing from their experiences in podcasting, speaking, fitness, and coaching, they examine deliberate practice, long-term consistency, and the difference between performing well once and building skills that hold up under pressure. Easy wins may protect your confidence, but they can also limit your growth. Define your standard, practice with intention, and earn your next level.

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Show notes:
(1:55) The hardest part of getting good at anything
(3:06) Why easy wins prevent real growth
(6:36) Consistency Vs. Deliberate practice
(8:12) Decide in advance what you will master
(13:34) Match your commitment to your goal
(18:23) Looking good Vs. Getting better
(24:21) Why failure is necessary for mastery
(28:30) The cost of prioritizing image over skill
(31:42) Outro

🎙️ Hosted by Kevin Palmieri and Alan Lazaros

Next Level University is a top-ranked daily podcast for dream chasers and self-improvement lovers. With over 2,100 episodes, we help you level up in life, love, health, and wealth one day at a time. Subscribe for real, honest, no-fluff growth every single day.

Transcript

(0:00) The problem with wanting to get good at something is you almost have to look bad at it in public (0:07) to get good at it, and it is this weird paradox. Failing forward is required for anyone who wants (0:14) to be world-class at something. Welcome to Next Level University.I'm your host, Kevin Palmieri, (0:21) and I'm your co-host, Alan Lazaros. At NLU, we believe in a heart-driven but no-BS approach (0:28) to holistic self-improvement for dream chasers. Our goal with every episode is to help you level (0:33) up your life, love, health, and wealth.We bring you a new episode every single day (0:41) on topics like confidence, self-belief, self-worth, self-awareness, relationships, boundaries, (0:48) consistency, habits, and defining your own unique version of success. Self-improvement (0:54) in your pocket, every day, from anywhere, completely free. Welcome to Next Level University.(1:05) Next Level Nation today for episode number 2499, the hardest part about getting good at something. (1:12) I am reading Peak right now based on Alan's suggestion, and they are talking a lot about (1:18) deliberate practice. For those who don't know, deliberate practice is focused, structured (1:23) practice designed to improve a specific skill.It usually involves working just beyond your (1:29) current ability, practicing one specific weakness at a time, getting immediate feedback, correcting (1:33) mistakes, and repeating the process and staying mentally engaged rather than simply going through (1:37) the motions. That is essentially what we're talking about. The first piece, working just (1:41) beyond your current ability.If you want to get good at speaking, now what's a better example? (1:49) I don't want to use an example that we use. Okay, if you want to get better at building something, (1:58) let's say you're in construction, you want to get better at building something. (2:04) When you become a natural at building a shed, you have to then build a harder shed, (2:10) and you have to make it a little bit more challenging, whatever that means.Maybe you (2:13) cut down the amount of time it takes, maybe you cut down the budget, whatever it is. (2:16) We don't like that. The reason we work so hard to get good at something is because we want to (2:21) feel confident when we do that thing.But the only way to really, really get good at something (2:25) forever is to constantly and consistently be right on the outside of what you're actually capable of. (2:31) And I think that's why there aren't a lot of people that are like really, really, really, (2:38) really good at things. And that the fitness accountability group is a really good example of (2:43) because once you get fit for the first time, the only real way to get more fit next time (2:49) is to look like you're losing when you bulk and or diet.And that's an interesting piece (2:57) of fitness for sure. I have a perfect example for this. So I had a terrible strategy one time.(3:06) How old was I? 19 maybe. And I wanted to get really, really, really good at Starcraft 2. (3:17) Starcraft 2. (3:19) And they had leagues. There was Bronze League, Silver League, Diamond League, (3:28) and it goes all the way up to Grandmaster.And me and my buddy Ryan (3:36) had the worst strategy for getting better ever. Ready? (3:39) I'm ready. (3:41) Here's what we're going to do.We're going to make new accounts (3:44) so that we start back at the shitty league and we're going to pull an all-nighter and (3:49) we're going to just spank everybody. And we crushed everybody. But that's because we're (3:55) actually Master League because 2v2 didn't go to Grandmaster for whatever reason, but we were (4:01) pretty good.This wasn't the person that I was one of the top 2v2 teams in the country with. (4:07) This is a different person. But basically, we would just crush all night getting matched up (4:14) with people that were terrible, which was fun.It was really fun. I mean, it was awesome. (4:21) You could try different strategies out.You could just have a blast. You didn't even have to try. (4:25) These people suck.But it was bad for getting better. And then not long after that, I kid you (4:31) not, I went to a tournament, paid tournament. Got fucking crushed.The 2v2 team that beat us, (4:44) we won. It was best two out of three. We won the first match because we have one good strategy.(4:52) And the second round, they learned our strategy and prepared for it. We were fucked. So here's my (4:58) point.And I also crushed it in many other ways. That story makes me look bad. But the reality is (5:05) the strategy for getting better, the goal wasn't to get better.The goal was to have fun all night. (5:09) Dumb goal. Terrible goal.Pisses me off that I did it. The truth of the matter is I realize this now (5:16) about myself. And I wish that I had more self-awareness back then.I love getting good at (5:20) stuff. I don't give a shit if I'm already good. I love the process of getting better.I don't- (5:26) You also don't care if you look bad though. (5:28) Yeah. (5:29) That's a big piece of it.(5:30) No, I don't. (5:31) Right? That's a big piece of it. It's like- (5:32) If anything, that's my comfort zone.(5:34) Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.You want to, not you, but me. I want to get good at something so I feel (5:42) confident at that thing. The second you feel confident at that thing, you have to like (5:46) make it harder so you're not as confident anymore.But you're still baseline confident though. (5:51) So there is something to that. It becomes- And then I was thinking to myself like, I don't know, (5:57) I'm definitely not deliberately practicing as much as I could on the podcast.(6:01) Same. (6:02) Definitely. I had that moment of like, fuck.(6:05) That's why I started reviewing the show again. (6:08) But for me, I want to go in with an intention every time. Like I'm going to- (6:16) I'm going to be funny.I'm not going to be funny at all. Whatever it is. I need to- (6:20) What's yours for this one? (6:22) Be more serious.Be more measured. I read a fucking thing in the beginning. I never read (6:28) anything.(6:29) Nice. (6:29) Ever. I don't ever read.But I think that's the thing. Doing it is great. Doing it consistently (6:36) is better.Doing it consistently for a very long period of time is awesome. But that is (6:41) not the key to mastery. Because you have to do it for a long period of time and do it better (6:46) every single time forever, which from the outside looking in, you might look like a loser.(6:54) A great example. Comedians. You know how many shows comedians do before they do their special? (7:02) And you know how many times they probably bomb? Those don't go in the special.Unless (7:08) they're a shitty comedian. (7:09) The special is all the best high fives. (7:10) It's all the best.But the only- (7:12) Same is true for a movie. All the scenes that make it in the movie. (7:16) Photo shoots.Music. Everything. (7:19) Is everything.(7:19) Everything. (7:20) Everything. I actually liked that our podcast wasn't like that.I realize now that's a terrible (7:27) idea. (7:27) Well, it's not good for external success. (7:29) But it is good for mastery.And I'm working through my discomfort of that. But we do have (7:36) to make the podcast just the best. It is what it is.(7:39) Well, we said that in group coaching. I was like, we don't really edit anything. (7:43) Yeah.(7:44) And I said, and I'm not saying you guys should. (7:47) Almost nothing. Sometimes we do.(7:49) Well, yeah. But like in this episode, unless- (7:51) Yeah. Unless something really- (7:53) Right, right.(7:54) Really negative happens. (7:56) But like we don't edit ums or buts or likes or that's not. We don't edit to make us look (8:02) better unless we say something that just doesn't make sense or we go off the rails and Alan (8:06) and I are arguing about something.It's like, this isn't even valuable. (8:09) Yeah, exactly. (8:10) It's rare.(8:12) So deliberate practice. The thing that I think is important is you have to decide in advance. (8:17) I really do believe that.You have to decide in advance. Like the thing that I'm working (8:24) on right now is to be the least full of shit person on earth. Another way to put that is (8:29) just be the most honest person on earth.I think the least full of shit is funnier. (8:33) But the same thing. Be as honest as humanly possible.It's like, well, that's not hard. (8:38) You're just being an honest person. Bullshit.It's very difficult to articulate everything (8:44) as accurately as possible. And you have to give- I was on a podcast two days ago (8:51) and she was like, Alan was a global one or no, a 1% earner in the United States in corporate (8:59) when he was in his early 20s. And I literally said, I have a goal to be as honest as humanly (9:04) possible.I think I said the least full of shit as possible. And I just have to call this out. (9:09) I was a 1% earner globally in the US.Top 1% was actually 350K at the time. Okay. And I wasn't at (9:16) 350K.She's like, you don't need to say that. And I said, no, no, I do. You definitely don't (9:21) need me to.This person was okay with whatever marketing. And again, she was sweet. It's all (9:26) good.But like, I have to do that because I decided. And so for the listeners out there, (9:32) what have you decided? Decide now what to get world class at. I decided to get great at Starcraft.I (9:40) decided to get great at Halo. I decided to get straight A's in high school. I decided to be a (9:44) CEO.I decided to be great at tech. I decided to build my first computer. I decided to be with (9:49) Emilia.I decided in advance. And then I made all those things happen. I think it's a high (9:55) self-belief thing though.I didn't decide anything. But you are now. Yeah.But now I have high (10:00) self-belief. That's good. So everyone can do that in the beginning though.Remember, I don't want to, (10:06) I want to talk from where I think is beneficial, not where I am, because I don't think that works. (10:12) Everyone can decide in advance. I concur on something.I concur. Maybe it's not. (10:18) I think it's just changing the world.It's just getting the door. (10:21) That's what I mean. Well, let's get it.Let's do some examples of that because this is good. (10:24) So those examples I used are just examples. You don't have to pick that.No, no, I know. I know. (10:30) Yeah.But it's for you. It was the same thing. I decided, I decided, I decided that's all.That's (10:34) all. And I think that that is the one habit you have to do before you ever deliberately practice (10:40) anyone, anything. No one's going to stumble upon world-class.No, but I think you can stumble upon (10:47) the thing that you want to be world-class. Yeah. I feel like I stumbled upon podcasting.(10:52) I was looking at old pictures and I was like, Jesus, man, I got, so I went to the, I went to (10:56) a, like a hairdresser, a hair salon last night. Cause I was like, Hey, give me, I don't know what (11:02) to do with this. Like make this be a thing I can wear.And the first time meeting somebody, (11:07) we're talking, what do you do? And she explains to me, like, I think I've always wanted to be (11:10) a hairdresser because I love talking. And it was like, cool. That's a really cool story.(11:15) I'm like, what about you? And I was like, ah, a podcaster. I'm a podcaster. And then, (11:19) then it was like, well, then we were talking about something else and I was like, Oh yeah, (11:23) no, I trained to fight professionally, mixed martial arts.And she's like, okay, (11:27) interesting. And then we were talking about, she said, I almost lit my house on fire because I (11:31) caught butter on fire. And I was like, Oh yeah, I went to the fire Academy too.And then she was (11:35) like, you had a very interesting, strange life. Yeah. And I was like, I have had a very interesting, (11:40) strange life.If I deliberately practiced any of those other things, I might still be doing them. (11:46) For sure. I didn't.So I feel like I did stumble upon this to a degree, to a degree. When I first (11:56) started jujitsu, I wanted to go against the easy kids. I don't want to go against the hard kids.(12:00) Yeah. That's a huge mistake. I wanted to win baby.The majority of my gaming career, if that's what (12:06) you want to call it gaming time, I did try to play against the best. That's how you get better. (12:10) You've got to play against the best.I didn't know that at the time. Everybody needs to know (12:14) that I'm not mad at you smoked my first competition smoked probably. And there's (12:21) levels too, right? Like, I don't know.It's really important for everybody to, (12:30) and here's the problem. If you don't decide in advance, how do you know how seriously to take, (12:34) to take things? I think people, people, my whole life have always kind of said like, (12:40) you kind of take this a little seriously, but now I realize they don't understand. (12:45) I decided to get really good at this.Like in advance, I'm taking it seriously because (12:50) this matters to me. It doesn't have to matter to you. You don't like, who cares? Right.It's like, (12:58) oh, it's, it's just, uh, it's just one test. Don't worry about it. It's like, (13:04) I want to get straight A's.I want to graduate with high distinction. Like, what do you mean? (13:08) It's just one test. Like, fuck yourself with that.That's that's, and that's the wrong mentality for (13:12) sure. You imagine like our valedictorian, like, ah, don't worry about it. You got to see, (13:17) like greatness is built with standards and I can't stand people who try to lower other people's (13:24) standards.Pisses me off. But now I realize in hindsight, they didn't choose in advance to get (13:29) straight A's or, or whatever. And I think that that's so important.Dude, you're not going to (13:34) get to the top of an industry. If you don't decide in advance to figure out how to do it. (13:38) I have one client.He may or may not succeed. I know you might be listening, brother. (13:43) He wants to be an A-list actor.His hero is Daniel Day-Lewis in the acting world. (13:48) Okay. That's the top of the game.We can go for it. I can help you reverse engineer it. Let's do it.(13:53) Everything has to be different now. Everything. These two people, I want to be a working actor.(14:01) Awesome. I want to be Daniel Day-Lewis. Those aren't even close.Everything you do and don't (14:07) and how seriously you take it and how committed you are has to change immediately. (14:12) I was telling you about a company I coach. You have to decide in advance what you want (14:19) and then commit in advance at the level that's necessary to get it.(14:24) And we talk about this all the time. You say that's a high self-belief thing, but (14:28) even if you don't have any self-belief, you still have to aim up. (14:34) Well, I think it gets to a point where you have to understand that you're, (14:36) and again, this is a very fine line, very, very, very fine line.You look in the mirror, (14:45) understand your 80% is still better than most people's 100%. They're not going to notice you're (14:50) not as good as you want to be in the moment. And I think that that is permission.I think I needed (14:56) when I started, when I really felt like I started to lock in speaking, let's hope I don't fuck (15:01) anything up in this episode. It was when I went into a speech and said, I'm going to try something (15:05) different today. I'm going to try something different.I'm going to go off script. I'm going (15:09) to whatever. I'm just going to try something different.I'm not going to go in and just (15:13) play comfortable. I don't want to do that. I'm okay.If I mess up because nobody else is going (15:18) to know, nobody's going to know I mess up. I'll know, but I'd rather say like, I went for it. (15:25) I went for it and it didn't land.And I think one of the things that really helped me is when you (15:30) and I would speak on stage together, I started trying to be funnier. And that was always, (15:34) that always felt like a risk. I didn't know what was going to happen.And people would laugh. It's (15:38) like, all right, cool. That's nice.That's something like that was a test. So I think it (15:43) does. You have, I think you have to get to a certain point where you feel competent enough, (15:47) where if it goes wrong, it will not destroy you.And then you start injecting, okay, I'm going to (15:54) do this. I'm going to do this. I'm going to try this.I don't know if I don't have great examples (15:58) because speaking and fitness, fitness is different. A lot of these things don't have parameters. (16:07) Right.So it's very hard to know what's good. How do you know when you're doing it? How do you (16:12) know when you're doing it? That's such a good question. And that's exactly where we should go.(16:20) I know. I have my answer, but I want your answer. (16:25) Give me, uh, you want to talk fitness as an example? I need an example.Otherwise I'm just (16:31) going to be two clouds, not enough dirt. Like in fitness, you have to know what you're going for. (16:37) Everyone needs like a true North because acting is a little broad.Acting as a lead male in a film (16:45) is a little more specific, right? So (16:49) you have to create the parameters of what you consider success. Whereas for me, (16:55) using that Starcraft reference, just to go back to it, our goal was to have fun. So I was winning (17:01) at the goal.If my goal was to get better, we would have stayed at master and played people (17:06) better. But what, how, what does it feel like when you do that? What do you mean? I'm looking (17:12) for feeling okay. In any, in, it doesn't matter what the, what does it feel like to get better? (17:19) Or what does it, what does it feel like to intentionally make the game harder? Knowing (17:24) you're not actually going to win every time, but you'll get better through it.It's the best (17:29) feeling in the world. It's called flow, but what I need is explanation though. I know this is also (17:37) close to impossible, but that's what I want to get across.It feels like flow. (17:44) What is your fully engaged? You're fully engaged because if you're not, you're screwed. (17:52) You're fully immersed in the past, present, and future all merge into one.Trust yourself. (18:00) That's the feeling for me is like you let go. And it's just like, I, I got this.I got this. (18:07) It's going to, it's okay. I got this.I know what I'm doing. Let me let go of the safety nets. (18:12) Let go of the, let go of the, the guidewire.I got this. And even if I don't got this, (18:19) I got this. I got what will come if I don't have this.(18:23) Can, can we go here? Because it's so obvious to me in conversations like this, that you and I (18:29) were playing very different games in this deliberate practice thing. (18:32) I don't give a shit about the now. Well, yeah, but to a detriment.(18:36) Oh, for sure. It's not about this. (18:38) Perception.So right now I'm going to try to do a great episode, but no matter what, (18:44) I'm going to try to make sure I'm a more effective communicator and a better man. (18:47) That's my priority. My priority is being, getting better toward my ultimate dream of (18:56) reaching my full potential.If, if, and then I believe good episodes are the path to do that. (19:03) And sometimes shitty episodes, obviously, but I don't really care. (19:08) You are focused on making this episode great.(19:11) And then if you grow as a by-product, that's great. It's an extra great. (19:15) I think I will grow.That's my thought. I believe I can do both. (19:20) When you say like, I got this.It's like, it sounds to me almost like in the past, (19:25) you were wired in a way where it's like looking good was number one. (19:28) Yes. Yeah.(19:29) And getting better was number two. (19:31) For me, looking good wasn't even on my goal list. (19:34) Getting better wasn't on mine.Looking good was. (19:40) Brother, there's a reason I never bulked. (19:43) I was just lean forever.Worst idea ever. (19:47) So many years in a row, it was just like, just lean, just going to be lean all the time. (19:52) Worst idea of all time.Didn't know. (19:54) So long-term I would win, short-term you would win. And that's really what it, (19:57) and it depends what you're going for.So, and you've always been so focused (20:02) on like third-party perspective and I'm not making that wrong. I think that's important, (20:06) but I don't think it's the most important. I think what's most important is mastery.(20:11) Yeah. I agree. I agree.(20:12) You do now. Right. And, and you were absolutely right.(20:16) That perception matters way more than I ever could have imagined. (20:19) I didn't realize how many credit hits I was taking. Like if I screw up this episode, (20:24) people actually think that I'm like bad at podcasting.(20:29) Well, it's, you're not making a fucking website behind the scenes that nobody sees. It's like, (20:32) um, uh, I left a bracket open. The whole thing crashed.(20:35) Well, to me, I would be able to tell that that's just one episode on the long, larger journey. (20:42) It's like, you don't have one bad game and people think you're bad at basketball. Like you just, (20:46) you just are having one bad game.(20:48) Unless it's the only game they see. (20:49) Exactly. But, and, and a lot of people are, uh, whenever I meet someone, I'm zooming into their (20:56) past and their present and their future.And so I can see the whole trajectory. That's why I'm (21:00) good at career development. I can see where they were and where they are now, where they're headed.(21:03) I don't ever just, this is your one. Like if you and I were to play a sport together, (21:08) I would, I wouldn't, Oh, he must be awful at football. Cause he shanked that one or whatever, (21:14) or threw it in the corner.I just, I would be able to tell how good you are as an athlete in (21:19) general. And I think that that's something that I just always did, you know, and, and one podcast (21:27) episode doesn't mean you're a bad podcaster. It also doesn't mean you're going to be great (21:31) either.I need to look at the trajectory. I have to look at the trajectory. (21:34) It gets to a place where it feels like it's such high stakes though.(21:38) Yeah, I know. It is. (21:39) Is that what you want? You will lose the Superbowl.It's like, well, you know, we grew (21:42) through it. (21:44) Well, that's how you win the next one. (21:46) Yeah.But what if that's the last one? (21:48) Like, that's the worst mentality ever though. Cause it's not the last one. (21:52) It is the last one.It's not your mentality. (21:54) But it could, I mean, let's say you're 39 years of age. You're pushing it.Father time's (22:00) fighting back. And you're like, father time, give me one more. (22:04) Well, then you're in the wrong sport.Like, I can't, I don't want to use Kobe. Cause I, (22:10) I got to though. RIP.He, people were like, you're going to be depressed. It's going to (22:15) be like, I'm going to do something bigger with my second half than I did my first. (22:19) That's how I think.Regardless of what you think of Kobe, the point I'm making is like, (22:24) everyone didn't understand. They're like, well, you're going to retire from basketball. (22:29) It's like, okay, now you're going to get a little depressed for a while.You're not (22:33) going to, you're going to be lost. He's like, I'm already building my next career. (22:36) We're fine.I'm going to do something bigger next time than I do now this time. (22:40) Here's the thing, regardless of Kobe, that's exactly how I think. (22:44) So you're taking, I'm not upset that I didn't like pro game.I mean, yeah, (22:47) it would have been nice if I hadn't dated that person and had taken it a little more seriously. (22:52) But like, at the end of the day, I would, I'm always playing the long game. Always.(22:58) That the long game is always what matters. Unless you're 97. (23:05) I'm serious.Like, and that's why, well, in, in ballet, it's a shorter game. Yeah. So you, (23:12) you gotta, you gotta, but Ian McClellan is a good example.He wasn't successful in acting (23:18) until he was 60. And then he was one of the most successful actors of all time. (23:23) Like by Lord of the Rings, Magneto.Like I, I just wish the problem is, and I see you. (23:33) This podcast episode is one finite game. It's one stair step toward our goals and dreams.(23:41) And if you're listening, it's one stair step towards your goals and dreams too. (23:46) This, this one episode, isn't going to make or break your life. (23:50) It's if that's your mentality, you have the wrong mentality.It's a lot of pressure. This is one (23:56) episode. Hopefully you listen tomorrow and the next day and the next day and the next day.Like, (24:00) I don't care about any one episode. I care that, that if you were to listen every day, (24:05) you would change your whole freaking life. That is what I'm going for.(24:08) Now, fortunately you are on the opposite end of that. And we've driven to five where like, (24:13) you've got to make sure the episode is good too. It is hard.This, this is an, again, (24:18) another one of those things where you have to figure out how are you wired? (24:21) Now, most people are wired to look good. Yeah, for sure. For sure.And that is to the detriment (24:26) of them getting really good at something. Yeah. Because you kind of can't, you can't look good (24:36) and fail forward.Yeah. You got to risk it. If the workout is easy and you look good doing it, (24:41) you're not getting that much better.Well, that's a really good example is when fitness (24:45) models do, you can speak to this better than I can. Fitness models do photo shoots. You're not (24:51) getting any better.You're using weight. You can actually lift a 300 times. I was using, (24:56) I was using hard weights because you're a buffoon, but you wanted, you wanted to grow, (24:59) obviously.So, but that's the thing, the stuff that we see is almost never the hardest. (25:10) Never. That's why it's marketing.It's very interesting. Or even like performances. (25:16) One of the things they were talking about at peak today was how the 10,000 hour rule is not really, (25:21) it's not a law and it's a whole thing.And they were talking about how the Beatles, (25:25) when they played whatever, whatever place it was, they played like 1800 hours or something. It was (25:30) not 10,000 hours. And they said, honestly, even that though, they weren't really trying anything (25:34) new.They're just playing the same songs over and over and over again. So that might not even be (25:38) considered deliberate practice. That just might be, what's the layer under that? Well, they're (25:41) in front of an audience and they were getting some feedback.So I'd say it's better than being in the (25:45) basement. Right. But I like that we're doing this episode.One thing that I hope lands too, I know (25:51) we got to go, is you can't be successful without being really good at something. And I need this (25:59) to land. That something might be just looking good.I know some people that are successful (26:05) only because they're good at looking good. Those aren't my favorite types of people, (26:09) but that's the reality, unfortunately. But no matter what, all success is built on being really (26:16) good at something.Even if it's being really good at being full of shit. Did that never fully (26:23) connect? No, no, no. Back in the day? That connected.Okay. But you have to identify (26:28) what it is. What is it that made that person successful? Yeah.But I think the problem is (26:33) you only see their public performances, which are usually really good. And if it ever goes bad, (26:41) people lose their minds. I want my fucking money back.You're supposed to show up, (26:45) you're supposed to strum away on this guitar and sing beautifully acoustically. And you were all (26:49) over the place. It was atrocious.I'm going to need, I don't care that you grew. Give me, (26:53) slide me my cashola back. I was here to be where you're so good that even your poor performance (27:00) is still.And that's what I hoped to be. Yeah. And remember when you and I interviewed someone (27:04) on stage and she couldn't hang.Yeah. That was really hard for me. It was like, I feel so caged (27:11) by your inadequacy.And she was world-class at looking good. One of the best we've ever seen (27:15) at looking good, but she wasn't actually good. And I was sitting there going, this sucks.I can't (27:20) actually ask you a real question off script. You need the questions in advance. You have scripted (27:25) answers.It's like, this is a terrible idea. Now I realize we've ever done that. Well, brother, (27:30) I want to be able to walk into any room fully capable of whatever happens.Well, that was also (27:35) partly our fault too. We did set that person up for failure. Fair.But honestly, I don't agree (27:43) with that fully. I think some of why we set her up the way we did is because she was so good at (27:49) looking good, but not actually that good. And maybe you knew the Delta.I didn't know how bad (27:54) the Delta was because I knew she was good at looking good, but I figured she'd be within Hail (27:58) Mary distance of as good as she looked. Um, and I might've underestimated like how hard it is to (28:04) speak in front of an audience or whatever, but she was awful. She was awful.It wasn't the jam (28:10) for sure. Yeah. I don't know.I think I'm probably more queued in on that. Definitely. (28:16) I was, I was naive back then, dude.I thought people, I didn't know how big the Delta was (28:21) between looking good and being good. Now it's, I don't, I mean, now I don't fall for that shit. (28:26) It's pretty, yeah.It's pretty massive. Yeah. It's massive.Yeah. For all the intentionality (28:30) you have to put into just looking good all the time. You just don't have to worry about getting (28:34) good.Now you do know if you have eight hours, if you have eight hours to get good or look good (28:40) and you put seven hours into looking good, you're not going to have much time left over for reading (28:45) and evolution in the real world. So true. That would be my takeaway.Okay. Who in your life (28:52) is more focused on getting better in real life than looking good on social media? That is a (28:57) very important question. I have one client I'm thinking of new client adore this person's (29:02) awesome.I said, you're already amazing. All we got to do is get other people out of your fucking (29:09) way. You just have to sail away from these people who don't want to see you win.Cause they're so (29:15) insecure. They're so insecure and she's flourishing now. And, and it's like, yeah, (29:20) she's, you just are around a bunch of insecure people that the moment you start to shine, (29:26) they start to like, fuck with you.And, and you need to sail away from that. And now, (29:31) now I'm like sharing with her exactly what's going to happen when she starts to soar. (29:37) And she's like, how did you predict that? I said, massive decade, a decade of this, at least, (29:42) if not two decades of this, just like, why does this happen? Every time I'm about to level up, (29:47) every time you're about to level up everyone in your life, not everyone, certain insecure people (29:52) in your life get freaked out and they start to fuck with you.And that is, that's not a you issue, (29:58) by the way, if you're listening, that's like a human issue for anyone who has low self-belief. (30:05) That'd be a good episode for the future. Like the five hints, the five.Oh yeah. (30:11) Whatever, whatever it is. Five.(30:14) Represents the number one, when you get better and the relationship gets worse. (30:18) No, no. The five things that show you, you're about to level up.(30:25) Oh, something like that. We'll, we'll table that maybe for another time. (30:28) I like it.(30:28) My takeaway would be, yeah, you have to look at it kind of as a game. You have to look at it as a (30:35) game of skill development and skill acquisition. And I think the best way to be really not flexible.(30:43) I don't mean flexible, more resourceful to really get good at breadth. (30:49) You have to test out different stuff. You know, I want, if I'm going to be a chef, (30:54) I want to be able to cook everything.I just want to be able to make grilled cheese. So yeah, (30:57) I get a grilled cheese. I can throw some pepperoni on that for you.Outside of that though. (31:01) I can't do fuck all. I want to be able to do what I want to be able to do it all.(31:06) That that's for you out there. All right. If you are looking to deliberately practice something, (31:11) one of the best ways is to have a coach who is helping you do it.You get immediate feedback. (31:15) You get outside of your comfort zone, all that happy jazz, reach out to Alan. Alan will help you (31:18) next level fitness accountability group.We have another round of the next level podcast accelerator (31:23) starting on Tuesday, the 28th at 5 p.m. Eastern time. If you're a podcaster who wants to grow, (31:30) scale, monetize your podcast, you want to know the habits, the metrics, the mindset, (31:35) all the stuff you need to actually do it. That is what we talk about in that program.(31:40) Good. Yes, sir. All right.As always, we love you. Appreciate you. Grateful for each and every one of (31:45) you.If you are as committed as you say you are to getting to the next level, make sure you tune (31:48) in tomorrow because we will be here every single day to help you get there. Keep leveling up to (31:53) reach your full potential. Thanks for joining us for another episode of Next Level University.We (31:58) love connecting with the next level family. We mean it when we say family. If you ever need anything, (32:04) please reach out to us directly.Everything you need to get a hold of us is in the show notes. (32:10) Thank you again, and we will talk to you tomorrow.