The Power of Perspective for Personal Growth

Ever considered how your perspective can influence your self-image, your relationship with money, and even your day-to-day life decisions?

Prepare for a journey of insight as we unpack the transformative power of perspective, using my personal experiences as a roadmap. This episode unravels how a simple shift of viewpoint can open avenues for self-improvement and provide a profound understanding of life's challenges.

I share personal anecdotes - from my trip to Vegas to the trials of enduring a divorce – highlighting the significant role perspective played in my personal growth. We delve into how a broader outlook can bring about a positive change in our interpretations. The discussion progresses to reflect on our self-image, subconscious patterns, and interactions, demonstrating how changing perspectives can help us navigate our lives better. We also explore the concept of 'zooming out', a technique to achieve a more peaceful understanding of our struggles. 

Join me, Justin Wenck, Ph.D., as we unravel the threads of our perspectives and weave them into a tapestry of self-awareness and growth.

Watch the full video episode at Justin Wenck, Ph.D. YouTube Channel!

Check out my best-selling book "Engineered to Love: Going Beyond Success to Fulfillment" also available on Audiobook on all streaming platforms! Go to https://www.engineeredtolove.com/ to learn more!

Got a question or comment about the show? E-mail me at podcast@justinwenck.com.

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Transcript

Rethinking Challenges and Shifting Perspectives

Speaker 1 0:02

All right , I think we'll start now . Welcome to the show . Today I am talking about the power of perspective . Today I'm talking about the power of perspective , rethinking challenges . This is a topic that this is one of the things like I'm just amazing at is perspective , and the better I've gotten at it , the better my life is , and the better you get at it , the better your life's going to be . So I'm going to go all about into perspective a little deep dive , so you're not going to want to miss this episode . So what's been going on with me lately ?

Speaker 1 0:44

Currently getting ready to go on a trip to Las Vegas , so I'm recording this a little bit sooner and it's one of those things where I'm like I don't even know if I'm a Vegas person . When I was younger , I was like all about Vegas , like oh yeah , I want to go there and have the wildest time and dreams come true and , you know , win money at things and you know meet , do partying and all that stuff , and like I think I went about two years ago and just like I just I don't know if I like Vegas anymore , I don't know if I like the scene and this and that , and so I'm going . This is part of a birthday celebration . So , as a friend and a bunch of other people that some I know and a lot of other people get to meet and it's still pool party season and I'm like , oh , I do love being in water , sun , things like that , because it's like , even though I live in California near San Francisco , there's pools , places . It's just I don't really know of a great pool nearby where I just want to like chill out , hang , things like that . So that sounds kind of interesting and I really know that Vegas is just one of these places . I mean , there's no place like it in the world and that's why I still peen any people come from all over the world to go there . It literally has just about anything and everything you could possibly want .

Speaker 1 2:09

The key is knowing what you want before you go there so you can focus on doing that , because it's the Vegas environment . It accentuates , it accelerates just about anything , and so if you're having a great time , you can have an even more amazing time . The next level of fun is there . If you're not , the next level of depression , depravity , awfulness is also there , because I've definitely had some awful trips to Vegas where I was like going with people I don't want to be hanging out with and it's just like , oh man , just remind me of all the things I didn't like about my life . It's like I don't have the money to do the things that these other people are doing , and just all sorts of ways . And I think this really plays in well with today's topic of perspective , because it was basically when I shifted my perspective about this trip . It went from like , oh boy , I hope I can survive this . Oh my gosh , I can't wait . I'm so excited . And one of the things I'm super excited about I'll talk about at the very end , yeah , and the thing is is that our perspective can just shift us so much . Like for me .

Speaker 1 3:23

In the past , I've used my change in perspective to help me through some really , really awful , horrible times . Like many of you have been listening , you know that I've been divorced . I wasn't married all that long , but I was with the person for seven years , as short and as straightforward as it was supposed to be , had a prenup and all that stuff . It was still one of the worst experiences I had . I wouldn't wish a divorce on my worst enemy . Those of you that have kids and have gone through divorce . My heart goes out to you . Yeah , one of the things that really helped me go through the process and , as painful as it was , I was able to not add more pain , because so much can be like , well , maybe I was a failure , or maybe this or that when I was able to shift my perspective , because now it's super easy to see that I was the best thing , one of the best things I've ever done in my life , because just to be able to not be with somebody that no longer in alignment to the amount of freedom that gives each of us , just phenomenal . The only difference in that perspective really is the time . Yet there's no reason not to have that perspective while you're in something , even while I was in it , just be able to know that , okay , this is going to result in a much better opportunity for each of us .

Speaker 1 4:55

Let's figure this out . Let's go through the process . Did it make everything super easy and fun ? No , yet it made it way less bad if it was just like well , this is not supposed to be happening , this is not good , this is a bad thing . If that was my perspective , if that was all I could see , then it would have been really really tough .

Speaker 1 5:16

Let's get a little bit into what exactly is perspective , because sometimes perspective and opinion can get a little bit intertwined . They're very two distinct things . It really is just the lens of how are you able to see the world . What are you seeing in the world , whereas the opinion is zooming in and focusing on one thing and maybe having a take on it ? If my perspective is only wide enough to see the current situation of the divorce , then my opinion might be that this is really awful and shitty . When I switch that perspective to zoom out and maybe shift to see what's it going to be like a year from now , two years from now , three years from now , and go oh wait , this is going to allow some opportunity for me to live my life differently . Oh , if I look at how things would have been financially , this is long run . Whatever I think is maybe expensive now . Things were done differently , or if I waited longer , it would have been even worse for me . That allows a lot more options to see and then my opinion can change from being like all I see is bad , this is bad to okay . There's some challenging things here that are happening now , yet Overall , this is the best for all of us involved and going to work out great and going to work out fine . Just about anything that you've experienced in life can I'm not going to say magically make everything better , but it can make it a little bit better and it can give you a chance Sometimes when really shitty things happen .

Speaker 1 6:55

Covid was a phenomenal example of . I don't think there was anybody in it that was like , well , this is great . I mean there could have been some people that are like , oh man , I got some biotech stocks like hell , yeah . That were immediately like this is the best thing ever . Yet I know for myself and many other people were like , okay , this sucks , don't like it . Yet what is the possible positive ? What good can come out of this ? That's the zoom in out , the perspective , and so that's one of the .

Speaker 1 7:28

So there's several benefits to having you know the ability to shift , change , expand perspective . There's being able to see . You know the unseen , you know blind spots right , like there are probably , you know , people that knew about that . My marriage had some issues before I did , because they had a different perspective . So often we are just stuck in our own perspective of things . The other is being able to innovate right , being able to go beyond what has just been done . And so if you can kind of see , well , what's the problem from other perspectives , and then that allows for like , well , what's another possible solution , and so this is really big for those of you that work in the tech space or just any type of problem solving thing .

Speaker 1 8:13

So even if you're an attorney , a medical professional , a healer or a creative type , like , if you can shift your perspective , that's not just good for you , that's good for anybody else and you can gift that . And that's one of the things that I love to do for people , and we already talked about sort of the resilience . And the other thing is empathy is , if you're able to shift your perspective to that as someone else , you can have empathy with somebody , and that's going to make it a lot easier to work with somebody , because if you kind of understand where they're coming from , the way they're seeing it , then it makes it easier to go like , okay , they did that , they did that thing that I don't like , not because they hate me , but just because , from where they're seeing it , they thought that was the best option , they thought that was the best way , and maybe we can figure out a way for them to see my perspective , or maybe I can adjust what I'm needing or what I'm wanting , once I really understand them and see it truly from their side . And then the other thing is just avoiding stagnation , just not getting stuck in the same old , same old , because if you just have the same perspective , you're seeing things in the same way , so you're likely going to do the exact same things and so it's just like well , it's been working . Let's keep doing it before , and I'll tell you before , I'll tell you again and I'll keep telling it over and over If you don't change , the world is changing .

Speaker 1 9:32

And so just because you don't change and don't want to change doesn't mean that you can just chill out like that , like every day , money's being worthless , your health is deteriorating . If you're not changing and doing things to continue to make the world the way you want it to be . And part of that is having the perspective of what's actually going out in the world what , how could I shift ? And if you're not trying to see that , you're not able to see that , you're going to miss it and instead of you getting to say , okay , this is how I want it to be . That's when the wall up comes . That's when the illness or the breakup or the job loss it's a quote , unquote surprise . Yet probably to most people there would be no surprise because they have the perspective of seeing that this is happening .

Speaker 1 10:20

You can become proactive in your life by proactively shifting perspective . You might be wondering , okay , what are some ways to work on your perspective ? There's multiple perspectives , but I like this framework of four different main perspectives that you can work with . There's your self perspective , there's a perspective on another , there's a perspective of a third party , an outside observer , and then there's a global perspective . What do I mean by each of these ? How do you use this to your advantage , to your benefit ? I'm a big proponent of if it advantages you , it's advantaging everybody else , because the only time people really in my opinion , from my perspective really do awful things to other people is when they think they have no other choice , that it's just like it's me or them .

Speaker 1 11:15

When we expand our perspective , we can see oh , it doesn't have to be me or them , it can be me and them . Just subtle , little , teeny shifts can have a big , big impact . Your own perspective . This is going to be easy . You've been doing this your entire life . You know what you see , how you see it , how you've seen it . A lot of this didn't really come from you . This was put onto you from other people , from your parents , from going to school , from your coworkers , from your friends . They have instructed you of how to see the world .

Perspectives on Money, Self-Image, and Life

Speaker 1 11:51

One big thing for the longest time was like well , money just has to be earned through a paycheck . That's how I'd seen it . It wasn't until I allowed my perspective to shift , to be opened up , making money other ways , that when I went to house it was like , oh , I could refinance my home . This was back when interest rates were actually going down . All I had to do was fill out some paperwork . Suddenly , I didn't have to pay as much . They even wrote me a check for some extra money . It was just wonderful . I was like , oh okay , there's other ways for money to come in .

Speaker 1 12:26

That's the self-view . Basically , that's your default . What are the other ones and how can we practice those ? The other is the view from somebody else , whenever you're in a situation maybe it's a relationship , or maybe it's a coworker , just anywhere . Even it could be the checkout person . Just consider how are they seeing me ? It can even just be as simple as literally . How are they seeing what I appear like to them ? Maybe this happens to you , but I always find it funny where sometimes I'll wear a really clever t-shirt or just something that maybe has a lot of meaning to other people , but I didn't really care , I just thought it was a cool shirt .

Speaker 1 13:07

I once bought this t-shirt that was from this lucky brand store . It fitted really well . It was this blue , made my eyes pop . It's like triumph motorcycles on it . I'm just like I know nothing . Apparently , to certain people that is a big deal . They get really excited and go oh , triumph motorcycles reminds me of my grandpa , I don't know what the fuck . Anyway , I'd wear this shirt sometimes and somebody just walked me like , yeah , triumph man , you ride like I don't just ride roller coasters , what are we riding ? And then they're like your shirt , the triumph motorcycles . Oh , and I had forgotten how other people are seeing me . They're seeing me in this shirt , so they're seeing me in the shirt . They would see or hear my tone of things .

Speaker 1 13:54

And so just sort of start taking a second , a minute , not even a minute , but a few seconds to consider how is this person across from me perceiving me in this moment . What is there ? It could be quite literal and then there could also be like what is their lens of the world ? Have they met people like me , that look like me , and how has that experience been ? And just considering that , because our appearance is going to be triggering , you know , not good or bad , but it's gonna have reminders of , oh , I saw someone that looked like like the you and they treated me this way , and that's just how we work . It's just we try to do pattern matching and try to go like oh , when I have this pattern before , this is what happened , let's see if that's useful . And it's good for us to recognize consciously that we're doing that . Seven like okay , well , that was then , but this is a fresh moment . What's the ? What's all the information , not just this like quick , subconscious pattern match but remember , not everybody might be working that way and so , if you can kind of go , you know what , based off of how I appear , maybe where this person grew up or their perception people look like me , they could be having this reaction and so Maybe there's something I could do differently in the situation that's gonna make it easier for them to interact with me . So just things to consider . Then the other is what would somebody complete third party ? They're just fly on the wall . What would their opinion be on this ?

Speaker 1 15:29

I remember I was walking , walking down the street from my place . This is just a couple weeks ago and so I gotta go down the street before I turn a corner and I can see the ocean and it's just about one more block and I can walk on the ocean . It's beautiful . But on that corner what I have to turn there is a mini market and as I'm turning that corner , I see a guy on his phone going uh , huh , yeah , I'll get . I'm just right on the corner here , on the near this mini market , you know . And I walk a few feet and then I see , you know , see , in front of me , to the right , another guy on the phone is going like , oh yeah , I'm looking for you and and the other guy goes like , okay , I'm waving my hand . I see the guy waving his hand . I go okay , I just see you . And I'm able to see this interaction of both these people and I know , as I walk by the one guy , I'm so glad that you two found each other .

Speaker 1 16:28

I was wondering how this was gonna end , because I got to see both sides of this conversation and you can also sort of take that view anytime you want as well . So , in an argument or whatever , trying to go like what , what is somebody else maybe seeing ? Like , are they seeing us frustrated ? Are they seeing us in a motion ? Are they seeing us not listening ? And then , as soon as you're able to do that , you have access to that information you can start to behave , act differently .

Speaker 1 16:56

And the fourth one is this global perspective , which is zooming out . Zooming out across all space , across all time , as much , as as much as you're capable of , which is , you know , across all time . And this is kind of what I mentioned a little bit in the divorce thing is zooming out . So you know , the grand scheme like this sucks . Right now . This process is sort of like Figure out who gets what and how . Are you gonna make this happen ? It sucks . Yet you know , in the scheme of my entire life Other people help me , as you know is is the check that I'm gonna write ? Is that really gonna be a big deal ? Is that gonna be like a big nothing ? So do I really wanna Get so angry and try to fight for every penny . And with that perspective , you know , or you know , hey , is this really gonna impact me or impact the world ? Is it gonna have what I wanna be leaving as a legacy If I'm on my death bed ? Am I gonna be like I'm so glad that this person knew I was right about ? You know , this , this scene in star wars , like , is just who gives a shit .

Speaker 1 17:58

A lot of stuff is , you know , not as important as we think it is , and it allows us to really circle back , and I will . What is important ? What is it ? And often , to me , anyway , it's . It's how are we treating other people and how are we enjoying our lives and what's the impact that we're really ultimately having ? A lot of these little things go away when we Broaden our perspective , when we see that . So you know , that's have my perspective , there's your perspective , there's a third parties perspective , and then there's the global perspective .

Speaker 1 18:28

And to be able to go through all of these something I am just masterful at . And if you're like , oh my gosh , I'm having a hard time , I'm not getting it , I got some good news for you coming up starting . So we'll have already had the first one when this episode comes out , but for the rest of 2023 , the first three Wednesdays of every month , I'm doing what I'm calling the ideal life accelerator . It's one-on-one coaching and transformation sessions . So it's going to be every noon on Wednesdays noon Pacific , 3 pm Eastern and these sessions are free . The only thing is is that only five people I can bring into the room where I will do the one-on-one hot seat coaching , where it's a few minutes with each person .

Speaker 1 19:19

But my ability to understand what's going on and find that alternate perspective , I can do incredible things in just a few minutes . So I really want you to experience that . And then , because once you've experienced it , you're going to be able to take that and you're going to be able to do it yourself , which is , ultimately , I want you to be able to find the wider , fuller perspective . So then you can choose your opinion , you can choose how you want to see the world , you can choose what you want to do . You're not just stuck doing what you've been doing over and over and over and over again , because chances are what you've been doing isn't working . I mean , do you have your ideal life yet ? Are you living the life you want ? Because if not , then you've got to get into one of these sessions , so it'll be justinwinkcom slash ideallifex , so it's ideal life accelerator .

Speaker 1 20:05

I have a hard time spelling accelerator , so X for acceleration , even though I know it really starts with an A and there's no X in it , but it makes it easier to spell , so that should be the link in the show notes as well . So , really looking forward to signing up to get in there . The first 15 minutes is going to be streamed out because there's going to be some awesome , amazing nuggets . So even if you don't get a one-on-one session , but it's a way to get you on the list and so you'll be first up for the next session , because these are highly valuable can change your life , and I want you to change your life so that you live the life you want . You deserve to be living your ideal life .

Speaker 1 20:44

So with that thank you for listening about all these different ways a perspective can benefit you , how you can shift your perspective , and would love to be seeing you in my ideal life experience and before I go , what is the big thing that has shifted my perspective on how I'm going to enjoy my upcoming Vegas trip ? So the birthday and other festivities they're only Friday through Saturday midday , but Saturday night is free and I'm like , what would I like to do ? So I went to see what concerts are available and guess who had the ticket available ? Katy Perry . So I've got a great ticket like finale price , good view of Katy

Celebrating Residency and Self-Expression

Speaker 1 21:29

Perry .

Speaker 1 21:29

She's , I think , only like one month left of her residency . I heard that she might have kissed a girl at one point and so I just really want to find out did she like it ? Was there chapstick involved ? So I'm excited to go check this out , find out and just see some spectacle , have some fun , have some enjoyment , get some sun out there at the pool . And so now I'm just like , and I'm excited for it , because I'm going to do what I want to do . I mean , I'm there for to celebrate the birthday duel of that , but I'm also there for me , and that's okay , and I want you to be here for you and doing what works for you . And if you're not , then talk to me . All right , you can podcast at JustinWinkcom or JustinWink PhD on all the socials except for Twitter , x , whatever the hell it's called TikTok , linkedin , facebook , instagram , justinwink PhD . Hit me up there , let me know what you thought , let me know how can you change your perspective ? What are your thoughts ? Looking forward to talking to you soon and with that , good day .