Ep 56: F$cked Out Spiritual Terms Explained with Nida Kazmi

Meditation, Manifestation, Karma…what do these and other f$cked out spiritual terms actually mean? 

Nida Kazmi, one of our most downloaded guests, is back to help explain these terms in plain English so you can actually decide if the terms and the concepts they represent actually matter to YOU! 

If a term doesn't mean anything to you, then it's worth as much as a three dollar bill, which for those international listeners is worth NADA because there is no $3 bill.

 What really matters is can you utilize these concepts and tools to transform your life to be less stressful, more energetic, and full of purpose. This episode will show you how.

Got a question or comment about the show? E-mail me at podcast@justinwenck.com. Remember to subscribe so you don't miss the next episode! Then connect with me at  JustinWenck.com, Facebook, Instagram, or LinkedIn!

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Transcript

Justin Wenck: 0:01

Welcome to the engineering emotions energy podcast. I'm your host, Justin Wenck. Today, I have a very special guest friend of the show from one of our most downloaded episodes of all time, of all time, the brilliant, the amazing nitta cosmi. And today, we're gonna be talking about the most fucked out spiritual terms that we've come across. And we're going to set the record straight on how we understand them so that you can understand because if someone says something, and you don't understand it, it's worthless. It's no good. It's of no benefit. So we're going to be demystifying things like meditation, karma, manifesting, soul, spirit, vibration, all these things. And we'll probably get into more. So like to welcome niddah Welcome back to the show.

Nida Kazmi: 0:51

Hey, man, thank you, I was one hell of an introduction, tying me to all these bullshit terms,

Justin Wenck: 0:59

on tying you to the ability to make them clear and make them easy to understand, because I know you're no bullshit person. And these these words, I love all these words, I use all these words, that people use these words. And if you were asked a lot of people, that's what what do you what do you mean by that, they would probably give you something that actually has nothing to do with the ultimate intention, like manifesting, almost, let's just start there. Since I just said it. About people, people will often mistake manifesting for like, I get shit done. I make stuff happen. I'm manifesting that. And I don't know, to me, that's not that is not actually what it means is like, yes, things do happen. But not probably in the way many people actually end up doing it when they use this term.

Nida Kazmi: 1:44

That's very true. And just just backtrack for a second. So those of you who didn't catch a Justin as a master reframe, or two very, very good technique to use with people who are maybe stuck in some sort of thought about a particular situation or an event. And he just used that reframe on my comments. So go back, if you didn't catch it the first time, catch it again. And it does tie into manifesting too, because how you think about something is how you ultimately end up quote, unquote, manifesting something. But what does it mean? Right, like the way we've used it, in the spiritual community is like manifesting basically means Abracadabra, here's what I magically aberrated into my life. And to most people, including someone like my husband, who is a very logical thinker, it makes no sense whatsoever. But manifesting is actually you know, it's like a formula. It's like a combination of the actions you take, mentally, emotionally and physically, to then bring about the thing that you want in your life. So you know, when when we say like, okay, I want to bring about what what is it that people typically want a Lamborghini? Yeah, in dollars?

Justin Wenck: 2:51

Yeah. Love of their life. Yeah. Yeah. The

Nida Kazmi: 2:53

love of their life. Okay, let's talk about that one, because I've got really good experience.

Justin Wenck: 2:57

She does she does. I've been hanging out with Nita and her husband and like, they are just delightful together. It's just like, yep, you, you, she manifested the man of her dreams. And he's my man of my dreams, after getting to hang out with him. Like, just so, you know, this is that's the other thing is it? Like, if it's truly you're manifesting something of good, it's good, not just for you, but everyone that comes in contact with you.

Nida Kazmi: 3:22

Right? Because I remember. So, you know, my cousin is now still married to her husband now for nine years. The other cousin whose husband, I also really admire, she has been married to that guy for 10 years. So I remember before being married to my husband now, I said, I always looked at these men thinking, you know, wow, like, I really wish my men had these, you know, my husband has these qualities. And they weren't qualities of like, you know, wealth, per se. I never, that's not what I went for. It was how they treated their wives, how they spoke, the kind of integrity they had the kind of consistency they had, and how they showed up as partners. Right? It wasn't about Oh, he's so good looking. And he's so hard. Yeah, he got so much money,

Justin Wenck: 4:11

well, then there would be the corresponding feeling that you would see see them be you know, as the wife the feeling that they would get to experience being with that, that husband, like that feeling love feeling joy feelings, you know, save those learned

Nida Kazmi: 4:28

yo and so completely ultimately for women, you know, what the most important feeling is to being secure in the relationship. Right. So having said all of that, you know, there when I came about to like finally being settled enough in my emotional self to like, figure out like, Okay, what do I actually want to manifest? We, you know, we were discussing this yesterday, like, how did I actually quote unquote, manifest my husband, and there were a series of things that I did. It wasn't just Abracadabra, there was the emotional minds. So being prepared to allow someone and welcome someone into your life involves not just, you know, so called healing work, you know, air quote, healing work and air, quote, wound care and all that stuff, you know, you're sitting there and taking care of major bad habits that you have. You're taking care to practice the things in your life that are reminiscent of having a partner in your life. So Justin actually reminded me of something that I did, and I totally forgot, which was, I used to set the table for two,

Justin Wenck: 5:33

right? Yeah, so preparing for the inevitable future. It's kind of like, it is kind of like the equivalent of ordering something on Amazon, like, you know, it's coming. Like if you're, if you're going to, if you're going to order, you know, that that bookshelf, you can, you can start ordering the books, and the knickknacks, like, it might be a day or two late, but it's Amazon, it's, you're gonna get that bookshelf. So start clearing the space in, in the room and, you know, getting ready of what you're gonna have your tools ready, because it's coming, you know, it's coming. And that's sort of what manifesting is, and not like, I got to make this happen, but like, no, it is happening. You might not know how it's gonna happen. You just know, it is. But it's, it's not dumb luck. And it's not, you know, work till your eyes bleed. And you know, you know, if you're gonna hurt yourself or kill yourself, it's in some ways that that middle way of, you're certain, and you see it, and you feel it. And you do have to do things. Like like she said, she's she was setting the table, that is a physical action, you can't just sit on your ass, and expect it to like, magically, it's possible, but it's probably going to take way longer if you literally just sit on your ass and you just have manifesting thoughts and feelings.

Nida Kazmi: 6:45

I agree. And it's a perfect segue into the next thing I did too. Because, you know, is setting the table literally going to drop that guy or a woman like out of the sky. No, no, fuck no, like, I get what I'm saying. Like, it's not, you know, sounds really crazy, even up to this point. So the one of the other things I did was make the decision to start selling off my excess furniture that I knew that should I to be moving eventually, in the future, whenever this husband comes along, what kind of things would I be selling off and getting rid of. So I spend a great deal of time selling off excess furniture and valuable items that I knew that I wasn't using tremendous amount of time decluttering the house just piece by piece, whether it was a closet at a time, majority of time, or like entire leg carloads of, you know, things that needed to be donated. And, you know, people used to ask me like, and I and then I just started packing up my stuff, too. And people were asking me, like, you know, where are you going? I'm nowhere. I don't even know where I'm going. I had zero plans at that time. But you were ready, I was ready to go. I was I made sure I was ready to go. And like, actually, I'll talk about this later. But the time between when I started doing these things like packing up and you know, setting the table for to and when I met my husband was only like, from what like April to September? Yes, like half a year.

Justin Wenck: 8:06

Yeah. Which, you know, in some some ways, it's like six months, that's but in the grand scheme of your life to you know, get exactly what you wanted for a very important part of your life. That's like nothing, right? No. Um, and the other thing that I and you, you mentioned to me that we haven't talked about, is that you, you're not only listed out, like, what would be the external qualities you're looking for, but then what would your qualities be to be a good match for that? Who would you have to be like, what were your qualities? Or what were the things in your life? And then those are some of the actions you started to take, like, that probably didn't result in the you know, let me sell off this, this old stuff that just weigh me down. Because like, the person that's with the this ideal person, like they don't have a bunch of furniture they got to worry about they are they're ready to go, yes, that person is looking for someone Ready to go?

Nida Kazmi: 8:54

Well, and ironically, you know, when I did end up meeting my husband, like, you know, we he had to move directly to New York City because of his job. And so none of these things would have been used in our apartment in New York City anyway. Right? So the, it's funny, because when you ask me this question of like, Well, you know, how did you know that? You know, doing this would help you? It's like, or, like, how did you know selling your stuff would help you get the person? You don't know. But what I do know is that the laws of physics I guess, and correct me if I'm wrong physics and quantum mechanics is that the universe has to fill a void there, there is no voids in the matter. What is it the

Justin Wenck: 9:35

Yeah, I think I just saw and I didn't, I didn't read the whole article. So you can you can bash me but it was it was something where like, if there's a if there's a total vacuum, in an area, there starts to be like, almost, I can't remember the term these is like virtual protons and neutrons, like, like stuff gets created and stuff literally gets created in an absolute vacuum, like there has to be something, you know, down to the small level. And so you know, out of The Cabal alien, which is an ancient text, there's as below so above, As above, so below. So it's like if something happens on a small scale, it ideally should work on a large scale. And more and more science is starting to show some of this stuff that if it does happen at the smallest scale, it happens at larger scale. Yeah. And even larger scale. So that

Nida Kazmi: 10:18

was the thought behind the packing up of the stuff like, Okay, well, if I make room, then you know, I'm just by getting rid of these things that I'm just making more room for this person to welcome him into my life. Like, he did not need to come into all my clutter. Yeah. So then back to your point about or your question about like, qualities between, you know, him and me. And I, and I explained this to you. But I wrote a letter, you know, to whomever you can call it God or universe like explaining and describing my whole relationship with this Mr. Right, that I call the letter, I still I still keep it, you know, and it was a four page letter that describes all the qualities, whether they were physical qualities or mental qualities of the person, but also the qualities of our life, like, how are we how do we live? What kind of activities do we engage in? Where do we live? What does the house look like, you know, what's surrounding the house? What kind of work? Do we both do? What kind of, you know, activities are we engaged in separately, and together, and there was a lot of things, and I can honestly say that the majority of that letter came true. Some few things that did not are not because they are not part of this life, we're working on those together. And there's a few that I just never needed. Yeah. Which I didn't know any better. But the most critical aspect or component of this letter writing exercise was the corresponding letter from this man, the one that I described, to, you know, God, or whomever explaining what his wife is like, and what his life with his wife is like. And then I went through back through that whole letter saying, What is this woman like, and where am I not like her. And fortunately, by that point, I had done enough, you know, work. And there's, there's that word, the work, that I felt like, I didn't have any massive deficiencies, compared to that character. But I knew there were two or three things that I had to work on, which I did, which ultimately came in extraordinarily handy. and were required for my now relationship. But I didn't know any of this, I was just going by my faith of, well, you know, this kind of person wants this kind of, you know, woman. Yeah, that's who I'll try to be.

Justin Wenck: 12:32

And, yes, some people might go faith, that's like a religious thing. If you don't like faith, go with trust. And if you don't like trust, go with the opposite of fear and worry, because they all most people are really good at fear and worry. But that's just you're having a certainty about an unknown future. So why not have a certainty about an unknown future that is at least Good for you. And that's where, you know, faith trust, ultimately is like, this good thing. Amazon's got my back. So if it works for Amazon, why not for you know who you want. And so I think the one last is you mentioned that it is like a formula, which remains your recipe, and a recipe, a lot of stuff works, but you do sometimes have to make adjustments based on the equipment in your kitchen. And each of us has our own little distinct, you know, that oven that runs a little hot, or you know, that gas stove that heats up faster than you know, somebody electric something like that. So there are going to be individual changes to the formula or the whatever. And I do want to move on, because in a lot of other good topics we do, but I go Yeah, go ahead.

Nida Kazmi: 13:32

I was gonna say this was actually a perfect segue into talking about meditation because one of the last things I also did to manifest my husband was to do the own a un meditation with Sadhguru. And so you know, you like you said there's a formula there's a series of things I did physically like the packing moving, selling things I did mentally, like all the, you know, work under around my personality and things, you know, that we're going to work for relationship and then like this other stuff, like meditation. So that was one of our next topics is, what does meditation even mean?

Justin Wenck: 14:05

Yeah, cuz it almost anyone that's, you know, been in any form of unhappiness, or if you're happy, but you're just around what unhappy people, which probably now covers everybody in anybody that could be listening, right? Now, you're going to come across meditation as like, well, this is the way to, you know, reduce stress, it's gonna allow you to get insights, it's gonna have all these benefits. And yes, they are all true. Yet often, we get wrapped up in Oh, this is just now one more thing I need to do. It's like you're supposed to be eating the right foods. You're supposed to be doing the right exercises. And now you got to have the right meditation practice. And it's just starts to be one more thing that we are lacking in, we're not good enough. Because we think that this is the meditation is an activity. And to me, it's not an activity, it's a state of mind and any state of mind can be accessed instantly. So why are there these practices? Because like most things, if we're not used to it, we need we need some help getting there. And seeing it and then staying there. And so these practices can help us but it, it's not 100% necessary that you do the right one all the time or whatever. So I know your, your thoughts on

Nida Kazmi: 15:12

I think I spend years trying trying to meditate. And one of the things with my personalities, I hate people telling me what to do and how to do it, I just hate it. So people told me I had to meditate a certain way. It's the same thing as like telling me how to pray a certain way, like, in our culture, like, oh, if you're praying, and then your toes are faced exactly this way, and your hands are in spread like this, and, you know, your prayers and accepted like, are you really, really you're telling me that this magnificent part, you know, God that you call Allah is gonna sit there and go your toes were important this way, therefore, I deny the, you know,

Justin Wenck: 15:48

yeah, well, that and that's the thing is that, sometimes we, you know, we start mixing a lot of things up. And meditation does is part of, in some ways, some form a lot, a lot, our most major religions. And so there's there can be religious components to meditation, but that is not necessary to get the benefits of meditation, which is a state of being, and if we focus on Well, what is that state of being, and it really is just like a deep relaxation, where you have access to, you know, sort of your intuition, to, you know, the calm, calm peace, and to the present moment, like right now. Because usually, most of us spend most of our life and it can be actually measured when you are in a quote unquote meditative state by the frequency of your brainwaves. Because usually, when we're out and about doing our thing we're in, I like to call the busy beta waves, which are a faster frequency of brainwaves, which is like focus, and I got to think about this, I gotta analyze this worry this. Whereas when we slow it down to the alpha waves, and then gamma, the mind slows, and we're able to access a lot more that's going on, and you're able to feel better, it slows down, you know, we get out of the sympathetic nervous system into the parasympathetic nervous, and so a lot of health benefits. But then also you have space between your thoughts. And you and you're like, what the fuck does that mean? Because you're the one hearing what I'm saying right now, you're not you're not the one having the thoughts. Don't worry about it, we're gonna move on, it'll sink in or not, we're doing

Nida Kazmi: 17:25

now No, I and, you know, that was part of the challenge is, you know, you, you assume that whoever's telling you these things of how you should be meditating, and how it should be for you, is somebody who's far more experienced, and you're not, therefore this is the truth. This is the truth of meditation, but it's not. And you know, now we're at the point where, you know, we you and I can go into trance state in seconds, and we know exactly how to access certain things we've learned to rely on when we're in trance state, or what I call theta state, you're just using a very deep, slow, you know, quiet space in your mind to access information from you know, what we can call your, your own soul or your higher self, or sometimes I even get to talk to animals and plants. Yeah. And once you get used to it, suddenly, it's not so out of reach, and intangible and weird, you know, I know my husband, when he first heard about it, he, like, he just couldn't wrap his head around it. And then I told him that, you know, it's it, once you get used to it, it's just as natural as sliced bread. There's nothing weird or nothing unusual about it. But it's how the process of how people make you feel like you have to go through these infinite hoops to like, get through a particular level. Like there's no levels. It's just your desire, and your acceptance of where, you know, where am I? And how far can I go?

Justin Wenck: 18:50

Yeah, and they're not to say there isn't benefit. But once you start from, oh, this is a simple state of being. And then you can start doing more practices, longer practices. But when you come from that, that, Oh, now I can just get more benefit. Because you can consciously choose what which practice and for how long and why am I doing it? What am I what am I trying to get out of it, because you're not trying to get somewhere you can get to where you are instantly and then you can just bring in more of what you want. It's like being in the meditative state, that's a great place to be when you're going to like, recall, the things that you might do be doing from what you're manifesting activities are, because you're going to be much able to, you know, have those emotions that you want tied in with those thoughts and those features. And the other thing, you know, is sort of like you mentioned, having, you know, abilities or perceptions is that often we think that whatever we think that is that is true, but being in the meditative state, it puts the thinking the logical mind in its proper context. And we're actually able to, you know, have all these other perceptions, our body has all these other ways. You know, there's, you know, there's the touch, there's the smell, there's all these but there are other things That can be sort of detected, inferred. And we don't have to get into how that is or what that is at this point. But there's other things that you can perceive that go beyond the logical mind and our traditional senses. And you don't have to believe that or not, it's just something you can start to play with once you get into the state. But if you can't get into the state, then that monkey mind that just constant thinking, well, I've learned this, and I think this, that state of mind, this is actually going above that, and allowing you to go like, well, what else is there and allows you to choose the ultimate, you're not just the thinking you that will chitter chatter of like, this guy's crazy. This woman's crazy. You know, I know, I know this, because my teacher said that, and my parents say this, and my brother said that, like, it's going beyond that and going like, Yeah, well, that's one thing. What else is there? And there's a whole smorgasbord. There's not just the, I don't know, we just had lunch, there's not just the biscuits and gravy.

Nida Kazmi: 20:56

Yeah, I you know, and meditation is ultimately like, if you if you just really want to simplify it, meditation is just, it's a means to just relax. It's a it's a dedicated time that you're taking two minutes, one minute, 15 minutes, 15 minutes, I don't care. Yeah, just taking it to relax.

Justin Wenck: 21:14

And that is actually the most powerful state you can be in period. And we all think that, oh, I gotta be, I gotta be focused and agitated, it's like, that has its times. And if you can be that meditative state more often, you will pick the appropriate times and for how long are the activities, so that it has its place, but that's not where you want to live? Oh, I came up with like a really good metaphor for this. So it's like driving, our mind is like a race car. Or let's just say a regular car, like the Toyota Corolla. And it has the ability to read line, and you know, go 85 miles an hour, but you shouldn't keep it there, it's going to break down, it's going to have a lot of harm, but you have that ability. And that's what you know, the the focused beta brainwaves, that's like, you want to pass on a two lane highway and you got a short amount of time, you got to get it done. And it's necessary. But you don't want to be driving like that all the time. You want to chill out, put on the cruise control. So then you can figure out where you want to go, what you're looking at, and enjoy things. And then really make sure you go in there. Because if you're just going Boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, you're likely going to miss your exit, right? And so many of us miss miss the exit, we don't even know where we want to go. Because we're so busy going we forgot to you know, actually set the coordinates of the GPS, right? So when we relax, we have the ability to think Well, where do I want to go set the directions and then go and if necessary, boom, we go into that, you know, red line, at 500 mile an hour, for short bursts, to help us to get to where we actually want to go.

Nida Kazmi: 22:47

I mean, I know I always admire people who you know, you meet people who are just constant, always relaxed, like they never freak out about anything. And I'm just I'm always in awe, because I feel it an aspect that's lacking in me because my brain is usually on the go. Yeah, so yeah, this meditation is a tool. And then you know, meditation is a tool of manifestation. And I kind of want to leave this into the karma subject that we had laid out because

Justin Wenck: 23:13

yeah, let's let's talk. Let's talk karma.

Nida Kazmi: 23:15

Yeah, you know, like a lot of people talk about karma as Oh, as your destiny is written out for you. Like you're doomed.

Justin Wenck: 23:23

She She can do that accent cuz she's Pakistani. And an asshole.

Nida Kazmi: 23:29

Well, believe it or not. I agree. But believe it or not, do you remember a poo in The Simpsons show? Yep, that whole accident was done by white dude. Oh, yeah.

Unknown: 23:41

Yeah, yeah.

Nida Kazmi: 23:42

So but yeah, anyway, so you know, meditation

Justin Wenck: 23:46

and Bart Simpson's voice?

Nida Kazmi: 23:48

A woman a woman? That's right. Yep, you're right.

Justin Wenck: 23:51

The Simpsons is very is very unwelcome lately.

Nida Kazmi: 23:56

The spider all they're pretty accurate projections.

Justin Wenck: 24:00

Weirdly enough, like I don't know if any predictions. They predict the Trump presidency and he predicted

Nida Kazmi: 24:06

quite a few Yeah, Toby's stuff to actually Yeah, really sad. But yeah, so like so you know, karma is considered as like this ultimate destiny. But that's not what karma actually is.

Justin Wenck: 24:19

Well, the other the other common thing is like, it's kind of this Oh, you do good. You'll get good. You do bad you'll get bad, you know? So it's like something bad like, oh, man, you must have some bad karma. You did something bad or Yeah. You know, like, Oh, I should give to charity.

Nida Kazmi: 24:33

You did something bad. So the karma is coming back to you in this lifetime. Yeah. It's like I pretty much don't think that God is that kind of a being that's going to be like, Oh, you go to hell like in this lifetime because you did this and that one like this is the math doesn't work out that way. So when it came to meditation, and I was talking a little earlier about how I meditated as part of like my so called formula to manifest my Husband, it wasn't that I was sitting there manifesting on like that might, you know, please give me a husband, please give me a husband or this is the kind of man I want, it was the most opposite thing you could think of like I went into meditation. And I would ask myself that, how, what do I think? What would it make me feel to have such an extraordinary husband or partner, and I knew that the feelings that I was seeking were of joy, security and comfort, right. And when I thought about what things gave me those feelings of joy, security and comfort, you know, I did those things. So for example, I love sitting on a cold day, with a blanket wrapped around me and a cup of like, hot cocoa or coffee and holding that warm mug, with the blanket on the floor with my cats. And having that, you know, all of those things with me, is what gave me joy, comfort and security. And so I would feel and tap into those experiences, or like reading a good book at my favorite coffee shop, whatever it was, I would tap into those feelings, or I would recreate those scenarios, and really be in those moments. And that emotional state is what actually manifests the thing that you desire into existence.

Justin Wenck: 26:23

One, and the other, I think, important point is that you're you're creating what you want kind of from a blank, a blank slate, because you mentioned Sadhguru, and he's got a new book, called karma all about it. And one of the explanations I really like, how he sort of describes it, you know, is, where does it describe, like, where does karma come from? And so, in some ways, if you go to a lot of the creationists, you know, even Adam and Eve and in Hinduism, and probably a lot of others that basically, there was, you know, there ends up being sort of like a fall or, you know, something happening. And so it's like, what, what happened? Well, so the beginning is basically like, a blank slate of pure intelligence. So basically, anything can happen. And then out of that comes memory. And the memory is karma. And so, when we think of karma is, it's memories of, you know, of everything that came before you, if you had no memories of anything, anything would be possible, which is where pure intelligence would start from. But once you start having a memory, you start having, you start having to, like, you know, want continuity, and you start having dependencies based on those memories. Because it's like, you are you you are everyday who you are, because you remember who you were the day before. Usually, what we do today is very similar to what we did the day before, which is some of the day before and similar to day before. But there's really no reason. There's nothing that's there's nothing physically that stops most people, you know, shorter if you're in a prison and physically, from just Sunday, waking up with whatever resources and just going to anywhere else and starting a different life. There really is. It's totally 100% possible, why do you not do it? Because you didn't do it the day before. And so kind of what you're taught is you're creating from sort of a blank slate letting things go and like, Well, what do what do I want that has nothing to do with who I am today, and who I was the day before the day before that. So that's sort of the letting go of, of your allowing the settling of the karma, not adding the new the new things? Because often we you know, and then there's like, oh, you're adding to your karma. It's, that's, to me, the way I think of that is it's like you have you have these memories of how you do things, habits, habitual patterns, and it's basically you start reinforcing stuff. And one of the things he said is like, Oh, I'm not focusing on like, Where's my future husband? Where's my future husband? Because what does that do? That just reminds you, you don't have a husband, which is reinforcing that pattern, and keeping your karma, you know, bigger, because now it's even more of a habit to not have the husband not have the husband you want.

Nida Kazmi: 29:07

Yeah, I mean, and that kind of falls into quote, unquote, the law of attraction, which was one of those jargon terms and words that we hear that really don't make any sense because the more you introspect and focus on what you do and don't have is, the more it comes back to you. But ultimately, the reason for that is that there you know, the more you focus on something in any which direction, the more emphasis you're putting on it and the more emphasis you put on it, you're you put that thing out of balance in the universe, just like the universal you know, always has to fill a vacuum or void. It also always has to keep things in balance. So how do you do that like well, she keeps saying I want a husband I want a husband, there's an overemphasis this of scales you know, are tipping on one side. So how do I balance it will use you tipped the scales to the other side to balance it out by not giving the husband

Justin Wenck: 30:00

Yeah, and the other, you know, I'll take it to the, you know, a little bit more, more more concrete. Look at that, you know, the subconscious is it that's, that's your autopilot, you know, because it's doing all the stuff while you're not consciously thinking of it. And so if you give it the instructions, it'll, it'll do whatever it can to make that happen. And when you're saying, I want to, you know, I want the car I want I want, the better it's going like, okay, we, okay, the instruction is to want this thing, if you get the thing, then you won't want it anymore.

Unknown: 30:33

So

Justin Wenck: 30:34

you got to be really careful and kind of act as if, oh, this is I have this thing, you know, this, this is already true. And it will, it will go like, Well, wait, we're supposed to have this, we need to figure out how to have this. Whereas if you just want it, they'll figure out how to want it, which is a state of not having it. Yeah, like it's really it's a really messed up. And that's the other reason of don't say, Don't or negatives on things. Because the mind just does not process this there's there's an interesting stat I saw it is basically like if you look at accidents on on like a deserted highway, where basically there'll just be a telephone pole, like once every mile or something. So you know, if somebody is you know, drunk falls asleep at the wheel, like, you know, if you just go by the the size of the telephone pole and the distance between the next telephone pole, it would be like less than 1% chance that you would hit the telephone pole. But what they've seen is it's usually like 80% of people that you know, fall asleep or start to veer off the road, they hit they hit the lone telephone pole. Why? Because they they get conscious, they see the telephone pole and they start saying don't hit the telephone pole, don't hit the telephone pole. And the mind just goes hit the telephone pole, and they hit the telephone pole. So avoid the telephone pole drive into a comfortable place where you can safely come to a stop, you want to always frame it as what you want.

Nida Kazmi: 31:58

Yeah. And I think, you know, framing speaking of framing things is what you want. There's also there's a huge industry behind all of this that I think has bastardized and completely distorted meanings behind certain things. Like we created some words to put some meaning behind certain aspects of spirituality, or to explain intangible things. But I think they they became these like sub topics have, you know, such intense focus that they become completely bastardize in the translation? So something like for example, feminine and masculine energy?

Justin Wenck: 32:37

No, yeah, you can really piss some people off. Now. If you start using those those terms. And you? Yeah, if I, if I don't know that I'm in agreement with somebody on those terms, I will try to speak more to I won't even use those words, I'll try to just use something the qualities that I mean, yeah, because if I just go to that, some, some people just get really freaked out and go, like, What do you mean, like, oh, the woman can do that, or, you know, men aren't that way. And it's like, God, geez, you know, and it's like, we haven't got to know the context. And you know, the because, you know, words have different meanings in different contexts. So masculine doesn't just mean has a penis and feminine doesn't mean has a vagina. like they've You know, they're we all have masculine feminine qualities, and sort of the sense we're talking about. So was there any more you wanted to

Nida Kazmi: 33:22

know, there's a few more you know, that, and I'm not gonna expand on them, per se, but

Justin Wenck: 33:26

we're moving on to miscellaneous terms.

Nida Kazmi: 33:29

Yeah. So no, yes, I wanted to talk about these miscellaneous things, you know, under the subject of like, things that are there in the spiritual world, but that ultimately just make you feel less about yourself. But these are things to watch out for that, you know, you can talk about them in your podcast, and another day, but, you know, there's things like, authenticity. Man, if there ever was a word that was like overused and abused is authenticity. There's things like healing inner child and mother wound or inner wounds and that kind of stuff. There's also vibration. I don't I don't think any of the like vibration, it makes zero sense to my husband, what the hell do you mean by vibration? Whereas if I just said, Oh, like that person, I just, I don't feel like they'd be very kind to me when they talk to me as I just don't want to hang around them. And that's something that makes a lot of sense to my husband. Yeah, all of a sudden. And then there's just other things like abundance, law of attraction, self love, and care and, and a sign from the universe. And so all of these things, I think, are watch outs like, see them, read them, understand them for what they are, but don't, don't don't self inflict upon yourself some sort of unguided pressure that really actually has no tangible meaning, and tangible goals and outcomes missoura stick to stick to the things that you know, will work for you.

Justin Wenck: 34:53

Yeah, so I'm going to give all of you permission. So you know, if somebody says like, wow, What are you? What are you doing? You're like Justin Wenck of the engineering emotions energy podcast, he said I could do this, I give you all permission that if you hear one of these terms, and it hasn't been explained to you by the person, you can go, what do you mean by that? Someone goes like, Hey, man, you gotta you gotta have the prosperity mindset. Don't just go, Oh, yeah, you're right, I got it. You're like, well, what? What do you mean by that? What does that mean to you? Because depending on who's saying it, they could, they could have a very dial down and have really good meaning. Or they could just be basically they've just painted over there same bullshit, with a different color spray paint, but it's, you know, it's a different color, but it's still gonna stink, and you don't want it. So always ask, like, what do you what do you mean? What do you mean by low vibration, because people would just use that as just another way for like, Oh, I don't like that I like this, which is not what vibration supposed to be about at all. And, you know, from my experience, it's supposed to be like, well, how inclusive how close to you know, living a life from a position more love, as opposed to, you know, you know, grasping or needing or whatever, sort of a more a higher level, all inclusive, that's what I would consider high vibration. And so if someone's high vibration, they're probably not going to criticize anybody, they're not going to like, I can't stand that person over there. Just go like, that's, that's person's just, you know, not for me, I feel more comfortable going to the

Nida Kazmi: 36:23

receptive, I mean, to me, like the ultimate high vibration person is someone likes a guru, or I have a couple of ons in my family that they're not actually related to us there. They happen to be family, friends, well, near dear family, friends, they're approached with me, and I can only speak to my experience with them, right? The way they've always spoken to me and treated me is like, I'm good enough as I am. Even though I'm walking through challenges and struggles and really bad decisions. And they highlight every time they've highlighted the most valid, self valued aspect of me, which is how I love and care other people. So maybe they don't treat other people like this, because those people have different high self values, different mistakes, but to me, I know that when I go to them, they've the fact that thing that they value about me the most is how much I respect and love and care for them. And they acknowledge it and then and then they've never said Why do you do this? Or what we know what made you make the stupid decision? And you know, what are you wearing and lose some weight? or gain some weight? And none? None of those criticisms? Not because I think I'm not above criticism, but because they know me to be the person who will self correct without needing their criticism of it. Yeah. And so because of that, I will do anything that I cannot say no to them. Not that they will ever ask me. But if they do, I cannot say no to them. So that to me, is what I think considered to be high vibration and somebody who just, you know, you can go to without being ripped apart and fully accepts you.

Justin Wenck: 38:04

Yeah. And I had to add to that I it's kind of like, well, how, how do you feel after spending time with this person or the situation or consuming this sort of information media? Do you feel? Do you feel scared? Do you feel hateful? Do you feel less than Do you want to like lash out? Do you feel sad? You know, that to say that there's things to be sad about? But you know, for no other reason other than just because you're around this cell? You actually lost something? Or, you know, do you feel accepted? Do you feel good enough? Do you feel value? Do you feel loving? Do you feel at peace? Do you feel relaxed remember, we were talking about how deeply relaxed state of being is very, very powerful, because then you have all access to everything that you can possibly access to your way of being. So you know, yet and this is something you can experiment with. You don't have to go by what I say like, you know, go go watch CNN, Fox News, MSNBC, one hour each inch, figure out how you feel, and then go spend three hours out in nature or three hours just in dead silence? And how, you know, how do you feel, and probably the first experience that would mostly get put in the low vibration category? And then the second experience with nature and that NPS, you're probably like, Oh, that's a higher vibration. So it's just, you know, are we talking about more loving, more helpful emotions? Or are we talking about the emotions that are useful tools, but they're useful because they're supposed to give us a signal we need to get out of this area and go do something else. We're not supposed to live in fear. We're not supposed to live you know, in jealousy or

Nida Kazmi: 39:45

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think my closing point on all of this would be that you know, you don't even have to listen to Justin an eye on any of this. Now, build yourself to the point where you have developed trust in your own intuition. And gut and experiences and that is what you're deciding. Or your guiding path is for your truth.

Justin Wenck: 40:07

Yeah, only listen to someone in that they spark that part that you know, is allowing you to get a better sense of what's true for true for you at a very deep fund, and that's and that goes beyond just what do you want? Because Do you even know why you Wait, why you want what you want? Like, because most of us think like, well, I want to have I want to have the house and I want to have this this spouse that looks this way. And I want to have a job that's got this title. Why do you want that? Is it just because everyone told you that's what makes you a good citizen or whatever. So? Because maybe it's just like being homeless on the beach in Costa Rica May. That's really what you want. If that's what you want. Go do it, man.

Nida Kazmi: 40:50

Which we did.

Justin Wenck: 40:52

Not the homeless part. I really liked my beachfront hotel. Yeah, and that's okay. You can you can truly want a nice beachfront hotel or, you know, a nice ski chalet. Like that's totally fine. It's all it's all good if that's what you want. because more and more I try to like not say good or bad. I like to go is this effective or ineffective? Yeah. This is work from your network from those are

Nida Kazmi: 41:15

those are the your reframe qualities that I love so much, because it takes me like what half a millisecond to go from one frame of mind to another, basically.

Justin Wenck: 41:25

Thank you. You're welcome. So do we do we cover it all? We think we did about manifesting, we talked about meditation, we talked about karma. We got some some miscellaneous stuff of, you know, vibration and masculine, feminine. Yeah. So there's a lot of stuff. So I'd say just anytime someone uses the term, and you're not exactly sure, find out what it means to you, well, find out what it means to the other person too. And then decide if you want to take on that meaning or not, or use your own. And so at least you know what they mean, even though their word might be completely inappropriate. So any, any last things you want to share anything you want people to know about, or no,

Nida Kazmi: 42:07

I think, you know, the world of spirituality as as much of a cult as any other, you know, world, whether it's the world of antique cars, or gun shows, or, you know, personal devout whatever. And there's a there's a great deal that happened behind the scenes that, you know, the public doesn't generally know, um, how some of these spiritual authors got to where they're at. So just remember that there, they were just the same as you before somebody decided that they were worthy of writing a book or some such thing and they became famous, everything is accessible to you. And that's not meant to be a superior statement. But it truly is. If I could give my you know what I've learned and share what I've learned in the last like 10 years it would be that anything that these top spiritual leaders have you have it?

Justin Wenck: 42:54

Well said, yeah, we all have the the potential if we want to use it, yeah. And if you don't want to use it, that's your choice. We have we have freewill. That's the thing. So if you have any questions or comments about the show, email me podcast at Justin Wenck comm sign up to get on the email list there. So make sure you subscribe to the podcast if you like it, rate me five stars and whatever one again, if you don't think it's five star worthy, send me a note. You know, we do like to adapt because I'm here to serve you so that you can be living a life of less stress, more energy and living your purpose. Find me on social media. I think I'm Justin Wenck, PhD on Instagram and Facebook and I'm also on LinkedIn. So Connect, looking forward to seeing you got a lot of exciting stuff. I'm gonna be doing my first in person workshop. So if you're in the Sacramento area, June 13 2021. So you know, be following look for that, because we'd love to connect with you in person as people are starting to get vaccinated and we can start leaving our houses and interacting more safely. So with that, thank you and good day.