You Had the Best Experience of Your Life… Now What?

You just had one of the best experiences of your life.

A trip. A breakthrough. A relationship moment. A massive win.

And then… it’s over.

Now what?

In this episode, Justin breaks down what actually happens after those peak moments—and how to navigate the “come down” without sabotaging yourself or shrinking back into your old life.

Because the goal isn’t just to have amazing experiences…

It’s to integrate them so your life keeps expanding.

Key Takeaways

• The “come down” is real—and normal
  • After a peak, your system recalibrates. That doesn’t mean something went wrong.
• Drop the expectation to “go back to normal”
  • You’re not the same person anymore. Stop trying to be.
• Give yourself space to land
  • Don’t rush back into your routine. Let things feel a little… different.
• Expression is integration
  • Journal it. Voice it. Share it with someone who can actually hold it.
• Not everyone can hold your experience
  • And that’s okay. Share wisely.
• You don’t need to crash to balance the high
  • You can choose gentler ways to come back to center.
• “Better than bad is good”
  • You don’t need perfection. Just don’t go full self-sabotage.

If you’ve ever had an incredible experience followed by a weird drop…

• Reflect: How did you handle the “after”?
• Share this episode with someone who just had a big win or breakthrough
• Follow/subscribe so you don’t miss what’s coming next

Work With Justin

Want support integrating your experiences and actually growing from them?

🌐 https://justinwenck.com/leap

📩 Reach out to work 1:1 or bring LEAP to your group

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Watch the full video episode at Justin Wenck, Ph.D. YouTube Channel!

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Transcript

Justin Wenck: 0:00

Question, what happens after the amazing you've just had an incredible experience, maybe like you had an amazing party you experienced, or a fantastic trip, or you got that promotion, or something happened in business that is just life changing, or maybe it's in your relationships, like maybe that special someone, something just happened, like you got married, or you had a date, or maybe you just, like, discovered you have, like, your best friend in the whole world, whatever it is, something incredible has just happened in your life, and you know that this has been huge. What do you do afterwards? Because the high doesn't always stay so high, right? So how do you handle the come down? I'm going to give you three things to keep in mind, so you can have those amazing experiences and they're not going to derail you, and you can have those more amazing experiences more often, more easily. So I'm going to go over three things. I'm going to talk about, how to eliminate expectations, how to express the experience, and then how better than bad is good. So with that, let's get started. Are you ready to live a life with enough time, money and energy have relationships and connections that delight you? Are you ready for the extraordinary life you know you've been missing? If so, then this is the place for you. I'm a best selling author, coach, consultant and speaker who's worked in technology for over two decades. I'm a leader at transforming people and organizations from operating in fear, obligation and guilt to running off joy, ease and love. It's time for engineering emotions and energy with me. Justin Wenck, PhD, all right, so I just have had a really amazing experience because I was just traveling for the past three months. So this is actually being recorded from California, where where I live. And I hope you've been enjoying the previous episodes, where it was in South America, was in Colombia and Chile, and then went to Europe, was in Greece and Rome. And I guess technically, I was actually in Asia too, because Turkey is both in Europe and Asia. So, like, it was incredible, amazing, like, the food, the people, the experiences, the history, the energies were just amazing. And I'm sure you've had amazing experiences in your life too, where, like, you know, maybe something to do with romance, maybe something to do with your business or your work, or just something like amazing party, or just whatever it is like, maybe it is even like, you know, some sort of spiritual journey, spiritual awakening. And it's great to have these that you've probably noticed, and I talk about this in my book a little bit, you know, engineered to love that, like one of the saddest days of my life was after I had closed on my house, because it's like, Oh, my God, I've done everything. What do I do next? It was very depressing. And I want you to be able to have these amazing experiences and not let them turn into, like, your biggest nightmare, right? Because often in circles where people have, like, very peak, amazing experiences. Well, as often as they like, it gets referred to as the come down. So this is like people that go to Burning Man, or go to, like, you know, some incredible party, and maybe they do some little bit too much medicine, or whatever you want to call it. But it's like, okay, you know, it's amazing. But then there's like, like, you know, things go up, they often will have a tendency to go down as well, and that's the come down. And so how to handle that? So that's why I'm going to go over these three things, these three areas that can help you modulate that. So maybe the the come down isn't so much as, like a soul crushing defeat, but just like a ah, this is a nice little place to rest, relax, recharge and re, attune, realign, for how to have that next incredible experience and allow the average of your life to keep going up and up and up. Because often we kind of have, like, an average we've been living at. And so if something really amazing happens often, there could be a part of us that would be like, well, we got to, like, bring this, bring it back down. So let's have some horrible things happen so things don't get too good. Because, you know, this is we have a certain way we've been living life, and we don't want to change it too much. And if you watch or listen to this podcast, you know we're not about listening to that voice. This is all about how do you grow, how do you evolve? How do you change, consciously, elegantly, with ease, with joy, with love, with pleasure, all these good things. And so the three things we're going to go over is eliminating expect. Expectations, expressing the experience, and then better than bad is good. So what do I mean by these? Let's start with eliminating expectations. The first thing is, after you have the amazingness. And I also do want to say that celebrate the amazingness, to allow yourself to sit in it, enjoy it as much as possible. And that's a little bit what this eliminated expectations is about. Is you might just have these expectations that, like, You got to get back to whatever, however you had been before this peak experience happened in your life. It's like, Okay, I gotta, like, you know, meet up with my friends. I gotta, you know, talk to the people I've talked to, I got to, you know, get right back into business and just things got to go back to how they were, whatever that might have meant. But you've gone through something incredible, and you're actually not the same person, and so allow yourself to be different. And if you've been following, when you're different, your world is different. So a lot of the things that might have you know been perfectly great before you had this incredible experience, they're not they're not going to fit for who you are now. Like One really good example that just recently happened to me, is before I started my trip, I had scheduled a workshop to teach my leap my life energy activation process at a local yoga studio here. And I've been, you know, very excited, you know, working on promoting it, getting it out to people. And it's so funny, just just earlier today, I got, I got, I got the notice they had actually sent it, like, quite a while ago, saying we're really, really sorry about this, but we've got to cancel your workshop. And it's like, Oh man, this sucks. Like I'm bummed, but also, if I'm going to eliminate expectation, it's like, oh well, that workshop was, that's the person that was before the win on this incredible journey, adventure that was so life changing and profound and deeply impactful, that's who set that up. And now, wow, I have all this possibility now, and this is kind of like a freebie. I didn't have to do that old activity. Now I have space to do what is going to be more aligned, more authentic and more beneficial. Because it's like, when I look at it, there's, like, a lot of things that I learned that, oh yeah, that maybe wasn't in alignment or not where I want to be doing things the way I want to do it. Because, as I've said many times before, it's not necessarily what you do, it's often how you do it. And there's so many things I want to do in different ways. And so I'm like, Okay, what's more elegant ways I can get my leap out to people, and it's still fresh and simmering, and so definitely make sure you're, you know, subscribed, you know, like and following and rating and on the list and all that stuff. So you find out, you know, how this is evolving. And for you, it's like, can you just let yourself, like, have a day, like so many people, like, they schedule the end of the vacation so that, like, they get back Sunday night and they have to go back in Monday morning, or maybe they even fly in Monday morning. And can you just allow yourself that that grace, that peace, that space, that like, let things simmer, and you might be like, Oh my What do I? What do I do with this space? And that's what the next two things are going to be about. But allowing people to be different, allowing things to be different, allowing things to maybe not work out, because maybe they weren't meant to, and allowing yourself to just be and to not have to be the old you, right? Because, like old you had things that you did at certain ways, certain times, all these, all these things, like you had an exercise, right? But letting yourself like, not be that you letting yourself just float a little bit like, easily. Land like not have to crash land this thing back to where it was because you, you know you you went up, you went high, and you have all this perspective and viewpoint and different emotions and different experiences and letting things be different, so not having those expectations on yourself or your world, and just letting it be okay that, like, oh, maybe something's changed. I've changed, and it's okay, and just letting it be a little weird, and letting yourself kind of float a little bit like, so as part of my trip, I was on a cruise, right? So this idea of, yeah, you're not, not fully grounded. You're kind of anchored, so you're not all over the place, but you're not stationary either. So allowing yourself to float and to shift and to move and to just be a little different. So that's eliminating the expectations. So the next up, express. Processing your experience, like, yeah, like, finding a good way to share this. And the thing is, is some of the people that maybe you would have wanted to share this with before you went through this, they might not be the right person to share this with, because you've grown, you've expanded, you've changed. You've shifted. They maybe have not. So he is and I'll tell you how to handle the people that like maybe you know you can't just say nothing to them. I'll tell you how to handle that in just a little bit, but for yourself, two amazing possibilities, maybe, maybe I'll have a third one here. One is you can always express to yourself through journaling, through maybe a voice note, something like that, where you write it out, and you're like, this happened, and this was great. This kind of sucked. And I'm worried about this, and I don't know how this is going to work out, and I don't know if I'll ever do anything like this again, and I can't wait to do something a little bit different. Whatever it is you want to get out, get it out. But it doesn't have to be a do another fucking person. This can be for you alone. So you can really go deep and to the to the depths, however dark, however light, however wide, however narrow you want to go. Just express it. So that's one thing. Is basically journaling to write it, either physically or through voice or type it out, whatever works for you. Highly going to recommend this the other the other one is, if you do have a friend that can just like listen without judgment and without, you know, needing to put their stank on it, because a lot of people, you go like, Oh, I did this. And then someone's going to tell you, like, well, here's what that means. This means that you're never going to be able to do that again. And because that's a once in a lifetime thing. So it's all, it's all downhill. It's like, No, you don't, you don't want to get vulnerable with that person. And maybe now you'll see that that's, that's something to look out for. But you if you got this kind of friend that, like, can just listen go, like, can I just share and tell some stories, and I just, I just want to be heard. And they can just go, Yeah, I got you, I got you buddy. And they just listen and, you know, and yeah, and they're just happy for you, happy for all you experienced and without any judgment, without trying to ruin it or get anything out of you like so if you got that person, that's the other great way to express yourself, the third. So you don't have that person. A lot of us don't have that type of person yet, and that's okay. That's where it's really good to have a coach or a therapist, but somebody that, yeah, you pay them money, but it's because they're providing you such an amazing service of being able to just listen without judgment or to reflect back in ways that are constructive and helpful and beneficial. And so if you have that person, yeah, make sure that you have something scheduled, like soon, soon after, so that you can go through that and integrate. Like, I have a couple individuals like that. That helped me a lot. If you don't have that, find that person, like, I could be that person. I love coaching, I love consulting, I love holding space. I do that for, you know, my clients, and, you know, for close friends and things like that. So I'm I'm pretty good at that, I'm pretty good at that, but there's lots of other people that are really great at that too, and they're totally worth it. So let that be one of your resources to help you express so you've expressed your experience. Oh, and here's the thing is, for those that you know, they can't handle the full experience, let them be. Let them share enough that they feel like they got to be part of it. You'll know what parts of those are and but don't try to cram the entire experience down their throat. It's similar to, like a small child, like a baby, like, there's a reason why babies are fed baby food, because if you're like, Here, eat this, eat this full carrot, they're going to choke on it. It's mean, it's harsh. There's people in your life like that, that if you were to tell them, like, the whole depths of what you actually just went through and experienced, they couldn't handle it, and often, much like a baby, they're going to vomit and they're going to they're going to spew some shit, and it's going to be nasty and it's not going to be fun for either of you. And so just letting them know, like, hey, it was a really big experience, very, very amazing, and I'm so glad to be here with you. Like, I really treasure, you know, our relationship and sharing, you know, some some little things. And you know, if there's anything you really want to know, like, I'd love to talk about it, but I'd really love to know, like, what's been going on? You just really, they probably more want to share what's been going on anyway, and they're just, you know, they want to know a little bit, but then they're happy to have the relationship with you. So that's what you do with the people that can handle your fullest expression of what you experienced. And then finally, the third, the third way to handle with what happens after the amazing is to recognize that better than bad is good. So you probably have some things you do to comfort yourself that maybe aren't the healthiest things, right? Let's, let's take it to an extreme, like somebody that might go to like a meditation retreat for a week. They're like, Oh my gosh, that was so incredible. I feel so good. I'm amazing. And then they leave the retreat center, and they just go, and they just, you know, go do a bunch of shots, get drunk. And then it's like, let's do some crack. And let's, you know, let's go get some prostitutes. And maybe I'm going to make some money. I think I'm going to try being a prostitute, whatever it is, whatever it is. They just go completely crazy doing, doing these behaviors. It's like, it's not the first time, but it's definitely the most extreme version of it, because, again, it's a little bit of like that, okay, had that peak, and then now let's get get to that valley as quickly as possible, and going, like, No, we're not, we're not going there. We're not going to the valley yet. Like, let's allow, let's allow some grace. Let's a little, allow a little bit of comfort somebody. It's like, you know what, spent a whole, a whole week eating a vegan, vegan food. It's time to have that meat pizza, right from, from the pizza spot. Like, allow it. But like, you know what, I'm not, I'm not going to have the beer. Or if I am, maybe I'll get a non alcoholic beer, but just finding these ways so that it's it's better than the worst thing you would have done, that you have done that you know you have the tendency to do after these peak experiences, and just allowing yourself to like, be human, to not be perfect, to be riding the wave, and to recognize that, yeah, that was a lot, and You're not exactly sure how to do with it, and that you're you're coping a bit and just being loving to yourself, that you're going through this and you don't have to be perfect, and that it's okay to, you know, indulge in some things that aren't the healthiest for you, and that it's not about being Healthy or perfect all the time. It's not about being riding this high wave non stop. It's about flowing with it and learning and shifting and growing. And that's also part of the, you know, eliminating the expectations, is not expecting yourself to be perfect and, you know, and then also allowing yourself to be a little imperfect, and that it's good, that it's it's better than bad. It's good. And so those are the three things that I would recommend, that after the amazing, after you've had that you know, amazing you know thing at your job, or that great business win, or experience that fabulous life changing party, or spiritual awakening, or that just most incredible thing with another human being, or that great, great trip, whatever it is, is remember these three things, eliminate expectations, express the experience, and the better than bad is good. So I'm curious, how is this landing for you? What are some amazing things that have happened you in the past, and how could you have incorporated these three tips, these three tricks, you know, and how could you do that going forward? So definitely, you know, send me a note, let me know what's landing and share this with somebody that's maybe you know about to have something amazing, or has had something amazing, and I'm looking forward to having way more amazing experiences and way more incredible impact through what I do. So so happy to be sharing this with you. So happy to be back here in California after such an amazing adventure in the world, and I know there'll be more to come so that. Thank you so much and good day. Thanks for tuning in to engineering emotions and energy with Justin Wenck PhD, today's episode resonated with you. Please subscribe and leave a five star review. Your feedback not only supports the show, but also helps others find us and start their journey of emotional and energetic mastery. You can also help by sharing this podcast with someone you think will love it just as much as you do together, we're engineering more amazing lives you.