Who's the Boss? Abby Chick, Best Buds Partnership and Blakemore Flowers

Episode 130: Vonda and Lori are joined by returning guest Abby Chick from Blakemore's Flowers in Harrisonburg, VA.  Abby shares some great tips for success in managing the relationship with an absentee partner in business. Abby also shares some great gained insight, after 10 years in business, on how to gain respect in being the "boss".

Our sponsors:
Flower Clique
Flower Clique Prep Schools

Sponsored by:
Flower Clique
Flower Clique Prep School
Real Life Retail Florist

Transcript

SPEAKER_02 0:05

I helped her find her calling. I did that. I created a space where she could fall in love with flowers. That is my most proud accomplishment.

SPEAKER_01 0:23

Welcome to the business and pleasure of flowers. We're your hosts, Vonda LaFever.

SPEAKER_00 0:28

And Lori Wilson. And we believe that business and fun are a perfect combination. Kind of like us, Vonda.

SPEAKER_01 0:39

Hey, Miss Lori, welcome back. Hello, Vonda. How are you? I am good. And you? Just Peachy. Peachy. No peachy. Peachy Keene.

SPEAKER_00 0:50

We have someone else in the room. We do. We are the virtual room.

SPEAKER_01 0:54

The virtual room. So we're going to continue on with our series, Who's the Boss? And we've asked a special guest who has a partner in the business. And so we have Ms. Abby Chick from Blakemore's Flowers. Hi, Abby.

SPEAKER_02 1:09

Hi, girls. Long time no see. I know, right?

unknown 1:16

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 1:16

That's an inside joke for all of you out there. Yes. I got to see the girls in the flesh not too long ago. It was a real treat. It was fun.

SPEAKER_00 1:25

It was very fun. So Abby, you have a partner, but your partner isn't in the shop every day, right?

SPEAKER_02 1:37

No, no. It feels not correct to say that he's silent, but he's near a silent partner. It's um actually my my very best friend growing up. Um, his mom was the bookkeeper of the shop for the owner who had it before us. And so he had a little intel that uh his that this flower shop was going to be coming available for purchase. And so he, you know, talked to his mom about it. He said, Wow, I'd really, you know, as an investment, I'd love to own it, but I just don't, you know, know anything about flowers. And he said, you know, I do have a best friend that's been a floral designer for the past seven years. Let me see if she has any interest. So um, yeah, kismet. It just really was one of those right time, right place uh juju in the air, all the stars aligned. And um, so we went into it together. And I have the majority um ownership so that we are, I mean, it was a strategic decision that was so that we could be a minority business or woman-owned business. Um, so we, you know, purposely uh gave me that for that reason, but also because I was going to be doing the lion's share of the work. So but it's been really nice just having a sounding board for the last 10 years and and ultimately when there are things that I don't want to deal with, like people who come after you for like they want you to advertise with them, or you know, the myriad of reasons why people want to speak to a business owner. If there's ever, you know, something I don't want to deal with, I say, Oh, why don't you send that to my business partner?

SPEAKER_00 3:22

Yeah. So well, let's back up a minute because you've been on here before and you shared your whole story about how you came in, but in in like a quick nutshell, if somebody is listening and they're like, Who's Abby Chick? Where is she? Tell us a little bit about yourself and how you got in the industry.

SPEAKER_02 3:41

Yeah, I um it was a break from college when I was 19. I had to get a part-time job. Uh, that was my parents' rules. If I was gonna take a break, I was gonna work. And so I got a job working as a florist with no experience. And I did that job for a very long time and then, you know, kept going back to school and just didn't find my passion and something that I could see myself doing every day. And then, you know, I just kind of woke up one day and I was like, oh my gosh, I already like what I do every day, you know, it just it wasn't obvious to me for such a long time that I could make a career out of this, that it wasn't just a part-time job to, you know, pay the bills, you know, in the meantime, until my real life started, you know. And so once I sort of had that realization, um, like I said, that timing was just so perfect. I I had been a good student to the designer who trained me and also to the student of the owner. I really was doing the house account billing and working through QuickBooks and had really sort of stepped up in that business and knew a lot about ordering and just the business practices. Um, so that really gave me a solid foundation. I can't imagine just liking flowers and deciding to, you know, own a business without having that background. Looking back, there was already so much that I didn't know about owning a business, being a boss, you know, when I was 26, 27, but I already had had seven years of experience, you know, so that was paramount to my success for sure.

SPEAKER_01 5:25

And it was awesome that this friend of yours thought of you, right? And then was willing to invest with you in the business.

SPEAKER_02 5:35

Absolutely. I think that um, you know, I look back and I'm like, what was he thinking? He'd known me my whole life, but he must have had some insight that I would be good at it because that's that's a that's a risk, you know. Yes, right. And it's especially a risk to get in business with a friend. I think there's tons of blogs and articles and websites that are dedicated to telling you about like the reasons why you shouldn't go into business with a friend. But we've been very blessed, very fortunate, and um it's really a family business with both of our families. You know, his mom is our is our bookkeeper, and so um we've just we've always kept it in the family and almost fused the two together.

SPEAKER_00 6:21

So you said that you're majority and he's minority. Um what systems do you have in place or checks and balances do you have in place to keep each other accountable? Like, do you have we will meet once a week or we meet once a quarter, or and what do you bring to that meeting?

SPEAKER_02 6:39

You know, just as you can recommend for any system that you put in place in your business, begin as you wish to continue. So the first thing we started before we bought it is we went to a lawyer and you know, we set up ourselves as an S-corp. So we have articles of incorporation and um essentially, you know, a corporate book that lays out if that, then this, how things are divided, how we are accountable to each other. I mean, there's some crazy clauses in there, like what if I become a drug dealer and I'm in prison? What happens to my share? I mean, you want to go to those extremes. What do you mean you never know? Come on. It's kind of like it's kind of like a prenup, right? It is, it's a prenup. It's a it's a business prenup that makes sure that you know, if the worst happens, you are protected. Both parties are protected. But more importantly than both parties, the business itself is protected. That's what's most important is that if anything went south, that the business could continue, could go on. And, you know, for my work family here, there's a lot of security for me knowing that even if something happened to me, my employees who work here have a nice system that would keep it running for them. So yeah, I think just we we meet, we have, you know, our accountant, our bookkeeper, she gives us weekly statements, monthly balance sheets. There's never a time where both of us don't know exactly what the financial status is in our business. Um, he and I just naturally will text and you know, I think if maybe we had a little bit of a more of a business relationship, we would probably have to work harder at setting up specific times, but just naturally we keep each other updated with everything.

SPEAKER_01 8:35

So well, and he has to have a peace of mind having his mother in there being the bookkeeper, right? Because it's like, oh my gosh, you know, she's gonna tell me if something's not going right and give me a heads up. So you are totally transparent because you don't have a choice. I mean, exactly someone in another situation would be like, oh, geez, I'm not really liking what I'm seeing here, and I can make some corrections, but you it's can't be put you up, and it's there.

SPEAKER_02 9:02

So yeah, so even that is a check and a balance for sure.

SPEAKER_01 9:06

It is totally. That's great. It's a really interesting relationship that you have, which is a wonderful friendship partnership that's really seems to be working, and it's been seven years, you said ten. We just had our 10-year anniversary. Oh my gosh.

SPEAKER_00 9:24

Yeah, no, wow, that's awesome. That's awesome. What I like about hearing all of this is that I when you speak of your business partner, it sounds like there's a great amount of mutual respect um between the two of you. Uh, because I I've talked to shop owners like you that have that silent partner, and sometimes it they're fearful or just completely annoyed, you know, like they don't know what they're doing. Um, so you know, do you ever have those days?

SPEAKER_02 9:59

Um, you know, I've found over the years, here's a little therapy session for you. Um over the years, when I've felt any type of resentment or annoyance creeping up, what it has always come back to is I actually haven't done my job to advocate for myself and speak up for what I believe and what I need. Because anytime I have ever, and I hate to say the word asked for something, but said, you know what, we need to do this. You know, I have never been met with anything but you would know you're the expert, you're the one running it. Of course we can do that, you know, or and that can be tricky when there are times where it's like, hey, I think I might deserve a raise, it's been a bit, you know, or I want to purchase this for my team because so there are those times where, you know, especially because he's gonna get dividends, you know, he's getting money based on the health of our business. And so if you're not getting the same amount, you know, that you are putting into it on top of your salary, you know, it would be a lie for me to say that that has never happened. And I think if you asked him, he would probably feel the same way. He's very easygoing. But I think that when those feelings start to creep up of resentment or annoyance, you need to check yourself and say, have I stated my needs clearly, my wants, and and most of the time you find that, like, no, you probably haven't, you know.

SPEAKER_01 11:35

Right. Really well said. So let's move on to you being a boss, okay? And there's I love it because as a noun, a boss is a person who's in charge of a work, worker groups, or organization, right? That is a verb, it's kind of that domineering manner. I'm the boss, right? And it's kind of a negative connotation. So tell me, how do you think your employees see you as being the boss?

SPEAKER_02 12:05

Uh that depends. Are you asking my employees now or are you asking the group of people who worked for me 10 years ago? You know?

SPEAKER_01 12:13

True. That that's a really good point because you have you've changed, right?

SPEAKER_02 12:18

A tremendous amount. Um I I think my employees now, I can confidently say that they all think I'm a really great boss.

SPEAKER_01 12:31

That's awesome.

SPEAKER_02 12:32

And I can also confidently say that there have been people who have worked here for me that would equally agree that I was not the best boss they've ever had.

SPEAKER_01 12:44

Well, and I would have to agree, since I was in your shop just a few weeks ago, that your employees adore you. Yeah, they think you are a wonderful boss. So that's without a doubt. So, but I wanted to hear what you said, and and I love that you said before you weren't that kind of boss, you've learned what it takes to gain respect from your team.

SPEAKER_02 13:06

Yeah. And it's not what you think it is, it's not always what you think it is that's going to gain their respect.

SPEAKER_00 13:14

Right. And that's what I was gonna ask you in those early years. If I was to interview those people and they're like, yeah, she was okay, she wasn't that great. And you're saying they would probably say that. My question is, at the time it was happening, was there any kind of gut feeling of I'm I'm not being a real good boss right now?

SPEAKER_02 13:36

Immediately after, 100%. Um not every time. Sometimes it took a little bit, you know, once the anger subsides. But um, yeah, I I have a temper. Um my husband will tell you, you know, that is a you know, and it's a cop out to just say, oh, well, I come from a family of people who yell. That's just the way we are. We all yell, we get it out of our system, and well, that's great, but that's not everybody, you know? Right. And so I have a temper. I especially if I'm stressed, and it can be external or internal stressors. I would yell. I remember the very first time. Tiffany and I were talking about this earlier. I remember the very first time, um, first year in business, uh, she sent out an arrangement um a week early. It was for the following week on a Tuesday, and I had to go back and pick up this arrangement, and the guy was super not happy because it was a week before their anniversary or their birthday. And I called her instead of just getting back to the shop and talking about the mistake that was made, I called her and yelled at her. I mean, how small she must have felt, how close she was to not coming back. And Tiffany is, as it turns out, the love of my life. Like I can't it still to this day makes me feel really, really icky when I think about it. And I'm so grateful that I feel like that when I think about that.

SPEAKER_01 15:15

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Wow.

SPEAKER_00 15:18

Because that's how our you know, that's how we changed. We've all had those moments. We've all driving, and the key to it is a healthy recognition of, hey, wait a minute, and being able to go back to Tiffany and go, I messed up, I was mad, I should not have taken it out on you. I understand it was a mistake, you know, and just be be honest.

SPEAKER_02 15:40

And that's the hardest part. That's the hardest part. You have to put it into practice. I'm so I'm so proud of how readily uh willing I am to um apologize and admit when I've been wrong and even call myself out in front of the staff, I see it as one of my most important practices for growth. And it also makes them grow because if you model that behavior for them, that like, hey, I messed up, I was sure I was right, I came out at you and I said you did this wrong. And then when you get corrected by one of your staff, you know, and that's that's something that not a lot of um bosses are probably very comfortable with their staff correcting them. And I think there's a time and a place and a way that it has to happen, right? Right, you know, it has to be respectful, but ultimately when you can be the one to say, hey, I was wrong, you were right, and I am so sorry about that, I should have handled that in a di you know a different way, it's it's good for you, it's it's really the best for you as a human being. But what it does for the morale in your shop is it's a miracle drug. Yeah, it really is.

SPEAKER_00 17:00

Well, when when I hear you, I I think when you do call someone out, first of all, you admitting you were at fault for something or apologizing models for them the freedom for them to go, you know what, it's okay if I mess up, to I can be honest about it, I don't have to lie, which is gonna only get them in in further trouble, right? Right. The the other part of this that I think I don't know if this is gonna say this right, but as as a boss, I'm not a boss, but uh as a parent, right, or a leader, when I have to call someone out, when you have to tell Tiffany you send it the wrong date, there there is a big difference in our delivery of saying that, meaning one is going to shame them, yeah, and one might just convict them where they truly feel remorseful and sorry because they hear it in your voice, right? And that one is really hard to do over and over and over again when you've been putting out fires two days after Valentine's Day all day long, and then that happens, and you know, we we have to have a safe space where if we do explode the people around us can love us through it. I mean, we've been joking about when we were all together last week. You guys saw me and it wasn't more of a I am so over this, I don't care about this. I am old, I don't know what I but you guys just did that. My my own boss couldn't stop laughing, which is empathizing to me instead of going, what is wrong with her? Like you you were like, this isn't how she typically models, she's tired, she's over it, she's hungry, yeah, you know, but that's what um you do, Abby.

SPEAKER_02 19:03

I mean, uh, Vonda does it too, absolutely, but you do it day after day because you are face to face with full-time employees and part-time employees, and so I I yeah, and I'm still, you know, totally guilty of what's what's so great now is after all the holidays, after you know, Tiffany's been with me all 10 years now, and I'll say, didn't I do so good this year? Did you even hear me yell once? I'm like, I'm amazing in now, Tiffany. Like, what's gonna happen? You're you can do therapy every day for the rest of your life, and you are never gonna be able to beat back all of the yeah, like you know, I will still lose my temper or my delivery is poor. I I really struggle with that. But if you really make an effort to work on that, you you just like you said, you've created that space where people are like, okay, but that's not who she is. And that's probably not really how she meant it. And I bet she's gonna come back and apologize for that later, right?

SPEAKER_00 20:09

Exactly. So, but you've modeled that. So I all right.

SPEAKER_01 20:13

So let's move on. I've got some questions for you.

SPEAKER_00 20:15

Yep.

SPEAKER_01 20:16

What do you like least about being the boss? Being the boss, that's easy.

SPEAKER_02 20:22

Um, I okay. My cup, my corporate name is Best Buds, right? I went into business with my best friend. One of my core values, as silly as this is, is have a good time every day. My husband said, like, I just can't be happy if I'm not like doing shenanigans or making people laugh. That is so important to me. So, what I really dislike is when somebody in my shop pulls something that makes me have to step out of my coworker role and my comedian role. It makes me discipline and makes me draw a hard line. I hate that.

SPEAKER_01 21:02

Yeah, yeah, I can see that.

SPEAKER_02 21:05

I want to feel like I'm one of everybody here. I really want the freedom to be you and Lori.

SPEAKER_00 21:13

I will be. Oh my gosh, you're the same. You know what the thing is, Abby? It's we were team players. We I'm not good alone. I have to be with my team and I have to be on equal ground or people above me. I don't want to be the one in charge, yeah, because I'm the one making all the trouble. Yeah, yeah, exactly. Yeah, the shenanigans girls. I'm the shenanigans. I if I don't have enough of it throughout the day, and of course, you and I probably do the we go overboard, right? Yes, because then it gets hilarious because now people aren't laughing, they're just annoyed, which makes me laugh harder. Yes. Oh my gosh, we are the

SPEAKER_02 22:00

Same human. I'm so sorry, Vonda. I didn't know what you had to deal with.

SPEAKER_00 22:05

Now she's got to deal with yeah. Oh, how funny you guys.

SPEAKER_02 22:09

It just it just is.

SPEAKER_01 22:10

Okay, so then what do you like most about being the boss?

SPEAKER_02 22:14

So I have ADHD, and I love the fact that because I'm the boss, I never have to finish a task. Because I I have a team of people that I can start a bouquet, and then I'm like, okay, this needs like some filler, and you need to put the card message on it and put it on the delivery table. I am notorious for just starting little things throughout the day and then having somebody. So I it's probably bad for my personal growth with that. And but I would say that I am uniquely qualified to be in this exact position because of my makeup, you know. Love that.

SPEAKER_01 22:55

That's great.

SPEAKER_00 22:56

Well, and the people you've hired, you've looked for people that aren't like you. You know, you gotta you have to find the finishers.

SPEAKER_02 23:06

Oh, yeah. I I totally well, and sometimes the starters too, the people who are going to really set it up and organize it and make sure that I'm staying somewhat on task, you know. You you have to look for people that complement, you know, your idiosyncrasies. Yes. Yes, I agree.

SPEAKER_01 23:28

So the next one is what is your greatest satisfaction in owning a business?

SPEAKER_02 23:34

It's gonna sound so corny and whatever. I I love the joy, I get a lot of satisfaction out of every day knowing that, and again, internally and externally, I have produced a ton of joy each day. Like in the shop, that's probably even more, you know, so, but I love when we are clocking out and walking out the door that most of us shout to each other, I love you, thank you, see you tomorrow. That fills me with like, man, Abby, you are doing it right, you are doing what you set out to do. And when you get that back from your community, that people feel that joy and they're experiencing that through what you're producing, like that's it's tops.

SPEAKER_01 24:28

That's tops, I agree. That's awesome. So then what's your most proud moment? Um, do you have a most proud moment?

SPEAKER_02 24:37

I'm not gonna cry. Um my employee Keisha, I would qualify that as one of my most proud moments. She was a person who came in needing some more work. She's a brilliant photographer, and um, she was in a really hard place in her life, and she didn't love this. She wasn't sure, she just needed something. And her self-confidence was really, really low. And I look at, you know, over the last two years, when I watch her today, and I I watch her training new employees and answering these questions that at one time she would say, I don't know, I don't know the answer. That's what she would always go, I don't know the answer. And I she helped me grow more as a person and as a boss than any other employee I've ever had, and really learn ways of encouraging her and letting her know, like, you do have all the answers inside of you. Like the only thing you're lacking is the is the confidence and just the fact that I've made her fall in love with this job and that she wants to continue to be here. And um, I had another employee who was a college student who worked here part-time, just as a part-time job, and she was a biology major. She graduated and she said, I'd like to stay on a year and work full-time. I'd like to see what that's like. And now, again, we're still very good friends. She's one of my closest friends, she has gone on to work from some for some major event companies up north, and she is a florist. That is I helped her find her calling. I did that. I created a space where she could fall in love with flowers. That is my most proud accomplishment.

SPEAKER_01 26:20

Yeah, that's really awesome. Wow. Yeah, there's nothing better than that.

SPEAKER_02 26:24

And I got my face on the cover of a magazine. If I'm gonna be like a real odd, I did this year. You remember when I I had to give you my blog in so you could.

SPEAKER_01 26:33

I know it is awesome.

SPEAKER_02 26:35

Yeah, yeah, that's a that's a very I've had a lot of like really, really amazing, tremendous moments, and it's hard for me to just you know pick one, but I would say letting people uh have a place to fall in love with flowers is genuinely um it makes me very proud.

SPEAKER_01 26:52

Yeah, yeah. So what suggestions would you have to share with other shop owners or someone who's thinking about starting or owning a flower business?

SPEAKER_02 27:04

In relation to being a boss, I would say you don't really get a lot of like HR support when you own your own business.

SPEAKER_00 27:16

Right.

SPEAKER_02 27:16

That doesn't that doesn't mean you don't need it. That doesn't mean that you know, just because you have a small company that you have to behave any differently, you know. Um I I wish I would have invested more in my personal growth early on, because I like I said, I was 26, I wasn't a fully formed human. I'm still not, but I mean, I wish I would have done more work in the beginning to not just be a great designer, you know, a good customer salesperson that I would have read more, invested more on how to be a good boss a lot earlier because I learned things the hard way. I have some tremendously difficult, you know, I don't regret them, but I have remorse for the way that I've behaved, you know, in the past. And I would say if there's you know anything that you can invest in yourself to really because I think as a boss, you should know that your job first and foremost is taking care of the people who help run your business. I I think that that's yeah.

SPEAKER_01 28:25

Well said.

SPEAKER_02 28:27

So yeah, get all the training, get all the training you need, not just the design training, not just the experience in a flower shop, you know.

SPEAKER_00 28:35

Get the leadership side, get the HR side, get all of it, um, or at least absorb as much as you can. Okay, so here's the last question. I ask it to everyone. There are no right or wrong answers. The question is, Miss Abby, what is inspiring you right now, besides Bonda and I?

SPEAKER_02 28:58

Gosh, well, since you took that answer, um, what is inspiring me right now? I I have never been a person who was like, woo-woo, I'm gonna go out in the forest and I'm gonna forage things, and I'm not a hunter-gatherer. I'm like, I buy my flowers, you cut them from your garden or wherever, and then I will use them. But lately, I have been driving around and I am so distracted and inspired by even just the shape of trees. I don't know what has gotten into me, but as I'm driving and I'm looking at all of these like different branches and foliages and the ones that are blooming, I'm looking at the way that things are shaped in nature, and I'm just like, this is so weird, but I've been imagining like scissors as I'm looking off in the distance of like how I would trim that tree in my arrangement. But I'm just I've been very distracted by nature recently, and I know that's like a duh thing for most florists, but that's never been me um until recently. And everything that I see now, I'm like, I wonder how that would hold up in a vase.

SPEAKER_01 30:10

Um love that. I love that.

SPEAKER_00 30:13

Yeah, that's very cool. That has never happened. Just give it time. You don't know. Well, thanks for coming on here. We really appreciate it. Yes, lovely to see you. All right, back to the grind. Thank you so much for listening to our podcast. We hope you enjoyed spending time with us because we enjoy spending time with you. If you did, make sure you hit that subscribe button or add the business and pleasure of flowers to your Google morning routine or your flash briefing on Alexa. We look forward to seeing you next week.

SPEAKER_01 30:53

So please come back and join us and discover how a bit of knowledge and one small change in your mindset can take you to new levels in your life and business.