Just me talking about what the podcast will be about. Introducing the next 3 episodes.
Just me talking about what the podcast will be about. Introducing the next 3 episodes.
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Welcome to asshole parents. A podcast designed to create introspection and inspiration for our listeners with humor and vulnerability. Together, we will identify patterns of behavior that are the result of having asshole parents. I acknowledge you and I thank you for taking the time to listen to this podcast. I know there are a lot of them there. I'm assuming if you're listening to this one, you were either specifically invited by me because you know me and you are supporting me. Or maybe you were, in fact, intrigued by the title asshole parents. So I invite you to listen to this entire podcast that, in fact, all four in the series to like it and share it with your friends to make comments in the comment section so that we can get a little traction on this podcast.
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So who am I
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and why this topic? Why a podcast and why, asshole parents,
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Let me tell
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you, I am Christian Family, Esquire. I'm a 43 year old mother of three little ones ages two five and seven. I am a twice divorced adult child of divorce, divorce lawyer for nearly 20 years, and my parents who have been divorced for about 35 years. Both live with me. Yes, I am all things divorce. However, a podcast titled divorced tends to alienate people who feel like that's not the topic they need to be listening to. But I would note that divorce is really just to disassociate or separate something from something else or to separate or dissociate someone from someone else. It's a concept of breaking a bound to create a new bond, and in many ways, that's what we're looking to do with introspection and looking at some of the patterns of behaviors that we have that really again, as I stated, are a result of having asshole parents notwithstanding. My personal topic is divorced. I own a law firm Christian family law, where we do a divorce and adoption work here in central Ohio. But that's not really the point of this podcast. I got the idea for this topic from the fact that the parents live with me in my mind. I should be pitching some kind of a reality show to TLC. Parents won't really go for it. I had a lot of different ideas, though, about how this pod cast was gonna work. First idea was that I was gonna call It used to be wed game, and I was gonna ask my mom questions and my dad questions kind of separately and then get them together and, you know, kind of quiz them and see who remembered what which way. But it felt even a little campy for me. I also thought I would have my mom maybe write some questions and I'd ask my dad. My dad has some questions and I'd ask my mom, of course. My father nixed, that one. He was like, You know, I'm scared to ask your mother any questions I
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was like but Dad, I will
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be asking him, he says, but she would know they were from me. So that went out the window. So ultimately it ended up being me, doing one interview with my mom, one interview with my dad and then one interview with both of them together. And so, together with this introductory podcast, those four are my first set of four. After that, I'll be looking, to, give you guys a set off four each month, and each set of four will have its own kind of theme. What's been really fun is, as I've been saying to people, Hey, I'm starting a podcast, Asshole Parents. It's almost like people see it as a challenge. Oh, asshole. Parents, I gotta asshole Parent, it's so funny to me the way it really kind of perks people up. Even the one person says, Well, I mean, I wouldn't say my mom was an asshole, but I mean, she
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did do some
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asshole shit sometimes. Exactly, exactly. And then even another girlfriend who responded. Yeah, my mom was an asshole, but still with She was with me, and I thought all of those comments were really telling. You know, just because your parents are a asshole doesn't mean that you don't love him doesn't mean you wouldn't miss him. Doesn't mean that there is no good qualities about them. But there's still some stuff, and anyone who's been to therapy you've been involved with transformation and things like that. You know that everything really ultimately goes back to your parents and things that they taught you and things that you learn from them, even when it is not overtly traumatic. And though that is some people's lives not my life, but notwithstanding even my trauma, eh? So to speak was caused by my parents. And ah, lot of the ways that I interact react with world are based on that. And so that's why with some humor and they'll be light conversation there will be deep conversation. We will be talking a lot about divorce and parenting and how it is that, as individuals we turned into the people we are because of our parents. And most importantly, the idea is to be empowered and inspired to identify those patterns in your own life and then make a change, because that's how it works. First we have to identify the problem, and then we can do something different about it. It doesn't mean necessarily that the change is gonna happen overnight, but it absolutely cannot happen if we do not acknowledge it as something that needs to change. If we don't acknowledge it is something that is not setting us up to live our best lives to be our best Selves. And so with that, welcome to
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asshole parents, Hooo what you can expect
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from this show really, like I said, is light too deep conversation. Most of the time. It won't just be me talking The idea is that I will have guests on here interviewing them, listening to them in their stories about how they became who they were based on their parents. There are a lot of decisions that we make and choices that we make in life. And so quite a few people I have jumped in my mind already that I'd like to talk to about this topic and so out to me. Ah, Christian family, Esquire. You can reach me at Christian at Christian family law dot com. You can find us on. Linked in. We're divorced. Answer the same on Twitter. The same on face book. So all the places, um, we
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may have a different name on instagram.
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I'll check into that as well, you know? Yeah, just So. There you go. Just let me know. Messenger me. If this is something you'd be interested in, I'm not big enough yet to have, like, a real application process or anything. Just a If you're interested, let me know. And let's talk about it. So that is that you will see from the way that I am talking here that I am 100% unscripted. One day we'll make a determination if that's really the best way that I should be going forward. But right
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now this is the way I'm doing it.
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And I thank, my dear friend Kwamie Christian, Esquire of the Negotiate Anything podcast for giving me the advice to just start now. Because if I'm waiting for everything to be perfect, to begin a podcast, it will never happen because perfect never happens. Every single episode that I record these are his words is practice. It's always practice. Everything we do is practice, and that definitely gave me the confidence to just come forward to start talking to you guys right now, even though I don't have the bumper music and I don't have the correct intro. And again, I don't even necessarily have a 100% of a format yet for the show. I just know there's a lot of information I want you guys to learn. So what else, um, why should you even listen to me right? Like, why listen to Christian family Esquire? I do have about 20 years of experience as a divorce lawyer. Now I do things divorce and adoption. I did a Ted talk. I'm a giver of Ted talks November the 15th in 2019 in Columbus, Ohio, for a Spark. My topic was real. Talk about divorce, because again, I am all things divorced. I also ran, actually hasn't endorsed Candidate for the Domestic and Juvenile Court in Franklin County, Ohio, did that in 2010. What's the most interesting thing I think, is that I have been delivering for the last few years a two-hour workshop called co parenting tools to make it work. And in that workshop, the point was really to teach parents how to interact the way I felt like my parents interacted in a way to give me the best opportunity to have the best relationship possible with both of them. And the testament to that is the fact that they both live with me and are able to live with one another. That is a testament to the fact that it can work. And so that was always the angle. I was coming at when I was teaching the co parenting workshop because even though I had been divorced before, there were no Children from that divorce and I was into my second marriage with Children, but we were still married. And so I was giving the advice, um, as things that I hadn't lived through as the parent giving advice, really, from the stories I had heard from my parents and from what I experienced as a child. So now the joke's on me because now I am a divorced person with kids and, man, can I tell you he is an asshole? Oh, my God. And so I really want it to be this thing that my parents had. But it's not that. But I am, of course, living daily. The information that I gave other people I hate to give information and then dog on it. I now have to follow my own advice because that is the current situation. It's things like this. Um, he's got a pretty regular schedule alternating weekends, midweek overnight, however, he sometimes doesn't get them on his time, or he feels like he needs to be talking to the kids on my
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time. And I don't believe
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in my time, your time kind of a life. But it's, um, with him is like a form of abuse, and I've seen this in other divorces. When I've been doing and I'm like, What do you mean? But the parents really can use the phone abusively. Do I allow him to call here when? Periodically, What he's saying to my kids makes them cry. Am I doing the right thing by not limiting his contact? When that's what happens, am I doing the wrong thing by continuing to expose them to their father's kind of erratic behavior? These air rule life questions that I'm living But I have decided, and I made 100% commitment to follow the advice that I would give, which is that his relationship with this kid's is his relationship to define. If he wants to be around them, if he wants to get them, it is not my place to stop it. If he wants to call them, if he wants to communicate with them, it is not my place to stop it. What he is saying to them, how he is being around them. He is the one that is defining their relationship. They love their dad, And yes, he is definitely screwing them up in some ways. But aren't I? Didn't my parents screw me up. Just because I'm able to look at him and see his obviously asshole characteristics doesn't mean that I don't have my own. I've met my parents, and if they raised me and they are who they are and I know it because I live with them, there's a really good chance that will I have my own asshole tendencies. And so here we are people. That's
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kind of one of the
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topics that will come up. We'll talk about moving forward after divorce, co parenting after divorce and again always pivoting our lives when we recognize and except how we are, who we are based on who our parents are. I hope that makes sense. There's just so much really to say. But, um, this really is just the introduction episode just to let you know that, hey, the episodes are coming. The next three I have guests again, right ones with my mom, once with my dad wonders with both of them together, and I really do hope that you find my parents is entertaining as I find them. I am very impressed at how vulnerable I feel like they both got, at least on their individual recordings on and really sharing true and honest things that even got a little roll in the one with the two of them together, which I
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kind of
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question, because if you'd
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have been there looking at their
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body language, okay. Like, it was like a picture of people getting divorced, you know, they're both in the chairs, really kind of turned away from each other. My mother was on her phone the whole time. I really should have called her on the head, But I was just, you know, kind of letting it go
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because it is still
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a light show. And they were kind enough to be my guests. And, you know, it wasn't no sense of making it messy the first time. I'm
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not to say that I might not have him back at some other time.
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So there was that, um, definitely listen to the entire Siri used to get a kick out of it again. If you have ideas, if you have thoughts, if anything touches you or makes you chuckle anything, please definitely leave some kind of a comment about it wherever you can, um, share the podcast with anyone who you think might be interested. I want
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to say that's kind of all there is to say in
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this introductory episode. So I'm not gonna hold you guys for any unnecessary amount of time. I am Christian family Esquire, and this is the end of the very first episode of as Whole Parents with Christian Family Best Squire. Thank you so much for listening. And again, if you're interested in more information about me and things that I say, check me out on the Internet. Question. Christian family, Esquire. You can find me on Facebook. I'm divorced. Answer. Twitter Divorce Answer. Instagram. I
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think I'm divorced. Answer. But just
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Yeah, check me out out there. Follow me. Watch my little Facebook live videos. I think everything is public. Check out my Ted talk. Definitely. Check out the Ted talk. Real talk about divorce. I can't have enough views on that. And I really
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am going to say goodbye. Goodbye