Partnered with a Survivor: David Mandel and Ruth Stearns Mandel  Podcast Artwork Image

Partnered with a Survivor: David Mandel and Ruth Stearns Mandel

Ruth Stearns Mandel & David Mandel

These podcasts are a reflection of Ruth & David’s on-going conversations which are both intimate and professional and touch on complex topics like how systems fail victims and children, how victims experience those systems, and how children are impacted by those failures. Their discussions delve into how society views masculinity and violence, and how intersectionalities such as cultural beliefs, religious beliefs and unique vulnerabilities impact how we respond to abuse and violence. These far-ranging discussions offer an insider look into how we navigate the world as professionals, as parents and as partners. During these podcasts, David & Ruth challenge the notions which keep all us from moving forward collectively as systems, as cultures and as families into safety, nurturance and healing.Note: Some of the topics discussed in the episodes are deeply personal and sensitive, which may be difficult for some people. We occasionally use mature language. We often use gender pronouns like “he” when discussing perpetrators and “she” for victims. While both and men and women can be abusive and controlling, and domestic abuse happens in straight and same-sex relationships, the most common situation, when it comes to coercive control, is a male perpetrator and a female victim. Men's abuse toward women is more closely associated with physical injury, fear and control. Similarly, very different expectations of men and women as parents and the focus of Safe & Together on children in the context of domestic abuse makes it impossible to make generic references to gender when it comes to parenting. The Model, through its behavioral focus on patterns of behavior, is useful in identifying and responding to abuse in all situations including same-sex couples and women's use of violence. We think our listeners are sophisticated enough to understand these distinctions.

Recent Episodes

Episode 17: Choose to Change: Your Behavior, Your Choice’: A new community-based men’s behavior change toolkit June 18, 2020 Episode artwork Episode 16: Family and Friends Guide: How to be an ally to a loved one who is being abused May 04, 2020 Episode artwork Episode 15: Coercive Control, Entrapment & Isolation: An interview with Luke & Ryan HartApril 25, 2020 Episode artwork Episode 14: Caring for self while caring for others: An interview with Laura van Dernoot LipksyApril 01, 2020 Episode artwork Episode 13: Mapping domestic violence perpetrator's use of COVID-19 pandemic to increase coercive controlMarch 24, 2020 Episode artwork Episode 12: COVID-19: Helping families impacted by domestic abuse in a time of crisis March 20, 2020 Episode artwork Episode 11: Getting Inside the Mind of Men who Use Violence March 15, 2020 Episode artwork Episode 10: Lived Experience Episode with Ryan Hart and the Y Change Team, Berry StreetFebruary 27, 2020 Episode artwork Episode 9: "My daughter is being abused and I don't know what to say:" The friends and family episodeFebruary 21, 2020 Episode artwork Episode 8: Male Parental Development and how Father's Parenting Choices Matter February 09, 2020 Episode artwork Episode 7: Torture Tactics, How Coercive Control is Similar to Torture in its Methods and Impact on Victims February 06, 2020 Episode artwork Episode 6: Gender, Power Dynamics and AbuseFebruary 05, 2020 Episode artwork Episode 5: Professional Safety & Trauma January 30, 2020 Episode artwork Episode 4: Gender Double Standards January 23, 2020 Episode artwork Episode 3: Language and professional terms which cover up realities of abuse January 15, 2020 Episode artwork Episode 2: Victim BlamingJanuary 13, 2020 Episode artwork Episode 1: Coercive Control and ConsentJanuary 12, 2020 Episode artwork