Partnered with a Survivor: David Mandel and Ruth Reymundo Mandel
Partnered with a Survivor is a professional-focused podcast created and produced by Ruth Reymundo and hosted by the Safe & Together Institute. What began as intimate conversations between Ruth and David Mandel—founder of the Institute and creator of the Safe & Together Model—about violence, relationships, abuse, and the systems that respond to them has grown into a global conversation about systems and culture change.
Hosted by Ruth and co-hosted by David, the podcast features in-depth, professionally grounded discussions about how institutions respond to domestic abuse, gender-based violence, and child maltreatment. Many episodes also feature global leaders working across fields such as child safety, men and masculinity, perpetrator accountability, fatherhood, and partnering with survivors.
Together, these conversations examine how systems often fail adult and child survivors, how societal narratives about masculinity and violence shape professional practice, and how intersectional realities—including cultural and religious beliefs, racialised identities, LGBTQ+ experiences, immigration status, disability, and other structural vulnerabilities—shape responses to abuse and violence.
The podcast offers an insider lens into how professionals navigate systems not only as practitioners, but also as parents and partners. Through candid dialogue and critical reflection, Ruth and David challenge the assumptions and structures that limit meaningful accountability, safety, and healing. The goal is collective movement across systems, cultures, and families toward greater safety, nurturance, and sustained change.
Disclaimer: Episodes contain sensitive topics and occasional mature language that may be difficult for some listeners. The views and opinions expressed by podcast guests are their own and do not necessarily reflect those of the Safe & Together Institute or its staff.
Partnered with a Survivor: David Mandel and Ruth Reymundo Mandel
Season 1 Episode 8: Male Parental Development and How Fathers’ Parenting Choices Matter
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In this episode, Ruth and David start their Sunday morning with a discussion of male parental development, a concept that David coined to help professionals work more effectively with men and families. In many ways, societies fail in how we prepare boys to be parents. While girls' education and preparation for parenting may start with her first doll, our first discussion with boys about parenting usually comes much later and often is focused on how to avoid unwanted pregnancy.
How does our failure to address boys and men as a vital part of nurturing children harm men and families? How does this cultural blindness to the impact of men's behaviors—both positive and negative—affect the safety and nurturance of children?
The conversation covers numerous topics including research on the "mothering center" in the brain, the need for equal assessment of parenting across same-sex and heterosexual relationships, and the relevance of better work with fathers for women and children. David speaks directly to men around how to reflect on their preparation to be a father and provides tips for professionals about how to engage males better around fatherhood. Ruth speaks to how stereotypes around men as violent are harmful to men, women, and children.
Now available! Mapping the Perpetrator’s Pattern: A Practitioner’s Tool for Improving Assessment, Intervention, and Outcomes The web-based Perpetrator Pattern Mapping Tool is a virtual practice tool for improving assessment, intervention, and outcomes through a perpetrator pattern-based approach. The tool allows practitioners to apply the Model’s critical concepts and principles to their current case load in real
Check out David Mandel's new book Stop Blaming Mothers and Ignoring Fathers: How to Transform the Way We Keep Children Safe from Domestic Violence.
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