Message from the Director- The Nudge

In this episode, we reflect on Andrej Lah's June 2026 Message from the Director, "The Nudge" 

Share your thoughts about "The Nudge" on our blog!

To read more Messages from the Director, along with helpful resources, updates, and support, sign up for our monthly e-newsletter. 

 Do you have a topic you'd like us to discuss? Please email us at podcast@clecem.org!

Please feel free to "Connect With Us" via our website at www.clecem.org.

Follow us on:
Facebook: @catholiccemeteriesassociation
Twitter: @CLECatholicCems
Instagram: @clecatholiccems
Blog:  @clevelandcatholiccemeteries
Podcast: "CCAirwaves" on your favorite streaming platform!

Transcript

Welcome And The Nudge

SPEAKER_01 0:29

Hello, everyone, and welcome back to CC Airwaves. My name is Paige Matillo, and today we're going to be reflecting on another message from the director. This one was published recently in June 2026, and it is titled The Nudge. Nudge, to touch or gently push. Each of us knows what it's like to feel that slight sensation that gently moves us in a particular direction. Some call it a gut feeling, others might call it intuition. I see it as God's gentle guidance. God formed us for this world to live for a purpose, and your station in life does not matter because each of us can impact the life of another. God does not

Intuition As God’s Gentle Guidance

SPEAKER_01 1:10

ask us to change the world, but to love him and each other. A smile at the right time can change the trajectory of a person's life. How often do we find ourselves following his guiding hand? And after we find ourselves on the other side of the situation, we understand the nudge. So many do not believe that there is a God who involves himself in our lives. And for them, I pray that one day they understand how he is involved. Some will look at me and laugh because they believe I see this bearded old man in the sky telling me to make a right or left turn. All I can say is that for people of faith, we know that is not how it works. And we also know not to presume to understand the extent of his power. We sent Jesus to save the world. He sent Jesus to save the world, and on the third day, after a brutal death, raised our Savior from the dead to prove to us his love. Why is it so hard to believe that God knows each of us and expresses his love for us every day? I have been asked where God is with all the suffering in the world. Why does he allow people to die in wars, in places where there is famine, or simply at the hands of pure evil? I simply remind the Inquisitor that he is there too. When members of my family were being tortured and killed in ways that are beyond description, they prayed for God's mercy and he was there. When the brutality of others left them laying in pits, slowly dying, they prayed for God's mercy and he brought them peace. They understood that God was there and that Jesus was their path. I have always been amazed at the unimaginable horror these people experienced, and yet their faith in Jesus

Where God Is In Suffering

SPEAKER_01 2:50

was absolute. Despite everything they were subjected to, they found peace, and that is the true power of faith in God and in the sun. I was talking to my daughter about my new grandson, and a cardinal appeared in my window at work. And of course, the two of us immediately concluded it was a message from heaven. After I hung up the phone, it rang, and the caller number and caller were unknown to me. So I usually let those calls go to voicemail. A feeling came to answer the call, and it was Brian, whose eight-year-old little girl recently died, and he had a question. It was not long before I asked about his daughter and her death. Soon the conversation turned to faith in God and our relationship with Jesus. We talked about the path toward healing and acceptance. The pain does not go away, nor does the anger. But faith in God allows us to accept life, and trusting in Jesus helps with the pain. The call ended with both of us agreeing that neither of us had expected the conversation, but for both of us, it was clear that God set it in motion. The nudge is not about some grandiose message from heaven, but about a father in pain who needs someone to talk to, and a new grandfather offering some kind words and an absolute belief that faith in Jesus is the path. We shared a few precious moments and a few tears, and I can only conclude that his little girl interceded and asked for God to give her daddy a nudge. God does not demand anything of us because free will is ours, and in the end, we choose to be part of his kingdom or not. Love God above all else, and thy neighbor is thyself, and don't ever ignore the nudge. So now I am here with Andre La, who wrote the nudge, and I would just love to know why you chose that topic for June.

A Cardinal And A Grieving Father

SPEAKER_01 4:56

And it comes from the heart.

SPEAKER_02 4:57

And and well, and they do. I mean, I I I I sp I take the time to think about, you know, what inspires um this month's piece. And you know, I I I try to find something that's unique and original, um, and something that you know that will give people hope. Um two weeks ago I spoke with a woman whose um son had died, he was 58 years old. And at the end of the conversation, I mean we we talked for a while, and she was obviously lonely. Um and uh at the end of the conversation she was in tears, and I I found that to be uh again, uh what a privilege it is to have someone share them with you. And um we solved her problem. And again, it was, you know, is that all part of that nudge? Or or maybe the um the lady I talked to the other day whose um two stillborn uh brothers back in the 50s. It's a long story and it's a hurtful one. Um but it set in motion a series of events that will lead to what I hope will be a healing uh for her and her family and to erase, you know, decades of of pain that was caused by a stupid comment made by someone who didn't really understand God, um, even though they wore a habit and um you know professed their their love of God. Um but love of God means also to love your fellow man and to love the person that's there in your care. Um you know, to to provide that person or to show that person God's mercy. It's it's all part of that. The it's all part of that nudge. So here I was given an opportunity um to undo something that happened a long time ago. May not to undo it, but really to to bring some healing to it. Is that not a nudge? Did not God set something in motion? Because I didn't have to get involved. Um, you know, I was talking to our FSR out at Holy Cross and he asked me a couple questions. I said, yeah, do, you know, whatever you think. I mean, I'll I'll whatever your your call is, I'll I'll back you. Um well he must have talked to the to the lady and and she ultimately caused called me. And I could I could feel the tension in her voice because, you know, well, are are you the director? Are you the one that's gonna make the decision here? And and um and uh you know, you you could you could feel that sense of tension because you know, in some people's experiences, they they usually find uh the person on the other end of the phone is your typical office bureaucrat that doesn't have a sense of of care or mercy or or doesn't really um have any compassion for the person that they're talking to. And I think that's you know, I mean there's a lot of careers where that's acceptable. And, you know, of course you're running a business, you're doing that, you're doing that. You you have to be very, you know, focused on um, you know, building and growing the value of your business. This is different here. Uh yeah, we're there's a business side to the cemetery, but but there has to be that side that is merciful, that is driven by the mission, that is that is that never forgets that this is a Catholic cemetery, and that people trust us with their loved ones because

Free Will And Loving Your Neighbor

SPEAKER_02 8:20

they believe that it is it is part of the church and part of their faith. And and so in that moment, in that in that answering that call, um, you know, we're gonna set in motion a series of events that will bring peace. Just like when I talked to Brian, uh, he was angry and he needed he needed to vent and he needed to talk to someone, and I happened to pick up the phone. Um I don't know. Again, people look at me and and I and I had somebody actually say that to me, oh, like there's this bearded, gray, you know, old bearded guy in the sky telling you where to go. No, but it's that feeling that you get that God sets things in motion. And again, I I don't understand people who really don't, well, I why, you know, well, sure, God knows seven billion of us or eight billion, whatever the number is today. Um yeah, he does. And why would you presume that you know you understand the true nature of his power, that you know, the extent of it? And why can't he understand or have be a part of each of our of

Why Andre Wrote The Nudge

SPEAKER_02 9:20

our lives? I mean, each of us as individuals impact somebody every day. Do we do we look and wave and smile at somebody which brightens their day? Do we stop and help somebody change a tire? Do we see someone you know on the side of the road? Uh do we see you know someone sitting there and and all broken and uh and do we say something? Um Yeah, you know, some of us do. And in that moment, you know, we allowed the nudge to guide us toward uh helping someone through a situation. And sometimes all it is is a smile or hey, can I, you know, can I help you? Or, you know, sure, you make a left turn over there and you head that way. Is it that simple? You know, I don't know how how the extent of it. What I do know is that God is involved in every aspect of our lives, and I can't, you know, otherwise, how do you explain those little things that happen that set in motion a series of events that ultimately lead to something really good, like with Brian or with this lady and her two brothers that were stillborn, um, and countless others. I can't tell you how many times I've had these conversations. Um and uh and and it seems like every time there's I can point to a set of circumstances that led me to that uh decision. Um you know, and and I do believe that God is involved in every aspect of our lives. You can laugh at me, you can think I'm crazy, you can think whatever you like, but that's just that's that's the way I see it. And then after 26 years of of being involved with burying people and their grieving families and the the the you know the extended grief, um the you know, children that grieve, spouses, parents, um, you really learn a lot about not only humanity, but you also learn a lot about those nudges that that that happen and you hear them and you and you and you can't extrapolate from the information that you're being provided in a conversation with someone on the phone that, oh my God, it is so obvious that there was some godly intervention that that brought you to some s some sense of peace, or to guide you to where you can find some peace. You know, I'm not saying that that um it eliminates the the anger, it eliminates the the grief, the sorrow, um, but uh what I am saying is there is a path toward peace. It's like my friend driving down the road um upset, y just angry

Mercy In Cemetery Work

SPEAKER_02 12:00

at his that his four-year-old son had been tragically killed, and uh all of a sudden he yells at God and he says, I give it all to you. And in that and and he described it in that moment, it was just this sense of uh overwhelming peace that came upon him and he felt a relief. It didn't take away it didn't take away the pain of losing his son. It certainly certainly didn't eliminate um the the grief and the anguish and the and the you know the wise but it also came with a sense of relief that it's okay, that you know, his son is is is with God and that someday he will see his son again. And I guess that's the key, is it it leads us to the nudge is really understanding and believing that there is a God that loves us, there is a God that involves himself in our lives, there is a God that sent his son to conquer death. And and you know how that all works as far as God is concerned, why did he do this? Why did he do that? I don't know, I you know, those answers I don't have. I'll I I guess I'll have them one day. Um, or will I care? Because that's another thing that I wonder sometimes. When we when we do find ourselves standing before God, do all those things that mattered here matter anymore? Um or do we see our family and we have we have almost like a uh an epiphany or a realization of, oh, that you know, it all makes sense now and we don't care anymore because we're we're in paradise, you know, if we if we earn that uh if we earn the path through paradise. You know, there's always there's always talk about that other place, but we don't like to go there. I don't see I don't see the the uh you know I don't see the devil sending nudges to us to do good things for other people.

SPEAKER_01 14:04

So uh can you think of another time in your life when you fell to nudge that completely changed the course of your day?

SPEAKER_02 14:12

The day or maybe your life. Oh my gosh. You know. I can look back through so many episodes of my life, and I do. I I just look back and you know, it's it the benefit of age is hindsight. When you can look back and realize, and that's probably why, you know, I write some of this stuff now, because it's like you look back and you're like, oh, yeah, that makes sense now. At that moment, you you know, you're not, you're just you're just walking along, you're trying to get your career off the ground, you're you know, you're you're um you're just getting started, and the next thing you know, you you find yourself in a place where, you know, oh, is that what that's all about? It's like, you know, when you're walking back from a uh a meeting and you're a little distraught, you're you know, things maybe could have gone a little bit awry, and you walk into the uh the building where your office is at and you look and there's a light on. It's it's Friday afternoon late, it's like five o'clock, and um

Small Acts That Shift A Day

SPEAKER_02 15:15

the priest that you work for is sitting there in his office, and he's never there on a Friday night. Um he's got somewhere to go later on, but so he's sitting there reading his daily office, and and you walk down the hall, and you you know, you got a minute and you sit down and you start talking, and it's you you walk out of there and you just unloaded what you know a lot, and and you you realize that why was he there? What because he's never there at that time. And and did God set that in motion to bring me some peace at that moment in my life. And I think if we all take a moment and just and just really reflect on that, on those situations where we needed God's direct involvement. We needed to come in him and to come in and say, hey, this is this is what what I'm sending into in setting in motion. You know, that I think of that moment. So I'm walking in the hallway and down the hall, I looked down the hall, and his uh, you know, Father's light is on. And rather than walking straight toward my office, I made a right-hand turn to his office. I looked in, there he was sitting there reading his uh his daily. So the every uh religious and and priest, they have a daily um they read their daily office. So it's a set of daily prayers and that they that they're it's kind of required to read. Um I think most do it because it's uh it's a dedication. And it's it's kind of cool. Um I tried it for a while and uh and it was really kind of neat. And and so him sitting there at that moment, just when I needed him to be there more than anything. Are you gonna sit here and tell me that it was coincidence that he happened to be there on a Friday evening when he's never there? And he was there when I needed to unload and and really you know get some guidance and some help, and and he was there. And not only that, he was a priest. It's kind of, you know, wow. Um so yeah, I mean, and and any of us can look at that and say, I mean, Paige, you could look at your own life. And and you know, as young as you are, you've got moments where you can say, Oh, yeah, it makes sense now to me if if you allow yourself to accept that there's more than just circumstantial situations that arise, that maybe there is this power that sets things in motion. It's it and again, that moment, I could have made a I could have gone, I could have looked down, saw the light on, and and kept walking and and just dealt with it myself. Or God said, Hey, come this way and I'll bring you some peace. It happened with my uh when when when my son was born, and he was born with a birth defect, and I was suffering, you know, I was grieving, and

Grief, Anger, And A Path To Peace

SPEAKER_02 18:10

and somehow I ended up in church that day and and saw someone with a very similar birth defect, and he was happy. And he was in his 80s. And so was God telling me that life that it'll be okay? Sure, I wasn't planning on go to church that evening, and I got guilted into it by my sister because it was a thing. So, you know, we we usually went on Sundays. This was a Saturday vigil mass, and it was for a special thing, and wasn't dressed for church, but you know, and you don't want to go to St. Vitus unless you're dressed properly. So, you know, showing up in shorts and a t-shirt wasn't a wasn't a thing. But had I not gone, I would have I would have never had this story to tell, nor would have I had the peace that it it it it offered me.

SPEAKER_01 18:55

So I think that's the big distinction is that a nudge, God doesn't force us to do anything. You're correct. We have the free will to make the choices ourselves. And so he didn't force you to go there. I mean your sister did.

SPEAKER_00 19:11

But you had the free will to say no, and you followed the nudge.

SPEAKER_02 19:16

I guess you know the the free God's free will is a little bit easier to say no to than my sister, but um but he um but again it and and how many of these those moments do we all have? And and for those of you who are who refuse to look at them as as just those little nudges that God sends into into your life, that's okay. I mean um you know, I may be completely wrong. Maybe it is just coincidence, maybe it is just a uh a strange set of circumstances that that leads, you know, to me finding a key that uh that maybe have saved a life. Or, you know, when you when you help somebody or go buy them dinner and it changes their life. When you do those those things, when you answer a phone call and it brings uh a grieving father some peace. Or when you uh when you help uh you know when you help you know Linda dealing with her 16-year-old daughter that led to tears. And and uh you know, I just being here at the cemetery, this was not my career. You know, I I joke with my brother-in-law, he's a partner at a large law firm, and and I, you know, when I was in law school and I worked for a judge, I you know, I got out, worked for a couple of judges, my career path was set. I was gonna, you know, maybe go to the prosecutor's office and um be a partner in a law firm and you know, so I kind of look at his career and I mean that was the career, that's your dream career, you know. And um somehow through a very strange set of circumstances, I found out about a job in the legal office of the diocese. And I ended up, you know, there. Uh and and another and and then I can point to all kinds of little nudges that guided me to the cemetery and to be here. Is this where God wanted me? I yeah, I guess I I think he did. Um I believe that he is, you know, he's this is you know, you you you you have that idea that you're gonna change the world, and he doesn't ask you to change the world. He just asks you to, you know, just take care of my take care of the things that I ask you to take care of. And it I know

Hindsight And Recognizing Patterns

SPEAKER_02 21:35

it's only a little small little pebble in the in the uh or a little grain of sand in the in the on the beach of life. And um but it's when you really think about the impact that we can have on another life. And you know, the simplest of us, I think of I think of, you know, whether whether you're sweeping floors somewhere, I think of you know, I think of the impact that Eddie has on people. Eddie I mean what would you say? You know, he's I mean he probably um he's clearly development developmentally disabled. I've been we've been friends since we were I mean he's five months older than me so he's born in May. And um you know and he just he he shows such love to people and he really has I mean of all of us he is probably you know he he lives his life very simply he has a you know his um what third fourth you know like a four year old a five year old sometimes in in the way he processes things and and yet um the love he shows us all and and the impact that he has I mean I can tell you the impact that he has on me and and I think to myself you know was that a little bit of a nudge for him to be part of my life for him to have taught me um the things that I've learned from from him and he's probably been one of my greatest teachers uh and you think you know how could that be possible he's part he's one of God's children and God puts him in in in our lives and then we are given the choice to love him and to and you know people like you know like Eddie or or people like uh that have similar disabilities um he gives he when Eddie was born was was that was nature Eddie is a child of God the rest of his life is is is how we how how we are with him and how he uh impacts us and and I don't know that he realizes uh the extent of the impact that he has and I think of Eddie because he's just upstairs you know sweeping and stuff yeah and um I think of I think of him often because of what he's done for me and how much of a better person he has made me and so is that a nudge is that part of God's plan um I don't know that Eddie's disability is part of God's plan that's nature but then how he lives his life and how he impacts us that's God's plan. My son's birth defect was not God. God didn't say okay you know Nicholas you are now going to have a birth defect and you are going to you know this is going to be a struggle for you and this and that. No no no that's not it that's nature that's life that's living living is is filled with tragedy you know people people you know die people are in accidents people people do cruel things to others you hear about all these people being murdered you hear about an a shooter here at this and then in and out burger and you read about the tragedy of this young girl this 23 year old young and young girl that was slain and you think to yourself oh my God how could these tragedies tragedies are part of life they just are we die we go through bad things we suffer through through tough times it it's just the way it is that's that's our earthly life but our relationship with God allows us to sustain ourselves it it it it gives us that resilience that allows us to go through those moments and to survive them. And you know like I said I I I know people who have gone through things that you can't even begin to imagine. I mean imagine sitting there talking to a guy who literally climbed out of a pit of death and and was actually a happy guy. And all the things that he suffered through and all the other things I mean my grandfather talked himself out of a German firing squad. Who does I think he's probably the only man that ever walked away from one and he literally talked talked his way out of

Tragedy, Nature, And Resilience

SPEAKER_02 25:55

one um and it's I mean that's another it's a long story but again that that moment set in motion a whole series of events that led to me sitting here with you right now. So was that not was there not a nudge in there somehow was it the was the German officer that gave him his life was that was he not nudged in some way by God to just say you know what that this is this one this is I'm giving you I'm giving you Mr. German officer the opportunity to do the right thing. If you send him back out to sh and to have him executed hey I I can't stop you from doing that but I have the opportunity but I encourage you not to so God can't God's not going to come in here and smite the evil person that's doing something evil. No that evil exists evil's part of our world there's no way around it um bad things happen and there's no way around it. But when you believe in God I I I so there's that I know I talk about this scene sometimes Dean Cain talking to his uh elderly mom in a nursing home she's got Alzheimer's it that's really not about that but it's more about how we how you wonder I I I've been thinking sometimes because life right now has been pretty nice. It's been pretty good you know there's yeah you're dealing with the stuff you're dealing with you know the day-to-days and so forth and so on but you know and then I but then I really reflect on it and it's like you know what we've had pretty some some pretty tough things happen you know from whether it's death whether it's this but then I I guess because I believe that there is this amazing God that has a a direct involvement in my life that that guides me and that through Christ the path to heaven is real and it is established I don't know maybe it's just it I find myself it's much easier to deal with the day-to-day things that life hands you the the difficulties the the suffering the tragedies the this and that when you allow yourself to just accept that there is a God that Jesus lived Jesus died Jesus rose and that we honor him by you know talking about how he impacts our lives so when you have faith when you sit in a pew on Sunday and this is not I'm not preaching about going to church or whatever but for me I'm just telling you what what it does for me sitting in that pew allows me that moment to release all of those things and you focus on the next week and the next day and and how am I going to impact other people's lives so you know so then when I when I think about faith gives you a certain resilience that allows you to to to live through the things that life throws at you and if you don't have that faith it's just not that life's life is just tragic whether you have it or not life is difficult whether you have it or not life is joyful whether you have faith or not. So there's all those wonderful things about life that impact each of us. The difference is I think you survive the the difficulties better and you enjoy the good times more

Closing Thoughts And Where To Follow

SPEAKER_02 29:25

when you allow God and Jesus and the Holy Spirit to be part of it. So there you go. That's the nudge.

SPEAKER_01 29:33

I think that is a perfect ending to the podcast. Thank you so much Andre for joining us today and thank you for our listeners for listening you can follow us on CC Airwaves on all our social media and until next time