Today we explore how to create change from a place of abundance. How to look at changing your relationship with alcohol as gaining more, rather than loosing. Gaining more of you, your inner light and your unique expression. The concept of lack and poverty is a construct created by systems that power over. Life it's self is innately abundant, and so are you!
Schedule your free alignment session HERE!
Transform your relationship with alcohol by focusing on yourself. Discover how to fulfill your needs without alcohol's help. Understand your body's signals, leverage your emotions, and expand your desires for real, lasting pleasure.
Join "The Naturally Sober Woman" self-study course, where you'll learn everything I teach my clients in a compact, affordable, lifetime access package.
Transform your relationship with alcohol by focusing on yourself. Discover how to fulfill your needs without alcohol's help. Understand your body's signals, leverage your emotions, and expand your desires for real, lasting pleasure.
Join "The Naturally Sober Woman" self-study course, where you'll learn everything I teach my clients in a compact, affordable, lifetime access package.
Today we explore how to create change from a place of abundance. How to look at changing your relationship with alcohol as gaining more, rather than loosing. Gaining more of you, your inner light and your unique expression. The concept of lack and poverty is a construct created by systems that power over. Life it's self is innately abundant, and so are you!
Schedule your free alignment session HERE!
Transform your relationship with alcohol by focusing on yourself. Discover how to fulfill your needs without alcohol's help. Understand your body's signals, leverage your emotions, and expand your desires for real, lasting pleasure.
Join "The Naturally Sober Woman" self-study course, where you'll learn everything I teach my clients in a compact, affordable, lifetime access package.
Transform your relationship with alcohol by focusing on yourself. Discover how to fulfill your needs without alcohol's help. Understand your body's signals, leverage your emotions, and expand your desires for real, lasting pleasure.
Join "The Naturally Sober Woman" self-study course, where you'll learn everything I teach my clients in a compact, affordable, lifetime access package.
Good morning, my beautiful listeners it is Mary Wagstaff, thank you so much for being here. I wanted to pop on briefly today to really say hi, and to let you know that no matter how isolating or lonely things can feel at times, and you kind of feel like an island, that you are never truly alone, there is a beautiful process that happens here on the earth. Outside of the scene, right, the physical eyes of the human, that is always creating connection. And I woke up today, and I have so many thoughts and ideas from the moment that I popped my head off of my pillow, it's kind of crazy, that I decided I want to start sharing more with you. And in an effort to create more of a sense of community and camaraderie. Because when I started the podcast, it was probably I think it was February of this year. And so things were a little bit different than they are now. And I was just privy to the information last night that in our state in Oregon, the governor has created another kind of shutdown phase, because of you know, exposure of COVID and increasing cases. And all of that is to me completely neutral her decision. But what it does do is it does kind of shift, I believe the perception of the closeness we have, and in the physical way, you know, what she did was she shut down, you know, seating inside of restaurants. And so it's now takeout only. And I think that there's a few other services. I'm not engaging in any of that anyway, so it doesn't really affect me, but it does affect people's lives. And, you know, there's no judgment around that specifically. But my point is, is we're going in here in the Northern Hemisphere into the darker, darker season. And I really want to support you, because I know that if you are still drinking, that can kind of take you a little bit lower. So there's kind of high highs and low lows. And, you know, it's been being used now as a tool for you in some way to cope, to manage stress to not be bored to you know, this illusion that you're, you're not feeling quite alone. And I completely understand and I'm there with you for all of that. But there are alternative options. And if it's just listening to me, you know, knowing that there is someone kind of on the other end, and of course, everyone has different family dynamics, and so on and so forth. But I know for myself, personally, it's really been me and my son, and then Matthews at work when I'm not working. And I see my mom a little bit but I but I have been taking action. So instead of kind of, you know, just knowing what's out there, I take action to get on a call with someone face to face. Of course I have my clients that I talked to which is amazing and warming and all of the changes that they're making. I hold space for a sister circle around the full moon time. There's lots of virtual things going on that kind of create this other sense of warmth, but you have to believe before you take the action that it will make a difference and it does. So for example, I also just bought Yesterday, and it was very reasonable a pass to a festival called Bhakti Fest, which is kind of a Kundalini Yoga festival that happens. I believe in Joshua Tree, California every year, well, they decided to do kind of a little reunion online this weekend. And I had access to that through my newsletter I'm signed up for for one of my teachers. And so it's live performances, live yoga. And so it does give this different sense of being in community with people. And then we have our beautiful Mother Earth. So going out, getting bundled up, and just seeing the the bareness now of the trees, I mean, they're still there, right, they just don't have their leaves, there's so much beauty. And when we go out and we breathe the fresh air, it does change our nervous system, it creates positive chemicals in our brain and serotonin, and starts to shift the vibration on and in our magnetic field of how how we're showing up. So we create a creates more of a balance. So when we're just inside, and we're not getting any of that natural air, or we're not connecting with any of nature, and we're just kind of in front of the computer to all the time, there is a little bit of an imbalance there. So, you know, really taking responsibility for how you're curating what you're taking in. Because that is what you have control over right now is the things that you're seeing through your eyes, what you're listening to. And so there was kind of a big, you know, aha moment here in the states with the election and stuff. And, you know, my invitation is seeing what people can do in light of that. So, you know, we get wrapped up kind of in another person's story, but when we take the emphasis off of ourselves, and we just go out to be of service. So how can we do that also, this winter, how can we be of service. And this kind of ties back into the point that I wanted to talk about, which is creating more desire from a state of abundance. I believe that the concept of lack and poverty, even though people are experiencing lack of resources in the world, is a construct that has been created through the systems of power over models. Because when we look to those models, there is this ranking of value, which is just numbers on the screen. But when we look to the earth, and I talked about this in the last podcast, there is never a lack there is never a shortage. And this is so instilled in our culture that I've asked people, when you think about the earth and the world, what is abundant to you. And a lot of people really don't see the natural planet as a source of inspiration for abundance. Now, to me, it is proof that I will always live in an abundant world, because I have access to her. Regardless of the structures around me crumble, I trust and truly believe that I will always be okay in my I will always be provided for my basic needs. Now, if I have to make a house out of, you know, sticks, I have to do that. But when we tap into this place of abundance of what we have already, everything else becomes a bonus. So right now you're drinking because you think that there's something wrong, there's some way that you should be different, whether it's less stressed, whether it's happier, whether it's having more fun, some way whether you want to look at it as a positive or negative, you don't see that the natural way that things are, are okay. And you also don't, maybe you don't want to be stressed out. And that's totally normal. But you're not seeking other strategies for coping. And my invitation is that there are and you really have to tune into your own natural wisdom and the wisdom of the planet to know that it is available to you. So what I would love to offer for you today on this beautiful Saturday is to make a list of all of the things that you would want to have in your life that you already have. Now, there are So many things that we have in our spaces around us that we neglect. And we really take for granted. There are places in the world where people don't have running water, they don't have, you know, vessels to hold water, and they don't have books at their disposal. I mean, I can just go down to the library and get anything, I have tons of books in my house, I have plants, green plants growing in and around me everywhere. You know, I mean, all of these things that if I didn't have them, I would want them. So looking at the abundance of your life that already exists. And then tuning into the natural world, what about the natural world is always available to you? Water, beauty, air breath, I mean, if you're breathing, you have an abundance of air, and access to oxygen flowing in you. In gratitude doesn't always mean that you can't experience grief or sadness. I know that there's times where I have so much that I can create a sense of guilt, for feeling. Like there's something you know, for just basically not feeling well, you know, if I'm going through my own emotional processing, and I and I can think, oh, man, how can I even feel this way because of all that I have. And that is not where I want you to go at all, I think in simple observation, of just seeing everything that you have. So in these moments where we're experiencing the depth of human emotion, you can just trust that this too shall pass that nothing has gone wrong. And nothing is being taken away from me in these moments when I'm experiencing emotion. In fact, I have the opportunity because I'm not fighting for my basic needs right now, I have the opportunity to be with myself. And so as long as your basic needs are being met, everything else is a bonus. And I'm sure that I've said that before on this podcast. And again, that doesn't mean that you should negate the way that you do feel. But it's an opportunity to see that nothing has gone wrong. And to honor any time inside of you, that you're feeling the need to process emotion. And I think that this kind of lack mentality also comes along with a fear of not drinking this, you know, fear of missing out somehow that if I make this decision today, then I might miss out on the best opportunity. And it's really just the way that the brain works, because it's so used to getting that reward at a specific time. And for specific instances when that's triggered in a specific way that it thinks that your basic needs are not being met out your brain right now considers alcohol, a basic need. And so when you kind of look at it from that perspective, it's like whoa, okay, we know this isn't true. We don't need alcohol to survive as human beings in any way, shape or form. So knowing that I can want something and not have it. And I'm choosing, you know, that's one of the biggest resistance to change is we think once we commit to change in any way, that we've now somehow lost power, but it's completely the opposite. You've gained so much freedom, because you're not sitting in indecision. So today, look at your abundance. And then look at the way in which you see not drinking as lack, what are you really going to be missing out on? And after you do this abundance journey from what you already have, offer yourself this. What would I be gaining? If alcohol were no longer in my way, and it could be vast right from money to health to more time alert. My brain is firing on such high cylinders. I don't know what that means, but my brain is firing so rapidly all the time. It's sometimes a little too much and I manage it and of course but um I am, I'm just thinking about things to teach on the podcast ways to improve my life to step outside of my limiting beliefs and limitations and fears. And that the contrast that I've gained from what I used to drink, I mean, I remember times, I was just talking to Matthew about this times where I couldn't really engage as much in a conversation about things that were important to me things that I was interested in. But I had just kind of gotten to this point of constantly being in this buzzy, dull, numb state. And then of course, if you're actually intoxicated, then you just get kind of sloppy, without shame. This is just in retrospect, so I can celebrate, you know, holy crap, my brain doesn't, it doesn't feel like it hurts to think, and I was a student, I've been a student my entire life. And so it was really that towards the end of desiring alcohol, where it just started to feel really limiting, where I was really not honoring the growth that I wanted. And I was really, you know, damaging my brain. I mean, the brain is very damaged from alcohol. And there's a lot of my life, I don't remember, a lot of long term memory that has been deleted or destroyed. And that's okay. I don't mean to go sit in memories anyway. So what will you be gaming, you know, more of on the other side of alcohol, and kind of get into a place of feeling more excited about changing your relationship to alcohol, rather than this deprivation, because I'm here to tell you that literally nothing, you're not taking anything away from your life except a beverage and a glass. And then you have to manage your emotions. And it really is as simple as that. But it's been one of those constructs and told to us and we've never been taught another way that it's so so challenging. And now, I understand that there are people that face different levels of dependency, depending on frequency, and duration. And there are also people that phase and different levels of adversity. So added stress could create more triggers. And so we have to see where those triggers are, and what can you mitigate? What can you look out into the world and decide that maybe my beliefs around the stress and these triggers are not true, maybe I think that I need things to be different than they are. But I'm actually living in abundance. And so maybe some of the triggers and the stress, and that adversity has been created through habitual patterning as well. So exploring all of this, and that's a lot of concepts kind of in one, but I woke up today, and I wanted to share something with you. And I am going to try to do, I'm not going to try I'm going to do I really try to coach around not trying, I am going to be delivering more podcasts, kind of from my heart to yours. And throughout these next few months, so that we can create more of a sense of community, you know that someone's here on the other end, completely understanding where you're at. And if you have any questions or things that you would like to hear on the podcast, so what I would like to do is just have shorter segments and then continue Wednesdays to be my actual weekly podcast. And then throughout the week, have you know, my inspirations what I'm doing, you know, whatever I'm waking up thinking about just kind of come to you a little bit more improv style. But if there is a question that you have something that is really challenging for you to face or something that you don't understand that I've talked about, please email me I would love to hear from you. This is how we create more community, even through the interwebs. I don't believe that there's just me over here talking to you. The the the relationship is symbiotic right without someone on the other end, and I'm just speaking to avoid, and it is my high honor to be able to create new content, to teach to inspire to let you know that you're not alone to hold space in this way, or you can get some inspiration and know that there is the possibility of living A life where alcohol is no longer in your way, and in a way that you choose, right? There's no rules. But when you start focusing on what you have control of in the moment, in the present moment, all of the little things from the past, they start to not be as important. Now you can still go back and, and face traumas and things like that. But what I have seen with myself, and what I see with my clients is they're focused on building their own competence in the present moment, taking control of their own life in the present moment, that those things that they thought were going to be a big issue, really start to fade in the background. It's really a beautiful process, because you can kind of banish those limiting beliefs of what may be a specific instance. You know, a way that that had power over you in some way, Mary at Mary Wagstaff coach.com, if you have any insights, and you would love to have me answer anything, because I'm going to be adding more episodes to the show, and I'm not sure exactly when they'll be out, but I'll figure that out this weekend. So just know that you can expect that I think that you're amazing, and that you are what creates the abundance in this world, you are it and the more uniquely expressed, your light is and the more it shines, the more access to abundance we all have. So when you change your relationship with alcohol, you are contributing to the world in ways that you don't even realize. And this is something to to also think about when you think about what would I be doing on the other side, just the simple fact of honoring who you are, is a gift to this world because this world needs the medicine that is uniquely you and however it shows up. Have a wonderful, beautiful weekend and I will talk to you soon. Bye