Why Growth Feels Like Failure (And What to Do When You Hit the Wall) #684

You may feel stuck right now. But the truth is you're probably just standing at the start line of a distance you've never run before.

In this video I break down why growth feels like failure, why feeling like an idiot during the learning process is actually proof you're doing it right, and the four pillars I'm using right now to level up my own identity.

You'll learn:

- Why you don't have a growth problem — you have an information gap

- The difference between You and You 2.0 (and how to close it)

- Why 44% of professional skills will be disrupted in the next year

- The 4 pillars: Education, Habits, Beliefs, and Emotional Control

- Why resistance isn't a sign to stop — it's a sign you're finally doing something that matters

- The permanent upgrade that no one can ever take away from you

If this hits a nerve, the next step is the Life Performance Scorecard. It's a free five-minute assessment that shows you exactly where you're winning, where you're leaking energy, and what to fix next across Strong Body, Calm Mind, Clear Purpose, and Confident Life.

Transcript

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The Start Line Feeling

Lachlan Stuart 0:00

You may feel stuck right now, but the truth is you're probably just standing at the start line of a distance that you've never run before. We all know how daunting that is. And you're doing what all of us do when the lungs start to burn. You're negotiating with yourself. You're trying to talk yourself into running a shorter route, or you're cutting the session early, or convincing yourself that good enough is fine for today. Don't let that get you. Most of us treat our struggles like they're a character flaw. We think I can't figure this out because I'm not smart enough. Or I just don't think I'm built for this. But the reality is, is you don't have a growth problem, you have an information gap.

From Failure To Information Gap

Lachlan Stuart 0:39

And this is something that I'm thinking about right now. There's a version of you, and let's call it U 2.0, who has already built the engine to handle this pace. The reason it feels so heavy right now is because you're failing. No one likes failing. And it's because you haven't finished putting in the miles required to become the person you need to be yet. Growth feels like you're failing, and I hate feeling like I'm failing. But every problem is just a signal. It's an indicator that your current fitness level for this specific task is out of date.

Skills Change Fast So Must You

Lachlan Stuart 1:12

The world is moving so fast, bloody fast. In fact, the World Economic Forum estimates that 44% of our professional skills are going to be disrupted by the next year. That's mind-blowing when you think about it. If you feel like you're struggling to keep your head above water, it's not because you're working your ass off for nothing. It's because the game changed and you haven't really read the new training plan yet. And I don't say that to scare you. I say it because it's something that I am experiencing in my own life right now. Whenever I learn something new, it makes me feel like a loser and a failure because I don't understand it yet. And I think in order to understand anything, you have to be able to teach it. To close the gap, you have to stop looking at your challenges as roadblocks and start looking at them as research, right? It's just the let's call it the base building that has to happen for you to level up to you to reach U 2.0. And when you realize that more data is going to help you figure out where the leak actually is, you can start doing what you need to do to close that gap. And I do want to be mindful that you don't get analysis by paralysis by overthinking things. But if you're trying to achieve something and there is a gap, you need to understand what has to happen to close that gap. Now don't get too caught up in the process of over-analyzing it, just get some roadmaps that you can then act, sorry, some actionable items that you can start implementing to get feedback.

Four Pillars Of Identity Growth

Lachlan Stuart 2:36

I've got four specific pillars that show you how to level up your identity, and this is what I'm using at the moment. First one, education. This is the what, right? People think we don't need to be educated because AI can do it all, but that's dangerous. You're outsourcing your own beliefs and your own ideas. You need the books, you need the research, you need the raw data, you need to learn. The second part is habits, and this is the how, the boring, repetitive stuff, the zone two work that turns information into a skill. Beliefs, there's the third part, and this is the why. It's the internal permission you give yourself to actually be the expert. And the fourth, emotional control, and this is the fuel. It's staying calm and not quitting when feeling like a complete idiot during the learning process. And I'm going through this right now. Most people are heavy on one of these and totally bankrupt in the other. So if you want to know exactly which pillar is holding you back, I've got a tool for you. Go take the life performance scorecard in the description, and it takes four minutes, and it is a great reality check that shows you exactly where your identity gap is. Do it now so you can stop guessing.

Resistance Shows Up After Clarity

Lachlan Stuart 3:45

But let's go back to the reality of all this resistance stuff. Now, even once you know what's missing, you're going to hit a wall. We always hit a wall. And it's like a 30-kilometer mark in a marathon where your mind starts screaming at you to stop. It's that resistance, and this is where most people turn around or most people start to walk. And I'm gonna be real with you. I'm feeling this

A Real Example Of Avoidance

Lachlan Stuart 4:08

right now. I've been diving into YouTube lately, and a topic that has been going really well on my social media is male loneliness. And I've been speaking from my own experiences and it's resonating with people. But now I'm trying to read the data and the deep research because I want to create more specific, more helpful content for people like yourself and to understand it myself. But the resistance is I keep feeling there is a lack of education. I haven't studied it enough to feel comfortable talking about it just off the cuff at a high level. And so my brain keeps saying, Oh mate, just make a different video. Do something easy, do something you understand. And it's funny because that's why I'm making this video right now to avoid the hard work of reading and listening to that other topic.

unknown 4:54

Fuck.

Lachlan Stuart 4:55

And that is the wall of the resistance in real time. And if you've seen Game of Thrones, think of that massive freezing wall, the resistance, what do they call it? The White Walkers or whatever. But it's just the sound of a new engine being built. You can either study or stay stuck in the comfort of what you already know, which means you are never gonna learn anything again. Or you can admit it and go, hey, this is going to get uncomfortable for a bit while I invest time to learn. And it's probably why I need to wrap this video up and get back to it.

Push Through And Lock In Upgrades

Lachlan Stuart 5:24

So resistance isn't a sign to stop, it's a sign that you're actually finally doing something that matters. And if you can just sit in the discomfort long enough to finish the job, you'll get the unlock, you'll get the level up. And when you push through that resistance, you don't just finish the task, you unlock a new level of your life. Once you've done the research, built the habit, controlled the fear, the problem you had yesterday isn't a problem anymore. It's just something that you know how to do. You have successfully run the distance. Well done, your first marathon under the belt. You're now the person who understands the topic, and that's a permanent upgrade that no one can ever take away from you. Learning isn't about being the smartest in the room, it's about being the one who's willing to stay on track for the longest until the work is done. So go take that scorecard, find your gap, and start the training. I'll see you in the next one.