48: People Pleasing & Approval Seeking: Are You Looking for Approval in All the Wrong Places?

Welcome to another episode of The Good Mood Clinic Podcast!

Subjugation is common in our society, particularly amongst women and people in the helping professions. 

Subjugation is relevant within schema therapy. Yet it tends to be grossly under-examined and under-rated as a schema because it is generally considered secondary or conditional to the core or unconditional schemas like the abandonment schema, the Emotional Deprivation schema, or the mistrust abuse schema, all of which are developed very early in life.   

Schemas are fascinating because they can influence many aspects of how we behave. To compensate for our unmet emotional needs, we may fall into adaptive compensatory patterns and suppress our needs and sense of self. Or we may take care of others or go along with more dominant individuals to feel accepted, avoid abandonment, or gain approval. 

In this episode, Gemma continues with and expands on the topic of living a subjugated life. She dives into why so many people have what may be referred to as the trifecta of other-directedness- self-sacrifice, people-pleasing, and approval seeking. She also talks about the adaptive processes children go through, to survive a domineering parent, discusses the subtle differences between people pleasing and approval seeking, and explains what you should focus on if you are an approval seeker. Stay tuned for more! 

For confidential information, counselling, and support service go to  https://1800respect.org.au.