51: Overcoming Schema Chemistry: Breaking Old Relationship Patterns

Welcome to another episode of The Good Mood Clinic Podcast!

Over the years, Gemma and Justine have had many clients, mostly women, with some insecure attachment styles. Those clients have a pattern of being attracted to and forming relationships with aloof, inconsistent, unreliable, emotionally depriving, or emotionally unavailable people. They sometimes feel the lack and become aware of what they are not getting from the relationship. Yet something about the relationship dynamic resonates with them subconsciously, so they tend to stay in it. 

Often, they do not know where they stand in their relationship, and they tend to become fraught with insecurity. They become preoccupied with what they are NOT getting and stay in the unsatisfying relationship, wishing and hoping that their partner will change, become more available, and eventually meet their needs.   

People in relationships driven by schema chemistry mostly do not get their emotional needs met. To get a different outcome, they would have to avoid being seduced by the chemistry and learn to judge their relationship and partner according to different criteria. 

In this episode, Justine and Gemma explore some of the barriers associated with change and overcoming schema chemistry. They discuss why it is so hard for some people to make different decisions and avoid getting swept up in schema chemistry.  

Stay tuned for more!

For confidential information, counseling, and support service, go to  https://1800respect.org.au.

Recommended books: Reinventing Your Life by Janet S. Klosko and Jeffrey Young