Disrupting Burnout

83. One Millimeter Movement

March 29, 2023 Dr. Patrice Buckner Jackson Episode 83
Disrupting Burnout
83. One Millimeter Movement
Show Notes Transcript

Welcome to Disrupting Burnout - a podcast where we beat burnout so that you can love your career again! This week on Disrupting Burnout, I’m joined by Lia Valencia Key, a Woman Who Defines Disruption by shining her light and love for all to receive. 

From homeless to 100 million homes, Lia Valencia Key was raised in very humble beginnings in a super-impoverished neighborhood. Shattering glass ceilings by obtaining a Bachelor's Degree in Business, Master's Degree in Education, a Cosmetology Instructor's License, and becoming a Global Hair & Makeup Artist, Lia listened to the Light within and created VALENCIA KEY JEWELRY company - “Wearable JOY” that symbolizes ALL THINGS ARE POSSIBLE.

It’s Time To Disrupt Burnout:

02:00 - Your Journey Is Your Power

14:35 - Finding Peace In Your Soul

24:00 - One Millimeter Movements

31:20 - From Homeless To One Hundred Million Homes

One Millimeter Movement Takeaways

●      “Your predicament does not determine your destiny.” - Lia Valencia Key

●      “Just because you’re fine doesn’t mean there’s not a destiny progressively waiting for you.” - Lia Valencia Key 

●      “Peace is the tranquility of being one with your human emotions and your surroundings.” - Lia Valencia Key  

●      “The mind and the soul are like the body, they hunger to be fed.” - Lia Valencia Key  

●      “When you say your dreams out loud, you give them wings to fly.” - Lia Valencia Key  

●      “You have to walk in your mission for people to see it.” - Lia Valencia Key   

●      “You know you’re not believing if there’s no action.” - Lia Valencia Key  

●      “Say yes to all things positive.” - Lia Valencia Key 

●      “Your heart is more powerful than anything.” - Lia Valencia Key     

Connect With Lia:
Instagram: @valenciakeydesign | https://www.instagram.com/valenciakeydesign/

Facebook: @valenciakey | https://www.facebook.com/valenciakey

Website: https://www.valenciakey.com/


Connect with Dr. PBJ

●               To connect with Dr. PBJ, go topatricebucknerjackson.com

●               Follow Dr. PBJ on IG@drpatricebucknerjackson for#aspoonfulofpbj.

●               Need a dynamic transformational speaker?  Dr. PBJ is ready to serve.  Check outDr. PBJ Speaks | https://www.patricebucknerjackson.com/speaking

●               Support The Show |https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/lovepbj?locale.x=en_US 

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You think you need to do these big things to have big results? The small things, the millimeter things become big things over time, and they're more palatable for me. Hey, friends, it is Dr. Patrice Buckner Jackson again with you know, you call me Dr. PBJ. Listen, this series of women who defined disruption is so good. Now I know it was supposed to be for March for Women's History Month. But we can't stop because I have more powerful women to introduce you to. So here we go. Let's keep going. So the woman, listen, hold on, because I need y'all, I need you to be in a space that you can receive all this love today. Because what I can guarantee you is when you leave this space with us today, you are going to know you are loved, and you will know how valuable you are. I met this woman at a conference last October. And as soon as I saw her, I knew there was something special about her. And you know how you don't want to stare like you. You don't want to be rude. But it was just something magnetic. I had no idea who she was, we were all waiting to go into a VIP event. I had no idea who she was. But it says something about this woman. And then as we go through the event, and I noticed she's one of the panelists. And then the next day, she's the host. Listen. And it's not even about those positions. I watched this woman love on every woman in that room. Not just from the stage. But I'm talking hugs and compliments for everyone that came into her space. And I have been drawn to her love ever since. So without further ado, and she is so accomplished. And we'll get into all of that. But before we get to her accomplishments, I need out of me her heart. So I have the honor of introducing you all to Lia Valencia Key. Lia, thank you so much for being here with us. It's such an honor, I your opening is everything like I've been I've kept me I'm like whose comments like I want to be. I'm your soul. And I just love how you talk and everything. And then when you're introducing this person, I'm starting to cry like I'm already. It's such an honor. It's a blessing. It's a joy to have this time and moment with you and every heart that's listening. I'm grateful to be here. My name is Lia Valencia Key i, i love to share who I am from a perspective of where I come from. Because I I feel like your journey is your power. And how I then I think we need to go all the way back to our journey because curates who we are. And my journey started. And super humble beginnings in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, when I mean humble I mean poverty. I was born in one of the most crime ridden violent areas of Philadelphia, and it was my mother, single mother, born three children, myself, the youngest and my sister and my brother, and we were born into poverty. The only memories that I have in the beginning are living in an under basement of someone's home in this neighborhood. That was violence written throughout the streets, drug transactions on a corner. Just just chaos and trauma around us. And then I like to say that moment went from poverty to destitute when my mother broke her leg and three places and she could no longer do the little work that she was able to do to afford that basement one bedroom apartment for four people. And she's getting us back from school. And there's a padlock on the door. And what that meant was this single mother with three children had no place to take her children. And I remember I blacked out I always share I blacked out a lot of traumatic things probably coping. But there is things that I vividly remember and I remember and I'm young, I will give you age perspective on maybe To the second grade, third grade age. So I don't understand the dynamics. But what's really powerful is I understood feeling I could feel I could feel the pain that was happening right now looking at this lock on the door. And then looking at my mother's face, I knew there was something tragic that had happened to the entire family. And that took us to a homeless shelter, woman's homeless shelter. And I love to paint that picture. Because if no one has experienced that, I'll show you what minds look like visually. If you can imagine a gym room, a big room. And cots if anyone knows what a cot is, is these fold up metal beds. And these little cots are one foot away from each other filling the entire room. And the mother only gets one cut to a family. So that means mothers and children are huddled on this cot caught up to cut, cut after cut fit room filled with mothers. That's the trauma of it to these. Everyone's homeless in here. And so you hear crying and moaning and hopelessness and profanity and just everything that you can visualize as dark trauma going on around us. But I love to share one of the most magical, I call them seeds that was planted in my life from my mother's words, she looked down at us in the middle of this sorrow. And she told her three children, your predicament does not determine your destiny. And that was magical to me, I must admit I'm second or third grade, I don't know what she's talking about. I'm still hearing all of the crying and everything. But it was implanted in my heart. And so I have to share that because everyone that's listening words are powerful. And they're seeds. They could be seeds of greatness, or they could be seeds of destruction, however you decide to use them. And my mother planted the beautiful seed that I took in my heart and we stayed in the homeless shelter for several years. So what that started to happen was, I started in third person, and I left because some people don't like that little Lea myself start to become my environment. So I started to become negative. I start to talk the way I heard everyone speaking I start to fail literally in every class. In school. If lunch had a grade, I was failing it because that's what I saw in there. The second light moment. I love to express now that no I want the first one was a seed because it was just that my soul. This was a light moment because I feel like it it turned on the light for my entire life. And I'm coming back to the homeless shelter from school. And my mother standing at that front door. And and when I greet meet her, she asked me one question, what two parts? Do you want to be a follower Lea leader, Leah. And now I'm about fifth sixth grade. So I'm still young, and I don't understand what she's saying. And she continues, and she explains she says because right now you're following. And what you're doing is you're gonna follow and be exactly what you're following and see. So you, you can be that oralia You can choose to lead. You can choose to lead your life, you can choose to listen to the inner whisper and the inner light inside of you. And you can choose to lead all the way to your destiny, Leah. And now she said you choose and she walked away. And she blessed me with a light Gift of Choice. This more miraculous concept that's out in the world that I didn't know about. And I remember it being like a light bulb to me literally. I was exposed to what was true. Because I thought I had to be what I saw truthfully, people talk like that I talk like that they not studying, I don't study I thought that's what we do. And when my mother blessed me with the understanding that there is this inner voice inside and I knew it was the inner voice truthfully, because I never felt good doing these things. I always wanted something different. I always saw different things for me, but I feel like that was just something but when she exposed that no, that was your that's your inner light. That is your whisper of godly destiny. And all you have to do is choose it and as she she didn't, it's fine. It was hard but I guess that was for me to find out right? But what she did do is juxtapose that do you want to be I'm here, because that's what you want gonna be. And I already knew it was clear, I didn't want this. This inner light that was new to me is a good choice to choose, because I don't know what that has for me, but I'm sure it'll be different than this. And I'll just leave that. And I just start choosing, choosing and choosing. The next day, I went back to school, and I asked my teacher like, how do I get better grades? How do I how do I see beyond where I'm at. And so I'll share it with anyone who's listening. First of all, listening to inside of you, not outside of you. And I know it's really hard. And sometimes you don't know the difference. But when you can get still and hear what God has for you, I call it God. But whoever you define that whisper is, and really just start to listen to what is for you, then the next question is to start asking questions out in the world, and questions will be answered to you. And they'll be Earth Angels that will give you little little keys, that will help unlock the next parts of your journey. Oh, Lia, oh my gosh, who there's so much to unpack here. First of all, I just want to honor your mom, I want to, I want to take this moment and honor your mother, the woman who made the decision, regardless of our circumstances, our trouble what's going on around us right now, I am going to pour light into these children that have been given to me. Because in that circumstance, I'm sure there were many mothers in that same space that did not have like to share with their babies, not even chaining them, you can only give what you have. And sometimes the people who raised us just didn't have it to give sometimes they didn't have it to give. But there was something in your mother, there was something in your mother that caused her to travail in the midst of everything that seemed impossible, and to continue to see light in her children and in the world. So I just want to stop and honor your mother and honor the way you honor her. Thank you, I'm gonna honor the way you honor her because the truth is what you're walking in now. And we'll get to all of that started with that. See? Absolutely. It started with that. See, so you are living in the manifestation of what she deposited in the earth. So I just have to hold that. Thank you. And so for every loving being that list listening, what seeds are you planting? What light can you find? And everyone's not going through darkness. So my story is not a story of my story is a story of darkness, finding the light every moment in my life. But maybe, maybe you're in the light and want to find more light because that's what God has for you. Right? So wherever you are, what seeds are you planting? And what light Are you seeking. And when you live in a sowing and seeking moment, it's just a it's a beautiful life because life overall is challenging Mises and adults that it keeps going, but when the way to make it beautiful, in a way to look and say, Oh my God, look, look at what I've been blessed with is to be in a seed message of just sowing love and beauty in the world beyond whatever is the true predicament around it. And when you so that in and you believe it so much and you seek light it will shine for you. It has to weigh on my life and oh, we're all human. So I love being able to share my voice because it's a representation of everything that's possible for anyone who's listening. Yes, absolutely. And and when you talk about the light of choice, right so then it started with a see but then she gave me this power right she gave me this light of choice to say I know what you see around you. But I need to bring your attention to this light called choice that you actually get to choose right there is actually another option And I love that for this community to hear. Because regardless of where your stage in life is right now, whether you feel like you are in the belly of the trouble, or if you feel like it's fine. Like, it's okay, I'm good. And I know, I know, I know there's something whispering in my heart, but it's fine. That part is fine. That just because you're fine doesn't mean it's not a destiny. Progressively waiting for you. Right? Fine. Find is probably one of the most dangerous places peace is the beautiful place peace is different than fine. Yes, we started the fine, fine, this is settling. I mean, they could be, I could do I see different things for me. But right now, right, right here, it's fine. But pieces is a tranquillity of just being one with your human emotion, and your surroundings. And, and this is this is well, in my soul. That's what peace and peace is ever growing in every level. And we should always seek peace, in everything we do, even in even in the turmoil of life, finding peace in it. Because that's where growth. That's where love, that's where joy all of it grows from a thing of peace. And I think it's an under serve word is an underserved emotion. We don't we never talk about living in a state of peace. Because we're always supposed to be grinding, pushing, striving, seeking and all of those things are great, if you can do it, in peace, but most of us do it and stress to do it and worry most of us do it and angst and anxiety. That's not what God I call God or divine. Whoever your higher power really has for you. Yeah, all of life should be imbalanced and in peace, where it's really well in your soul, even as you're growing. And so just continuously looking for that peace but not being like it's fine. Because you go for Yes, yes, this piece you said piece is not fine. I gotta highlight that. It's not the same thing. piece is also not comfort. Hear me? Always comfort, and you can find peace, even in the midst of the trouble as a matter of finding peace, in the midst of the trouble will help you find your way out. Yeah. That peace in the midst of the discomfort, the the sorrow, the hardship, the tragedy. When you can, there will limit peace is also not reasoning. No people think that to have peace, I need to understand why that's happening. That's not peace. It could be peace, that could be a way to find peace. But peace is a really is this really phenomenon energy that you should always seek in the midst of everything, where it's well in your soul? Yeah, you know, like this is well in my soul. Maybe the storms are blowing. But it's well in my soul. And when something can be well in my soul, then I can now start seeking the light for the next way, but when it's not well, you're trying to deal with everything. When when it's not willing to soul, you're trying to acknowledge all the trauma, and you're taking it on and it's chaos in your brain and it's uncomfortable instead of balance. We all know what that feels like. That's not peace. You can't find the light in that it's very hard to maybe you um, nothing is can I don't believe in cans. It's all possible if you choose to. But a good way to find our next way is to find a way to say it as well. Even if you if people are like well what are you talking about? How? Yeah, even if it's the easiest thing is understanding that there's a greater source bigger than you. And I call it God but whatever you want to define it. Even if you say God, I don't understand why. But I know that there is something different than this. Yeah. And then you accept that, that I know you have something different from me. So now please, there's where the question comes in, show me, show me where I should go. Put the words in my mouth that I need to say, put the dream in my heart, put the vision in my heart. Draw the way out visually for me to see God. And and then that becomes peace. Because you know that you're getting a direction and you're seeking a direction because it's action attached to it. Yes, absolutely. When we say soul, we're talking about your mind your will and your emotions. Want to test? Am I at peace? Check your mind your thoughts, check your wheel, your decisions and your behaviors and check your emotions. How does your heart feel? Not just the heart that beats but the heart that feels you? It's a gaze to check in with yourself? What am I thinking? What are the thoughts that I'm thinking? Is there rest in my mind? Or is there toiling and fighting and confusion? In my mind? Is there rest in my heart? Or is there toiling? In my heart? Is there rest in my decisions? And my emotions? Or am I wrestling concerning my decisions and my behavior? That's how you know, if you're at peace? Or if you're just complacent? Or if you're just fine? Or if you are still there's a difference? There's a difference between peace and giving up? Yes, you can't be peaceful when you give up your knows that there's more, and the soul does not. It doesn't erupt to torture you. It erupts to get your attention. It's an alarm system was an alarm system. And it's created to get your attention to let you know when you are disconnected from you. Oh, this is so good. Oh, fine and peace of mind. My new animal. And Amma Oh, so beautiful. Thank you for that, then I love what you said, piece is not giving up. But I would say pieces giving it over and meaning not giving up, I'm done. But pieces, giving it over to a greater source bigger than you. And if you gotta lift it up to give it over, then you're lifting it up and out of your spirit so that you can do the next move for you. Because you can't control it all. No, you're not in control of everything that life has for you. But you are in control of the next steps of how you handle it of where your next direction is what your next choice is, you do have the control of that. But what happens is when we're bound up, we start to give our control over and and the angst and anxiety take over. And so then what we find is we can't make a move up, right? We can't make a decision where we get stuck in this way. Or like you said, and we just said okay, well, I'm not going to do it at all. And I must admit, every moment I'm giving up in my head, right, like so let's keep it real I do there's two different types of giving up. You can still have p things from my perspective, and have the human action of saying, Okay, I'm done. But, but what what piece and what determination and will, like you said, says okay, I'll allow you to say that or even maybe a thought goes in your head. But then that enter will won't allow you to not make the next step No. And what giving up is not is making another step. Yes, it's I call it millimeter movements there. When I was we didn't even get into that. But wait, I got into the jewelry and creating jewelry and I never really took a real loving to I never really looked at the ruler in such a way that now I look at measurements. And as I was designing, I start to understand the power of a millimeter. A millimeter is one of the smallest it is the smallest measurement on the ruler measure and and I started to realize if if you do one millimeter up, it's a whole different design quality. It's a whole different field of design. And if you do one millimeter down, it's also Oh different field. And so I started to understand that and relationship to life. That it, all we need to do is do one millimeter in the direction of what our heart desires. And it will drastically change our life and you won't see it right away. So I don't see a millimeter as drastic when I'm drawing it. Right. But by the time the sample gets to me, and I create two different ones, and two different millimeters away from each other, they're drastically different. And that's what life is, if you just take a millimeter, I mean, in a smallest action, because life is based on action, it's like, well, how do I gain the things that my heart desires? Whatever that is, is it peace? Well, then you need to do an action toward peace, right? And we're talking about just a superficial thing of BS, there's always has to be an action attached to something to see development happen, and whatever it is, and that action can be millimeter small. And I think what we start to say in the world, is you think you need to do these big things to have big results, the small things, the millimeter things become big things over time. And they're more palatable for me. And so I say, okay, if I'm seeking to keep going in my business, when it's getting really challenging, and I've made a give up statement, but my will says no, not so. Then the next thing is are what one millimeter movement do I do? Okay. The one the one millimeter I can do right now, and in my mindset is, maybe all I do is just send an email. Yeah, maybe all I do is just turn on a podcast like this. Yeah. Like, that's so easy, like, just turn a podcast on to fill my soul with because I know I'm yearning. The soul is almost, it's like the body and hungers. The mind and the soul is like the body. So it hungers to be fed. And you decide choice, what you want to feed it. And what you feed, it determines what you look like. Right? So when I was in the homeless shelter, I was feeding my mind with all the negativity around me. And my results were that failing in class and but now if I choose to feed my mind with beautiful podcasts like this, surrounding myself with people that I aspire, just their whole mindset is what I aspire to have, whether it be digital, just filling my mind, I have no choice, but to be sparked with another action, another millimeter movement, because somebody's gonna tell me do something in there. Right? Some of them say pick up a book, this book. And that's how we grow and life and that's my quest in the world is to just continuously radiate life in our light. Yeah, no matter what state we are, in that it is possible to find light. And continuously be light is actually being what you desire in your your true heart. And that's how you're able to shine in the world. Leah, oh, my gosh, one millimeter, Moon. One little one millimeter. Sometimes we feel like, we don't have the answer. But it's not that you don't have it. It's in you, but you can't access it because there's so much turmoil. But one millimeter movement can help you to get clear, so that you can access the dream, access the answer, access the next step. And sometimes all you need is the next step. You don't need the 10 year plan, one millimeter movement. Hey, Fred, I'm just popping in to let you know that I have just a handful of openings on my calendar over the next three months for one on one coaching clients. If you are an accomplished woman who has found that you've lost your fire over time, if you have been successful doing all the things, but you just want to love your work. Again, if you're really good at what you do, but you know that there is more than you need to reach out. Go to connect with pbj.com Sign up for a connect call. We'll jump on real quick. I just need to make sure you're a good candidate for my coaching program. And if so we'll dig in together and I'll walk this journey with you. All right, y'all reach out connect with Pb de.com. I look forward to speaking with everyone. Dr. PBJ was a coach of mine in a a coaching program. And we had we had her support through the entire program. But we had one week specifically designated to mindset, which was kind of surprising to me like, why do I need this in a business coaching program. But you learn and you realize, and Dr. PBJ taught us that so much of it is in our mind. I remember thinking that I like physically had to work, and work through challenges in order to make my dreams come reality. But what Dr. PJ taught us is that so much of the block isn't like a physical thing, right? It's a mental thing. And then once we're able to release ourselves from the mental blocks, and overcome those and break down those walls. That's when we're able to prosper. And that's how we're able to succeed and live out our dreams. So if you ever get a chance to work with Dr. PBJ, you must you need to you need her. She's phenomenal So, my friend, my sister, you went from homelessness, to 100 million homes. So you gotta you got to finish this story. So this teacher you saw within you your question within and then you started questioning externally, and you said what do I need to do to get better grades? How do you get from that to Valencia key jewelry and all the things that you're doing right now? Yeah, well you get there by the one thing I must say you cannot rely on external factors to get you where you know is for you to be it's all literally inside and I know you hear it a lot but what what I mean from it is we expect people to take us on our journey. What I'm gonna say it's gonna be interesting because there are there are earth I call them Earth Angels, but they're divinely appointed for you. But But it's your actions that allow the Earth Angels to connect you to it. And what happens is I noticed, we expect people to do things for us like oh, you see my you should help me here or I'm looking for someone to help me here. But you're you help yourself inside all the time. And then when you're helping yourself inside and you are taking these physical millimeter movements, and then you're praying your dreams and your prayers up. And you're saying them out loud, not for expectation. You're just saying them literally I say when you say your dreams out loud, you give them wings to fly then God appoints the white person that earth angel to take you one millimeter closer to your dream. So what that means is I literally start looking inside of me for everything that I wanted to be mean an action was first, you know, I want to be love. Like what I saw opposite of me was violence against each other harshness, negativity, all of the things of actions that I was like, That's not who I am and I want to be opposite. So first, inside of me, I decided to be love. And I decided to be light meaning off when I walk in a room. I'm fine looking for possibility and everything and everyone and then I'm deciding to be kind to myself and others. And then when people see that they gravitate to that because it's quite different. Sadly, right and then and then people then I start to do things towards my dream so then I start to say okay, I want to go to college. And then my mother said which was interesting Oh, we can't afford college. i Sorry, can't go because I can't afford to get you there and I'm like, oh, but you told me to give somebody some power now you're like oh but that lighter side of me that you told me was true. And I'm going to college so I don't know I was going but I don't receive that my my light here. But I don't that when I don't receive and so I share that story is because you have to filter the message for You we start to take on everything that people give us. And it's, it's God, God is gonna give you what's for you, right. But what we do is we, we start to allow a man or human to be our own source and then we just are following the path of what someone else is supposed to be. God tells you what's for you and what's not for you. And our goal is to truly listen to that. And so my mother comes in, she filters this thing from her bucket. The truth is, we could i The truth was, I could not go to college, because the truth is, we had nothing. That was her truth. But that wasn't my truth. So you I listen to what other people say, and then what's your truth? And so I'm always looking for my truth every time and I'm like, my truth is college. And I don't know how. And but I'm going and all I'm gonna do is just speak it out. I never asked people for anything. But I'm just sharing where I'm going. And I'm sharing on share. And as I share where I'm going, guidance starts to happen. Little light sources start to pop up to direct me to the counselor. And then and then directly to my aunt who tells me and then and then she says, Oh, okay, I'll get you there. Like it's no brainer. It because the person the earth angel that's divinely appointed to bless you doesn't have to be asked. They don't ask the person what it is. They know it's their assignment, that no mine assignment. So as soon as they hear it, they attach to it. And what happens is when people hear things, and it's not their assignment, it's still in their soul, Bob Goff, a wonderful leader share that the human is designed to help. And so when your dreams are out in the world, people will it will place somewhere in their memory bank, and as soon as a trigger connects to you, they think of you a meeting, they're like, oh, my gosh, Leo wants to go to college. I know, a grant that's gonna help Leah, get to college, Leah, here's the grant, then you got to go do the work. Remember, you got to, and that's just been the story of my life. So my life was this. Looking inside, saying my dreams, being positive, even in every hardship, and then deciding when I'm going to be and allowing my life to be flexible in my dreams. Like my dream was to go to college, I went there, I finished it. My mother always said complete. So I completed it. And then I start to decide, oh, I want to go into art. I got my master's in education, I completed that whole thing. But I went inside again. I was like, that's not for me that so that's why I like to share sometime you're in a good place. Like, I believe in college is a good place. But academics at that moment wasn't for me, it was art that was for me. And I knew it. And I heard it very clear. And it was the harder way to go. Because the world said you get a salary doing these things. Art is a harder struggle. And I'm like, oh, okay, I know struggle a bit. I know that. So I started to do art through the form of hair and makeup. And I went to cosmetology school, got my cosmetology license, what floors with a master's degree, I love to share that. Don't humble, humble yourself, that the journey will take you different places, and you got to sometime go to the valley to like, so you're like, great, wow, that's sweet. But salon floor because if if your destiny is in that direction, then sometime you got to do the things and I was sweeping floors for a purpose. I wasn't just sweeping floors. I was sweeping a salon floor. Because in that salon, it was all about education. And it was all about default culture. haircare, so African American woman and I wanted to not be labeled. I wanted to be able to do all types of hair. And so I knew I wanted to be in that place. When my friend saw my dream because I was living my dream. She saw me going to school and she said oh, my friend has a salon. Let me connect you. That's how God does. When when you're walking in your mission. Even in a struggle people see it. You got to walk in the mission for people to see it. And that's the power sometime we're waiting for someone to help us. But God wants you to literally walk in your mission, do the hard things for yourself. And just by you You're physically doing the hard things for yourself, someone's gonna see it. And then they're going to take you to another journey. So I'm sweeping floors, and I'm learning all types of hair. I'm making like $8 An hour under the table, but I'm learning. This teacher just taught me everything. And then I was exposed to a thing called QVC. Whoa, what is that I never knew what it is. And it was a 24 hours, it is a 24 hour television show where they're, they're broadcasting to homes all across the world selling products and gifts. I'm like, oh, it's gonna be a salon in there. I don't want to be at so what's the lines are my I want to be a salon stylist, I want to work there like specific. So my next thing is like, be specific about your dreams. Be I want to be a stylist, that'll keep you loose in the air just floating. You're not like, you don't want to be a float, you want to define your dream so clear. Because then everything you do, even if it looks like it's outside of that is focusing toward that. So then I realized like, I want to be a QVC. Stylists period now from that statement to when it happened was at least five to six years. So I like to share that. When you define your dream, it's not going to happen automatically. It could your blessed if it does, but don't give up watching the Oscars yesterday. And one of the winners gentleman, he was a child, a child actor. He didn't get asked until now he looks like he's in his 50s or something. He's older now. Right? And it was a 20 year gap between and don't give up on your dreams, you have to do things in between to survive. Yeah. But as you're doing your thing to survive, never give up on your dream, never just put it down. Keep doing the little millimeter movements towards your dream, even when you just got to work this thing to put food on the table. Or even if you've got to deal with these people to finish college or whatever the case is. Always have your dream so specific. So I targeted QVC and a really clear way. And it took me six years to get there. I got so many knows I finally got my cosmetology license, I got no so many times that I wasn't qualified. I even went to the studio one day, because this was when there was no lots of security. And I'm like, Oh, they need to see my light. Because every time people meet me, it's a thing like that. Oh, that's it? Oh, so my other key is, keep trying different things. The way you don't give up because, you know, I'm always giving up. So I'm I'm an expert at how to not give up. And the way you don't give up is when the give up spirit happens. That's it's real. What else can I try? That's different. It's still towards my goal, but it's different than what I've been doing. And if you keep trying, it's like a it's like a Rubik's cube if you keep changing the Rubik's cube A Million Ways. You've got to get the lineup eventually, right. So I keep trying like I was putting in the email and and isn't it? Oh, I gotta go in person. So then I go in person. And there's a gatekeeper security guard there. And he asked me Oh, were you here for and I'm like, Oh, I just want to get my CD back in a damn date myself to the to the salon. And I'm like, there is a salon here, right? And he's like, yes, but you need a name. And I'm like, Oh, I don't have a name but just the manager and he's like unless you Devon lane, you actually have to turn off him and get off the premises. Like you don't belong here. And so at that moment, I'm weeping human tears. Because my spirit is broken again for the fifth year. But my inner whisper is saying you're gonna walk that same man one day you're gonna work here and you're gonna and I share that story and I get emotional about it because something in your life whoever's listening, all the things around you are saying opposite. Like everything is wrong. Everything's going wrong. Every there's knows every thing you're trying is not happening. But what is your soul and your inner heart say? Because that's the truth. And if you if you if you know truth and you recognize truth, you hold on to that truth and you keep going to try toward the truth. Because there are so many naysayers in the world. There are so many obstacles, and the only what you see people that do great things parenthese Just because everybody's doing great things, the fact that you're living and breathing and trying is great. But if you look at this celebration of what great things is, the difference is, they go and keep going. Because they believe it to be true. Like, my loving dear friend created the book, believe it. She's amazing, so amazing. But just everything in here is that story on a times a million level of how believing is possible. But when you believe it so much, it creates an action I gotta keep going back to action believing is, you know, you're not believing when you're not doing an action. Oh, you don't really believe it? If you haven't, do anything. And I believe in taking breaks. Don't listen to me because it takes me real long to get things done. Because I live in a peace state. So when something is not bringing the peace, I do step away from it a little bit. I choose peace over anything. My mother died way early, she died in her 40s. And I don't think I she didn't truly live she was bound by fear, and society stereotypes and bouncers. She was able to speak this out, and I'm honored for that. But physically, she can break out of fear. And a p state. So I live in peace. So I take a moment, like I haven't given up but I'm well I'm gonna step off a little bit again. And then I come back. And now I have some more energy and some more power. So, so believe so much that it catapults you into another millimeter movement, which is the action movement. And I and so to speed this story up, I would just share this dream of QVC to everyone I know. And I didn't, I wasn't asking for anyone to help me do anything. I was saying it out. Because every time I hear myself say it, it made it so real for me that it had to happen. So then it would allow me to try another thing. And one day I'm speaking, I'm at a bartender to survive on bartending. And it's just me and this gentleman, and I'm serving him. And he said couple sentences to me. So my next sentence is, I want to work for QVC because that was my thing. I tell everybody, and he's like, really, my friend works there. Let me see. And I'm like, okay, and say yes, to all things positive. Key is like, don't count yourself out. I feel like in the world, like everyone puts these standards on things, too, you gotta have this to be this. And you've got to already have done this to make it like and so you have these society things that people say you have to do and B and then when it leaves, if you're not working from your inner self, got to work in your answer. You, you start counting yourself out, because you start looking at the boxes, and you can't check any of those off. So then you're like, Oh, I can't do that. I don't believe in boxes. I don't have to check any of those boxes. If God said it to be so that I'm gonna find the actions to do to make it so meaning the action was I gotta get a cosmetology license, I gotta roll over that. And start taking the control where you can take it because there's always actions that you can do, do those little action. And don't worry about checking the boxes off and still put yourself in the position that you say you're supposed to be. So he says, I'll give you the person. So he sends me a text message. The person sends me a text message the next day, who has never met me, Stephanie Humphrey, his name was Fred out and Stephanie Humphrey actually becomes is like my dear friend, sister now which is divine. But your heart is more powerful than anything. How you are in the world is more powerful than any talent, skill, ability and direction you can ever be and and who you are to people will take you farther than what you can ever do. Yes, from my perspective, yes. And you're granted and blessed. Generational blessings that don't move you up and you don't have to be a nice person. But I'm saying coming from where I come from. I was never the best hairstylist. Never the best anything, but I believe in being love. And that has moved me around it. So this man who has felt my heart in a bar told this human that never met me My heart and my light and And he must have given it to them so pure that they wanted to help me. And so Stephanie texted me didn't know me from anything. Here's the manager's name, here's their number, here's their email address, and all use me as a reference. Lea. So I'm gonna pause just for a minute. And by the way, new drove up to that security area. The man said, Do you have a name? You didn't have a name, you didn't have a name. But you didn't give up you went back to what you were doing just kept speaking to dream speaking and during, and through speaking the dream. You didn't even say okay, I've got to be at this place at this time. Because this is the only way that I'm going to get into QVC you are minding your business, doing nothing but speaking your dream. And through speaking your dream, not only did you get a name, not only did you get a phone number, but you got a reference amazing in that, I must say you've got to be ready though. So you're speaking your dream, right? What does your dream need, that's your job. Your job is to get the things done that your dream needs in the capacity that you can do it. Me and my dream was to work for QVC now my dream needed a cosmetology license but that to be so I can control that. I'm gonna work on that. And so you're doing everything my dream needed to understand from my perspective what I imagined my dream because if I turned on QVC it was a bunch of different people my dream needed to know different hair types and textures and understanding how to apply me and that's what my dream needed. Okay, I'm gonna go sweep floors in a salon and work on that see, you've got to be working on what your dream needs. And then as you're working on what your dream needs, now you're speaking it out because when your dream catches, you got to be remotely ready you don't have to be always ready I don't believe no such thing as already. But you've got to have been working on the dream to be able to be in the sphere of being able to catch the dream. So now I must admit five years six years of no gave me five six years of training because if I hadn't gotten an interview five years ago, I know nothing. Even gave me class and so now I have the interview the lovely Stephanie Humphrey type check her out tech Lightstep on Instagram, she's magical. And now these doors opened immediately. Jack got the yes for the interview. I've been working for mac cosmetics that manager happened the new manager at QVC happened to work from that cosmetic I had been sweeping floors learning all different hair textures. They gave me beautiful hosts with wonderful different hair texture is mine and so I wasn't ready but I have been training and so I get there and vote but what what superseded everything in the interview was my spirit. It was my my willingness to be joy. It was my willingness to smile. I think the most simplest thing we can do to improve our spirit and our energy is smile. When we walk in places smile in your home by yourself. Even when you don't feel good smile changes the whole dynamics of the energy in yourself. And in the room. It's magical if you're looking to see if people count how many people are smiling. You literally can count how many people are smiling and some people aren't smiling because they're thinking and I get it. But if you understand what a smile does, it says I'm welcoming. It says I'm open it says it says I'm see you it says all these different nuances that most people are looking for, but don't do and so I got that job and that job and PVC exposed me to another and this is my third light I'd say you know I've had all these turtles a light but the third big light was I was exposed to oh my god just humans living out their dream like host making people's dreams happen. And business owners deciding that if you had a love and a passion and put it in a tangible product, and really had love in that product, it will become life changing in the receivers hands. And I didn't even know from where I came In fact, this was possible. I don't know how I thought businesses started, I really don't. But I didn't know like real human people from real random places were creating them. But I got to have these people sit in my chair, and got to talk. But these are just humans, like, who had passion and work real hard and dream and do and don't give up and fail and come back and go on air and see their numbers do really great. And then the next time see their numbers were really bad. And then they show back up the next day. And I was exposed to this. So my, my next key is exposure as power. Exposure is transformative to your life. So whatever you want, go get exposed to it. Yeah. And it doesn't have to cost you I think a lot of people pay a lot of money. I'm not saying don't pay money for training. I'm not saying that. Please pay money for training, if that's what you know, to be true. But if you don't have the money, you don't have to pay money for training, go look up Eventbrite. And find a free activity of mine development workshops or meetings or something like that, and just get in a space of exposure. Yeah. And expose a set space of exposure will turn so many lights on for you, because you'll start to see what's possible that you didn't even know what was possible. And that's what happened to me. Two beautiful hearts. found me and Jamie Kern Lima FOUND IT Cosmetics, our best friend, Jacqueline Finn, and actually saw me first they saw my light. And then Vicky, sigh founder of toxic skincare. We were I was in the salon, this light and a salon just with so much possibility. What I didn't share was my mother passed very early. I mentioned that briefly. But before she passed, she saw my light shining. And as she started, she saw the trajectory of my change. And before she passed, she said that, Oh, I see your light. I see you choosing your light, I see you leaving I see you leaving into your own destiny. And it's beautiful. And she handed me over these little earrings. And she said, Now where are your earrings every day. And let them be a reminder because there's going to be times that you may not know that you still have light inside of you, you may the light may get so dim. But when you look at your earrings, when you touch them, let them be a reminder that all of the beautiful light that is still within you and all you have to do is reach us. Right? It's so weird, it was always there. So that's beautiful for everybody. Whatever it is, it's all it will never leave you, the light will never leave you. I don't care how dark it gets. The only way it leaves you if you allow it to never tap back into it. It'll stay there. It'll be there it's waiting for you to tap into it in you just need these trigger reminders to tap into it. And so I from that moment was hand sketching jewelry as therapy my mother left this earth and I was sketching therapeutically for myself but what what what the symbols look like that will remind me and it was in a jewelry form and then when I walked into this exposure of explosion of light people just doing the thing I have realized that wow I've been seeing sketching this and the last thing what I sought out a beautiful women hearts what they would do is what earrings Am I gonna put on what necklace Am I gonna put on? And it was a seal of confidence. It was a seal of bravery it was a seal of light no the I couldn't go on stage with them their coach and the team couldn't go on air when Mr. And oppressing them when I'm what their necklace could their hearings could and I realized I had been drawing this. My journey has been a journey from darkness to consistently seeking light. And how do I allow people to have wearable symbols that can go with them throughout life, no matter where they are, no matter what stage or what hardship or what celebration they walk in to have the symbolic things to be reminded to celebrate that they are light or to be reminded that there is consistent life. And I started seeing through Jamie and Vicki that it's possible and they took me under their wing and took a stylist like me around the world with them literally and allowed me to sit in rooms that maybe Aspire stylists wouldn't be invited into and it was just me sit there and and so my next thing is like if you have the ability to expose someone to anything, please do because it can be transformative to the world. because their exposure unlocked this power that I'm able to speak to you on right because a me creating Valencia key is what I then realized that it was my next mission to create wearable symbolic, my column pieces of joy. Valencia means bravery and a Spanish slang dialect. And key, as we know is to unlock. And that happens to be my name, middle and last name, which is cool, but it defines unlocking your bravery, unlocking your life, unlocking your possibility consistently, over and over again. And the wearable pieces are symbolic that if a young girl from a homeless shelter, where societies specifically says all odds are against her and out if you can wear my jewelry, if you can touch and wear, what ever your prayers are, are possible. It's physical humans, we need physical proof. Yeah. And no, this is physical proof that whatever you're preys on, it doesn't have to be a dream. Maybe Maybe you're praying for family. It's possible it's possible to start rewiring, which what that looks like for you, but it's possible and sometimes we need those reminders to keep going. And that's my other way of always having that ability to keep believing to next fold. I want to make that millimeter movement. And that's where we are and PBS did a 26 minute episode on Valencia key my jewelry brand 2020 The earrings were in Oprah's Favorite Things magazine. QVC. After three years of dreaming to have my jewelry on QVC a big competition came out. And I had spoke bad dream in the world. Everybody that would listen, I want my jewelry on QVC. Now USA Oh, she's in the QVC salon. Isn't it easy? No, it's actually harder. Because you're you're so far away from where the magic is happening. You're the frontlines of the last touch up where it goes on air. But there's no connection of, oh, we're there. And then it's a beautiful thing. There's not nepotism. And so it's really hard for me to have done that. But I shared my dream to everyone that would listen and I wanted my jewelry on QVC it took me three years of just women showing up and wearing my pieces, they would meet my spirit and say I want to I want to wear that on there. Like that spirit. I'm giving them earrings, so I can wear it on there. I made a little bit of it. And they aware it and shine their light. And then someone text me three years later that QVC was having a big, big fun competition and that you've been saying it is your time now. And at the what I like to share this in closing I thought I had the first message came in and I was like, Oh, I'm not ready. So I counted myself out. someone's listening is counting yourself out. And you have to listen to not so there's this you the brain, the mind you which is beautiful and dangerous all at the same time. Because the mind is meant to protect you. It's the methodical, it's still it. She's, she's well, she's there for you, in a sense, but sometimes she sends her things through a protection filter that could be skewed right? Or she's taking in a lot of things from the world that could be skewed and she's processing it through a processing lens of experiences and things so it's it's a beautiful thing, but it can also be a dangerous thing. We I was just at a magical dinner yesterday, my friend does array. She's on there for IT Cosmetics. She exposed me princess of Zambia, how cool and sitting there. City hall she came to speak and then we had dinner afterwards. And the table was so beautiful. So it's the princess of Zambia. It's a beautiful business woman from Kenya who's now here. It's an African American, beautiful woman who's the connector of all humans, which is magical. Then there's a Cantonese an Asian man who has the restaurant sitting at the table then there's a Caucasian man Brian, who's whose great great grandfather helped with slavery. And then there's another Caucasian man who's the marketing network in man and then Deseret, she's Caucasian and this beautiful light in the world. And then there's me that and this is the beautiful table of just cultures, eating together. up. But what happened was, we start talking about truth. So get yourself in spaces of good conversation, because that was should literally change your life. And what what came out was that what we're normally used to is censoring to the world. Yeah, I'm assimilating. And that happens in the brain, because you always want to fit in, right? You want to. But I told myself when that first message came, I wasn't ready, because myself was protecting me, my brain was, but my heart knew that it was for me. But then God sends another message. So this is what I want to say, You, God's not going to stop telling you what's for you. You can keep flying it away, but God, so God sends another message is like four days later saying the same thing from a whole different human being. No connection, the same thing. And then that was my son, because I'm always I'm always in a symbolic symbol. There's always signs in the world telling you direction. And I'm like, Oh, God, I'm not ready acknowledgement of the grant. But you say yes, so then I'm gonna walk to it. And then I'm just going to read the application, and I'm gonna do a full out whatever the application says, I'm gonna do full out. And then I'm going to tap into my friends that help taze me. And then I'm going to tap into my friend, Marissa, who works for Josie Merna, who, who helps curate stories, and I'm going to ask her to hear my story. And she started picking up my story. And so people will bless you, but you got to have the ingredients. Right? And then I went for it full out. And then that moved into several auditions. And I finally got to Yes, for QVC that dream that I had to be on QVC I spoken the world. And so if anything I leave you with is dreams do come true. I'm sitting in a middle space now where I want my business to grow. And I'm, I'm having challenges, you know, with sales and growth and, and that understanding because I'm not a business person, I'm a creator. And I'm being vulnerable and transparent. I'm in a space of where the world if I statistic, if I look at my business, from a statistic standpoint, from a world standard, I should give up. Right? But my inner heart is saying the same thing that it said for QVC. And it's like, you've got a blessing to give to the world and it's in this form of tangible pieces, but it's a blessing a gift to the world. So I'm gonna listen to my same message. And I'm gonna just keep doing an Illumina movement. So I pray that you join me and whatever your life journey is for you to do your millimeter movements. And we did our goal is to shine light consistently. Through everything even in the heart things be light, and it's going to inspire someone else to be light with. Valencia key let me say something to you because I do recognize that when you are the light when you are the love when you are the encourager sometimes we don't pause long enough to receive it for ourselves. Because we're so busy pouring out to other people. Ever since the day I met you, I've been wearing Valencia key. And let me tell you why. I love beautiful jewelry I always have but your your your jewelry is more than beautiful. In this season of my life where I am walking by faith in the stream and towards this dream and doing something that I've never done before. Your jewelry reminds me of why I do it. Wearing this joy during this podcast and seeing myself wearing Valencia key reminds me that it's possible. It reminds me that I can believe it reminds me that there sparkle in me and not in you know just Hi fly your way but in a very direct pierced my heart way of I have to show up because I have something to give. I gave my daughter and my nieces your hair jewelry for Christmas and I told them a little piece of your story. Because I want them to always know that they have choice and that the dream that God has put on the inside of them. It will come forward if they keep taking steps that whatever they see is real, whatever they see in their heart is real, and it will come for so I want you to know that and I love this I'm gonna sit I know we got to let the people go. But I always talk about the difference between purpose and passion, right? I believe purpose is that innate, unique brilliance that you specifically bring to the world. And your passions are the expressions of that, like how you how you bring it to the world, how you are the vehicle through which so your purpose Lea, your purpose is light and love you are you embody every space that you are in its field, it is undeniable, it is undeniable. And you have brought that light and love you brought that light and love. When you were sweeping floors, you brought that light and love through bartender, you brought that light and love through everybody has who has sat in your chair, to have their hair there, the glory, their hair, and their faces, made beauty more beautiful. Just you know, accentuate it, you brought light and love through Valencia key jewelry, and even just your speaking and your presence, you express light and love and everything that you do. So I'm here to tell you that just as your testimony shows exactly what you see in your heart for Valencia key, that's what it's gonna be, and when I receive it, and thank you for that message, because everything that you said is everything I pray for. And so my message My My prayers are answered, yeah, already. So if I'm looking at what society says, that's not what matters is what you just said, because that's why I created it. And so for that is everything that I dream up and pray for, and I have to keep spreading that because I want us all to keep going after what God has for us. So thank you for that. Amen. Amen. Listen, friends, we gotta let you go. But I told you, I told you so you all need to follow Leah. You all need to go to Valencia key.com and sell her out. Go buy her out. And y'all know I don't appeal in this way. I don't do this. But when I tell you exactly what you experienced through this through hearing this woman's voice is at that's what you get as you wear this jewelry bless yourself and bless somebody else. You You have the power and the light of choice. And there's a dream on the inside of you. That is literally God given you didn't make it up. You're not wrong. You're not wrong. You're not wrong. Yeah, it's true. It's true. And one millimeter movement is how you're gonna get there. As always, you know, you are powerful. You are significant. And you are loved. Love always PBJ love ya