Welcome to Disrupting Burnout - While we often define ourselves in the doing, what if we defined ourselves in the being. What if we defined ourselves by who our Heavenly Father says we are and understood that our true identity is that we are created by God and valued as God’s best.
Dr. Alicia D. Ritchey is a progressive educator, consultant, business designer, and trainer, is Founder of A Ritch Enterprise and a National Board-Certified Educator, Dr. Ritchey’s impressive body of research has resulted in a national curriculum used to help develop culturally responsive educators in schools and community-based programs across the country and abroad.
Be More, Do Less Takeaways
● “I am the expression of God.” - Dr. Alicia D. Ritchey
● “Disrupting burnout is disrupting false balance.” - Dr. Alicia D. Ritchey
● “We are called to express God’s best in the earth.” - Dr. Alicia D. Ritchey
● “My relationship with God was one of decapitation.” - Dr. Alicia D. Ritchey
● “The wonderful thing about God is that he’ll meet us where we are.” - Dr. Alicia D. Ritchey
● “We have evolved into burnout.” - Dr. Alicia D. Ritchey
● “Too often, people allow their employer to be the entrepreneur of their lives.” - Dr. Alicia D. Ritchey
● “Burnout is dismembered from purpose.” - Dr. Alicia D. Ritchey
● “The Lord has perfected everything concerning you.” - Dr. Alicia D. Ritchey
This episode is brought to you by the HeartWork Academy! If you’ve ever felt like you're marching in place, putting in all of the effort, but not moving forward, this program is for you. If you feel buried and you’re ready to move into brilliance, it’s time to join a community of disruptors who understand and who genuinely want to support you and hold you accountable as you show up in purpose everyday. To join the Heartwork Academy, visit: http://heartworkacademy.com.
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When you get to a place of burnout, the healing is in reconnecting to our true identity. Hey, friends, it's Dr. PBJ here again, and I have another episode of women who define disruption. Let me tell y'all something. This is a season in my life where God is allowing me to encounter and to connect with powerful women. And when I say powerful women, I'm talking about women who are living in purpose, but are also pulling that purpose out of others. And today, I have the honor of introducing you all to a woman from the first meeting with her from my first interaction with her, my heart was set on fire, to do the thing that God has called me to do. And we've had several calls since then, and meetings and she's invited me to speak at her conference. And every time I engage with this powerful woman, I feel energized to go do the thing that I was created to do. So I know you want to meet her. I know you want to meet her, but just a few things. So Dr. Alicia Ritchey, first of all, she's a national board certified educated. Now, if you are an educator, you know what that means. That means the top in the country, not just that, not just that, but Dr. Ritchey created national curriculum to develop culturally responsive educators in schools and community based programs across the country and beyond. Listen, nobody can tell it like she can tell it. So I'm going to bring her up. But when I tell you, this woman, lights of fire in my belly, every time I talk to her, I cannot wait for you all to hear what she has to share. Dr. Ritchey, welcome to the Disrupting Burnout podcast. Thank you for having me. Dr. Patrice Jackson, I appreciate the opportunity. Yes, ma'am. Yes, ma'am. So let's get into it. And I want to start, I always start by you telling the people who you are. Absolutely. And I'll start by saying that I am the expression of God. And I lead with that I am the expression of His love, I'm expressing the expression of His joy, his peace, His righteousness, his balance, right the expression of his balance. I think of the scripture that a false balance is an abomination. But a just wait, is his delight. So I like to think that I represent that in my life. And and I see the relationship between that scripture and even the work that you do to disrupt burnout. Because for me disrupting burnout is disrupting that false balance that people adopt and embrace as a way of life. And so I like to think of myself as God's best in the earth. Because I believe that we are called to express his best in the year. Oh, my gosh, I don't need with my you know, my occupation or vocation. You know, I leave but you asked, Who are you? And so I want to start that's a part of the disrupting burnout. We often define ourselves in the doing. And today, I want to define myself in the being, oh, wait a minute. Okay, wait a minute. So defining yourself as God's best, I have to part right there for a minute. I have to part right there for a minute because I myself have recognized recently that I have struggled to identify as my true identity as who I am. And God's best that there may have been lessons in our lives where we learned that that's not humble, where we learned that that is a prideful thought. But I've gotten to a place where I feel like it's my responsibility. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. So originally, if you gave me a gift, if you gave me a precious gift, and I just tossed it to the side and acted like I didn't own it, because I wanted to be humble, rather not honor the gift you gave. Right? Right. But if I if I honored that gift, if I share, cherish it, if I share it then that gives honor to the value of the gift. So we don't honor God or anybody else by pretending that we are not God's best. That's right. That's right. And just to share an example, I recall, I'll never forget, when my pastor, my spiritual leader, said, an hour, we were sitting. And I, it escapes me where we were. But I recall being in conversation with him, and he made a comment. And he said, I am Christ. And I thought, Wait, that's blasphemy. And he said, You are too. And I said, quite honestly, I said, No. So Brother. You can't get me the joy. No, sir, you go to hell by yourself on that way. I won't be joining you there. And then as I paused, the Spirit spoke to me and said, If I call your head Alyssia, will your body not respond also? So if you are the body of Christ, how is it that you cannot reference yourself as Christ in the earth? And it occurred to me that my relationship with God was one of the capitation. So the head was over here, and the body was over here. Right? And so how then if we are separate and apart, how do I express who he is, except that we are one. And so you know, when you talk about this notion of humility, it's a part of that false balance, like it doesn't match. So you know, as I began to think about who am I, I can only identify identify myself as who God is, after all, we're one. Oh, my goodness. Yeah. So talk to us about how you express that in the earth. What does that look like? Dr. Ritchey? It looks like, for me, it looks like asking him what is it because the expression has to be intelligible to the people that we are communicating the message to, right. And so I can say to you, I love you. But if you don't understand love in that way, then I have my love is not intelligible. Right? It's it's not understood. And in reality, it's insignificant, right? Because it has no impact. Like I can't impact you, if I'm not communicating with you in a way that is understood to you. So in each space that I occupied, the question becomes, God helped me to understand these people, how, how will they in your wisdom? How can I best serve them in a way that they understand that there's something unique about what they are experiencing? So that's what it looks like, for me, whether it is in my writing, that they leave that experience. And wait a minute, there's something very different about this, because I think that difference is what prompts them to want more, prompts them to want to understand more, and then it opens the door for me to be able to say, without saying, that was God. Here's what you just display for us. Because sometimes we've been taught that our expression of God is held for within the walls of a church, absolutely, or a holy place, right. But what you just described is, no matter where you show up, virtually in person or school accompany in your writing, and your publishing, no matter in your events, no matter where you show, whatever, no matter how brilliant, you are, the expression of God in that space, and a way that the people can understand exactly. And that expression of God is in his excellence in the, you know, in the brilliance in the splendor. And so when I take on a project as an example, and I am committed to excellence, or I'm committed to giving them my best, what I'm saying is that I'm giving you, God, come on. And again, if I'm giving you God in a way that's only intelligible in the four walls of a church, but I can't reach government, I can't reach the education sector, I can't reach the business sector, then the gospel I preach is any effective. Come on, right so they I haven't shown that I'm an able minister. Right, unless I'm able to express God again, in a way that people can understand for whatever is the space that we occupy. Hmm, yeah, as you're speaking, I hear marketplace ministers. Yeah, we are ministers, no matter where we go. And minister just means to serve. Like the word Minister literally, to serve, there it is. Wherever you are serving. That place is where you ministered. That place is where you are the expression of God. And the key that you're teaching us is in the way that the people can consume it. Absolutely. If you're speaking above their hands, or if you're trying to force feed something they're not ready to receive. You're not being effective, that is not effective ministry is not effective education is not effective work. When we leave, people should know that they've been impacted by something they've never done. That's right. That's, that's right. Absolutely. Yes, they should. How did you become aware of this in your life? Have you always known that you are the expression of God? No. Tell us No, I spent so much of my life. Quite honestly, I struggled with low self esteem. And so I was I was told that I was smart, right? And so the way to get attention that I thought, you know, was to, to, to be smart by doing. And so I spent so much of my life, proving by doing, right. And I think that's how I ended up him burnout. You know what I'm saying? Because, because what happens is you can never do enough, right? And people get used to that, right? They get used to you doing so if ever you turn off the doing. And all of us, you've lost your value. And sometimes I can't do because I'm tired. Yeah, but you've been doing so just keep doing it. Keep doing it. Yeah, but I'm tired. Wait, wait my joints? Yeah, but you've been doing so keep doing. So now I'm just wearing myself out in every aspect of of, you know, in every aspect possible. So my mental health is now compromised. My physical health is compromised, my emotional health is compromised. So to answer your question, I did not always know that. Right? Because I wasn't leading in the confidence of who I was in the as the expression of God in my bed. So if I did, so now, I can sit halfway cross my legs, because halfway cross my legs across him at the ankle. And know that my value? It is because God is yes. And just like we have to first believe that he is I had to first believe that I am. And look, I don't mean and up there in the IL first believe that I am. Right. So no, I didn't always know that. And I think the wonderful thing about God is that he'll meet us where we are. And so if he got to meet us in burnout, he's that kind of, he's good like that he'll meet us and burn out, he'll meet us in tow up from the flow up, you know, he'll meet us in those low places in the dry places to help us to understand Wait a minute, so you thought you was sufficient of yourself. So you trusted in you know, not to go script or or in the arm of the flesh. That what what life people had designed for you what's going to get you to where you need to be you trusted in all of that. And only to find that you ended up here. So my dad used to say the end, justifies the means. In other words, the outcome, excuse me, I'm sorry, the outcome validates the process. And so if I ended up in a low place, where as an outcome, if I ended up burned out as an outcome, there was something wrong with my process. So I had it was in that outcome, the adverse, you know, effect of the process that I learned that something is wrong with the process. Right. So to answer your question, no, I wasn't always there. I was not quite honestly, I was far from there. I feel like you were in my prayer time this this morning. Oh, wow. This morning because literally this morning, I had the thought and it came to me how burnout saved My life. Wow. Wow. Absolutely. And I hadn't always thought about my burnout experience in that way. I thought about the cost and the consequences. And there weren't, there are costs and consequences. And that moment was my turning point. That moment was my awakening moment, that moment, it was because of burnout that I was willing to see myself beyond everything I had done everything I had accomplished, the degrees, the experience the title, right, because of burnout, that my eyes were open. So when you talk about God will meet you, He will meet you in the midst of whatever the disruption is. Yeah. So let me just say this, because when we talk about disruption, we mean, sometimes you need a disruption disruption can be divine. Absolutely. Yes, it brings you to the point where you need to be so that you can heal, and so that you can become aware of who you are and who you were created. Absolutely. Oh, my goodness. Oh, my goodness. And then you talked about proving by doing, we got to highlight that, because so many of us are doers. We're doers. We are nurturers, we want to save people we want to be the one you depend on. We want to answer the problem we want to take care of folks. And then we get burned out we we realize you got to realize that you train people how to treat absolutely have you train people how to treat you to have everybody in your life is expecting you to show up friend who is the common denominator. So the proving by doing so many of us, especially accomplished women. In fact, I can share this with you just an honest part of my story. I you know, I think about even in for the benefit of your audience, I think about even in my marriage, no sometimes that proving by doing hat is LED, of course, with the low self esteem, but also the comparing to the other. Right. And so I thought, you know, my former husband was in, we had a construction company, and I'm thinking, you know, he's gonna meet all these beautiful women. So, here I bring to the equation low self esteem. Now I'm gonna compound that with comparing myself to these beautiful women. Come on. But I tell you what, this is what I say. They can't outwork me. Well, that was set up. You so again, the equation, low self esteem, compare myself to another, right? And how I respond to that by over doing, Dr. Ritchey. So like you say, It ain't nobody fault, but man, I have to own that. I have to own that. So in the undoing, you know, a lot of things were undone, not just the behavior, right? I had to undo even the attitude, right, or the approach of comparison, and the attitude of low self esteem. So a lot of things have to be undone. So when we talk about disrupting burnout, we are talking about undoing. We're talking about a real revolution, of personal revolution. And I think about the more civilized we have become as a humanity, the more technologically, we have become, as a society. Technologically advanced we become the more prone so the more prone we become to burnout. Yes, ma'am. The thing that was supposed to bring convenience, right has led us to a sick society. Right? So the more cultured we're supposed to be, how do we end up at this place of sickness? Right. And so I think that what is when I think of disruption, I think of running an interference with what is the natural evolution. So so, you know, I go back to my spiritual leader who talks about it's not evolution. We don't need an apple We don't need evolution. You know, evolution is a natural progression of society that's gonna kill us. Right? It is the evolution that is increasingly taking us to a place of of burnout. Yeah. Okay, it's what we need is a revolution. Can we turn this thing back around? Right? And where do we end up when we turn it around? Well, of course, I think of the biblical text, right? What was Adams experience? Before the Fall? Adam could design a life, right for himself. that would that would end in a healthy place. After the fall, however, now you got to work. Now, why have you gotta submit all this? We see all this stuff. Bench, we're working in harmony? No, we got this hierarchy. Yeah, right. And in the hierarchy, we have this relationship, where one is now trying to fight for this. So I have power over this and, and was trying to do this. It's this relationship of doing who, right but before the fall, so we don't need an evolution, we need a revolution, we turn this thing back around to the place where when I think of the authorities and the powers that God had given to Adam, the power, the name and what you call it, that's what it is, yes, my word to subdue. And listen, none of this had to do with work. Work wasn't even brought into the picture, until Adam lost sight of who he was. Right. And so when we lose sight of who we are, now, we end up doing this extra work, we did so much of the doing, right. So the disruption of the burnout is not just stopped doing, it's a recall, of who you were designed to be. Come on, all you're doing is changing places. So I'm not going to do over here, but I'll overdo over there. I'm not going to do so I think I'm disrupting when really I'm just evolving, grew into more of this false balance. So not over here, but over here, not over there. But over there, not over there, but over just doing in a different location or doing it a different way. So for me, this journey that I'm on it is it this i n g, which would you know, it's the disrupting, present continuous, it is a it is a journey where I am constantly reminding myself of who I am so lead with that. So I'm not doing to gain value. Value is in the fact that God is and I am as he is. Oh, my goodness. I just want to scream. Okay, hold on. Okay. There was a song Donald Lawrence wrote a song called let's get back to Eton and live on that dollarz Is my boy by the way. Yes, yes. And you so you, because when you said Adam was told to name Yeah, he was told to subdue. And he was told to replenish Moulton, have dominion, absolutely have dominion. Yes. I was just having a conversation earlier this week. I tell you, I got my little I'm not gonna call her name, but I got my little furbaby down here. If I call her no, she's gonna want to be a part of our conversation. But one of the things that I learned from her is she wakes up when the sun comes up. Before that, she doesn't cry. She doesn't whine. She doesn't want any attention. She wants to be left alone. She wakes up when the sun comes up, and when the sun goes down, she goes to sleep. It doesn't matter if the TV's on it doesn't matter if a light is on when the sun goes down, okay is out for the night. Okay. It has taught me that we have natural rhythms that were created in us when God created us to keep us safe to keep us healthy. Right we're called the bride and we have completely loud natural rhythms big technology, the lightbulb so now we don't have to go to sleep when the sun goes down because we've got our own light. Right, and Netflix and TV and our new cycles we have developed our burnout might have developed into burnout Right, right the rock bottom Right. So in order to disrupt burnout, in order to have that purpose flow from us, we've got to get back, we've got to go back to who we were originally created to be. Oh, my God, this is so right. This is so powerful. That's right. That's right. And you just blessed me, I have to say that look to what you said, the light bulb, you know, the phones, all of that, right? Social media, right? Yes. And and I think, just in line with this whole notion of Adam, giving the authority to name, right, Adam, those authorities, these are the same same authorities that an entrepreneur has. So I think about him as the first entrepreneur, right. And I also think about how, as an entrepreneur, I'm not just speaking of one who owns an organized business, I'm speaking of one who is the entrepreneur of their lives. And too often, people allow their employer to be the entrepreneur of their lives. So now the employer names, what time you wake up, the employer names, what time you go to bed, the employer names, what time you come in, they name your job description, not just your job description, they name how you are, they name the methodology for how you get the job done. Right. And so I think the disruption is to take that back from whomever it is that we have given it to, you know, people live I often. And that, to me, is true forgiveness. I recall a friend asking me, you know, what is forgiveness to you? And I, you know, I tried to give it the basic, forgive and forget. And she said, I need more. And I, and I've thought about how up the Girl Scouts, right? And how or anybody who is involved with the campaign, a sales campaign, how they will often have a line item. And next to that line item, they'll have a blank line. And you go down the list, and people have created their lives in that way. That's problematic, because they have put my piece and they make somebody responsible for that. And they put my joy, and that's my husband right there. And my security, okay, my, my mom and dad, or my well being, okay, who's that one, and all that got all these things down the line. Some of it is their employee, my financial freedom, my employer, right, and I think forgiveness is to erase all those names. So now, I don't have any expectation of you. Oh, my goodness, this this natural responsibility. Right. Now, that's not to say that people don't add to, you know, to our lives in important and meaningful ways. But it is not your responsibility to design my life so that I don't end up in burnout. Oh, my goodness, that's not your responsibility. And so too much of the, the too much of the of that. Right, that the responsibility. The ownership is given to people outside of God in us. Mm. Oh my god. That's so good. That's so good. I often say that you're your first advocate. You are your first if you don't value you, how do you expect other people absolute value you and taking back that responsibility? Because the truth of the matter is no other human can do it for you anyway. It's an unfair expectation. It really is. And I like I did a post one time that you know, are you looking for a savior among those who need a savior? Come on? How often do people do that though? Is that not real? So Real? is so real, right? Oh, I love that. You equate that to forgiveness. And I appreciate that because I speak with a lot of professionals who are are disappointed, disgruntled, frustrated, not just with their current employer, but with their entire career field? They are sheet. Yes, the sponsorship sheet. You know, check it. Whose name do you have next to that? Because, you know, if you list it someone's name with the expectation that they provide that for you. Yeah. Disappointment is inevitable. So then it's my responsibility to forgive and to heal. Yeah. And to take ownership of your God given authority to name. Right. And that doesn't mean that we can't name in concert with someone. Yeah, right. So I'm an advocate for marriage, it doesn't mean that you name my name. And because we've given been given as individuals rights to name that we can't live in harmony. That's not what I'm saying, as a union, right. However, I'm not coming into this experience with the expectation that you do the work that I should be doing. Now, that is unfair. I'm looking for you for peace, when I should be doing that healing work. Yeah, that's unfair. I've done it, we may have done it. Yes, ma'am. It all goes back to identity is mindset work. You know, we all we often think I need to do something else I need to what's the next thing I need to do? We're always trying to escape to the next thing, right? But the Escape is not going to work. You have to know who you are, if it doesn't start with identity, that everything you build is on shaky ground. It's true. It's true. And that's why, you know, when you asked, as we lead with the podcast, who are you, you know, that was important for me to leave with, with the identity of who I am, and not what I do. Yeah. And again, this is something that I have to remind myself on a daily basis, you know, it's present and continuous, as I said, and I know, it's been a while since I came to you in this way. But I've got something to share with you, you all know that I'm in the process of writing this book. And as I'm doing this, there are strategies and ideas and, and thoughts that are coming to me that I've never had, and I'm so full, I can't wait to get it to you. And the book is coming this year. But I can't wait until then I'm seeing the evidence in my life. And in the lives of folks that I'm coaching one on one. And God has laid it on my heart to create something for folks who may be interested in one on one coaching, but you can't afford it doesn't fit into your budget. Or maybe you're curious about coaching, but you've never had that experience before. This is for folks who feel like you're marching in place. Like you're putting in all the effort, but you're not moving forward, you feel buried, and you're ready to move into brilliance, I'm ready to share out. I've got some strategies, I've got some things to work through with you. Listen, friends, this is not gonna be fancy. There's no fancy sales page. There's no course platform. This is going to be us meeting once a month through zoom, for me to pour out to you what I have and to support you in your journey. That's it. That's it. This is 40, not 40. This is 3030 bucks a month. And there has to be some kind of investment. Or I've learned that people don't show up, right. But at that level, you deserve $30 a month, you can find $30 A month. So if you have wanted to work with me, but just couldn't find it in your budget. If you've been curious about coaching and just not sure if it was a good fit for you. jump in on the HEartwork Academy 2023 I have an even if we work together before a friend you ain't seen this yet. You haven't seen this yet. I am so ready. I'm so thankful. And I'm ready to share with you and I'm ready to support you. Okay. So listen, if you're interested, join with the link here. Fill out the form. Join us in the heart work Academy. We'll kick off in May. We'll meet once a month on Zoom. And we're gonna walk this thing out together. Nothing fancy, but let's just get it done. It's time for you to live in brilliance. You need to know what it means to show up in purpose every day. And I'm ready to help you. All right. I can't wait to hear from you. And I'm excited to serve you. I'll see you soon. Bye, y'all. Let's talk about the continuous for a moment, because I want people to know what you just said is important. This is an on going experience. You don't just disrupt burnout one time, and then you're done. And you never have to see it again, right? We continue on this path. So how do you continue to keep yourself focused on who you are and God, and to stay away from being burnt out and overrun and overwhelmed? A lot of it is environment. Right? So I have come, I am committed to a circle. Right? That's up supports me in my journey, I can tell you that I have friends who lead with conversations, you know, when I call, Hey, beautiful. Yeah, hey, sunshine, right. And I am the same way, whether even if there's some positive expression, they're gonna send me a positive real, something, you know, I thought about you. And, and here's something. So a lot of it is environment. A lot of it is what we consume a lot of it right. There's a whole body of research talking about health, or I'm sorry, brain foods, right, and seeing the relationship between how we think, and what we eat. So I'm working on that as well, it is, it is it is a comprehensive package, right. So I can't just do it over here, I'm not working on it in my health, or I'm in and not working on it in the rest that I get right in or not working on it in physical activity, that is a part of it for me. So all of this, I am designing. And I say I am because it's a it requires my being active in that in the in the, in the work of designing the life that I know is going to be healthy for me, the life that I know is not going to take me to a place of a burnout, that's not going to end that is not going to create a short lived experience of my purpose in the earth. So I'm actively designing that. So the continuous is my commitment to be active in the process of designing that life? And I say what should it either happens by default, or by design? So if you don't design it, then you gotta live with it in default? Oh, my gosh. Yeah. And let me tell you, that has been very important for me on this journey. I was thinking about breakfast this morning. And I asked myself, you know, I understand that what I do right now, the life I create, or design right now in the selection of the foods that I put in this skillet, right? It's going to, it's going to lead to a particular outcome. I don't design it, then there are people who are counting on the on the default. So you got health systems, right available, screen design a life of health, you've got counselors who are waiting for us to end up in burnout and then need that level of resuscitation. I don't want to call it support. I'm talking about resuscitation. Right. And in this life, and I tend to think of it is, you know, we have the preventative. We have the curative. And then we got the resuscitative we've gotten so bad that you don't kill yourself, I mean, that should have voluntarily committed or in some cases, unknowingly, just killed yourself. And now you need somebody that come along. Now you need. Whereas in one instance, we could have had a doctor PBJ, right to come along with the preventive for preventative. And then we could have had a doctor PBJ to come along even in the curative. And then because we dismissed the value of what she was offering now we need somebody to now we need a Jesus to come along with you up from the dead. Yes, I'm saying. So I say that because that is important in terms of how we design our lives. We have the opportunity to make these choices. And every choice that we make today is going to have continuous. So you talk about how do we work that how does the continuous work All right, well, how do we continue to do the work? I don't even want to say do the work. But how do we allow this continuum to flow in our lives, part of it is understanding that what I do right now is going to have a lasting impact. Necessarily, in doing as, as much as it is, in understanding that what I do, is going to have a lasting impact. So, you know, it's not that I got to do today, and do tomorrow and do the next day, sometimes I can do something right now. Or be intentional about the choice I make right now. And understand that if I, if I execute right now, in a healthy way, or if I execute out of the identity of the I Am, then that's going to have lasting impact. I'll at least have it as a point of reference, if nothing else, you see what I did, I got some to recall. And I'm gonna give you another because I told you that that's who I am now. When I think about Jesus on the cross, and the two thieves that were there with him, and I and what the vast it, I think it was two things. Yeah. The fast when you enter into your kingdom, remember me. And for me, it was not just think about me, but to remember, think about the difference between this member and re member. So this member is disconnected from purpose, disconnected from from the identity of who I'm called to be in the earth. So remember, for me, and disrupting burnout, is to reconnect me to my divine purpose. It's not just oh, oh, I had a thought about or I considered that again. No, no, no, no, no, remember, it got to be deeper than that. Because when you get to a place of burnout, the healing is in reconnecting to our true identity. So remembered, because burnout is to be dismembered purpose. That's the way you know, as I think about it, burnout is dismembered from purpose. This member from the identity of the I Am, and I got to do jack else, come on, I'm still that I don't have to do anything else. I still have value. I don't have to do anything else. My life is still worth living. I don't have to do anything else I have meaning in this earth and space. Any significant to the human experience. And anything outside of that we've been dismembered and we need we need to be remembered. Remember? remembered? Yeah. Can you talk about how we do that? And that is, that is why I said so much of this environment. I can recall how when I was going to FIU, Florida International University, and my mom was an administrator there. And at the time, I didn't, I want my relationship with my mom was so pleasant. I didn't like it at all, however, and she knew it. And so I was struggling. Right. I was upset because I got to go to FIU. Right? Cuz I flunked out at Valdosta sheets, they look, love you bringing your butt home. I was angry, you know, I'm somewhere I don't want to be. But every morning she would say to me, the Lord has perfected everything concerning you. And I close the door, whatever. And the next morning, the Lord has perfected everything concerning you. And I close the door one day that then took root. So environment is important. You know, there was I got to be driving from home to FIU with my mom and I got to hear her speaking positivity over my life and and declare in favor on my life. She would say favor is your servant. Come on. She was saying things like that to me. She was saying to me you up the head and not the tail. I'm upset now. So I really check in for what she said. But one day, it took root in my awareness. Well, here's the thing. It was taking root before I was aware, yes. But it took root in my awareness. And I started to think, Wait a minute. So everything concerning me is perfected. Wait a minute, that God has done that. And look, I went through a whole mat rich, forgetting it. reverting back to the doing talk to us. You understand what I'm saying? And so again, these experiences in our lives, these valleys that we you know, and places that we sometimes find ourselves, whether it's unhealthy relationships, whether it's jobs, sometimes they are instruments, oh, this, this is good. They are instruments of dismemberment. Come on. But healing, if it's a children's bread, you hear me, so we are in the midst of the dismemberment. There is a God who loves us and say, Look, I care too much about you to leave you in that place. Let me reconnect you to purpose. And let's do let's root you in purpose. It's one thing that just be connected, right. But these instruments of dismemberment, if you just connect it, you know lightly gave you just hanging on by a thread. Right? There's the possibility of dismemberment again. And and it happens, listen, you know, who was there? Who was that? It wasn't surely Ralph, they say, How did you get here? nobody's supposed to be. Here, so you find yourself sometimes repeating a cycle. And so again, we got to get rooted in purpose, so that the likelihood of burnout? Is it, we lessen the chances of that? Yeah, and I'm talking it, but it's first to me too, you know, you reminding myself that I have to make sure that I'm in the environment, where, where my purpose is affirmed, I have to make sure of that. I have to make sure that I provide that for other women who may be looking to me for that. So I bring on the Dr. PBJ. Come on Dr. PBJ, you know, talk to us, I have I in and so I'm very particular about your my environment, and the environment that I create for others who are relying on me as an example. Right? Not as a sponsor of their peace, but as an example of what this can look like for their life. No, you're not. Never Dr. PBJ, Dr. PBJ. First of all, let me just, I need to receive, I need to receive that word that your mother spoke to you that God has perfected everything, everything concerning me, and you want to know something. So if God has perfected everything concerning you, and leave you for a second to just absorb, then where is the flaw is in this the flaw is really a false ideology. That is inherent in the dismemberment. So without connected the purpose, then I can experience the perfection that God has done concerning me. And I'm, I'm not I don't speak of perfection as in won't make a mistake not needing to be corrected or adjustments. But I mean, as a lifestyle as a way of life and acid identity. That's different. Right? So if he has perfected everything concerning me, where is the flaw? When I see people talking about you know, I'm bracing myself flaws and all. That's problematic. Come on for me. Because it perfects it, I don't have any flaws. And I know that that is like that people might find that hard to understand, in the same way that I couldn't understand that I was Christ in the same way that you know, so people have a problem with understanding that we have everything we need, that we are enough. You know, because of floss says something else needs to be added, something else needs to be done. And I think we have to be watchful of these cliches that we that people sometimes embrace, that are really of the world of, of the world of dismemberment and the world of burnout. So you're steadily trying to do more, if there's a flaw, that means I gotta do something. No. Dr. PBJ I have decided that by the grace of God, I know, give me God, give me what he says about me. Said what do you say it was be perfect. As I am perfect, you are enough. Nothing else needs to be added. Nothing, you understand what I'm saying? And, you know, I started thinking about that. You know, and even and there's so many stories you said to just go hold all you can tell this is sites. But this this is this is this is beautiful. The conversation. I don't see this as a podcast, I see this as shared sisterhood. Yes. And other people get to listen to our conversation, they get the benefit of that. But I see this as as just sister girls talking, you know, and not just talking but the engaging in meaningful, wholesome, healthy healing, healing exchange. See what I'm saying? I recall, on July 14, it was the day before my birthday. And I started having a moment and nothing could satisfy me. I wanted sugar. Just wanted sugar. Like, where's the cake? My dad cheese, some donuts? Please can I have chocolate? And I just sat for a moment and said God was gonna what's happening to me right now. And God spoke to me and said, This is not unfamiliar to you, you know exactly what's going on. I recalled when I would be in relationships, and what I felt rejected. I would resort to comfort foods. Get in my car and dry. Dry to Chris Krispy Kreme. Yes, ma'am. For Hot donuts now. Right now. I'll take a dozen of your glazed flip. Right. Oh, okay. You You don't like me, bro. All right, man. This Krispy Kreme donut we got to work it out. Cuz it always likes me. So, I said wait a minute. In that moment on July 14. God really did speak to me and said how can you be rejected? When you are accepted in the Beloved. Wait, wait went through. How can you be rejected? When in me you are the biller? The only time you can be rejected is when you step out of your Divine Self. Oh, shoot. I had to give that thing some thought. Do you know that the PBJ Do you know when I when I came to that awakening and that understanding and place of enlightenment? Do you know I have not had that experience since because I know. I can identify you baby. See? No we don't. We don't embrace we don't embrace we don't do rejection? Uh huh. No, I'm accepted in the Beloved. Okay you understand what I'm no no, no, no, we don't do rejection. Below the here's the here's what you did. Dr. Ritchey. This is so important. Because here disruptive burnout. We talk about what is your tail te L L? What is your tail? What is your sign on your symptom that you need to pay attention to because most of the time when we found ourselves in burnout, there have been signs along the way. But we have ignored the signs or we haven't paid attention right So in that moment, right in that in that moment, and that craving, which I'm very familiar with, instead of focusing on the craving, you said, Wait a minute, what is this? What is I noticed the tail, but it's telling me something, okay? Your tail tells you something. Okay? So by acknowledging the tail, you recognize that this ain't about sugar. This is about rejection. And then you took the lie that rejection was trying to tell you, and you replaced it with the truth. You said, I'm not rejected. I am accepted because I am the biller. That's right. And that is the process when we talk about the IMG. That is the process, you got to recognize the size body, your soul, your spirit speaks to you. And it lets you know when you are in crisis, when something is not aligned, we're not in the right place. And when we pay attention to that sign, and we question it, why are you here? How did you get here? Nobody. When you recognize the lie that he's trying to tell you, you replace that lie with the truth. That's right. And the truth makes you free. And that's why you haven't had that experience. Right? That's right. That's right. No, you guys are not here. Not here. Not here. Yeah, Dr. Ritchey, listen, this. We can go on and we can go but we got to let the people go. Okay. Tell them how can they hear more from you, connect with you? Because I know that there are people who said Look, I need to find this woman I need to listen to her. So how do they follow you and hear more from them? I would of course I'm on Facebook, Dr. Alicia Ritchey name as it spelled on the screen. You can also check out my website a rich, that would be a r i t c h at a ritch enterprise AR I tch enterprise.com are ritch at a ritch enterprise. And part of what I talk about in designing is what I do with women who are interested in business, helping them design a business that doesn't lend to burnout, helping them design a business that doesn't lend to them throwing in the towel to say I'd give up helping them design a business where we identify purpose. And what's your call to do and, and how you can serve out of purpose and the identity of, of, of God's expression of excellence in the air. And while I don't. It's while it's not considered a faith based business, I am a faith based believer and so everything I touch, has elements of the expression of God in or is the expression of God. Absolutely. Absolutely. Listen, I know after this time together, that you all are set on fire and you can begin to see the dismembering experiences of your life and you are recognizing where you need to be remembered and reconnected to purpose and your true identity and being the beloved of God and I know that this is going to bring healing. I know it's going to bring deliverance but I also know that it's going to bring forth purpose. So I am so excited that you all have joined us for this conversation. And you need to connect with Dr. Ritchey. You need to follow her on Facebook you need to reach out to her so that you can experience more of the God in her daughter Richie, thank you so much for joining us as always. Thank you forever. Friends, as always, you know that you are powerful. You are significant. And you are loved. Love always PBJ See you next time