Chapter 1: I Was Born for This (Disrupting Burnout by Dr. Patrice Buckner Jackson audiobook)

As a former Dean of Students, I've endured the heartache that comes with loss and crisis. I recall the catastrophic loss of several nursing students and the profound impact it had on our community. This episode is a deeply personal account, a journey through grief and leadership, as I take you through the immediate response, the emotional burden of informing loved ones, and the resilience of our university family. It's a poignant testament to the role of presence and empathy in the darkest of times, and a reminder of the strength found in collective support.

In our conversation, the spotlight turns to the spark that resides within each of us—our innate brilliance. I invite you to consider your "brilliance," the indelible influence you're destined to leave on the world. As I share insights into recognizing and embracing your divine gifts, we ponder the importance of submitting these gifts for guidance, ensuring they enrich rather than encumber our lives. This chapter is an inspiring call to harness the unique talents bestowed upon us and to let them illuminate not just our paths, but the lives of those we touch.

Addressing the ever-present threat of burnout, I introduce a vital resource: the Disrupting Burnout Journal. This tool is designed to guide you through a transformational process of reflection and action, empowering you to reclaim your vitality and purpose. By becoming a student of truth and engaging with the HeartWork strategies provided, you're invited to make a profound change in your life. This episode is more than a narrative—it's a manual for personal evolution, urging you to take each activity to heart and reflect on the essence of your influence.

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Chapters

• 0:00 Born for Crisis
• 16:58 Embracing Your Unique Brilliance
• 30:17 The Power and Purpose of Brilliance
• 36:44 Disrupting Burnout Journal for Transformation

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:00

Chapter 1, I was born for this. As Dean of Students at a University, part of my job was to respond to and manage student crisis. However, no professional development workshop, graduate course or textbook could have prepared me for the tragedy we faced on that April day in 2015. Friend, let me pause here for a spoonful of PBJ. If you are my student or my colleague from Georgia Southern University and you were with us in April 2015, I want to encourage you to take care of yourself as I tell this story. If you are my colleague in student affairs or in higher education and you have faced student tragedy, I want to encourage you to take care of yourself. If you've lost someone that you love in a tragic way, I want to encourage you to take care of yourself. This story is difficult to tell and it is difficult to hear, but I believe it is necessary. So, friend, take care of yourself. Here we go.

Speaker 1: 1:27

My day was dedicated to meeting with a group of students protesting in the president's office. Everyone on my team knew these students were my priority of the day. I'd set aside several hours to prepare for them, meet with them and listen to them. My staff knew to hold calls and triage all other concerns so I could focus on those students. I sincerely desired to support them and facilitate communication between them and University administration. We gathered in a conference room down the hall from my office suite to have some separation from the floor of the office. As the students shared their concerns, my executive assistant came to the glass door and motioned for me to come out. I must admit I was a bit frustrated. What in the world could be more important than this? I asked the students to excuse me and disdain colored their faces as I made my way to the hall. My assistant started with an apology. Then she explained chief called. She needs you at University Police right now. Did she say what she needed? No, ma'am, she just said you need to come right now. I took a deep breath and walked back into the conference room. I am so sorry. I set aside my day for you all but something has come up. I have to go. But Ms Kim will get you all rescheduled on my calendar as soon as possible. Please know I wouldn't leave if I didn't absolutely have to.

Speaker 1: 3:15

I gathered my things and headed over to the University Police Department. As soon as I entered the building I was ushered to a back conference room filled wall-to-wall with police officials. Some were from our campus police department and others from different agencies. Some talked on their phones while others held conversations in small groups. I had no idea what was happening, but I felt it was going to be a bad day. I found a seat and waited for the chief. She eventually came over with a list of names. I need you to find out if these people were in class today. I could feel this was no time to ask questions, so I took the list and got to work. I pulled up our information system, accessed class schedules and phone numbers and started calling professors to inquire about their attendance records for the day. Some hesitated to share without more information about why I needed to know. Others seemed to have an idea something was going on and shared freely. I kept calling until I got enough information for the chief. It wasn't long before I put the context clues together.

Speaker 1: 4:36

This day wasn't just bad, it was tragic. We needed more space and we needed to be close to the impact of the tragedy. So we eventually moved the whole operation to our School of Nursing. Seven nursing students had been involved in a deadly car crash on their way to their last day of clinicals. Five students died that day, two were critically injured and we didn't know if they would make it. I went from helping the police make positive identifications to working with our communications team to determine how in the world we were going to share this news with our university community.

Speaker 1: 5:25

One of the most difficult moments of the day was breaking the news to a father over the phone. Word had begun to spread and something in his heart knew his child was involved. He called the university several times but no one could give him an update until we were sure the moment we had a positive ID. The chief gave me permission to call him. Sir, I'm Dr Patrice Jackson, dean of Students at the University. It sounds like you're driving. Can you pull over for a minute? I waited until I was sure he had stopped. What is your daughter's name? I held my breath until he responded. What's her birth date? I close my eyes, sir, I'm so sorry.

Speaker 1: 6:19

After spending some time on the phone with the student's father and getting a family member to meet him on the road, I moved to a large auditorium classroom where 200 nursing students and their faculty members were waiting for details. My voice quivered and my friend, the director of counseling on campus held my hand as I read the names of the five students who had died and the two who were injured. Sobs and gasp and shrieks filled the room. There wasn't much more to say at that moment. Sometimes we just need to hold space with people. In times like these, words are inadequate. So you just sit. Your presence is all you can give. It's not enough. Nothing is enough, but presence is something. It is significant.

Speaker 1: 7:19

I couldn't stay in that space long because by this time news crews were showing up on our campus. I was ushered from that room to an area where the cameras were set up. I was assigned to speak on behalf of the university. On my way to meet the cameras, I walked past our university president, who had been with us all day. He demonstrated an example of true leadership that day. He was there, but he didn't take over. He made space for each of us to do our work. He trusted our experience. He supported us and stayed close. In case we needed him, he was there. I will always be grateful for that. On my way to meet the news reporters, our president gently grabbed my arm and said Patrice, thank you. Without hesitation I said, sir, I was born for this. I didn't have time to think about my response. I just kept moving. We went from the news interviews to Greek Ro, because each of the women who died that day was a member of a different sorority. My colleagues and I visited all five houses just to hold space with those women. Friends gathered on the street and surrounded the women's, significant others on the front lawns, roommates, siblings and parents gathered on our campus. It was the worst day of my entire career. There was much to do in the days following the tragedy. Honestly, we continued to support students, parents, siblings and the community for months and years to come.

Speaker 1: 9:07

When I reflect on that day, as I often do, I think about my response to the president. Sir, I was born for this. Where did that come from? Why did that response come out of me? I know it was pure, because I had nothing else to offer that day but truth. No one wants to face such a day. No one desires to be there, but somehow I knew I was supposed to be there After fighting through burnout and supporting other women through it. I understand my response so much better now. In that moment, my heart had identified something my mind was not aware of yet. My heart knew I was made for. Crisis. It's my thing. It's what I do well. It's what I have always done. It's what I was born for. Crisis is my shine. It's my light. Crisis is my brilliance.

Speaker 1: 10:12

I have an innate, unique brilliance for connecting with people who are struggling and helping them find the light again. When I look back over my life, this is something I have always done, from childhood to this very day. I am the person you call when your life is falling apart. I am the person you call when you cannot see your way through. I am the person you call when you don't know what else to do. Although my brilliance positions me to be exposed to and involved in some tough situations, I have never felt more alive.

Speaker 1: 10:54

Standing securely in my brilliance ended a lifelong search for significance. Without a keen awareness of my brilliance, I spiraled into low self-esteem, imposter syndrome, overworking, overwhelm and burnout. Obtaining the highest degree did not fill the void. Being promoted to the highest position left me lacking. Even having my gifts recognized in church was not enough. The constant struggle to find my place in the world led me to rock bottom burnout. But discovering my brilliance freed me to live in power and impact. Without performing.

Speaker 1: 11:39

Friend, there is no replacement for you and the brilliance you were created to pour into the world. No other person can fill your specific shoes. In discovering your brilliance, you will unlock supernatural treasure that blesses the world and fulfills your deepest longing for identity. There's treasure in you. If you're wondering if you have brilliance, the answer is yes. Every living breathing human being is assigned to this earth with a gift from God. You are here on purpose and for purpose. There is no life without God. So, regardless of the circumstances of your birth, you're supposed to be here and you have a treasure inside you.

Speaker 1: 12:31

The apostle Paul taught the church at Ephesus for we are God's handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works which God prepared in advance for us to do. Ephesians 2 and 10, new International Version. This verse proves God created us as his masterpiece to do work he already had in mind. He had plans for you before you took your first breath. Friend Paul continues to teach in 2 Corinthians 4 and 7. We now have this light shining in our hearts, but we ourselves are like fragile clay jars containing this great treasure. This makes it clear that our great power is from God, not from ourselves.

Speaker 1: 13:25

I love the way this verse illuminates the fact that we are all like clay jars, made of dirt, fragile, not worth much without the light of God that shines through us. He is the treasure within, through his spirit. Each of us carries a specific brilliance that illuminates the world around us. He made us with his very hands to carry his light on the earth. Each of us has a piece of him that the world needs to experience. There's treasure in you, friend. Your treasure is that innate, unique brilliance you were created to bring to the world. Every person has it. Some people call this their purpose. Your purpose is your brilliance and when you move in purpose, you share that brilliance with the world. Becoming aware of your innate, unique, specific brilliance is the most powerful catalyst of transformation.

Speaker 1: 14:31

Discovering my God-given one-of-a-kind purpose freed me to be me. Much of my burnout experience was tied to people pleasing, trying to be all things to all people. I no longer contort myself to fit into boxes and definitions created by other people. Discovering my brilliance allows me to show up in wholeness and healing. I focus less on what I do and more on who I am. I accept I am a human being, not a human doing. Focusing on my being increases my impact on the world around me. My heart is free, my mind is clear and my power has increased. I'm here for a reason and I know what I'm here to do.

Speaker 1: 15:27

Did you know you're brilliant? No really, friend, I need you to hear me. You are absolutely brilliant. How do I know? You were created by a brilliant God and that brilliant God made you in his own image. Genesis 1 and 27.

Speaker 1: 15:50

During her permission nights tour at Forward City Church in Columbia, south Carolina, dr Jackie Green, author of Permission to Live Free, shared that we must begin to see ourselves as God is. We often identify that we believe we are not. Dr Jackie shared many people say I am not creative, but if God is creative, you are creative. You were made in his image and his spirit lives in you. If he is strong, you are strong. If he is resourceful, you are as well. If he is brilliant, so are you. If he made the birds of the air and the flowers of the field brilliantly, how much more did he pour into you? Matthew 6, verses 26 through 34. You are his masterpiece, shaped to look like him and to be like him. This is Brilliant.

Speaker 1: 16:58

Your purpose is not your job description or your job title. You do not need to wait until you get to a certain level in your life to identify your purpose. Purpose is not about recognition, accolades or promotions. Your purpose is brilliance. It is the genius on the inside of you. Your purpose is the innate, unique brilliance you bring to the world. Your brilliance is innate. You can't earn it and you did not learn it. Your brilliance is specifically given to you by God. It's God expressed through you in the earth. This brilliance has been with you for your entire life.

Speaker 1: 17:41

Brilliance is in you, even if you can't quite see it yet. Brilliance comes through you every day because you can't help it. Brilliance flows from you without you giving thought to it. It is your gift, it is your thing, it is your shine, it is your purpose. Something beautiful happens as you do this work. You begin to emerge wholly as the woman God created you to be. In that space, your brilliance is undeniable. Where it used to seep out of you when you were cluttered, brilliance pours from you as you step into freedom. Your purpose will shine forth as you allow God to heal your heart and set you free. The brilliance will be undeniable. You will see yourself as the woman God specifically designed for a specific work on the earth. The light of God's glory will shine forth in such a brilliant way that everyone in your path will be impacted. Your brilliance is freely given to you by your Creator in heaven. It is your spiritual DNA. Brilliance is the way you look like the Father and share His love in the world.

Speaker 1: 19:03

Your brilliance is unique. There is no other just like yours. The same God who numbered the very hairs of your head, also created you with a unique, specific gift, unlike anyone else's Luke, chapter 12, verse 7. Yenneke Mackey, pastor of Chosen Church and CEO of Purpose Fueled Leader, teaches we all have a purpose print, according to Yenneke, just like your fingerprint is unlike any other persons, your purpose print is unique to you alone. You may do similar work, but you will never do it just like another person. There are thousands of gifted singers in the world, but no one will be Whitney Houston ever again. This isn't just about her sound, but, more importantly, it's about the impact she made on our hearts as she flowed in her gift. You may be a teacher, but the impact of your teaching is different. You may be a minister, but the impact of your ministry is unlike anyone else's, even if you serve the same demographic of people, no matter what you do to serve, no one else will have the exact impact you have.

Speaker 1: 20:32

Your brilliance is holy. In 1st Peter 1 and 16, believers are reminded that we are to be holy as God is holy. The original Greek term for holy in this verse is Adios, which means set apart, revered, sacred and worthy of veneration. Holy means to be other or unique. Your brilliance is sacred. Your brilliance is like no other. This is why it's important for you to discover your brilliance. No one else in the world can bring forth your specific gift like you can. The world needs you to be fully you. There is no adequate alternative. You're the woman sis. It's your superpower and your kryptonite.

Speaker 1: 21:34

My husband Edward is a fan of comic book heroes. He and our daughter enjoy following the journeys of superhuman characters who always somehow save the world. I am not a fan, but I can't help but be exposed to these stories in my house. As I consider your brilliance, my mind goes to the storyline of the X-Men franchise created by Stan Lee. In this story, professor Charles Xavier leads an academy of young superheroes who got their powers through different genetic mutations. The goal of the academy is to teach the young mutants how to manage their powers. Without the training, they would be ineffective at the least and destructive at their worst. However, with the wisdom of Professor X, a mutant himself, this team of flawed supernatural beings navigate, balancing the power of their gifts with the challenges that come from being extraordinarily gifted. They learn to live in the duality of possessing brilliance.

Speaker 1: 22:51

The same lesson is imperative for you. Your brilliance is your greatest strength and your greatest stumbling block. It is the thing that sets you apart and the thing that can rip you apart if you're not careful to allow God to be your guide. It is your superpower and your kryptonite In the amazing weight. Author and preacher Marissa Farrow describes this duality of being called to greatness. She shares how, just as the miracle of motherhood comes with the pain of the push, your mission comes with great joy and great trial. Your brilliance can bring freedom to others and bondage to you if you're not careful. My brilliance of supporting others through their crisis also created my great fall to burn out. I am anointed to support people through their trials and I must have boundaries in my life to ensure I do not over extend myself for the sake of others. You have a unique brilliance that impacts the world around you, and that same brilliance has a shadow side that can produce negative results for you if you are not submitted and obedient to God.

Speaker 1: 24:17

Keep your brilliance in check by remembering its source. God is your source. Everything else is a resource. Brilliance comes from him and must be maintained through him. The brilliance you carry is so magnificent that it cannot be sustained through human logic. It is so powerful that you yourself could be consumed by it. If you do not allow God to manage it, he will tell you who, how and when to serve. He will assign passions and remove them as he sees fit. He will tell you to do a certain work in one season and to leave that same work in a different season. God created you for your brilliance and he knows how to manage it. The only way to consistently show up in your brilliance is to continually return to him for refreshing and refueling. He will manage this massive gift if you submit it back to him. Trust God to guide, direct and instruct you in how to use your brilliance so it remains a blessing to others and to you. I'll show you exactly what that looks like in my life and how you can do it as well. He said what he said. God gifted you before you decided to love him. He gave you brilliance before you gave him your heart.

Speaker 1: 25:51

Growing up in church, I often heard church folks say the gifts of God are without repentance, a paraphrase of Romans 11 and 29. It took some personal study for me to understand this verse In the New Living Translation. The verse reads For God's gifts and his call can never be withdrawn. In this passage, the Apostle Paul explained that the people of Israel will always be God's chosen people, even when they do not believe in Jesus. God's promise to their ancestors does not change based on their decisions, beliefs or behavior. In the same way, the brilliance God placed inside you is yours and it is powerful, whether you believe in him or not.

Speaker 1: 26:39

This point is further supported by the Prophet Jeremiah in Jeremiah 1 and 5, where he proclaimed on behalf of God I knew you before I formed you in your mother's womb, before you were born. I set you apart and appointed you as my prophet to the nations. God did not wait to see who we would be or what behavior we would choose once here on earth. He made his mind up about us before we could choose any action. He decided to love you and to believe in you before you could perform, impress or achieve anything. Every moment of your life was planned with care, according to Psalm 139, verses 13 through 18,. You made all the delicate inner parts of my body and knit me together in my mother's womb. Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex. Your workmanship is marvelous. How well I know it. You watch me as I was being formed in utter seclusion, as I was woven together in the dark of the womb. You saw me before I was born. Every day of my life was recorded in your book. Every moment was laid out before a single day had passed. How precious are your thoughts about me, oh God, they cannot be numbered. I can't even count them. They outnumber the grains of sand. And when I wake up you are still with me. Friend, let's stop for a spoon full of PBJ.

Speaker 1: 28:30

As I read that scripture from Psalm 39, my mind goes to the circumstances of my birth and how I was born to a 15-year-old mom, how my father was young as well and afraid, and decided he needed to do different things with his life. We'll say more about that later, but I remember as a young child carrying some shame. As my mom married my stepdad and brother and sister came along, I always knew I was different. And to think about a 15-year-old child having to make a decision of whether she would continue with the pregnancy or how she would take care of a baby. And to read this verse to say, even in a 15-year-old womb, god, he knit me together and he watched over me, even while I was in the womb of a 15-year-old and how I am not a mistake. My birth is not a mistake. My conception is not a mistake, regardless of how I got here. I was supposed to be here, and the same is true for you, regardless of how you got here, and I honor your story. I know that there are some painful stories out there, but regardless of what brought you here, you're supposed to be here and you are absolutely brilliant. Let's get back to the story. To put it in today's language he said what he said.

Speaker 1: 30:17

God will not change his mind about you or your gift, regardless of what you do. Yes, you will experience more power if you submit to him. Yes, it is dangerous to pursue purpose without the guidance of the one who gave it to you. He created you for the purpose, so he knows how it works best. Yes, the impact of your purpose will increase exponentially if you submit to the power of God's spirit. He adds the super to your natural and it's seen power until you allow God's creative power to move freely in your brilliance. All of that is true, but it is also true that nothing can stop your purpose from flowing, not even you.

Speaker 1: 31:07

Gang leaders, psychic healers and con men all use their brilliance. They were created with brilliance and God will not take it back. By giving us free will, he leaves room for us to decide how we will use what he gave us. He allows room for us to experience the consequences of our choices. He made you for your brilliance and he will not take it away from you. Your brilliance is a perfect fit. Your brilliance is a perfect fit for you. Although brilliance will cost you something, it should not cost you everything. The innate, unique brilliance God prepared for you is specifically designed to fit you. You can do things that would overwhelm other people. You are capable of accomplishing goals that would never work for the next person. God specifically designed your personality and crafted your life to carry the specific brilliance he assigned to you.

Speaker 1: 32:17

In the new living translation of our foundational scripture. Jesus said Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls, for my yoke is easy to bear and the burden I give you is light. Matthew 11, verses 28-30. Growing up in church, I heard this verse many times, but I never truly understood the power of it until I understood what a yoke is.

Speaker 1: 33:02

A yoke is a piece of farming equipment that connects two animals together for the purpose of tilling the soil. The yoke is used to train them as well as to connect them to their purpose. The yoke is fastened over the necks of the animals and then connected to the plow or cart they are assigned to pull. The yoke assists in carrying the weight of the plow or cart. To protect the animals, the yoke must be well fitted. Plowing is not a punishment for the animals. They are too valuable to the farmer to be abused. Plowing is their purpose. It is what they were born to do. Therefore, the farmer carefully fits the appropriate yoke to each animal, adjusting as they grow so they can do the work they were born to do without overextending or injuring themselves.

Speaker 1: 34:06

In the same way, your brilliance is crafted specifically to fit you and to assist you in carrying the weight of your assignment. In the same passage, where Jesus referred to the yoke, he also talked about rest. We are created to rest and work. The only way for these two activities to successfully exist together is for you to submit to the yoke. Jesus gives you the brilliance assigned to you. Jesus said my yoke is easy to bear and the burden I give you is light. Matthew 11, verse 30. Friend, I am convinced if the burden is heavy, it's not what God gave you. If you're overloaded and overwhelmed, you are carrying something God did not assign to your shoulders. The brilliance God assigned to you fits perfectly and the load is light. That same load will crush someone else, but you are built for it. God values you too much to give you something that weighs too much for you to carry. You are too valuable to him to be impaired. The brilliance God assigned to you is a perfect fit To bring quick relief to an overwhelmed society.

Speaker 1: 35:29

Burnout experts often offer band-aid-level solutions to an area where deep trauma has occurred. Disrupting burnout is not a shot-in-the-dark quick fix. It's a lifestyle shift that brings purpose and freedom. We disrupt burnout through the heart work strategies Three simple but powerful strategies that reveal and heal the root causes of burnout, launching you into a life of purpose and fulfillment. In the following chapters you will become so acquainted with the heart work strategies that they'll be ingrained into your being. Truth shared in these pages will free you from the habits that lead to overwhelming burnout. Do not read this book like a novel. Use it as a manual, bookmark it, dog-ear the pages, write notes in the margin and highlight lines. This book will hold your stains and your tears. Use it so well that no one will ever want to borrow it.

Speaker 1: 36:44

Download the Disrupting Burnout Journal at patricebuttnerjaxsoncom slash journal to support your journey. Take the time to work through the exercises, contemplate the questions and write out your answers. Note the thoughts that resonate with you on an index card and keep it in your purse. Ask questions, Think critically, become a student of truth. So you can be free. In addition to journal prompts and questions within the chapters, at the end of each chapter I'll invite you to do the heart work. Each activity was created for you to apply the heart work strategies. As you take this journey. I encourage you to slow down and complete each exercise Pause to answer each journal question.

Speaker 1: 37:45

This is not a book to be read. This is a manual to be practiced. The power of this journey is in the application of the strategies. Let's begin. Do the heart work. When was the last time you felt like you truly made a positive impact on another person? Number one what did you do? Number two what was the impact on the other person or other people? Number three what was the outcome of that experience? Write about this experience in your downloadable disrupting burnout journal found at patricebucknerjaxsoncom.