Disrupting Burnout

135. Finding Harmony: Steps to Reset Your Life's Rhythm

Dr. Patrice Buckner Jackson Episode 135

Access the free resource- The S.T.O.P. Plan: Your Guide to a More Sustainable Rhythm of Life

Ever found yourself stuck in an endless loop of tasks, yearning for a moment to breathe? Join me, Dr. Patrice Buckner-Jackson, affectionately known as PBJ, on the Disrupting Burnout podcast as we unlock the secret to breaking free through a transformative "rhythm reset." Discover how an intentional pause, distinct from a typical vacation, can help recalibrate your life’s pace and combat burnout. I'll share personal insights from my sabbatical journey, where I initially faced the anxiety of doing nothing, and how tools like the Dwell app can bring spiritual peace, reflection, and a sustainable life rhythm.

The conversation continues with a deep dive into the liberating power of self-care and decluttering. Imagine clearing not just your physical spaces but also your mental clutter, leading to clarity and emotional refreshment. Inspired by Mel Robbins, I reflect on my past year through my photo library, finding gratitude and setting intentional goals for a more balanced life. From managing foot care routines to finding joy in fresh flowers and strengthening connections with loved ones, this episode is your invitation to disrupt burnout and embrace a life filled with purpose and balance. If you're ready to reset your rhythm and find fulfillment in life's simple pleasures, this journey is for you.

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Speaker 1:

What do you want to start, what do you want to stop and what do you want to continue? And this really set the pace for me to start this year intentionally. Hey friend, welcome back to the Disrupting Burnout podcast, where we are giving you the strategies for pouring out purpose without continuing to live in the consequences of burnout. Listen, if you are new here, I'm Dr Patrice Buckner-Jackson, but you can call me PBJ, and it's my honor to serve you. Friend, we're getting right into it because last week I introduced to you this idea of a rhythm reset. One of the reasons why you find yourself overwhelmed, you find yourself under burnout, is because the rhythm of your life is so overwhelming and so anxious and so fast paced. You're going from one thing to another and you can barely keep your mind still where you are because you're already 10 paces ahead. Right, so you're trying to do one thing, but you're thinking about the next 15 things that have to be done. Friend, that constant barrage of demands and overwhelm and that thought stream is going to drive you to the depths of burnout. So, in order to mitigate, interrupt that process, I'm encouraging you to have a rhythm reset Now. If you are not sure what I mean by rhythm reset. Go back to last week's episode and make sure you listen to watch that one so you can catch up. But in this episode I want to talk you through what I did during and after my stop. So I shared with you last week that the first thing I had to do in order to reset my rhythm is stop. I had to pause because I couldn't even think clearly on what the next step should be. So it was time for a real stop, a real reset. And y'all, let me say this I'm not talking vacation, all right, this was not a let me go check out this place and that place and do this thing and that thing. I don't know about you, but sometimes I've come back from vacation exhausted. This was not vacation. This was intentional pause, stop, reset. So here's some of the things. And I got my phone y'all because I wanted to not forget some of these things. And y'all, when I was walking through this, I didn't have a name for it, I didn't know it was a rhythm reset. It was weeks in before I realized oh wow, I am setting the normal rhythm for my life, I'm resetting my baseline. It was weeks before I realized. This will actually help me determine when I'm getting off off track and what to come back to. So I wasn't doing this with the idea of this is the method I need to take. But afterwards and towards the end, or doing this, I knew I needed to share it with you all, so I got my notes today, the first thing I want to encourage you to do. Last week, I told you how to stop. I want to encourage you to stop and feel. Let me tell you what I mean.

Speaker 1:

For me, nothingness was not good. When I first went away for my sabbatical rest, I thought that sitting and doing nothing was what I needed. But what I found is the nothingness made space for anxious thoughts and overwhelm and considering why am I doing this? Is everybody OK? Are they going to be mad, right? Are they going to be mad, right? So I and this is just me Maybe you have, maybe you have conquered mindfulness and you're able to sit and do nothing and think nothing. But that's, that's not where I am. So what I found is I had to stop, but I also had to feel.

Speaker 1:

So here's some things that I added PBJ, I can't stop. I don't have time to stop. If I stop, all of this falls apart. We're short staffed. I don't have anybody that can take my place at work. I don't have support at home or at work to stop. Friends, if any of these thoughts come to mind when you think about taking a break, you are the person who needs to stop the most. I want to offer you our stop plan. Simple, I want you to use the same strategies and wisdom and skills that you use at work, and I'm going to guide you to using those strategies to plan micro breaks. I'm not talking about a month's sabbatical, but can you incorporate micro breaks into your life as a regular rhythm of rest so that while you are serving, while you are giving, you can have moments of revival, so that you can live the life you're living sustainably? Friend, you need to grab this stop plan. Make sure to click the link in the show notes or wherever you're watching or listening to this, so that you can get what you need right now. It can't wait. I know you do a wonderful job, but people don't know what it costs you to be you, and you know what the cost has been. It's time to stop. Grab the plan today.

Speaker 1:

I started using the Dwell app. I love the Dwell app. The Dwell app is a Bible app where you can read the Bible, but it will also read it to you in the most soothing voices and they have these ambience behind the voices, sounds that bring peace. It has a daily sort of devotional thing that you can listen to and it leads you to breath prayer. I have other Bible apps, but this app has made a difference for me because it brings me peace. So I started using the Dwell app every day and this also gave me some relief of feeling like I had to be a Bible scholar. I had to dig in every day and learn something new Greek and Hebrew words Just the pressure of what it may look like to some to be a good Christian. Using the Dwell app, I was able to stop and reset, even in my relationship with God and to understand that he doesn't need my performance. He's not impressed by it, it's not needed. I am learning to just sit with him, just to be with him and be in his word. So the dwell app has been phenomenal for me.

Speaker 1:

In my stop I also when I came back home. There is a local greenhouse and I love it and I knew it was in our town. We've been here for about five years now. I knew it was there and I had passed it a few times and kept saying, oh, I want to stop there one day. Oh, I want to stop there one day. Well, in this process I went and I went weekly. It is the most lush, beautiful place and I'm so grateful I can just. I don't even have to buy anything. There's a little grocery store that's connected to it. It has locally grown and locally created I don't know goodies in the grocery store. It's the sweetest place to be and it became my sabbatical rest when I'm at home. So if I have time or if I need a moment, I'll stop, get in my car and go, drive to the greenhouse and I'll just walk through. I don't have to say anything to anybody, I can just be in the oxygen and be in the greenery and be in the beauty and learn about new plants I didn't even know existed. So the greenhouse has definitely become a part of my resetting and as often as I can my goal is once a week, but as often as I can I just go and walk through. I just go and be there because it's a place of peace for me.

Speaker 1:

I also set up some therapy appointments. I told you that a boundary of mine is I will always have a therapeutic relationship, but there are some times that I meet with them regularly and sometimes I'm on the road or I'm good and I'm not meeting regularly. And this was a time that I wasn't meeting regularly. But I knew that I needed to. I knew that I needed to, so I reset those appointments and even some new appointments and got back on track with therapy and it was really good for me. I visited family and spent time with friends, and that may seem like a small thing, but when you are constantly running and serving, you feel like, oh, I'm with people all the time but, friend, that's not for you, that's for them. So you need to be with people where it's for you. I had the opportunity to spend time with family and it was refreshing to my soul to be with my people, not just on the phone, not just on FaceTime, but with my people. So I was grateful. I was grateful for that.

Speaker 1:

I brought some new plants into the house. Now listen, this sister over here. She hanging in, but she's not doing too well. So we're going to work on this one, but this one's doing well. I at one time had so many plants in my house and through moving, so we moved for a job and then we moved after my burnout, and through moving several times, in a short amount of time I've given them away and we don't feel like moving all these plants. So I found myself in a space where I really didn't have a lot of plants around me and I loved them and they fueled me. So I brought new plants into my life and I decided that I want more fresh flowers this year.

Speaker 1:

I know I love this may seem simple, but I reset my skincare routine. Let me tell you what I mean. So I had been running so hard that at the end of the day, the most I did was wipe the makeup off my face with a makeup wipe and throw on some moisturizer. And then I'm going to bed and I don't know how I feel about saying that out loud. It feels a little embarrassing, but it's the truth. I had gotten to the point where I don't even have time to do the things that my body needs craves, that relaxes me, that takes care of me and I didn't even realize it had happened. I didn't even realize it had happened before. I just stopped In my time away I was preparing for bed and I thought, you know, I used to have toner and I used to have oils for my face and I don't have any of that because once things ran out, I just didn't replenish them because I was running so hard.

Speaker 1:

So in this time I have reset my skincare routine and I've settled into some products that are clean and comfortable and work well for my skin. And I have a routine. I have my makeup remover, not the wipes anymore A shout out to Jasmine from my glam squad, who told me to stop doing that. I have my cleanser and my toner and my oils and you know, and the things that work for my skin. I have those things and I take time every evening, not just for shower or whatever, but for my skin care.

Speaker 1:

I have a wonderful, wonderful woman in my life who takes care of my pedicures Lisa Utabam. Listen, lisa is everything. Have y'all ever had a laid down pedicure? No, I'm talking laying on a massage bed, warm, with a mask over your eyes, and Lisa is soaking your feet and getting to work to get them feet right. Friend, I'm saying all the things today. This might be too much for some people, but I'm grateful for Lisa.

Speaker 1:

A part of my story is I had surgeries on my feet when I was a child, so I've always struggled concerning my feet and Lisa is the most caring, detailed, sweetest person I've ever encountered. That have made those experiences relaxing for me. But I also recognize that I'm going to see Lisa once a month, right. So in between time, what am I doing for my feet? I'm on my feet constantly. What am I doing to take care of them? So I reset some routines to take care of my feet in between times, so when I go to Lisa she don't have to work as hard, but also I just feel better. I feel better. These are things. This is how you reset your rhythm, friend. What are those small things that mean something to you? It might be your hair care, it might be your meal prep, it might be how you move your body, it might be your meditation time, your quiet time. Friend, where is the low-hanging fruit? Y'all hear Bella. Y'all know she always got to make an appearance. Hey, girl, they hear you, but where is the low hanging fruit for what you can do right now to take care of your body and take care of yourself? So we're resetting our rhythm.

Speaker 1:

I cleared some clutter. Oh, my goodness, it was so good and so refreshing. And you know, sometimes you just get into that mood and the whole house, everything is about to get it. Everything is about to get it when I tell you I went through closets and I went through pantries and I went through cabinets and I went through my office and every room in my house, every room in my house, got a declutter. Every single room, everything with a door, everything with a door, got a declutter up in here. And it has been so refreshing and I find myself more able to think clearly because I don't have the clutter around me. And even when I say clutter, what's cluttered to me might not be cluttered to you.

Speaker 1:

I am a very systematic person. Everything has a place, I know where it is and when I start to build things, keep things. I don't need stacks. That's a sign for me that I'm overwhelmed. And when I tell you I threw out outdated spices, I went through the whole pantry and got rid of everything that was expired. I got rid of appliances. We don't use things that don't work, we reorganize. I'm telling you, this place got decluttered and it has been so good to come home. It's been so good to be at home, to work from home, and I'm not overcrowded by things that I don't need. It's not just about the physical environment, but as you are cleaning up your physical environment, it also helps you mentally, spiritually and emotionally.

Speaker 1:

And the last thing I'll give you today from resetting my rhythm, I got this from Mel Robbins and Mel shared how each year she opens up her phone and goes to her photos and she reviews the pictures from the last year. So if I open up my phone and I go to my photos and most of us live by our photos these days and I search through by, let's say, search through by months, right, I go back to January 2024 and February 2024 and March 2024. And I went through those pictures. One to remind me. It allowed me to have so much gratitude, the way that the year ended. I have found myself in a place where I'm like throw the whole year away, like let's come on 2025. I probably should have slowed down, but anyway, come on 2025. Throw the whole year away. But what I found is the overwhelm had crowded my view and perspective of what the year was. It might sound silly, but I literally opened those photos and said, I published a book in January, my first book. I did a book tour in January, february and March.

Speaker 1:

It's amazing how you forget things because of the season that you're currently in. So Mel talks about going back through those photos and finding things that you're grateful for. That was so good for me to identify things that I'm grateful for throughout those months, but also to identify things that were maybe missing. What I need more of, what I need less of. Evaluate your year according to what those photos are telling you and determine how you want this year to be different, right? So she shared that you can make a start, stop and continue list what do you want to start this year, what do you want to stop this year and what do you want to continue? Say it again what do you want to start, what do you want to stop and what do you want to continue? And this really set the pace for me to start this year intentionally, right.

Speaker 1:

So one of the things that I noticed from last year is there were not a lot of fresh cut flowers in my pictures, right? So I determined that I want to surround myself with more fresh cut flowers. That may mean nothing to you, but for me. It brings me so much joy to see them, to smell them, to experience them, to arrange them, so that's a decision that I made. I also noticed that there was a lot of work in my pictures, but not a lot of fun. Now, work is fun to me, the travel is fun, engaging with y'all is fun, speaking is fun, so I want to give credit to that. But also I'm talking friends, family fun. There was not enough of friends and family in my pictures for me and I want to change that for this year. And we started we started in December and continuing. I want to make sure that there's more friends and family engagements, interactions, connections in this year. So that's something that I want to start. So you continue. What do you want to start? What do you want to stop and what do you want to continue, based on how your year was last year? So these are just a few things that I did or am doing to reset my rhythm.

Speaker 1:

When we come back next week, I want to talk to you about some of the objections that you will have Some of the PBJ. This sounds good, but I can't because of this. I can't because of kids, I can't because of work. I can't because I don't have support. I can't because I don't have family close. I get it. I'm not saying that this is just easy peasy. Just do it today. What I am saying is it's worth it. Do it today, what I am saying is it's worth it. So, as always, friend, you are powerful, you are significant, you are brilliant and you are loved. You got to reset, friend. Your current rhythm is not sustainable and if you keep living this way, it's going to drive you straight to burnout. It's not a play game. It's not a game. Let's do it. All right, I'll talk to you next week. Bye, friends.

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