Disrupting Burnout
Disrupting Burnout with Dr. Patrice Buckner Jackson is dedicated to overworked, undervalued high-achieving servant leaders who give all to serve others and leave very little for yourself. You are an accomplished woman with many responsibilities and you often find yourself overwhelmed, exhausted, and burned out. I’ve been there. As a matter of fact, burnout almost cost me everything. Compassionate work can carry a high price tag: your mind, body, spirit and relationships may be in distress as you serve the needs of others. I am here to equip your hands and refresh your heart so you can serve in purpose and fulfillment and permanently break cycles of burnout.
Disrupting Burnout
140. Rest Is Not a Luxury: Your Mindset Matters
Your mindset about rest might be the very thing preventing you from avoiding burnout. Dr. Patrice Buckner Jackson (PBJ) tackles the limiting beliefs that keep us from taking much-needed breaks in this powerful episode of Disrupting Burnout. From productivity fears to identity concerns, perfectionism, and practical excuses – these mental barriers prevent us from establishing sustainable rhythms of work and rest.
Science consistently proves that our brains function optimally when given regular opportunities to reset. Yet many high-achievers believe taking breaks will damage their productivity or reputation. As PBJ powerfully states, "Rest is not a luxury. Rest is survival, rest is self-preservation." This countercultural message challenges the burnout-glorifying narrative that pervades many professional environments.
The episode tackles common excuses like "I have too much to do," "everyone depends on me," and "if I slow down, I might get passed over for promotion." PBJ shares personal insights from her own burnout journey, revealing how she eventually learned that her value wasn't tied to her hustle. She emphasizes that what seems like dedication is often a dangerous path to exhaustion – one that's unnecessarily expensive in terms of health and wellbeing.
For those struggling with how to implement effective breaks, PBJ introduces the STOP plan framework, a simple but critical approach to incorporating micro-breaks into daily life. This free resource provides practical strategies for creating purposeful pauses that help sustain energy and prevent burnout. If you've been pushing through exhaustion or can't remember the last time you truly rested, this episode offers both the permission and the practical tools you need to disrupt the burnout cycle. Download the free STOP plan resource mentioned in the episode and start reclaiming your rhythm today.
Upgrade to Premium Membership to access the Disrupting Burnout audiobook and other bonus content: https://www.buzzsprout.com/1213895/supporters/new
And we got to address this. Rest is a luxury, rest is survival, rest is self-preservation. It's not a luxury, it's not a reward, it's not what you get as a result of being completely exhausted. You need water, you need food, you need rest, and that's just the truth on that. Hey, friend, I am Dr Patrice Buckner-Jackson, but you can call me PBJ.
Speaker 1:Welcome to another episode of the Disrupting Burnout podcast, where we are giving you the strategies for pouring out purpose without continuing to live in the consequences of burnout. And friend, today, today, today, this episode is very important. All of them are important, but, friend, you need to hear this because I am convinced that the number one reason why you can't figure out how to take a break is because your mindset about taking a break is holding you back. Let me tell you what I mean by mindset, the way that we have been conditioned to think. I often talk about your invisible backpack, and in that invisible backpack is every experience you've had, everything that you've learned, formally or informally, whether you learned it by watching someone or whether they sat down and discussed it with you. Every time your heart was broken, every time you learned a new concept, every time you looked up to someone and you wanted to imitate them or you wanted to learn from their life. You looked up to someone and you wanted to imitate them or you wanted to learn from their life. Everything, every hurt, every trauma, everything is in your invisible backpack and those experiences make up the schema or the box that we use to define life around us, right? So our mental definitions of life come from our experiences. And friend.
Speaker 1:Often we have a limited mindset, a poverty mindset, a mindset of lack, and that's not just about time or taking breaks. It can be about money, it can be about relationships, it can be about your own, what you have to give to the world, it can be about yourself and your self-esteem. But when we have limiting beliefs, when we have a mindset of lack, you can have the strategies in your hand, you can know exactly what you need to do, but your mindset is holding you back from doing what you need to do. So in these episodes we've been talking about resetting your rhythm to a life rhythm that is sustainable, impactful, productive and powerful. But you will not reset your life rhythm until you address some of the lack mindset, some of the limiting beliefs that you carry concerning taking a break. Now listen to me, friend, this is not your fault. It's not your fault. You didn't ask to learn these lessons. You didn't ask to gain these concepts, these standards, these definitions. This was handed to you. It's not your fault, but it is your responsibility.
Speaker 1:So today I want to identify some of the mindsets you may want to call them excuses, some of the thought processes, some of the mindsets you may want to call them excuses. Some of the thought processes, some of the ideas, the standards that hold you back from taking the break that you need and keep in mind we're talking micro breaks, friend. I'm not even talking about a month's sabbatical. I'm talking about what some of y'all need, but that's another topic for another day. I'm talking about the daily micro breaks, the purposeful pauses that you need on a regular basis in order to sustain the way you live and the way you serve.
Speaker 1:So, pbj, I can't stop. I don't have time to stop. If I stop, all of this falls apart. We're short-staffed. I don't have anybody that can take my place at work. I don't have support at home or at work to stop.
Speaker 1:Friends, if any of these thoughts come to mind when you think about taking a break, you are the person who needs to stop the most. I want to offer you our stop plan. Simple. I want you to use the same strategies and wisdom and skills that you use at work, and I'm going to guide you to using those strategies to plan micro breaks. I'm not talking about a month's sabbatical, but can you incorporate micro breaks into your life as a regular rhythm of rest so that while you are serving, while you are giving, you can have moments of revival, so that you can live the life you're living sustainably? Friend, you need to grab this stop plan. Make sure to click the link in the show notes or wherever you're watching or listening to this, so that you can get what you need right now. It can't wait. I know you do a wonderful job, but people don't know what it costs you to be you, and you know what the cost is. Man. It's time to stop. Grab the plan today.
Speaker 1:So let's get into some of these limiting beliefs, and I have broken them into categories so that we can discuss the categories and the way that you need to change your mindset concerning these specific categories. So, first of all, let's talk about fear concerning your productivity, and I'm going to read some of these excuses to you and as you hear these, I want you to consider man, I say that or I've said that or I thought that, because if you recognize these phrases, it is a tell that you need a break, friend. Okay, so concerning our fears of lack of productivity, I have too much to do and not enough time to do it. I'll take a break after I finish this email, this phone call, this project this semester, this fiscal year. I'll take a break after. Whatever the thing is, if I take a break now, I'll just have twice as much work waiting for me when I return. I'm more productive when I work straight through. I can get more done when I just keep pushing.
Speaker 1:I don't have the luxury of rest that others have. I'm coming back to that one. You already know I can rest when I retire or in American culture, folks have said I can rest when I'm dead. Not over here, not in this community, and we're not even joking about that because we have lost people we have. We've lost women, powerful, effective educators, professional women. We have lost them because of overwhelming burnout. So we're not playing that game over here. I function well under pressure, so breaks are not necessary for me. I function well under pressure, so breaks are not necessary for me.
Speaker 1:All of the science that I could find that I have heard about how brains work tell us that we are more productive as human beings when we give our brain effective breaks. The break is not. I guess we've been conditioned to believe that the break is because we're lazy or we're weak, or if we were strong, we wouldn't need a break. Friend, you are human and you have a human brain, and your human brain cannot work optimally without an opportunity to revive itself, to rest, to release toxins, to reset the mood, the motivation, the creativity, the strategy, the wisdom all the things that you're craving, that you need that. You feel like you've lost. Friend, you haven't lost anything. I'm here to tell you your brain needs a break and it will increase your productivity. I told you last week when we were talking about task switching well, maybe a couple of weeks ago now, when we were talking about task switching that you are 40% less productive when you're hopping from one thing to another thing, to another thing, as opposed to focus in. Take a break, focus again, take a break. So the truth is you are more productive after taking a break. You're trying to push, push, push through that project and if you will just allow yourself to pause for a minute, you will find that you'll come back and not just be better but be faster. I learned this specifically when I was writing my book.
Speaker 1:Some folks write like they get up and write an hour a day and you know they get their progress that way. I'm not that kind of writer. I need a big chunk of time because once I'm in there, I just need to like, get it, like I need to get it out Right. So the hour a day thing just didn't work for me. I needed half days, I needed a day to really like. That's the thing I'm focused on, that's all I'm thinking about in order to get this done.
Speaker 1:And I found, with those big chunks of time, there were moments where I felt blocked, like I felt like gosh, this is not coming out the way that I want to say it, I can't get to it. Or there's a story that I need to tell here and I can't connect with the story. And I learned that if I just stop, because I would sit there and frustrate myself, try to push, push, push and it would not come, friend, it just didn't come. I learned when I stop, walk away, take the nap, go to bed, get outside, get some fresh air, spend time with family, whatever. When I came back, that thing was flowing like a river because I gave my brain a break.
Speaker 1:It's not that it's not there. Whatever you need, it's that you can't access it because your brain is exhausted. So if you have limiting beliefs that say, if you take a break you won't be productive, I'm here to tell you that that is not true and we got to address this rest as a luxury. Rest is survival, rest is self-preservation. It's not a luxury, it's not a reward, it's not what you get as a result of being completely exhausted. You need water, you need food, you need rest, and that's just the truth on that. All right. So those are limiting beliefs around productivity. I want to um, I want to read some limiting beliefs around your identity and who you are and how you show up in the world. Some of the excuses or beliefs you may have.
Speaker 1:Everyone depends on me. What would they do if I stepped away? Taking breaks is for people who aren't as committed as I am. I got to where I am by outworking everyone else. Nobody else on my team takes breaks, so I can't either. I'm the only one who knows how to do this properly, so I'm the only one that can do it.
Speaker 1:If I'm not constantly working, people will think I'm not dedicated. My work ethic is what makes me valuable, friend. Your value goes deeper and beyond your hustle. You're not valuable because you fail to say no. You're not valuable because you're willing to always raise your hand and go to the nth degree. You're not valuable because you're willing to always raise your hand and go to the nth degree. You're not valuable because you're willing to do all the things. You're valuable because you have an innate, unique brilliance that cannot be replaced, that you bring to the world that no other person does like you. And as long as you feel like the hustle is all you bring, you're going to be stuck in a cycle of hustle and burnout, friend.
Speaker 1:This first one that says what happens if I step away. Everybody depends on me. I've told you before when I stepped away from my job due to burnout. One of the reasons why I kept pushing myself was who's going to take care of my students? Where are they going to go? Who's going to have the open door to them? I'm here to tell you when I had to step away when I had no other choice. Those students continued, they graduated, they started careers, and it doesn't mean that I wasn't significant in their lives. It means I wasn't the only one and I learned that it wasn't as much as everybody needed me as it was my need to be needed. So if your identity is I'm everybody's person and my value is in that I'm willing to show up, do the thing, be there always. It's going to wear you out and you don't even know who you are, because there's more to you than that. Let's keep going, all right.
Speaker 1:So let's talk about some fear, and a lot of this is connected to fear. Let's be honest. But let's specifically name some fear excuses or why you don't give yourself a break. If I slow down, I might get passed over for the promotion. Someone else might take my place, my role, my position. If I'm not always available, I might miss a critical opportunity. If I disconnect, I'll be seen as weak. If I admit I need a break, I don't want to be labeled as not a team player. My boss will think I'm not serious about my career. Player my boss will think I'm not serious about my career. Taking breaks is a luxury. My colleagues will resent me, for this fear is connected to imposter syndrome. This fear is connected to toxic work environments where we have allowed people to work until they have nothing left and we have taught that this is the standard.
Speaker 1:And I want you to know that if you are fighting to contort yourself, to fit into an environment that doesn't align with who you are and what you need, it is not going to last. Friend, hear me, I got the promotions, I got the titles and the salaries, and when I tell you the way that I was working, those salaries and those titles were way too expensive. What it was costing me was my life and my livelihood. So you've got to make a decision about what you are unwilling to lose. Where do you draw your line? What are your boundaries when it comes to what you're willing to pay and what you're willing to give for a position? Friend, I'm not telling you not to continue on the career ladder. That's out of integrity. I continue in my career and I love it and I appreciate every promotion and every opportunity. But what I'm here to tell you is I wish I had known then that those were not my identity, that what I bring to the table is deeper and richer than any title that anybody could give me, and if I'm in an environment where it costs me my life, my livelihood, my mental health, my physical health in order to get the promotion, in order to be respected, in order to have a seat at the table, you can have that seat, friend, and I can only say that confidently.
Speaker 1:Now, after years of suffering and when I say suffering, y'all hear me I love my career. I really do. I really did. That's not what I'm saying. I was suffering through it, though More than one thing can be true. I loved it and I was living the consequences of it. So you've got to decide, and when I look back, a lot of that could have been changed by me without me leaving the position. I could have adjusted myself without asking anybody's permission, but I was telling myself I couldn't. I was telling myself if I did, there would be consequences to my career. I was telling myself that if I changed, people would disrespect me, that they would not honor me, that they would not give me a chance. Those were the mindsets that I was living under, but the truth of the matter is I could have done things a little bit differently and they would not have even known the difference.
Speaker 1:I have a good friend, dr Wendy Wilson. She's told me many a times. She said, pbj, your C work is most people's A plus. She says so you're trying to give people A+ that don't even have capacity to hold it. Listen, my friend don't play, okay, she don't play when it comes to me and the people that she loves or anybody else. She tells the truth. Your C work is most people's A+. So the overextending that you're doing, I wonder if you could be more productive and more clear and more impactful if you allowed yourself the same grace that you give everybody else. Let's keep going. Let's talk about perfection.
Speaker 1:Here are some excuses and mindsets that come from perfection. I need to be available 24-7 in case something goes wrong. I have to do everything perfectly, which requires constant attention. If I'm not involved, it won't be done right. I can't relax until everything is perfect and complete. I'll take a break when I've achieved whatever the goal is. I need to set an example for my team, for my students, for my children. This standard friend.
Speaker 1:Transitioning into entrepreneurship has taught me that the only way to move forward, to learn, to grow, is to embrace progress over perfection. I've learned in my business that if I wait till everything's perfect, I would never do, whatever the thing is. But if I allow myself to keep walking, keep moving with missteps, with imperfections. One I'm learning. Two, my community is learning along with me and they recognize that I'm human and we're in this together. Three I'm getting the best out of my business because I'm learning as I go. So I want to encourage you. I want to identify where that standard of perfection comes from and why you feel like you have to be perfect but everybody else has margin for error. Where does that come from that you think that everything that you do, that you produce, must be absolutely perfect? But if anybody else has a misstep, they're human and it's okay and they're learning. I want you to address that drive to be perfect and allow yourself to learn, to grow, to try, and you will be amazed that your outcome it still exceeds expectations, even when it's not your concept of perfect. Let's keep going.
Speaker 1:Last section these are some practical excuses or limiting beliefs that you might have. I don't know how to take an effective break. I've tried taking breaks before and they didn't help. I get more anxious when I try to rest because I think about all I should be doing. It takes too much energy to plan for a break. By the time I disconnect enough to actually rest, it's time to go back to work. I don't have the support system to allow me to take breaks.
Speaker 1:These limiting beliefs and excuses are the reason why I created the stop plan framework to share with you. This is exactly why I created that free resource because I understand. I understand it seems like the simplest thing when someone says just take a break. It seems like it should be so easy and there shouldn't be any questions about how to take a break. But I'm aware and I know that it's not easy, friend that we have been conditioned to be on all the time and we've never been given permission to actually stop. So your body, your brain, your nervous system has a muscle memory for how to be on, but you have no framework for how to stop. You believe that women who came before you didn't stop, that professionals who came before you didn't stop. So you've taken on a perception that success looks like always on, and I'm here to tell you that the standard for success must change. Today. We cannot, within the context in which we live and work, we cannot expect that standard from ourselves or from others.
Speaker 1:So I want you to grab the STOP plan. The link is in the show notes here. Make sure you walk through it and you use it, because when there is chaos, simplicity is a gift, and this plan is simple, but it's critical. It's critical for you to learn how to incorporate stops, micro breaks, into your life, not just leaning towards the next vacation or leaning towards the next long break. Friend, you need something more consistent than that. You got to have daily micro breaks, you got to have regular, purposeful pauses, and now it's the time for you to figure out how to do that.
Speaker 1:Okay, so get the free resource. Let me know you got it. Let me know you planned your next micro break. All right, friend, I hope that you got what you needed today and that you understand. It's not a lack of strategy. You know what you need to do, but your mindset is blocking your ability to get it done. I want you to say out loud whatever that excuse is, and then I want you to answer it with what the truth really is, because the truth makes us free. All right, as always, friend, you are powerful, you are significant, you are brilliant and you are loved. Love always, pbj, I'll see. You are loved. Love always. Pbj, I'll see you next week.
