Unarmored Talk

From Surviving to Thriving - What's Next After 50?

ā€¢ Mario P. Fields - Sergeant Major (Ret.) ā€¢ Episode 160

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šŸŽ™ļø What if the second half of life isnā€™t a slow fadeā€”but a bigger canvas?

Meet Barbara and Heather, a mother-daughter coaching duo redefining midlife. šŸŒ± Barbara returned to school in her 50s, earned two masterā€™s degrees, and rebuilt her coaching practice. šŸŽ“ Heather left the performing arts at 40, discovered leadership coaching, and found her calling to teach adults and teams. šŸŽ­

Together, they reveal how self-awareness, courage, and community can turn uncertainty into growth. šŸ’Ŗ We talk about fear, stalled plans, and how to rebuild belonging through curiosity, mentorship, and connection.

If youā€™re wondering whatā€™s next, this episode offers tools to blend experience with new directionā€”and reminds us that aging isnā€™t a limit, itā€™s leverage. šŸ”‘

šŸ“˜ Chapters
00:04:57 ā€“ Barbaraā€™s Late-Career Pivot 
00:07:55 ā€“ Heatherā€™s Journey From Arts To Coaching 
00:11:05 ā€“ Facing Fear & Finding Support 
00:12:22 ā€“ Rebuilding Belonging & Community 
00:14:41 ā€“ Authenticity, Storytelling & Mindful Growth 

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Mario P. Fields:

Welcome back to the Unarmor Talk Podcast. Again, if this is your first time listening on audio or watching on my YouTube channel, welcome. And for the longtime listeners and viewers, thank you for the past five years as we uh get ready to turn and go to year six. And I'm still your host, Mario P. Fields. And uh this special episode is a part of our collaborations. It's a special collaboration with an amazing organization called Bold Timers. And the framework, the series is called Turning Surviving Into Thriving. You guys can check if you didn't catch that first episode with Dr. Solomon, please check it out. And it's more mainly focused for folks that are 50 and above. However, these episodes can be applied to any human um on earth. And today I have an amazing, an amazing group of women, if you will. That's two, not a group, by the way, but that's Heather and Barbara, mom and daughter team. Welcome to the show.

Barbara Schindler:

Thank you. Good to see you, Mario.

Mario P. Fields:

Good to see you both. And and Heather, welcome back from your travels. Uh thank you.

Heather Conigal:

Yeah, just got back from Ireland. That's very nice.

Mario P. Fields:

Safe travels. Matter of fact, Ireland. I think the Pittsburgh Steelers just uh played over in Ireland.

Heather Conigal:

Yeah, they're trying to have the NFL over in Ireland and get get Ireland into American football, I guess.

Mario P. Fields:

They they did. Well, you you know, again, Barbara and and Heather are amazing uh bold timer coaches, and they do more than just that. So, Barbara, if we can lead off with you, if you tell listeners and viewers just a little bit about yourself.

Barbara Schindler:

Sure. Well, you know, as far as my work, I've been for more than a decade doing executive coaching with entrepreneurial leaders in businesses of many different sizes and many different ages. And truly, um, as my myself, as I'm aging in my career as well, and making decisions about different phases, uh, you know, what's next and how to prepare myself. And I think one of the most important pieces is listening, listening to my own life, right, and seeing where I'm at and and all different pieces of that. And so, you know, we've really been Heather and I both as a coaching team and separate in our coaching styles, you know, have been finding clients more and more in really positions that we're talking about. Yes, over 50, but even younger than 50, finding themselves in a transition, a moment of change on the outside that we need to respond to and getting to that self-awareness. So I'm working on more self-awareness about myself at this phase of my life.

Mario P. Fields:

Wow. And Barbara, 10 years, everyone, that that's not an easy uh milestone uh to spend helping people. And so, Barbara, I want to applaud you for just dedicating your life to helping other humans become a better version of themselves. And like you said, now now what about me? Barbara Sindler, right? What about me? That's so that is cool. And and Heather, uh, how about yourself?

Heather Conigal:

Well, you mentioned this theme, Mario, of from surviving to thriving. And this is something that Barbara and myself are extremely passionate about in what we coach and teach, because there are you you have a choice every day in how you go through this experience of being human. And we can either be surviving or thriving. And as coaches, what we do is we work very hard every day to help people be more empowered so that we can be setting them up to be thriving, right? And there's more and more challenges, it seems, these days. I mean, I feel like life has never been easy breezy. There's always been challenges, right? But it seems like there's a lot of challenges these days. It's a great time to get coaching support and have people in your corner. That's why we love this community we're a part of with bold timers that's offering support to people in later stages of transition, helping them have community, helping them to think through what they want to define for these for their life in these next phases, because we can either go through life where we're just kind of accepting what's happening and becoming resigned and stagnant, or empowered and therefore thinking for ourselves and getting creative and defining what do we want to create for ourselves in these phases that are still coming forward in our life, right? And we can have empowered aging. That's what I want for people, and that's why I'm passionate about what Barbara and I are doing with bold timers.

Mario P. Fields:

Yeah, I love it. And listening to you both, the question is let's jump right into the topic. And then, you know, the question of what's next? You know, you you're in your 40s, 50s, 60s, and above, and you've achieved some things, some things, and you're going, what what's next? And so Barbara, uh, we'll start with you. Can you talk to me a little bit about when you had a what's next moment? Yeah.

Barbara Schindler:

I'm gonna lean into the current times. Okay. I've had many at this point in my 60s. I've had many what's next, right? moments. And they're often led, you know, I get there by being like, oh, it's not going the way I thought. Or, oh no, where do I go from here? It seems to be not open, this path I thought I was on, right? Because you get something happens on the outside that kind of changes Barbara's plans, right? And you know, in that ultimately, you know, I've always had this idea of aging joyfully and joyfully not just like having a good time, but like I've always had this image. And whenever I've met particularly women, but I've certainly met men in their older ages. Again, I'm in my 60s and I'm talking about maybe when they're in their 90s, maybe their 80s, like, you know, really being able to be authentic and alive, thriving. And that, like more than anything in my life path has been like the vision for me, right? Like I have a family vision. I love being a mom and raising a family. I love my career and helping people. I when I was 50, I did go to um, you know, was okay. One of those moments was like, oh wait, I never did do the college thing I was gonna do, right? Kind of dabbled with it. So when I was 50, that's was what's next. I went and finished my bachelor's degree and and then did two master degrees, right? And that changed the course of my career where I could focus on another credential that could bring me forward into the work that I really desire to do at that phase and beyond.

Mario P. Fields:

You know, you you know, Barbara, you you know how you mentioned the external factors, all those things that are out of our human control. And hell, you inspire me. I'm three classes for my bachelor's and I'm 50. And listen, listeners and viewers, and I'm gonna go get it, but listeners and viewers, as you guys heard Barbara uh say, just because you're 50, you're I don't care if you're 12, you know, but we regardless, you know, you get to that what what's next moment, and just do it, just do it. And then Heather, uh, you know, how about you? And by the way, before I get to Heather, everyone, if you get on a YouTube channel, uh Barbara does not look like she's in her 60s. I told her this the first time I met her. And so she had she had a vision of aging gracefully on the outside, and uh she's achieved that. And so it it and Heather does not look her age. I won't say her age, but she does look. What's next, Heather? What was your what's next moment and how did you navigate it?

Heather Conigal:

Well, I had a time where I went back to school as well, and I transitioned my career uh when I turned 40. Um, and that was when I say I retired from pursuing my career in the performing arts, which took me from small town Vermont to New York City to LA. And it was a hard path. And it just it it was it was creative and fun and brought me some kind of opportunities, but it never really flew into a bunch of open doors and big expansive things happening, right? It was a hard path. And so I found myself going back to school myself and graduating when I was 40 and having this master's in spiritual psychology, and ending up then going and looking for a job to become a coach. And then I got connected through somebody somebody else and ending up with this career being a business coach and becoming a program director of a year-long leadership uh development training program. And what was strange about it was as a little kid, I always wanted to be a teacher, and I found myself being a teacher of adults and teaching them things like delegation and all of these other things that I never envisioned teaching, but there I was a teacher, and that little child vision came to fruition in this other way, and there I was teaching because I was entrusted with this leadership program, given it to lead and develop and continue, right? And then uh a year ago, when my former employer decided not to continue that program herself, that's when I launched my own business in partnership with Barbara. We have our business empowering leadership teams and kind of kept that going. But that's what happened for me at 40 when I transitioned out of the performing arts and found myself in this world of being a business coach, which is something I never planned on, but I met amazing people working inside of entrepreneurial businesses, people that gave their whole hearts working for these companies, believing in these missions of these companies, and just worked so hard. And yeah, and just there's no other way to say it, but like gave their whole hearts to what they were doing and believed so passionately and gave all of their creativity, all of their, you know, best thinking to these companies. And I loved supporting them to continue developing and doing what they were doing, and so that I grew to love being a business coach, which like is one of those things when you're a little kid, I don't know, you don't really dream of doing.

Mario P. Fields:

You're like two years old coaching Mario at the Kool-Aid stand, you know, right? Yeah, but my English is not that good. I'm two, but here here's some here's some tips.

Heather Conigal:

But maybe these days with people with little kids seeing that online and stuff, maybe that is a career they might uh want to pursue.

Mario P. Fields:

You know, the key the key denominator listening to you both is your attitudes. Um you know, very positive attitudes. You know, I'm sure that there were some fears, some doubt, some anxiety at your what what's next moments. And then the other thing, just listening to you both, is is surrounding yourself around, intentionally surrounding yourself around people who are passionate, who are positive, and who are going to enhance your what's next moment. Over to you know, to Barbara, how critical do you believe it is to have a network of friends, family, neighbors, whatever, to help you navigate your what's next moment in life?

Barbara Schindler:

Yes, it's it's highly important, um, definitely, and from my perspective. And finding uh that, I don't know, people you know, you say you know finding your peers in your work career, finding those neighbors. You know, four years ago I moved to uh Vermont and I had lived in Vermont before, not this particular area. So I didn't know anybody. And I probably spent about a year because I I do work as a coach virtually and I work from home, right? So it took about a year before I was like, Barbara, you gotta get outside and meet the neighbors more. Maybe I knew my immediate neighbors, right? Like, I gotta go find my people. And and we actually, you know, really that sense of belonging. I really, I honestly remember coming that first year and like I didn't know anybody and I just felt out of place. I'd go, you know, grocery store, different places around town, and I didn't feel that sensible longing. And I couldn't even fully identify the uncomfortableness until I started being like, okay, I've got to get out of the house and connect with people and you know, find people of like interest, of course, that's a good path to follow. And and you know, now I have that network of people, and it really makes a difference again for sense of belonging. And if there's any a day that like I'm like, you know, who am I and what am I doing? I can anchor it with someone close to me, you know, certainly family and friends, and but even community is really, really important.

Mario P. Fields:

You know, and then Heather, here you are going from performing arts, you know, in in your 40s from Vermont all over the world, if you will, uh, primarily the East Coast. How about yourself? You know, how critical, and you mentioned, you know, those entrepreneurs, very passionate. How critical do you believe that was for you?

Heather Conigal:

I think sense of community is so important. That's why it's important with um the bold timers community, where they're trying to create um community to support this idea that you have next phases to be alive in and keeping alive in, right? And in the leadership work that we do, we have communities for those entrepreneurial teams to meet with other entrepreneurial teams because you need community that have the same experience as you, that deal with the same challenges with customers and with uh CEOs and that know how to navigate that, right? You need people reflecting back to you. You're not alone in this. And that's where having coaching support can really help as well, right? To get that tailored like support that can reflect to you. As a coach and as a teacher too, I often tease people I work with and say, if I have a keynote, a keynote slide about it, like I have a graphic to show you, then it means you're not alone, right? Because I've created a graphic and a teaching around it because there's so many people I've met with that have dealt with the same exact issue. And I think that's very comforting for us as humans, right? We're all more alike than we are different, and we're all going through struggles that are very much similar and overlap. And community helps us remember that, and that is that is comforting and and gives us strength in challenging moments, I believe.

Mario P. Fields:

Yeah, I I love the energy, and and like you you both have mentioned in different ways, it's not over, it's not because you just because you're getting older. Oh, it's over. Oh, I'm I'm 50. Oh, I'm 60. It's it's over.

Heather Conigal:

No, I mean you can really believe that or not at any moment in time in your life, yeah, right.

Mario P. Fields:

Really? And I love, and I love how you you both have have you know presented that. No, no, it's not over. Matter of fact, let's uh thrive, let's uh you know, let's turn it up, let's let's turn it up, whatever that may mean. Last last thing I want to discuss is and and again, uh Barbara first. Um if you had to give yourself advice 10 years ago, all right. You're in your 60s, so let's go 50s. If you had to if if you were standing next to yourself 10 years ago, what would you tell yourself?

Barbara Schindler:

Yeah, yeah, interesting. Okay, so 10 years ago. Okay, so kind of thinking about okay. So I was gonna say, you know, 10 years ago, I think 50, 60, because I'm 68, but like I don't think 68, I just think 60 is.

Mario P. Fields:

Oh my god, it just gets worse. I mean, not worse in a bad way. You're oh my gosh. Everyone again, if you're on the show listening, please go on a YouTube channel. That's uh you can put Mario P. Field Sergeant Major in front of that YouTube, and it will pop up. Or you can look in the remarks on this show and click on the link to watch this video. Over to you, Barbara, who says she's 68, but I think she's lying.

Barbara Schindler:

Thank you. So so where my mind went was oh, well, when I was 50, I told you I said, like, what's next? And kind of leaned into, well, what haven't I done that I passionately wanted to do? And that was, you know, actually finishing my college. I had dabbled in college for at an associate's degree. So finishing my bachelor's in human behavior, knowing I wanted to study psychology, knowing I I had, you know, all these years I had been following a path of more alternative, you know, following a Reiki healing and other other ways of, you know, the house how humans operate basically is fascinating to me. Anyway, but so my mind went there and I said, well, that wasn't really 10 years because I'm 68 now. So that's like, you know, what happened at 58. But so that's where my math went. But it's a phase of life, right? That was a time that really started a phase of my life that has gone full circle into what's next. In you know, in this place, I find myself having put pieces together, my home here in Vermont, my community network of people, the different things I'm doing here, as well as my work with others, helping people know themselves. You know, the Bold Timers has the same, you know, theme that I another has expressed. I really want people to know themselves to be able to thrive and be self-expressive, right? So I think if I go back then in that way, what really pops into my mind when I'm listening me talk here is that I would tell myself to be even more self-aware in the process so that I'm driving along with what life is offering. I consider that co-creation. Right. So have opportunities, but keep being more and more in touch with how I'm growing, how I'm, you know, who am I and how is this uh responding, you know, in in my my inner world? You know, who am I in this now? Because I think these last 10 years, I would have uh made some different decisions. You know, I who knows how it would have went. But that self-awareness, so that co-creation piece, here's what's happening, here's the opportunities, and who am I in this? What's the opportunity? What's my heart telling me? Uh, even stronger. Um, and that is what I'm working at being more mindful of at this phase.

Mario P. Fields:

Yeah, mindfulness and self-awareness. I love how you talked about co-creation. Yeah, opportunities are gonna come. You know, life is is very complex, but not forgetting the core, and that is who am I? And having that self-awareness. And then and then Heather, again, everyone get on get on a YouTube channel. Heather looks like he's like 28. It runs in the family. Um, Heather, over to you. How about you?

Heather Conigal:

Uh well, so 10 years ago, is that what the question was?

Mario P. Fields:

Yeah.

Heather Conigal:

Um, well, I think I'm in a big moment of transition actually right right now. And I'm on the verge of turning 49 in October 19th, so a few weeks away. And um, and it feels like a big transition time for me. And as I was reflecting and listening to Barbara, I was thinking this is kind of a time where I'm thinking of blending all of the paths of my life up until now. So kind of bringing back forward some of the creativity pieces from the performing arts and things that um I tapped into earlier in my life and maybe set aside for the past decade while I was focused on what does it mean to be a business coach and let me succeed over here doing this thing, right? And to tap back into that. So I've been doing this journey. I'm a president of a chapter of Toastmasters here where I live. And so I've been tapping into that, but that's been bringing forward more of this storytelling aspect. Um, and I think that's part of you know, my ancestry coming from Ireland and things like that, as like that storytelling aspect. So I think it's like kind of as the whole person, how do I digest all of these aspects of my life that have brought me to now? And I like what Barbara was saying about authenticity, because I am most attracted to friends and people in my life who I think are most fully authentically expressed, right? And I find that most attractive in other people because I want to be that version of myself as well in life. And I think that's one of the gifts of aging as well, is that we get to a place where we we hopefully have a peace with just being ourselves in the world and not having to apologize for who we are, but like celebrating who we are and expressing who we are more freely in the world. And that's definitely something I want to do as I step into. Not gonna be 50 yet, but I'm getting closer to that decade, and I think that's what being 50 is all about for me.

Mario P. Fields:

That's cool. The mutual fund, I like the like the mutual fund. You know, I'm taking Heather's like, all right, I got a lot of wisdom here, lots of experience. Happy early birthday, by the way. But that now I want to take this mutual fun of things, and and I'm going to take it to where I'm authentic and be who you are. Be like you said, be comfortable with who you are, be proud of who you are. I mean, I'm five foot three with a deep voice, and I'm super proud of that. It's a very odd combination. But but ladies, it's it's been awesome to have you on the show. Before I let you all go and enjoy Vermont, if you will. Um, how can people find you?

Heather Conigal:

Oh, yeah, thanks for asking. Our website is empowering leadership teams.com. And on your on our website there, you can sign up for a discovery call, which is uh a great way to just hop on Zoom and meet with Barbara and I and see how we could help you. And you can also find us right on LinkedIn. Um, and that's a good way to connect as well. So either way, um, and yeah, I think that's good. Did I miss anything, Barbara?

Barbara Schindler:

No, but I do love the invitation. If you go to our website, you can just click on. We have some calendar time for each of us separately in our calendars that is just set aside to have these kind of conversations together. That's the invitation. Let's have a Mario Fields conversation today, together. So please reach out and let's let's chat.

Mario P. Fields:

I like that, Barbara. I might have to change the whole hey, instead of the slogan, instead of discussions without armor, let's uh unarmor talk. Let's have a Mario P. Fields conversation. But you you guys have been amazing, and you know, lots of um key points here for the audience. And uh one thing I would like to leave everyone with is they said community. Bow timers is a community of thriving uh professionals of all backgrounds, and that's the key thing that connects us is we're thriving. It's not over, we're just beginning. And it doesn't matter what what age you are, every day is uh the first day. Got it, and until it's over. But until then, you guys have been great. Thank you so much, and everyone. Um, another episode will be coming out here shortly. Uh either either a regular podcast production or a special Bow Timers Unarmor of Talk collaboration. But until then, I will continue to intentionally pray for the listeners and the viewers, uh, your friends, families, and you guys know what to do. If you have pets, all living beings around you take care of the case.

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Mario P. Fields

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