Black Girls Consult TOO!
The Black Girls Consult Too! podcast provides a business resource for women in consulting, especially women of color, to successfully navigate a hyper-masculine, highly competitive industry. It demystifies how to start and grow a thriving consulting business by simplifying the process and helping to avoid common pitfalls that can derail even the best ideas. Each episode is crafted to dive deep into consulting practice, business strategy, mindset, and more. For more information, visit www.excelatconsulting.com/podcast.
Black Girls Consult TOO!
Episode 132: Bridging the Trust Gap: Overcoming Bias and Stereotypes
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Ever felt like you had to work twice as hard just to be seen as competent?
If you’re a woman, particularly a woman of color in consulting, chances are you’ve encountered the trust gap. This gap represents the distance between your genuine expertise and how others view it. When this gap exists, it's not merely frustrating; it’s deeply rooted in systemic bias.
In this episode, we’ll delve into how bias distorts perceptions of trust and competence and, more importantly, how to bridge that gap without losing ourselves in the process.
While you can’t control others’ biases, you can manage how you navigate and challenge them and reshape the narrative. Press play and discover how to transform the trust gap into a bridge to lasting credibility and respect.
***Subscribe and share this episode to inspire others to join this supportive and transformative conversation.***
For more information, visit https://excelatconsulting.com/
Hello, welcome to the Black Girls Consult Tube podcast. I'm your host, dr Angelina Davis, and today we're going to be talking about the trust gap and if you're wondering what this is, we've been in a series of episodes focused on how you build trust as a consultant, and the trust gap is important because this is that moment when you walk into a room as the expert but before you even can say a word, you can feel a lot of doubt in the air. You can literally cut through it and oftentimes the unspoken question is does she really know what she's talking about? Is she really supposed to be here? You know, I'll never forget when I first felt that shift in energy. It is real and it happened.
Speaker 1:Early in my career. I took over a consulting engagement after my mentor, who was an older cisgender white male, landed the contracts and the client was completely comfortable with him. They could see eye to eye. As a matter of fact, they would go golfing a lot together. I always talk about how, traditionally, a lot of business was won on the golf course. That is real and it did happen. And there was an instance where I could feel that the connection between me and him, the client, was not there. There was this unspoken sense of distrust that was there and that was very much unlike the equality that was sensed between my mentor and the client, because they had been colleagues, they had been friends, they had interacted with each other on a more intimate level. But the moment I stepped in as a lead, the tone completely changed. It was no longer excitement about the project and where we were going. As a Black woman now at the helm of everything, I could feel the discomfort of me being there and my expertise from the start was being questioned. How was it being questioned? It wasn't direct.
Speaker 1:Of course, there were a lot of subtle things that happened, but my strategies were often met with a lot of skepticisms, a lot of well, I don't know if we can do it that way, or I'm not exactly sure what you're trying to explain. I don't know if I understand what you're talking about, and at first I thought it was me. I thought that I was not speaking correctly, that I was not saying things clearly enough, I had not mapped out a plan that was going to work in their instance and I just took all the blame and ownership for that. But over time I realized that this was no longer just a problem I had. It was as if I had to prove myself in ways that I won't say that I had not had to do before, but I had not had to do in a long time in that role. But it was where I was at at the time and I had to learn how to navigate through it.
Speaker 1:So, for me, I focused on a lot of different little strategies that helped me rebuild a connection or actually build one, I would say, from the start and to move the project forward. But I had to close what was a trust gap, because in that moment there was a gap between me and that client and the work that we were doing together. And if I was unable to close that trust gap, I'll be honest, I don't think that the engagement would have lasted. And, as a matter of fact, there's another story that we'll talk about one day about how all these things panned out in the long run. But for the work that needed to be done, I had to make it work. As a consultant, I needed to know how to navigate these difficult situations. Even if I didn't like it, even if I didn't feel like it was my fault, I needed to show up in that space, own it, change it and move us forward so that all centered around closing this gap that existed. It's the literal space between where I was and where others perceived me to be, to be. So it was the gap between reality and perception, and so closing that gap was something that was necessary, but also I will be honest with you it wasn't always easy, especially when you have systemic bias involved. So, the truth is, this is not unique to me, and that's why I want to have this episode in this conversation, because, as women, especially women of color and other marginalized communities, we need to close this gap and we need to know how to do it effectively and feel as if we are able to stand in our complete confidence when we're working with clients. Before we dive in deeper, I do want to ask you that, if you've enjoyed any of the episodes on this podcast, or if you are enjoying this episode as you tune in, make sure you leave a five-star review on Apple Podcasts or your rating on Spotify. It helps us to reach more people and to get this information out there. I greatly appreciate it. Now let's get started.
Speaker 1:So, according to research on systemic bias and trust dynamics, trust isn't just built on your skills or your experience? We want to think that it is, but there are a lot of factors that weigh into whether or not someone trusts you and is heavily influenced by cultural narratives and unconscious biases. Bias is often invisible to the person that holds them. It is a subjective belief, a way of thinking, and this way of thinking is typically shaped by societal norms or stereotypes and the various power dynamics that may be at play. So, when they directly impact us, it has the ability to keep us from being seen as trustworthy, as competent or as leadership material, although we are, because, remember, this bias that exists, influences the reality. So the reality is you're trustworthy, you're competent and you're more than capable of being a leader. However, this invisible framing or context that has been driven by stereotypes and societal norms, those things cloud the picture and, in consulting, this creates a huge hurdle for us as women, especially women of color. While others might get the benefit of the doubt, we're often forced to prove ourselves again and again and again, just to be seen as competent, not to even be seen as exceptional, just competent.
Speaker 1:So here's a perspective shift that I want to offer today. You can't control other people's bias. You can't control that, but you can control how you navigate it, challenge it and then flip the narrative, and that's what I want us to focus on. I'm not focused on changing what other people believe. What I'm focused on is how we take those misguided, is how we take those misguided skewed beliefs, the bias that exists, and navigate it effectively to serve our purpose. And that includes challenging it and flipping the narrative so that we can win the business that we need and we can build the businesses that we want.
Speaker 1:So we're gonna unpack a lot of stuff. We're gonna talk about how systemic bias skews perceptions of trust and competence and some practical strategies that will help you challenge this bias while staying true to yourself, and then also the role that data and results and relationships can actually play to help us bridge the trust gap. You know, really, if we're able to do this, I think that you will feel the weight of needing to overperform just to be seen. I think you'll feel that melt away a little bit, and that is my hope for this conversation. I want it to make you feel more empowered and ready to take on the big business that's coming your way, because the bigger and bigger you play, you're going to run into scenarios just like this. They may have a different slant depending upon the scenario, who's involved, but if you are a woman, if you are a person of color, if you're someone that's part of the LGBTQIA plus community, if you are someone who has been marginalized nine times out of 10, you're going to experience the trust gap, and this is how you navigate it.
Speaker 1:So one of the first things that I want us to tackle is understanding what the trust gap is and why it exists. It's not just about one bad client, and I think that many times we believe that one bad client experience is just a fluke, that this is just an example of a single awkward moment or meeting that we had and honestly, I wish that was the case, but it typically is not. It is systemic and actually research shows that trust is built on three core drivers. We talked about this in a previous episode, but if you look at the core drivers, they're authenticity, logic and empathy. Authenticity just pretty much says I believe you are who you are, who you say you are. Logic is I believe you can do what you say that you do, and then empathy is all about I believe you care about me and my success. So that is what typically builds trust, and we talked a little bit about this.
Speaker 1:But here's the issue Bias is what distorts those drivers. So, instead of authenticity, as I believe you are who you say you are when you walk into the room, there is this unconscious bias that exists and subconsciously it shifts authenticity to be does she really belong here? It's going to skew logic to have the person think is she really as skilled as she claims? Did she go to a good school? Can she really do the work? And then, in terms of empathy, instead of it being about believing that you care about them and their success is more so. You know, I don't. I don't know if you understand where I'm coming from. I don't know if you can understand my needs. I'm different than you.
Speaker 1:And this is what creates that trust wobble, that instability that exists in the setting, that causes people to question credibility. And for women, especially in women of color, the trust wobble starts before we even speak. So it's often there and we talked about how we can influence that trust wobble and in our previous episode, we talked about how we can do things that break down the authenticity piece or the logic or the empathy, if we're not being genuine, how we can cause this imbalance that exists, that makes somebody question us in terms of whether or not they can trust us. But then also there are instances and cases where we don't do anything to break down that trust, and the systemic bias actually does it. It primes people to see us as the quote-unquote other, meaning that it makes it harder for them to perceive us as being authentic or helpful or like them. It leads people to doubt our competence. That forces us to over-explain and to feel like we always have to prove our worth, and it causes clients and colleagues to question our ability to even be able to relate to them.
Speaker 1:And what I've always thought was the craziest part of all of this is that, as the marginalized person in the situation, as the person that's underrepresented in the situation, we're actually the ones that typically you would think would have these questions, but instead we're seen as the other, or the outsider, or the one that can't be trusted, or the one that is different. So it's all just a very interesting dynamic when you really think about it. But the empowering part is that when you can realize that this wobble that's occurring, this breakdown in trust that has happened, when you can recognize that number one is happening but then, two, it is not happening because of you, then you can strategically strengthen that weak point. You can actually start to do things that help to bridge the trust gap, because then you're no longer focused on what you're doing or saying or bringing to the table because, like I stated before, in this instance this is not caused by you. This is being driven by distortions, by the bias that exists, by the subjective feelings and thoughts that exist around you, based on stereotypes and other mistruths. So when you can recognize that, then that gives you the power to change it.
Speaker 1:So when we talk about navigating this bias, sometimes it can feel exhausting. I know that. I've talked to clients before and I've even said this myself. It can feel overwhelming to constantly have to prove yourself or to fight back when you feel like you're doing all that you can do to do things the right way, but you're consistently being misread or underestimated and the instinct for many of us is to just stop trying to do things differently into code switch, which I always like to say is just a form of diluting yourself down, softening your voice, fitting in, shaping yourself to be like the others in the room so that you fit in, so that you can be accepted, so that you push against these thoughts right, these thoughts of whether or not you belong here, whether or not you're like us. We begin to mold ourselves to be like the others who are discrediting our expertise before we even speak. But the hard truth is that every time we shrink down to fit someone else's inaccurate lens of who we are and this is hard for me to to say, it took me a while to even understand and own up to this, but it is true whenever we do this, whenever we shrink down to fit someone else's view of us, we reinforce the bias, right? We reinforce it because what we're saying is I am changing to fit the view and perception that you have of what I should be instead of who I am, and therefore you're giving validity to their beliefs. And I know this is how we've been trained to function, in corporate especially.
Speaker 1:I always like to talk about corporate trauma and corporate conditioning. So much of what we have learned over the years working in corporate environments is part of what keeps us stuck when we move into this lane of entrepreneurship, because then we begin to do all of the things to conform when in entrepreneurship and building your business, you're doing the things, or should be doing the things, to conform, when in entrepreneurship and building your business, you're doing the things, or should be doing the things, to stand out. So we work against our goals when we begin to give our power back to the people who see us as outsiders. So how do you fully show up as yourself while navigating these dynamics? I know you're probably thinking I hear you, dr Angela. Angela, I hear what you're saying, but I need to get this business. I don't know how else to navigate these rooms. This worked for me in my corporate career and so I think that it will work for me now.
Speaker 1:But what I will push you to consider is that, instead of reinforcing that viewpoint that they have, try staying objective. Let's let the facts do the work. You know, one of the most powerful strategies I teach is how to remain objective in biased spaces, because bias is subjective. So you're dealing with feelings, you're dealing with perceptions and unconscious narratives. So the more you can ground your strategy, your recommendations, your insights, in data, in research and results, the harder it is for someone to completely dismiss you based on these biased assumptions.
Speaker 1:You know, in my earlier career story. I didn't fight the client's bias head on. I wasn't trying to get them to see me differently, but what I was going to do is let that data do the work for me. I was going to point out everything that was going wrong in their organization, in the current strategies and the processes and the workflows that they currently had, and I was going to focus on outcomes, reference research and just really build a case that, in all honesty, if they wanted to get to their outcome which they did they'd already paid the money, had the contract needed to move forward, money, had the contract needed to move forward. Then what I was saying became undeniable. So when you use data and research in meetings, you can also activate this peer pressure effect. So this is actually an added bonus in addition to just letting the data work for you.
Speaker 1:The thing is that other people that are in that room with them that may be working on that project with you, or maybe they're someone that's working under that individual or working above the individual, whoever it may be at the table. Those people may not necessarily hold the same bias. They may have a different view. Their subjective view may not be as negative or negative at all. Maybe they think funnily of your expertise and your presence and the thing about you being able to remain objective at those times and focusing on the data, the research and the results, is that those who can see what's happening, the other people in the room that can understand the logic and what you're saying and what you're doing, they are going to make it harder for that biased individual to keep pushing back without losing some of the credibility themselves that they have, because after a while, this is going to sound, it's going to sound crazy for someone to be arguing against facts and data. Right, so that peer pressure effect is real and that just giving you a pro tip. Use it to your advantage, because when you get other people on your team and supporting what you're saying, you're just adding fuel to your fire.
Speaker 1:So, first things first, to navigate all of this, remain objective. Let's let the facts do the work. Now. The second thing is that I don't want you to run from calling out bias and other stereotypes and mistruths that may exist, but the one thing we do want to do, because of the nature of the business that we're doing, is that we wanna call it out without calling someone out. I hope you caught that you want to call the bias out without calling the person out. Now listen, if it's the weekend and you're in the streets and whatnot, hey, you can call the bias out, the person out and whoever else out. But in this setting, I'll be honest that you know, I'm one that feels as if you can call the bias out without calling someone out and still it be a powerful approach. And there are a number of ways that you can do this.
Speaker 1:If you sense that resistance that you're getting, the pushback that you're getting, is rooted in a sense of bias or a perception that somehow you are not good enough to do the work, or just whatever beliefs that the person may have, it is OK to address it indirectly, without turning the room into a battlefield. And what this looks like is literally just saying you know, hey, I know this approach may seem unconventional and I see that you have discomfort with this approach. However, here's why it's working in similar organization and here's what the data shows. So you're letting the person know that I recognize that you have resistance to what I'm saying and although you have this resistance, I'm telling you that it has worked before and it's going to work again. Skepticism right, because oftentimes people push back not just because they disagree with what's being said, but they also disagree with who said it. So you're able to push back without creating more conflict. And this is very beneficial, especially if you're in a larger meeting with a group of individuals where you have to be very careful how you navigate the conversation right and keep it on a positive note, moving forward, so that it does not go off the rails and it shifts the focus back, in all honesty, back to the objective facts, back to logic, back to results. You're acknowledging that the skepticism exists. You're recentering your authority in the conversation, so you're taking it back to. I recognize you have a problem, but I am telling you the solution and I'm going to tell you how it's worked for other people. So that is really powerful. Call it out without calling someone out.
Speaker 1:And then what I would say is the next big thing is to reclaim your control over code switching. I want us to reclaim control over it because I myself have been guilty of it. I think anyone has been in the corporate environment and been a part of a marginalized group, especially if you're a black female in the work environment. You have code switched before but, unlike your work, your nine to five, where you had to answer to somebody else in your business. You don't need to be code switching any longer Now. It's your choice whether or not you do so, but the pressure to code switch really does increase when we're around people who view us as somehow being inaccurate or what we're doing is being insufficient, and we can either support their misguided beliefs, as I said before, or we can reclaim our control, and what I want you to feel empowered to do is to reclaim your control and define who you are on your own terms. I'm not saying that this is always easy, but I do honestly feel like it's necessary, and one of the ways that I have found to do this is to just make sure that I clarify for everyone that's listening exactly what I said, what I meant and why I said what I said. So not only am I providing the information, but I'm providing context for it, and by providing that context for it and speaking clearly and standing in what you have already stated, meaning owning it, that exerts a level of power in the conversation that really does prevent others from challenging you in the future. I think you will be shocked if you were to embrace that fully, because it is time for you to change the narrative, and not code switching is going to help you actually do that.
Speaker 1:Now the last piece to this that we talked about, you know we first need to recognize that there is a trust gap that exists. Then we need to figure out how to navigate these dynamics by staying objective and calling out bias when we see it and reclaiming our control over co-switching. Then we need to focus on turning the trust gap into a bridge or bridging it over, and really that's all about flipping the script. In order for us to bridge this gap, we need to strengthen our authority and our reputation, because when we're able to strengthen our authority and our reputation, that is going to supersede any interaction that we have with people moving forward. So that's a way to begin to combat some of these misguided beliefs before we even get into conversation and meet those who are going to work with. So how do we do this Now?
Speaker 1:The first thing is and going back to data, because data is just like a big player when it comes to navigating and overcoming bias is that you want to use data as your superpower. The reality is although now, in today's society, I feel like we deal with alternative facts and whatnot. We know that that's not really a thing, but we have to deal with it. But facts are hard to argue with the more you can tie your recommendations and your insights and your strategies to facts and clear outcomes, when you can tie it to specifically I had when I was early in my career as a consultant when you can focus on the numbers, the things that actually show you what is happening, the facts, the results, the outcomes the more you sidestep the subjective bias, because the facts are what's going to drive others in terms of their actions. So don't wait to be asked for proof. I want you to collect this data for yourself. I want you to be up front in every proposal, meeting, presentation. I want you to reiterate it over and over again Whatever changes that you have made, results you have driven, don't just say it one time, don't just put it in one report, don't just throw it up on one slide. This needs to be communicated over and over and over again, because those that you work with when you're working in a situation where you are facing this level of bias or scrutiny, it is going to be those facts that help you to push further and that will form your reputation, which we want to be positive.
Speaker 1:Now the second thing is that when you're able to build stronger relationships and this gets back to the authenticity and empathy piece the bias, remember, thrives in distance. When someone doesn't feel like they're close to you, when they feel like you're an outsider, it's easier for them to hold these misguided beliefs. But when they know you, when they are in greater proximity to you, it gets a lot harder. Now I'm not saying that it completely goes away For some individuals it won't. But the more that you can get personal and find common ground with clients, the better.
Speaker 1:And what I always like to tell the clients I work with is that if you're walking into a room and this is going to happen a lot as a woman and consultant, especially when you get into working with higher C-suite you know individuals and corporate spaces and whatnot, just keeping in mind that women only make up less than 25% of those individuals. And then you get to black women I think we're less than 5% or 4% You're not going to necessarily walk into a room where there's a lot of commonality. So you want to begin to look for common ground with those clients and this goes back to that preparation and thinking about how you're going to approach your meeting. Finding those elements that are in common is going to help you talk and have a conversation that humanizes the approach, sharing stories, whether they're personal or professional that all helps you build trust through connection and not just competence. And the closer people feel to you, the harder it is for those biases to stick. It's hard, they have to let some of them go, unless they're just I don't know heck bent or hell bent on keeping them. It's going to be hard to not let those things go. So the more you can build those connections, the better.
Speaker 1:And then once their reputation is established, like those results that we were talking about you're getting, once you're building your reputation on facts, on results, on outcomes, on positive interactions and relationships, your reputation will be one of the most effective long-term strategies that you can have. Because if clients and colleagues hear about you in a good way before they meet you and what they hear is positive and results-driven and rooted in credibility and from a good person, that begins to pre-frame their perception of you, it's going to change the way that they view you and that works to your advantage. So you got to get visible, whether it is speaking on panels or sharing your insights on LinkedIn or writing thought leadership pieces. You need to get active, sharing what you know, getting visible, building this extra layer of trust, because those are the things that are going to help you break down this wall and bridge this trust gap.
Speaker 1:So, listen, navigating bias and bridging the trust gap is not easy. It's not easy. I hate that. It's something that we have to do, but it's absolutely possible. But it's absolutely possible and you have the power to take this bias that you represent is present and that's impacting the perception of your work, and strategically strengthen the trust drivers that you know creates a better relationship. And then you end up flipping a narrative and defining the entire engagement you have with that client on your terms. It is amazing how well this can work for you and into your advantage. And, like I said, as you start working with bigger clients, bigger contracts, bigger corporations and enterprises because I'm naming it and claiming it now as you do that you're going to run into this from time to time it's a reality of our society, at least for right now. So I want to challenge you this week to start thinking about how you can use data and storytelling and relationship building in your business.
Speaker 1:Now, to bridge some of these trust gaps that you may feel Whenever you walk into that room with someone that you feel may question why you're there or may have some skepticism as to whether or not you can do the work. I want you to be confident enough to stand in that space and rely on facts, rely on your history of work that you've done and even if you're just starting out, you have history because nine times out of 10, you are working consulting in a space where you have worked for a number of years, even decades. You have results. You have something to stand on. Speak to that. Claim it, speak bold. Something to stand on. Speak to that. Claim it, speak boldly, be objective, stick with facts and find those areas of connection. All of these things are going to work in your favor. I promise it will.
Speaker 1:So if this episode resonated with you and you enjoyed it, then share with a friend, let someone know about it and how it's been helpful to you. But then also, I want to know how you feel about bias in your space and how you get over the skepticism and how you navigate these trust gaps that may exist. Let me know, send me a DM on Instagram or LinkedIn at Dr Angelina Davis, and I want to just hear from you about how you were starting to bridge this trust gap. Is this something that you're facing often? Have you tried some of these things? Have they worked? Have they not worked? I'd love to know. So definitely reach out to me, and I hope that this will help you feel more prepared and empowered to take on any client that comes your way. I don't want you to question the work that you're doing or your ability to show up at the highest levels as the consultant you meant to be. All right, so until next time, keep building trust and always claim your authority. All right, guys, talk to you soon. Bye.
