Car Chronicles EP 20: What If Marriage Decisions Are Data-Driven Too

Miami tried to take us out with the kind of driving that makes defensive driving feel like a daily sport, but the real story starts when we get to the Hybrid Health Summit. We walk through the future of personalized health and performance, from genetics testing and epigenetics to what it means when your DNA shows predispositions for obesity, type 2 diabetes, or appetite issues tied to leptin signaling. The big takeaway is simple but powerful: genetics can load the gun, yet lifestyle pulls the trigger, and knowing your weak points helps you build a plan that actually fits your body.

We also get practical about the tools people argue about online. Peptides are naturally occurring, GLP-1 pathways matter, and drugs like semaglutide are designed to amplify effects your body already uses. But we keep it honest: you don’t automatically need peptides, a genetics test, or any “cutting-edge” add-on to make progress. What you do need is a clear protocol, solid basics, and better information when the basics stop working. That’s why we dig into blood work, why many standard panels are too limited, and how thyroid markers like TSH, T4, and T3 can tell very different stories when conversion is the real issue.

Then the episode takes a sharp turn into relationships, commitment, and marriage. We talk directly about dating standards, why “waiting for the ring” can keep you stuck, and how trust, pride, and willingness to change shape what happens next. If this hits a nerve, sit with it and ask whether the message helps you build the life and relationship you actually want.

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Transcript

Back On The Road

SPEAKER_02 0:04

Yes, sir. You know what that I mean? Back on the road again. And it's Thursday. So we are off to the church. And I know I haven't worked at church. I missed like, well, they had their spring break, so I wasn't there last Thursday. Then I was at Miami the Thursday after that. And now I'm I'm driving there and I'm like, because I always put into the GPS just in case there's any traffic or anything, so I can let the dispatcher know ahead of time. And it's like I I know how to get there, but the GPS is taking me a completely different way. And I was like, am I tripping or is this a different way? But I don't know if there's traffic on the other route or whatnot. So I was like, we can go sweat. That's all I like about San Antonio. It's just one big circle. So you can go either way and you end up the right way. But yeah, I was like, oh, am I tripping right now? I know over the last few weeks, your boy's been sleep deprived. I feel like I was going through special training, special forces training with sleep deprivation training. Freaking out of control, man. But yeah. So let's talk about Miami. Because let me get the criticisms of the city out of the way. And if you follow me on Instagram, then you already know. I hate Miami. I do not like that city. The people there, the driving is. I never thought I would get to use my defensive driving and the civilian side. I thought all hope was lost, but in Miami, I get to use it. I got to use it. And just crazy. They do this thing that I coined this term, called the Miami merge. And I ain't never seen nothing like it in any other city or country that I've driven in. Only in Miami. No blinker with no type of tail. They literally just merge. And there were so many wrecks in Miami. I've never seen so many wrecks. We've lived in San Antonio for three years, and I've seen maybe four wrecks. Bro, Miami alone, in the two days that we were there, we weren't even there for a full two days. We were there for a day and a half. We saw six wrecks. All of these wrecks had one thing in common damage to the side of their car. Because everybody was just merging at such a fast rate, at a high speed, no blinker, no nothing. And they were just t-bowing each other. It's crazy. I was like, man, I gotta get that freak up out of Miami. So yeah, city aside, the Hybrid Health Summit is what we're here to talk about. And this is our second year attending. And it's very eye-opening. Like I said, with the producing on the wedding, to see behind the scenes of what the future of health looks like. And it's absolutely insane with these technologies that they're coming out with. And the most fascinating one is the genetics test. He created a genetics test that literally, well, I mean it's self-explanatory, it goes over your whole genetic code and it tells you what's wrong with you. So we all know how obesity gets passed down through epigenetics. So if your father has it and your mother has it, there is a high likelihood that you're gonna have the genetic coding for obesity. Not obesity itself, the genetic coding. And then what happens is these kids live terrible lifestyles. And they say lifestyle is the trigger, and genetics is the gun. And so your lifestyle pulls the trigger, and boom, you get hit with the obesity. That's how that happened, and that's the sound through epigenetics. Now you could have the genes for diabetes, obesity, like I'm I'm pretty sure I do as well. My half of my family is black after all. So I'm sure, and my father is currently 300 pounds, type 2 diabetic. So I'm sure the genetic code is in my DNA as well. And my lifestyle never got that out of control for it to be triggered. So there is what people do say is genetics, they are correct. There is a part that genetics plays, and we find out that also there's predispositions to a lot of these other genes that you know get triggered. For example, you may have poor leptin signaling. He talked about a guy that never felt full. And no matter how much he ate, he can never have that feeling of feeling full. Well, come to find out, he had a genetic mutation that caused his leptin signaling to be like 0.2 of what it's supposed to be, 0.2% of what it's supposed to be. So it's like really low. So his body never signaled that he was full. And it was just things like that that are really eye-opening. It's like, okay. So it really does get down to a genetic level of how your body functions, and now with the genetic testing, specifically his testing, curated for certain SNPs that most of the population are facing. Now we can create protocols customized to the most personal level of you, which is your DNA. We can literally customize protocols based on your genetics. It doesn't get any more customizable or personalizable than that. That's down to the very, very, very root of who you are. So I was like, man, this is this is gonna start changing a lot of lives because we can go in there, look at your genetic code, and be like, okay, this gene needs to be turned off, and now you can build muscle better. Or this one needs to be turned on and now you can lose weight better. And with the genetics testing, we also went over peptides and the cutting-edge technology that peptides is becoming as fast as it's becoming, it's important to understand that no, you don't need peptides. No, you don't need a genetics test. No, you don't need any of this. And there are some people who are natural who do not want to take peptides because they they don't want to lose their natural status. I'm one of those people. I'd rather just do it naturally and push my body to its limits. And if I get to a point to where I break down and beyond repair with normal means, then I'll get on peptides or whatnot. But peptides are naturally occurring in the body, so it's not like a steroid. So if that's your concern, then just know that peptides are already occurring in your body. And now they just make them, synthesize them, and add more to accelerate whatever functioning was already naturally occurring, like GOP1s. Your body naturally produces its own GOP1. But then, you know, Oznipic, semagutide, rhino tuti, they met they added in there to accelerate that process of the function of the GOP1. But now we have, we're gonna learn, we're going through a peptide course so we can apply specific peptides alongside your genetics code to have the fastest, most accurate means of getting you to where you want to be. So, not only do we have the capability here at Valhalla Athletics down to look at your genetics code, we're gonna be learning about peptides to accelerate the process. We can also still do the basics of blood work and urine, urine test, and then we have GI. I mean, there's so many, we have so many different tools here that we can get you to where you want to be. And this is another reason why we say, Okay, sure. Everybody always says they want to go to the doctor. Okay, go to your doctor. Your doctor's gonna pull the most basic level of blood work. The most basic. It's not gonna be a full panel, okay, because they don't believe in pulling a full panel, and insurance ties their hands in what they can and can't pull. Okay. Because doctors don't believe, they don't have the same mindset that we have. We're looking for the full spectrum and trends. They're looking for certain markers to prove that the whole body is functioning properly. For example, if you have a thyroid problem and you go to the doctor, they're not gonna pull T4 and T3. 9.9 times out of 10, they are just pulling TSH, thyroid stimulating hormone, and they're looking for high TSH. What does that mean? That means that the thyroid hormone is being stimulated, and in their eyes, if your TSH is good, then that means the rest of them should be good because your pituitary is asking for thyroid hormone to be made. But we know that the thyroid hormone needs to be converted from T4 into T3. So you could have a high TSH, but you could also have dun dun dun dun high T4, okay, because that's what your your your thyroid is asking for to be made, T4, but then inside the gut, the conversion happens at T3, and you can have low T3 because your T4 isn't converted. And if your T3 isn't being converted, guess what your body does? Hey, you gotta make more TS, you gotta make more thyroid hormone. So guess what happens? You make more TSH, you make more T4, not being converted into T3, and your body goes through that negative feedback loop, and next thing you know, your TSH is high, your T4 is high, but your T3 is low because it's not being converted. So sure, it'll show high TSH, but it doesn't matter if it's not being converted in the T3. And there's signs and symptoms for this: slower metabolism, hair thinning, brittle nails, and uh low energy, feeling cold. There's things you know that you will know if you're if you're not making thyroid hormone. But I got off on the tanner there. So that's some of the stuff that we are learning and that we're going over. And our protocols are about to get freaking out of control, crazy. Because now we can just look at your genetic code and we know exactly what we need to focus on. So, oh, and okay, so that was a hyper health summit, man. There's a lot more that we learned, but I don't have no time to go over all of it because I just went off on a tangent there. So, but we also had some really good Mediterranean food there. The kava that we had the first day, those pita chips, I have dreams about them. I have dreams about them. Bro, they were phenomenal. And the hummus, holy crap, bro. I never I never thought I would have some of the best hummus, or maybe the best hummus in my life, from a food truck in Miami. Kava's was good as hell too, and I've been to Middle Eastern countries. I've been to Middle Eastern countries, and I didn't have helmets as good as I had from Kava and a and a food truck. So I thought that was crazy. But alright. I bet I have so much more I can talk about via me, but we gotta get off of it, cuz I wanna get into this episode. Now, this episode is gonna be interesting. And it might trigger some people, but you know it needs to be said because the whole point of anything I do is to help me. And I like to help people up regardless of how you may feel about how I'm helping you. And you can be mad at me, you can be triggered, but what I want you to understand is take away the information I'm saying, is what I'm saying helpful to you? Because that's all that matters. If it is invoking emotion, then I'm probably hitting the nail on the head. And that's what we want. We want you to feel some type of way about what I'm saying, because it's probably applying to your life. But if it is applying to your life, instead of turning away from what I'm saying, just listen to what I'm saying and you know, run it through your life. Because at the end of the day, this is your life. Do you not want to feel better and live better and be in a better relationship and become a better person? So, with that out of the way, I want to talk about a big issue I said in relationships, and I think I touched on this a little bit in the previous relationship, in the previous episode, I don't remember which one. But I'm gonna touch on it here. So when you're in a dating s dating phase, and I'm gonna focus just on women right now. When you're in a dating phase, as a woman, the biggest issue I see, and while a lot of you don't get pit, and a lot of you have been in relationships now for five, six, seven years and don't have a ring, it's because you're not acting like a wife. Oh, what is what does that even mean? Not acting like a wife. Well, you're not doing certain things that a wife would do because you're waiting for the ring to do it, and that's the wrong mindset to have. And I'll tell you this, as a man, when Stephanie and I were in our dating phase, if you even want to call it that, because I don't I don't really excuse me. We didn't actually date like that. But she was already doing things that were wifely behavior. You know, she was making food, she was meal prepping, she was cleaning, she was taking care of me, making sure that I was okay, asking me about my day, uh you know the nurturing responsibilities of a wife. And that's when we were just a boyfriend, girlfriend. So on top of her having the same, you know, values, morals, mindset, principles similar to mine, that was a no-brainer. So out of listen, I'm not trying to brag, okay? But I had a lineup of women that I could have gotten with outside of Stephanie. But like I told her the day, I was like, there's a there's a difference between those women and you because I don't know why she does this. She tries to make it sound like she's some basic average boring woman, and that I could just leave her and go get anybody. I don't know why she does that, and I hate that she does that. And I tell her, I think stop doing that. Like, and I told her, I said, the difference between those women and you is they weren't you, they didn't do what you did.

SPEAKER_01 19:27

They don't act like you, they don't talk like you, they don't move like you.

Why Men Stay And Still Stray

SPEAKER_02 19:34

They don't give me the same feeling of peace that you do. The difference between them is like you're when you're when you're here, when you're when you're here, I feel present. And when you're gone, it is very abundantly clear that you are not here. I mean, after I was like, I I guess I could just be with them if I really wanted to. And when they were gone, it was like peaceful when they were gone. And I was like, wow, I'm just I get to chill. So I didn't see them the same way that I saw her. When she wasn't around me, bro, like when we would when we would go hang out, and I would have to leave. Oh my god, bro, that was the most painful thing ever, having to leave. And I was like, bro, I just want more. I need more of her. And I didn't get that feeling with these other women. And now, like today, she's in she's in PR for her drill, abundantly clear that she is not here. I can't sleep. The house is quiet. Like I want to have a conversation, and I can't because she's gone. The gym just feels so empty. Cause I don't have my freaking my ride or die. And it's like I wake up, nobody's there. It's just not the same, bro. Just life just feels so empty when she's not around. And I literally try to find things to do outside of the house because I have nothing to come home to. When I'm at the gym, bro, I take a little bit longer, I'll go to H E B. I'll just try to buy my time, but still at the end of the day, I gotta come home to an empty house because she's not here. I just don't like it. So that's the feeling she gave me during the dating phase. And even more so now. And like I said, why did I get That feeling from her because she was already doing it making me feel like I was a husband. It was like she she had such a high expectation of me that made me want to elevate myself. I was like, wow, she expects so much out of me that I need to be better. And like I said in my other episode, I can't remember which one. When you find a good woman, they will elevate a man past his limits. A lot of men will get to their limit. And why do you hit your limit? Because you have nothing really to live for other than yourself. So boom, you find a good woman who's a ride or die that has high expectations, and you're like, oh man, I gotta rise to this, and then you elevate. Same thing with when you have kids. Now you're having a kid, you get pushed past to another, you get pushed past those limits. Because now I gotta be a good example. Now I gotta make sure I'm on my P's and Q's. I want my kid to look at me and be like, man, that's my dad. So there's phases in your life, and there's people in your life who can push you past your limits. More specifically, a good woman. But a lot of these women nowadays are growing up in this generation, and they are not, they don't have the same capacity to elevate their man because they they are not good women. These women don't want any of the responsibilities until they get a ring. And until they get a ring, they will continue to just be in their girlfriend era. They'll say things like, I'm not gonna cook or clean, I'm not married. Why do I need to do that? I'm not doing nothing until I get a ring. And then you wonder why you don't have a ring. Or you wonder why you've been in a relationship five, six, seven years, no ring. You wonder why he's talking to all these other women. I don't know if you guys know this, but I am a man, and I know how men think. And if I had to even go deeper into that, I'd probably know how men think better than a lot of men because not only am I a man, but I am very logical when it comes to life. And that was one of the reasons why my worldview was so easily manipulated into cynicism. Because logically speaking, you can't really trust anybody. At the end of the day, if the gun is to my head and the gun is to your head, you're going to choose yourself. I can't trust you to choose me. So I applied that across the board to a bunch of situations, and that's how my cynicism was really really born. So when I say I know men, it's because logically speaking, I know men. And when, for example, if you're dating a man, say you're going on a first date, he's going to know, based on that first date, if he wants to be with you or not. And now, now, granted, there are the ones that fall through the cracks, and there's a lot of immature men and a lot of playboys. Okay, we're whatever. We're talking about men who are looking to settle down. Based on that first date. Because if he's already made up his mind that he's ready to settle down, he's looking for specific qualities in a wife. He's looking for a girlfriend, he's looking for a wife. So if you go into the first date acting like a girlfriend, then this is what's gonna happen. He's ready to settle down, and then he's tired of looking. And if you have tendencies as a girlfriend that could potentially bloom into wife qualities, and you don't do enough to pester him, and he could tolerate a multitude of your behaviors, he's gonna settle for you. Okay, he's gonna settle for you. Now, is that necessarily a good thing? Obviously not. Is it a bad thing? Yes and no. Because you don't want a man just to settle for you because he's tired of looking, and you have enough, but not enough to swim. And that's what happens, and then he gets with you, and then a year goes by, and then he realizes you're not what he was looking for, but he's already in it, he doesn't want to look for anything else, and then he'll just get what he needs outside of relationship from other women. Because a lot because men can be in relationships. We have a high more we have a far more higher tolerable stress component than women do. We can put up with way more than y'all can. So when people are like, Well, why would he just stay in a relationship when he could just leave? Because it doesn't bother us. You gotta understand something, it doesn't bother us. We can do it because it doesn't bother us. This isn't my last marriage for eight years. Excuse me. Eight years, and Stephanie asked me, you know, why didn't you just divorce earlier? There's a bunch of different reasons that I could give you, and I can go to the the nuance, but what I said is is because it didn't bother me, she didn't do enough stuff that would push me out of the marriage. Like I could tolerate all of the stuff that she was doing, so it didn't bother me enough for me to just like but like I said, I am living proof because of the things that she did give me, I sought them outside the relationship. Most men want somebody to come home to. Because at the end of the day, we are still human beings and we crave emotional connection, we crave affection, we crave that coming home to somebody feeling, knowing that somebody's there for us. We want that. I could come home to her, but what I didn't have is everything else that I needed, but it wasn't enough to make me just eh. And I was like, okay, well, if I can just get the rest from outside relationship and come home to somebody, then win win. So if that's if that was my mindset, what do you think the mindset of these other guys are? I'm telling you, bro, they're the same, they're thinking the same thing that I am. So when I tell you, if you want to succeed in this world as a woman and find you a good man, you need to have the qualities of a wife. And there's a lot of these red pill podcasters out here that saying that say this like stupid stuff like, well, what separates you from every other woman? Listen, what separates you from every other woman is you, like I said with these other women, they cannot replace Stephanie. And I'd be hard pressed to find any other woman out here that could replace her because of how she is uniquely different from a lot of the women, and I've talked to a lot of women that I've interacted with, they they just are not her. I don't know how else to put it. So therefore, I'm not looking for other women, I'm not talking to other women. And the conversations that I do have with other women, like at the Hyper Health Summit, or where we're where she's introduced me to people, or just our day-to-day interactions with our friends, or you know, the people we talked to at the gym, it just resolidifies like holy crap, these women couldn't even reach her if they had a spaceship. So if you are uniquely you, then that is what was for you from these other women. You don't you don't need to have some special skill or special talent that's gonna make you completely different from them. All you need to have is the capacity to be a good wife, and that is not even about cooking or cleaning, that's about having the that is like when I'm like, well, I don't cook or clean, but it's like I'm willing to do it, I'm willing to learn. That's what you need to have. You don't have to have any of this stuff right now, but the willingness to change is what gives a man hope. Like, oh man, because you could be the best girl in the world, and he's head over heels for you, and you could be missing some things. But if you're willing to do those things, I guarantee it, you will get a ring. Guarantee it. And this goes for the this goes for the women who are in these relationships now. Think about what you do for your man. And it and it's crazy to say this, but I guarantee, I guarantee it, that you as a woman don't do near as much as my wife does. I don't even believe you do a fraction of what she does for me.

SPEAKER_01 34:33

And then you guys sit here and wonder why you don't have a ring.

SPEAKER_02 34:44

You don't get a ring if you don't act like a wife. That's just point-playing period. There's no if and buts about that. And if you don't have a ring, it's because he doesn't see you as worthy enough to marry. But like I said, you don't do enough to make him not want to leave because he can tolerate it, because we have a higher stress threshold. And logically speaking, it doesn't make sense to him to find another woman when he could just stay with you and talk to other women. I'm telling you right now, if you've been in a relationship longer than two years, no ring, he's talking to other women. That is a guarantee. Guarantee. And that is why you, as a woman, have to understand these things. Because you guys can't have a battle. Okay, this is what happens. Most of you guys will compete about who should change for who.

SPEAKER_01 36:25

That's what it comes down to. I'm not gonna change for him because he won't change for me. You need to understand something logically speaking, from a man, I hold all the cards when it comes to giving you the ring.

SPEAKER_02 36:49

So it would behoove you to act like a wife if you want a ring. Because if you're trying to wait out a man, you're not gonna- That's a war of attrition.

SPEAKER_01 37:02

You're not going to win. You're just not going to win.

Commitment Fears And Closing Thoughts

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SPEAKER_02 37:13

There was this there was this reel I posted about giving passwords, like a good man will give his passwords and username logging information to his wife, to show that he that she can trust him. And some chick on there said, well, that that would prevent him from cheating because he can just cheat at the club, and she's gonna find out anyways. Listen, if I don't want you to find out that I'm cheating, you ain't never going to find out. Because I understand how things work. And there are men that have I know a I know of a man who was living a completely different life. Ten years. He had a whole nother family, and I'm sure there's plenty other stories like this, had a whole other family. Ten years. Meanwhile, she's waiting around for a ring. Then she finds out that he has a whole nother family. And I was telling Stephanie, I was like, you gotta understand something. He's been doing it for 10 years, hasn't got caught. Do you really think that he got caught? Or did he just finally decide that he was ready to be done with her and move on to his actual family? So when I tell you, you're not gonna be able to wait out a guy. And the fact that you aren't willing to be what's that word I'm looking for, submissive to a guy, that is the reason why you don't have a ring. Because you guys think it should be the other way around, and that you shouldn't have to be submissive, that you guys are equal. Okay, you keep thinking that however long you want to, and you continue to not have a ring. And then you'll eventually run into the guy who is tired of looking, and he just landed on you. You have enough qualities, and he could tolerate the rest, and then he just marries you, and then he'll get the rest of what he wants outside the relationship. That's your fate. That is your fate. Because a lot of you mother freaking women want these quote air quotes high-valued men. You're not you're not ready to handle a high-value man if you're not ready to submit to your role in the relationship. And you don't that doesn't need to be a high value man. That that's with any man, but one that is of high value is not gonna waste his time. Like, God forbid, but if something happened to Stephanie, like she died or something, I am one thousand percent terrified of ever having to date again because I don't want to deal with this generation's women thinking that every that we're all equal, that we should be equal in everything, and we should all assist with whatever, and there's no root gender roles and none of that. Like, bro, I don't want to deal with that. I don't want to deal with that. Your role, the blender roles, as a woman, is to be a wife. That's all I want. I want a wife who cooks, cleans, that takes care of me. That's all we want. And in turn, we take care of her. That's all we want. That's the simplest and purest form. And if you can just do that, then you will get a ring. And if you're doing that, and you still don't have a ring, it's time to do some detective work. Or maybe there are aspects of your character that are preventing him from giving you a ring. Or maybe he's not ready to settle down. Which I doubt that one. But there's a bunch of things I could say. And like I said, if you've been going on two years now and you don't have a ring, he's talking to other women. Or you're not, you're, you're you're not doing wifely things. But if you're acting like a wife, cooking, cleaning, taking care of him, asking about his day, nurturing him, pampering him, being your feminine, you ain't got no ring, and it's been two plus years. Oh, yeah, he definitely talked to other women. That's for certain. But yeah. Because they do also play a part. But I'm telling you right now, dude. No guy is going to change for a woman that he does not deem worthy. I'm telling you that right now. This is why I say the woman has to change first. She has to be willing to. Sacrifice her pride as a sign of good faith. But then the guy will realize, oh man, this is a good one. I can't let her get away, and then he will change. I'm telling you, that's just the way it works. So if you're not if you're not willing to sacrifice your pride and be the first one that changes, then you're gonna be in a war of attrition for a few months. And if you find it hard to do that, then you need to ask yourself, why do you find it so hard? Because I know a lot of women say they don't want to give up their independence and depend fully upon a man. And I get it, but it comes back full circle. Why do you think my cynicism is a thing? If you're not willing to fully depend on the man, that means you fully don't trust the man. And if you fully don't trust the man, then there's always gonna be seeds of doubt in different aspects or in different parts in your relationship. So if you don't fully trust somebody, then you're not gonna really commit to the relationship. So if you're afraid, then you need to you know ask yourself why. And then if you aren't afraid and you're ready, then you need to fully commit. Because if you always give yourself a backdoor, then you that means you're not putting your 100% effort into the relationship. And I know it's scary because there's been a lot of women who have done things like that and been left high and dry. So they have a bad taste in their mouth and they bring that into the next relationship, trauma, and it tears apart that relationship now that God has trauma, and then it just continues the cycle. So at the end of the day, when you're dating somebody, you need to take the dating phase serious. And this is why I say guys will know, guys will know when they found the right one because they're gonna find one that is not afraid to be dependent upon them, and they're gonna know instantly like this is the one. So we'll talk about the guys next time. But hopefully you guys, and I'll talk about some more Miami next time, too. But hopefully you guys enjoyed this episode. If you did, don't forget to like, excuse me, comment, and share, and leave that five star review. And until next time.