The Big Update Episode: All the things all at once

In this special update episode, host Kat Garcia shares a series of big life changes happening all at once. Kat opens up about the emotional decision to surrender her cat Lilly, reflects on moving out of her longtime home, and talks about starting a new remote job and graduate school term. Through honest storytelling, Kat explores the mix of grief, hope, and excitement that comes with major transitions. Tune in for heartfelt updates, relatable moments, and a reminder that change—while challenging—can also bring new beginnings.

Transcript

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Greetings and salutations. Welcome to, sorry. That's my inside voice. I'm your host Cat Garcia, and today is an update day. That's right Time for some live updates from the house full of cats. Um, so the first update, um, is kind of sad by kind of, I mean, it's sad, but I like to keep you in the loop when I can. Um. So some of you may have seen pictures of a certain ginger lily, um, in the last couple of months with a cone, and she has been not feeling great for quite a while and slowly. Getting worse. Um, and so I made the difficult decision to, uh, surrender her to the local Humane Society. They were great. Their communication was phenomenal. Um, they at no point made me feel bad or guilty, um, for surrendering her to them. Um. They were, they were wonderful, lovely people to talk to. Um, funny story, the main person I communicated with, her name was also Lily. So when I would call and talk to Lily, we would talk about Lily. It got a little confusing. Um, but as of last Monday, uh, which would be October 27th. Um, Lily is no longer with me. Um, she is going to be getting all the medical care she could possibly need. Um, they got her started on antibiotics right away. They're not sure what's going on with her. I wasn't sure what's going on with her, but it was outside of my ability to address and care for. Um, and. One of the hardest things about being a pet parent is recognizing that the hardest thing to do is the best thing for them. Um, and that's absolutely what happened in this scenario. Um, Lily's quality of life has just been so, so much lower than it should be, and. You know, her being sick and being in a cone. Nobody wants that at all. Um, and it's been quite a while. And the other girls were, were significantly impacted by Lily being sick as well. Um, they have been looking for her less this week. Um, but the first couple of days they would. You know, kind of go walking around looking Nala, came out of my room multiple times, stared me dead in the eyes and yelled at me, stopped yelling, continued to stare at me, and then walked away. So they were definitely looking for her. I did explain to them what happened. Um, and, you know, they are adjusting to being a three cat household again. Um, they didn't get very long the last time, so this is definitely an adjustment, but they're doing okay. Um, I've been getting snuggles with everybody, which has been nice. Um, with Lily sick and just struggling. Um, she had been getting lots and lots of snuggles, needing lots and lots of snuggles and. The other girls, I think were also feeling a little jealous of that. Um, so everybody's been getting all the snuggles. I mean, there's ala so ALA's snuggle amount has, if not stayed the same, increased slightly. But, um, Lily will always be my first ginger, and it's very quiet in the house now that she's not here. Um. My house is typically fairly quiet. It's me and the cats. Um, sometimes there's an audio book, sometimes there's music, but a lot of the time it's just me getting yelled at by cats. Um, with Lily and the Cone and struggling with depth perception and spatial reasoning and being a ginger cat, uh, that trifecta introduced a lot of, um. A lot of loud sudden sounds, uh, and scratching of her cone. She went through four cones in the, and a donut in the time that she was using them. Um, and when I say went through, uh, I mean they were no longer usable when I took them off of her. Because she had scratched and bitten through parts of it. Uh, and these, yeah, they had really great reviews on the interwebs. But, um, when you have a cat who really, really doesn't wanna wear it, it makes it kind of hard. Um, so I miss her very, very much. Um, surrendering her is one of the hardest things that I've done as a pet parent. And I just, like I said, I wanted to keep you guys in the loop so you won't hear a lily anymore on the pod. Um, which makes me sad, but I know that she's getting the care and attention that she needs, and she is going to be so happy in a new home when she is cleared to be adopted out. Um. I have had a couple people in my personal life ask if I would adopt her when she's better. And the answer to that is no. Um, she was not happy in my home with the other girls. I think some of it is I have a, a clouder of old ladies like Lucy, Nala and Ala are all old ladies. Um. I think Nala was born an old lady, but I, no, she was, she was, I've had her since she was like a kitten in the palm of my hand. She's been an old lady forever. Um, and Lily was still very much a kitten and that dynamic created tension and, uh, was not, was not great for everybody. So. I would not adopt her again. Um, like I would not adopt her back from the shelter because that wouldn't be fair to her. It wouldn't be fair to the other three. And I know that there's a home out there. There are people out there who will love her as much as I do and will give her the home she needs to be successful. Um, now don't get me wrong, I bawled like a baby. Uh, the entire drive home after I surrendered her, I bawled like a baby most of the time on the way to the appointment because at that point I didn't know if I would be surrendering her that day or if we would have to wait. Um, so there was a lot of anxiety around the whole scenario. A lot of guilt and a lot of just grief. Um. But at the end of the day, I did the best thing for my baby, for my furry baby. And that's just what I remind myself when the guilt hits. Um, so for those of you who, uh, might be listening and have different opinions about the decisions that I made, I. I recognize that you have different opinions and respectfully, I don't need them or want them. So thank you. Um, all we can do is the best we can do, and recognizing that I wasn't the best fit for her was one of the hardest decisions I've had to make. Um, yeah. So that is update number one. Um, update number two. Is happier. Uh, it's stressful, but it's a different kind of stress. Hello, ALA. Hello. My Stage nine Clinger. She sees a bird out the window and must stand on me while witnessing this bird or a square roll. Hard to tell. I think it's a squirrel roll. And those are our mortal enemies, as you may remember. Um. But the exciting news is I am moving. Um, for those of you who have listened to some of the earlier episodes, I have definitely mentioned the fact that, uh, I have lived in my current dwelling longer than, um. Most people have lived in an apartment or in some cases one home. Um, so I have been here we are in, let's see, I moved in in August of 2009. Two two to three to 4, 2 5. Yes. I'm counting with my fingers. Um. So we are in year 16. Um, and after all this time, I am moving. Um, I'm very excited about this. I am more excited to be moved than to be moving. Um. One of the reasons I've stayed put for so long is I moved like seven times in two years, two and a half years. And so I just decided I was done for a little bit and I was gonna stay put, um, staying put. And 16 years were not as a plan to begin with. Um, but that's what happened. And I'm so thankful to have had. This level of stability for 16 years. I mean, this apartment has seen me through my first round of college, my multiple attempts to finish my degree, finishing my degree, being married, being divorced. Um, online dating. Online dating, uh, having no pets. Having pets, and. Every job I've had as a professional adult. So there has been a lot of life lived in this house. Um, and it's time for a new chapter. So, um, episodes shocker, uh, have been. Less frequent. I was on a roll there for like a month, you guys. I was like, drop in new episodes, like every week. Uh, and then like the packing started, and one thing I've learned is that when you start packing, one thing you should do is think about the things that you're going to need during the packing process. Right. That makes sense. You know you're gonna need, uh, toiletries. Don't pack those. You're definitely gonna need some clothes. Don't pack all of those. In my case, you're gonna need a, a lot of yarn. The sheer amount of yarn that I have already taken to storage or uh, rehomed to uh, new crocheters, uh, is impressive. I'll send a picture the next time I take any storage. You're welcome. Um, don't pack your cats. That's a good one. I packed a lot of their toys and so they're grumpy with me, so I'm gonna have to bring some of those back in the house. Um, but the other thing that you should be aware of is probably don't pack your podcast equipment. Um, which guess what? I did that, I did that. So I am currently podcasting with, um. Like an apple in-ear wired headset situation, uh, like little earbuds. And it's not terrible. Uh, I don't know if it's great, but it's not the worst thing I've recorded with. Um, but yeah, don't, don't pack the things you're gonna still need to use. During the packing process. So I am in the process of moving. I've been getting rid of things, many trips to, uh, to donate items, um, figuring out how to, uh, spatially reason the space I'm going to be living in. I will be living with people again for the first time in five years. Um. Yeah, that's the last time I lived with anybody, uh, bef like before I got divorced. Um, and this time I am living with, um, my, some friends. It's gonna be amazing. I'm super excited. Um. The girls will not be the only animal. So that will be an adjustment. But I believe in their ability to exist in my room. Um, but I'm also gonna be setting up like a catio type space for them that's covered outside. So we're gonna see how that goes. Um, but yes, so there is a lot of transition happening for me right now. Um. Which is their up update. Number three, I started a new job because, you know, why do one thing at a time when you can just do all the things at once, right? Like that's, that makes sense and doesn't cause stress to anybody ever. Totally does. Um, so I started a new job this week. I'm very excited about it. It is, um, a hundred percent remote. It is fully in line with my, uh, professional goals. It's a super flexible, welcoming environment and I am so excited. Um, yeah. And here's what's interesting. So I was talking to my brother and my PLP because they're people that I talk to and when I have big things coming and I wanna like just talk it out. Um, and this transition between jobs is the first time in my career as an adult, um, where I was working at a job that I really enjoyed. And another opportunity presented itself and I left the job to take that opportunity. So when the universe throws something in front of you, you have a couple choices, okay? Uh, one choice is you ignore it. You just straight up ignore it. Pretend you didn't see it. Pretend it never happened. Option two. You just straight up tell the universe no thank you under any circumstances, and you walk away. The third option is you say, yes, universe. I will recognize this opportunity that you have literally thrown into my lap that I was not expecting or looking for. I will take this opportunity. Thank you. I feel like those are the four options. Um, and in one of those scenarios, you don't tell the universe to fuck right off. And I feel like that is not, I don't wanna tempt fate from high atop the thing. Okay? I'm not gonna go around, turn or go outside, turn around three times, spit and curse. Okay. It's not happening. That is a West Wing reference. If you missed it, that's not my fault. It's election night. You should go watch it. And it's also actually election night, so you should drink or take some Xanax, I don't know. Whatever you need to do to cope. Um, sorry. I squirreled. Ooh, yes. Choices. So I went with option three and honest to goodness, this job. Like I said, was not something that I was looking for. It was not something that I was like actively asking about. Um, it was just all of a sudden this opportunity was presented to me and it was an, it was an amazing opportunity. It is an amazing, I'm so excited. Um. And in a lot of ways it's different than what I've done before. It's very similar to things I've done before at the same time. Um, ugh, I'm really excited. So that is also a transition that's happening and 'cause there's a gotta be an and Right, and I am wrapping up my first grad term. As an intern, and I'm starting my second grad term as an intern in the month of November. So just, there's a lot of transition happening, uh, for me right now. And you know, when that happens, you have to prioritize things. And, uh, as much as I love chitchatting with y'all, um. I have not been prioritizing my recordings as much as I could be. I do have, um, some more guest episodes coming down the pipe, so do not fret. Um, I've had a lot of fun recording with these fabulous humans. Um, and like thinking about it, I am so excited that I know so many great people who. Are open to talking about life, about their mental health and like how cool is that? It also makes me feel like, oh, this is that I should be doing too. Like it's all falling together. You know when you're working on a puzzle and you're almost done, but you have like five pieces that all look really similar and you're like, what the fuck? And you've got like six places to put them. You're like, obviously something is missing. There's a last piece that's looking around here somewhere. You look under a cat, that's always my first suggestion. Look under a cat, uh, or look under the table. 'cause pieces like to just disappear under tables or under cats. Um. So those are good places to look for puzzle pieces. But for me right now, I feel like the puzzle pieces are all like falling into place. Um, which is great 'cause now I can start a new puzzle. Ha, ooh, I wonder what my metaphorical life puzzle will look like. Now I gotta come up with a design so I have it in my brain. Um, but yeah, so lots of, lots of pieces. Are moving right now. Lots of pieces falling into place. Lots of transitions. My house is full of boxes, which the cats appreciate. Um, me less so, but it's a good thing, you know, it's happening and we're just, we're just taking it a day at a time, a box at a time. There is nothing on my walls in my house right now. Um, which is so bizarre to me. I don't like blank walls. They, they, um, stress me out. They don't make me anxious. They stress me out. So one of the first things I did, um, not the first things, but one of the early things that I did, um, when I really started the moving process is I took everything off my walls. Like it came down in phases. Um, but there's nothing on my walls except like command hook strips that I need to peel off and like nails. I have to, like, I've been here for 16 years, guys. There are nails in the walls. Um, but. Yeah, no, the, so the walls are blank. And I did that for a couple reasons. Like I even took the magnets and pictures and like Christmas cards off the back of my metal door. 'cause I have a fire door 'cause I have an apartment and it's metal. So I stick things to it. Well, not anymore. And the reason that I took everything off the walls and took everything down was that I knew it would make me feel so. Stressed out and, uh, not necessarily uncomfortable, but unhappy with my echoy space. Also, echoy space is not really conducive to podcasting right now. I feel like I'm echoing and I'm yelling 'cause there's nothing to absorb sound. Um, but I knew that if I did that it would help motivate me to continue to pack and get things situated. Um. So I'm moving a little bit at a time. Um, the house, I'm moving, I'm moving into a house. Um, the room I'm moving into, I did a thing that I have always wanted to do my entire life, but I've never, I've never done it. Um, so, so while. This trans, this transition has been in process since like July is really when the conversations about it happening started. Um, and oh, I squirreled again. Gosh, I did not have coffee today. Can you tell? I can tell. Um, oh, so I've been moving a little bit at a time, uh, for the last month. But really, really truly moving in the last couple of weeks, um, like a couple pieces of bigger furniture went up, um, the cats had been grumpy because the couch was one of the first pieces of furniture to go up. Um, I had the opportunity to use, utilize somebody else's moving truck. Um, and they were like, how about you bring over some of the pieces of furniture? They're gonna go up to the house and that way. You don't have to worry about it later. I'm like, my giant couch that won't fit in my car is a great option. Um, so the couch went, uh, table and chairs a couple other things were the first things to go up. Cats got mad because they could not all snuggle with me on the couch. They've had to settle for the blue chair, which is not as happy for them. They can't all fit well, they can't all fit well. Um, but because this has been kind of like a, a longer process. I got to do a thing that I've always wanted to do. I got to paint my new bedroom a color. Um, it's been super exciting. I have been like giddy, like squeaky giddy, jumping and clapping about this room. Um, I picked the color. Was the help of my friend, Tricia, friend of the pod, and uh, she helped me with the purple. The first purple we picked ended up being very pink. Uh, so I picked a different purple with her help. Um, yeah. I was gonna make you all guess what color, but that's silly because I had purple hair and purple is clearly my favorite color. So this color of purple is, I don't remember what color it is exactly. I'll find out. It's from Sherwin Williams. It's like is is near purple? Something like, I call it aggressive ine because I like OMA PIs. Um, for those of you who don't know, an INE is an eggplant. That's what they call it in other countries. Okay. We call it an eggplant. Have you ever seen a purple egg? Like what the hell? Who was stoned off their asses and named eggplant? Eggplant. It's purple with a green stem. Eggs come out of birds. They're usually like. Various shades of white cream, brown, blueish, sometimes a little greenish, but like I have not heard of a purple egg coming out of a chicken or an ostrich or an emu, have you? No. So I've been calling it aggressive OB gene. Um, but it's gorgeous. I got to tape off the whole room. I. I'm so happy it's such a good purple. Um, yes, don't worry. I will post pictures. It's amazing. But again, it's a transition. I have never in my life had a room that was not some shade of white, um, ever, ever. So this is really exciting for me. It's gonna be covered, of course, in lights. Uh, and cat things and cats. So it's gonna be a whole process. I'm really excited. I will continue to take pictures so you guys can see. I'm hoping to have a little pod space in there. Um, I've got ideas, but nothing is solid or set in stone yet. Um, but these are the things that are going on and you guys like to hear about the update. So this is the big update episode. Um, lots of things all at once. Some of them happy, some of them sad. It's surprising the amount of grief that comes with even positive transitions, right? So surrendering Lily is a lot of grief and it hits, it hits in waves, you know. There are parts of the house I haven't vacuumed because there are just little tufts of lily feathers because at the end she was, she was, she had scratched off a portion of her back where there were like no feathers at all. Um, and so I just, there are areas that I have not vacuumed because there are still lily feathers and my heart gets sad because once they're gone it's like she's gone. Um, even though like a rational brain is like like the physicality of her being here will be gone. Um, and so there's the grief and then there's also like the, the hopefulness that she will find, excuse me, a new family to love her and give her the right space. And the relief, knowing that she'll be getting the care she needs, when I was able to recognize I couldn't give her that. Um, so that's a lot of layers. And then the, the joy and excitement of moving to a new place is so big and so happy. And there's also the grief of like closing a chapter. And leaving this place that has been the focus or the center point for so many memories. Good memories and bad memories and sad memories. Um, but it's like, it's like saying goodbye to a part of myself, like leaving this apartment. It's really funny. You know, I, I joke with some of my, some of my friends who have I, who I've known since I've been here, or before I've been, I've moved in here and the joke was always like, well, you know exactly where to find me. The same place I've been since 2009. And now that won't be true. Like, that won't be true at all. Um, if people wanna know where I am, they have to be like, yo, where are you? 'cause. Not that people just show up at my house, 'cause that's weird. But, um, you know, people know where to find me. So for people who wanna send Christmas cards, uh, I've got a new address. So just know that, thank goodness for USPS forwarding. Um, but lots of change and, and grief and joy and excitement and trepidation and. Like all of these feelings at the same time. So I wanted to update you on these really significant changes that are happening and happening all at once. And if I'm quieter than I had been, there's a reason. And this time it's not just because depression. Uh, let's, let's be clear though. Depressive, expressy. Is here, like she's in residence, but there are other things. There are positive, good things happening too. So with that, the Kaz and I are gonna go, um, if you're not already, please, uh, like shares, subscribe wherever you listen. If you have the time and the inclination, leave us a review wherever you're listening. Do it for the other podcast you listen to. It makes a huge difference. I squeal with glee every time I see one. Um, make sure you're following us on Instagram and Facebook and stay tuned for more updates. We'll talk to y'all soon. Bye.