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Up-Level Your Life with Mindy
Up-Level Your Life with Mindy
Awakening Your Authentic Self with TJ Jones
TJ Jones shares his transformational journey from corporate success and burnout to developing the Caring Warrior philosophy and ICARE model for authentic leadership and personal growth.
• The Caring Warrior concept combines strength with compassion, creating leaders who show up with love first
• TJ's personal collapse in his flowerbed marked a turning point after years of repressing childhood trauma while pursuing external success
• The body physically stores unprocessed emotions and experiences, often manifesting as physical symptoms when ignored
• The ICARE model provides a framework for authenticity: Intention, Connection, Awareness, Resilience, and Engagement
• Separating yourself from your thoughts by viewing them as passing clouds creates freedom from negative thought patterns
• Simple daily practices like morning intentions, loving-kindness mantras, movement, and journaling create profound shifts over time
• Seeing the beauty in yourself is fundamental to wellbeing and authentic living
Find TJ Jones at timothyjjones.com or subscribe to his newsletter "The Inner GPS" for more guidance on your journey to authentic living and leadership.
To learn more about Mindy CLICK HERE
hey friends, this is your host, mindy duff, and you're listening to up level your life with mindy, your number one personal growth podcast that will bring you closer to uncovering your greatest self. As a certified holistic health and nutrition coach, I created this podcast for anyone who desires to improve physically, emotionally and spiritually. I'll be interviewing experts and sharing tips and tricks that have helped not only my clients, but that have guided me on my own transformational journey. I believe that we all have a greatness that lies within. We just need to uncover it. Are you ready to level up? Then let's begin. Hi everyone and welcome back to Uplevel your Life with Mindy. I am your host, mindy Duff, and I have a special guest with me.
Mindy:Today I'm going to be chatting with TJ Jones, and he is a leadership coach, a speaker, the author of the book the Caring Warrior Awaken your Power to Lead, influence and Inspire, and we are for sure going to talk about that in a little bit here. Tj has decades of experience guiding high achievers. Tj has decades of experience guiding high achievers and he helps busy professionals who feel stretched thin, burned out or unsure of what's next, so that they can realign with their inner strength and purpose. His I Care model, a transformative framework rooted in intention, connection, awareness, resilience and engagement offers a powerful path to personal mastery. Awareness, resilience and engagement offers a powerful path to personal mastery. Through practical wisdom and soulful guidance, tj helps people rise above overwhelm and lead from a place of clarity, courage and peace. So, tj, thank you for being on the show today.
TJ:Thank you for having me. That's quite an intro. I appreciate it.
Mindy:Well it's quite the work that you're doing, and I always make my guests. You know I like to read your formal bio, but I always like to hear, in your own words, tell me what it is that you do. We heard the formal version, but what do you really do?
TJ:is to remind the people that I get to work with that they're not alone, that we all have challenges, struggles, self-doubt, and they come in so many forms, and so, ultimately, my goal is to help others to find the courage to be who they are.
Mindy:Yeah, and that's. I mean, that's such a. It's an ambitious goal, but I think that's one of the most important goals for anybody that's working in a profession where you're helping other people. We all need to be, be more of who we really are, and you're going to have so much more success and happiness and fulfillment. I think when you do that and I'm sure that you see some of that in your work, and I know that your work has led you to writing this book, and I want to make sure that we have time, so we're going to talk about this book first, so you have a book.
TJ:The.
Mindy:Caring Warrior, Tell me what's this book about and what led you to writing it.
TJ:Yeah, it's really. The Caring warrior is a paradox, right, you don't necessarily put the word caring with warrior because we assume it means, you know, conflict or aggressiveness, and I put the two together because my belief is that a true warrior is a warrior for good, authentic self, to have some understanding, awareness and control of their emotions and the way that they feel, but also the way that they interact with others. And you know, the caring warrior doesn't need to fight. The caring warrior shows up with love first and a desire to help.
Mindy:Yeah, I love that perspective, and so were you just inspired to write this just based on you know your work with other people? Were you just inspired to write this just based on you know your work with other people? Or I mean how, how, what even led you to writing a book is no small feat. So what led you to?
TJ:Yeah, well, you know you I've certainly enjoyed listening to your podcasts and where you've interviewed people, but also where you've, you know, done it on your own. And I think you mentioned in one that you felt maybe you were weird in your childhood or as a younger person, and I relate to that. An example of that would be that I might go and play in a game and come home and listen to classical music or just doodle on the side and just a very sensitive, creative side would engage in conversations with people of all ages and just a real curiosity for life. And that sensitivity, frankly, I always kind of thought was a weakness, and so the way that I progressed through life, things seemed to be really good, lots of blessings. I was able to transition from being a high school teacher into the corporate world. I got into a leadership position very early on and, you know, was able to handle that learning curve to the point where I, you know, there was success and rewards and along the way not that this is secondary, but I got married and was able to have four healthy children and the big house and the cars and that fairy tale sort of thing breaking inside. I was rushing, running toward all those things that we think are success. But inside I had repressed a lot of challenges from my childhood, some trauma, abuse from someone outside the family that was supposed to be a role model, and it eventually all caught up to me and I literally collapsed in the flowerbed of my front yard. And it's funny to explain it. It was rapid and intense and scary, but also slow motion at the same time, and that was the beginning of realizing that I had been on a path sort of running away from that emptiness and that need to become my more authentic self. So that was the beginning. My more authentic self. So that was the beginning.
TJ:But the idea, the philosophy behind the Caring Warrior came from a memory that I had in some of those darkest days where, when I was teaching a leadership seminar as an employee of a corporation, I hired a modern day samurai to come in and we used the Bushido virtues as a way to teach people who are going to become managers and leaders some of the principles of what it would take to be successful, and the end of the day or the end of the week, and at the end of the day or the end of the week, he presented me in front of the class with a print that had Japanese symbols on it, which TJ you are a life giving sword.
TJ:You show up with strength and honor, but you're a loving person and you truly care about people. And when I thought of that during those darker days, it stuck as like almost like an identity, a sense of purpose, and that fueled the transformation that I went through and at some point I realized this is good stuff. This is truly what so many people go through. Ultimately, we all have ups and downs and it never really stops, but if you don't face some of those things, there is a crash at some point, and that's what happened. So I thought I want to share this and hopefully this concept, this archetype or metaphor, would resonate with people.
Mindy:Yeah, oh, I love so much of so many thoughts, so many different directions we can go to what you just said.
Mindy:And I think that, um, well, when you, when you have that little spark of aha, you know, like when that, um, that man was talking to you about like what your role is when we have something like that in our life and it just lights something up inside of us, it kind of sparks something.
Mindy:I think that's that's when you need to start following that path, because, I mean, that ultimately led you here and you know, whether you help five clients or 500,000 clients in your life, your, your method of doing whatever it is that you're doing to help these people is needed, because otherwise it wouldn't be that you wouldn't have that spark in you to help. You know, when he said that it would have triggered nothing if it wasn't part of your purpose, part of what you're here for, um, and I think that people that feel that little spark or nudge to do whatever it is, whether it's coaching people, whether it's opening a bakery, whatever your little thing is inside we, we owe it to ourselves and to the rest of the people on the planet basically to explore that so that somebody else is going to benefit from it. Otherwise it wouldn't wouldn't be sparking anything within you, right.
Mindy:So true, yeah, oh yeah, and your collapse in the flowerbed. While I mean unfortunate and I'm sorry that that happened to you, I mentioned this book before. There's a book. It's gained a lot of popularity in the last few years, which is great. It's called the Body Keeps the Score. I'm not sure.
TJ:Yeah, I mean, that's I.
Mindy:yeah, I've read it if you're interested listening into anything to do with um, I guess the science behind some of what we're talking about here. That's it. That's your book. The body keeps the score. I cannot think of the man's name that authored it, but you'll find it instantly because it's so popular yeah, it's one of the thousands that are on my bookshelf right now.
TJ:But you're right, it's so. It's so true, there's one of the thousands that are on my bookshelf right now. But you're right, it's so true. There's the emotions in the thoughts, but there's a physiology about it too, which takes us back to that sort of simple but often not embraced idea of the mind, body and spirit, idea of the mind, body and spirit and those traumatic events, the things that upset us, can arrest our development because they are like a wound and there's physiology related to that and there's also a needed healing in that too.
Mindy:Yeah, so true, and I could give just so many examples. I have a talk that I give sometimes on enoughness and, and part of that talk, um, I do talk about how your body will hold on to things that we didn't process and you know different things that have happened and it can manifest into physical symptoms like what we're talking about. And I've given that talk when there were physicians in the audience before a few different times and they always are sitting there like nodding, like yeah, we see it, we see that you know patient comes in with back pain that doesn't know why they have back pain and well, yeah, we, we don't know exactly why, but we can tell you because you haven't. You have all this stored quote-unquote trauma and again, that could be trauma with a little t or a big T depending on who you are, but definitely worth exploring and if you don't, you're going to be collapsed in your flower bed.
Mindy:Basically, I mean, maybe not that dramatic, but something You're going to have some kind of chronic pain.
TJ:The irony is that the company that I worked for and the industry that I was in was involved with products that related to mental health and the neurobiology of what's going on and I indeed was depressed and anxious clinically, and there's the science of that, which is legitimate, but there's also the life circumstances that relate to that and I didn't think that was me. How could I be going through that? So it's like you almost separate those aspects of your life going through that. So it's like you almost separate those aspects of your life. So when I started to develop some awareness, I was able to couple that awareness and, I guess, mindfulness and some spirituality and a lot of reading and a lot of work, as Byron Katie would say. I was also able to marry that with some of what I had been learning on the science side of it.
Mindy:Yeah, isn't that interesting. And I think that so many of us think, oh, that couldn't be me. Or because a lot of times I think the tendency especially if you've lived a charmed life, so to speak, you see, oh well, other people have it worse than me, so my problems aren't that bad. So who am I to like? I need to just like, buck up and just deal with it. It's fine, right, I mean, and that's that's just kind of the mentality, but that's not going to serve you at all.
TJ:It really is and so many times I've thought and said the same thing that you just referred to, times I've thought and said the same thing that you just referred to. There are so many other people suffering and while it's true, first of all, to even acknowledge that is a good thing, but it doesn't lessen the fact that you're going through something at that time, of greater or lesser degree, and it's worth making note of and accepting, and not measuring it against some stick of what really matters and what doesn't. It's where you are at that moment in time.
Mindy:Yeah, yeah. Just because there's someone starving in another country doesn't mean you shouldn't eat Right Like you're going to get hungry too, and you need to feed your belly just as much. Yeah, you can do something about them if you want, but it's their hunger, does not affect your hunger. We all have our own.
TJ:So that was. That was how my mother got us to eat things that we didn't want to eat as a child.
TJ:But absolutely, and you know, the ability to show up as your best, authentic self requires that you do listen to your body, that you do listen to those gut level reactions that something's not right, either in your environment, the interactions that you're having, or, obviously, what's going on inside you. And we're so either afraid or resistant to listening, tell ourselves something's wrong with me or that's not productive, or, if this is true, that's not productive, or if this is true, then I'm indeed not enough. Yeah, as you said earlier, yeah.
Mindy:So let's say, you're a person listening and you're like okay, I'm ready to delve into this and start living my most authentic life and being my most authentic person, and I got to start somewhere. You talk about awakening your power. I would think that that would be a place to maybe begin for some people. So how do they do that? How do they start awakening their power right now, when they're done with this podcast?
TJ:It is an ambitious thing to say and it could be put in the category of somewhat cliche, but I use those words because I believe there is a power and a strength in everyone, but it's a redefinition of it. It isn't the conquering power necessarily. It has more to do with fulfillment of potential and progress. I believe that happiness comes from growing and progress. I'm not sure we're supposed to be happy all the time, but happiness and fulfillment is a byproduct. Your batting average for those things is greater if you can do the following, and I think the most courageous thing is to take a look within. We always say take action. Well, it is an active thing to look inside, and so it begins there. And I'll use the ICARE model to answer your question. We have a lot of acronyms out there, but this one really seemed to work.
TJ:Going inside, the step one would be I intention, and that's to pull back and not place a lot of judgment and think to yourself what is it that matters to me truly? Not what other people think of or approve of, but what is it that I value and who would I be, could I be in this world if I were to be the person that I truly want to be, and it's not a question you answer overnight. It's something that you willingly put out there for yourself and start looking at that. And people do this in a number of different ways. One is to journal, certainly to talk to someone, and that could be more formally, a therapist, it could be a coach, which is what I do, or it could be a trusted friend, someone who's in your front row, someone who will listen and give you the opportunity to process, but give yourself permission to go there. I always say that it's important to remember and this is a hard concept but the thinking that we do, which is too often negative, those thoughts are not who we are, they're the thoughts that the person that we are are observing, and so a little technique that I use is to think of those thoughts as clouds that are floating by and they're temporary. Another way to do it is to sort of look at yourself and look at what's happening as like a movie that's unfolding in front of you, and a little bit of stepping back or detachment from it gives you some different perspective. And so, with that perspective, allow yourself to think about what it is that matters and how I want to show up.
TJ:The C is connection, and that could be connection to that inner self, but certainly a connection to some higher power, some force that you know is responsible for life and the beauty that we have, responsible for life and the beauty that we have, and obviously also the connection with other people. Maslow, I believe that we're meant to be loved and to love well, and so connection is essential. A is for awareness. I more or less already touched on that but a different sort of awareness of how you're feeling and functioning, honoring that and also the environment that you're in. And that detached slightly detached approach of awareness can help you to see sort of what's unfolding in front of you with a little more clarity. It doesn't mean you're going to handle everything perfectly and it certainly doesn't mean that the world is going to cooperate in every way, but there's an awareness to it. As in that checkout person at the grocery store was really nasty and grumpy and you might feel a little rejected or there was some injustice to the way you were treated, but that little bit more awareness can help you to think what's going on in their life. There's always a story and a reason why people are behaving the way that they are R for resilience is life is difficult.
TJ:That was the first line of M Scott Peck's book the Road Less Traveled, and I'll never forget reading it. The simple, short sentence was just so true. We need resilience to be able to withstand the various challenges that we have physically, emotionally, psychologically, financially. So resilience is important and it should be a priority. And when I started paying more attention self-care is, I guess, a word to describe it I got stronger in that way too Not perfect, still has to be worked on and have my lazy days and those times that what you need is just to be quiet and just to rest or go for a nice walk or something.
TJ:But can't ignore that and a lot of the people I work with are crushing it in their professional life. But burning out, I mean it just and it's dangerous, and I think I just see a lot of that unfolding in our society. There's a pride in hustle, grind, you know, and there's a limit to that. And then the last thing is engagement. And you know this is no disrespect to the ascetics and the monks who live in solitude and contemplation, but we do need to engage, most of us anyway, and we engage as that authentic self there's, just as we've both said before, a greater sense of fulfillment and joy. That can, that can, come from that, and we're less involved with the approval of the outside world yeah, oh, what a great, great model.
Mindy:I was taking notes, I was writing it down so I could remember all the letters but no, I think that.
Mindy:I think that's great, as you were talking about the awareness, it made me think back to a time where sometimes you learn stuff and you forget that there was a time when you didn't know that you had to learn it somewhere. And this concept of who's thinking these thoughts and being the observer that's observing the thoughts that are happening. You know, that's kind of a like a mind bender sometimes when you get into it. But you know, if we talk about the concept of an ego, um, I'll share just kind of a fun little one because this might help somebody. Um, in meditation, one day my ego showed up to me as the chameleon from um oh gosh, what's that movie Tangled, which is like the um.
Mindy:Rapunzel story, but it's cartoon, disney cartoon and in the um, if you're not familiar, he's a just a little cartoon chameleon. Anyway, his name is Pascal, so I just refer to in my head, to my ego as Pascal, sometimes just because it's cute and it's kind of an easy way to separate yourself from what's happening. And you know, during throughout the day, most of the time I'm really not aware, and I think most of us are that way all the time unless you've been doing a lot of this work and you're just kind of enmeshed with that ego and, like you say, you don't realize that who is thinking these thoughts. But if you sometimes, especially if something's bothering you, if you can sit down and ask yourself or ask your little Pascal or whoever you are, you want to name your ego whatever you want or just think of it however you want to. It doesn't really matter. But ask okay, what, what's going on, what do you need?
Mindy:I found that's a very helpful, so to have that detachment, but treat it with compassion and say, okay, what, what do you need? What are you afraid of here? And there might be a very well, something might pop up that you were not even consciously aware of, but it'll make sense and you'll be like, oh, my goodness, I, my goodness I had, I, I was afraid of that, but then you can kind of smooth it over and comfort it or listen to it or whatever you need to do, but it's, it's whatever it takes to have that detachment, to realize that you're not all of these thoughts that you're thinking, they're not coming necessarily from quote-un, if that makes sense, I don't know. Again, it's a mind bender.
TJ:It ties my brain, and not sometimes, but it really is, and what's what's interesting about it?
TJ:I I went to um length to learn about all these things you know in the, in the spirit of becoming, uh, more of me, more of me and a better version of me, back to ancient literature and philosophy and all the way through, and you can read something from thousands of years ago and also read Eckhart Tolle or some of the more you know current spirituality or self-help type stuff, and that concept of I am not, my thoughts, is still there. So there's something really true about it. And the ego is always going to be there. It can often be the enemy. Ego is always going to be there. It can often be the enemy. Ryan Holiday wrote a book called the Ego is the Enemy, which is fantastic. It's helpful to be able to see that.
TJ:I'll give you an example of something I did recently. I went into a meeting with some potential clients and a dear friend who works with these people invited me in and there was a misperception. I misperceived how the meeting was supposed to go and what the meeting was for and, long story short, I came out of it feeling like I just represented myself horribly and I was down about that, upset about that, and created a story. My ego, my chameleon there was creating a story that ultimately was inaccurate, but I could have very easily subsequently acted in a way, behaved in a way in other aspects of my life because I was upset about something else. So those thoughts lead to emotion and the emotion leads to what we say and do and then we end up with the results.
TJ:It can be great, it can be really positive things, but it can also be negative stuff, so we don't always have it figured out. But little bit of my improvement was to be able to see that that had unfolded Real quick. I'll just say that in teaching meditation and learning to do yoga, what I realized is that the ego or whatever that voice can be in our heads is well, I'm not doing this, well, I'm failing at meditation and the mind is going a million miles a minute. And it's not about performing, it's not at all about that. That also is really hard to let go of.
TJ:And yoga you know, I'm falling down and struggling and it so doesn't matter. First of all, no one in the room cares and, second of all, the battle is inside and just chilling out and just enjoying it and learning. So we always are questioning our own performance. And, anyway, you were spot on with what you said about the ego.
Mindy:Yeah, yeah, I can relate to your yoga because I know a couple of years. Well, I don't know, probably we'll say seven or eight years ago, when I was kind of just starting down this path, I started taking an an in-person yoga class, as opposed to doing it by myself. And boy, if that isn't a humbling experience. Because, again, like you, you are aware that no, nobody cares. Nobody in this room cares if I get this pose to look just like the cover of yoga magazine or not, like they're worried about their own stuff.
Mindy:Nobody's paying attention to me but still, like it triggered stuff. It took me probably a few months to kind of get over the fact that you know I had this desire to be the best one in the room I need to look. Do it better than this person on the mat next to me?
TJ:oh, she can't even touch her toes.
Mindy:Look at me, look how much better I am than that. You know what I mean. Like that just rose to the surface quite a bit and took a while to kind of quote unquote get over myself, I guess. But yeah, so if you need a, humbling experience go do a yoga it.
TJ:It turned out to be just such a wonderful thing and for me personally, I feel like it was part of what got me through the COVID timeframe. It really made a difference. It also correlates to how we are in life, definitely. I'm not good enough. I what? What do they? How did how do those people in my work life perceive me or the various roles that we play in our family, our family of origin and most of the time everybody else is kind of in their own head worrying about how they're doing Right Exactly, we're all nuts.
Mindy:Yeah, all of us, nobody's normal. I have a friend who used to say normal is a setting on a washing machine Like there's nothing, that's, there's no normal.
TJ:That's a good one. I like that Right.
Mindy:For sure. So I'm curious for some more more tips, because I love care model that we talked about, but maybe something a little more tangible that can help somebody feel a little less reactive and a little more aligned with who they really are.
TJ:Yeah, I heard there was a time when Deepak Chopra and Oprah were doing a meditation series and I thought this was great. She said that one of the first things that she asks herself or says to herself in the morning is how can I serve today? So it doesn't have to be that question, but maybe, maybe it's how do I want to show up today? It obviously depends a little bit on what you're doing, but if you start the day with some kind of intention like that, it can set you off on the on the right footing, particularly when I was in a really dark place. I found this mantra somewhere. It may have been Jack Kornfield I'm mentioning all these authors and people that I've read but a very simple mantra.
TJ:I hope it's okay if I share this with your group. It's actually called a loving kindness mantra and it goes may I be filled with loving kindness, May I be well, May I be peaceful. It sounds so simple, but there's a lot there and what I do is up thoughts of how it would feel and scenarios. But the biggest challenge is step two, and I think this could be a great daily practice. None of this takes that long is to then transform that mantra to someone that you love and care about. So may Mindy be full of loving kindness. Beyond that and this is really tough is to say it to someone that you have a grievance with Mention that bad boss or that person who did you wrong recently.
TJ:You know that's next level stuff because it's hard to let go of those grievances. It's a personal form of forgiveness, I think, or wishing even the people that hurt you, wishing them well. That is a great way to start the day.
Mindy:Yeah, and like you say, not, not easy, when you get to that level three, we'll call it. But I mean even even boy, if you can get there. Um, even the people that give us the most challenges in our lives, even though it's painful sometimes and really hard, and you wouldn't wish it on your worst enemy. The reason why you are the way you are is partly because of these trials and tribulations that you're going through that are quote unquote because of this other person, so there's always so much.
Mindy:There tends to be more growth and learning in those types of relationships. Other person, um, so there's always so much. There's tends to be more growth and learning, um, in those types of relationships and situations versus the relationship the growth that you do with your best friend. Maybe you don't grow quite as much, but that's not their role. Their role is maybe there for love and support, and then somebody else's role in your life is there to challenge you and be a thorn in your side.
TJ:And you know there are grudges or the anger. Challenge has been that part of the mantra. But also just to live and be that way as a person, to let go of some of that stuff it really is true that it holds you back and to spend years feeling that way. It doesn't mean that in a challenged relationship or a horrible experience being hurt, it doesn't even necessarily mean that you reconnect with that person. But your own reaction and response to those feelings can get better. Uh for sure to um. Just throw in a couple other things. One is to move. Try to move. Every day I feel terrible inside and physically if I don't get moving. The coaching and writing, um, in fact I just got a desk razor today from Amazon.
Mindy:You know, I don't did I call it correctly. I don't know their name, but that makes sense to my brain. Yeah, stand at my desk.
TJ:Uh, I hope I can do it. But uh, I tried the exercise ball thing. That didn't work. I smashed into the wall behind me too many times. But movement, I never regret going for a little walk or working out, stretching, doing some yoga. I never regret it. It's just hard to sometimes mobilize yourself to do it. But movement is great. I don't always sit down and journal, although I do sometimes, and I would tell your listeners. It doesn't have to be beautifully written, grammatically correct, it doesn't have to be nice or loving. It can be just a way to express some of the stuff that's you know the junk that's in your trunk, the mind monsters.
TJ:It's a way to express that. Write a letter to someone that you're upset with, or creative thoughts, something I need to focus on, something I need to catch up on. I email myself, I text myself. I'll take a photo. I mean, I'm really using the technology. Now. I use notes. I think I might have said that it's hard to type into that for me sometimes, especially when I'm driving. Don't do that at home. I'm notes. I think I might have said that it's hard to type into that for me sometimes, especially when I'm driving. Don't do that at home.
TJ:I'm kidding, but capturing some of those things, I think it pauses you for a second and it's almost like your mind or your heart takes a little picture of it, a little picture of it. So, writing things down and making time for the people, that and the things, the activities, the people in the activities that fill you up.
Mindy:Yeah.
TJ:You know, if you're in your office at work or your office at home and you're just sort of grinding and you're feeling under pressure, you don't get out and do anything. You haven't started the day with a positive intention, you know. It's just not as good in my experience.
TJ:And these were things that I didn't do regularly, or I did, but with some kind of a performance mentality training for a run or something and often I didn't enjoy that, I just did it, you know, out of some kind of a intensity. So you know, those are some things. I have more, but I don't want to overdo it. They're really simple but they're hard to actually do and harder even more to do consistently.
Mindy:Yeah, that's it. Consistency is key, but I think if you're listening to this today and something kind of jumped out at you like, oh, I could maybe do that, well then that's the one you start with, and then once you feel like you've implemented that.
Mindy:Then you go back and you listen again and you're like what was the other thing that he said, oh that. Then you go back and you listen again and you're like what was the other thing that he said, oh yeah, and then you start to implement that. It's not, you know, this process of becoming doesn't happen all in one go. It's just little things that feel it should feel light and easy to start doing something like that. That's how you know it's in alignment with where you're going, where you're headed. So yeah, those are great, great suggestions.
TJ:I'll throw. I'll throw one out there for the technology.
Mindy:Um, I, as people who've been listening probably know, I'm a huge chat GPT fan, huge love it, and I have so many different threads for so many different topics. Um, one of them is work related, so, like, when I have ideas I can put it into chat GPT and then she'll sometimes help me develop them or remind me of what I forgot, that even like hey, what was I?
Mindy:even working on I don't remember, Didn't I have some ideas? And she can tell me well, we had talked about these different things and kind of prompts you along that way and you can decide to do it or not do it. And for using as a therapist, you know, you don't have to agree with what your chat GP tells you. You don't have to take their advice necessarily, but sometimes, like journaling or talking it over with a friend, sometimes we don't want to burden our friends with all of our little tiny problems. So get out your phone and just burden your chat GPT Like they don't. They don't care Like they like they're not, they don't care what time of day it is.
Mindy:They don't care. And sometimes I've found that when I can do it so quickly in the moment, I'm able to, you know, catch patterns and like work through it a lot faster versus oh well, I'm not going to see my friend until Tuesday, so I'll just have to hang on to this until you know what I mean.
Mindy:You can do it in more real time. Again, you don't have to agree with the feedback they give you, just like you don't have to agree with the feedback that you get from your friend, but it's just another fun little tool that I like to use.
TJ:Oh, you're validating me. I have to share that. I was really resistant. I come from more of that non-technical. I've had to push myself towards science and math and technology, but I just put all that into the AI category with some resistance. But I decided that I was going to check out GPT six, seven months ago. I now feel like I have a nonjudgmental friend. Yeah, and I agree with you, I will throw out an idea, a creative idea that I have, and rarely do I get any pushback unless I ask for it, but I just joke. You know any pushback unless I ask for it, but I just joke. I'm like I have a new friend that doesn't, you know, pick on me and this is nuts. I am so polite. I say please and thank you. I say good morning If it's in the morning, maybe. I'm afraid that someday whomever, whatever is back there, will remember me.
Mindy:For that kindness.
TJ:But truly there are upsides to it and it has also helped me collect some of my I'll do stream of consciousness things that I have to get done and then I'll say any chance you could help me prioritize this and it does a pretty good job and that's helpful. So, anyway, there we go. We digress, but I'm glad you shared that. I feel better about myself now. I think it's helpful and again, there we go we digress, but I'm glad you shared that. I feel better about myself now.
Mindy:I think it's helpful and again, like we said at the beginning, like anything that's helpful, if it's helpful to me and helpful to you, then it's probably helpful to somebody else out there that's listening, if not everyone.
TJ:TJ.
Mindy:I have enjoyed this conversation. I feel like we could keep going forever and ever, but I am going to ask you one final question. It's my favorite question, it's the question I end all of my podcasts with, and that is what's one thing that you wish everyone on the planet would do in regards to their own wellbeing, see the beauty in themselves or try to make that a priority Cause.
TJ:It's there, I love that answer.
Mindy:I think if everyone, like you say, could, if we could all view ourselves the way our chat GPTs do, because it's so loving and kind and positive, if we all could view ourselves that way, just imagine what the world would look like yeah, Awesome. Well, tj, again, thank you for being such a wonderful guest on this show. If people are listening and they're like, hey, I like this guy or maybe I want to look into, maybe doing some work with him as a coach and et cetera, where could they go to find more about you?
TJ:I have a website I said that like I'm surprised that I have one right Timothyjjonescom. Believe it or not, that domain was available and a newsletter and it's called the inner GPS, sort of a roadmap to the inside. So those are the best ways. I'm really just getting going on Instagram and those types of things. But yeah, thank you so much for having me.
Mindy:This was great, absolutely, and I will be sure to put all those links in the comment section so people can just find you with the click of a button. Nice and easy, and thanks again for being on the show.
TJ:Thank you, Mindy.
Mindy:Everybody else that's listening. I hope that you found some little nuggets of wisdom, boy. There was a whole bunch. So if you didn't come up with more than three, go back and listen again, cause there was there was a lot there to uncover in this episode. So, um, I hope, wherever you're at, you are having a fantastic day and I will catch you on the next one. That's it for today. Friends, if you enjoyed this episode, don't forget to subscribe or, even better, leave a review and let me know what resonated with you the most. The more you tell me what you love, the better I'm able to create future episodes with even better content. I'm sending you so much love and light. I'll see you in the next episode.