If You Keep Falling Off the Wagon, This is Why...

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Today's episode is taken from a live call inside of my signature program, The Bombshell Blueprint. If you want to know more about the blueprint or how once you get your little myths on it, you can finally stop sabotaging your progress and start losing weight, just head on over to KyliePax.com forward slash blueprint or hit the link in the show notes. So if we're talking about the power of tiny deceptions, my dad and I were shopping the other day, we're shopping at the good guys.

He was telling me about, you know, the importance of, how it's so important to keep the house clean and looking beautiful and all these things. I said, yeah, and of course I agree. I was raised in his household.

I'm his daughter. I, that is me. I am all anal about cleanliness, organization and all these things, probably mainly because I'm a Virgo.

And he has a little female friend now who is the opposite of him. My dad is like, as I say, like fastidious about this glasses has to be here and everything has to be perfect and clean, clean, hospital grade, clean all the time. He has to be on top of his chores.

He doesn't let things lapse. And she is the opposite. She's like, we, I don't know what, I don't even know what starts on my dad is.

I don't know what starts on this woman is, but they would be complete opposites. She's like off having fun, party this, visit people there. Like she's out all day, every day doing things, going to exhibitions, visiting people, catching up.

Everything is a reason to party. She said, do you want to go here today? We'll do this. And he said, I cannot today.

I have all these chores that I have to get through at home, in the garden, within the house. And she said to him, why do you have to, why do you do that? Like why? And he said, because it's about with, it's about holding your standards. He said, you only have to drop your standards by 1% per week.

And over the course of a year, you're down 50%. And over the course of two years, you are down 100%, completely unrecognisable. Your life is completely unrecognisable, all because of tiny little compromises.

And I, I looked at what he said, and he just went on, you know, about whatever he was saying. I'm just like, Oh my God, I don't want to hold everything. That's crazy.

I've never really thought about that before. That's exactly what we do with food. We compromise, we make a little adjustment here.

It doesn't matter. It's just one more time. It's only one chocolate bar.

And you know, even though I said that I wouldn't, and blah, tiny, weedy, 1% compromises each week have got you to where you are now, to the place where your life, your body is fucking completely unrecognizable. You're like, this is not where I was supposed to be. This is not how it was supposed to be for me.

When I was a little kid, is this exactly how I dreamed I would be in this body, still struggling with weight? Tiny little compromises have got you to where you are now. That is how sneaky and deceptive our thoughts and these compromises can be. It's these tiny little deceptions, the ones where you think this is not impactful.

(3:07 - 3:12)

How on earth can it be? It's just a cup. It's just a block of chocolate. It's not impactful.

(3:12 - 6:13)

It's not going to change my life or my weight, really, not dramatically. It's just tonight. It's just one more time.

And yet here you are, years later down the track, still deceiving yourself in tiny little ways. It doesn't matter. It's just one more time.

I'll start again tomorrow. It doesn't hurt anybody. It's just me.

Who's going to know? Tiny little deceptions have got you to where you are now. So today we're going to be diving into some of these most powerful deceptions and the impacts that they have on our lives and how these tiny little incremental changes can shape your standards for yourself. Standards.

Remember what my dad said, you only have to drop your standards by 1% per week. Look, Malcolm's giving us a whole masterclass today. I will tell him, he'll be very proud.

You only have to drop your standards by 1% per week. And over the course of a year, you've gone from being, look at me up here, withholding my dietary standards, following the eating codes, taking care of myself, keeping the house clean, walking every day, acting like my body matters, you know, doing some self-care. You've gone from up here to down here.

Well, you know, I used to shave my legs or I used to, you know, get a wax or I used to wash my hair all the time. And now I'm just curly like now you're down here. One more year of that shit.

And you are down here. Rock bottom, rock bottom. Wondering how you ever got there.

And even worse, getting way back up here seems so so hard. And you know what, honey, to be really honest, it is hard. By the time you're all the way down here, which really took no time at all to get there.

By the time you are down here. Yeah, it is hard. It is going to be hard work to get back up here, which is why it would behoove us not to allow that to happen to start with.

But that's just not human nature, is it? We are always wanting the easy way out. We're wired for the easy way out. We love the easy way out.

But easy often leads to hard in the end, whereas hard leads to easy in the end. If you'd done the hard thing early on and said no and kept your standards and held your boundaries, your life would be so easy right now. Oh, so easy.

You'd be wearing anything you want, going anywhere you want, traveling in the way that you want, feeling the way that you want to feel. It would be bliss. But here we are.

Here we are. Of course, the good part is, as one of my private clients pointed out to me yesterday, we were talking about this. And she said, well, if that's down 100 percent over two years, she said, then we only have to raise our standards by 2 percent per week for a 12-month comeback like nobody's ever seen.

(6:13 - 9:04)

So let's start today by talking about the danger of the first deception that we tell ourselves, which is, oh, one more won't hurt. It's just one more. It's just a little bit.

It's just one more time. It's only just today. It's just one more night.

What harm can it do? These are the tiny deceptions that are often most frequently disguised and seem so harmless and benign to us. But when you repeat them night after night after night, you erode your self-discipline. Erode.

Can we really think about that word erosion? Gone. Gone. And erosion doesn't happen quickly.

A beach situation is what's coming to my mind, like a sandy beach, a sand hill or something. That's eroded over time by the wind. You don't wake up one morning and the beach hill or the sand hill is there and then it's gone the next.

Erosion doesn't happen that quickly, not generally. Erosion is slow, slow, so tiny, so imperceptible, you can't even see it happening at the time. But you wake up one day after six months, eight months, 12 months, you think, didn't there used to be, wasn't that hill bigger? Didn't there used to be a bigger sand hill there? Yeah, they did.

But it was eroded slowly, slowly over time. And that's what you're doing to your self-image, your self-concept when you are making these tiny little compromises over time. They erode at your potential, who you could be, who you were put here to be.

It sends the message to your brain that you're not really, not really serious about your goals. I mean, you want them, would be nice. You won't reject them if you woke up tomorrow with them, but you're not really serious enough to go after them, not really.

So by slowly lowering your standards, it makes it consistently harder for your brain to believe in, picture, care enough about moving towards your future self. That's why it's so hard for you. It's not hard, you're not having a hard time picturing her because you don't have an imagination.

You're having a hard time picturing her because you have deceived yourself for so long and eroded at your self-image and your self-concept and your self-belief for so long that it's hard for your brain now to get an idea of even what it is that you want because you've never taken it seriously. So the first part is the gravity that those tiny little deceptions hold. Just one more, just one more time, doesn't really matter.

(9:04 - 9:53)

It's only a little bit. The best example that I ever heard was Joyce Meyer and she gave a story, she told the story one time of, it was made up about say a father that made some chocolate brownies for his children and he made these chocolate brownies and then he brought them into the children, said, do you want a chocolate brownie? And they were all really excited. Yeah, yeah, yeah, we want a chocolate brownie.

And he said, these are amazing. I added a special secret ingredient. And they said, oh, what's the secret ingredient? It's just a tiny little bit of dog poop, tiny, just the tiniest little bit of dog shit.

She didn't say shit. The tiniest little bit of dog shit, just, you won't even know that it's there, but it makes them super, super delicious. And the children went from like, give them to me to, ew, ew, gross.

(9:53 - 11:10)

She was demonstrating the impact that these tiny weeny little compromises have on our lives. It can take something that could have been delicious to something that you wouldn't even want to touch. And that is my second point, which is the slippery slope of these small little deceptions.

The small, tiny little compromises and lies that we tell ourselves because a seemingly insignificant compromise, like we all do this, like I deserve this treat. I've had such a hard day. Oh my God, today was crazy.

It was crazy. I deserve this. That may seem really innocent, but just like we talked about with the erosion, this, which is taking something away, this builds up over time.

It makes it easier and easier for you to justify your next big compromise, your next bigger deception and start distancing yourself even further from the person that you want to be. Thank you so much for tuning in. Remember to shimmy your butt over the Kylie Pax.com and join me inside of the bombshell blueprint so you can stop emotional eating and start losing your way now.

You'll also find helpful notes and resources inside my past podcast that will help you lose your way without losing your sanity. I will see you next week.