Marital Conflict is Inevitable. But Marital Combat is Optional.
The key to any fight is to maintain control. No, not of the other person. Control of yourself. You do not have the right to be immature, childish, or abusive. On the other hand, if you have legitimate feelings and issues, you are absolutely entitled to give a reasonable voice to those feelings in a constructive way. (That includes not being self-righteous or taking yourself too seriously.)
Here are 10 things you can do to Reduce Stress and Conflict in Your Marriage.
1. Make it private and keep it private.
2. Deal with the issue at hand.
3. Stay in the room emotionally. Never allow it to get physical!
4. Eliminate “You never” and “You always.”
5. Avoid character assassination like the plague.
6. Avoid “mind reading.”
7. Stay on task.
8. Be proportional in your intensity.
9. Commit yourself to openness, honesty, and acceptance.
10. Allow yourself and your partner to retreat and/or regroup with dignity.
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