125. My 'glow up' in 5 steps

In this podcast, I'm sharing the five BIG things that led to my "glow up" from 2019 to today in 2025. I learned a lot about what it really takes to transform, and these aren't your surface-level beauty tips. Enjoy!

Jenna Hamm: Nervous System resource: https://www.jennahamm.com/

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DIGITAL RESOURCES!⤵️

FREE training: 4 Steps to Stop Obsessing About Food: https://bit.ly/FFEmasterclass

$11 TRAINING: How I stopped my non-stop Overeating (while keeping my favorite foods in the house): https://jessiegolden.thrivecart.com/overeating-training/ 

$27 TRAINING: Maintenance Masterclass: learn whether or not you're really under-eating & how to prepare your metabolism for sustainable fat loss! https://jessiegolden.thrivecart.com/maintenance-masterclass/ 

COURSES:

Food Freedom Evolution: finally get off the yo-yo dieting & food obsession hamster wheel. https://bit.ly/ffeYT 

Sustainably Lean Academy: get lean while keeping your sanity (+ love of food!) and KEEP IT OFF - no tracking required! https://bit.ly/SLAcourseYT 

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Transcript

[00:00:00] Welcome back to another video if you are watching on YouTube, or welcome to another podcast episode if that is where you're watching. You are watching today we are talking about my glow up. Up in five steps and these steps will be a little bit different than you're likely expecting. Are some of them more surface level?

Superficial? Sure. But really the glow up I experienced, and this was coming from my health crisis in 2019, where really I feel like my body, SHIT, the bed, I am spelling that out because on YouTube I'll probably get flagged and this video will not be allowed up. I don't really know the rules there, but. My body broke down, my energy broke down.

Who I once knew myself to be was just no longer there. And that was both good and bad, but I needed to rebuild. And since then, yes, do I look different, but I feel so different. And that's truly the essence of a glow of, anyway, it starts from the inside and then is reflected on the outside. So let's get into it.

Number one, and probably most [00:01:00] importantly was nervous system regulation. I didn't realize how dysregulated my nervous system was on a day to day basis until I had my health crisis. And this was a slow building. There were signs over the previous, I would say year that I ignored. I was diagnosed with Hashimoto's, which is an autoimmune disease of the thyroid in 2018.

And I started to feel those feelings of, okay, I can't really get through workouts. Like I used to, I was doing a lot of CrossFit at the time, really intense brain fog, really low energy, just did not feel good. And I thought I was out of the woods. Once I took a couple of months off, felt better in 2018. And then 2019 rolled around the beginning of the year and things got a million times worse.

It was like, Oh, you're not going to listen to us the first time we're going to make sure you really pay attention this time. But I was so frantic. I still had lacked so much trust in my body and I didn't understand what was happening, which is very normal for your brain to panic for you to panic when you can't be told what's happening with your body.

And all my labs came back normal, but I just felt [00:02:00] off of my digestion. My bloating was insane to the point where I could not sleep. I was struggling with insomnia. I was having really bad blood sugar dips where I would have insomnia and be able to only be able to sleep for about two to three hours a night for sometimes weeks.

It was awful. And then I, when I would fall asleep, I would wake up. Sweating with my heart racing because my blood sugar was just on a roller coaster and then I'd wake up really nauseous. I was very confused by my body's signals. I couldn't make it longer than 20 minutes on a walk. These were all things that were reflected on the outside.

And the more I panicked, the worse things got for me in terms of my health and my energy. I just had no life force within me. So what I focused on was nervous system regulation.

Now, truth be told, I didn't even know that this was what I was doing at the time, but since then, over the last, I would say three years, I've really focused on it. And anytime I feel myself starting to dip into more of that burnout y feeling, or I feel like I'm more on the anxious side of things, that's my sign that my nervous system is not [00:03:00] It's chronically dysregulated and Jenna Hamm was really helpful for me. She has a membership. You can find her in the notes below, whether you're in the podcast or I will link her Instagram profile so you can go ahead and find her, but her membership is absolutely wonderful. But prior to finding her.

But I realized, and it came to me in a moment when I was getting a massage in the crux of my health issues in 2019, where I realized, Oh, my body doesn't feel safe. And somehow instinctually I knew that focusing on longer exhales was going to be a signal to my body that all is well, and that's essentially what I focused on is how can I send the signal to my body that we're okay.

But there's not a tiger looking around the corner because I'm moving a thousand miles an hour every second. That was how I was living my life. High intensity exercise all the time. I was working my full time job and then I was building this business on the side and I was constantly going, going, going.

And it felt like an addiction that if I slowed down that I would eventually feel how awful I felt. Plus I was just driven by society's values of productivity. So [00:04:00] all that to say, regulating my nerve system, which was using the exercises later on via Jenna Ham, that was really helpful. And if you are just wanting some tips, some things that really helped me was focusing on my exhales being longer than my inhales, but also just paying attention to my surroundings.

I was chronically in my head and I wasn't paying attention to. the things around me, the people around me. I wasn't paying attention to the trees and nature. Like I once was, everything was a product of thinking. So my recommendation would be to, and this can take some time, especially if it feels uncomfortable for your brain being still is to just start paying attention to your external surroundings, but then also getting in touch with your body and being in touch with my body is something I worked on years ago.

Because of my relationship with food so that comes a little bit more naturally to me now But if you are not that way then learning to get in touch with the sensations in your body with your emotions Will allow your brain to register that okay It's safe to be in the present moment and that's ultimately what we want our bodies and our brains to [00:05:00] feel so I cannot I truly cannot Overstate the importance of this enough

The second part to my glow up was honing my personal style. So I was living in New York city. 2021 and that's what I really started to feel better in a lot of ways I had a lot of anxiety during that time again nervous system related from so much stimulation around me in that city I realized that was not the lifestyle for me.

But nonetheless I started to feel like myself again that year I felt better and better and I started to realize that after living in Colorado for the previous Gosh, 10 ish plus years that I had taken on a style that was not my own. I love Colorado, but the typical Colorado style is just not me. I have more of a classic style.

I like a tailored style, typically. I like things that are more of a capsule wardrobe, high quality that fit really well and have basics, really solid basics, but then I have more fun with accessories and have a little bit of flair here and there with makeup or hair or whatever. And I also went back to a more natural hair color.

I had really dark [00:06:00] hair for a couple years. And in looking back, it just, it didn't suit me and it also wasn't true to me. I didn't look in the mirror and looking back in those photos now, who is that girl? So really honing into what style evokes my true essence and felt authentic and genuine to me was, might sound superficial, but it made a really big difference in me coming back home to myself and feeling like myself again.

And I just look better to be quite frank.

The third thing I did to glow up was focus on my life outside of work and my health because I didn't understand what was happening to my body in the years prior. That became such a hyper fixation. And of course, the more I focused on it, the worst things got. I had to fully surrender and trust my body.

But I'd become so focused on my health and controlling that. And for years prior, back when I had a negative relationship with food, it was coming from a different place, but still that hyper fixation that control. So you might notice some parallels there, but I was so focused on being productive on work.

And there was an element of this looking back where did I have to work really hard because I was working a full time job while trying [00:07:00] to build this business on the side, not trying. I did that. That was necessary, but the energy with which I approached it could have been vastly different. I also could have made a lot more time for things outside of work.

I got back in touch with pleasure, just doing things for fun. I couldn't remember the last time I had read a book just for fun. I was so focused on personal development and learning about business and making sure that I was up to date for what I was teaching, right? Relationship with food, health, that I neglected that I am a human being who has needs beyond just being productive.

And beyond just chasing goals. So I got back in touch with who am I? What do I enjoy in life? Do I have hobbies? Do I want hobbies? That's like the most stressful question ever, isn't it? What are your hobbies? Luckily, my job now is a hobby of mine because I love it so much, but I digress finding out who we are beyond just what society tells us to value is so.

Important. And yes, do we have to go to jobs that we don't like? Sometimes 100 percent I did that for a very long time. And you [00:08:00] might find, okay, well, I don't have the luxury of having a job that I enjoy. Many people don't, but are there ways that a, you can shift your attitude and your energy around with that and approach it with more ease and gratitude for maybe it giving you paycheck.

And can you find more fulfillment outside of work? When I went to Bali after I left New York City, so this was in 2022, I really started to shift my focus to me being my own muse. I'd gone through a period after being online and having an online business that I felt like I had to be like everybody else in order to be successful.

And I really started to tune back into me. What do I enjoy? I was surrounded by hardcore fitness culture in Bali and I realized that is not who I am. I thought that I was that because again, that's what society was valuing, but that is not me. So coming back into yourself and starting to value things just for fun and pleasure, not trying to achieve an end goal, it gives us life force again.

And that ties into the next tip I'm going to cover.

The fourth tip is getting back [00:09:00] into my feminine energy. And I know that this topic can be inflammatory to some people. And if it doesn't jive with you, then I would just suggest keeping an open mind and maybe using a different term or just focusing on the energy. Of what I'm trying to say. I'm not trying to be disparaging in any way, shape, or form.

But for me, it was actually really helpful to reclaim that title and that energy. Because I grew up in an era, I'm a millennial, that I grew up thinking that being a girly girl, quote unquote, and this is a stereotype of course, but that was true to me. That's who I naturally was when I was a young girl before anyone told me what to be.

That felt so true to me and it wasn't until I got into school and was influenced by other people that I felt ashamed because it wasn't cool to be a girly girl. The way to be accepted and the way to get boys to like you was to be a tomboy. And I grew up with brothers, right? And it was, oh, you're being such a girl, as if it was a negative thing.

And society was starting to value women hustling, being the boss, babe, being super athletes. And all of these things are so incredible. And [00:10:00] for many women, that is so true to them. But when I really got connected with myself and said, who am I? What do I value? What feels true to me? Do I love to crush it at work?

Yes. Do I love athleticism in a lot of ways? Yes. But I realized not nearly as much as I thought that was something I thought would lead to me being approved of. But getting back into this feminine essence of trust and surrender and accepting help, receiving, allowing people to do things for you, taking a step back and letting things come to you rather than always being in pursuit, rather than always having a goal and focusing on achieving, hunting and going.

That was so effing draining to me, I cannot tell you, and I didn't know that I had, I lost so much touch with myself that I didn't even know that that was still a part of me. And once I realized and then accepted that that was a big part of my authentic self, and it might not be for you and that's wonderful, but for me, I had to really reclaim that that is when I felt my most at ease.

My most relaxed, focusing on pleasure, sitting back and [00:11:00] allowing and trusting. And does that mean that I don't work hard? Not at all. I work really hard and I also take a step back and I allow things to happen for me. I allow people to step in. Right. I allow for help. I make time for pleasure and I romanticize my life.

Now I romanticize my wellness, taking care of myself. I romanticized losing 30 pounds throughout the process. I refuse to do it in a very rigid and data heavy and just all we care about is the goal of food is purely function type of way. I didn't want to live that way because I realized it was not true to me.

So allowing my feminine energy to come back online and claiming it as something not to be ashamed of. But something to actually own allowed my energy, my health, everything to blossom and it showed on the outside. My health improved. This facilitated my nervous system regulation. I was more in tune with my body.

I was more in tune with the type of exercise that I wanted to be doing. I realized that doing high intensity CrossFit style exercise doesn't make me feel good and I really don't even enjoy it. I was just doing it because I thought that was the cool thing, the thing that would [00:12:00] make me approved of, and that was all subconscious.

I wouldn't have been able to tell you that a couple years ago. But I enjoy movement that allows me to be more connected to myself. I enjoy dabbling in some Matt Pilates. I enjoy yoga. I enjoy weightlifting, where I'm connected to my body. It's slow, it's methodical. Not trying to snatch over my head with really heavy weight a hundred times in a row during a workout.

No

and a final component that was really important when it came to reclaiming my feminine is reclaiming emotions. And I had done so much work on that prior when it came to my relationship with food, but I still didn't recognize how much deeper had to go. And allowing myself to feel upset, to feel disappointed.

For some reason that was such a scary one for me to feel angry, right? Women are shamed if they feel angry. And I said, I'm going to feel angry because I'm a human being. I'm going to feel sad and scared and I'm going to feel all the things and allow myself to be a human being and to not be ashamed of it.

And the emotional part of life is such a beautiful part of the feminine. And of course [00:13:00] everyone has. Emotions and every single person has masculine and feminine, but that more fluid allowing of emotions to come through rather than building up a dam and blocking it, that takes a huge toll if you're feeling your feelings off of your nervous system in your physical body, but if you're not, it stops everything up and it sends that signal of danger versus that signal of safety.

The fifth thing that led to my glow up is pursuing things I actually value. And this led to, well, not being in alignment with this led to a nervous breakdown. in New York city, when I was leaving, I had just turned 33, it was about to, and I realized had this epiphany of, oh my gosh, I've been chasing all of these dangling carrots of this amount of money every month in my business and this following in my business.

And then once I get the guy, then everything's going to be complete. Then everything's going to feel good once I achieve all these milestones. And then I had this realization that, but then I have to sustain all these things. It's not about finding the guides being in a relationship that I actually want to be in [00:14:00] long term It's not about having these high income months and there's revenue goals in my business It's have I built a business that I actually want to sustain long term that I'm excited about that doesn't make my soul ache because I've Created this monster that I feel like I'm on a hamster wheel just trying to sustain and for you That might be you're chasing these body goals.

We're realizing Oh my gosh, I'm pursuing these goals in a way that feels so awful to me, where I'm being really rigid, or I'm trying to eat all these foods that I hate, or removing all the foods that I love, or I'm just rushing the process. Whatever that feels like to you, where it gives you that feeling of ick, maybe it's time to pause and say, what am I ultimately after?

Am I ultimately after a feeling? And are these even my values to begin with? Do you really want to lose the weight and look the way you want to? Maybe, maybe not. Do you really want to build all that muscle or is that something you feel like you just have to do right now because it's popular in social media?

Do you want to get that promotion even though it's going to take away a lot of your free time or time with your family and it's going to add a ton of stress? You get to decide. Are you chasing a relationship with a guy [00:15:00] for validation or is that true for you? is that man or woman right for you?

Or do you just want to say, I got somebody, or I won the person, the guy who's not giving me any attention because that brings me validation and I can show it off to my friends, whatever that looks like. So really coming back into myself and saying, what do I value? And I realized the most important thing I value is how life feels to me.

It's not about the end result. It's the process. Am I living in integrity with myself? Am I doing work that I'm really proud of? Do I have financial goals? 100 percent but none of that means anything. If it's a business I want to burn down at the end of the day anyway, because I feel so out of integrity with it or because I'm so focused on the end goal that I'm sacrificing my health and relationships in order to get there.

And those two things matter more to me than reaching new heights in my business. So this work. And answering these questions might seem like, oh, this is so boring, but it makes the world of a difference when it comes to how it is reflected on the outside. Because when I really committed to asking myself these difficult [00:16:00] questions and realizing, crap, I have some realignment to do.

I need to change some things up. And there was some grief associated with that, but I came alive again. I felt such a weight off my shoulders of taking that pressure off of chasing things that I didn't even want in the first place. I just thought that I had to want them. And I thought that on a subconscious level, that that would lead to approval.

So there you have it five tips to me having a glow up my glow up from 2019 to present day and really feeling more like myself than I ever have except for when I was a kid. I think that's when we are the most authentic. Will there be more layers to shed? I absolutely plan on that being the case.

So hopefully the glow up just continues from here. But I hope these tips are really helpful for you. Of course, do we have plenty of beauty glow up tips that we can focus on if you'd like a video on more of the minutiae of things I changed for my actual physical appearance, things I did differently. I would love to create that.

Just let me know in the comments, if you're on YouTube, let me know in the comments. And if you're listening to this on the podcast, then just hop on over to [00:17:00] Instagram and pop me a note in my DMS. 

And if you would like help with your relationship with food, getting leaner in a way that feels relaxing and nourishing and you're romanticizing the process, but I call soft life fat loss, whatever stage of the journey you are in.

I have plenty of resources that you can find linked in the notes below, regardless of whether you are watching or you are listening and I will see you in the next one.