127. 10 habits of naturally thin women

In this podcast, I'm sharing four common elements/habits/ways of thinking of women who get what they want in life, including my pet peeve saying I hear really often that usually tells me someone WON'T get what they want in life. I'm sharing what I would tell my younger self ❤️ Let me know what landed most for you in the comments!

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Transcript

[00:00:00] Welcome back to my YouTube channel. Guys, if you are watching and if you are listening on the podcast, welcome back as well. Today's topic might be a little bit controversial, but we're gonna lean into it. It is the 10 habits that I have noticed of women who are naturally slim, and I'm putting that in quotations because this doesn't mean that they aren't aware of their habits, and I.

grew up, I mean, essentially I was still a child at the time in my teens, early twenties. I felt like a child when I was really struggling with my relationship with food. I would look at women who were naturally slim. Some of them did. They have sketchy mindsets with food 100%, but for the women who were just relaxed, more effortless about it, I thought that that was just purely genetics that I got the short end of the stick.

That there was something wrong with me, I would never be able to achieve that way of interacting with food. that's simply not true. There are some mindsets, some habits that these women, and I would like to think that I'm one of these women now, but these women embody and employ Deploy. So let's go ahead and work through these.

And I do wanna acknowledge that. Are [00:01:00] there genetic differences? Yes. Genetics, load the gun, other things pull the trigger, and we can all work within the confines of what we have been given. But I just want you to have an open mind with this and consider maybe there are some ways of interacting with food belief systems, thoughts, behaviors that I can try on, and that would lead to having more of that effortless.

Relaxing relationship with food, but also your physique. So let's go ahead and dive in. And another caveat here is I'm not talking about women who are super into fitness. They're not tracking wing and measuring all their food and fitness isn't a huge passion and hobby of theirs. Those women would fall into a different category because they are very detail oriented, data driven.

Everything is really dialed in. Right. They're tracking their food. Everything is numbers to make sure that they have the physique that they want. I'm talking about women who, yes, take care of themselves. They prioritize wellness, and they have the physique that they want in a more effortless way. So let's get into it.

Number one is they practice portion control without [00:02:00] restricting. So they don't have all of these food rules about no sugar, no carbs, no processed foods, no whatever. It is restricting, and this is common with those who are fad dieters. Like I was for a very, very long time, for nearly nine years, where I was gaining more and more weight over time, the more rules I had, the more foods I was restricting.

The heavier I became. But what I notice with these women is they interact with these foods in a very relaxed way, and typically they've never gone through a period of feeling like, I can't have this. I'm not allowed to. They just have these things in moderation, in smaller portions. When it actually contributes to their wellbeing, to the experience, it aligns with their values, right?

They're not one to walk by the. Stale off his cookies and say, oh my gosh, I need this 'cause I'm not gonna have it. They would look at that and be like, that is not at all appealing to me. If I'm gonna have a cookie, it's gonna be a really damn good cookie, one that is made from scratch or from my favorite bakery.

I'm really in the mood for it. I'm gonna sit down and be able to enjoy it mindfully. They don't have this restrictive scarcity mindset with food. They practice portion [00:03:00] control without restricting.

Number two is these women tend to move quite often. Their physical activity is higher, and I'm not talking about traditional exercise where they're going to gym classes five, six days a week, seven days a week doing two Aday. They are more relaxed about it, but they do prioritize physical activity. That is the general.

Through line. So going for more walks. Maybe they go on hikes, maybe they're doing their yoga and Pilates and going to weightlifting classes, but they have a general balanced approach about it and understand that moving more. On average is going to be beneficial. But these women I notice also are not the ones who are, oh my God, I need to get 20 K steps in a day.

And looking at their smart watches and then walking in circles in order to, to reach a certain number of steps per day. Everything is more relaxed, but in general, they are prioritizing movement throughout their days, and this is just lifestyle, the way that they live their lives.

Number three, and this is something that I notice. I'm not saying any of these things are right and are wrong or good, no bad is they [00:04:00] often are skipping breakfast or having something smaller. And this runs contrary to what a lot of people will say about breakfast. So this is more of a correlative effect, not causative, right?

I'm not saying skipping breakfast makes you slim, it's just that I notice that women, especially as they tend to get older, they don't have. That huge appetite in the morning, and these women I notice also might be more social in the evenings, going out to eat, having a glass of wine, dessert, whatever it is, so nothing extreme here.

They just tend to balance things a little bit more by eating a little bit lighter during the day and then eating a little bit heavier in the evenings. Again, not saying you should do this, that it's right nor wrong. I personally like to have something small, right when I wake up with my coffee. Something sweet typically, then I'm not hungry for a couple hours later, and then I have my actual breakfast.

Some people need to have a full breakfast right when they wake up. Others, they don't get hungry until 10, 11 or even lunchtime. There are a million ways to eat. I'm not saying [00:05:00] any is right nor wrong. This is just something I've observed and that I've noticed.

Number four. The fourth habit shift that I've noticed of women who are naturally slim is they just don't make food a huge part of their life. They enjoy food. They quote unquote indulge. They like to go out to eat, try things, but it is not a mainstay of their life. They're not super passionate about.

Health and fitness and nutrition. They don't know the ins and outs of carbs, fats, protein, macros. They just have a more practical view of life, but their priority in life is living life outside of food. It is not focused on food all the time. So they generally approach meals, and this includes exercise and fitness.

These tend to coincide with one another with a more gentle mindset, with a more practical mindset. Like I mentioned, they just generally are more relaxed about it because they're focused on fulfillment outside of food, fulfillment, outside of their physiques, outside of their bodies. Therefore, without all that pressure on food, it's just food.

They enjoy it, but that makes [00:06:00] them happy. But so does seeing their friends. So does creating something. So does reading a book. So does staring up at the sky. So does the sunshine, their puppy. There are a million other things that bring that sense of fulfillment and joy to them as well.

Fifth thing I've noticed with women who are naturally slim is they're much more practical about things when it comes to gaining weight, losing weight. If they notice their pants are getting tight, they just say, oh, I need to like cut back just a little bit. They don't say, oh my gosh, okay, I have 12 weeks.

I need to cut back this amount. I'm gonna start weighing, tracking and measuring all my food. It's just. More relaxed and carefree. More practical of, huh? I guess I've been eating more, I guess my calorie intake has been higher. Maybe I've been drinking more, maybe I haven't been moving my body as much, so it's just a subtle shift in one direction to the next.

They're more practical, more common sensical, honestly, about it. Back in the day when I was so obsessed with food and fitness, I knew more. About it than anyone I knew I was not at all deploying common sense in the slightest. I was always looking for the newest bio [00:07:00] hack. But surely it can't be that simple, surely.

We're missing something. But at the end of the day, it really is a lot more practical than we often care to admit. It can be a lot more simple. It's just how we're relating to all this stuff is really, really complicated understandably so because there's so much conflicting information out there. But by and large, these women just have a more practical common sense approach to their physiques, to gaining weight, to losing weight, to food in general.

The sixth habit I've noticed of women who are naturally slim, quote unquote, is they are not big drinkers. When it comes to alcohol, but I also have noticed they don't completely abstain either. And I'm not saying that any woman should be doing one or the other. It's your business. I don't care. Alcohol is a poison.

I'm not gonna sit here and tell you that you should drink. And I'm also not gonna sit here and tell you that you absolutely. Absolutely should not because it is a poison, right? All things in moderation, and there can be a lot of social benefits associated with it. With some people, it can be a form of connection, whether that's right or wrong.

That's just the way our society is right now. But I've noticed that these women [00:08:00] tend to, not abstain completely, but again, practice that sense of moderation. They're really mindful with their drinking. There's no scarcity. Sometimes they'll have the glass of wine, sometimes they won't. If it's a really good cocktail, they'll want it.

But they're not sitting here saying, I am here to get drunk. I am here to get my buzz on. Right. That's not a regular part of their lives. Do they tie one on every now and again? That is something I have noticed. Yes. But that also, again, just through observation, it's something I've observed that as I get older, becomes less and less frequent because these women.

Tend to care about their overall wellbeing and this just not something that is as appealing as we know. Those hangovers get more rough as we get older. Take what you want from this. Again, not saying right or wrong, just what I've observed. 

Number seven is these women tend to prioritize nutritious foods, not from a place of scarcity of I need to follow all these diet rules. It's just simply, they feel better eating more nutritious foods. Again, they have more of a practical common sense mindset with food. So more whole foods generally tend to be [00:09:00] better for them.

They feel better, they feel fuller, longer. They are also. This is important. I notice a lot of these women do tend to eat out often, so this idea that you have to meal prep you have to have all of these foods cooked ahead of time is not something that I've seen put into practice and as a requirement, certainly not for me, for clients, for other women that I have observed.

A lot of naturally slim women are practicing All of the other things that I've shared and will continue to share here in a moment, being really active, going out and prioritizing other things that are fulfilling in life. They go out to eat in cities often. They're going out to social dinners, they're going out to coffee dates, whatever it is, and everything is happening in moderation.

They're not saying, I have a 12 week timeline. I have a three month timeline. It's just generally they're living their lives. They go out when they're eating and they still eat those nutritious foods. It's not this last supper mentality. It's just baked in and incorporated into the way they live their lives.

They like to feel well. They like to treat themselves well. They like to eat nutritious foods most of the time, whether that they're cooking. Many of [00:10:00] them don't even cook that I've noticed. Whether they're cooking or they're eating out.

The eighth habit I've noticed of women who are quote unquote, naturally slim 

if they have a more indulgent meal or a more indulgent day. And by indulgent, I just mean. Higher calorie, maybe they eat more foods than they typically would. It's the holidays, vacation party, whatever that looks like for them. again, it's just subtle shifts, but if it's not a big overeating swing, that's not something I noticed with these types of women at all.

But naturally, if they had a really rich meal or they had an extra glass of wine, whatever it is, they had those things plus the dessert. next day things are subtly down, regulated a little bit, meaning that they eat a little bit less the next day. Whether that's intentional, whether that's natural, probably depends on the day combination of the two.

But that is something I've noticed where it's just a subtle shift. And I noticed this when I was still working on my relationship with food with a previous manager of mine. Over a decade ago where she said, yeah, gosh, you know, I would love to have, this special sandwich that was at the cafeteria that day, but I had burger and [00:11:00] fries last night, so I'm just gonna scale back a little bit at lunch.

And she had chicken and vegetables and I was like, huh. I guess it can be that easy. Can it? Yes, indeed. It can.

The ninth habit I've noticed of women who are naturally slim is they don't have this good or bad mentality with food, so they indulge without overdoing it. If they're craving something, they just have it. Again, it's not an event. Food is not this big part of their lives. So if they want a cookie or a brownie, they have a fricking cookie or a brownie, and then they move on with their day, they find one that is actually enjoyable for them, not a still one.

That is, oh my God, I'm gonna eat this whole package of Oreos right now. It's okay. I'm craving cookie. I'm gonna have a cookie, and then I'm gonna carry on eating and moving my body like I normally would. And I think a big part of this is they don't have these condensed, shortened timelines with all these goals and trying to manipulate and control their bodies all the time.

They are more focused on lifestyle of general long-term goals. So everything is subtle if they wanna lose weight, super subtle, no timeline. If they have gained weight, it's typically happened over a longer stretch of time because of subtle [00:12:00] shifts. If they have periods of eating more. No problem. They just subtly shift the other direction and eat a little bit less for a period of time.

So I've noticed that they do have these foods, and again, this broke my brain a decade ago when I was working on my relationship with food. I would see these women have the bagel sandwiches, the wine, the full fat, this, the, the high sugar that, and would think, what the heck? I am broken. This isn't fair. And it's, they just don't do that all the time.

And they would have half of a cookie. They would have a couple bites of something and then move on with their lives because they didn't have the scarcity when they don't have the scarcity mentality.

And the 10th habit I've noticed of naturally slim women is they very rarely overeat because they don't have this contemptuous relationship with food. They're not restricting, there's no scarcity mentality. They're connected to their bodies. Food is not this big event. So it is very rare for me to see these women again through observation.

And now this is the story for me. It's so rare for me to overeat because food is just food. It's not this big deal. And I never thought that I would be this person. So if you're [00:13:00] watching this video, if you're listening to this podcast and you're thinking, well, that's all fine and dandy, but I can never be that way.

I truly, with every fiber of my being, thought that I would be weird with food for the rest of my life. I thought that this was just the way that I was, that is not true. It is all of the fad dieting and all of the gripping and the control and the data and all of those things just screwed with my head so much that I forgot what it was like to be relaxed.

And peaceful and at ease with food. I had a lot of other work to do behind the scenes in order to get to this place. But if you wanna stop overeating and you want to become a woman who just naturally stops overeating, just know that it is possible for you. This is something these women deploy regularly, is they have the foods that they want.

This is a result rather number 10 of all the other things that I've listed previously, it's not an event. They move their bodies, they prioritize. Their wellbeing, they eat nutritious foods. Nothing is a big deal. They have subtle shifts in one direction or the other, and therefore they don't have this desire, this need to overeat.

So there you have it. Let me know what you guys have noticed in the comments if you're watching [00:14:00] this on YouTube. And if you are listening to this on the podcast, let me know over on Instagram in my dms or hop on over to YouTube as well and let me know. I think this is a really interesting topic and is something that I wish I had seen when I was younger, just to show that it wasn't about a missing rule.

It wasn't about a missing food or something I needed to cut out. It was truly about the way that I was relating. To food, to my body, to exercise, to all of it. now I am one of those women who just naturally can remain slim. I've lost 30 pounds and maintain it without thinking about it because of all the work I did prior, which is everything I listed here in this episode.

So I really hope this is helpful. If you want to address your relationship with food, I do have a free training, four steps to Stop obsessing about food. You can check that out in the show notes. If you're ready for a full blown course, I have food freedom, evolution, whether you're ready for fat loss, et cetera, find all of the details on my offerings in the show notes, and I will see you guys in the next one.