Most Popular Podcasts: A busy, stressed out CEO finds health and happiness. Interview with @this.phoenix.rising

This month we're re-broadcasting our most popular podcasts.

This week we are featuring our MOST downloaded podcast - our interview with @this.phoenix,rising.  Get ready to be inspired!

In  February 2020, Trish (@this.phoenix.rising) got the wake-up call when she found herself in the emergency room, unable to breathe for unknown reasons (likely Covid, but doctors did not believe it was in the United States at this point).  

She was also shocked to learn that she was carrying more than 200 pounds on her petite frame.  

Doctors informed her that if she made it home, she was a high stroke risk and would need to start regularly monitoring her blood pressure.  

Right then and there she vowed that if she survived this ordeal, she would get her health in order.  

She kept her promise.  And like a phoenix rising from the ashes, she completely transformed herself - body, mind, and spirit - by getting her nutrition, exercise, and mindset in order. 

Thanks for listening, we hope you enjoyed it.

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Transcript

0:49

Hello everyone. It's Joe again, and as I've been discussing all month long, we are replaying our most popular episodes of our podcast. This week, we are replaying our most downloaded episode of our podcast. Our interview with Trish at this Phoenix rising. And sharing her very amazing transformation story. Trish was I. Burnt out corporate executive. Who showed up in the emergency room on the brink of death and Dr. If she did not get her health in order. She would not live to see her son grow up. This terrified her and she took her health into her own hands. And what follows is her amazing, amazing transformation story. So. It's really inspiring and there's a reason. It is our most popular episode. Enjoy. Welcome to the boost your metabolism after age 30 podcast. I'm Joe and I'm Alison and we're your co hosts and the founders of couture fitness and lifestyle coaching. We're on a quest to help women design lives. They love and bodies. They adore. We were fed up with the dieting industry and decided to create something different. We're starting a calories up revolution where women are nourished. Their metabolisms are healed and their bodies and brains start working for them in the battle against weight loss. If you feel like your metabolism is wrecked and you want to lose weight once and for all, you are in the right place. Okay. Well, hello everyone. You've just got Joe today, but I have a very, very special guest on the podcast today. Her name is Trish. She is also known as at this Phoenix rising on Instagram. And I discovered Trish about a year ago, I had just started training for my second fitness competition at age 47. And I'm sure that's why Trish's You know, she came across my Instagram feed because she was also training for a fitness competition, and we were the exact same age. And I just immediately fell in love with her. She resonated with so much of what she had on her feed. She was a working mom, had a high pressure job, but she was doing this fitness competition. And then as I explored her story further, I was even more intrigued because she has quite a transformation story. And as I followed her over this Last year and a half. She's just such a special soul and a total ray of sunshine. So you're going to love this interview. And so, yes, we have Tricia who is at this Phoenix rising on Instagram. So Trish, do you want to introduce yourself and tell us a little bit about yourself and your amazing transformation? Sure. Well, first of all, thank you, Joe, for having me. I appreciate it. I love the opportunity to talk because I think so many women need to hear the message that it's never too late to get the life that you want. No matter what. So I think that's important for us as girls to foster other girls on that journey. Anyway, I am, like you said, I'm 48 now. I am a CEO. I own two companies and I've been a CEO for about 17 years. So really crazy, crazy life, you know, very, very high pressure, lots of hours. It was not uncommon for me to work 16 hours a day, that kind of thing. And then on top of it, I'm a single mom and my son has autism. So, you know, he didn't even speak to me. speak until he was four. And so the recovery process and trying to get him to lead a normal life fell squarely on my shoulders. You know, I was able to hire some therapists, but then they're like, Oh, go home and do this. And it was hours and hours of therapy a day. So I lost myself in between taking care of him and helping him become who he needed to be. And my highest stress job coupled with. My ambition, you know, and then throw into that mix, you know, I went through a very contentious divorce with a very abusive man. I had an extremely abusive marriage and I started my first company. As a way to escape that marriage. And so, when you're in an abusive situation, abusers don't want to let their prey go. So then, after I left and got divorced, it then led to an additional 12 years of litigation. It was extremely stressful, financially draining, and exhausting. So you put all that together, and it's a recipe for disaster. You are basically treading water trying not to drown. So that's kind of how it started. Yeah. Well, I, I am a lawyer. So I know, you know, in addition to just the burden of litigation, it's very emotionally draining as well. I'm sure, especially when it's, you know, we're talking about like a family law or divorce issue. So what happened, I guess, I guess let's forward to the beginning of, of 2020 and what you were doing and what was happening in your life. Yeah. So what was the switch for girls to know that I did not realize how out of shape that I was. I mean, did I notice that like, I wasn't happy about looking in the mirror? Did I try to like avoid mirrors? Yes. Did I wear, you know, I was like in the Stevie Nicks captain, you know, it was one of the most beautiful captains you can find. Right. So I didn't know what. I was, I, everything was stretch. I can't say that I hated myself. A lot of women are like mired in self loathing. I thought I was okay. I still thought I was cute. You know, I was just going through the motions, trying to survive, trying to do all the things I was doing. And then at the beginning of 2020 in February, I got really, really sick. I think it probably was COVID, but at the time they didn't test me because they said, Oh, I'm That's in China. It's not here. And I ended up in the emergency room and I couldn't breathe. And it was at that time that I got weighed. I had no idea how much I weighed my whole life. I've been about 135 pounds and they weighed me and I was 202 pounds. And they took my blood pressure, which traditionally has been very low, like so low that I would say to a doctor, like, don't be worried, it's always really low, which I said to this doctor. And he was like, Hmm. Let's do this again. And then let's do this again. And I'm like, what's going on? He's like, yeah, the lowest reading I got was one 66 over a hundred. And if you normally have low blood pressure, you could have a stroke at any moment. And he was like, so once you're discharged from here, once we get you stable, you have to go immediately and buy a blood pressure cuff and take your blood pressure at least three times a day. That terrified me. And so I remember sitting in the, you know, examination room and they were running all these tests. They took x rays of my chest. They were, did a flu test. They were giving me breathing treatments and it was really scary. And I didn't know what was going to happen. And I remember thinking like, Oh my God, what if I die? And this kid that I cherish, that is the most important thing in my entire life goes to that guy and is raised by that guy. That guy and is suffering abuse by that guy. And that's all I could think about. And so I eventually I was discharged and sent home and I was in bed for like three weeks. Couldn't move. It was like one of those things, you know, how like when you're in a pool and you're trying like you're waterlogged and you can't like walk in the pool, it's like hard to walk. That's how I felt. I felt like I couldn't even pull myself out of bed and it was so terrifying and it was so scary that I actually had the conversation with my son and my fiance about, you know, if I die, I want to be buried here. If I die, I want you to go to college. If I die, you know, I had all these instructions and we had to have like a really candid conversation about if I die. And it was really scary. And I think it scared the holy crap out of my kid. But in that moment, you know, you start bargaining. And I, you know, I don't go to church a lot, but I'm very, I believe in God. I have a very close relationship with God, I feel. And I started bargaining hard and was like, God, if you just let me live, you know, I went through like the litany of things. I'll be a good person. I'll stop drinking. I'll eat healthy. I'll cherish my body. I'll respect it. I'll do it. Please, God, let me live. And I got better. And so I kept my promise. I kept my promise to God, I kept my promise to myself and I started my journey by myself, you know, I got a book called the 10 day sugar detox and I cut out all the processed food and sugars and, you know, I just tried to do something and I just started walking every day. And in my neighborhood and it started out really slow because I had to recover and I couldn't breathe and it just slowly built up to walking 10 miles a day and just eating as cleanly as healthy as I could. I'll be at way too many calories I learned later, but I from like the beginning of March until July, I lost like 25 pounds on my own before I hired my coach. Okay. And that was just walking and paying some attention to your food. It sounds like. Yep. And not drinking, not eating processed food. Not eating out, which was easy. It was a pandemic. No one was eating out. Yeah. So if we could just back up a little bit, so one thing we do a lot of mindset coaching at couture fitness with our clients and we use the cognitive behavioral model. And so everyone, this, you might be able to identify with this. It seems like everyone comes to us. to us or when there's a problem, like, just tell me what to do. Give me the action step, which is important that you have good information and good direction. But I always try to say like, well, it's actually, we have to back up a few steps and, and what were you thinking and feeling that got you into this behavioral cycle? So what would you, but in your before story, what would, what would you say your actions were like your daily actions towards health? And then kind of what thoughts and feelings fueled that sort of lifestyle. Yeah. So my whole life I'd been pretty healthy. And in fact, I had done bodybuilding in my twenties. I was really, really committed to fitness and I was healthy and I remained healthy for the majority of my life until like the seven years prior to this, a few things changed. So in those seven years. I became vegetarian, which I had learned my body can't handle. So my body started falling apart. My hair started falling out. I started having issues. And then I got so mired in my work and in my kid that I thought I'll take care of me later. You know, I'll take care of that later. And I just kept pushing it off. I didn't prioritize my health at all. You know, I used to joke with my friends who were into running or whatever, that I run when chased. Like I run when chased, I never run, you know, like I, it was like a badge of honor to not work out. It was a badge of honor. Like talking about the wine you drank at night, you know, that sort of stuff. You know, I had lots of shirts that were like, it's wine's day, you know, so I didn't really care about me. I put all of my energy into absolutely everyone else. my kid, my clients, my employees, everyone else was more important than me. Yeah. One thing, you know, we talk about a lot is don't wake for the wake up call, but it sounds like you sort of did. Yep. There was probably nothing that was going to change me. I wasn't unhappy with how I looked enough. To go through the pain. And I was busy. Like, I was like, how in the world would I find an hour to fit in to work out? Well, you know, girls keep a little book. It's really simple. I have a book that I keep with me all the time and just write down what you're doing every hour. Once you look through that book, you're like, Oh, well, I was able to watch the real housewives for three hours. I was able to, you know, do these dumb things for this amount of time. Like when you really look at where you're spending your time, you have plenty of time to work out no matter how busy you are. So yeah, I think that's a great, that's a great tool. Like if you're, if you're telling yourself, I don't have the time, maybe a time audit might be in order. Okay. So then what did that switch to? Like, I have to stay alive for my son and this is my health has to come first. Yeah, it became survival. It became the most important thing was to get him to college, you know, to make sure that he could be independent, you know, as an autistic young man. And I, you know, and then I wanted to be able to lead him, you know, like if he was going to get married or if he's going to have children, I wanted to be there to help lead him and, and have me there for advice, like my parents are for me, my parents are in their seventies and, you know, both healthy and alive. So it just became, Oh my God. This is really important and you better get your stuff together, girl. Yeah. Well, and it sounds like you did. So tell us what happened in July. Okay. So it was back kind of like in March when I started exercising and stuff. And I was scrolling through Instagram and just so you know, prior to that, prior to me getting sick. Prior to all of this, I had started following train with Joan on Instagram, who is my coach's mom. Yeah. We love her. She's like our idol. Yeah. And she's even better in person. Like if you, you know how sometimes you meet people in person, that's kind of disappointing. She's even better. I had started training her. I remember being in my office and I found her account. I took it around to all my employees. Like, Oh my God, look at this woman. She's in her seventies. Like I found it fascinating and amazing, but not enough for me to do anything. And I was already following her and Joan made a post Transcribed That her daughter was doing a transformation program. And so I looked at it and I thought, you know, I had done bodybuilding in the past and I really loved it. And I thought, well, you know, I'll apply whatever. I had zero commitment to it. I just thought I'll try it. I'll, I'll apply. And I had heard that there were tons of applications and stuff. And I was like, I don't really care if I get in or not. And I remember about a month or so later, Michelle, my coach emailed me. And she said, I got your application. I'm going through them. And she said, I only take 20 women. I've already chosen the 20 women, but I'm considering a 21st and that's you, but I have some questions. And so she asked me all these very detailed questions and I answered them. And then she asked me more questions and I answered them. And then she asked me for my blood work that I had and I gave it to her. And then she kept asking questions. And I remember looking over at my fiance and I said, you know what? Like I, if this isn't good enough, like. I don't care. This is how it is. I'm just going to answer this. If this isn't good enough, I don't care. And I sent it off, come what may, I was not committed to the journey of being with her. And then she got back to me and said, I choose you. And I was like, Oh my God, what does that mean? And it wasn't going to start until July. I was like, okay, great. Well, between the time she chose me and my program started, it was a pandemic and I was stir crazy. I'm a goer. I like to go. So I bought an Airstream travel trailer and I said to my kid, Hey, you're senior year's remote. I'm working remote. I hate where we live in the Midwest. Let's go. And we spent the entire majority of the year on the road traveling. We were in the grand Tetons. We boondocked like we just would be like, okay, where do you want to go now? And we would drive. We did over 15, 000 miles in that airstream. So I call, you know, I messaged my coach as this program was getting ready to kick off. And I was like, Hey, by the way, I'm not going to have access to a gym. I'm living in an airstream. I hope it's not a problem. She told me later, she was like, ah, this girl's done. She's never going to make it. Like she was like, it's never going to happen. Um, but what I did was I bought a big, huge car carrier for the top of our car and I loaded it with weights and bands and straps and sandbags and step ladders and, you know, yoga mat and took it with me on the road. And every day I worked out wherever you were, either a campground or like literally in the wilderness with bears. I was out there every morning at 6 AM busting my hump, doing the workouts and doing my cardio with bear spray. And, um, coach tailored my workouts to having only those tools. So I also hate it when girls tell me I can't afford a gym or I can't go to the gym or I'm in lockdown. And I mean, you know, when I started, I was in lockdown too. The first week before we left in the airstream was at home and I was using my piano bench as a bench. I was, you know, using my fireplace hearth. as a step up for, you know, step ups. I mean, you can do it. You don't need specific equipment in order to do a transformation. So the majority of my transformation was done with zero gym, zero equipment, me living in a travel trailer, traveling the United States with my family. Well, yeah, and I think that's a testament to your coach, too. A good coach will meet you where you are. And frankly, if you haven't done anything, you can get a long ways just doing body weight exercise for resistance training. So you got to start somewhere, right? And so the one thing I love about your Instagram is you you share a lot of pictures of you working out with the bear spray. Yeah, a lot of pictures back from that time period, which I think is amazing. And it's so inspiring because you obviously look very different now and we'll get to that in a second, but I mean, you have to start somewhere. And for a lot of women, it's really intimidating when you're 40, 50, 60 pounds overweight to even get started. So do you want to talk a little bit about that? Like kind of, you know, I guess pushing through that time period. I'm sure it was very hard, like physically hard and demanding. So how'd you get through it in your airstream? Well, you know, at the beginning when I was 202 pounds, you know, I just started walking by the time I started with my coach, I'd lost, you know, over 25 pounds. I kind of felt like, okay, I've got this. This is going to, you know, I'm ready. I'm ready. Feel good. It's July wearing shorts. It's good. And then I remember the first workout. And I remember like, Oh my God, I think I'm going to die. Like, I can't do like stuff that had been so easy for me in my twenties, like step ups, right. Um, I was like struggling and I have a video of me doing these step ups where I'm like out of breath and I can't do it. And I'm like, and you can see the absolute pain in my body as I'm doing it. You know, it was very, very, very, very hard, but I never quit. I never gave up. And the thing that I tell ladies is, The first 30 days is miserable. I mean, it's miserable. It's horrible. It's so painful. And you think, like, I can't do this. But you can do whatever you tell yourself. So, even though I was in excruciating pain, and it was so hard to breathe and do these exercises, I never told myself I couldn't do it. And I just was like, you're gonna do this. Like, I'd get up in the morning and, like, in the mirror, like, Girl. You got this. We're going to do this. We're going to kick ass. You are an athlete. You are like every day. So I would do it. And you know, it's tough because my coach is virtual and I would film my workouts and I would send them to her. And you know, the feedback was not kind and you have to be able to take that constructive criticism over and over. You know, you keep trying. She'll say, no, you got to do this, adjust that. Okay. So the next time you do it and you adjust those things, you think, Nope, that's not it. You got to do this. You got to do that. And it's, Always changing until you get it right and you can't get frustrated by it. You have to know that she has the greater good in mind. She's helping you prevent injury and you're going to get better. And so I looked at it as a challenge. Anytime she gave me feedback, like I'm going to kick ass at this, right? I'm going to do this, but yeah, it's super hard and you just have to push through. I guess you just have to look at it like it's a take no prisoners, you know, there's a choice. Don't give yourself a choice to not do it. Yeah. See it as a challenge rather than being a victim to the process. Right. Don't be a victim. No victim mentality. Okay. So let's talk about the food and the nutrition. So when you started working with your coach, how did that change? And, and how did you manage that in the airstream? You know, when I was eating prior to working with her, I had, I had gone through this book, The 10 Day Diet. Sugar detox by Dr. Mark Hyman. People ask if I recommend that book, not really not given what I know now, but it was okay for me to start with, I was eating way more than I needed to and far more actual sugar naturally than I should have. But the thing that was interesting was when I started with my coach, she had me eating five times a day and she, you know, gave me a program based on macros, you know, protein, carbs, fats, and a combination of that. And it was so much food. That I was like, Oh my God, like, I can't eat this much. I can't eat this often. It was so much like trying to get all that protein in, you know, she's having me like 150 grams of protein a day. And that's hard to do at the beginning. I was so full and I remember just having to force feed myself. And it was simple in the Airstream because, you know, we had a refrigerator, you know, we had a grill, we had a microwave, although I never used it. Everything I made was either fresh or it was grilled. And it was pretty simple. And my family ate what I ate. I just measured and ate less. I, it was nothing special for me. I took a, you know, ninja blender and I would make protein shakes. I'd have at least a protein shake a day to help me get that protein in. It wasn't that hard. And so when girls message me now and they start a program like this and they say, Oh my God, how did you eat this much? I'm like, Oh, enjoy it now. Cause really quickly that food is like, it goes from, Oh, I'm so full too. Oh my God. I'm hungry all the time because your body starts processing it. The metabolism starts speeding up again. You're putting in all this activity and you get hungry. You're going to be hungry. So enjoy that time. Yeah. So are, and are you a cook or anything like, do you, are you, do you enjoy preparing food or was this like a get it done? Kind of. There's nothing in life I detest more than cooking. Nothing. I mean, maybe going to the dentist. That's it. I hate cooking. I'm not a good cook. I don't like to meal plan. None of that. So learning macros and my coach. You know, demanded, I mean, demanded that you plan your meals in advance in the nap, and she would review it was very challenging for me. That was probably my biggest challenge and my biggest resistance, that stubborn personality that I have was very resistant to that. Yeah. And I would, I want to talk about that in a second, your relationship with your coach. Cause I think it's. It sounds great and very interesting. Okay. So when you started this work with your coach, was the plan to do a show or was it just a transformation? Zero desire to do a show. I thought that was crazy. Now I had done a really small show when I was 26 or seven, I guess. Like it was one of those things where the gym I belong to, they were like, Hey, we're doing this show. And I was like, Oh, I'll try it. You know, it was nothing. Like the WBFF or IFBB or anything. So I had a tiny bit of what I thought it was. And I was like, that's not for me. And so my only goal was really to be healthy. You know, my coach was very clear about what is your why and what are your goals? And she wants to make sure that your goals are reasonable. You don't want to be 220 pounds and say, Oh, I need to be a hundred pounds in six months. You know, you have to be reasonable. And my, my why was never to compete. It became that later after I saw. How my body was responding to this training. It was so fascinating. And my coach who is world renowned fitness competitor, I identify with her a lot. We're very much alike. The two of us, um, very type A, very headstrong, very goal oriented. And I loved watching her through her contest prep, because I saw how it invigorated her and gave her. Like a reason it gave her a goal. It gave her something to strive for. You know, when you're in the gym, it's very easy to be like, Oh God, that feels kind of heavy. I'll just, you know, take some weight off and fluff through the reps. Right. But if you have a goal, like competing, it makes me really laser focused in the gym and it makes me push. So hard. I would never push that hard if I weren't competing. So that is one of the reasons why I decided to do it. Yeah. Tell us about like how your body responded to all of this. And then at what point you decided that you're going to go for the gusto and do a show. Yeah. So, you know, at the beginning it was humiliating taking those photos in a swimsuit. In fact, I didn't have a swimsuit to fit. I wore a sports bra and like some bottoms. You know, really bad. And I had like, you know, cottage cheese legs and my abdomen was extremely humongous. And my boobs were just, I mean, so big, you know, I, I didn't, I don't even know what size bra I was wearing. Cause I would wear those stretchy bras because they were just huge. And my whole body was just big. And I thought to myself, like, Am I, you know, I just assumed like, I just wanted to get smaller. I didn't really care about how my body looked. I wasn't here to be the hot girl. I was just here to be smaller, have cardiovascular health and stay alive. That's all I wanted. But then as I started lifting weights and eating in this very regimented macros based, and I, you know, was no longer vegetarian, my coach was very clear about, I need you to eat protein and it's going to have to be animals. How do you feel? And I was like, Oh, I mean, I eat so much. Some animal protein, but I really hate the taste of it. And she's like, you're going to have to get over it. And so I did. And what I saw was my body started responding. My hair was getting thick. My skin completely changed. I had energy, like I hadn't had before. And then the cellulite was like melting away. And my, I started forming muscles and my complete body composition. Like I went from being, you know, very heavy and, and, and you look, you know, doughy and heavy, you know, when you look at my before and after, it's not like, oh, she's just a smaller version of that. I look completely different my whole life. I had a pick what I call pancake ass. You know, my, my butt was flat as could be, you know, it's genetic. My whole family's like that. And I never thought I would have like one of those nice JLo booties, you know, but it's getting there. It's doable. So now like, I don't have a gut anymore, but I got a booty, you know, and seeing this crazy thing that my body was doing, like this massive science experiment was so invigorating to me that I just couldn't get enough. Like I couldn't wait to wake up the next day to be like, what's going to be different today? What can I do today? Like, it just became this almost like a game. You know, so yeah, I think that's really interesting because that's sort of what my experience was the first time I did a fitness competition. I didn't actually have a lot to lose, but I have some of my transformation pictures. I mean, like my just body composition was totally different and I was running and not just not really. paying attention to what I was eating. It wasn't bad. I thought I was a healthy eater. I mean, I had been a subscriber to Shape Magazine and eating what any other person would call, but like little to no protein. The first competition I did was on a dare. My now business partner, Allison, was marched into my office one day and said, you're competing with, we're going to show 40 who's boss. You're competing with me. So it was different than any other diet I had done before because it was like, oh, okay. And so I went in and, you know, I kind of view viewed it all of like, okay, so this coach is gonna optimize my nutrition and my exercise and I wonder what my body will do. And like you, I fell in love with it. I just could not believe how good I felt like my body was just changing right before my very eyes and it was. Such an amazing experience. And you're right. You would never do the things you would do to get ready for a competition. If you didn't have that big, well, frankly, if you didn't have the pressure of getting in a microscopic bikini at the end of the road, but I know, you know, fitness competitions get bad raps, I mean, like a lot of people, like, you know, and so I wanted to. Ask you like, you know, I, I've had people like, how can you do that? How can you get on a stage and let men judge you? My daughter, my, my 15 year old daughter was like, that's so unfair that you get on a stage and they get to judge you and you have to get up there and hold your stomach in. And that's not been my experience. I think it, this is another thing where it's like how you approach it and like your perspective. So talk to, talk to us about that. Like how, I mean, I, I explained to my daughter, I was like, well, Number one, I've, I've asked for this, I am willingly doing this. And I think the, and I've had other women like, Oh, that would be so horrible. And the feedback you get from the judges is not like, you know, get your fat rear off the stage. You have no business belonging. It's a very, like, I don't know. It was the first time anyone had objectively said like, okay, well, you know, we need to build out your lats or, you know, you could bring up your glutes or that sort of thing. And no one. I had never talked to myself about my body in that way. And it was very refreshing to me. I did not take it as criticism or like an indictment. So tell us about your experience with that. I love that. Such a lawyer. Yeah. So, okay, let me, let me put it this way. So when my coach said, Hey, you know, do you want to do a competition? I said, yeah, I think I'll do this competition in August. And she recommended that I go watch one. So I traveled to Orlando. in April and watched my very first WBFF show in person. And I have to tell you, the experience as an, as an audience member made me really question whether I wanted to get on stage. I saw all these girls up there posing and, you know, they're being compared to one another. And I thought to myself, you know, As someone who is a female business owner, who has championed women, who goes and gives talk to, talks to like gender studies programs about being a woman and, and, you know, how we can succeed in life and, and the biases there are against women. Am I taking myself in womanhood, you know, 70 years back? I mean, you know, women haven't been voting that long. Right. And so I had all this like chatter in my head about, Man, this isn't who I am, you know, I'm a feminist and I decided to go through with it because I had told my coach I would. And I thought, you know what, I'm going to look at this in a different way. So how I approached it was it was my emancipation. And so that's also kind of where my Instagram name comes from this Phoenix rising, because I have looked at this process as an emancipation from all that bound me. A lot of that was the. Abuse that I suffered and the still constant abuse I suffer in litigation from my ex. I'm still in court. My son is 18 and a half, almost 19. And so I looked at it like stepping out from this fire and rising. And that is how I approached that competition. So I looked at it as my emancipation. It wasn't about anyone else. It was about me, the theme where I designed and the bikini I designed with my designer was all based on that. This phoenix rising and emancipation, and that's all I cared about. I didn't care about anybody else competing. I didn't care about winning. I didn't care about anything, but stepping on that stage, stepping into my power and emancipating myself from my past. And knowing that on that day, August 13th was the beginning of my new life. And I was emancipating myself on television that was televised around the world and saying, here I am, this is my life. And that's what I did. And so when I got there and I got on the stage, what I didn't anticipate was the amazing euphoria that I felt like, you know, I, I, I'm not a nervous person. I do a lot of public speaking, but I was nervous about getting on stage and a bikini and all this stuff and I was nervous, but when, when they called my name. And I stepped out there and you have to step into the spotlight for that one moment and you pose and then you do your T walk. As I stepped into that spotlight, it was like, I've never done drugs, but I imagine it's like when you do cocaine, because I got this like tingly feeling all over my body. And it was this amazing high. And I don't remember anything that happened except for one thing. And that was, I could not stop smiling. I remember this childlike joy of like, I couldn't make my face stop smiling. I was so happy. And so for me, it was a great experience because I looked at it from a different point of view, not objectification. And as you get to know the other women who are doing this as well, you learn that most women who are in fitness competitions are doing it for a reason. And it's not because they want to be the hottest and it's not because they want the crown necessarily. It's because they are overcoming something. I can't tell you all the stories I heard backstage about abuse. Um, they're overcoming eating disorders. They're, they're, they're overcoming something in their lives. And this is something that can control and something that they can say, I am achieving, it gives them a goal. It gives them purpose. And it's a really beautiful thing. I think if you look at it from that point of view. Yeah, I agree. That's an amazing story. It brings tears to my eyes. And you said something earlier that I think probably a lot of women can relate to that, you know, you had lost yourself. And, and that was kind of the, the first time I did a show. I had two small children. My husband had just purchased an accounting firm in Chicago. I was working full time, had a pretty demanding job. And I You know, I went and met with the coach and we came up with the plan. And I just remember thinking like, if I don't, this is for me, if I don't do this, like I am like reclaiming a piece of me, like the job wasn't really about me, you know, I love my kids, but I mean, I was driving all around town. My husband, you know, he had his thing. And I just remember very clearly thinking like, this is for me. And, and if I don't do this, I will lose myself. So, um, I really do think that journey to health and I would call it wholeness almost. I mean, no, I had never, I had done marathons. I'd had running coaches. No one ever talked to me about nutrition or how to fuel my body. Everything was geared towards like, how hard can you hit it? How little can you eat? Nothing was like ever kind of coordinated in this way and optimized. And it was so amazing. And I really, really do. Like if you don't have your health, you don't have much and nothing feels better than feeling strong. And it's something that I wish all women could experience. However, you find that not necessarily doing a show, but just that euphoric feeling of like, I am healthy and I am strong and I am on top of the world. Yeah. And there's other things you can do. I don't think a show is for everyone. It is extremely grueling, especially those last 12 weeks before you. I mean, it's, it's, it's. Very, very, very, very difficult. Even for someone who's a high achiever like me, it was very grinding. But you know, you could do a photo shoot. You could schedule a photo shoot on a certain day, have some sort of end goal, whether it's, you know, you want to go to an event and wear a certain dress, or you want to have a photo shoot or whatever, but you got to have a goal of some kind. And it doesn't have to be a competition. I don't want people to think that, Oh, if I'm not going to step on stage, I don't need to get healthy. And I shouldn't consider macros and I shouldn't consider weight training because if you want to live a long life and you want to be healthy, you better put some muscle on in your forties. And from there going forward, you know, I look at my mom who's extremely healthy, but you know, she's a, she's a cardio queen, right? She just wants to do cardio all day for hours. And she's so skinny. And so thin, and she's so proud that she's at her high school weight. And I keep saying to her, mom, I'm proud of you, but you know, you should probably think about putting on some muscle because as you get older, you need muscle. If you fall or you get sick or you end up in the hospital, that muscle is what's going to keep you alive. You know, so she is starting to lift a little bit of weights. I'm really proud of her. That's really great. But, you know, I think every woman really needs to consider what weight training and having some muscle on their bones will do for their optimal health, especially as they get older. Absolutely. It's one of the most important things you can do for your health. There are so many things it guards against. Well, I want to talk about, go back to the being vegetarian and then also sort of the approach your coach used or uses. It sounds like a very no excuses, no holds barred sort of approach. Yep. So, okay. So you were vegetarian for a while and, and how was that experience for you? Oh God. So, you know, I had always eaten fairly healthy. And then, you know, when I started going through all this litigation, I mean, it was so intense that I started having panic attacks and I didn't know what to do. I'd never had panic attacks. And so I started researching and I kept hearing about yoga. So I started doing yoga. And I am not bendy. It was a process. And so I got really into the yoga community. I mean, really into yoga, hours a day of yoga. And then, you know, as you, as you integrate into that community, most people, they're like into juicing and they're vegetarian. They're all about the earth. And so I started being like meeting all these people and they were like, you should watch this documentary. I think it was like forks over knives or something. I was like, just casually, Oh yeah, just let me throw this on. And I watched it. And it traumatized me when I saw and I was like, I remember I was supposed to go to dinner that night to this, um, Indian restaurant and there's nothing in life I loved more than chicken vindaloo. And so I watched this documentary prior to going out and I remember I got to the restaurant was like, I just can't eat chicken. I can't. I can't eat it. And then it, it was like a switch. I just stopped eating meat. I couldn't get out of my head what was happening to these animals. And I felt so guilty as a human. And so, yeah, I was vegetarian for seven years because of, of that. It traumatized me. And, you know, in my household, my kids still ate meat, but the rule was whatever you take, you eat. We do not waste this animal that gave its life for your nourishment. And then, uh, you know, Uh, at one point I went to a chiropractor or something. I wasn't feeling well. I had some issues going on prior to getting really sick. And he was like, you know, what are you eating? And I told him, he was like, Whoa, yeah, need to eat some chicken. And I was like, I can't, I can't eat chicken. He's like, you're gonna eat some chicken. So I integrated very slowly, some eggs and some chicken into my diet prior to meeting my coach. But it was super challenging eating all of those grams of protein at the beginning and getting over that mental hurdle of eating animals. It was really very hard for me. How did you feel physically like integrating more protein into your diet? I mean, at first I hated it, especially mentally, but what I noticed was I started having more energy and I started feeling more clear headed and my nails started, you know, I've always had really thick nails that were like hard to clip, you know, but then when I went vegetarian, like you could just. tear them off, you know, they were just thin as could be. My nails were coming back. My hair was growing and getting lustrous. And I was like, Whoa, this is crazy. I saw how my whole body was changing, how my skin changed. You can look at pictures of me at this weight when I was vegetarian, the same way that I am today. And I look 15, 20 years older than I do today because my skin was just. I look totally different. So that protein made a big difference in my body and my energy. And so I've committed to doing it. I haven't fallen back now. I will never eat pork. It will never happen. So I do have some parameters. I eat very little red meat, very little, you know, if my iron is low or something, I will incorporate some more for that. But yeah, it's mostly, you Fish, chicken, eggs, beans, that sort of stuff. Yeah. Yeah. I've competed in my last show. One of my teammates was vegan, but I mean, she still had to get the protein in. And I'm not exactly sure how she did it. So it doesn't even if you are a vegetarian or vegan, you still got to get the protein in. The problem is when you're doing it as a vegetarian, that your calorie intake is so much more because you have to. eat so much more to make up that protein. So it's, and there are vegan bodybuilders and my hat is off to them. I think that's great. Um, it's just not something that I could do. Yeah, I agree. I think it would be tough. Okay. Let's talk about your coach. You know, as I, as I coached myself, you know, we're, we're humans. And so we, we are self limiting beliefs. get in the way. So, but I guess what was the cadence? Did you have to check in with your coach every day, every week? What did you have? What sort of data did you have to give her? She uses an app called true coach and that's where she loads all of our workouts. So every day you have to do your workouts and you have to upload at least two videos of, you know, you pick certain exercises. As I've grown, it's always the complex lifts, those compound harder lifts that she always wants to see. See, and then you have to measure yourself every day and weigh yourself every day and put it into that app. And then you take progress photos and you check in every week. So, or, you know, sometimes more often, if you're not getting the results, she likes to see, you could be checking in every day. So you gotta keep coach happy. And then of course, during contest prep, I mean, I was checking in three times a day with, you know, showing videos of my abs. And, you know, everything, it was very intense, but that's to be expected. But just as a normal client, that's what I was doing. And she had very specific rules. You know, you had to plan out your meals in the, my macros app for her to review, you know, to make sure you're doing it. That was a non negotiable. You had to weigh and measure and do all that and do your progress photos weekly, non negotiable. She made us be a part of a Facebook group where every week we had to post our progress photos for our teammates to see, which was embarrassing at first. And you had to talk about very deep things in your posts. You know, they would ask questions that you had to respond to, and you had to really give some thought as to, wow, What does that mean to me? You know? So yeah, if you missed a check in, you're fired. She'll cut you off right then. You, there's no excuses. And how do you think she would take if you're like, well, I got busy at work and didn't have time, how would that be received? You're, you're gone. I'm serious. She was very serious. In fact, there's a video of me. So, okay, so I left on this trip in the airstream, right? We're going cross country, three dogs, my kid, my dogs are Frenchies, so they don't do well in the heat. It's July. We are traveling through the boiling Midwest and we stopped for our first stop on our way out West, right? And we pull into this campground set up shop. And the trailer like exploded. The electrical blew up. No air conditioning, no nothing, nothing. And I remember like crying and saying to my fiancé, who thankfully is very handy, like, oh my, oh my God, what do we, like, are we going home? Like, what do we do? And he was like, ripping everything out of the airstream, all the stuff. Seeding everything. And he is rewiring he's testing. He's, and so we, you know, we were all boiling in a hundred degree weather all night, we didn't have air conditioning. We didn't have anything, you know, I had to put everything in my macros. I, and I told myself like, I, you know, how am I going to survive? I can't do this. Well, the refrigerator ran on propane, so it was still running. The grill runs on propane, still running. So what excuse do you have not to do your workout, not to do your macros? You have no excuse, right? So I made no excuses. So I'm working out at the campground. He's rewiring the airstream and I'm so stressed, but I'm still doing my workout and I get a message from my coach and I see it because I'm filming, right? So I'm like filming on my iPhone and I see this message pop up and it says something like, if you're not going to take this program seriously, I don't want you in it. And I'm like, what? No, this is like day four. I'm like, what? What? And so I'm like trying to get to the message. And I'm like, what are you talking about? You know, I respond and she's like, you haven't uploaded any of your meals in my macros. And I told you it was a deal breaker. And if you're not going to take this seriously, you're out. And I was like, I have uploaded it. And she's like, no, you haven't. It's not in there. I went and looked and I'm like, furiously taking screenshots and sending it to her. And she was like, oh, well, my, my macros was not uploading to the cloud on there. I wasn't able to see it. So she thought I wasn't doing my job. So there are subsequent videos as I'm texting back and forth with her and I'm still doing my work out of me. Sobbing uncontrollably, sobbing, doing my workout, like, you know, she doesn't believe me and I'm doing the right thing. I have no air conditioning and I'm hot and I don't know what to do. And like, you know, I'm still doing the workout and it's all filmed. And I think about that moment, you know, I was so excited about this opportunity once I had it. I didn't want to lose it. And so she's very serious, you know, out of our 21 people, I think by the end of the time we all had together, we had 14 or something that either quit or she, you know, cut. And I think that's important. You got to have accountability. You know, it's her reputation too. She doesn't want to have somebody in her program that, you know, is going to give a half ass effort and, and then have us be like, Oh, this was my coach. I get that as a business owner. So you want success. And so she tries to weed through the applications to see who has a success mindset so that she knows that she won't have to deal with that. So yeah, and how do you think like a softer, gentler approach would have worked for you? It would not have worked. I would have walked all over them. So like for me, I am really type A and I'm very headstrong. You know, I started law school, so I'm a fantastic negotiator. arguer, I can reason anything. So if I have somebody who was like sweet and kind, which some of the wonder women coaches are very sweet and kind. And I think to myself, gosh, they're really nice. And gosh, I could never work with them because I would run over them. I would run over them. So I needed someone who was going to hold me accountable. Someone that I respected and someone that I trusted that if they, you know, because she'll like message me and she'll see my measurements or something. And she'll say, yeah, I went into true coach. I saw your measurements were changing your macros right now. And when she says right now, that doesn't mean tomorrow. That means right now, like next meal, it better be changed. And she's going to look at it. And it is hard to pivot like that, you know, in everyday life. But I trust her. Because I know what she knows what she's doing. And so I just like, okay, she tells me jump. I ask how high and I do it. So I've always said she is, you know, a great general and I am a good soldier. So it was, was there any point that you just wanted to rebel and no, you know, I vetted her. I respected her. I firmly believed that she knew what she was talking about, that she was an expert in her field. And for me, my business is nothing, nothing makes me more angry than when someone hires my company. Uh, and we are the experts in what we do. And then they, you know, Don't want to do what we say and they rebel and they buck the system. And then they're like, Oh, why are we not getting results? And I'm like, we know what to do, but you don't trust us and you don't do what we say. And it makes me very angry. So I knew that if I hired somebody and I was spending this kind of money, cause it's not cheap that I was going to do exactly what they said, because. She's the expert, not me. If I were an expert, I wouldn't have been 202 pounds with 166 over 100 blood pressure. I'm clearly not an expert. So trust the experts. That's what I say. Very, very true. So what's your next big goal? We, in our coaching program, we, we try to set big impossible fitness goals. What's your next big goal? So I'll be competing in December of this year. So that's the next goal. So right now I'm going to build and then, you know, of course we'll cut probably, I would imagine she's gonna start my cut earlier than 12 weeks. So, which I'm really looking forward to, I can't wait to cut, but yeah, I'm building right now. And so in the interim I have like, you know, strength goals. So every I'll set strength goals for like deadlift, squats, bench press, stuff like that. And then I'll give myself a timeframe. And I give them to my coach. And then once I hit them within that timeframe, then we set new ones. So that's how I kind of keep motivated as I'm going through this build building as a, you know, it's not easy on the mind, especially after you've, you've spent all this time watching the scale go down, down, down, down, down, down. You know, it's a celebration. I lost half a pound. Yeah. Some of the bricks celebrate, and now it's like. Your goal is to either stay the same or slowly build, grow, grow, grow, grow. And you're like, Oh God, the scale's going up. And so sometimes I have to quell my fears, you know, so I take progress photos every week and they're very important. And I look forward to them so much because they show me the actual progress. I can see from week to week, but sometimes like. Say, um, you know, I'm 130 pounds and I'm freaking out because, you know, when I was on stage, I was 124, I'll go back and I'll find a picture when I was 130 pounds as I was losing, you know, my initial cut and I'll put them side by side and it is astronomically different. It's astronomically different how different I look 130 pounds when I, you know, if November of 2020 and 130 pounds in January, 2022. It's like a completely different human. So then I'm like, okay, no, this is, it's good. It's working. You're good. Keep it up. I think I agree. I think the pictures help so much and partly just to, you know, I look so much better now than I did, I would say even in high school, our bodies are so amazing. They are capable of so much and they are dynamic. And if we just give them the right inputs, it's just amazing what they can do. One reason I still compete is to see the 50, 55 year olds up there who, I mean, they look amazing. Amazing. Oh yeah. Um, and they've just been doing it year after year and, you know, treating their bodies maybe not the last month leading up to a competition that that's, that, you're right, that's very, very grueling. But they've just led a very healthy lifestyle and made time for it. So yeah, I have so many friends. You know, as I've gotten into this community, I've made so many good friends and I have friends in. sixties and seventies who are bodybuilders and they are just amazing and they're so like youthful just in their spirit and how they approach things. And I really enjoy them so much. I've made such great friendships through this and we're all like minded. So it's really fantastic. And that said, If you want to transform your life and you want to lose weight and you want to change the trajectory of your life, you have to be willing to let go of things. You have to be willing to sacrifice. And so some of the things I've sacrificed is alcohol, processed food, eating whatever the hell I want when I want, going out to eat and like eating pastas and breads and all of that, and friends. I've lost a lot of friends, and I'm okay with that. I've lost a lot of people. Friends, just because the lifestyle has changed. Well, you know, you find out who your friends are, right? So some friends will cheer you on. They see what you're doing. They are like, Oh, this is amazing. I'm so proud of you. Whether they're on that trajectory or not, right? I'm proud of you. Then there are friends who are just. Insanely jealous or insanely judgmental, or they're the thwarters, they're the frenemies, you know, who are like, Oh gosh, you look great. We should go, you know, meet for dinner and you go meet them. And they're like pushing on you. Come on, just one glass of wine, just one glass, just try this. It's so delicious. Just, just try it, just try it. Oh, you already look great. You can do this, the thwarters. And you learn who those people are. And I was afraid at first to cut them out of my life. But then once I did, I just learned, like, I had so much more room and so much more capacity for people who were so good to me. And it really changed this really amazing, positive. You know, course of my life. I don't miss any of those people at all. I was going to ask, I mean, what, what is your favorite part of this new lifestyle? And do you miss anything of your old lifestyle in terms of like the eating exercise kind of daily habits? You know, my favorite thing is just how good I feel. I've never felt so amazing. It really is like a high and, you know, I have an extremely stressful career. It's beyond. stressful. There are, especially lately, I've been under a lot of stress and so many things are happening. And so I, I used to work out at five in the morning, every morning. Now I work out at the end of my work day because it's such a great stress reliever that everything that was bothering me just melts away when I'm in the gym. Like it is just the most empowering, amazing feeling. And I get this high that is so. Fabulous. So that is probably the very best thing. I don't really miss anything. Part of the thing is, you know, I did this during a pandemic. So the hard part was done where you couldn't go out to eat. There was nothing to do. There's nowhere to go. There's, you know, I was living in the wilderness because there was nothing else to do. There's no malls, there's nothing. So it made it easier now that things are like opening up and people are doing stuff. Sometimes I miss like having a cocktail, like, you know, when you go on a date, with your, with your guy and you're, you're going to like the dark, nice little smoky kind of, you know, room. It's a steakhouse and you just want a glass of red wine. I do miss that, but I've, I've allowed myself, I think I've had six drinks since I started this in July and now from the very beginning. So from March, 2020. I think I've had six drinks, every single one of them. I've regretted everyone. I feel like crap, you know, I used to be able to drink a bottle of wine and I, and it didn't even, you know, I didn't think it affected me. I felt fine. Like it's no big deal. I'll drink a glass of wine now. And I feel like death the next morning. So I, I don't, I definitely don't miss feeling like that. And so it's not worth it to me. So I just have like a Pellegrino with a lime. I have the experience. Without the devastation of the alcohol. Yeah, and I, I think that's even an experience in and of itself to know, yeah, like to get away from some of those substances long enough to even realize the impact they are having on your body or your sleep or how you feel. Sometimes we haven't even allowed ourself that, like, what, what would I feel if I didn't drink wine for a week? Right. You know, one of the things, um, I realized, um, So a lot of people say to me, I can't afford to work out. I can't afford a coach. I can't afford, you're so lucky. You must be rich. I'm not rich. But I will tell you prior to doing this, I was going to Starbucks at least once a day, at least sometimes twice a day. And I was getting a venti, whatever, usually something like a cookie crumble, venti mocha, whatever. It was this humongous thing with all this whipped cream. That was like 780 calories. Twice a day, I would do that. And those drinks were like almost 9. So at least 10 a day was going to Starbucks. And then I would have my wine at night, right? So you're looking at least 20 bucks a day on wine and Starbucks and cutting that all out, you know, 20 times three 30, that's more than enough to pay for a coach. And now that I eat healthy, You know, it's so much more economical to eat healthy. It's super easy. I mean, I'm basically eating protein and vegetables. It's easy to do. After I realized like, wow, like we're, I would look at my bank account. Like, am I missing something? Did something happen? Did I, like, why do I have money that I didn't think I should have? And then, oh, it's Starbucks. It's wine. It's eating out. It's this horrible lifestyle that I have. So now I have money for all the cute workout clothes and I have money to buy new clothing and I have money to save and I have money for my coach. It's been great. So I highly recommend kicking Starbucks to the curb. It's some of the worst stuff you can put in your body, you know, really limit or just absolutely eliminate alcohol. I say about that, like, don't let eating out Starbucks and wine be the consolation prize for the life that you really want to live. A lot of times these are just buffers for like, well, I didn't get up and work out again in the morning. I'll swing by Starbucks to make myself feel better. You know, they, they really are, like I say, consolation prizes. It's like self soothing. It's like when a baby is upset or maybe a three year old's upset and you give it the pacifier still. Yeah. Three year old doesn't need a pacifier. You know, it's the same kind of thing and you just have to retrain your brain. So now I've retrained myself to have other things that are like treats. You know, for me, a treat is going hiking every week. I love to hike now. I do it every week, no matter the weather. You know, for me, a treat is being outside. And just enjoying the sunshine, you know, a treat for me is going for a walk. I, I, everything has changed. Like I was never outside. I spent my entire life inside and never went outside. And now I, I long to be outside. Like I would be outside all day if I could. And so everything has really changed and it's all because I got healthy. And now that I'm, I feel so able in my body, I can do all the things. I can ice skate. I can run. I can hike. I can scale mountains. I mean, I have pictures of me dangling off of mountains and stuff. Like a year and a half ago, I was obese. I'm scaling mountains. Like if somebody said to me in January, 2020, Hey, yo, In 2022, you're going to be scaling mountains. I'd be like, you are so funny. And I have a million dollars in my pocket right now, too. So everything can change if you just allow it to change for you. I totally agree. So I guess that's maybe how we can wrap up. What what's your best advice? to someone, maybe a woman who has a very demanding job and is staring at 40 plus pounds to lose. I imagine that has to feel like climbing Mount Everest. So what's your best advice to that person? I think that you have to really look at your mindset. More than anything, and you have to look at what's holding you back. That's easier said than done. There are a lot of really great books that can help you through that. One of them that my coach made me read is the big leap. Another one is think like a warrior by Donnelly. There's a few books with the same title. I'm a big believer in the secret, the book, the secret where what you manifest is what happens. So if you tell yourself I'm tired, I'm fat, I'm ugly, I'm never going to change. What's going to happen. You're tired. You're fat. You're never going to change. That's what's going to happen. So you have to really get up every day and give yourself self love. No matter how bad you feel, you have to sit there and say, I'm worthy, I'm beautiful, I've got this. Over and over and over and over until you believe it. And changing your mindset will change everything. The rest is easy once your mind is trained. Deadlifting. I'm deadlifting 170 pounds right now. That's a cakewalk. Compared to training my mind. So really work on your mindset, work on that self love and work on saying, I am worthy to put myself first and don't feel guilty or like you're some weirdo narcissist for putting yourself first. Because once you put yourself first, You are able to better take care of absolutely everyone else in your life. And you, through your actions, you are teaching your children how to behave. You're teaching your clients how to treat you. You're teaching your employees how to live. You're teaching all these people, wow, so that I can do that? You know, since I've done this, and I hope that my employees have understood this, you know, I have explained to them ad nauseum about boundaries. You know, if somebody emails you at eight o'clock at night is not your obligation to email them back. Your obligation is to yourself. Should you work between eight and five? Yes. After that, it is not your obligation. Your obligation is to take care of yourself, your family, fill yourself up, meditate, give yourself what you need to be whole, because those people don't care about you. Just because they had something to vomit into an email doesn't mean that you have to respond to it. So I think that it's really changed how everything has worked in my business. And I think it has helped my employees learn how to train their lives. And it has taught me how to better be a parent and a spouse and a daughter to everyone else because I'm so much more present in everything I'm doing in my life. And that all stemmed from putting myself first and taking care of myself. So it's a worthwhile investment. You get a great ROI. Don't feel guilty about it. Yeah, I totally agree. And I think once you get shore health, if you apply intention and discipline in one area of your life, the other areas of your life can't help. get better too. I really believe that. I mean, you learn skills and you can begin to apply those skills to other areas of your life. So it really is an amazing investment that you can make in yourself. And really, if you, it doesn't matter how much money you have, how successful you have, if you roll into 60, 70 without your health. I mean, those tools I bought when I took them in my Airstream, less than 200 worth of equipment, you know, and even today, like I hate Bulgarian split squats, like, Oh, I do too. So passionately my coach, my coach loves them. And so, you know, There's that time where you're getting ready to do them and you just want to complain, like, this is hard. I don't like this. And I think to myself, cause you know, I'm always trying to hold more weight as I'm doing them and I want to complain. And I'm like, I can't do 30 pounds in each hand. I can't, I can't do that. It's too hard. And I'm like. Shut up. You were 220 pounds at one point. Like you could hold literally 50 pounds in each hand. And it's the same as if you're doing this with your body weight. So, you know, don't forget that I, I mean, the other day I did calf raises, just body weight and my calves are screaming. I did a hundred of'em. She had me do five sets of 20. Today I can barely walk And that's just from my, my good old body weight Mm-hmm, So you don't need money, you just need drive. and ambition and the desire to actually better yourself. That's all you really need. And the rest is kind of a cakewalk. It sounds like what happened with you, but I always say get on the path. You have no idea how that path will branch, what opportunities will come your way, but if you get on the path, like it will all take care of itself. You just, you have to get on the path. No one can get on it for you. That, and let's not forget, you know, we've been living through a pandemic and we haven't heard anything about how health. plays a part in not dying from COVID or, you know, getting through it without a lot of problems. You know, make it an investment, like let this pandemic be a lesson that you got to get your house in order because you don't want something like that to take you down because you decided that wine and Starbucks And sitting in front of the television was more important. And now your kids are here without a mom. So, you know, use it as a lesson and take care of yourself. And, and I'm actually extremely grateful for COVID because if this hadn't happened, I would probably be here at 230 pounds. Yeah, I agree. I would not. I mean, I have a little bit different story, but I was a little bit different. I was a chronic dieter, scared to eat too much, and it did a number on my metabolism and a lot of other, I just had like chronic injuries that wouldn't heal, and I was in kind of a dead end job, and so I just kind of, enough was enough at some point, and I decided to make a change, and so I'm, I'm grateful. I mean, I had the, kind of the quiet time to be like, oh, this isn't the life I Wanted to be leading, so I made a change. Yeah, there's so much gratitude around that too, right? Like, Oh my gosh, I was able to change my life. You're now in this whole different life space that you're like, wow, I didn't think it would be this amazing. And so there's so much gratitude around that, that you're given basically a second chance. Yeah, I totally agree. Well, where can we find you and how can, um, I really encourage anyone who isn't following you to, to follow you, but where all can we find you and continue to be inspired by you? Well, basically I just live on Instagram with my story. So I'm not anywhere else on time for all the platforms. So it's this. phoenix. rising on Instagram. I tried really hard to show the good and the bad, the ugly. I talk about, like, it's not perfect. The journey is not perfect. Perfect. And there are hard days and there are struggles. And I share that and I share, you know, my day to day kind of routine and sometimes what I eat, but then it's like a flood of questions. Why did you have this instead of that? Because my plan is different than your plan because my metabolism is different than your metabolism, you know, it's hard, but I share as much as I can and I try to help. Women see that I'm not special, I'm not some kind of superhuman, I'm not special. I don't have like this perfect life at all. I'm just somebody who never gave up and I'm somebody who never cheated and somebody who never skipped a workout. I'm somebody who put myself first and you can too. You're just as special as I am. So that's what I try to show on there. No, you, you do show the good, the bad, the ugly. And so, and that's so appreciated. It's, we think that everyone just wants to see the perfect, you know, hologram of the life, but I mean, you have done so many women, such a service by showing your before pictures and showing yourself in the airstream doing those very hard workouts and not just, you know, the after picture on the stage and the bikini. So thank you for that. Oh, yeah. I think the number one question that I get that I really offends me is people are always like, so how did you have the downtime for the plastic surgery? Well, girls, number one, I am terrified of needles. I've never been put under in my entire life. And the only surgery I've had is a C section. And so I've, I've had zero cosmetic surgery, plastic surgery. I did not remove my loose skin. None of that. I don't photoshop my photos. I don't clean up my photos. It's what you see is what you get. And I know it's hard to believe that you can change your body and you can get rid of your cellulite and that, you know, your skin can actually tighten back up over time, but it is doable. So no plastic surgery here. Yeah. We, what we tell everyone is resistance training is the only non surgical way that you can change your body and your body shape and you can do it. It's amazing. So yeah, it is possible for everyone. Man, woman, young, old, everybody. Well, this has been amazing. Thank you so much. And I hope maybe you'll consider coming back again sometime and maybe right before your next show or after your next show, and we can continue the conversation. I do want to tell all of our listeners, like Trish said, you can get started even if you're You know, money is an issue. We host a monthly challenge every month and our booster metabolism after age 30 group next month in March, we'll be focusing on steps, taking a height and establishing the habit of getting, you know, a lot of movement in during your day, what we call non exercise activity, thermogenesis, and just becoming more active this month. We're focusing on strength training, stronger in 30 days. But those challenges are free and it's really our way of, of helping people integrate this lifestyle in a way that, that works for them. And then also we are not quite as hardcore as Trisha's coach, but we do offer, if you, if you're interested in getting in this journey and having someone help you calibrate the nutrition. The resistance training, the steps, the cardio, we will have openings in our program that begins in April, and you can go get on our wait list on our website. Details will be in the show notes. So thank you, Trish, so much. It's been an amazing conversation. Thanks for having me. I appreciate it. And I love that you guys are helping women everywhere. That's such a noble effort. So thank you for all you're doing. Yeah, it's very rewarding. So, okay. Thanks everyone. That's what we have for today. All right. Bye. That's what we've got for you today about how you can invest in your metabolism and start losing weight by eating more and exercising less. Trust us, you aren't too old and it's never too late. If you want to learn more about this topic, head over to our Facebook group Boost Your Metabolism After Age 30. You can also follow us on Instagram or Facebook at Couture Fitness Coaching. And if you want to work with us, join us for our next 12 week session.