It’s Not Too Late: Reclaiming Your Creative Life After 50 | Emily Pattullo EP 226

You can be outwardly successful, capable, and still feel like something essential is missing — often because a dream was quietly set aside along the way.

In this episode, I’m joined by Emily Pattullo — creative coach, author, and musician — who returned to music after 25 years and released her debut single at 52.

We explore what really keeps people stuck when it comes to creative confidence and personal growth: fear of judgement, conditioning that encourages us to stay small, and the inner stories we repeat that make us believe it’s “too late.”

Emily shares her Twelve Creative Steps to a Fulfilling Life — a simple but powerful journalling process designed to help you move from where you are now toward the life you actually want. We talk about how writing and drawing can help bypass overthinking, how breathwork can regulate the nervous system, and why reconnecting with childhood joy can reveal deeper purpose.

We also explore creativity in the age of AI, and why human intuition, expression, and discernment matter more than ever in a noisy digital world.

If you’ve been telling yourself your time has passed, this conversation offers a different perspective — one rooted in possibility, creativity, and courage.

Website: 12creativesteps.com

Website: 12creativesteps.com
Instagram: emilypattullo_
FB: Emily Pattullo Creates
12 Creative Steps to a Fulfilling Life book can be found on online as a beautiful hardback book at amazon and other book sites, or downloaded as a PDF from Emily’s website.
 A prerecorded online course of each of the 12 steps is on UDEMY course website (https://www.udemy.com/course/12-creative-steps-to-a-fulfilling-life/?referralCode=2C1B667C8B76F7F9B478).

If you are enjoying my work then you can support me by 'buying me a coffee' at this page  
I look forward to connecting with you Anita Mattu https://linktr.ee/AnitaMattu

Transcript

The Excuses That Block Dreams

Emily Pattullo 1:06

You go through the process of of finding out what's standing in the way of that, the people in your life, the the nemesis, the thing that the one thing that you tell everybody is the reason why you can't do the thing that you most want to do. Is it's usually because you can't afford it, because you've been told you have to do something else, because you grew up in an environment where you weren't allowed to speak your truth.

Anita Mattu 1:31

Today's guest is Emily Pattullo, creative coach, award-winning author, musician, creator of the 12 steps of a fulfilling life. Welcome, Emily. So much for having me. It's an absolute pleasure. So, with that said, what is one of the most courageous things that you have done?

Emily Pattullo 1:49

Probably isn't very significant to anybody else, but for me, courage is doing things I find scary uh for myself. So for me, something that I found really scary when I was younger was doing music, playing music in public and putting my music out there. And it's something I recently did, have done, have released a song, and for me, after what would have been 25 years avoiding doing it, it that's a big courageous deal for me.

Anita Mattu 2:21

Take us back to 25 years. What happened in your life when you were pursuing music in London?

Emily Pattullo 2:27

Well, I was in my late teens, and I'd started playing around with the guitar and writing songs, and I've always been able to

Emily’s Courage And Music Fear

Emily Pattullo 2:37

sing. So I just started doing it, and I had this burning desire to become a recording artist, become a musician, and so I took my guitar and myself and I moved from the depths of the English countryside up to London, where I got whatever job I could get and in the daytime and started playing in smoky bars in and around London just to get my music heard, to get myself out there. But apart aside from the the determination I had to write and sing and play music, I found the actual standing up in front of people and being in the limelight as it were terrifying. And so I did it a few times and then I found it too hard to bear, so I gave it up. Since then I have avoided doing music and avoid avoided doing anything to do with writing until the a few years ago when I landed in New Zealand and took it back up again and recently released the song 25 years later that I never released then.

Anita Mattu 3:52

Wow, how courageous is that! Thank you. You have openly shared that fear causes you to walk away from dreams. What fears were showing up for you at that time?

Emily Pattullo 4:05

It was really about being judged, it was about putting myself out there in front of people. When you create something, whatever that is, as it it's like standing naked in front of people and asking them to give their opinion on you and your heartfelt words and your voice and whatever it is that you choose to put out into the world. And in my at my that young age, I just found that very confronting.

Anita Mattu 4:38

At 52, you released your d debut single. What has that experience taught you about never being too late to follow your dreams?

Emily Pattullo 4:47

Well, I started exploring quite a few years ago now, uh what the point was of being here. And I decided quite early on that to get a nine to five job and a mortgage and those kind of everyday things, I need to retire and wait to die was really not what inspired me to be here. So I started to explore alternatives, you know, what actually is the purpose? Why am I here? What am I supposed to be doing? Um, like lots of people do at various points in their life. And and six years ago, I moved my family from the UK to New Zealand three weeks before the first lockdown. And that experience in itself, being introduced to a new country on the other side of the world, and in a time like that when everything was so uncertain, was like

Starting Again At 52

Emily Pattullo 5:44

the kick in the bum that I needed to just do those things that I've been put up putting off doing and never really had the confidence to do before because you just don't know what's com what's around the corner, do you? You never really know what's gonna happen. So that was kind of what pushed me into that. Yeah.

Anita Mattu 6:05

And that is courageous. I mean, the other side of the world, wow. Just taking off. What would you say to someone listening who believes they've missed their chance?

Emily Pattullo 6:15

I would like to encourage whoever it is that it's never too late. That if you have something that you desperately want to do, that I think it's really important to recognize that this life experience that we're here to have is meant to be a good one. It's meant to be a fun one and it's not meant to be hard. And if the thing that you most want to do is the thing that lights you up the most and fills your heart with joy and gives you purpose in this lifetime, then that's gotta be the reason why you're here. So I'd say go for it.

Anita Mattu 6:46

That's brilliant. I love that. So you are the author of the Twelve Creative Steps to a Fulfilling Life. What inspired you to create that?

Emily Pattullo 6:58

I created it because that was my experience going from who I was, who I was conditioned to be, as as society had decided, who I was conditioned to be and how my life looked on paper to how I wanted it to be and what I wanted to create for myself. And for me it's been a journey, and I know that to go from here to there is always a journey, and it's a bit like with the books that I've written to fictional novels as well. When you are taking your character of your book from the beginning of the story to the end of the story, they go on a journey, and they're never the same at the end of the journey as they are at the beginning of the journey, and they have to go through a transformation, and there's various things, challenges that they come up against, and things they have to deal with in order to alter and become

The 12 Creative Steps Journal

Emily Pattullo 7:55

something else. And so, because of my experiences writing stories in that way, I then wrote this journal, which is a 12-step journal that takes you people through the 12-steps that I believe it takes to get from your old life into the life you wish to live. And it starts out looking at your life and how it is, and and it asks you what you would like it to look like, and then we go through the process of finding out what's standing in the way of that, the people in your life, the the nemesis, the thing that the one thing that you tell everybody is the reason why you can't do the thing that you most want to do, is it's usually because you can't afford it, because you've been told you have to do something else, because you grew up in an environment where you weren't allowed to speak your truth, where there's a million different stories that people have for why they are the way they are and why they can't do the thing that they most want to do. So then the process takes you through that, looking at that, and out the other side, what do you what do you still need to clear from your cupboards, from the basement of your being in order to move forward? And that it's got various steps, and at the end you get to who you are now and and what does your new world look like? So it is taking people through a process that I spent many years putting myself through, hopefully, in a much more um approachable and practical way.

Anita Mattu 9:21

Well, someone hearing about it for the first time, what exactly is the 12 creative step process?

Emily Pattullo 9:28

So it is 12 steps, as the title suggests, and it takes people on a journey of self-discovery. So it starts at the beginning of your journey with what your life is like now, and then it takes people through the process of going from what their life is like now to what they'd like it to be like. So I get people to look at what their life is like now, and then what they'd like it to look like, and then what is standing in their way of that, and then there's various steps that look at the people in there in your life, uh, and what it is that that is the biggest thing that is standing in the way. What is the what is your greatest nemesis? What is the excuse you tell people about why you can't do the thing you most want to do? Is it because you think you're too old, that you don't have enough money, you have too many responsibilities, that you've been told that you're not good enough? All the many stories that we tell ourselves of why we can't do the things we most want to do. So it's coming up against that, confronting that biggest challenge and then moving through further steps to get to the point where you can re-imagine which is what you're doing, you're reimagining a life for yourself. And the fundamental part of the process and the the journal, because it's in journal format, is to write and draw your way through it. Because when you write and draw, you're accessing a different part of your brain, and by getting it down on paper in front of you, you are seeing it uh in down in front of you, and it's much easier to comprehend what it is that that your life looks like when it's down. And some people write, some people prefer to draw, you don't have to be particularly good either. It's literally just to get the brain to work in a different way and to and to give your sort of body and feeling self more of a uh uh a voice.

Anita Mattu 11:36

That's brilliant. I love that. So, why did you choose creativity as such a central part of the mythology?

Emily Pattullo 11:45

Because I'm a very creative person, because I've always journaled. I have a whole mass of journals that I always write in. I find it a really amazing way to organize my thoughts and to get the feelings down on on paper so that when I read it back, uh it it just changes changes my understanding of what I thought was going on. And and when you're writing, it's it's creating a flow of of of thought, thoughts you don't even know that you're really having, and it puts it down in front of you in a in a much more organized way. So I thought I found that for myself, it's a really good way to get a greater understanding of how I feel about things, and so I wanted to incorporate it in the process because that's what's really helped me.

Anita Mattu 12:37

That's really great, yes. And it is from our experiences that we can do things. Yes. You talk about creativity helping us to bypass that analytic mind. Can you explain what that means and why it's important?

Emily Pattullo 12:52

So when we're just thinking about things, we're running our mind in a in an analytical way, and we're processing old thought patterns and old ideas, and we're replaying them over and over and over again on a loop. And it can it can kind of cloud how we actually truly feel about something, and how we feel about something is is getting our body involved in the whole process. So we're not just from the neck up thinking, thinking, thinking, analyzing, uh uh trying to understand things from a sort of protective how we've always lived our life way, but we're accessing a part of our body that brings our feelings into the mix as well. So when we're writing and drawing, we're not just thinking from up here, we're bypassing that and we're going in at it from a different angle

Rewriting The Story Behind Self-Doubt

Emily Pattullo 13:49

or perspective, as it were, and and it involves feelings. And so when I'm working with clients, I if I tell them to, for example, take a look at their life now, and they write and draw it down on a piece of paper, they're very surprised by what that looks like compared to how they thought it was. It's it's it's just a very different perspective, and so when you access the feeling body versus the mental analytical mind, you find you've got two very different perspectives sometimes. And and it's easier to look at it from oh, I didn't realize I felt that way. Look like my life was okay. I've got the this and I've got that, and I've achieved this and I've achieved that, but I'm still kind of miserable. Why might that be? Why am I why am I feeling stuck? Why am I feeling unhappy? I've got all the things that apparently I was supposed to have to to you know experience the best life ever, but I'm still unhappy. And so that just helps people to access that part of themselves and understand it a little better.

Anita Mattu 14:56

Yeah, I can totally understand that. Being dyslexic myself, I'm very creative and right-brained. So, yeah, color, image, creative. Give me all of that. How does your process help people move beyond self-criticism and limiting beliefs?

Emily Pattullo 15:14

Uh the the steps that I get people to work through are trying to understand what is underneath the story. So the story that I mentioned before, the the nemesis, the thing that you go around telling everybody is the reason why you can't do the thing that you most want to do. There's a backstory, there's a past narrative that's going on in there about that you something that happened to you when you were a child, you're bullied at school, your parents neglected you, whatever your story, which is totally, you know, understandable and and and everyone has something that's happened to them. But generally, what it then does is people a reason why they can't do the uncomfortable, because they've been teaching their body and their nervous system that there's a certain way to be, and that's how they feel the safest and most comfortable, even if actually it's not the place they most want to be. So the steps get people to look at that. Who are the people in your life that perhaps haven't really got your back or aren't really supporting you and you're making making you feel less than? Um, what are the areas in your of your life where you are suppressing yourself, where you're not feeling heard, where you're not able to really be the person that you most want to be. So the ver there is various steps within the process that that um address these different points of people.

Anita Mattu 16:52

That's really great. Is there one step that people tend to struggle with the most?

Emily Pattullo 16:58

Sometimes there is a step uh that is about rewriting your story, so the narrative, so the excuse that you've been giving, the the the thing that has been standing in your way, the story that you've been telling. I ask people to rewrite that in a positive way. So one of the steps is to change, change the story that you've been telling people about why you can't do the thing you most want to do, and how can you put a spin on it, twist it round to being in your favor and for your benefit rather than being a victim of your circumstances? How can I change how I feel about a situation that happened to me when I was younger that made me feel like I didn't have a choice? How can I make that into something positive and come out of it as having achieved something really amazing and been really courageous as as you talk about, how can I make it that way? And and some people are so immersed in their in their the how something happened to them that it can be quite difficult to put a positive spin on it. But actually, if you can do that, if you can turn it around and recognize that that thing that happened to you happened in your favour because now look at who you are as a result, then you can move forward from there with um with a more kind of more purpose and a more positive outlook.

Anita Mattu 18:27

Absolutely love that. That's really thought provocing, and it's true. You can either live in the story or you can create another one that is better, that's going to be more fulfilling for you. What is one simple exercise listeners could start using today to reconnect with themselves?

Emily Pattullo 18:46

So it breath work is amazing. So just getting into the habit of breathing. And when I say breathing, it's very easy to say, and lots of people do, or take a deep breath and you'll feel better. But it's just as much about where in your body you're taking the breath. So breathing in the upper part of your body is what's called soldier breathing, and what it does is it activates the fight or flight mechanism within the body. So, what you want to do is you want to breathe in the lower part of your body, in your belly. And when you can start to practice doing that, you just put your hands on your belly and you feel it rise and fall and expand to contract as you breathe, a bit like blowing up a balloon. And that focused attention inside your body starts to connect you with your body, so that when you're doing the 12 creative steps, which also involves breath work and visualization, so that when you are going through

Breathwork And Listening To The Body

Emily Pattullo 19:46

the process, you are able to access these feelings that are arising around your life. Then these kind of breath work exercises just reconnect you with the body because lots of people are kind of living from the neck up and they've forgotten how useful this vessel that we're moving around is is and how much information it is actually giving us. So that's usually the first thing I get people to do is to get really familiar with breathing low in their body and in their belly so that they're reconnecting with that part of themselves.

Anita Mattu 20:20

Well, that's interesting because we only use a snippet of our body really instead of the actual potential we have.

Emily Pattullo 20:28

Yeah, yeah, true. And and lots of people have just kind of forgotten how important that is, and so part of the 12 steps as well is utilizing the body and really starting to listen to what it's saying, because it has a lot of things that it needs to say, and we got very good at pushing pushing it all down and getting on with our busy lives and actually not listening anymore.

Anita Mattu 20:49

Yes, I can understand that because life's so fast-paced, but actually slowing down. I'm always telling my clients, slow down. Yeah. If you slow down, you can hear yourself. Can you hear what you're saying?

Emily Pattullo 21:02

Absolutely, yes.

Anita Mattu 21:03

You often speak about stepping into our human potential. What does that mean for you?

Emily Pattullo 21:09

For me, uh as kind of as I mentioned before, it's it's realizing that I believe everyone came here with a purpose. I believe everyone came here with a gift, medicine, whatever you want to call it. And we kind of come here and we get all caught up and busy in how apparently we should live, and we forget about what how we want to live and and almost kind of what our mission here is. And so I think that if we can remember why we came within uh our lifetime, then we get an opportunity to have a far greater experience while we're here.

Anita Mattu 21:48

Yes, I agree with that. How can one begin discovering what their gift or purpose might be?

Emily Pattullo 21:56

I think that it is quite often um something that you really love doing as a child. That I think I often get people to think back to even if it's just something really little,

Purpose, Creativity And AI

Emily Pattullo 22:10

like I don't know, collecting ants in the garden or something, or maybe playing with dolls or something, it it gives you a little bit of an idea of of where your kind of passion lies, where what you love. And it doesn't have to be anything monumental, it doesn't have to change the world, it can just be something that brings you joy, lights you up, makes you feel like life is worth living. And and it and it can be just as simple as being really kind to people and connecting with them and helping someone across the road. I it doesn't have to be anything crazy. It could be teaching kids at a school and and and really helping kids to navigate this crazy world that we live in. I mean, there's a million different things, but the most important part of it is is. How it makes you feel. Because if everyone could be in the energetic vibration and space of who who they are when they're most filled with love and joy and purpose, if we could all be that way all of the time, then the world would be a very different place. So it's more about how you feel and less about how it looks from the outside.

Anita Mattu 23:34

I can totally understand that. And like you're saying, yes, having that fulfillment for one. Yeah. In a world increasingly influenced by AI and technology, why do you believe creativity is more important than ever?

Emily Pattullo 23:50

I believe that creativity is the one thing that humans can do that AI can't. Creating something from nothing, inventing something new, AI can regurgitate information that's already out there. It can't create from the heart and the soul, and it can't create with passion, and it can't do what I'm saying that people would do if they were doing the thing they most wanted to do and were filled with light and joy and love. And it it it's something that people emanate as they are doing it. And it's actually the process of creating that is more important than creation itself because of the frequency with which we operate when we're doing the thing we most want to do. And and and that is what impacts, I believe, what impacts the people, other people around you, and the people on the planet is doing that and being in that space, and AI can't do that. So whilst it's very useful in many, many ways, I like to think of AI as the servant and us humans as the master. And we get to spend more time discovering what it is that we want to do and what fills us with joy, and they get to do all the crappy jobs that no one wants to do, and I think that's the perfect way around, to be honest.

Anita Mattu 25:16

Yeah. It's about the heart and soul.

Emily Pattullo 25:19

Yes, exactly. It's the heart and soul.

Anita Mattu 25:21

What have been the biggest lessons you've learned about yourself through creating this work?

Emily Pattullo 25:27

Um, I think the biggest lesson is that it's an ongoing process. It's it's it's not a you go through the process, you get to the end, and everything's peachy. It is constant, it is ongoing, and it is a journey of discovery, of self-discovery. Um I think there's a real kind of ideology about how you the thing you wanna wanna do most, you rush to the end and you get it, and everything's perfect. I believe that the journey is is all part of it. And the more we can uh enjoy the journey and realize that that is actually the true purpose, it's not the destination, then we can have a much more authentic, fulfilled kind of experience because as you go along the journey, things reveal themselves. You you get to work through stuff that causes you problems, it is um an opportunity to work through things on in an ongoing way, and it gets better as you go along, you know, it's not like it it's hard all the time. But I think it's important to take to to enjoy the journey too.

Anita Mattu 26:41

Absolutely, and as you're involving every day, and it will get easier. It's about repetitive sometimes as well, taking that practical action. Yeah, yeah, true. What role has intuition played in your own journey?

Emily Pattullo 26:58

Very intuition-led. I've always been pushed back against what I've been told because it didn't feel right. Um, it's always been um a a part of what I was like when I grew up and and kind of ongoing that I don't like to be told that this is the way it is. I like to ask lots of questions and find out the truth for myself and and and and get a really good feeling for what I believe to be the truth rather than take someone's word for it. So I tend to use my intuition a lot because most of the time most people are not telling the truth.

Anita Mattu 27:38

And this day and age that you can just realize that every day in a moment really it shows up a lot now. And we are feeling getting better, absolutely.

Emily Pattullo 27:53

Yeah. I think we need our intuition more and more now because there's so much so much fakeness out there now. You really

Intuition, Discernment And What’s Next

Emily Pattullo 28:00

need to be discerning about what to believe and what not to believe, because you know, if you if you listen to everything that you're told as you're scrolling online or whatever, then you're gonna get all sorts of trouble. So it's better to really check in with what feels right for you.

Anita Mattu 28:17

I couldn't agree more. What are you most excited about in this next chapter of your life?

Emily Pattullo 28:22

Well, I have two teenage boys. They are one has finished recently finished school and one is has got a few more years left. So I'm well as much as I've loved their mum, I'm also looking forward to having a little bit more freedom. Perhaps traveling quite a bit more and being able to do what I do on the move and and and just keep helping people because this I believe this is a like the a really incredible experience that we get to have when we're down here, and I think lots of people have forgotten how amazing it can be, and to help people remember that for themselves is will be all part of what makes my life fulfilled too.

Anita Mattu 29:04

Sounds wonderful. And like you say, yeah, you know, we do our uh it's not even our bit, because it's never ending, but you'd like to have some of that time for yourself back. Absolutely.

Emily Pattullo 29:17

Yeah, absolutely totally, yeah.

Anita Mattu 29:19

If there was one key takeaway you would want every l listener to walk away with today, what would that be?

Emily Pattullo 29:25

I think probably just what I've been saying quite a lot, it is just that I believe there is more to this life than perhaps some of us allow ourselves to believe. And to get curious about what that might be for you is probably the best uh advice I can give.

Anita Mattu 29:44

So where can the listeners find you, Emily, online and your book?

Emily Pattullo 29:49

Uh I have a website which is 12creative steps.com. Um, I'm on Instagram, Emily Patalo underscore, and I'm on Facebook, and I have a song that is available to listen to, which is called Here as Love, and my artist name is Emily Clay. Um so yeah, I'm around.

Anita Mattu 30:14

And all the links for listeners will be in the show notes, so do please go ahead and connect with Emily. Thank you. Emily, thank you so much for sharing your insights, your wisdom, and your stories with us

Final Takeaways And Where To Find Emily

Anita Mattu 30:26

today. By doing so, you've impacted so many people and made it. I'd really like to acknowledge you for that and appreciate you being here. Thank you, Emily, for that.

Emily Pattullo 30:37

Thank you so much for having me on. I've really enjoyed that.

Anita Mattu 30:40

My pleasure. So we are all about Create the Courage to Be Fearless podcast here. What is your definition of courage?

Emily Pattullo 30:46

My definition of courage is doing the thing that for you is the most uncomfortable thing you could do that leads to something that fulfills you.