Solo - The Contrarian Mindset Skill 4: Embracing Uncertainty

"By challenging established fears and mindsets, we unlock the door to greater resilience, clarity, and the ability to thrive in life’s uncertainties."

In this Bite Size Fridays episode of It’s an Inside Job, Jason Liem dives into the fourth and final skill in the Mastering Self cluster of the contrarian mindset: embracing uncertainty. Jason explores why humans have an inherent drive for certainty and how the contrarian mindset equips us to face life’s unpredictability with resilience and strength. This episode provides practical steps to overcome our fears of the unknown, helping listeners build a life marked by courage, adaptability, and a sense of inner peace.

Key Takeaways:

1. Understanding the Need for Certainty:
   Jason explains the evolutionary roots of our need for certainty and how, while no longer essential for survival, this drive affects our modern lives. By redefining our relationship with uncertainty, we open ourselves up to growth and resilience.
2. Embracing Uncertainty as a Pathway to Growth:
   Success often requires venturing into the unknown. Rather than viewing uncertainty as a barrier, Jason reframes it as an opportunity for innovation, creativity, and self-discovery.
3. Practical Steps to Cultivate Comfort with Uncertainty:
   Jason provides actionable strategies such as setting flexible goals, practicing mindfulness, seeking diverse experiences, and building a supportive network. These steps help us move forward even when the outcome is unclear, reinforcing the contrarian principle of mastering self.

Episode Highlights:

• The Paradox of Certainty in Modern Life:
  Jason discusses how, despite providing comfort, an over-reliance on certainty can stifle personal growth. He encourages listeners to find a balance between routine and the courage to explore beyond the “castle walls.”
• Developing Resilience through a Learning Mindset:
  Facing uncertainty activates creativity, adaptability, and resilience. By viewing challenges as learning opportunities, we empower ourselves to navigate life’s inevitable ups and downs.
• Practical Tools for Embracing Uncertainty:
  Jason shares techniques to help listeners face uncertainty more comfortably, such as focusing on effort over outcome, practicing mindfulness, and seeking diverse experiences that push them out of their comfort zones.

Additional Resources:
Interested in building a contrarian mindset for resilience, fortitude, and psychological strength? Check out the other episodes in this series linked in the show notes, and subscribe to It’s an Inside Job for more insights on resilience, well-being, and personal growth.

Part 1 – Discover the Power of The Contrarian Mindset: A New Approach to Rewiring Your Brain for Resilience and Growth

Part 2 – Discover the Power of The Contrarian Mindset: A New Approach to Rewiring Your Brain for Resilience and Growth

Chapters

• 0:16 Welcome to Inside Job Fridays
• 1:44 Embracing Uncertainty
• 5:06 The Paradox of Certainty
• 8:02 Seizing the Moment
• 8:43 The Psychology of Uncertainty
• 11:12 Practical Steps to Embrace Uncertainty
• 13:26 Challenges of Embracing Uncertainty
• 18:09 The Power of Resilience

Transcript

[0:00] Music.

[0:08] Well, welcome to It's an Inside Job Bite Size Fridays, your weekly dose of resilience,

[0:13] optimism, and well-being to get you ready for the weekend. Now, each week, I'll bring you insightful tips and uplifting stories to help you navigate life's challenges and embrace a more positive mindset. And so with that said, let's slip into the stream.

[0:27] Music.

[0:34] Welcome back to the series on building the contrarian mindset now the contrarian mindset is about strengthening our resilience our tenacity our fortitude our psychological strength our ability to confront and meet uncertainty and the unknown especially when it shows up on our doorstep uninvited. And for those new to this series, what is a contrarian mindset? Well, contrarian thinking is not about being disagreeable or purposely going against the grain for the sake of it. It's about challenging the status quo of our minds. It's about questioning the usual ways you respond to life's challenges and exploring new, often unconventional paths to resilience and success. So these series of episodes invites you to think like a contrarian, not to complicate your life but to simplify it by cutting through the noise of common fears, dysfunctional thinking and unhelpful mindsets. So in total there are 12 skills to the contrarian mindsets and I have clustered them under three headings. So the first cluster four skills is mastering self, the next one is mastering perspective and finally it's mastering resilience.

[1:45] So in this episode we are gonna focus on the final skill of mastering self and that's the fourth skill embracing uncertainty.

[1:53] Music.

[2:03] I think a great starting point is to understand why each of us has this drive for certainty. Well, historically, the deeply ingrained human need or drive for certainty has been tied directly to our survival. In the face of life's unpredictability and uncertainties, our ancestors sought certainty to secure safety and to ensure continuity. This primal urge, while less about physical survival in today's world, still significantly influences our psychological well-being and our decision-making processes. The more straightforward our understanding of the world, the more confidently we can navigate it. However, the modern landscape of life, especially in the Western context, rarely presents the life-or-death scenarios our ancestors faced. Yet this evolutionary legacy does not diminish our search for certainty in our careers, relationships, personal goals, health. We equate certainty with comfort, a safe harbor from the stormy seas of life's unpredictability. Now the path to success is often uncertain, whether defined by professional achievements, personal milestones, or both.

[3:13] It's a terrain marked by question marks, where each step forward requires courage and a willingness to confront the unknown. Reflect on any successful individual's journey, possibly even your own, and it becomes evident that navigating uncertainty was not a barrier, but a catalyst for growth. We find resilience, innovation, and a drive to push beyond our perceived limits amid uncertainty. I mean, when I received my bad news, you know, that I talked about in the first episode of the series, it was literally a punch in the gut. It knocked me to my knees and it took me time to process emotionally the news. But once I processed, once I dealt with it and I framed that as neither good nor bad, but it was a wake up call.

[4:04] Well, then I got back up from my knees and I stood. And instead of walking deeper into the tide where the cresting waves kept knocking me over, as my father said, move back up on the beach and let the waves roll over your feet. And then I found the tenacity and the fortitude and the resilience and the robustness and the psychological strength to move forward, to face the uncertainty, to face the unknown that had shown up on my doorstep uninvited, unwelcomed. but there was.

[4:38] You know, when achieved, success brings a certain level of predictability and security. The once uncertain role becomes clear, lined with milestones of our achievement. Yet this uncertainty can be a double-edged sword. The comfort it provides also stifles growth, luring us into complacency.

[4:58] The challenge then becomes reaching a level of success and venturing beyond

[5:02] it, daring to risk the comfort we've found for the promise of new horizons. This may be professionally financially physically mentally psychologically and also our health now there's a paradox of certainty in modern life this paradox highlights a critical aspect of the human condition our drive for certainty at the same time once a survival mechanism it can constrain our ability to live genuinely the safety nets we create our routines our predictable paths well they can insulate us from the experience that enrich our lives recognizing this paradox is the first step towards breaking free of its confines toward choosing a life of growth over one of merely safety it's about understanding that while certainty provides comfort it almost limits our potential for growth and discovery it's like staying behind the castle walls because the castle walls protect us they're strong and sturdy but we never venture beyond the gates beyond the walls to explore the wilderness the environment around us which can add so much more dynamic and vibrancy to our lives the role of timing and the will to act.

[6:18] Waiting for the right moment to act is often an exercise in futility. Life rarely presents us with perfectly timed opportunities. Now, the contrarian mindset encourages us to seize the moment, carpe diem per se, to create opportunities for action rather than passively waiting for them. This mindset requires a departure from the comfort of certainty, embracing the discomfort of uncertainty and change. It's about being bold and making bold decisions, like changing careers, starting a business, moving to a new city, accepting the inherent risks, and to strive forward with purpose. An important caveat is distinguishing between wanting and willing. Now, there's a profound difference which exists between wanting change and being willing to enact it. Ideal desires often characterize the former, while the latter demands action. The contrarian mindset, well, it challenges us to move beyond mere wanting, confront the realities of our circumstances, and to take deliberate steps towards change we seek.

[7:32] This often means venturing into the unknown, embracing uncertainty with open arms, and accepting the inherent risk as part of the travel, as part of the road that we're on. It's about understanding that wanting change is not enough. We must be willing to take the necessary steps to make it happen. Those who turn their thoughts into actions and embrace the uncertainties of

[7:57] life as opportunities for growth and discovery earn admiration and respect from those around them. These individuals exemplify the essence of the contrarian mindset teaching us that courage is not the absence of fear but the resolve to move forward despite it in part two of this episode we're going to explore the implications of embracing uncertainty and how the contrarian mindset equips us to navigate the complexities of our contemporary modern lives with more resilience robustness psychological strength.

[8:33] Music.

[8:44] The decision to embrace uncertainty is a defining moment in personal development. It signifies a readiness to leave behind the familiar comforts of certainty for the potential that lies in the unknown. This leap, this step, this striving forwards, while daunting, is where actual growth begins.

[9:06] The contrarian mindset illuminates this process, showing us that growth is not a product of safe, predictable environments, but our capacity to thrive in uncertainty. It is a sojourn of empowerment, motivation, inspiring us to take control and agency and autonomy over our own growth and our development and our evolution as individuals. There is a psychology to uncertainty.

[9:35] Uncertainty activates deep psychological mechanisms within us it challenges our sense of control and confronts us with our limitations however it also opens the door to learning and adaptation when we step into uncertainty when we step beyond the castle walls when we engage our problem solving skills our creativity our and and adaptability innovative ways of thinking in ways that comfort and routine never demand this engagement isn't crucial for developing resilience a key attribute to the contrarian mindset champions resilience is about surviving adversity and using it as a springboard for growth and self-improvement it's a testament to our strength and determination in the face of uncertainty in the face of the unknown you know making peace with uncertainty involves a fundamental shift in perspective, it requires seeing uncertainty not as a threat.

[10:37] But as a natural and enriching part of the human experience. This shift at the heart of the contrarian mindset, which empowers us to view each uncertain situation as an opportunity to learn, grow, and to expand our horizons, to move beyond, to explore beyond the castle walls. It's about finding balance, recognizing that we cannot control every aspect of our lives. We can control how we respond to the challenges and opportunities that come our way.

[11:07] And this sense of control is empowering, putting us in the driver's seats of our lives. It's about agency and autonomy and influence. So what are some practical steps towards embracing uncertainty? Well, the first is set goals with flexibilities. Approach goal setting with openness to change. Define your objectives, but remain adaptable in how you achieve them. Allowing for detours and unexpected opportunities. In essence, kill your darlings. Understand that your desired outcome may not be the desired outcome. Maybe it's a permutation of that outcome.

[11:45] The second step, cultivate mindfulness. Practice being present in the moment. Be self-aware. Mindfulness helps us reduce anxiety about the future by focusing on the here and now, where we can act and make choices, like in step three, where we focus more on the effort and less on the outcome.

[12:07] A third step, seek diverse experiences. Look for new and challenging experiences. Regularly stepping out of your comfort zone builds confidence in handling uncertainty. It may be as simply finding a new route to work. Maybe it's finding a new coffee house. Maybe it's not always going to the same restaurant, but finding something new. Exploring a different part of town. What's another skill? Well, develop a learning mindset. with every experience, especially the difficult ones, as a learning opportunity. This perspective fosters resilience and a positive attitude towards life's unpredictability. Meaning, be curious, be inquisitive, try to understand what you can learn from this moment. It's not always easy, I'm not saying that, especially when we're hit hard and we're knocked down on our knees. But with time, when we get up the next day, when we wake up to the next week, then we can develop a more learning mindset and we can evolve from this. What's another skill? Well, build a support network. Surround yourself with people who embrace growth and change. Find a supportive community that can provide encouragement, advice, and different perspectives when facing the unknown and uncertainty.

[13:26] Now, I'm not going to kid you, there are challenges of embracing uncertainty.

[13:32] While embracing uncertainty is laden with potential for growth and self-discovery, it's not without its challenges. The road can often be bumpy, marked by periods of doubt, fear, discomfort.

[13:44] Recognizing these challenges is the first step towards overcoming them. There's also the fear of the unknown. And one of the most significant obstacles is the fear of stepping into that unknown. own. This fear can paralyze decision-making and hinder our ability to take risks. Overcoming this fear requires a conscious effort to trust in our own resilience and capabilities, reminding ourselves that every challenge presents an opportunity for growth. And how I did this in my darkest moments was to reach back into my past when I was also faced with some dark news, dark times, and how I overcome how i overcame them and that fed me that fueled me it gave me a hunger to move beyond the fear of the unknown there is also the discomfort with change change can be significantly uncomfortable when it disrupts our familiar routines and our expectations cultivating flexibility and openness to new experiences can help mitigate this discomfort practice such as mindfulness can anchor us in the present moments, in the here and now, making it easier to adapt to change with a sense of calmness and collectedness. And again, this is a skill like any other. The more you practice it, the more it will benefit you.

[15:05] Then there's the attachment to outcomes, you know, skill three in the last Bite Size episode. You know, it's about letting go of our attachment to specific outcomes which which can be no doubt particularly challenging especially when we have invested significant time and effort in them focusing on the process rather than the outcome well it can shift our perspective allowing us to find value and fulfillment in the travel on the road that we're on regardless of the destination then there's overcoming self-doubt, Doubts about our ability to handle uncertainty can undermine our confidence and deter us from taking action. And trust me, this is a normal reaction. Self-doubt is part of our mental makeup.

[15:52] But by building a support network of mentors, peers, and loved ones who encourage and believe in our potential, well, they can be instrumental in overcoming these doubts. Additionally, celebrating small victories along the way can boost our self-confidence, and it can reinforce our belief in our ability to navigate uncertainty and the unknown. Then there's analysis paralysis. The overwhelming nature of uncertainty can sometimes lead us to indecision. where we find ourselves unable to choose because we fear making the wrong decisions. We choke up. By setting small, manageable goals and taking incremental steps forward can help break the cycle of analysis paralysis. It helps us to build momentum and clarity with each action.

[16:42] You know, by acknowledging these challenges and actively seeking strategies to address them, well then we equip ourselves with the tools needed to navigate the complexities of uncertainty with greater ease and confidence. It's a testament to our capacity for adaptation and growth reinforcing the idea that while the path of uncertain may be fraught with challenges it's also ripe with opportunities for personal and professional development. The ultimate reward of embracing uncertainty is a life lived fully and gratefully. It's a life that values every experience for its outcome and the growth it facilitates. The contrarian mindset emphasizes accepting and navigating uncertainty. It doesn't just prepare us to deal with life's challenges and conundrums. It transforms our entire approach to living. We become more open to change, more resilient in the face of adversity, and more appreciative of the richness and diversity of the human experience, of those things that we truly value. And in my case, it's the friends, my kids, my family, where I live, who I know.

[17:56] In embracing uncertainty, we unlock our full potential, moving beyond the limitations of fear and self-doubt. We discover not just who we are, but who we can become.

[18:09] This journey, marked by continuous learning and adaptation, well, it's the essence of the contrarian mindset. It's a testament to the power of resilience, the value of curiosity, and the boundless possibilities that unfold when we dare to step into the unknown beyond those castle walls, this fourth fundamental play of the contrarian playbook this mastering self it offers more than a strategy for coping with life's uncertainties it presents a blueprint a map for a dynamic fulfilling and meaningful existence by embracing the paradox of certainty and venturing into the realm of uncertainty with courage and an open heart honestly we can truly begin to live a life without limits and exploring life's vast potential irregardless of how many days we have left on this planet.

[19:07] Music.

[19:12] If you're curious to know how to build a contrarian mindset for greater resilience, fortitude, tenacity, psychological strength, and a sense of well-being, well, you'll find the links to the other episodes in this series in the show notes. So make sure you hit that subscribe button and I'll be back next week with my long-form conversational episodes on Monday and the latest Bite Sites episode on Friday, and have yourself a relaxing and rejuvenating weekend.

[19:39] Music.