Solo - The Contrarian Mindset Skill 3: Letting Go Of Fixed & Desired Outcomes

In this Bite Size Fridays episode of It's an Inside Job, Jason White Birkevold Liem explores the third skill of the contrarian mindset—letting go of fixed outcomes and focusing on our actions and efforts. Jason delves into how this principle empowers us to live authentically and fully, embracing life’s uncertainties with grace. By emphasizing effort over outcome, we build resilience, develop a growth mindset, and find fulfillment in the journey rather than just the destination.

Three Key Takeaways from This Episode:

1. Effort Over Outcome as a Mindset Shift:
   Jason discusses how valuing the process over fixed outcomes allows us to approach life’s challenges with a resilient and adaptable mindset. By focusing on our actions rather than the results, we can better navigate the unpredictable nature of life.
2. Fostering Resilience and Adaptability:
   The contrarian principle of focusing on effort cultivates resilience and fortitude, enabling us to face setbacks with courage and tenacity. This approach ensures that we remain open to possibilities even in adversity.
3. Living with Intentionality and Gratitude:
   Jason emphasizes that focusing on the journey and the effort itself enhances our appreciation for life. Living with presence, authenticity, and gratitude enriches our experience and creates a ripple effect that positively influences those around us.

Episode Highlights:

• The Contrarian Mindset of Letting Go of Fixed Outcomes:
  Jason introduces the idea that focusing more on effort and less on specific outcomes allows for greater flexibility and inner peace, fostering an empowered approach to challenges.
• Personal Reflections on Effort Over Outcome:
  Drawing from his personal journey, Jason shares how this mindset has helped him confront recent life challenges, fueling a positive and optimistic outlook.
• Practical Steps to Apply Effort Over Outcome:
  Jason encourages listeners to celebrate small wins, find satisfaction in taking meaningful actions, and approach setbacks as opportunities for growth.
• Impact Beyond Personal Growth:
  By embodying this principle, we can inspire others, creating a ripple effect that promotes resilience and adaptability in our communities and workplaces.

Additional Resources:
Interested in building a contrarian mindset for resilience, fortitude, and psychological strength? Check out the other episodes in this series linked in the show notes, and subscribe to It’s an Inside Job for more insights on resilience, well-being, and personal growth.

Part 1 – Discover the Power of The Contrarian Mindset: A New Approach to Rewiring Your Brain for Resilience and Growth

Part 2 – Discover the Power of The Contrarian Mindset: A New Approach to Rewiring Your Brain for Resilience and Growth

Chapters

• 0:16 Welcome to Inside Job Bite Size Fridays
• 1:57 Embracing Unpredictability in Life
• 7:47 Cultivating Presence and Self-Awareness
• 10:32 Living Authentically and Intentionally
• 12:33 The Journey Over the Destination
• 14:09 Building a Contrarian Mindset

Transcript

[0:00] Music.

[0:08] Well, welcome to It's an Inside Job Bite Size Fridays, your weekly dose of resilience,

[0:13] optimism, and well-being to get you ready for the weekend. Now, each week, I'll bring you insightful tips and uplifting stories to help you navigate life's challenges and embrace a more positive mindset. And so with that said, let's slip into the stream.

[0:27] Music.

[0:34] Welcome back to the series on building the contrarian mindset now the contrarian mindset is about strengthening our resilience our tenacity our fortitude our psychological strength our ability to confront and meet uncertainty and the unknown especially when it shows up on our doorstep uninvited. And for those new to this series, what is a contrarian mindset? Well, contrarian thinking is not about being disagreeable or purposely going against the grain for the sake of it. It's about challenging the status quo of our minds. It's about questioning the usual ways you respond to life's challenges and exploring new, often unconventional paths to resilience and success. So these series of episodes invites you to think like a contrarian, not to complicate your life, but to simplify it by cutting through the noise of common fears, dysfunctional thinking, and unhelpful mindsets. So in total, there are 12 skills to the contrarian mindsets, and I have clustered them under three headings. So the first cluster of four skills is mastering self. The next one is mastering perspective. And finally, it's mastering resilience. So in today's show, we are going to focus on skill three of mastering self. And that skill is letting go of fixed and desired outcomes. It's about focusing

[1:55] more on actions and efforts. So let's get to it and slip into the stream for this week's episode.

[2:01] Music.

[2:08] As we travel the ups and downs of life with a contrarian approach, we learn the art of letting go of fixed outcomes and embracing life's unpredictable nature with grace and equanimity. Now, this mindset enhances our personal growth and well-being, setting a powerful example for those around us and creating a ripple effect of positivity and resilience. Mastering effort over outcome empowers us to live authentically and thoroughly, making the most of every moment and embracing life's infinite possibilities. You know, the journey towards mastering effort over outcome as advocated by the contrarian mindset, well, it invites us to engage more richly and thoroughly with life. It encourages us to value the process over the product, to live with openness and adaptability, and to cultivate a deep sense of presence and gratitude. Now, this approach is not merely about achieving goals. It's about experiencing the profound satisfaction, fulfillment that comes from living in alignment with our deepest values and truths. Through this perspective, every challenge becomes an opportunity for growth, every setback a lesson in resilience, and every success a moment to reflect on the journey that led us here.

[3:24] Now, adopting this mindset requires a deliberate shift in how we perceive and react to the world. It involves a continuous process of self-reflection, where we examine our attachments to specific outcomes and gradually learn to release them. This doesn't mean abandoning our goals or aspirations, but rather approaching them with a flexible mindset, ready to adapt our path as circumstances evolve. Focusing on effort rather than outcome cultivates a life of purpose and intention. It encourages us to invest our energies into actions that align with our core values, to engage deeply with the tasks at hand, and to find fulfillment in the act of doing, irrespective of the results. This way of living enriches our experiences, deepens our relationships, and imbues our existence with a sense of meaning and direction. Moreover, this contrarian principle teaches us the importance of resilience, tenacity, and fortitude. In a world that often equates success with specific achievements, with specific outcomes, learning to value effort and adaptability, well, it prepares us for life's inevitables, ups, and downs. It builds an inner strength that allows us to face adversity and challenges with courage and boldness and to emerge from challenges with a deeper understanding of ourselves and our capabilities.

[4:51] The mastery of effort over outcome also fosters a profound sense of gratitude. By appreciating the travel, the journey, the sojourn, as much as the destination, well, we open our hearts to the beauty and richness of the present moment. Now, this gratitude enhances our well-being, increases our happiness, and strengthens our resilience, creating a virtuous cycle that enriches our lives and the lives around us. You know, ultimately, the contrarian approach to focusing on effort over outcome is a testament to the power of perspective. It challenges us to see beyond the surface of success and failure, to embrace the inherent uncertainties of life, and to find joy and purpose in the journey itself, in the sojourn itself. You know, this perspective is a strategy for navigating life's challenges, its conundrums, its pitfalls, its uncertainties. And it's a profound philosophy for living more deeply, more presently, more fully. As we continue this journey in this special series on the contrarian mindset, and we are armed with the insights and principles of this mindset, we're going to discover that the accurate measure of our lives is not found in the outcomes we achieve, but in the effort we exert, in the actions we execute, the resilience we build and the joy we find in every moment.

[6:12] Now, this realization is the key to a life of fulfillment where every effort counts, every moment matters, and every journey, no matter how winding, is cherished. You know, with my own challenges that I spoke of in the first episode of this series, you know, it's so easy for my mind to go to the outcome, where I need to be. And that's important, irregardless, that is important to focus on outcome. But I only want to spend 20% of my time because I want to have a clear picture as the direction, the orientation.

[6:44] But there's so many variables in play that I can't just focus on the outcome. I need to take 80% and that's what I've decided for myself. 80% of my effort and action, my attention goes to what I can do in the here and now, what I can control, what I can influence. And by doing that, that slowly builds my confidence that I'm building, I'm taking one step forward each day. Now, as we continue to explore the essence of focusing on effort rather than outcome, a cornerstone of the contrarian mindset, this third skill of mastering self, where we're going to delve deeper into its application and its impact it holds for personal and professional development, for resilience and a sense of fulfillment, a sense that we have agency and autonomy over our lives, irregardless of the challenges that life throws at us.

[7:42] Now, this principle, it emphasizes the process over the product. It invites a richer, more dynamic, more nuanced engagement with life, encouraging a shift in perspective that values presence, adaptability, and intentionality in every moment.

[7:58] Music.

[8:08] By valuing striving learning evolving when we foster a mindset of continuous improvement this perspective encourages us to celebrate small victories and learn from setbacks viewing each as an integral step in our development in our growth in our evolution as individuals. It liberates us from the shackles of perfectionism and the fear of failure, allowing us to take risk, to embrace challenges as opportunities for growth. You know, this impact inspires us to strive for our best self. Now, it's important when I, as we explore these different skills, to incorporate skills that we've already addressed. You know, in a world that is rife with uncertainty, with sometimes the unknown, The ability to focus on what we can control, our efforts, our attitudes, and our responses, well, they become a source of strength. This approach cultivates resilience, enabling us to bounce back from adversity quickly.

[9:13] By detaching from specific outcomes, we become more adaptable, ready to pivot and find creative solutions when faced with unexpected challenges that show up on our doorstep uninvited. This flexibility ensures that we remain open to life's myriad possibilities even in the face of change or disappointment or really bad news sometimes you know central to the contrarian mindset something that i've discovered is cultivating presence through self-awareness it's cultivating gratitude because each of this the the presence the awareness and the gratitude dude, it literally enriches our life experience. Now, by focusing on effort and fully engaging in the present moment, well, we deepen our appreciation for the sojourn, for the journey, for the travel, finding joy in the act of doing rather than solely achieving.

[10:12] You know, this present-centered living enhances our sense of fulfillment as we learn to appreciate the beauty and richness of life, celebrating both the mundane and the extraordinary. You know, adopting the principle of focusing more on effort over outcome,

[10:29] well, it empowers us to live more authentically and intentionally. It shifts our focus from external validation to internal satisfaction, aligning our actions with our core values and our authentic selves. This alignment fosters a life of integrity where our daily choices reflect who we are and what we stand for. Living with such authenticity and intentionality, well, it brings a profound sense of purpose and satisfaction. It's strengthening our connection to our values and our beliefs. And as we navigate this road that we're on with more clarity and more conviction and more confidence. By focusing our effort over outcomes, it has far-reaching effects beyond personal growth.

[11:18] It influences those around us. It creates a ripple effect of positivity, of constructive mindset, of empowering others too. You know, by embodying this principle, We inspire others to adopt a similar mindset, fostering a culture of resilience, adaptability, and mindfulness. This collective shift, it can transform relationships and communities and workplaces, promoting a more supportive, compassionate, and purpose-driven environment. The mastery of effort over outcome, as outlined at what I call the contrarian mindset, is not merely a strategy for facing life's challenges, but it's a holistic philosophy for living, something that I have practiced since I received my news of what I need to challenge as a person, as an individual. It calls us to engage fully with life, embracing the moments with openness and gratitude and intention. This approach transcends the pursuit of specific achievements, offering a path to a deeper, more meaningful existence.

[12:33] One that is marked by personal growth, resilience, and a profound sense of fulfillment.

[12:40] Unfortunately for me, it took a wake-up call of bad news to awaken this. But you know what? I'm actually thankful for the news because what has happened to me is neither good nor bad. It's just what the cards that life has dealt me at this point in this stage of my life. And the question is, how do I show up to play those cards? Am I constantly focusing on just the outcome? Or do I focus on what I can control, what I can influence? Can I focus on effort and action? And I can tell you from my own experience, this is what fuels my constructive, positive, and optimistic outlook, the contrarian mindset. By embracing the principle of focusing on effort more than outcome, we commit to continuous learning and adaptation. We recognize the true satisfaction lies not in the destination, but in the journey. You know, it's an invitation to live more fully, to cultivate presence and gratitude and to make the most of every opportunity, regardless of the outcome. By focusing on effort and embracing the present, well, we unlock the door to more prosperous, rewarding life filled with positivity, growth and contentment, irregardless of the factors that we may face as individuals in our own lives.

[14:04] Music.

[14:10] If you're curious to know how to build a contrarian mindset for greater resilience, fortitude, tenacity, psychological strength, and a sense of well-being, well, you'll find links to the other episodes in this series in the show notes. So make sure you hit that subscribe button. And I'll be back next week with my long-form conversational episodes on Monday and the latest Bite Sides episode on Friday. And have yourself a relaxing and rejuvenating weekend.

[14:37] Music.