Turkeys, Traditions, and the Power of Thanks

Join Shane and Tonya for a special Thanksgiving week episode as they share heartfelt reflections on gratitude, holiday traditions, and the power of building meaningful relationships in business and life. From turkey, dressing, and football rivalries to showing appreciation for carriers and clients, this episode is packed with insights to fuel your agency’s success! 

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Transcript

Announcer: [00:00:00] This is IA Forward, your playbook for success as an independent insurance agent. Here to help you knock it out of the ballpark are your hosts, Shane Tatum and Tonya Lied.  

Tonya: Welcome to IA Forward and happy Thanksgiving week to all of our amazing listeners.  

Shane: Holiday season has been kicked off in our house for a month already, but it's the official kick off of holiday season. 

And I have these scenes in my brain that just turkey dressing, it's surrounded by food. And I know it's all from part of family and growing up in my family, but also it's from the scenes on the movies that I watched as a kid, from A Christmas Story, Charlie Brown, Thanksgiving. I love turkey. For a long time as a kid, we did turkey at every holiday, like even Easter. 

Tonya: We still do that. Maybe that's a southern thing that you do turkey for all the holidays.  

Shane: My aunt made Dressing she makes incredible dressing. It was just turkey [00:01:00] dressing ham Purple hull peas mashed potatoes. Those are the things that were staples at every Major holiday forever maybe except for summer months. 

It's like we did it at thanksgiving. We did it at christmas We did it easter. I want to say we even did it at mother's day For the longest time it's like how many turkeys are we gonna eat and it was great now. It was incredible fun memories It's just I didn't realize it was maybe a little odd And maybe it is just a Southern thing, until Julie and I got married, and then she started realizing that we did turkey and dressing on every holiday, and she just brought it to my attention. 

I was like, is that weird? Is that strange? Because it's my life, but now that I think about it, it is weird that we do it that many times a year.  

Tonya: We do it that many times a year too, so I think it must be a Southern thing, or maybe it's an East Texas, Louisiana thing, I don't know. But I do look forward to it, and I look forward to all the things, and my mama's chicken and [00:02:00] dressing, there is nothing like it. 

And for our listeners up north that do stuffing, I'm going to use Shane's favorite quote, you do you. But if you ever come down south and have chicken and dressing, you're never going to want stuffing again. I'm just saying. Now Daniel's family does oyster dressing. And I have learned to supplement my mama's cornbread dressing with this very East Coast oyster dressing thing. 

And I have learned to appreciate oyster dressing, but it's still not my mama's chicken and dressing. They're just, they're not even the same dish. at all whatsoever. I just, I consider the oyster dressing as more of an appetizer.  

Shane: Food is so amazing because it's so cultural. Just like that, oyster dressing. 

I've never had that. I don't even really know what it is, but I love the fact that All over the country, there's different food. Food takes us back to memories. If I sit down and eat my Aunt Kay's dressing, [00:03:00] I'm going back to a place in time, as maybe a kid at times. If I mix my purple hull peas with my grandmother's mashed potatoes, I'm immediately transported back to memories. 

Food takes us places and really is amazing because Food takes us Other people's cultural food, things, trying different things. I'm much better as an adult, even an older adult now, than I was as a kid. Like, I would never have tried oyster dressing. But like, I would love to try it.  

Tonya: When you were talking about the movies and these images that are created. 

The one that popped up in my mind about the turkey was from Christmas vacation, where they go to cut in the turkey and the turkey is so dry that it completely disappears.  

Shane: Just a little dry. The true national pastime of the man is sitting around quoting movie lines from your teenage years. That's all my friends and I did. 

Cousin Eddie, save the neck for [00:04:00] me, Clark. Those lines are just going to live forever and we can never let them die. If we do anything. Over the next century, we have to sit around and continue to quote those and make sure that the next generation, the future generations understand how important sitting around and quoting movie lines are. 

Tonya: I can probably do the same for all of the girl movies, Dirty Dancing and Grease and Meet Me in St. Louis and. White Christmas, I'm so excited this year that theaters are showing White Christmas on the big screen because it's a big anniversary. So, I will be doing that both nights that they will be showing White Christmas at the, at the movie theater because I love to go see traditional classic movies on the big screen the way they were intended instead of on our little screens. 

In our living rooms, which aren't so little anymore, but it's still different being in front of that silver screen and seeing those movies the way they were shot to love, love, love that Thanksgiving week gratitude. [00:05:00] Let's talk about the importance of gratitude. As fuel for long term success, I really see the role of gratitude in building sustainable relationships and how gratitude strengthens partnerships and employee morale and customer loyalty and all of the things ultimately comes down to gratitude. 

Shane: Gratitude is just a natural positive trait, being thankful, having gratitude for what you do and how you get up every day. I talk about attitude being a choice, especially as business owners, agency owners, leaders in our communities, people will feed off of our negative energy, our positive energy. And if we're not grateful. 

Then others around us may tend to be less grateful. That's miserable. It's really miserable and leads to Entitlement one of the things that comes to [00:06:00] mind for me and this has never happened for our organization But years and years ago my dad our founder Started giving a christmas bonus and the christmas bonus Was just an extra pay period everybody was paid weekly things were different And it just was an extra week's pay. 

It wasn't a percentage of salary. It wasn't based on any kind of success, metrics, merit. It was just because today we continue that the really amazing thing that I would say about our organization and our people is I've never sent that they do have the expectation, even though they probably have an expectation, like I'm guessing that if I may Employee of Integra and I am doing Christmas shopping that I know that I'm going to get the Christmas bonus coming in to my account and that's going to help me buy Christmas or it's going to help me do whatever like I get that as the owner. 

I get that. [00:07:00] It does the same for me. I get a Christmas bonus because I'm also an employee. It's this ability to keep That from becoming expected and having gratitude for it, that it is very real for me. It's very real for employees of our organization because it could very much turn into this entitlement thing. 

Never once that I can remember, have I ever had someone say. Are we going to get a Christmas bonus this year?  

Tonya: Oh my gosh, I can't even imagine. That bonus comes with a level of gratitude from everyone that I have ever seen on our team because it's a rarity to get that kind of Christmas bonus in the world right now. 

It is a huge rarity. You have such tremendous long term employees. Like, it's crazy to be with an organization. For seven years. Like I have been with yours and be the newbie.  

Shane: That's different than a lot of [00:08:00] organizations across the world. I get it. Never once has someone asked if we're getting it. Never once has someone asked when we're getting it. 

To my knowledge, I'm thinking about Christmas vacation. He's sitting around waiting on his Christmas bonus. Cause he's got to put the deposit on the pool. Clark is, has gone out on a limb. And he's, he gets the jelly of the month club. That's his bonus that year. I just think about this in terms of, I'm grateful that I am surrounded by people and have been fortunate to employ people over the years who have never reached the point of that level of entitlement or expectation. 

It started with my dad wanting to give a gift. And the best thing he knew to give was compensation at a time of year where it's probably a little extra that helps. It's one of the things that comes to mind, and it's a huge amount of gratitude. And I say that because we normally do that right after Thanksgiving, that first pay period in December. 

So it's very relevant to Thanksgiving week because we're generally [00:09:00] getting ready to do that bonus. Giving's always better than receiving, as cliche as that is, especially as you get older. There's really nothing that my family can buy me. I'm that guy now. Don't buy me anything, because everything needs to be really about giving at this point. 

Tonya: What I want for Christmas stresses me out. at a crazy level with my parents and my birthday is the same way. It's what do you want? What do you want? I'm like, I don't want anything. I don't want stuff. It's all about giving and it's all about experience for me. So let's do something together. Let's plan an event. 

Let's go on a three day mini vacation. Let's everybody be nice to each other. To me at this point, it's so much more about the experience, but for some reason people want to buy stuff for me. And I'm like, I don't need, I have everything on the planet that I could ever need at this point. I do appreciate when the cute boy finds me a little [00:10:00] sparkly something from the antiquarian jewelers. 

in Gulf Breeze, Florida? Yes. But do I need that? No. Like it's just not a, it's not a need thing. I guess that's what Christmas is about is people finding these really wonderful gifts for you. And I'm a gift person and you know this and I love to find Those unique, happy, wonderful gifts for people. And I look for things year round. 

So when I see something that says, Oh, that reminds me of Shane, then I'm going to pick it up and grab it. But I don't like the idea of I have to buy something for somebody in November, in December, because it is Christmas and I have to buy it now. That's the one thing that drives me crazy.  

Shane: This gift thing is real. 

I'm with you here. I'm with you here. My wife is very similar to you in that way and that she's very thoughtful throughout the year and it makes me Jealous furious if that can be combined like i'm not mad at her like i'm mad at [00:11:00] myself I'm furious and jealous envious that I do not have that trait, but she will see something in May or june And it'll be like, Oh, that'd be perfect for Shane's stocking. 

I'm scrounging for the stocking on Christmas Eve. Like I'm that guy. And she's been working on the stocking since December 26th of the previous year. So envious, furious at myself and just this reality of that. Let's get better. Let's make this a goal. What do we need to be working on in the last month of the year? 

Let's be more thoughtful. This is a good thing that I've been actually trying to work on for several years. Just personal improvement is to just be more thoughtful. It's taken me a long time to have any thoughtfulness whatsoever when it comes to a little gift or a little something or flowers or you're like the fresh flower girl. 

Tonya: Yes. There's three bouquets of fresh flowers in our house right now.  

Shane: Yeah. So not [00:12:00] surprising. She did it. She has a florist, too, by the way.  

Tonya: I do, but all the first flowers are in my house. Either I arrange them or the cute boy arranged them for me.  

Shane: So she is a florist, and she married a florist. We have a florist next door to the office. 

Thank goodness I've known her my entire life. And she saves the day every year. But I learned a few years ago, That buying some flowers two or three times leading into Christmas really lifts the spirits in the house. And that was my thoughtfulness increase measure several years ago.  

Tonya: There's an attorney in Monroe, Louisiana that for as long as I can remember at mom's law office, he would always send a huge Poinsettia to every single member of mom's staff. 

And this attorney did this with all of the attorneys in town that he worked with. Not only would he send a gift, he would [00:13:00] always send a gift certificate to my mom for a local shop, but he acknowledged every staff member With this big, red, glittered poinsettia. It wasn't just a poinsettia, it was a glittered poinsettia. 

My first thought was always, Oh my gosh, what does this cost? But now looking back on it, thinking about when he would call and need something, every member of mom's staff would put his request at the top of the list because he sent a poinsettia at Christmas. Now, Is that why he did it? Probably. But it also showed this level of gratitude for their work. 

So it was very symbiotic in its usefulness. Could everybody do this? No, because I don't really know what his bill was at that particular florist, but it had to have been substantial. The gratitude was felt because it was so delightful, and it wasn't just the [00:14:00] owner of the business, it was done for the staff. 

Shane: Yeah, I'm having, like, these thoughts of agents and underwriters. So, the age old battle, can't live with them, can't live without them, is the Underwriter to agent to underwriter relationship. You've got sales, you've got underwriters with trying to make sure they're pricing the risk. In situations, this is probably going to lean a little more commercial lines, but in situations where you have dedicated underwriter, it's going to be some investment. 

The first thing that popped into my head is what would be our equivalent? It would be agents sending a nice something to their underwriter. Companies have done this over the years pretty well with agents, especially high producing agents. There's several podcasts about me talking about the stakes that I got from this one particular company, and then they stopped sending the stakes and I missed the stakes. 

When the stakes weren't there anymore and they were no longer coming in, I had to buy my own steaks.  

Tonya: [00:15:00] Whoever sent him the steaks, please send Shane some steaks and steak knives. Please! Whoever sent the steaks, if you will let me know where the steaks came from, I will send Shane some steaks and steak knives. 

It  

Shane: comes up every year around this time. But seriously, what underwriter wouldn't appreciate and remember you as an agent if you did this? You cannot just do this. You gotta mean it. I really understand that this attorney. was doing this for a little bit of ulterior motive there. But you don't spend that kind of money without having a heart. 

There's gotta be a heart message behind it. It can't be like, I sent you this gift around the holidays, and that's why you need to approve this wrist for me. That's not gonna work. So let's not go too far with this thought. But we don't do that very well as agents. We're the salespeople. And the companies generally market to us, and they generally pamper us. 

How much are we pampering them? Let's turn this around a little bit. Are we pampering them at [00:16:00] all? Are we being thoughtful at all with our biggest carrier partners? They're very important, and if anything, the last two years have taught us how important our carrier relationships are. And there's a lot of carrier agent relationships that have been severed. 

Over these past two years, as this market cycle has gone, and there's a lot of agent carrier partners that have strengthened through this cycle. Hard times really let you know who your friends are. That goes both ways. Agents, are you doing your part? Carriers, are you doing your part? This is a time. Where we should be very thoughtful about that type of situation and I'm glad you brought that up. 

Do you want your app to go to the top of the pile? Do you want that underwriter to take your call? Oh, it's Shane calling. Yeah, it's Mr. Flower Guy. I'm taking that call. Every time. If I'm busy or not. There's a lot here that goes with this that we forget because we get used to it. One [00:17:00] story of forgetfulness and just catching myself is that in some of that pampering, carrier to agent, I was on a carrier reward trip that was around Olympic themes. 

This particular company was an Olympic sponsor. It was an awesome trip of about 12 agents. They took us to Aspen during the Winter Olympics, and there were Olympians, former Olympians there, and we got to eat dinner with them. It was like over the top. It was  

Tonya: amazing. Yeah, it was  

Shane: over the top bougie stuff. 

We're there. We're doing all this stuff for a week. I didn't pay for anything. And we get home and we go eat at lunch. I had almost been pampered. To a level of conditioning that I almost walked a check when I got home, not that you have to spend money on me to for me to show gratitude, but it was like when I'm in the moment, I'm amazed. 

But then after the fact, and I look back at what that insurance company did for me, for us as an organization. It was like, [00:18:00] holy cow. That was a lot. I had such a sense of gratitude for that week when I got home and I'm like, back in normal life. And I'm like, wow, that was amazing.  

Tonya: This is really an incredible season starting this week. 

Even just a message of gratitude can strengthen relationships, can reopen doors as we're getting ready for the new year, especially with people that you don't engage with regularly, but that are imperative to your agency, thinking about clients, mentors. Underwriters, your, your partners, all of the things, yes, you're going to send them a Christmas card. 

I get it. You are or a New Year's card or whatever, but just those few extra moments beyond that to connect makes all of the difference to them. And it can make all the difference to you. But these last two years or 11, 963 days of [00:19:00] this market, They have been tough. They really have. But what happens if we actually go into this season almost with an attitude of gratitude towards it? 

Because this hard market season has created growth within our agencies. It has resilience, because it's been bad. Let's just say it's been bad. And for the agents that have looked at this as opportunity, and for the agents that have seen this as a season of making their agency stronger, looking at that with gratitude as we come out of it, It's an amazing opportunity for adjustment as we set intentions for 2025 and beyond. 

Shane: It has been hard. There's been a lot of conversations with clients, upset clients. I've said through this cycle of hugging an account manager. An insurance carrier, marketing rep, [00:20:00] the brunt of conversations have not been pleasant, even to the point of firing some customers that were just out of line. 

That's hard for a salesperson, but it's been a difficult time and we capped it off with another election cycle. It's a perfect storm. I feel like we're weathered for survival of anything that comes at us. You have. At this point, play the infinite game, you're still here, you're still going, and I really believe we're at the tail end of this, and there's going to be some improvement in stable, continued stabilization, and more stabilization, depending on what state you're in, and depending on regulatory environment, and the litigation that's out there, there's some patches of this stuff, but Overall, for all intents and purposes, you've made it through the hard part, and I really believe that. 

We have no reason to not have a tremendous amount of gratitude and think about, Okay, [00:21:00] let's go. Let's go to another level. We've weathered this storm. We've done it. And so I get pretty excited about that. When I talk to different agencies, I hear that improving tone in their voice. That wasn't necessarily the case a year ago. 

There were agents that I was getting calls like I'm thinking about getting out after being in the insurance business for 15 years. That's how hard it was. And they stayed in and they weathered the storm. And now they're looking back going, wow. Look at where I'm at. I'm in a better place. I'm stronger. My people are stronger. 

Mental toughness. Woo. Well, you had to have had some mental toughness over the last 18 to 24 months.  

Tonya: Thanksgiving week, one of my very favorite weeks of the year beyond food, beyond family, beyond friends, beyond all of the things, because it is rivalry week in college football. And there is nothing better on the planet for me personally. 

Then rivalry week in college football. Now, historically, as a purple and [00:22:00] gold bleeding LSU fan, we had Arkansas, and then the SEC restructured, and we had Texas A& M, and you and I have had the Texas A& M fun, and I've had the Texas A& M fun. With Julie, the fabulous accounting manager, with the restructure of the SEC again, they took Texas A& M away from us. 

We've already gotten our booty honeys kicked by Texas A& M this season in a game that LSU decided to send the junior high players to play. We have Oklahoma this weekend, and I'm struggling to get excited about that. We're playing Oklahoma and Baton Rouge. We're still trying to figure out if we want to go to that game. 

I'm not excited about seeing everything else.  

Shane: Who's the real rivalry there? Alabama?  

Tonya: LSU's rival is whoever we're playing that week. But our long term, traditional rival was Arkansas. And we played Arkansas on Friday at 11 a. m. It wasn't a Saturday game. It was a brunch [00:23:00] game on Friday morning. And it was a thing. 

And I would get in the car. And go north or south after we ate on Thanksgiving and go to that game. But it's not that it's the matchup against Oklahoma. It's that I have no rivalry feeling against Oklahoma. Like it's not fair.  

Shane: They need to bring Arkansas back because Arkansas is probably the same way. 

They need to match that back up. And I'll make sure I call the S commissioner and take care of that when we get off the podcast. Look, here's the thing, Oklahoma's going to come back and it is going to be a strong program again. It's just like Nebraska. You can't have top 10 college football without Nebraska and Oklahoma. 

No, we don't have that right now, but historically, you gotta have Nebraska Oklahoma going on. So it is a good match up if Oklahoma can get with it and bring their aura of history back with them. But I would be for the LSU Arkansas match up to come back. I am extremely stoked that [00:24:00] we've gotten our Longhorn Aggie match up on Thanksgiving, after Thanksgiving weekend, back after a 10 year hiatus  

Tonya: and I will say I'm excited for that game I am so excited for that game that  

Shane: will go down in history as one of the biggest snafus in texas sports history that we allowed That rivalry to be disrupted for two years now last year and now this year a and m in texas have had fall softball exhibition games Much like kansas, missouri had one this year. 

It's not a fall exhibition game Even though it is a fall exhibition game 10 inning games rotating players Let me tell you, it gets nasty and it gets super competitive. You can't take that rivalry out of Texas sports. No different than you probably shouldn't have taken LSU Arkansas out of [00:25:00] Arkansas and Louisiana sports. 

You need it. Society needs that rivalry. I'm so pumped. It used to be on Thanksgiving Day. They've moved it to Saturday. It's on Saturday now. And I'm pretty sure that my wife didn't miss that game when she was in college, by the way. They were in the same conference, but that she didn't miss it. And her Thanksgiving, at times, she has memories. 

Her dad went, one year. I think I went one year. Those were incredible memories being on the third deck higher than the birds fly at Kyle Field with Texas and Texas A& M playing each other, most of the time in the rain. And it was just this thing. You're miserable at the moment and you're so grateful for the memory later on. 

Tonya: I will definitely be cheering for the Aggies that day and hopefully LSU will beat Oklahoma. And Alabama will beat Auburn and I'll be right in the world of the SEC. So happy Thanksgiving, you [00:26:00] guys. Thank you for listening to us. We love what we do. We hope that we make a difference in your life, in your agency. 

And we have hearts filled with gratitude this Thanksgiving and always to you, our listeners. I'm going to leave us with this quote from Charlie Brown because it is his season. What if today we were grateful for everything?  

Shane: Attitudes of choice make a great one.  

Announcer: Bye, y'all. At the Integra Partner Network, we understand that carrier access is the key to your agency's success. 

That's why Integra offers direct access to top rated personal and commercial carriers, ensuring your agency thrives in today's challenging markets. And with our comprehensive resources, profit sharing. Bonus opportunities, technology and peer support. All while you retain a hundred percent of your book with no penalties to exit. 

Integra is ready to empower you and your agency to find sustained growth. Find your way [00:27:00] to Integra. Visit IntegraPartnerNetwork. com today. That's IntegraPartnerNetwork. com.