37 | Stop Trying to Be Perfect: 3 People Who Messed Up but God Used Anyway

In this episode, I dive into a truth that many of us struggle with - feeling unworthy of God's love due to our mistakes and imperfections. 

Through the stories of three biblical figures - Moses, Peter, and the Samaritan woman at the well - I share how God's love isn't conditional on our perfection. Each of these individuals had significant flaws and made major mistakes, yet God still chose, loved, and used them powerfully. 

If you're feeling too broken or messed up to be close to God, this episode will remind you that He loves you exactly as you are. I share personal insights and encourage you to embrace God's unconditional love, letting go of the pressure to be perfect. 

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Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:00

Do you ever feel like you are unworthy of God's love or you feel like you are so messed up? You have made so many mistakes. There's no way that you could ever feel or be close to him, because he is holy and he is perfect. Listen, god's love is not conditional on your perfection or my perfection, on your mistakes, on my mistakes. In fact, the Bible is full of people men, women who were extremely flawed, made horrific mistakes, but they were still loved by God, they were still chosen by God and they were still used by God. And so today on the podcast, we're going to look at three of those stories to remind us that God can use us and loves us exactly how we are. Are you looking to manage your emotions and calm your mind so that you don't feel overwhelmed by all the hard times going on right now? Would you like to find true rest and peace in God and a little joy in your weariness? What about understanding why you feel things so deeply, especially when you're stressed? If so, you're in the right place.

Speaker 1: 1:02

Welcome to the Peace-Filled Mind Podcast, your go-to resource for practical tips, real talk and encouragement. I'm your host, latoya Edwards, life and mindset coach and, most of all, a woman who's walked through pain and suffering just like you, no matter what you're currently facing in life or how you've dealt with things in the past. I'm here to help you find peace, joy and hope again. Pop in those earbuds and let's get to it. So how are you doing? It is November. The year is almost over. I cannot believe it. Wow, we're like two more months and 2024 will be done. Just wanted to check in and see how you guys are doing.

Speaker 1: 1:41

It's been a bit of a doozy this year, I think for all of us, and I know it's been true in my life. But I was having a conversation recently with a family member who's walking through a hard time and they basically were just sharing like how hurt they were, how they didn't understand what was going on, and they said something that really just kind of broke my heart. They're like, you know, it's why I know that this is all my fault, that I've sinned and that I've made mistakes and wrong choices and that this is why all of this bad stuff is happening to me, and I guess like this is just God's way of punishing me, and my heart broke because I've been there. I have been that person looking around at her life, going, wow, like this is a mess and a lot of this mess from, like my stupid choices and my stupid decisions, and like just not knowing where to turn, feeling completely rejected, completely alone, completely abandoned, and looking up and wondering like God, like where are you? And then feeling like he had turned his back on me, which then reinforced this idea that, well, if I was perfect, if I had done the right thing, if I had made the right choices, taken the right path, if I had prayed more, fasted more, gone to church more, served more, if I had just done whatever this thing is in my head that I should have done, I wouldn't be in this mess and God would love me and God would still be here with me.

Speaker 1: 3:07

So if that is you today, if you are feeling any of that right now, please know that I feel for you, I love you, I hear you, I know where you are, I know how much that sucks to be in that place, but you're wrong, right, there is literally nothing that you can do that's ever going to make God stop loving you. I tell this to my kids all the time. I'm like listen, you are my son, I love you and there is nothing, absolutely nothing, that you are ever going to do that's going to make me not love you, right, because you're my son. Like it's just impossible for me not to love you, and God feels the same way about you and I, and so I really wanted to just take a moment on the podcast to talk about this idea and this truth that we don't have to be perfect for God to love us. We don't have to be perfect for God to use us. Like the things that are going wrong in our lives are not because we're not perfect. I mean, god knows that we're not perfect. He created us. He knows that we are human. He knows that we don't know everything, that we're going to get things wrong. That's just part of living life here on earth, and we've got to learn to not beat ourselves up, all right.

Speaker 1: 4:14

So today I want to look at three people from scripture that were kind of a hot mess, and there were so many that I could choose from. It was really hard for me to narrow it down to three, but I want to start with Moses. And listen, we all know Moses, right, baby in the basket that was hidden when there was the decree to kill all the Hebrew boys. He gets saved because his mom, right, had this amazing plan and follow the nudging of the Holy Spirit and, ultimately, right, moses is who God uses to set the nation, the children of Israel, free from their bondage in Egypt. But listen, it wasn't all sunshine and roses.

Speaker 1: 4:53

Moses was a hot mess. Okay, he is called to lead the children of Israelites out of Egypt, but he had a lot of struggles along the way, right. So, first off, he had a temper. You look at Moses who's being raised in Pharaoh's house, right, he's being raised as Egyptian royalty and he sees an Egyptian slave master, you know, abusing one of his, you know brothers and sisters in Israel. And so he kills him and he has to run away because he let his temper, and you know his kind of hatred, get the better of him and he lashed out and did something he shouldn't have. Okay, mess number one.

Speaker 1: 5:32

And then we see, even through all of that, as he's living in exile, he's run away. He's, you know, out tending to his father-in-law's, you know business, raising a family. You know, at 40, we still see him making mistakes because God's like hey, moses, you're the dude. And he's like yeah, no, not me. He's like no, you're the dude. He's like, no, I can't. Right, I'm I'm not eloquent in my speech, right, he had all of this self doubt, all of this just like low view of himself when God is like, listen, you are the one that I have chosen to do this big job for my people. And he's like, yeah, no, pick somebody else. Right, and so he, god still uses him. Right, moses is still the one that goes to Pharaoh, that leads the people out of Israel. Now, yes, he has his brother there to speak for him, but Moses is still the dude, all right.

Speaker 1: 6:22

And so what do we see here? We see that, even though Moses kept making mistakes, even though he, you know, lashed out and killed somebody, even though he was full of self-doubt, made excuses, you know, had a speech problem like stuttering or something, god still support him and to help him through that. And then, when they finally get almost to the promised land and Moses loses his temper and disobeys God, right, the children of Israel are, they're thirsty, and God says speak to the rock. And he decides to hit the rock because he's angry. Right, we see him break the 10 commandments because he's angry. Notice the theme with Moses. Right, god still uses him. He's still remembered, as you know, a great person of faith, as a very important Bible history figure.

Speaker 1: 7:11

So what can we learn from this? First of all, learn that God doesn't expect us to have it all together. Okay, like, look at Moses. Did he have anything together? No, he did not. He had a lot of issues, a lot of humanness in him, and God still used him. God gave him what he needed. He provided what he needed. He provided a brother to speak. He provided a father-in-law to give wise counsel. He equipped Moses to do the job that he had called to do. Same thing for you. You don't have to fix everything about yourself before you can step fully into God's plan and his purpose for your life. And you don't have to fix everything about yourself before God is going to step in and be present in your situation, no matter what you're going through. Right, if we could fix ourselves, we would not need God. All right.

Speaker 1: 7:58

Number two Peter, my favorite disciple, and I'm serious about that, but also with a little tongue in cheek, because I see a lot of myself in Peter. So Peter right the rock upon which Jesus built his church. Peter, he's so wonderful and funny and makes all kinds of mistakes. Okay, he was like one of Jesus's closest disciples. Okay, he was there with him for all of the things. Right, he's there in the garden. He's there when Jesus ends up his humanity, right, and shows you know his deity. He was there for all the things and he's still still messed up. Okay, he denied Jesus three times, you know, after he was arrested, right before the crucifixion, because he was afraid of being, like, associated with Jesus. He's cursing out this poor little girl that's like, oh, you're one of those Jesus followers. And he bites her head off Like she didn't do anything to him. We see him like miss the boat so many times, like I mean, one of the most hilarious but also convicting lines is when Jesus looks at Peter and is like get behind me, satan, right, because he just misses the point. They all do, all the disciples miss the point so many times with Jesus. Peter is in the garden where he's supposed to be praying and keeping watch in prayer, and he's slicing off people's ears because he's ready to get to it and get to action. So, listen, did Jesus like sit Peter down and put him in a permanent timeout? No, he didn't.

Speaker 1: 9:21

Jesus was so patient with Peter. He was so patient with all the disciples. He continued to teach them to love them, to lead by example. When Peter hops out of the boat and is walking on water and starts to drown because he's taken his eyes off Jesus, did Jesus look at him and watch him sink into the waves? No, he reaches down, he pulls him up and he lovingly corrects him and encourages him to keep doing what God, what all the things that Jesus taught him to do. All right, he forgave him over and over and over. He reaffirmed who Peter was. He reaffirmed his gifts, he reaffirmed his strength, he reaffirmed his necessity to the kingdom work that was being done. And God, like, gave him this big role. Right, he entrusted him with the leadership of the early church. Like. That was a big deal, it's a big responsibility, and he would not have given to that him like lightly. And so what do we learn from this? Right, your mistakes don't define you. Right?

Speaker 1: 10:17

Peter's legacy is not that he was a hothead with a quick temper and a violent streak Like. That's not what he's known for. Peter is known for being one of the first founding fathers of the church, for being zealot in his faith, in his preaching, in his beliefs and spreading the gospel. This is what he's known for. He is known as the only disciple to get out of the boat and walk on the water. He's known for his great faith. And God can do the same thing for us. He can take those things that are our weaknesses and he can turn them into our strengths and he can use them for all kinds of things. Right, peter was a natural leader. It's part of the reason why he was so like, quick-tempered and such a hothead and ready to go all the time, because he had this gift of leadership, but it just needed to be kind of molded and shaped and trained a little bit, and Jesus was willing to take the time and invest the time to do that, all right.

Speaker 1: 11:07

So what does that mean for you and I? Well, one of the big lessons that I have learned from looking at the life of Peter is just accepting yourself. Right. Self-acceptance is a beautiful thing. Accept that you are who you are the good, the bad, the ugly, the in-between Okay. Acknowledge where you're weak. Acknowledge your failures. Acknowledge where you have areas to grow, but don't stay there right Like let God work in your heart, let God restore, let God equip you and teach you and lean into all of those things so that you can do big things right. Big things Now.

Speaker 1: 11:41

Our final example for today is probably my favorite. I don't know I've got so many favorites, but she is one of my favorite people in totality of scripture and it is the Samaritan woman at the well. And if you have been around for any number of years, you know that I love her. Sam, I call her, I love her story. It speaks to my heart and it's so encouraging all the time. So we find her story in John, chapter four, where Jesus meets a Samaritan woman at a well and he's purposely sitting there waiting for her. If you are familiar with the passage of scripture, they didn't have to go through Samaria to go where they were going. He sends the disciples away and he's waiting for her and she is coming in the middle of the day, so the hottest part of the day, nobody else is at the well, nobody's drawing water, nobody's out there, and this is when she is going out to get water, like water that she needs for cooking, for cleaning, for all of the things.

Speaker 1: 12:35

And she has a past like. She very clearly has a messy, broken past, and it's part of the reason why she's out alone. She's trying to avoid the looks and the whispers, right, and the rejection that she feels because of her past. Right, who has had five husbands. Right Is with somebody right now, but it's not her husband. And, as a woman in that period in history, being unmarried, being childless, right, was a stigma. It was just so heartbreaking in that day and time. Nobody wants to have anything to do with her. As far as society is concerned, she's worthless. She's just damaged beyond repair. There's nothing good about her. She's completely rejected and full of shame. And what does Jesus do? He sees her. He sees her, her like, all the way through her soul. He acknowledges her past. He doesn't judge her. He doesn't like, say shame on you. He doesn't reject her. He offers her the greatest gift of all. He offers her eternal life, right and spiritual renewal and wholeness and healing.

Speaker 1: 13:41

Okay, so, just like God is, met this Samaritan woman at the well with compassion. Okay, he broke all kinds of rules. Okay, he was a Jew, she was a Samaritan. They were not supposed to be talking to each other. They didn't like each other. Samaritans and Jews did not like each other. Jews thought they were better than Samaritans. And, right, he's a man, she's a woman. They should not. And he, like, he's not part of her family, he's not a husband, a brother, a son, like they had no business having a conversation. Okay, that alone would have been more stigma on her, but he doesn't care, he overlooks that to show her that she's seen and that she's loved.

Speaker 1: 14:18

And my favorite part of the story is, like this woman, right, who is rejected, who has all of these reasons according to culture and society, to just like, sit in a corner and waste away and die. What does she do? She is one of the very first evangelists in scripture. She goes back to her town with all those people that have been talking about her and looking their nose down about her and whispering behind her back or whispering in her face, and she shares the gospel. She can't help but tell everybody about the man, the Messiah, about her Jesus that she met and how he changed her life. Okay, so what do we learn from this?

Speaker 1: 14:56

Your mistakes do not disqualify you from anything when it comes to God. Not his love, not his plans and purposes for your life, not being able to do great things for the kingdom, not being able to share and encourage, you know, the people that are in your sphere of influence. Nothing right. He actually uses that. He uses the things that we deem broken, that we deem unredeemable, that we might be ashamed of, to reach and bless other people. Listen, my whole ministry and business is built off of my hard stuff. Do you think that I ever thought that I would be on a platform, on a podcast, in the public sphere, sharing my walk through who, like you know, abuse and all the things that I've gone through? No, like, if it was up to me, I would not be telling anybody any of this. I would be keeping it to myself. But God, like he, has bigger plans for that. He wants to use that and so we understand from her story.

Speaker 1: 15:49

It's just the importance of being who you are right, of authenticity, of being vulnerable. Be exactly who God created you to be and don't let anything steal your voice or silence you out of shame or judgment or rejection. Okay, jesus met her exactly where she was. He intentionally went out of his way to be there. When she got there, right, his disciples were perplexed and like befuddled about. Like, why are we going this way? Why are you sending us off to get food? Like what are you doing? But he had an appointment, he had a plan and purpose to be there for her, and he has the same thing for you and I.

Speaker 1: 16:25

So we've talked about Moses and Peter and the woman at the well as examples of how our imperfections, our mistakes, our missteps are not things that get in the way of God's love for us. They are not things that get in the way of us being able to have purpose and have meaning to our lives. All right. So I want you right now, whatever it is that is kind of holding you back, I want you to let go of the pressure to be perfect, right, there is no such thing as a perfect Christian. I've talked about that before on the podcast. No such thing. There's just imperfect people who love Jesus and are trying to do their best.

Speaker 1: 17:03

Okay, so let go of that. Remember that God's love is deep, right, that perfect love casts out fear. So, whatever you're afraid of, you know, oh, I'm afraid that if people find out this or if I make this misstep, like, perfect love casts out fear and God is that perfect love. Focus on God's love for you and let the rest of that fade in the background. Okay, because you're fully known, you're fully loved, you're fully chosen, you're fully wanted, right With your imperfections and mistakes, not in spite of them. Like all of you, all of your mistakes, everything you're going to get wrong, everything you don't understand, he loves you and he wants you just as you are.

Speaker 1: 17:43

So I want to encourage you to maybe take some time to get your journal and your pen out and just reflect on this question what part of your story is causing you to feel the most shame? Or what part of your story is it that you want to hide from the world? Okay, and then like, how can you see God in that? And how can you see God maybe encouraging you to use that for something good, as always? If anything about this episode resonated with you, if you're like Utolia I am struggling with shame, I'm struggling with rejection, I am feeling all these things and I don't know what to do.

Speaker 1: 18:20

I'm here for you. I have some coaching spots available. I would love to talk with you to help you identify what you're feeling, begin to process those emotions and begin to see how God is working and showing up in your life. So if you hop on over to the show notes in my coaching link, latoyaedwardsnet slash coaching. You can get on my calendar and we can spend some time together looking at where you are and how to help you move forward. So until next time, take care. I hope you were blessed and encouraged by today's episode. I would love to hear from you. The best way to do that is to leave a five-star rating and review on your podcast player, sharing what you loved or found helpful about today's episode. This helps other women find the show and it's a huge blessing to me. Thank you so much for joining me today.