When Silence Becomes More Dangerous Than Cancer

If you’ve ever ignored a lump, a change, or a nagging symptom because you didn’t want to “say it out loud”, this conversation is for you. We’re joined by Laura Urubo, Founder and CEO of Cancer Care Diaspora, a Manchester-based charity supporting Black and other ethnic minority individuals, families and carers affected by cancer across Greater Manchester. Laura’s work starts from lived experience, and it turns into a practical guide for getting help sooner and feeling less alone.

We talk honestly about cancer stigma in the community, how faith can be a comfort without replacing medical care, and why silence can lead to late diagnosis. Laura explains what she sees again and again: people waiting until pain forces them to seek help, symptoms being misunderstood, and patients feeling dismissed. We dig into self-advocacy at the GP, using clear language for symptoms, and why cultural competence in the NHS can make the difference between reassurance and the right referral.

You’ll also hear what support can look like beyond hospital appointments: peer-led support groups, help understanding letters, phone support, home and hospital visits, and care that includes nutrition, gentle exercise, mental health, and practical support for carers. We also discuss why ethnic minority representation in cancer research and clinical trials matters, so future treatments work for everyone.

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Transcript

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Meet Laura And The Charity

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Hello and welcome once again to the Authentic Travel Podcast. Today's guest is like I always tell my guest are special, right? But this is another special person again that brought us to you today. So I'm going to allow her to introduce herself because I don't think I'll be able to do justice to introducing her because she's a woman I feel we're different at. So thank you so much, Laura Urubo, for joining us on this um episode today. Could you please introduce yourself?

SPEAKER_02 0:28

Yeah, thanks, Sonya. Thanks for having me. And um, hello everybody. So my name is Laura Urubo, and I'm founder, CEO of Cancer Care Diaspora. We look after ethnic minority families, individuals and carers, and people that are from you know black minority communities affected by cancer in the UK. We're based um primarily in Manchester, but we work, you know, um GM wide, greater Manchester wide, because we have people that come from outside of Manchester, both in Wigan, you know, to to seek for support and help. So basically, we started charity, like you said, uh Senior about 10 years ago. It was in March um 2016 when my I lost my dad to cancer. And um, in fact, when he got his diagnosis in 2015, I was already thinking of, you know, what's with this cancer thing. I did my background in science, I did biological sciences in uni. So I kind of knew what cancer was, but you never really know what it is until it hits home. Because when my dad got his diagnosis, and we were just checking, I was googling and seeing what's cancer, how does it affect people, and all that? I started seeing that even although my dad was in Nigeria then back home at the time, I kind of saw a lot of similarities between diagnosis, you know, in Nigeria and diagnosis in the UK within the black community. There's a lot of um you know, miss diagnosis because sometimes the doctors are not sure what it is, and then you know, as sadly, sometimes people don't even know how to express, you know, what they are the signs they're seeing, the symptoms they are feeling. So it might be there's a lot of misdiagnoses and of course late um diagnosis and all of that. You know, sometimes it's not even the patient's fault, it might even be the you know, the hospitals, the doctors, the people looking after them. So I saw all that similarities, and I thought, you know what, um it's just not right, you know, why we come all the way from every country's people have come from to the UK to work and settle, pay their taxes, do all of that, and then you know, we all have the same access to the NHS. Why is it that the black community are disproportionately affected by cancer? I saw a lot of very strange statistics. Black women are more liable to you know have late-stage breast cancer diagnoses, black men have uh more chances of having prostrate cancer and late-stage prostate cancer diagnosis, and black men dying month from you know, it was all that it was just like doom, you know, gloom and all of that. I felt, you know what, we've got to do something about it. And I I knew there was a couple of other charities around as at you know, 2016, but there was really no cancer one I could see to to ask them what they've been doing, what what they found out. I knew there was um a wonderfully made woman, or she was a friend of mine, and I spoke to her and said, I I have this you know strong desire to set up a cancer charity because I feel like there's we need we need help, we need to you know put put more awareness about cancer in the community. And she was like, Yeah, that's that's true. That she doesn't think there's any you know cancer charities around that I should go for it. So she was kind of like a mentor, just always going to ask her, How did you set up charity? What do you do and all of that? So, like I said, it wasn't really the same because she she dealt with um women, you know, self-confidence in women and domestic violence and all of that. But I felt you know the foundation was the same, ethnic, so I felt like we had the same foundation. I was looking at the ethnic community, yes. I started. I just you know, I didn't even wait for anybody to take tell me what to do. I just like started learning on the job. So I started support groups in um long sites. Um there was um Palmo Road, that was my first support group I did close to um where you have a lot of Caribbeans, you know, Caribbean families. I had a support group there, and that was when I discovered there was another charity as well. So yeah, so I just kind of like I said, I was just learning on the job, but my desire was just to set up this charity to support people that don't know where to go, they don't know what to do when they have the diagnosis.

Stigma, Faith And Late Diagnosis

SPEAKER_02 4:21

Black people um in the in the UK, aside from you know, sometimes the late diagnosis, we also have our own cultural you know factors that slow us down. So talking about cancer, they think you know, when you say it it's gonna happen. People that have faith, we all have one faith or the other, we're either Christians or Muslims or even Hindu or something. So sadly, people just use faith and religion to cover, you know, going to the doctor. I don't think there's anywhere in the Bible where where the God has said don't go to the doctors, you know, He's giving them the wisdom to look after us. So if you know you've got symptoms, why would you keep it and be praying alone? Yeah, that works, is that you've got to put in the work, yes, have the faith and also you know put in the work as well. Go to the doctors, go to the hospital, go for your screening, go for your tests, and all of that. Yeah, so that's pretty much what we'll be doing for 10 years, creating that awareness. We do, you know, we do uh community awareness sessions, run support group weekly, and uh we've kind of evolved into other things. We've started um supporting children and young people, yeah, those families, we do holiday clubs, we have um fitness exercise, free fitness sessions, or we have um trained fitness coaches that come in because with um cancer prevention, which we also preach prevention as well. It's all about um you know staying healthy, keeping healthy diets. So we talk a lot about healthy nutrition, we work with the NHS a lot, other organizations, you know, that um focus on Black health or Black Asians and other minority health, and then they come to our sessions to deliver some in topics. We do a lot of trainings, we we take part in research to be sure that when you know um there's treatments coming up, uh, people are well represented. So that's pretty much all we've been doing for the last 10 years.

SPEAKER_00 6:07

This episode is sponsored by ASAP Consultancy, a home of personal transformation for the mind, body, and soul. If you're ready to rise up into body and move away from depression, feel anxiety, move through from traumatic emotional pain, and live with confidence in order for you to be in quality, for you to move from surviving to thriving. Why don't you visit our website www.asebconsultancy.com. We'll support you through counseling, life coaching, and other trauma recovery programs, grief courses, and it will even offer one at a time therapy. All of the services is available virtually, so you do not even have any excuse of saying you do not want to leave your home. You have everything from the comfort of your home also supports you to move from surviving to driving before you go. Have you subscribed yet? Like, share, and comment on what resonates with you so far on this episode. But if you have not done so, why don't you just click that button now? Thank you.

Early Detection Starts With Talking

SPEAKER_00 7:16

Back to the program now, you and to be able to confide in you what they were going through because these are serious stuff, it affects our mental, our emotional, our physical, even our spiritual well-being.

SPEAKER_02 7:26

That's right, yeah. So, like you said, you know, with with um the the cancer thing, there's kind of like um stigma around cancer, you know, people, but we're just trying to um change people's minds about that because cancer is a disease like any other disease, just like how you're free to talk about oh, I've got diabetes. You should be free to talk about because when you don't, if you don't talk about how you're gonna get the help. So, we we what we do in the community, we said that with our first ever, you know, a patient that walked through the door and then a few referrals from friends that sort of was doing the you know, cancer awareness and all that, so got a few referrals. And I said to them, if you keep hiding your your disease, you're not gonna get help. You know, a closed mouth, like we say now in our culture, closed mouth and a closed destiny. So you keep it to yourself, and sadly that they happened a lot of times. You know, we'll just hear um of you know a friend, a long-term person that we've known in the community has just died. Then you're wondering, what happened? I saw her two years ago, I saw her a year ago. How did they suddenly die? But then when you ask, when you begin to ask more, they say, Oh, they think it was they wouldn't even nobody would confirm to say, Oh, we think it was cancer. That's because nobody started talking about until the person was like really, really ill. And you know, with cancer, when it's caught early, it can be treated, it can be as when you know they just take whatever maybe the early stage, stage one, stage two, if it's a lump, if it's you know, tiny mass that's gathered, they take it out, and you know, a bit of chemotherapy here, and then you're back to normal. More people leave it until stage three, stage four. Sadly, there's usually, and then because we I don't know why I for instance breast cancer that black women have is a very aggressive one. If you don't catch it in an early stage, once it gets to stage four, that's the thing, you know. Sadly, it's gone, it's it's too late to do anything, and then that's when we hear people that oh, they've they've got cancer, that's because they've come out late. So I tell people, forget about the shame. There's a lot of shame as well. People are like, Why me? You know, the thing with cancer, cancer does not respect anybody. You can say the king had cancer, the the princess, duchess of you know, uh, true, true, true. It's one thing that does not respect. You can say diabetes. Maybe if you're rich, you're eating well, you're eating healthy, you're exercising, going to the gym 24 hours a day, and all that. You can escape things like diabetes and kidney stuff and all that. But trust me, cancer, if you even if you're like a billionaire, if cancer wants to come, it's gonna come. Cancer does not respect anybody, the rich, the poor, the tall, the dark, the white man. So that's why cancer we should treat it, we know with the difference that that that it is. If it's not gonna respect anybody, it's not gonna respect your stylus, it's not gonna respect you as a Christian, then why don't you make sure you know about it and see a little sign? You see what the the the the white people that's why you see a lot of very few cases among amongst them when they see a speck, like a tiny speck, they're at the GP, they are banging on GP's door. Well, I've seen a speck, like you know, I've seen a little lump on my skin, I've seen a little dark spot on my skin. But our people, the black community will wait until it is full-blown, probably because they are in so much pain. Because sadly, when it's like you know, late stage and they begin to feel a lot of pain, a lot of discomfort, and then they say, Oh, they can't hide it anymore. But sadly, if you go, you know, the fact is if you go early to the doctor when it's that tiny lump or that tiny speck, just like the other ethnicities will do, you know, the other people will do. Trust me, we'll have a lot of you know, fewer cases. So that stigma we need to that that's why the charity, you know, I was very keen on making sure the stigma were dispelling those meets, those you know, it's um is a taboo thing, maybe it's the sins your fathers have committed, this is village people, you know, it's home trouble. No, it's not. You could just come, like you said, it doesn't express anybody, so it could just come at any time. But the bottom line is when you catch it early, then it can be treated, it can you you can go back to your job, the job you're trying to avoid not going to the doctor for because you don't want to take sick leave, you don't want to lose your shifts, you don't want to, you know, you know, get laid off, or you don't want to see that people your manager thinks you're not serious. That job is gonna go on without you anyway. So why don't you just take some time off, get it treated, and then you can go back to you know normal life.

SPEAKER_00 11:43

Yeah,

Getting Taken Seriously At The GP

SPEAKER_00 11:44

thank you so much, Laura, for pointing it out that cashing it early is very important. Any signs that you see, you don't need to start going on Google, you're not a doctor. Go and see your GP so that they can refer you. But then again, Laura, I've also heard people say that they've been and they were not referred quickly, they were not taken seriously. I've heard black people complain about this. Have you got anything that oh yes?

SPEAKER_02 12:09

We have a lot of um, sadly, a lot of you know, um, people's experience like that. You know, that's what was I was saying initially. Sometimes the cultural factors, you know, that affect you know our communities when they see things, they might not know how to, maybe the language barrier as well, you know, they're afraid they might the doctor might not understand what they are saying. So when they say, Oh, I've got this thing on my on my on my chest, they're not using the right words as well. So sometimes it might even be the you're not seeing the right symptoms. So if you go and say I got chest pain, then the doctor is not going to know you mean you've got breast issues, if it's breast cancer, for instance. So that's why at times, you know, the the the language barrier, the cultural factors, and then of course, some doctors we've been hammering them on this one cultural competency, they don't even know the the demography of their patients, they don't know because if you see an Asian woman, for instance, you know, hijabi woman, for instance, and um she's not gonna use the word breast because for our culture, they don't say those things, or even some black people too, maybe some of that you know of strong faith, and they think, Oh, don't say breast, don't say those hidden private things, but then they are saying to you, I've got chest pain. But as a doctor, I think you know, it a doctor would know to probe more when takes us as at surface level, or I've checked your heart rate, is okay, I've checked your blood pressure, is okay. I can't see where the chest pain is coming from. But meanwhile, it might be actually a lump or you know, a mass in the breast that's causing that breast pain that or that's making them say, Oh, it's chest pain. So a lot of um, you know, misdiagnoses, you know, yeah, it's it's it's it's not um the patient's fault in most cases, it might be the doctor not understanding what the patient was saying. So we've been doing a lot of um cultural competency trainings with GPs and other personals to make sure that you look at your patient, know their demographic, know their culture, know what they say and what they what they might be too shy to say, and then try and link it up. If a woman comes to you with things like that, or um lower abdomen pain, they might say, Oh, it's stomach pain, might be something around the pelvis area, might be something around the even the you know the vaginal area, or something really private that they might not want to say out. Yeah, we need to teach people that's another thing with our community. We need to be teaching people to empower them to know all these things. If you know it is breasts, don't try about it. I'll rather be alive and say the word breast all the time so they can I can get checked than be dead because I've kept it to myself, I've not used the right words, yeah, I've not used the right, you know, I've not said my symptoms out clearly to the doctor and they've missed it.

SPEAKER_00 14:50

Yeah, please use the right terminology.

SPEAKER_02 14:54

Exactly.

SPEAKER_00 14:55

We all breast is breast. Well, we see that, or sometimes maybe some people just is even ignorance at the end of the day. So I like the fact that you are telling people be your own self-advocates, keep knocking, that pain is not gone. You've seen a GP, go back again and complain again, go back again and complain when you keep coming like that because okay, maybe there's something here, let's try and probe it.

SPEAKER_02 15:17

So tell patients here that when you go and actually we know with the with the NHS, the problems they've been going through these years, and they they say, Oh, there's no appointment. Just tell them I suspect it's cancer. Because if you have a lump on your breast and they're telling you, sorry, we don't have any appointments, call again in the morning at 8 a.m. And you know by 8 a.m. you're gonna be at work. You've you've left probably you've let work start to start late so you can catch them this morning. You've called them at eight o'clock, or maybe 10 past eight. Sadly, you've not made that um quota for them, and they're saying call again, but you're afraid, use that tell them I suspect it might be cancer because this thing has been there. I've seen this thing for over two weeks now, it's not going away. So make sure you insist on seeing a doctor, and we know now if you say that you suspect it is it might be cancer, or you suspect it's that serious, then they would they'll call you in right away.

SPEAKER_00 16:06

Oh, fantastic! It's using the right word, very, very important. Please use the right word and insist, just call it what it is. If you say it, it doesn't mean that's what it is. Right, it's it doesn't mean diagnosis now automatically be waiting for you, but at least you've gone through all the tests and then you know exactly that you are going through uh um some some form of um they are listening to you and you're going through some form of process. Thank you very much.

Filling The Aftercare Gap

SPEAKER_00 16:32

Okay, so there are some people they already have the diagnosis there, but they don't know about support that is out there. Because unfortunately, the NHS they do all those pray-up and the rest. There are different services that are disappearing, you know, like the aftercare, there are some things in the community where nurses will come from the community, even giving birth now. There are so some services that were really, really good that they are clawing back bit by bit. And I think this is where people like you will come in, like your charity, where you'll be able to to then do things to help them. How how are you meeting that need and covering that that gap for our community so that people will become aware of it as well?

SPEAKER_02 17:10

Yes, so we we are based in the community, we're there since we started in you know in 2016. We've not closed our doors, even during the pandemic. We were online, you know, so we're still there weekly, but online weekly sessions, we were doing doorstep deliveries and doorstep checkups. So we'll knock on the door, are you okay? Is everything okay? Checking on people, making sure they're okay, their mental health is fine, they're not left alone because of because everybody was left alone at some point during the pandemic. So we are always there, our doors have never you know shut completely. So we they know where to find us, and then we keep saying to them, when if you've had the diagnosis, you're still not sure. You still just want like somebody to help you, look at some appointment letters, check some things. That's why we're here, you know, with our support group. Our support group is peer-led, so there's a lot of people that have had the diagnosis, they've had their treatments, chemo with therapy, immunotherapy, they finish their treatment, they are back to work, or they're back to doing their businesses. You know, they've they've some of them are on remission now, they've you know, they've been given the all clear. So we have all this people in our in our support group that when we have new referrals, they can be like mentors and say, you know what? When I was going through my own cancer, this is what I did. You know, some gorgeous ladies will say, Oh, I made sure when I was going for my chemo, for instance, I would eat because then you're gonna be in this way for hours having chemotherapy. Make sure you eat because days after that, you might not be able to you lose your appetite, you might be picked up, things like that. But they say, you know what, what worked for me? I made sure I made very nice pot of soup. I ate a very heavy meal, vegetables, lots of iron, give iron, you know, give vegetables and things like that, spinach and stuff made a nice vegetable soup, it's you know, swallow with soup and fish and chicken. So they just tell you what worked for them. So all you know, things are what is working for for our community because we're always there, like I said, our supposed group meeting sessions are there twice a week. Actually, we meet alongside, and we also have another one in Hapoy. So, whichever one is you know is convenient, they attend, and they are sure of meeting people that have gone through the diagnosis, gone through their treatments. You know, our telephone lines are open 24 hours. You can ring us anytime to say this is what they're doing.

SPEAKER_00 19:20

So, do you have virtual services as well for people? Maybe they're in the UK, but they are not in GM um area.

SPEAKER_02 19:26

Do you have a virtual services where they can? We don't do virtual for now, it was just during the pandemic. We did the virtual work online. But like I said, we have a telephone you know service that is on 24 hours, and if anybody can ring us anytime and then we would, you know, speak to them and see how we can help them. We do home visits as well. So if they cannot make it, we actually travel to people's, yeah. Some volunteers, we we myself and volunteers, we can go do home visits, check up on them if they are really poorly, or we can we actually go to the hospital as well within a nice meal, they might not like the hospital food. You know, of course, most of the food are not like what uh people will eat, yeah. So, and then they they are very weak, they are hungry, because you know, you need a full belly for treatment to work, you need to be the right nutrition you know level for your treatment to work. So we we we get those calls and then we we get have some caterers we'll work with, they make nice healthy meals, and then we take it to the hospital for this for the patients. So they even if then they can't come to our sessions, we go to them.

SPEAKER_00 20:23

Wow, seriously, go bless you and your team, Laura. You know, this is a very sacrificial you know, when people are on on that stage, is every little help, every little help as well.

Food, Portions And Healing Strength

SPEAKER_00 20:37

You've I can't help but but notice that you've mentioned something about good food, about good food many times since you know, some people just carry on with their diet. Are there things that maybe someone has been through the treatments? Are there things that they should be eating that will help them?

SPEAKER_02 20:53

Oh, yeah, diet is important, yes. You know, even there when when they finish um yeah, when they're going through treatment, the nurses will tell them what they should be avoiding, you know, avoid maybe things like red meat and fatty food and things like that. And then we also, you know, assist because of course we we've seen the ex we have the experience, we have people that we've worked with over the years, so we know that just try and avoid you know, red meat, for instance, you know, a high um cholesterol diet, because you don't want to be treating cancer and you're also impounding your body with lots of you know um cholesterol and fat, things like that, you know, and then eat freshly cooked food, avoid you know, microwave tell them in the hospital try because when you're going to you're going through chemotherapy already, so there's not already you know the chemo stuff and everything going into you. So you don't want to be including a microwave. There's no um you know research that said it causes cancer or anything, but for that treatment period, just avoid using the microwave to heat your food, try and eat on the hub, yeah, direct on the hub or cook it fresh and eat it fresh. Yeah, so diet is really important because you know, um you need good food for your body to. To heal, you need good food for the medication to work on your body. So yeah, we we work with them um when it comes to you know the kind of body kind. We have um expert nutritionists that come to our sessions and teach us, you know, what um they actually know, even if they are from other cultures, they know our food now. They'll tell you if you're going to eat um rice and and stew, for instance, you know, the portion size, portion is very important, and then make sure you're eating more of the vegetables. So make sure you're doing adding you know, salad, salad vegetables to it. If you're eating just rice and stew, you should be adding vegetables. If you're eating soup, then vegetables should be a lot, you know. Don't cook it forever and make and and and lose all the nutrients. Yeah, you only take about 10-15 minutes to cook once it's cooked, like then you can you can then that you you know it's fresh and it's got all the nutrients, and you're eating more of veg, so you know, portion size, you're eating a bit of just the rice or the swallow, pounding about something amala fufu, but you control the that portion, but your veg should be a lot more than yeah, should fill the plates more. Say half of the plates should be your veg, one quarter should be the you know the the carbs, yeah, things like that. So we usually work with um nurses and uh nutritionists, and of course the patient themselves to make sure they're eating the right food.

SPEAKER_00 23:14

Fantastic. We were just okay, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 23:16

Yeah, you're thinking about the eatware plates, exactly. Yeah, yeah. But of course, even if you're not you know, you're not having you're not being you've not been diagnosed with any ill or anything, you've got to keep healthy, you've got to stay healthy because your healthy diet, healthy lifestyle is is a lifestyle that you should have forever with you, you know. So don't because on because I'm not sick now, you eat everything you want to eat, but make sure you're eating the right food, you're eating your you know, five a day, your veg, your fruits, and everything, and exercising as well, because that's the only way you can prevent illness.

SPEAKER_00 23:46

Yeah, exercising.

Gentle Exercise That Builds You Back

SPEAKER_00 23:47

I was coming to that as well. You know, you know, this treatment makes people feel very, very weak. So by the time they are recovering, what kind of exercise would you recommend? Like, is it is it something major?

SPEAKER_02 23:59

No, it'll be something simple, yeah. Yeah, but why it's good to always to have that healthy lifestyle anyway, because you know the things that you've done we will help your body. So if your your body is naturally used to exercising, you know, and then of course you get your diagnosis, then you know you're already your body is fit and all of that. So when when you're going uh coming off your treatments gradually, you can gradually go into exercise again because you're already exercising, your body's already used to you know, that's you you've got the stamina, so it's major, not going to the gym, but like that's how we work with um trained fitness coaches, they know you know those condition exercises take it with the with the with our service users, you take it really slow. It's chair yoga, we're on the chair, we do simple weight lifts, you know, yeah, arm movement, leg movement on the chair. Then as as they get stronger, they can stand up and do some movements, and then they can begin to run around a little bit. We have um in the two sessions we have, we always have 30 minutes for exercise because yeah, it's 30 minutes a day, you know.

SPEAKER_00 24:59

So we're kind of like 30 minutes a day.

SPEAKER_02 25:01

Yeah, those two 30 minutes for those two days. So you can you've got 30 minutes when you go home the next day, do your 30 minutes, come back on a Friday, do you know if 30 minutes? So, yeah, 30 minutes a day is really good. Just you don't have to do like five five hours in one day, just um 30 minutes each day, every day. Yeah, you've you're you're covering your tracks with that with that.

SPEAKER_00 25:19

Oh, I love the way you simplify things, Laura. It makes it so doable, like you that's like, yeah, very the way you just separated. When I was here, you call Amalabadia and ever but a little portion, you are not eliminating it that will make people we love our food, you know.

SPEAKER_02 25:38

So you know we love our food, yeah. Yeah, yeah, so but it makes sure you're eating the right, you know, the right quantity, and then yeah, tummy, and also you know, just for um health healthy um lifestyle-wise, try to avoid heavy, heavy meals in the ninth. We say that to our uh in our groups all the time. Don't be eating your fufu at night. That should be lunch, you know. I know, of course, people walk long hours. Maybe once you get back, try and eat it before it gets dark because you need to you need the food to digest. Yes, so we encourage all those things to be lunch and not supper. Supper should be something light, you know, otherwise it won't digest, and you're going straight to bed. So one uh doctor was saying if you're gonna eat fufu at night, then make sure you're on your feet, maybe washing the dishes, tightening up, doing something for 30 minutes, just make sure it aids that quick digestion. Yeah, don't eat fufu and sit down and watch TV and then you go to bed. So things like that, just those little things they count, like you said, those little things you actually count in the end of the day. So make sure if you cannot help it, you have to eat late that day, then you can even go for a walk. It's long, it's longer days now, isn't it? So yes, it is stays brighter for longer. So just you know, lock your dog, go for a quick 20-30 minutes walk around your neighborhood, come back. So you've done your 30 minutes, you know.

SPEAKER_00 26:50

Yes, yes, wow, Laura, thank you. So the next one I'm gonna ask you

Fear, Mindset And Mental Health

SPEAKER_00 26:55

now. We've talked about the body, right? I'm moving slowly now to the mind. Okay I I believe because as a counselor, right? I believe that we are intrapartite human beings, we have the body, the mind, and the spirit. So you have to look after the mind. A lot of people think that when they get a diagnosis, the fear, the worry, it's almost like the person has just given them a death sentence, they are gone already. So that fear would work against whatever treatment that you're going. Because you are going there, you are scared. You don't even believe in the medication, you don't believe in whatever it is, even the SIS, the change of that, you don't believe in anything because your mind is just telling you that this is it, this is it, this is it. Are there things that you people also do that will help people to build their their mind so that because I know the battlefield of the mind is real? I myself have experiences in different different challenges in life whereby because you're not focusing on it, the problem looks so so big, so so big that it just overwhelms you, it makes you so fearful, can lead to anxiety, and then you just get into that low mood and and and things like that. How do you normally support them with that?

SPEAKER_02 28:05

Yeah, so we with uh we do a lot of you know support with mental health, you know, it we just encourage them and let them know people are there for them. Sometimes it's just the fear of am I gonna die? And we assure them cancer is not a death sentence. So once we can assure them that there's this person here, there's this lady here, she had our operation, uh, you know, chemotherapy, everything 15 years ago, and she's still here. So, you know, with that peer support, as I said, we uh we use a peer support model. Then then when they come, they see that oh, this person has done has gone through what I'm going through now, and they survived it. And we always share, you know, stories, not all about you know, this person died, that person died. We share living stories because every year we always have you know, if it's um quarterly um sessions where we do community events, everybody's invited, we you know have like nice meals, but good food. Ketra does you know, buffet and everything. We have doctors and nurses that come in. Trust me, people live the experience, they're actually there that talk to our people and say, I had cancer, they share their stories. Yes, you know, with those stories, people then can see, oh, it's I'm not alone in this. This person has gone through what I'm going through now. Yeah, so that's why it's important to come, don't just stay alone in your house, and it's good to encourage them. That's how we do our sessions in in community spaces. Yes, you don't leave it as online, then you're it's still in your house, in your home. So you come out to the session, you make friends because you know, sharing your story alone is already half your friends share this problem, half you know, half solved. Yeah, meet people, they make friends. A lot of people in our group have made lifelong friends, they for each other's children's you know, children's weddings and children's they attend birthday parties, we even go on holidays together because we're making friends, yeah. So that that alone helps with you know your mental health. When you have friends, you know, you people you can trust and talk to. We are there every week, so they can come in and you know and speak with their friends, and we can do we do activities, you know. You know, we do kind of like do, you know, if it's um a chat, chat about different things. We can go on trips and you know, that's so those things help us to you know carry help people with their mental health. Like I said, we have activities that we do. Sometimes there's you know a party where we all you know look nice and we go and call some of our members, you know, and things like that. So, you know, mental health is really important because without you know, a good mental health, you might not even have your treatment working for you because you're you're stressed, you're anxious. So you need that clear mind. So that's why we always encourage you know, coming out, taking those two days of the week to join the sessions. We even tell them go if it's another session in your neighborhood, feel free to join another charity. They have other events, join them if it's gardening. We encourage gardening. We have, in fact, with our food bank, sometimes we get flowers and plants, we give them those that have gardens, plant fresh flowers, plant you know, seeds and things like that. Tell us what's working for you. Well, how is your garden? How is it going? And then we should we share, we share a lot at the charity, and that way people get to talk.

SPEAKER_00 31:09

Yeah, that's absolutely wonderful. You know, the UK can be very isolated, yeah, very, very isolated.

Carers, Faith And Support After Loss

SPEAKER_00 31:15

Now, for someone in their family, maybe the mom or the dad or the child has got cancer and they are going through treatment or they finished treatment. Now, the carers, the burden of a carer is is very, very overwhelming. Is there anything that your charity do for this kind of people as well?

SPEAKER_02 31:33

Oh, definitely. So, uh our charity we support both um individuals and families affected by cancer and their carers, so that's part of our you know, our our mission. So the mission is support carers, you know, the the patient themselves, and of course the children, so young people, those families. So with the carers, they they come to our sessions too, so they get the free exercise, they get free food parcels every week with our food bank. In fact, twice they want to come for the two sessions, they get that, they join the the fitness exercise, they join our trips, they go on you know on trips with us. We have those big events where they come in as well. Um, in fact, um, for the last six six months, we've been we've been having a special program just for carers. When they come to the session, we really sit down and talk about everything. So our mental health, talking about you know, um free some uh exercise that you can do at home or things that you can do on your own while you're not, you know, if you want to have a break, come to the session. You think you're not doing your caring responsibilities, you come out, you know, things like that. So we'll be doing it for the last six months just for carers. We you know support them with um you know transport, allowance and things like that. Yeah, so it's we we they they are a big part of our community as well, carers of people that are affected by by cancer.

SPEAKER_00 32:48

I must commend you for this well-rounded and very thoughtful package and services that you're offering. You know, it's almost like any part I want to touch you, you you already thought you already thought about it. It just shows that it is not it is not laurel led, it is community-led. That's what I can catch here because it seems there's a lot of input here. Um, and because I know you go for trainings a lot. So it's like you love learning, and that's a great thing because it reflects in your practices that you are describing right now with all this training, with all this awareness, with all this collaboration, you are getting yourself aware, you are you are getting access to the right and relevant information at the right time. So I think that's really, really amazing. Now let's come to the spiritual side.

SPEAKER_02 33:34

Okay, do you have anything on how to be regardless of their faith, on how they can you know, like I said, we we are spiritual beings, so even if you know, if if we are not Christians, then we're Muslims. So everybody in the charity, for instance, they you know, um they they have a faith. So we have the Christians, we have Muslims, we have Hindu as well in our midst, we have a few Chinese people as well. So there's everybody, there's always one faith or the other. So we encourage them, you know, of course, not to you, you can't leave your faith, is your faith. So hold on to your faith, but then we also make sure we preach that awareness of there's no there's no crime in praying, holding on to your faith and also seeking medical help. So I'm a Christian myself, but I tell them, I know you all have your own faith, but I'm not gonna say because I'm a Christian, I'm just gonna pray away a breast lump, for instance. I've I've got to go. Like with my with my my my dad's diagnosis, I became very conscious. So if I see anything, of course it's natural, you'd be like, Oh, what is this? And then I just go to the doctor and say, you know, because of you know, I've got this um experience with my dad, so I'm afraid, and then they assure me, they do the checks, they do the right checks, yeah. So that of course we are all human beings who might have a bit of you know fear and all of that, we've afraid, but that nagging thing is still there, what if it's cancer? Because you know, you've got your family now. What if so that's why we still make sure we we go to the doctor and they hold on to our faith as well. So if so, whatever faith is, if you're a Muslim, we we we always like and work with the Muslim community. We have some Imams who work with, we have some you know, ladies from the uh the mosque, some of the mosque around Manchester that we partner with. In fact, I've gone to deliver a session in a mosque in um in Ashton. Yeah, we did women and breast cancer awareness month. My son trustees who went there and delivered a session on breast cancer awareness to the women in the mosque. So that you know, we we are we're kind of like everywhere to make sure, yeah. Anyway, people are, we were reaching them, we're meeting them where they are.

SPEAKER_00 35:35

Yeah, faith and science can coexist.

SPEAKER_02 35:37

Oh, definitely. You know, people need to know that it's not either, yeah, because the Bible, when when Jesus Christ healed the blind man, he had to he used um sand and sp and sput on his feet. So it's just like what's happening here. So there has to be something that you know he used, yeah, he mixed them together and rub on the man's eye open. That's the same way with with medications, and funny enough, all these medicines they're all from trees, they're all plants. So your tablets, they've all come from herbs. Yes, why why back home? Uh, you know, grand grandparents, great-grandparents never used to really fall sick because they were always eating herbs. Yes, yes, because and that's how where they make the medicines from. This this the English scientist they just go to the to Africa or anywhere they or wherever the tropics get make them into you know the formula, get the formula and put them together. That's how they make medicine. So I don't so it's science and faith because God created the trees and all these things, yeah. So this is why we're saying they work together. It's not a sin, it's not a crime, it's not uh a ram to go to the hospital and take medicine. No, it's not. Unless you're fasting, then you can leave it for until your fasting period after your fasting period take your medication, you know.

SPEAKER_00 36:55

Yeah, absolutely. You know, I said there's a way you just wrap this together, the way you brought the trees and all these medicines, it's true, you know. We know it's been processed, but these are that's what it is, not not nothing, nothing else, right? I was just gonna say, but what about people that they are bereaved as a result of this? Is there still a package for them?

SPEAKER_02 37:17

Oh, definitely, yeah. Oh, definitely, yeah, yeah. We have yeah, we we support families because when when um we we get a referral, for instance, or somebody walks in through our door and they have cancer, sadly, we've lost some of them, you know. While we are supporting them, we've done all everything we can do, and doctor says, you know, nothing else that can be done for them. So there's a process where they put them on end-of-life care, so we carry on visiting them, we carry on working with the family, and then when they pass away, we visit them, we support them during the funeral, we attend their funeral with them, and and to be fair, people that have that have been with us, we don't have people leaving. So even if the person has passed away, tied to the family because they still come for support, they still come, their children might still come for holiday club, their partners might still come for our sessions, you know, things like that. We still visit them and make sure when when we have like nice uh food supply, we're giving to them. So, yeah, there's um a good um support for for beer families. We we we look after them very well.

SPEAKER_00 38:20

That is so thoughtful. That is so thoughtful. You know, may I would just keep saying, God bless you, God will bless you because this this is a big do you have a big team that join you in doing all of this?

SPEAKER_02 38:34

Volunteer network, yeah. So we're we're blessed. You know, if you had been to our anniversary, you'd say we we we awarded um certificate to all our volunteers. There was 30 of them.

SPEAKER_01 38:44

Oh, wow.

SPEAKER_02 38:47

On during the anniversary, and we have that the way those are just the active volunteers. We have another probably 25-30 volunteers that have worked with us all through these years, but some of them might have you know gotten other jobs outside outside of Manchester or relocated, so we have a good, strong volunteer base. It's it's a volunteer-led charity, you know. I've only got a small team, it's only myself and a part-time project admin down on salary. Every other person is a volunteer. So, and like I said, because we have all the sessions regularly, we need volunteers to help us with the food bank. We have two busy food banks, you know, in the week. In fact, we're gonna start another session in Salford this year now. So we're gonna make three big sites and three food banks. So without the volunteers, I would struggle. So, my volunteers, you know, I'm forever grateful to them because they are a big support to us at a charity.

SPEAKER_00 39:37

Yeah, I'm gonna pull your details, your websites, the address when we do the editing, so I can follow it on the screen and put it on the description box so if you could send me all those things, but people we get to know about this because this is good services that you're offering right here. So, Laura, they said on easy lies, they heard that we're the crowd. How do you look after yourself?

SPEAKER_02 40:03

Ah, interesting, yeah. Yes, I I do take make sure I take time off if I need to. Yeah, because I've got I've got three kids as well. So you can see I'm also a very busy mom. Yes, so I make sure, like during the school it is now we must want to make sure we have at least a week, you know, where we can just go somewhere, you know, rest. Even for personally, sometimes I go on my own trips, you know. You know, mental health is very important. So yes, but I've got I need to plan, make sure I have people that are covering working at the charity. I have like volunteers on standby to help when I'm away. So I do go on, you know, you know, little um short away away days just to you know cool off, refresh and recharge. Yeah, so fantastic. Yeah, that's good. I have a strong, uh strong network of uh my trustees, but they are very lovely, lovely people. So they always you know make sure that everything is okay with us, so kind of like uh yeah, so the trustees support as well, all the volunteers, this you know, my part-time staff and everybody.

SPEAKER_00 41:00

Yeah, so yeah, one last question.

Research Representation And Clinical Trials

SPEAKER_00 41:03

Okay, I know you there's a lot of research going on with cancer. I know there's a lot to play with the genetics and and everything, and our uh and our race and all of those stuff, or maybe having a record of the history of what killed this person in his family, and uh what what are you predisposed to? Are there things that your charity is doing to ensure that you liaise with uh the any research body with the NHS and the UK to ensure that we have there's an impute of our community in that in that space?

SPEAKER_02 41:37

Yeah, I'm very glad you mentioned that because that's a very big thing for us at the charity, you know, because you know, when they say black women die more from cancer, the first question I asked was why. I was like, why? Because why we have the same doctors, we have the same NHS, we have the same GPS. Why? I kept asking why, why, why? So that was why when I started a charity, and then I hear of you know Cancer Research UK, I'm on them, I'm I'm knocking on their doors, I'm saying, why is this happening? And then they say, Oh, research has not shown anything. I'm like, but why? So now what would they do when they have research meetings? They come to us after you know our charity has been involved in so many research. In fact, during the um greater Manchester Cancer Conference um week, you know, there was so many research we took part in, and then all their posts that we designed. What one of the research we took part in they won the overall postal um, you know, um postal uh in uh competition. So that's how you know how prominent we are. We've taken part in a lot of cancer research UK work. We've done a lot of work with the NHS, the Christie Hospital, University of Manchester, even the University of Aberdeen, University of Bradford, Oxford University, so many universities that are doing a lot of research now. London School of Um, you know, tropical health and uh you know medicine and all that. We are with them. So if you if you put put our name out, probably see a lot of work that we've done with with those groups, vocal when they did the research on breast cancer and uh you know a new mammogram machine. We we provided um people that took part in that research, so we're very keen on taking part in research. That's a very big thing for us because we want to be sure that when they are you know finding treatments and cures, uh our DNA is involved, uh otherwise they would say, and to be fair, you to you you won't believe that back in the for a very long time now, the black people don't take part in research. That's why when they I know when they do medicines, it doesn't work for for our people. Yes, nobody has volunteered to take part. So now clinical trials and research and all of that, they're beginning to come to us now, and we're beginning to make sure that we are if I don't if I if they don't even ask me, I ask. I I don't wait for them to call, I actually ask. So, what are you guys doing about this research? I've got people that can take part, and then so that's that's how we make ourselves you know available. For such things and make sure our data is in there in those respects, those work. Otherwise, it's not just for us now, our children. Yes, our kids that were born here, they they only know this culture, they don't know anything like you know, taboo or anything, they don't know that they know that this is their home and this is their their way of life. So we need to make sure that the we are representing now for our generations to come.

SPEAKER_00 44:24

Yes, wow. Hi Laura, thank you so much. I know you were invited to the king's dinner, tea party. You deserve it. Thank you. You deserve it at this point on the accolade. You deserve it because you are so right. This medication, other people take it because it was not prepared with a DNA included in it. Come on, it's not going to work. So thank you, thank you so much. I hope you enjoyed your tea party.

SPEAKER_02 44:56

Oh, I did. It was a very beautiful experience.

SPEAKER_00 44:59

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 45:00

Have tea in Buckingham Palace.

SPEAKER_00 45:02

Yes, that's good. That's so

Key Takeaways And Final Requests

SPEAKER_00 45:07

good. Now, on this podcast, we normally, you know, we normally just round it up with what are the the points that you want to leave behind for our viewers for them to listen to. And okay, this is a key takeaway that you based on what you do, based on you as a person, based on your experience. What is your final uh word on this episode today for the people that are listening?

SPEAKER_02 45:31

Yeah, I would say, um, you know, your health is yours. Yes, I would say to everybody listening, take your own health seriously. Nobody's gonna look after your health for you, not even your GP, not even your partner, your you yourself, look after your own health. And this is mostly especially for the women. Women, we are so used to looking after everybody. You look after the husband or the partner, you look after the children, you look after the in-laws, you look after everybody, and then you forget yourself. Please don't for women, don't forget yourself. Go for your mammogram if you're over 50, 50, and above, if you're 25 and above, go for your routine cervical cancer screening tests. If you know, if you're called, and then if you see, aside from those um screenings that that the NHS does, cervical screening, breast um screening for 50s and over, and power screening for people over 50 years. There are other things that even if you know you're not prostate cancer, for instance, for the men, if you're not at the age of say 50, where they call you for a PSA test, and you think you have family history, you have symptoms, don't wait for your 50 years to go for test, ask for it now. Don't say I'm 48 in two years' time, I'll be going for my test, but I also already have these signs. Go for ask for that test now. Say to them, I feel this. So take your own health in your own hands. Don't wait for anybody to you know to to probe you, don't wait for anybody to send you a letter if you think there's something worrying. Do do it yourself, go for the test, call your GP. You have a right to call your GP anytime and as many times as you want to call them if you're worried about anything. So take your own health in your own hands.

SPEAKER_00 47:13

Thank you so much, Laura. Then for me, I'm going to tell you look after your emotions. There are studies that have proven that our emotions can also make us heal. Those people that hold things in unforgiveness, people that are always angry, those people that you are going through stress for you to ask for help, but you are staying in that state that leads to chronic stress. I'm going to re-echo what Laura said and look after your own health mentally. Let go of that thing. Offense will not take you anywhere, just holding on to it is like you are taking poison and you are hoping that someone else will die for it. So please let go of those issues that bug you. Me, I try to live a very, very happy life. Before I used to hold all if someone did something to me, I used to hold it when I was younger. But growing up, I don't realize that I want to live longer. I'm doing it for myself. That forgiveness doesn't mean the person will go free. No, I'm doing it for myself. I'm leaving the inside of my body clean for myself. And I don't, I'm not a being, nobody should come and dump nothing nonsense on it. I'm just gonna let go no matter what you do and give space. So please do well, look after yourself, your physical health, do your test, like she said. Don't wait if you have history of anything at all. Follow it up, let your GP know about it until we come your way again. I hope this episode has been it's not what I hope. I know this episode has blessed you. Thank you so much, Laura, for yielding to this interview. May God bless you, may God shine his face on you and bless all you and everything that concerns you in Jesus' name. Thank you so much for joining us today. Please don't just be a viewer, you need to also comment what resonate and share this far and wide so that people can make use of the services. Laura is not charging you anything, she's doing the background work, trying to get the funding, trying to get the research in, trying to everything. All you need to do is make yourself available and use the service when you need it.