3-22 Finding Purpose Through Volunteer Work and Giving Back

What if you could find a deeper sense of purpose simply by giving back? This week on Bella Grace, I recount my exhilarating experience running a relay race to support Build On, a nonprofit committed to providing crucial after-school programs and constructing schools in underserved communities globally. This episode uncovers how the acts of volunteering can break the repetitive cycle of daily life, infusing it with a renewed sense of fulfillment and belonging. By sharing personal stories and reflections, I aim to demonstrate that even the smallest acts of service can leave a lasting impact on both the giver and receiver.

Tune in as we delve into the transformative power of empathy and gratitude fostered through volunteer work. My journey includes organizing a retreat for women affected by incarceration, where I learned the invaluable lessons of connection and perspective. From teaching practical skills like changing a tire to discovering a newfound passion for public speaking, volunteering has the power to nurture empathy and reveal hidden talents. This chapter encourages you to leverage your unique skills to bring about positive change in your community, enriching your own life in the process.

Small acts of giving can create powerful ripple effects in our communities, and this episode underscores how even teaching someone to change their oil can inspire change. Aligning volunteer efforts with personal passions and values not only reinforces our identity but also promotes collective well-being over individual gain. I invite you to reflect on how you can contribute meaningfully to your community and challenge you to share your journey with us. Until next week, stay well, be kind, and find joy in your week.

 #GiveBack #FindYourPurpose #VolunteerImpact #EmpathyInAction #BuildOn #CommunityService #SmallActsBigChange #BellaGracePodcast #BellaGraceJourney #EmpathyAndGratitude #VolunteeringMatters #PurposeAndFulfillment #RelayForChange #PowerOfGiving #WomenHelpingWomen #VolunteeringStories #ServiceWithPurpose #ChangeStartsWithYou #MakeADifference #PositiveRippleEffect #InspireThroughService #FindYourJoy 

Chapters

• 0:04 Finding Purpose Through Volunteer Work
• 12:21 Empathy and Gratitude Through Volunteering
• 30:34 Impact and Purpose Through Contributing
• 37:16 Live With Purpose and Impact

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:04

Hello and welcome to another episode of the Bella Grace podcast. Whether you are struggling to find balance, using unhealthy behaviors or substances to cope, or you just want to unlock the root cause of what's holding you back from living your best life, bella Grace coaching can help you transform your life mind, body and soul and this week we are doing that by talking about finding purpose through volunteer work and giving back. I chose this topic specifically because I just got back from an amazing weekend of volunteering and giving back and running, back and running. So every year, my father-in-law had a project where we set out to run a race, a relay race. There are 12 people in two vans, six people in each van, six runners in each van and a driver, and we split 200 miles between the 12 of us. And why, on God's green earth, do we do that? We do that to raise money for various organizations. Last year, or the last two years, we have raised money for an organization called Build On.

Speaker 1: 1:23

Build On is a nonprofit that is how stationed, headquartered in New York, in the South Bronx, and so but they have locations in Oakland, in South Chicago, in Detroit, I believe, and so what they do is they have after school programs for high school students, and these high school students do service work, and so they most recently did a event called Feed the Hood and they handed out sandwiches to people in the neighborhood who didn't have a meal to eat, who didn't have a meal to eat, and so they really instill in these teenagers a life of service and giving back to the community. And the kiddos who participate in their program are 95% more likely to graduate than their counterparts who aren't in the build-on program. So I think it's an amazing program. I think it really shows that you don't have to have a lot of money or a lot of resources to give back. And so when I was little, when I was younger, I always thought that you had to be rich, it was only the rich people who donated, it was only the rich people who volunteered, and that couldn't be further from the truth. In fact, these kiddos at Build On, they live in some of the lowest income neighborhoods in the country and yet they are serving their community every single day. And so Build On takes these kids. They do the after school program, but in conjunction with that, they also raise money to build schools in other countries, in communities that don't have schools for their kids.

Speaker 1: 3:19

Guys, this weekend we saw a video of a community I believe it was in Nepal. I'm probably wrong, but before Build On came to build the school, these kids were literally going to school under a little canopy that was made out of branches and shrubbery from their community and that's where they were learning. And the kids that didn't fit under the canopy were sitting in a like under another tree, close by learning from another teacher. And so build on comes in and they build a school from the ground. The community chips in by providing the non-skilled labor. So the community comes out and they help build the school too, and then Build On does all the skilled labor. They bring in all the contractors, they build it, they bring in all the engineers and they get a school built. And part of the treaty that they sign with the community says that they won't just send their boys to school. The community says that they won't just send their boys to school, they will also send their girls to school. And let me tell you, as a girl, that really, really, really, really speaks to my heart, because I truly believe, and I know from research, that if women are educated, the community is more likely to come out of poverty because the women are able to work and provide, as well as the men. So that's huge to me. Guys Like that is huge.

Speaker 1: 4:51

And all it cost me was a plane ticket and a new pair of running shoes because I ended up running. I was supposed to run 11 and a half ish miles and I ended up running right over 10. I had to take a break on my second to my last leg and my father-in-law took over and ran the last two miles of my leg. For me it was supposed to be an almost six mile run and I think I ran like three and a half miles and then he took over. So I almost completed all of my miles. But that's all it cost me was getting up and going to do something that I already enjoy, which is running, and I raised a little bit of money from my friends, family, co-workers that donated.

Speaker 1: 5:46

And let me tell you, I am so sore today. I was so sore yesterday on the flight home. I could barely get off the plane. But it was worth it, because I look at the pictures, I look at the videos of those kiddos going to school and it just brings such joy to my heart videos of those kiddos going to school, and it just brings such joy to my heart. And so that is why I chose this topic today because I am fresh off of a giving back Trip, of giving back weekend, and I want to share this joy with you guys.

Speaker 1: 6:19

And so I want to share why it is so important to give back and to volunteer and how it can enrich your life. So the first thing is that giving back and volunteer work fosters a sense of belonging. So volunteering helps individuals connect with their community. It provides a sense of belonging and making a tangible impact on in other people's lives. So the sense of belonging.

Speaker 1: 6:51

We live in a society where we are lonely. So many of us go to work, come home, eat dinner, watch Netflix, go to sleep, wake up, go to sleep, wake up, go to work, eat dinner, watch Netflix and I have nothing against Netflix. I love it. I love all my streaming services. That is my favorite thing to do is to come home and sit on the couch and binge watch a show. Love it, I absolutely love it. Right now I'm watching Dexter in preparation for the new Dexter that's coming out.

Speaker 1: 7:26

But if all of my life is nothing but binge watching shows. Then what is my life really even about? When you introduce yourself to someone, what do you say? I say hi, I'm Teresa. It's usually followed up with cool. What do you do? It's always. What do you do for a living? And I get to tell people that I work for a nonprofit, I am a life coach, I am a photographer, I am a runner and I am a service-minded individual. That's my identity. I love giving back and if my entire life was consumed with Netflix, none of those things would be true. I wouldn't be a runner, I wouldn't be a business owner, I wouldn't have a job that is fulfilling and I wouldn't spend my spare time giving back to my family, friends and my community and the worldwide community like I do.

Speaker 1: 8:29

So having a sense of belonging is so important, especially in this day and age where we're all connected through our cell phones. We say we have friends, but honestly, if you looked at your Instagram friend list, how many of those people could you actually have a real conversation with? Think about it. How many of those people know what's going on in your life right now? What's going on in my life right now is, aside from just getting back from this trip, is that I don't have carpet in my hallway. My daughter's room is a disaster area with no ceiling and no walls, and I just had my roof replaced because a tree fell into my house in May and the damage resulted in flooding, which resulted in the ceiling and my daughter's roof coming down and collapsing along with parts of the walls. I can count on my fingers and my toes, and probably a little bit more. I can count that many people who know what's going on in my life. How many people can you count that know what's going on in your day-to-day life right now? I can honestly say that I have about 20 to 25 people close people in my life right now who know what's going on in my house, know how it's affecting me emotionally, know how it's affecting us financially. They know those details. And the reason I have that many close friends who I can call and say, hey, crap has hit the fan in my house is because I volunteered.

Speaker 1: 10:17

I got out there, I decided to give back to the community and I have made close knit relationships with that many people. Every single one of those relationships started by reaching out and wanting to give back. I joined some groups, I joined some volunteer work. I joined some parties because I wanted to get involved and I wanted to give back, and the result has been a sense of belonging that I wouldn't change for the world, like I would not trade that in for anything I have.

Speaker 1: 10:57

One of those people is my close friend, joe, and he's been on the podcast. Before Y'all know him, he's got several episodes on this podcast. He recently had a birthday and he made a post about how his quote unquote church friends have become his chosen family. That is powerful, guys. That is really powerful, and I am proud to say that I am one of Joe's chosen family. He called me mom, but the reason I know Joe is because he decided to serve at church. He decided to serve at church and he made friends with a girl named Tracy and Tracy served at church and she saw me standing in the church entryway by myself and she walked up to me and she introduced herself and then I started serving at church as a connect group leader and I have met people and then I realized that some of the people that I know know Tracy and Joe and now we have this big, huge group of friends who are all interconnected, and it all started with service, finding purpose through volunteer work and giving back bridges social gaps and allows people to build relationships based on shared values and goals.

Speaker 1: 12:21

And if I'm not proof of that, I don't know what is. Because I have made friends who have the same values as me. I have made friends who have different values than me. I have made friends who walk a totally different life than I do through service and giving back. Another example of this is when I was still living in Lubbock. I joined a group that held a retreat for women who were affected by incarceration, and I was initially invited to the group because my daughter's dad was in prison. And through that group I met girls who have lived their whole life either on the streets or with parents who were incarcerated, who were then incarcerated themselves, who have lived a very different walk than I have.

Speaker 1: 13:22

Yes, I was a drug addict. I struggled with substance use disorder as a teenager and I walked alongside some people that had a very different story than me. I was lucky. I had a dad who poured into me the love of God and the love of Jesus. I had a family who was very close-knit and supportive. I had brothers who refused to let me stay down where I was. I had a very different walk. Yes, I walked with them through substance use disorder, but my background was very different than theirs. I didn't grow up in a family where mom, dad, brothers, sisters, uncles, cousins were all incarcerated or who were drug dealers or who were in gangs. I didn't have that as my story, but I got to come alongside them and I got to show them that, yes, I walked through that and yes, I came out on the other side and, yes, our stories are different. But you can do it too.

Speaker 1: 14:28

And so not only does it allow you to make connections, not only does volunteering and giving back allow you to make connections, not only does volunteering and giving back allow you to make connections with people who have the same values and goals as you. It also allows you to meet people with different values and different goals and come alongside them and show them that there is another way, that there is a way to get out of the rut that they're in and to live a fulfilled life. So that takes me to my second point, that finding purpose through volunteer work and giving back gives you the opportunity to gain perspective and gratitude. So giving back exposes us to different life experiences and helps us to appreciate what we have. So, like I said, when I volunteered for the group that did the retreats for women affected by incarceration, I got to see people who had it worse than I did, and I hate saying that. It's such a cliche phrase Like remember, there are people out there who have it worse than you. I hate that saying, I hate it, but it's true. It is so true.

Speaker 1: 15:41

When you volunteer, you get to see, you take the focus off of yourself and you start looking outward and you start seeing that, hey, I have a lot to be grateful for. I have resources that I can share, I have skills that I can share, I have knowledge that I can share, because all too often we get complacent, we get so used to knowing how to do certain things and we get so used to having certain things that we stop being grateful for those things. Take, for example, if you know how to change your oil, or you know how to change your tire when it's flat, right, you might think, oh, it's no big deal, I know how to change my tire, everybody knows how to change their tire, everybody in my neighborhood knows how to change their oil. Like this is nothing spectacular or grand right Wrong. There are single mothers out there who are desperately trying to figure out how to change their flat tire so that they can go to work, so that they can pay the bills, so that they don't get their electricity cut off. Work so that they can pay the bills, so that they don't get their electricity cut off.

Speaker 1: 16:56

Imagine if you started volunteering to show women how to change their oil or how to change their flat tire. Imagine the impact that you could have. But you can't realize that impact until you change your perspective on your knowledge, your skills and your resources. So whenever you broaden your perspective, it fosters gratitude within you and allows you to cultivate a deeper sense of empathy and compassion for people in your community. So when you might normally get annoyed by the single mom in the grocery store who has three kids and she's trying to figure out how to fit everything in her shopping basket so that she can walk back to the house, once you start working with single moms and showing them how to change their oil, showing them how to change their tires, when you see that single mom struggling or walking her grocery cart back to her house, your perspective changes and you start to have some gratitude and empathy. You have gratitude for the skills that you have, but you start to empathize with that single mom. You can imagine what it would be like to be her. You can put yourself in her shoes and you can have compassion for her and want to change the way that her life works, the way that her life works, and so just want to share that with you.

Speaker 1: 18:37

Guys, you might think that your skills, your knowledge, your passions all of that is whatever. It's everyday knowledge that everybody has and who could benefit from it. Stop thinking of it that way. Let's start exploring how you can use your skills and your knowledge to give back. You don't have to have unlimited resources. You don't have to be a millionaire. You don't have to have a super fancy job to give back. You have within your brain skills, knowledge and resources that other people could use. Now let's get creative about using those to give back and make an impact. The third reason it is important to volunteer and give back is to discover new skills and passions. So volunteer work can lead to discovery of new talents or passions that might not surface in other aspects of your life.

Speaker 1: 19:39

So something that came out of me volunteering at this retreat for women affected by incarceration was I discovered that I'm actually a pretty good public speaker. A pretty good public speaker. I was invited to share my story of how I was impacted by incarceration, and my story is that I was a teenager when I was introduced to methamphetamines. In less than six months, I was an everyday meth user. I was a senior in high school and I was high every day and nobody knew. Fast forward a year later I was 18 years old and I was being arrested for being in the wrong place at the wrong time with the wrong people. Being arrested for being in the wrong place at the wrong time with the wrong people. And then I got sober, by the grace of God, about a year and a half later.

Speaker 1: 20:42

My entire drug use spanned a little less than three years and in that three years I wreaked havoc on my life. I derailed my dreams. I derailed my dreams. I derailed my aspirations. I had dreamt of living in Dallas and New York and being an attorney and having this big grand career. And suddenly I was nowhere near accomplishing any of those dreams. I was in rehab, I was working as a truck stop waitress and I was on probation. Yeah, I derailed my life that quick in three years.

Speaker 1: 21:29

But I met a guy in the trailer park where I did drugs and he came up to me and said hey, you are the most sane person in this trailer park. Can I pay you to be sober Monday through Friday and take care of my son? I said, sure, he's like I don't care what you do on the weekends, I will pay you X amount of dollars. I just need you to be sober Monday through Friday, take care of my son. Sure, my drug addict brain was like, yes, spending money for drugs on the weekend, right, yeah, that was my thought process. But he and I eventually started a relationship. I sobered up and I got pregnant.

Speaker 1: 22:16

Six months after I got sober and seven months after my daughter was born, he was sentenced to 15 years in prison and suddenly I was a single mom in college, just now getting my life back on track. Single mom in college, just now getting my life back on track, I found out I was pregnant, january 2006. My daughter was born January 2007. Her dad was incarcerated, october of 2007. In July well, in June of 2007, I was like, oh crap, I'm pregnant and I can't be a waitress for the rest of my life. So I went back to school and I was going to school full time and working part-time as a waitress. And then her dad was incarcerated and he was sentenced to 15 years and that was a huge punch to the gut.

Speaker 1: 23:30

Suddenly, I was a single mom in college, working part-time and trying to figure out how to move forward. And I did, and I stayed in school and I worked full-time, went to school full-time and was a single mom, and I made it work. It was hard. It was so hard. I wanted to give up so many times.

Speaker 1: 23:56

But going back to drugs was not an option. Quitting my job was not an option. Quitting school was not an option. I had to give my daughter a better life than I did, than I had. I couldn't go back and that was the story that I shared to a room full of women whose lives have been impacted by themselves being incarcerated or a family member being incarcerated, a spouse being incarcerated, and it was at that moment that I realized that I was a pretty dang good public speaker, and so that's why I'm saying that volunteering, giving back, being of service to people, can help you discover new skills and passions that you didn't realize that you had. And from that, almost what? 15 years later, 20 years later? Well, 15 years later, 15 years after I volunteered with that group, this podcast was born out of a new passion being born for public speaking, sharing my story and bringing awareness to the fact that you can transform your life, mind, body and soul. So all of that, to say that volunteering, giving back and being of service to people, allows for this exploration, which can ignite a sense of purpose because it aligns your skills with meaningful causes. So that is point number three. So, point number four it improves your mental and emotional well-being. There have been studies that show that helping others reduces stress. It combats depression and boosts self-esteem, which leads to more fulfilled and purpose-driven lives. So, yeah, I started volunteering with that group. I believe it was. It was in 2011.

Speaker 1: 26:22

In 2011, my fiance died, six weeks before our wedding, of an accidental opiate overdose. He had mixed an over-the-counter cough and cold medicine with a potent opiate, which is a painkiller, with a potent opiate, which is a painkiller, and many of you have heard me tell this story before, but I was in a very dark place. I was on antidepressants, I was on suicide watch because the antidepressants caused suicidal thoughts, and so I had people staying with me around the clock to just keep an eye on me. And then I was approached by a girl at church and she said hey, I would love for you to be a part of our children's ministry. And so I did. I started working with the kids and honestly I don't like kids, so I don't know why she asked me to do it. But it was in that room with those kids where I made connections that led to me meeting the ladies who were running that retreat for people, for women affected by incarceration affected by incarceration.

Speaker 1: 27:48

And by the time I left the children's ministry and started working with the retreat team, I was no longer on my antidepressants, I was living life. I was me again, I was doing the things that I loved, that I had forgotten about through my drug-induced years, and I was finally living with purpose. And I had this sense of fulfillment. It was emotional fulfillment and I just I couldn't hold it in anymore. I wanted to spread it. So the act of giving without expecting anything in return creates emotional fulfillment and reinforces a cycle of kindness. It's kind of like when you go to McDonald's and the car in front of you says I'm going to pay for their coffee. So then you pay for the next car's coffee and then they pay for the next car's coffee. Right, it's this cycle of kindness that continues.

Speaker 1: 28:45

And through that organization with the retreat, I was able to see how my story impacted people and how other people's stories impacted people, and these women were going on to then volunteer and be a part of the retreat team. Some of them went out and started their own organizations and started their own activities with people affected by incarceration. Others went on to volunteer at prisons and work with women who were currently incarcerated. And so when you step out of your own bubble, when you get off the couch and turn off the Netflix and go out and use your skills, your knowledge and your resources to give back, you are actively improving not only your own emotional well-being, but you're creating this cycle, this positive cycle of kindness. The other thing that you're doing is you are building a legacy. So volunteering allows people to contribute to something bigger than themselves, creating a lasting legacy through the impact they make in their communities. It also offers a way to leave a positive mark on the world, even in a small yet meaningful way.

Speaker 1: 30:04

So I wasn't out there impacting thousands of lives with that retreat. No, I was impacting 10, 15 women. I was and I probably wasn't even impacting all of them. Probably some of them were like who's this princess P up here, acting like she knows who we are? Yeah, some of them probably didn't even hear me, but guess what? There was that one person that I impacted and that's all that matters.

Speaker 1: 30:34

It doesn't matter if you're volunteering for some huge organization that makes global impact. What matters is that you change one life. You change one life. You use your skills, your resources, your knowledge to impact even just one life. You never know how big of a ripple effect that one person's impact is going to have. What if that one single mom that you help learn how to change her oil is then able to save some money to send her son to some after school program that is going to teach him these skills that are going to carry him off into college and he's going to have this grand career, all because you taught his mom how to change her oil? Can you imagine? You may never know the lasting impact that you have, but that is a legacy that will be here long after you are gone, and I want us to get out of the mindset that we have to have much to give before we can give. That's not true.

Speaker 1: 31:42

God said to whom? What is it? I just drew a blank. It is when you can be trusted with little to whom little is given to. Oh, I just drew a blank, guys, on the Bible verse. But basically, like, if I can trust you with a little bit, then I'll give you more, because I know that I can trust you with the little right. Like, if God can trust you with this teeny, tiny little bit of knowledge, skills and resources, he can trust you to make an impact with that, then he can give you more and you can make a bigger impact.

Speaker 1: 32:19

Imagine that. Imagine that. Imagine that. Imagine if you had a shop where you could do private sessions, one-on-one sessions, group sessions with moms, single moms, teaching them how to do mechanic work. We have a friend in our church that does that. He has a connect group where you can come in and it's not just women, I don't think. I think it's anybody. You can come in learn minor mechanic work. They'll do the mechanic work with you, teach you how to do it, and really all you're paying for, I believe, is the parts. But that is a big impact because he has been faithful with the little and now he's able to make a big impact with the more. So that's building a legacy. Guys, we want to build a legacy.

Speaker 1: 33:09

What do you want to leave behind when you die? Because, face it, we're all going to die. What do you want to leave behind? Another reason to find purpose through giving and volunteer work is that, through volunteer work, individuals can align their values whether it's environmental conservation, social justice, education with actionable efforts to create real world change. Right now, we are in the midst of an insane election and it has our country divided. Let's say that you are passionate about helping this election. Maybe that looks like printing off a bunch of QR codes and walking around and inviting people to get signed up to vote. What does it mean to you? What do you want to do? What kind of changes do you want to make? They don't have to be huge. Like I've said, tiny, actionable efforts that create real world change.

Speaker 1: 34:12

Imagine if you got people to vote. How much impact would that have? How much impact would that have? This aligns. This alignment between beliefs and actions reinforces a person's sense of identity and purpose. So, when you are making change, when you're making an impact. It gives you a sense of identity and a sense of purpose. It takes you off the couch watching Netflix 24-7 and puts you in the world doing things that align with who you are as a person. Who are you as a person? Like I said earlier, what do you say when people ask what you do? Do you default to your job? Don't you want to be more than just your job title? Don't you want to be able to say I impact lives? Just a question.

Speaker 1: 35:09

If you've made it this far in the podcast, I think the answer is yes. I think you're looking for something to give you purpose, and maybe that starts with analyzing your passions, your skills, your knowledge and your resources and see where that takes you. What are you passionate about? What are you good at, what do you have skills for, and how can you use that to impact the world around you? That to impact the world around you. My last point is that it strengthens your life purpose through contribution. So the sense of fulfillment that comes from giving back reinforces a deeper life purpose. It shifts the focus from personal gain to collective well-being. Again, it takes the spotlight off of you and puts it on everyone else. So it's no longer about how much I can make, how much I can do. It's not the accolades and the degrees. It's about how can we make this world a better place.

Speaker 1: 36:16

Purpose often emerges from contributing to causes that improve the world, bringing personal satisfaction and clarity. So I do the run every year. My husband does it because he likes to run. I do it because I want to make an impact on the world and on the lives of teenagers, because I truly believe and I know that our teenagers excuse me, our teenagers are our future, and if we're not pouring into them, we aren't pouring into our future. We aren't pouring into the future generations of this world. And so I do the run because I am passionate about the things that Build On is doing.

Speaker 1: 37:16

I was passionate about things that World Vision, their lives have a sense of purpose, have an identity and be able to answer that question of what do you do with more than just their job title, because we weren't made to just be a job title. We were made to impact our world. So how can you do that? How can you get off the couch and start using your skills, your passion, your resources and your knowledge to impact the world around you. I'd love to hear your answer. Shoot me a message. Comment below. Like and subscribe guys Until next week. Be well, be kind, and may you find some joy this week. Bye.