55: The Hidden Reason Online Service Providers Start Losing Momentum

You know the cycle. Things start working in your business. You feel momentum building. And then you pull back. You start tweaking things instead of getting your work out into the world.

It’s confusing because you want to move forward but instead if feels like you are circling.  

In today’s episode, I’m breaking down what’s really happening underneath that cycle,  and why more strategy or mindset work isn’t the solution.

We’ll talk about:

• The fine line between helpful research and hiding behind your laptop
• How nervous system safety impacts your ability to keep growing
• Why more strategy, discipline, or mindset work isn’t the real solution
• How embodiment work helps you create the safety you need to move forward

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Transcript

Tertia [00:00:00]:
Has it ever happened to you that as soon as your business starts getting momentum, as soon as things start picking up, something happens and you pull back, you start stalling, you suddenly lose steam, even though you don't want to. This is one of the most confusing patterns that I see in other business owners. It's something that I have experienced myself. And it can be so confusing because it's not that you don't know what you want, and it's not that you're not taking action, but it's that you're taking action on the wrong things. And in this episode, I want to name what's actually happening underneath that cycle, what's actually going on, so that you can have a new way of seeing what's happening. And when you have that awareness, you can start to do things differently. Welcome to Beyond Burnout for Driven Women. I'm Tertia. And this is where we go from burnout to abundance. And we take your nervous system along for the ride. If you have been doing all of the right things, but you are still not feeling that shift, you are in the right place. Here we explore embodiment nervous system work and how to be magnetic without going into overdrive or, or burning yourself out. So I was on a call recently with a potential client, and she's a coach. She's been working with her clients successfully and she was in a space where she wanted to take her business to the next level. So for her, that meant reworking her offers and increasing her prices. And what happened is instead of continuing to engage with her audience and her clients like, like she used to, she started spending most of her time behind a laptop. She was looking at what other coaches were doing, what they were calling themselves, what kind of offers they had, what their websites looked like. And so she basically started spending more of her time engaged behind the scenes than actually getting her work out into the world. And I think there's a very fine line that we have to walk here. And as business owners, as service providers, it's important for us to do the market research, right? We don't want to bring something into the world that nobody wants doing. Market research is an important reference gathering point, right? We need to see what others are doing, how people are pricing themselves, positioning themselves, and the kind of structures they had in place. This is how we can begin to calibrate ourselves and measure what, what resonates. We can start gathering ideas, but here's when it becomes a problem. When that research turns into spending endless hours tweaking and swirling in self doubt. And waking up at 2am in the morning because you're wondering about should you change your introduction paragraph, should you change your call to action? Should something be written in a different way for people to actually get what it is that you are trying to do? Right? And when you stop doing what you what already works, like connecting to your clients and showing up and being visible and actually selling and enrolling clients, when you stop doing that, what I see is busy happening is we want to take that step, but there's something that's stopping us from going in all the way. And it is a lot safer to sit behind your laptop where no one can see you and you can write your heart out versus taking this offer to your people. And nobody buys. I get that. So how do we then find this balance between doing the research and making sure that our offer is something that our clients want versus actually going out into the unpredictability and risking ourselves? And this is where embodiment work comes in. Because what I see is often what happens is when we find ourselves stalling like this. And I know what I'm talking about because it happened to me. I was there myself. It happened the first time when I switched from doing mostly eft tapping with my clients into doing feminine embodiment coaching, of which I'm a certified coach. And then as a feminine embodiment coach. It also happened when I changed my niche, when I moved away from focusing solely on activating feminine energy. And I moved from teaching about the feminine to letting my clients experience the feminine whole through the embodiment work that I do with them. And I know how easy it is to go in some type of freeze state whenever we are changing. And what happens is we, we end up thinking that it's mindset work, we need to do more mindset work. Because yes, you can see that you stuck. You can see that you are delaying. You can see that you aren't selling, you aren't showing up, you aren't connecting with your clients. Instead you're just sitting behind the computer typing the whole day. And then we end up thinking it's mindset work that we need or we need a different strategy. You think that there's something wrong with your discipline, you need to be more disciplined, or perhaps your plan isn't clear enough, you need a different tactic. And all of these ideas that we have, it makes sense because those are the most common solutions that are being offered. Right? Whenever we get into business coaching or we do personal development work or any of the mindset approaches, it always Focuses on the cognitive layers, the tactical layers. So whenever we start feeling unsafe within ourselves because of a change that's happening in our external world, it's. Even if that is a change by our choice, it's quite natural to assume we need to externally adjust something. And this can so easily lead to a cycle where you keep on trying to refine your execution, you keep on trying to improve what you're writing without understanding what's actually going on underneath the surface. And it has everything to do with safety. It's how safe you feel to be who you are in the space where your business is. Now. If we don't feel safe to be ourselves, what happens is our energy pulls back, it creates hesitation, right? We find things to keep ourselves busy with. We start doubting whether people will understand what it is that we actually selling. And maybe we should go back to the drawing board and work a few little things. It's almost like a little dog chasing its own tail. And you seem like you're getting things done. It seems that you are doing things, but you are not getting the results that you want. And internally, what happens is your tension starts building, your capacity to hold this beautiful business that you wanting to create for yourself, the capacity for that become strained, right? And then what happens is the more strained we feel internally, the more tense we feel, the more action we are going to take in the outside world to relieve the tension. And this action that we're taking, it's. That's the action that I'm talking about. This is not always the action that is moving our business forward in the way that it wants because it keeps us stuck. And. And what this potentially could look like in your life is when you put yourself out there and then you pull back, and then you put yourself out there and then you pull back. And it's exactly for this reason that embodiment is the work that changes everything. So I define embodiment as inhabiting your full self. And when we do embodiment work in this manner where we inhabit our full selves, not where we try to embody the next version of ourselves, but we embody ourselves as who we already are in this moment. We allow all parts of ourselves to exist. We allow all of us, or we bring all of us, all of ourselves to the table, we show all of ourselves to the client because we accept and we love all of who we are, even our gnarly bits and our bits that other people told us is not good enough, or that there's something wrong with certain parts and aspects of who we are when we move from that space, that space of I'm safe to be me, I'm inhabiting myself fully. It has the effect of your nervous system capacity increasing. Okay, so what does this mean in real terms? It means that you stop blocking yourself, you stop stalling, you stop finding things to do that looks like it's effective, but it doesn't really move the needle because you are feeling safe internally, because you have the capacity, and because you are now able to move in alignment with your own truth. Right? So the decisions that you start making, the words that you start using, the resonance that you hold is in alignment with who you are. You are. And when we show up from a place like that, even if we don't show up perfectly, and I'm putting perfectly in quotes, in fact, the more authentically we can show up in our own imperfection, the greater is our capacity to hold businesses that really serve us and serve our clients. The greater is our capacity to navigate, like, the ebbs and the flows of business. Because if you have been in business for any amount of time, you know that it's not always smooth sailing. And you have the capacity now to hold yourself on that edge of your growth as you step as yourself into your next level. So if you have been changing your website for the gazillionth time and you now have had so many different bios, you can't even remember what it is that you really support your clients with anymore. What I want you to know is that you don't need another strategy. You don't need to get your discipline right or your mindset right or just push through. What you do need is to drop into your body to create that safety in your nervous system so that you can unravel the patterns. And this is what feminine embodiment does beautifully. Feminine embodiment coaching. And in my work, I specifically support you to unravel the deeper patterns that is under the level of awareness that's causing you to show up in a way that doesn't serve you based on what is held in your nervous system. All right, so there is absolutely a way out of this. And in fact, I'm actually teaching a master class in two weeks. It's called the Embodied Entrepreneur Masterclass workshop. Because you're not going to only get theory. I'm also going to work with you on an active challenge that you are currently experiencing in your business. The link for signing up for that masterclass slash workshop is in the show notes. So make sure that you sign up and right Now I don't know if a replay is going to be available. I'm still feeling into that. It is going to be more helpful for you if you are in the room with me so that we can work with your challenge in real time. And if you have any questions that come up or any anything that comes up in your experience that I'm right there for you to answer any questions that you might so again, it's my free Embodied Entrepreneur masterclass and that's happening in two weeks from the date that this show airs. So make sure that you sign up. The link is in the show notes. I hope that today's episode gave you a new perspective and that this will allow you to start doing things differently. The moment that we can name something, the moment that we have an awareness around something, it shifts us in into a position of power where we can begin to choose differently. And I trust that what I shared with you in this episode will help you to do that. I'd love to hear from you so you can reach out to me on Instagram, send me a dm. I will leave the link for you in the show notes as well. And if your business bestie needs to hear this, then go on and share the episode with her. Thank you so much for joining me and I will speak to you soon. Bye.